It’s not a complicated answer. Al Qaida’s attack on the U.S. was motivated by religious fundamentalism. So the lesson learned should be to oppose and quell religious fundamentalism. But we did the opposite. We turned to our own churches and gave them even more power over society than they already had. We propagated Islamophobia, drawing sharper divides between faiths than those that had inspired the attacks to begin with. We launched two holy wars, fighting fire with fire as we’ve attempted to assert our “Judeo-Christianity” world-power authority over those who don’t fit the mold. And we did it all because we’re insecure, because we’re a nation who relies on faith—God shed his grace on thee—to find meaning and value in the potential we have to be great.

It’s ten years later, and look where we are. Islamophobia is a multi-billion dollar industry. War persists without end, though the Arab Spring brings hope that change will come not at the hands of an outside force but from within those nations who will no longer suffer tyrants. And on our home soil, we have creeping Dominionism, the effort to impose Christian dominion over the “seven mountains” of society: government, education, media, arts & entertainment, religion, family, and most importantly, business. As Christian leaders motivate fear of Islam through so-called “creeping Sharia”—the  absurd idea that Muslims have already started taking over our communities and instituting strict Sharia Law—they are using this fear to impose their own control over society. And while some like Pat Robertson and Matt Barber now play coy as if they’ve never heard of Dominionism, let alone the fact they contribute to it on a daily basis, Dominionism is more visible and present in mainstream America than ever before and well connected to the entire religious right. Texas Gov. Rick Perry’s prayer rally this Summer (which featured a wide array of religious right leaders making cameos), was predominated by some of the top names in Dominionism. Both he and Rep. Michele Bachmann have close ties to the movement and our frontrunner Republican presidential candidates.

The answer to Muslim fundamentalism is not Christian fundamentalism. Both are warring factions, fighting for power and control over society. The creeds that inform them do little to distinguish them. Both need to be opposed.

The attacks on 9/11/2001 taught us how destructive religious fundamentalism can be to mind and heart. Until we learn to resist fundamentalism’s lust for hegemony, we will continue to fall victim to the very primitive notions that caused 9/11. The time is over for sadness, confusion, insecurity, and fear. It’s time for courage of conviction, organized inclusion, trust in one another, and confidence in the power of diversity. We must avail ourselves of a society in which all people can live freely without imposition of one faith group or another. The goal should be harmony, not “safety.”

It’s been a while since I’ve taken time out to critique the privilege religion has over society, but I hope that today, whoever’s out there reading this thinks of nothing else. Where would we be today if ten years ago, we realized that the scariest threat to our world is shallow, insecure thinking and that the answer is to reach out to one another rather than cloistering ourselves off and forcing everybody else out?

Where would we be if we treated people the way we want people to be treated rather than just the way we think our particular version of God wants us to be treated?

Until we learn that lesson, we are no safer than we were ten years ago today.

Me at age 14 with friend, Esther. (2000)

I’ve always been anal. I’ve always liked there to be a time and place for everything, and I can get frustrated when things don’t fit together, like a song that has no chorus. There was a time in my life when a drastic shift in theme, character, or setting between seasons was enough for me to stop watching a beloved television show. And there used to be a time when I assumed the theme, characters, and setting of my life would be exactly as I had planned them out. I don’t really buy these preferences anymore, and I feel like I’m all the wiser for it.

Today I mark the big 26. What is that, late-mid 20′s? I insist it’s still mid-20′s. It’s not that I have any problem with getting old—it’s just that life feels so new this year that I prefer the “younger” framing. Twenty-six isn’t really “big” or “the”-worthy either, but this birthday feels significant, because it’s my first in a new era of my existence.

Last year at 25 should have been significant. A perfect square, a quarter of a century. But who cares about numbers?I was unemployed and living in complete uncertainty for what my future held. Boy was I surprised at just what 25 would bring with it.

Now I have a job! I’m living on my own! And I’m part of a big city for the first time in my life. And that job? Totally not what I thought it would be. I wrote back in March that this new life course made little sense to me when compared to my previous life plan, and I’m still not sure it does. But it’s the path I’m on now… and it’s just peachy.

So here’s a little thought on the passage of time. Whatever comes next doesn’t necessarily have to have anything to do with what came before. As individuals, we are the sum total of our experiences. The world presents us with a whole lot of dots and our lives are what connect them. When we die—or at any point along the way—we can look back and measure our lives not just by the quantity of our accomplishments, but by the tapestry we wove, the picture we unknowingly drew.

It’s pretty cheesy and platitudinous, I know. But that’s just where I am with things. When you let go of all those certainties and expectations society provides, life is a whole lot more exciting and surprising.

So cheers to living life as a rhapsody and dropping glitter on all those strophic codgers.

