Zenmomma's Garden

Happy Birthday Jon!

2009-07-16T09:20:00.001-07:00

Here's to 50 more!

Hello from Canada!

2009-07-14T15:52:00.001-07:00

We, along with about 10 others families, have invaded our friends on their gorgeous 10 acre property on Victoria Island and the living is good. Well, good for us at least. We'll see if they survive a week of their home being ~~infested~~ filled with unschoolers.

We somehow manged to cram most of our worldly goods into our little Honda to make the trek up north for a week. On our way up we made an overnight stop in Port Angeles and I had many opportunities to try out our new camera.

These guys caught my attention for all the wonderfully tacky and wrong reasons.

We wandered and strolled and hunted and tried without success to find this place. We did so want to try a cock-a-doodle doughnut.

Port Angeles is close to Forks, WA, the setting of the Twilight books. So we saw lots of Twilight paraphernalia.

Including this offer of a vampire kiss.

The ABC's of Aging Gracefully. ZING!

I'm on a boat!
Click this link if you want to hear the BEST. SONG. EVER.
Don't click if you are easily offended by colorful lyrics. But of course if you are easily offended I do wonder why you're here. I'm just sayin'.

More about our week of north of the border unschooling shenanigans later.

Wish You Were Here

2009-07-12T22:28:00.000-07:00

Uh Oh

2009-07-10T08:34:00.000-07:00

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you." ~Rita Mae Brown

United Breaks Guitars

2009-07-09T01:00:00.000-07:00

United Airlines that is. And this guy is ~~kind of~~ really pissed off that they won't pay for damages. Rightly so it seems to me. I only wish I had the talent to spread the word about this kind of negligence in such a creative way. Apparently this is video of #1 of 3. You can read the full story here. I'm thinking Dave Carroll is about to get some internet fame.

The WTF? Report

2009-07-08T16:42:00.001-07:00

I can only assume those are real emu bits they are cooking up there in those stylish sweaters. Any guesses on which "bits" of the emu those might be?

Check out the label, High In-Fidelity Records. What exactly are they selling and who is the target audience I wonder?

Okay, maybe I can shave the baby. But Jesus H. Christ on a razor scooter...
WHY?

P.S. Have you checked Our Daily Bacon lately? Lots more WTF? over there.

Zombies!

2009-07-07T20:41:00.001-07:00

They just don't make 'em like they used to.

Perhaps a little light reading might bring back the civility of the undead.

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies

M80 vs Orange

2009-07-05T18:14:00.000-07:00

Another proud Fourth of July memory. Yes, those are Conor's feet hightailing it out the line of fire. I wasn't there but from what I heard the orange shrapnel was flying. Only a dime-sized piece was ever found. Next up, the brave plastic army men who gave their lives for our amusement.

Video courtesy of Renee and Chris.

And god said...

2009-07-05T17:04:00.000-07:00

..."~~go forth and multiply~~ go fourth and have a barbeque." And we did. And it was good.

It was a pretty hot day yesterday, but we found ways to handle it just fine.

Good friends and plenty of marshmallows make any day special.

So do little cherubs with sparkly star crowns.

When we wanted to cool off, we headed indoors for fun and games. But that didn't last too long.

Soon enough people headed back out for boffers...

and hula hoops...

...and fireworks in the cul-de-sac.
Lots of fireworks.
Enough to damage the finish on a neighbor's car, as I found out from her early this morning.

I think I'm starting to agree with karma about the damn fireworks.

All photos courtesy of Qacei, Carelia and Renee!

Friday Fill-Ins

2009-07-03T17:54:00.000-07:00

1. When I heard that Sarah Palin has resigned as governor of Alaska I shrugged a big whatever.

2. A good massage is the best medicine.

3. It's late, but I'm doing my Friday fill-In anyway.

4. Be good to each other, always.

5. My eyes have seen the absolutely transcendent face of my friend Helen's brand new daughter. Well, I've seen a picture of her anyway. But soon I shall snuggle that punkin' and breathe in her newborn sweetness and you can't stop me.

6. I strongly recommend an iced vanilla latte on a hot day.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to watching Weeds on DVD, tomorrow my plans include a BBQ with my tribe while we attempt to support poor Karma on the toughest day of her year (damn fireworks) and Sunday, I want to stay cool and finish the book I'm reading!

Get your own Friday Fill-Ins.

One howlin' wolf is awesome enough...but three???

2009-06-29T18:36:00.000-07:00

Trust me, you need to check out this magical piece of apparel on amazon.com. It could only be better if the t-shirt was made of velvet. I was thinking that I should get one for Jon's birthday next month, but I'm afraid its powers may be too great and he'll leave me before we get to go to Paris. It's cool and all, but dare I risk it?

Seriously, go read the reviews and see for yourself. There are 1,187 of them. And if you've got a lot of time on your hands, click on the Product Forum where they have discussions. About this shirt. With the wolves. Oh, oh and the pictures! Remember to click on Customer Images.

I love the internet.

Thanks for the link, Courtney!

