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The 2012 Experiment

2012-01-18T20:44:00.000-08:00

by Raymond David Salas

How are your resolutions, goals, and intentions for the new year going so far?

Are you still going strong? Still on track?

Or have you veered off course a little? Or a lot? Or like many, have you quit altogether?

If you have fallen behind or quit, the problem may not be you.

The problem may actually be the whole process of setting resolutions, goals, and intentions itself.

Wait.

I know what you may be thinking: without setting any resolutions, goals, or intentions, you'll accomplish nothing.

But is that really true?

As last year was coming to an end, I reviewed the highlights, positive events, experiences, and growth from my own life in the past year.

And, I discovered an interesting thing... most of the good things were unexpected. A complete surprise. Unplanned. Spontaneous.

In other words, they were not things on my vision board or list of goals, resolutions, and intentions.

Furthermore, the majority of positive events and experiences were beyond anything I had imagined or visualized for myself.

The 2012 Experiment

This got me thinking...

What if there were more good people, circumstances, and situations that were trying to come into my life but were delayed or blocked by my insisting that my goals, resolutions, and intentions happen instead?

Or on the flip side... what if certain people, circumstances, and situations were trying to leave my life but were delayed or blocked by my insisting that my life stay the same or look a certain way?

Or...what if I really don't know what would make me happy (but only think I do)?

Would would happen if I let it all go?

So, here at the beginning of 2012, I decided to do something different: set no goals, resolutions, or intentions and see what life has in store for me instead.

My only focus will be to do my best to show up to each moment, live it fully, follow my passions and inspiration, have fun, and do whatever excites me.

I'll try to remain open and flexible to whatever the moment brings and go with it.

Sound crazy? Completely nuts? A little bonkers?

Perhaps.

How long can I or will I do it? What will happen?

I don't know. I have no idea. But, I'm looking forward to finding out.

I'm willing to trust that whatever is supposed to happen will because I'm no longer resisting any of it.

Should be fun.

Won't you join me? Do you dare?

"We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us." - Joseph Campbell

"I don’t make plans, because they’re an illusion — you never know what will happen in a year or even six months. You can try to control what happens, but you’ll lose. Things always come up, sometimes good and sometimes bad, that will disrupt plans. Instead, I’ve learned to go with the flow, to not worry about things that disrupt plans but worry about what to do right now. This allows me to take advantage of opportunities to come up that I could never have planned for, to work on things I couldn’t have known about, to make decisions about what’s best right now, not what I planned a few months ago. I don’t force things, but do what comes naturally. And I focus on the present, on being happy now." - Leo Babauta

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2012-01-10T22:28:00.000-08:00

by Raymond David Salas

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How to Actually Enjoy The Holidays This Year

2011-12-04T18:33:00.001-08:00

by Raymond David Salas

The holidays are here.

Are you dreading them?

Do they make you feel depressed?

Are you not looking forward to seeing certain individuals during holiday gatherings?

If you answered "yes" to any or all of these questions, let me ask you this:

"Would you like the holidays to be different for you?"

"Would you like to actually enjoy the holidays for a change?"

If so, follow me...

How to Actually Enjoy The Holidays This Year

Drop your expectations.

The holidays seem to come programmed with many expectations for many people including:

- You're supposed to be happy.

- You're supposed to be with your family.

- You're supposed to be happy being with your family.

- You're supposed to have someone to kiss on New Year's eve (just like in the last scene of "When Harry Met Sally").

- Etc., etc., etc.

Are you ready to drop these and all other expectations?

If you are, try something different this year:

Try doing what YOU really want to do instead. Do what feels good to you.

Why?

Because this is your life, your experiences. Your choice.

You may be thinking: "Isn't that kind of selfish to do what I really want to do?"

The best thing that you have to offer anyone else is your own happiness.

Fake smiles and pretending to be happy when you're not never benefits anyone.

But, what will others think?

Who knows? You have no control over how others choose to react or respond in this or any other situation.

If they do get upset, I know it's not great, but they'll get over it.

Even if they don't understand or agree with you, let go of the need for approval from others and wanting them to agree with you before you can give yourself permission to do something that you really want to do anyways.

The most important thing for you is to be true to yourself. Let whatever you choose to do reflect you and what you're about now, in the present.