Zack and Peterson welcome Peter Leeson onto the show this week—do note the distinction between Peterson and Peter LEEson. Our first trans-Atlantic guest! (Shane doesn’t count because he was in the U.S. with us when we recorded.) Peter came out as gay to his wife of 27 years at the age of 53 and decided to maintain his faithfulness to her. He shares with us his story about coming to terms with his identity during andropause and his experiences working with the LGBTQ community while not “acting” on his sexuality. Learn more about his story through the links below!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Peter was profiled in The Times (Times subscribers only).

» Peter also shared his story in the short film, “Latecomers.”

» Also mentioned: The Boston Diocese lists all its accused child abusers.

After a little hiatus, the podcast is back with some lighter fare discussion about pop culture, but of course with the brilliant analysis and commentary you expect from the likes of Peterson and Zack. Follow the rambling discussion through Lady Gaga/Jo Calderone, Dancing with the Stars, Torchwood, Mad Men, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, Crazy Stupid Love, Laughter in the Dark, and more. Also, you’ll find out just what Peterson was doing during last week’s east coast earthquake. Leave comments and hit us up on Twitter!

This week, Zack and Peterson continue the conversation about ex-gay therapy in the media — in particular, the NPR story that featured Peterson. But though some media portrayals still aren’t getting the message right, a new film paints a better picture. This Is What Love In Action Looks Like follows the story of Zach Stark, the 16-year-old who was forced into Love In Action’s Refuge program by his parents and provided detailed accounts of its rules and “therapies” on his MySpace. By showing how harmful ex-gay therapy can be, this film creates a new opportunity to educate the public on the harms of ex-gay therapy.

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» TP: NPR Misrepresents Ex-Gay Therapy As ‘Controversial’ And Still Up For ‘Debate’
» TP: NPR’s Featured ‘Ex-Gay’ Guest Commits Over $200,000 To Dangerous, Unscientific Ex-Gay ‘Coachings’
» PT: Ex-Gay on NPR. Wrong question & Things unmentioned
» TP: Ten Things NPR Got Wrong Defending The Falsely Balanced Ex-Gay Story

» TP: Profiting Off Stigma: Janet Boynes, Bachmann’s Ex-Gay, Anti-Gay Superstar

» Ex-Gay Watch: Review: This Is What Love in Action Looks Like (Includes Upcoming Screening Dates)

Thanks to Michele Bachmann’s family business, ex-gay therapy is getting mainstream coverage in the news once again. But is it getting the coverage it deserves? Peterson and Zack welcome Christine Robinson back to the podcast to discuss how the media can better respond to the ex-gay movement and challenge the harmful rhetoric that continues to permeate society. Check out the many links below for the latest.

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Listen back to our November 2010 interview with Christine.

» Citation and abstract for “Genocidal Intentions: Social Death and the Ex-Gay Movement” (Spivey & Robinson, 2010).

» Marcus Bachmann calls gays “barbarians” who need to be “disciplined.” The barbarians protest.

» Young people are more susceptible to ex-gay rhetoric.

» Ex-gay Stephen Bennett on Joy Behar.

Reverend Elizabeth Jeremiah (from the Elizabeth Jeremiah Global Worldwide Ministries in Jesus) stops by (hacks in) to the podcast today to chat with Zack about polygamy. The Brown family from TLC’s “Sister Wives” is suing the state of Utah to overturn the criminal ban on bigamy, and Rev. Jeremiah has some Biblical precedent to support their case. Peterson makes it back into the call to add some context from Dan Savage about being “monogamish.” Is it right to assume that monogamy is the best solution for all relationships? We pull back the curtain a bit on marriage and hope you join the conversation!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» The family from “Sister Wives” sues Utah over privacy protections.

» Dan Savage talks about being “monogamish” with his husband.

Peterson has wronged Zack; can Zack forgive him? In this fairly sober episode, Zack and Peterson dig into the idea of reconciliation and building bridges between the queer community and those who oppose it. What does it look like to build a bridge between conflicting groups? What kind of sacrifices and compromises need to be made to build it and by whom? There are those who seek to develop a bond of understanding between the groups, but what factors ensure the success of that effort? Once you listen, please feel free to leave your thoughts as a comment or email them to us at zackfordblogs@gmail.com and p2saki@gmail.com.

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Check out Jane Brazell’s blog. She contributed some great thoughts to our discussion this week.

» The random feminist quote Peterson shared came from Ellen Willis.

» Check out the ABC News coverage of Marcus Bachmann’s reparative therapy clinic.

Zack and Peterson celebrate the recent marriage equality victory in New York, but mourn with Marvin that GENDA still hasn’t passed. After a broader discussion on the role of marriage in the LGBT movement, Zack vents a bit about President Obama’s un”evolving” position on the issue. There are also some shoutouts to some other cool trans and gender-neutral content. Check out the links!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Gender neutral pre-school in Sweden.

» Did NY LGBs Win Marriage By Throwing Trans-Friendly GENDA Under The Bus?

» Justin Bond: ‘I think everybody’s trans’

» Catch Kimberly Reed’s story on The Moth Podcast while it’s still up!

» Peterson on the Anarchist Reverend.

» TIMELINE: Tracking Barack Obama’s Position On Marriage Equality

This post was generated live at Netroots Nation 2011 in Minneapolis, MN.

I want to offer one more post today synthesizing what I addressed in my previous two posts today. In both, I spoke to the partnerships between groups and strategies that are often perceived as antagonistic, and in this third post, I want to make sense of that in a discussion about trust.

Trust between individuals and groups can be incredibly difficult to build and requires outreach in both directions. Organizations need to be able to trust that the bloggers who may very well criticize them and hold them accountable are committed to the same efforts of LGBT equality. Likewise, bloggers need to be able to trust that the organizations are prioritizing the movement over the organization and that their strategies are an effective approach to the desired solutions. In the same vein, insider and outsider organizations need to be able to trust that the strategy of the other is ultimately contributing to the success, not creating new obstacles.

In achieving this trust across the movement, risks have to be taken. Insider organizations have a particular obligation to earn trust with other leaders in the movement. By including them in off-the-record conversations about their strategy, they can entrust bloggers, direct action groups, and others with certain tips that can accentuate the campaign. Ego cannot get in the way of this happening; if any particular group or individual attempts to take full credit on an initiative, they are effectively eliminating the potential to build a coalition.

Likewise, as skeptical as “outsiders” might be, giving the insiders a certain benefit of doubt goes a long way to building the bridge of trust from the other direction. There are definitely times when a blogger’s investigation can blow the lid on what might have been a very successful strategy. My hope would be that insider orgs see the value of blogger and queer media perspectives, even if it’s not the picture they would paint. Effective communication across that bridge can alleviate all of these problems; bloggers can honor the confidentiality of the big orgs as the orgs bring the bloggers into the over-arching strategy.

I’ll leave it at that for now. This is a complicated paradigm change we must achieve, but it’s built on lessons learned from campaigns over the past decade. If we can tap into that greater synergy and see the interacting potential of diverse strategies across the movement, our in-fighting will come to an end and our success will be guaranteed.

This post was generated live at Netroots Nation 2011 in Minneapolis, MN.

As groups debate the best strategy for moving an LGBT equality agenda, there is often a perceived conflict between the “insider” private negotiating and the “outsider” public direct actions, blogging, etc. As I’ve listened to the dialogues this weekend, it seems to me that the conflict is, in fact, perceived. While various groups, leaders, lobbyists, and bloggers might not agree with each other’s strategies, that disagreement does not mean that the strategies actually conflict. In stark contrast, the diverse strategies can actually create an incredibly synergistic movement if strategists use each other’s tactics instead of just worrying about distinguishing themselves.

Unfortunately, egos on both sides and the absence of an orchestrator for the meta-movement seem to prevent this synergy from being fully realized.

I thought that Heather Cronk from GetEQUAL made this point most eloquently in a panel Thursday morning about Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and the DREAM Act. When GetEQUAL did direct actions at the White House fence, it might have superficially looked like a rebellion against the insider tactics of “Gay, Inc.” lobbying that a group like HRC traditionally does. But the two are not mutually exclusive. As Heather pointed out, “moments of chaos help cut through the political bullshit,” and actually create more space for the HRCs of the movement to exert more power. They can go into the meetings and say, “Look, we’re trying to make this work, but we’ve got these ‘crazies’ acting out, so you have to give us more to work with.”

Some might not buy that argument, but as we realized in the LGBT strategy session yesterday, there is another very important benefit to those kinds of direct actions. Even if the action does not directly benefit the political negotiating, it indirectly supports the movement by generating media stories. Often times, there is very little happening in the news to sustain coverage of a particular issue (e.g. ENDA). Blogs cannot drive any coverage to the mainstream media if there are no stories to cover. Introduce a well-executed direct action, however, and we get breaking news, several days of coverage, follow-up for arrests and trials, and more importantly, personal faces on the issue. Even if insider groups cannot use the direct action in their negotiations, those negotiations still benefit from media attention and the shaping of public opinion on the issue.

The outcome, inarguably, is synergistic momentum, and I think the DADT effort exemplified the way it can work. While some may try to paint a revisionist perspective, there was a sharp divide in early 2010 between activists and the Obama administration about what approach to take on repeal. The administration was opposed to pursuing any legislative repeal until after the military survey was complete, rather than concurrently. While it’s hard to argue what-if’s, I think there is a compelling case to make that direct actions by GetEQUAL and SLDN’s blog-promoted campaign of letters from servicemembers advanced the campaign that made sure repeal happened before the end of 2010.

Regardless of our roles in the movement, we all need to get to a place where we see the difference between “I wouldn’t do that” and “We shouldn’t do that.” There might never be an orchestrator to “conduct” the movement at a meta-level above all of its players. If, however, we can trust each other and play off each other instead of playing against each other, we can truly work in concert toward the LGBT equality we all believe in.