Let everyone else do the same...or not. Either way, it's everyone's choice.

Remember, there are no rules here. So, make up your own.

Focus on giving.

One of the greatest and most powerful things about the holidays is that it gives each of us the opportunity to focus on giving to others.

Giving doesn't necessarily mean materialistic or commercial things... or maxing out your credit cards to buy everyone a gift.

During the holidays, many people choose to donate their time, money, and energy to worthy causes, charities, and organizations that they believe in... or sometimes it's simply helping out a neighbor, friend, or family member(s) in need.

When I used to work for a non-profit several years ago, our busiest days of the year (with the most volunteers) were always Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Any time you can make your focus about helping others, the by-product is that you end up feeling good too.

You receive what you give. Every time.

I believe that there is no better way to beat the holiday blues than to focus on giving, serving, and helping others in whatever way that you choose.

I wish you peace and joy this holiday season and in the new year.

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2011-11-14T20:38:00.001-08:00

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How to Overcome Depression

2011-11-07T21:52:00.000-08:00

by Raymond David Salas

Are you depressed?

Do you feel down … and have felt this way for an extended period of time?

Have you tried to get out of your depression but nothing seems to be working?

If you are depressed, there may be a remedy.

Here’s a story of how I found one...

How to Overcome Depression

It may not be obvious and may seem counterintuitive to you, but the best solution that I have found for overcoming depression is: find a way to be of service to others.

Yes, that’s right. Donate your time. Volunteer. Shift your focus away from yourself and your problems, and direct your energy instead to finding a way to add value to others, in whatever way you choose.

I know what you may be thinking: “What a load of B.S.! I have real problems. My life sucks! You don’t understand!”

The truth is...I do understand.

In fact, I can remember hearing Marianne Williamson speak in the early 1990’s on how volunteering was a good way to get out of your head and stop focusing so much on your “stuff,” whenever you’re feeling down or depressed.

I wasn’t depressed at the time, so I could not fully grasp what she was talking about. I could not relate to any of it. After alI, I had a pretty good life at the time.

Then, my downward spiral began. First, I was laid off from my management job (I did not see this one coming). Then, I broke up with my girlfriend of two years. With no money, broke...and alone, I was forced to move out of my nice home in the suburbs of Orange County and into the den of my grandparent’s home. All of this happened within a six month period of time. I was crushed and devastated!

Initially, I responded by trying to figure how the f*** all of this had happened to me. But, I came up with no answers. I didn’t have a clue. More importantly, I had no idea what to do about it.

I did try to help myself by looking for new opportunities and solutions, but I still came up with nothing. My whole world had been turned upside down. Except for the love and support of family and some friends, I had nothing left. My world felt empty. I had no idea where to turn or what to do. I was out of ideas...S.O.L. And, I didn’t care anymore. I was feeling really, really down and totally depressed.

I felt like I was living in quicksand. The harder I tried to get out of my situation, the deeper I sank. Everything felt pointless.

It was then...during one of my darkest hours...that I remembered what Marianne Williamson had said about overcoming depression. So, I decided to start volunteering my time once or twice a week at Project Angel Food (which was founded by Marianne).

What did I have to lose? I didn’t know what else to do anymore. Who knows? Maybe it could help. Maybe it would be therapeutic for me, the balm that my aching heart was searching for. As it turned out, it was exactly that and more...SO MUCH more.

Since I literally had nothing else going on in my life at the time, I fully committed myself to volunteering at Project Angel Food, being of service and helping out in any way possible.

It worked! Slowly, I started to feel better and better, no longer a victim...piece by piece...a little bit at a time.

Shortly thereafter, a miracle happened. After volunteering steadily for about six months, a paid position became available and the supervisor encouraged me to apply. I did and got the job!

A few months later, I was able to move out and rent a place of my own. Shortly after this, I discovered my Energy Healing work...and as they say “the rest is history!”

My life had put itself back together, better than anything I could have ever imagined. More importantly, I was no longer depressed.

By shifting my focus away from my problems and all of my thoughts about how much my life sucked to adding value and helping others, my depression was eventually replaced with a newfound joy, peace, and gratitude from deep within me.

I am so grateful for this valuable lesson on overcoming depression that Marianne Williamson had imparted to me so many years ago.

It literally changed my life!

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