This post was generated live at Netroots Nation 2011 in Minneapolis, MN.

I haven’t posted much here on good ol’ ZFb (I’ve been kind of busy), but I thought it would be a good place to share a few thoughts from my weekend at Netroots Nation. Many of our conversations this week — particularly in the LGBT movement — have been about cooperation between blogs and organizations, as well as the sustainability of independent blogs. I want to share a little case study from this very weekend that I think exemplifies effective partnership. (I’m also happy to share this because it speaks to the amazing work the staff at GLAAD continues to do despite the upheaval in its leadership right now.)

On Thursday, I was going through some of the day’s news and found a story about a lesbian couple who were harassed by a security guard at a Minnesota Twins game. Because the Twins had announced the day before they would be creating an “It Gets Better” video, it seemed important to highlight that videos don’t solve all problems. I was sitting next to my good friend Allison Palmer, GLAAD’s Director of Digital Initiatives, and I mentioned it to her; she hadn’t yet heard about it. We had a great off-the-record conversation (that I got permission to mention here) about the incident as two individuals with unique professional perspectives. Allison had some great ideas and opinions that I definitely incorporated into my post at ThinkProgress; my post was stronger because of my conversation with her.

Shortly after Allison and I parted ways, I got an email from her colleague, Aaron McQuade (GLAAD’s Deputy Director of News and Field Media). Allison had let Aaron know about the story, and he contacted me to share some extra details from his direct interactions with the team and the commitment they’d made to GLAAD to rectify the situation. I incorporated them into the post, which had fortunately not yet been published.

Then, shortly after my post went up, GLAAD published their post, crediting (and more importantly, linking back to!) my post on the story. Obviously, the tone of my post (“It doesn’t get better…”) was quite different from GLAAD’s (“Twins will reach out…”), but in exactly the ways that respect our unique goals as a blogger and an org. For this “small” story, both the blogger and the org were able to benefit from cooperation without compromising.

So, here are the highlights of this experience:

» The blogger and someone from the organization had insightful, off-the-record conversation that highlighted both sides’ perspectives.

» The org provided background info about its response to support the blogger’s story.

» The blogger was given the opportunity to “break” the story first.

» The org linked back to the blog to support the blog’s traffic.

» Though the blog and org approached the story in different ways, the result was a synergistic response to the incident.

At the end of the day, an incident of harassment at a baseball game is not going to be the revolutionizing political story of the year, but here it demonstrates how the “insiders” and the “outsiders” can work together toward the common goal of LGBT equality.

Two episodes in one week! Well, kind of. Not for us. But we’re back, and this week we dive head first into the Anthony Weiner “scandal.” So he showed some PG-13 pics on Twitter, but what did he actually do wrong? Listen as Peterson and Zack consider the matter from a perspective of sexual liberation. And then, we offer some tips on giving great workshops at conferences, with a brief lesson on Howard Gardner’s (not John Gardner’s) multiple intelligences. Peterson has lots of background sounds and Zack sounds like he’s in a submarine and getting everyone’s name wrong (sorry, Sen. Kyl — kind of), but the discussion will be so captivating you won’t even notice!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Learn more about Gardner’s multiple intelligences!

It’s the long lost episode! Zack and Peterson remained unraptured, but Zack’s blog definitely took a hit and the podcasting utility was down. But things are right again and the episode is finally up for you to listen! We started recording around 5:50 PM on May 21st and continued the discussion through the non-existent earthquake and Rapture while birds chirped in the background and friends sipped on alcoholic beverages. What’s up with this Rapture thing, and what does it mean for our lives from here on out? Take a listen and then join the discussion by leaving a comment!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Interracial marriage polling vs. same-sex marriage polling.

» Tennessee’s ban on nondiscrimination ordinances.

Okay, so first I assumed Stefon was gay. Then I backtracked and allowed for a bit more ambiguity about his sexuality, admitting that it wasn’t clear and didn’t define him. Can we at least now admit that he’s got a serious thing for Seth? It’s clear he almost already thinks they’re dating… and he wants to change his diapers. Or maybe the fact that he’s promoting bi-curious beach parties should be a clue! Not that it matters.

I recently attended a Stefon-themed party. Only a few people took the theme to heart, but there was a DJ Baby Bok Choy and a Jewpid in attendance. I hope the creative nonsense just keeps coming. Here’s what Stefon offered up for Mother’s Day!

Seventh Appearance – May 7, 2011

First club: Uuuuuuungh!

» Located in the middle of the West Side highway.
» Bi-curious beach party.
» (Italian) Club owner: Bologna Danza
» Split kicks.
» Pachucos.
» Pile after pile of expired Lunchables.
» Hawaiian cleaning lady that looks like Smokey Robinson.
» Natalie Portman? No. An old Irish black man that we call “Murphy Brown.”
» This Sunday: 2-year-old ultimate fighter “Drooly Lips Jackson.” He’s got fists like little empanadas. And he’s my best friend.

Second club: Spicy! (said in a strange voice)

» Opened in 2017.
» Upper east side of a dumpster.
» 24-hour bitch fest.
» Club owner: Rabbi Jew Diamond Phillips.
» Sandworms.
» Geishas.
» Rock eaters.
» A 7-level course in adult education.
» Kick back in a subway sleeping bag. (“When you’re on the train and you sit between two guys in FUBU jackets.”)

Stefon’s mom is Ms. Stefon and his dad is David Bowie.

How to say thank-you to your mom:

» Take her to central park and bond while flying a human kite. (“Where you tie a string to a midget in a windbreaker and then run through a field.”)

Seth’s Assessment: ”Even though you didn’t help tonight at all, no young party monster should be alone on Mother’s Day. So why don’t you come home with me and meet my mom.”

Dr. Rachel Tudor, a professor of English, Humanities, and Philosophy at SOSU has been denied tenure despite ample support from her colleagues, immediate supervisors, a Faculty Senate resolution with no opposition, and two Faculty Appeals Committee rulings in her favor. No explanation was given for the rejection, and she was blocked from reapplying (as many professors successfully do), again without explanation. At this point, Tudor has exhausted every forum to rectify her situation and her contract with the university will be terminated as of May 31 “without cause.”

All the evidence suggests that Dr. Tudor has been discriminated against for being transgender, primarily by Dr. Douglas McMillan, SOSU’s Vice President for Academic Affairs. When Tudor first transitioned, McMillan request she be terminated because her identity “offends his Baptist beliefs.” Though he could not have her fired, he was successful at requiring she only be allowed to use a single-stall restroom on a different floor from her office. In addition, the dean who oversees Tudor’s department, Dr. Lucretia Scoufos, regularly disrespected Tudor by referring to her with male pronouns. These two individuals had sole authority over the original tenure decision and McMillan was also who blocked her from reapplying.

Despite the way it seems her administrators went out of their way to block her continued employment, Tudor appreciates how others have stood up for her:

I’m completely overwhelmed and gratified so many people have taken initiative and shown their support. It’s amazing to see that people have such integrity.

According to a recent study, nearly half (47 percent) of transgender people have been fired, not hired, or denied promotion for their identity. Oklahoma has no state-level discrimination protections for gender identity, and without a federal ENDA, there is nothing to protect talented, successful employees like Tudor from being terminated without cause. Still, Tudor has taken her case to the Oklahoma Human Rights Commission, the US Department of Education, and the US Equal Employment Opportunity Commission in hopes of intervention. You can support her by signing a petition for her reinstatement.

Glen previously joined the podcast for a discussion about gay-for-pay porn actors, but now he’s back to tell us all about his just-published memoir, The Jack Bank. In it, he chronicles growing up gay in Apartheid South Africa and participating in the revolution that led to sexual orientation becoming a protected class in that nation. He shares an excerpt from the book (despite an interruption by cats) and fields questions from Zack and Peterson not only about the content of the book, but the process of writing it and the importance of memoir as a genre. Order your copy of The Jack Bank today!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Buy The Jack Bank on Amazon.com.

» Visit Glen Retief’s homepage and blog.

» Peterson on being Glen’s partner: Two are Better than One–Art, Love, & Partnership

After a special monologue by Peterson, we discuss BODIES. How do we talk about bodies? What’s that intersexuality thing? What challenges do trans people still face? We lay it all out on the table and just talk about all our hesitations and yet curiosities with bodies, mixed with some recent news.  Take a listen, and then tell us your hangups and joys when it comes to bodies!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Peterson Toscano’s A Musing: Henry Kissinger had a Boob Job!

» Intersex Society of North America

» Abortion not a women’s issue? Feministing: Behind the backlash: what’s so scary about deconstructing the gender binary?

» Malaysia’s got an anti-gay camp for boys, but it’s illegal.

» Texas considers banning trans marriage. But in Texas, different kinds of trans marriages are legal because of Littleton v. Prange.

» PBS’s In The Life highlights transgender Injustice at Every Turn.

This past Wednesday was National Ask An Atheist Day, a campaign by the Secular Student Alliance to encourage young nonbelievers to help their peers dispel mysteries about atheists.

Though I am no longer at an educational institution, I welcomed questions and answered them on Twitter. Most of the questions I got were from friends, some of whom were complaining I wasn’t answering the questions on Facebook where they were asking them. Here are all the answers I offered. Remember, anyone’s free to ask me an atheist-related question anytime! Enjoy!

Q: What’s your back up, man, in case of the Rapture?
A: I’ll finally be able to get some reading done.

Q: Do you believe in the possibility of intelligent energy forces that cannot be seen or detected?
A: No. If they’re so intelligent, they should learn how to communicate.

Q: Why ask #askanatheist questions when the bible has all the answers? I’m just sayin’
A: Someone who thinks the bible has all the answers would have capitalized the b.

Q: WHY DO YOU HAVE NO MORALS?!?!!?
A: Because I’m motivated by Satan, who I definitely believe in, and worship.

Q: If God doesn’t exist, in fact if a loving God doesn’t exist, then why did she invent beer?
A: I believe your pronouns are wrong, John. The Flying Spaghetti Monster’s heave has active beer volcanoes all over.

Q: Were you stung by the scorpion of atheism before or after you were bitten by the serpent of homosexuality?
A: I was the frog who carried the scorpion across the river, the serpent ate my remains, and I was reincarnated as Zack.

Q: When choosing a virgin for your ritual human sacrifices to Satan, does having had oral sex rule that person out?
A: Satan uses the strictest definition of virginity to encourage people to sin more. Oral is totally fair game.

Q: Do you think we’ll ever get to a place where superstition and big brother in the sky don’t rule the populace?
A: Sure, just go to Europe. Their governments even have institutionalized religion and they don’t care. #Paradise

Q: Why do you want to force working class people to labor on Xmas, probably making those little Darwinfish bumperstickers too?
A: All our bumperstickers are homemade, and unless Christmas is on the Sabbath, there’s no excuse not to be working.

Q: Do atheists celebrate Easter?
A: Yes! On Easter Sunday, we sing prettier songs in the shower than we normally sing.

Q: Do you hate Peeps and chocolate bunnies?
A: I’m not particularly fond of peeps, but I like my bunnies dark and hollow, just like most religious dogma.

Q: So are you telling me (the Christian) to stop asking questions?
A: Umm… nope!

Q: Why do atheists always want to shut down debate?!
A: I’ll confess, our use of critical thinking, reasoning, logic, and facts does seem to inhibit further debate.

Q: If I follow you around the internet like this, do I get a coupon for a $500 Walmart gift certificate?
A: I don’t believe in Walmart.

After past discussions of sexual fantasies and even an interview with a porn star, Zack and Peterson decided it was time to actually talk about porn. In particular, the conversation addresses two questions: what were folks’ first experience with porn and what role has porn played in folks’ lives? There is sharing all around, including from a number of commenters on Peterson’s blog. We try to tackle the taboo around acknowledging porn’s existence in our lives and celebrate some of the important benefits it can actually offer us. Please feel free to leave your own comments (even if you disagree) and feel free to share your own story as well!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Peterson’s invitation to discuss: What about porn?

» This week’s erotic poem: How To Make Love to a Trans Person by Gabe Moses

This week, Zack and Peterson welcome to the show Carl Siciliano, founder and executive director of The Ali Forney Center in New York City, which provides shelter for LGBT homeless youth. Since its founding nearly ten years ago, The Ali Forney Center has been on the forefront of addressing the epidemic of homelessness that impacts young LGBT people at absurdly disproportionate rates. Still, in 2011, the center only can offer 57 of the 200 beds available nationwide for the thousands of LGBT youth living on the streets and fights for the funds to provide even that. Carl shares with us the history of the center and the uphill battle to save our community’s young people.

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» This week’s erotic poem: Sublimation Point by Jason Schneiderman.

» Donate to The Ali Forney Center.

» Sign the Change.org petition to protect LGBT homeless youth in NY.

» Read Carl Siciliano’s open letter to Governor Andrew Cuomo.

» Read more stories from LGBT homeless youth in California (PDF).

…

Believe it or not, the American Family Association is (I think—who can tell?) still boycotting Pepsi and Home Depot, and probably a few other companies who have done anything pro-LGBT. I guess that demonstrates that the AFA is all bark, no bite.

But part of the power of a boycott is its visibility. It’s not always just enough to not shop at a certain store or not buy a certain product. For example, I don’t buy peanut butter or eat at Long John Silver’s, but not because I’m boycotting either.

I actually have been boycotting Target, though. And I’ll be honest, I haven’t been the best at it. Sure, I’ve not purchased anything at Target in a good 10 months, but I haven’t been vocal about it, and I certainly haven’t stood in front of Target protesting or written letters to the editor or done any of the things effective boycotters should do. For me, it’s just been a matter of personal principle.

There are a lot of folks in the LGBT community who shrug their shoulders at boycotting Target, and I can appreciate their reluctance. I used to think Target (tar-zhay) was the gay store. It was the anti-Wal-Mart and anybody who was anybody had one of those chic medusa lamps in their dorm room. And Target has long been lauded by HRC as being pro-LGBT. Target’s donations last summer challenged that image, and just because we can understand why Target would support a pro-business PAC doesn’t forgive them for supporting an anti-gay PAC, nor for continuing to support anti-gay candidates since that debacle. Lady Gaga’s calling off of her deal with Target should’ve suggested we haven’t seen the last of the store’s anti-gay antics.

The same goes with Chick-Fil-A. A lot of people really like Chick-Fil-A and don’t want to stop enjoying their tasty chicken. I am fortunate, I suppose, that thanks to geography I’ve never really had Chick-Fil-A. (Ironically, the one time I’ve ever had it was on the campus of a university who ended up not hiring me as a social justice educator because they weren’t “ready” for someone so outspoken about LGBT issues; unsurprisingly, that campus has not had much debate about the presence of a Chick-Fil-A in its campus center.) But plenty of folks will continue to eat there, regardless of how anti-LGBT the company might be. After all, it’s just chicken, right?

But this week, we learned a little bit more about both of these companies and just how anti-LGBT (and duplicitously so) they really are. In the case of Chick-Fil-A, Equality Matters uncovered that Chick-Fil-A is a WHOLE lot more anti-LGBT than we already knew them to be… to the tune of $1.1 million. And that’s money not just going to pro-business right-wing PACs; it’s going directly into the hands of “pro-family” groups who spread lies about LGBT people, defend Christian bullies, and promote harmful ex-gay therapies.

In the case of Target, we learned this week of their lawsuit against Canvass for a Cause, and as I wrote about over on The Wonk Room, they seem to be targeting this group exclusively because of its support of same-sex marriage. While the complaint speaks of CFAC’s harassment of customers, the trial saw no first-hand testimony confirming these allegations. But Target’s own filed complaint (PDF), corroborated by its employee’s testimony, confirms that Target is concerned customers will “never shop at Target again,” “ensure their friends and family do not shop at Target,” and “return everything they bought at Target” because they “believe Target promotes the same sensitive political message” as CFAC.

And while CFAC promotes a number of issues, that particular “sensitive” message is support of gay marriage marriage equality; it’s the only issue mentioned in the whole case from the documents I’ve seen, and they mention it a lot. Daniel Brown, the employee who provides the only testimony hearsay (PDF) about the complaints, said that some customers were “offended” and that “many mothers with children have complained about the sensitive nature” of the messaging.

For decades, the LGBT community has been fighting the meme that queer people are dangerous to children—that we’re going to molest them, recruit them, and teach them all about anal sex while they’re in Kindergarten. And here is a supposed “friend” using that same old stereotype to defend itself in a gratuitous lawsuit against a grassroots group being defended by a volunteer lawyer.

Target doesn’t want to be known as supporting marriage equality because gays are dangerous to children. That’s the takeaway. It’s in the public record.

So the decision comes back to the LGBT community. Do we still patronize these companies—companies that actively demonize us and work against our equality? While my personal answer will continue to be No, I think the larger community needs to have a serious conversation about it.

If the recent poll on marriage equality tells us anything, it’s that we have more allies than ever. If we really wanted to mobilize a huge block of people to support us, I’m betting that we could. The problem, I think, is that we’re too comfortable. We like shopping at Target and eating at Chick-Fil-A and we don’t see their actions as that big of a deal—at least not big enough to change our habits. We want equality, but it almost seems as if many of us would rather wait than make any sacrificial efforts in the meantime.

Maybe AFA is the lesson for us. Maybe boycotts don’t work in 2011, or don’t catch on, or aren’t worth it. Maybe bad press is enough to get the job done, along with a certain quota of negative tweets. Or maybe we’re desensitized to our inequality; we’re willing to tolerate it, such that  it takes something as big and visible as Prop 8 or DADT to really get us off our asses.

But gosh, I’d love to see us try. I’d love to see pickets in front of Targets and Chick-Fil-As (Chicks-Fil-A?). I’d love to see all the big orgs really visibly condemning the corporations and every single blogger actively promoting the boycott. I don’t think we’ve tried it on the national stage, at least not anytime recently. And certainly we saw a lot of success—or at least visibility—from the boycotts of Prop 8 supporters like the Manchester Grand Hyatt in San Diego. So the only thing stopping us is ourselves.

At the end of it all, when we finally get all the equality we deserve in this country, I hope we don’t look back and say, “We could’ve gotten it a lot sooner if we’d just acted more like we wanted it.”

Imposing an every-22-episodes tradition, Zack and Peterson are back this week to continue the open conversation about religion that began in Ep. 22, Reeking of Faith. This week, the conversation revolves around the idea of truth and knowledge and the motivations for good deeds. The goal of these episodes is to generate discussion, so please leave your thoughts and ideas in the comments or on our Facebook page. We were able to play nice this week, so you all should too. Enjoy!

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Go back and listen to Episode 22 – Reeking of Faith

» This week’s possibly-erotic poem: “I Am and I Am Not” by Rumi.

» Sign the petition against the ex-gay therapy iPhone app.

» Read Peterson’s post on “Straight Supremacy.”

» Huffington Post: Congress Considers “In God We Trust”… But Who Is This God?

It’s Zack’s last day in Pennsylvania, and for once, Peterson has come to him! This week, we delve back into the world of ex-gay therapy because Lisa Ling forces us to respond to the Our America exposé of Exodus International on the Oprah Winfrey Network. Almost the entire program was an open platform for ex-gay therapy, with very little challenge or critique or basic reporting about the ineffectiveness and real harm that comes from ex-gay therapy. We address the problems with the special, and invite our special guest Anthony to shed some light on the world of ex-straights, which were not featured at all in the special. ALSO: Zack premieres an original erotic poem! You can read it below.

Here’s some more information about what we talked about this week:

» Read Peterson’s response to the Our America ex-gay special.

» Watch Wayne Besen’s response to the Our America ex-gay special (Truth Wins Out).

» Relisten to our interview with Christine Robinson about how ex-gay therapy = genocide.

» Read Zack’s erotic poem:

Puddlejumper

No words or pleasantries expressed,
An expected tolerance for each other’s
temporary company.
Yet moments after take off,
another occurs:
His knee firmly against mine.

Suddenly, I am consumed with all that he is,
But there is nothing more I need know.
The buzz in my thigh is as crisp as his
military haircut.

And though this 47-minute puddlejumper
Leaves little expectation for tolerating more,
I no longer worry about making my connection.

It’s already been made.

President Obama and the First Lady unveiled the administration’s new plan to help stop bullying in schools nationwide Thursday at the White House Bullying Conference.

About 150 participants, ranging from teachers, professors, parents, community members, organizations, and students took part in the conference at the White House to discuss the bullying crisis.

In remarks to participants from the East Room of the White House, President Obama and the First Lady spoke to the need for communities and schools to work together and take action to combat bullying and harassment and also of the struggles faced by students and families who have suffered and endured challenges. Said the President:

A third of middle school and high school students have reported being bullied during the school year. Almost 3 million students have said they were pushed, shoved, tripped, even spit on. It’s also more likely to affect kids that are seen as different, whether it’s because of the color of their skin, the clothes they wear, the disability they may have, or sexual orientation.

New initiatives from Facebook and MTV were also announced along with the launch of a new resource from the Federal government called Stop Bullying.

As participants broke out into small group sessions to discuss issues related to bullying in schools, one family in attendance spoke of their loss and renewed spirit to fight back against bullying and harassment in schools.

Kirk Smalley and his wife lost their 11-year-old son Ty Field last May when he took his own life after repeatedly being bullying and harassment at school and online by his peers. The sixth grader from Oklahoma had, according to his parents, spoken to his teachers about the bullying but they did not take him seriously. Kirk also says that his wife tried several times to speak with school officials but was met with little assistance. They now speak out against bullying ans harassment and the need for creating safe schools in Oklahoma and around the country.

In an emotional speech to participants, Kirk Smalley said, “These are not statistics or numbers; these are our babies. I cannot begin to tell you with what urgency we need to attack this issue.”

Kirk Smalley and his wife were among four groups of parents with children who had taken their own lives due to bullying and harassment in attendance at the conference. Their presence was a reminder of what bullying and harassment does not only to a youth but also to a family and a community that was both heart-breaking and inspiring.

Mr. Frost, an Elementary School teacher from Arlington, Virgina who attend the conference and was a guest of President Obama, said that in order to combat bullying we need to get back to community schools. He says that he sees challenges daily but the the key is to teach students to respect each other and themselves.

Secretary of Education Arne Duncan gave closing remarks at the end of the day summing up why we need inclusive safe schools and policy:

We need to have a fundamental cultural shift in our schools and communities. We all have an obligation to make our schools safer for all students. No school can be a good school until they are a safe school.

The Department of Education also announced that on the Federal level they would be creating a task force on bullying and a new reporting system that would gather vital statistics on what is happening across the country on this issue. Sec. Duncan also said the Department of Education was committed to making sure that schools and communities had the tools they needed to take action.

But as we move forward talking about bullying and harassment we must make sure to include all youth directly in the discussions on best practices. We must have honest dialog within our local communities and schools about what is going on and especially about what is not working.

It will take all of us to break down the barriers that exist in this debate and create a level playing field—one where all students, all educators, and all families have a voice in creating safe schools and safe spaces. There is not one perfect plan of action to solve this epidemic that effects PreK–College students but a good start is empowering students and care-givers in self-advocacy and support against intolerance.

Yesterday, a memorial service was held for 13-year-old Nicholas Kelo, Jr. of Rittman, OH. The middle school student took his own life after being bullied for joining high school band and was taunted for his perceived sexual orientation. Kelo’s death by suicide is just the latest of countless examples of a problem in our schools that continues to go uninterrupted.

We need to stand up and speakOUT now. This is a crisis in all of our communities and schools nationwide.

Take action and tell your Congress member today to support the Student Non-Discrimination Act (SNDA) and the Safe Schools Improvement Act (SSIA) for inclusive safe schools.