Friday Fill-Ins

2009-06-26T19:56:00.000-07:00

1. She had a great life and she knew it.

2. Karma, the wonder dog is by my side, always during firecracker season.

3. I know this: MJ makes a kick-ass mix CD! Really. You should ask her (really nicely) to make you one. Her music choices are wonderful and perfectly suited to whomever she's making the mix for. Thanks MJ!

4. It is nearly impossible for me to sit still during the LIFE is Good Conference. I'm running around doing something even when there's nothing left to be done.

5. These words apply to me: Je vais à Paris!

6. I went for a long walk when the sun was shining.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to working on my latest altered book, tomorrow my plans include helping Qacei find a friend who is available to go with her to the first Corvallis PRIDE Parade and Rainbow Rave and Sunday, I want to go for a hike with my hubby!

Get your own Friday Fill-Ins.

Top Ten New Titles for Jon and Kate Plus Eight

2009-06-25T11:00:00.001-07:00

I'm not even going to try to pretend I didn't watch Monday night's painfully sad episode of Jon and Kate Plus Eight. I've already admitted to being a reality show junkie. But just in case you are above all of this, here it is in a nutshell. (Oh and what a NUTshell it is.) Two parents plus two sets of multiples equals one cute idea for a fluff TLC show. (Which is probably exploiting the children but hey, at least they have a nice house and college funds now, right? Not to mention plenty of money left over for the therapy the kids are going to need.)

Anyway, fast forward five years, lots of camera time and millions of dollars later though and you get...a trainwreck. She gets bitchy, he steps out and now they're divorcing. Have I mentioned they have eight very young kids? Sad. And Lord have mercy did we learn nothing from the world's first reality show, An American Family? Cameras in your face do not help an already stressful situation.

But you know me, Laugh at the wonder of it all. Plus, you know, I like to be helpful. So here are my Top Ten new titles for Jon and Kate Plus Eight.

10. Jon and Kate Plus Berate
9. Jon and Kate Plus Unattractive Personality Traits
8. Jon and Kate Plus INFLATEd Egos
7. Jon and Kate Plus "How About a Date, I'm on a Reality Show You Know"
6. Jon and Kate Plus Eight Attorneys
5. Jon and Kate Minus One Mate
4. Jon and Kate Plus Jail Bait?
3. Jon and Kate plus Fate
2. Jon and Kate Plus Eight Kids Who Never Asked For Any of This
1. Jon and Kate Plus Hate

Juvenile, with a side order of misogyny

2009-06-24T14:28:00.000-07:00

Classy, huh? Jon first saw this on Daily Kos today. I found it later by Googling "BK blowjob." I wish it was a joke. It's not. Kind of like that Quizno's Toasty Torpedo ad campaign . I'm sensing a trend here.

When I was in college I wrote a paper for a Psych course about subliminal seduction in advertising. Nothing subliminal here. They're not even bothering to be clever. They're relying on lame puns and heavy-handed innuendo. I think they're going for the drunk frat boy "dude-you-said-blow" level of humor.

Yeah, um, no thanks.

Coming, Goings, Beings and Doings

2009-06-23T12:26:00.000-07:00

Bonjour! Kajitsu! Good day, eh? Hey y'all!

Well it looks like we're going to be racking up the frequent flier miles here at the ~~Gold house~~ maison d'Or. I'm not sure how this all happened, but happen it has. And will. In a matter of weeks and months even. Yes friends, the zen family is hitting the road and taking this party international. More importantly, for the first time we're not all traveling at the same time or even to the same ~~place~~ continent. Gulp. My little family is growing up.

First up on the itinerary is a much anticipated regrouping in Canada for a week of unschooly fun with a rad group of friends.

This will be the one trip we're doing together as a family and I'm planning on cherishing every minute of it. We'll practice our "ehs?" with the hosers as we get our unschooling tank filled from a to zed. (in litres, of course)

Then a few weeks later it's off to Not Back To School Camp for Qacei and Burning Man for Conor. Oh yeah, my baby's going to Burning Man!

Both events have been described as life changing, albeit for slightly different reasons. I have to admit that I'm actually thinking it's too bad they don't go to school. Because I'm pretty sure they would each have some interesting content for a "What I did on my Summer Vacation" essay.

As we head into the fall, Qacei will be flying solo (for the first time!) with her friends MJ and Chloe to Atlanta. From there they head to North Carolina to hang out on the beach with even more unschoolers. Look out y'all, the girls are a comin'!

In early November Conor is also heading off without the family, but he's flying in the other direction. He'll be joining a half dozen other unschoolers on a three week tour of Japan! They start in Tokyo and will travel by rail throughout the country. That is going to be an adventure for sure. I'm intimidated just looking at all those people in Tokyo. And I grew up in New York!

But Conor knows much more about Japan and Japanese culture than I do. I'm ~~pretty sure~~ positive he will have an amazing experience.

The final bit of traveling news concerns Jon and I and our upcoming 25th anniversary. Yes that's right, 25! (aka we're old) It's a big one and should be celebrated, right? I mean we should give ourselves a vacation alone every now and then, right? Let's see, the last one was in 1987. Hmmmm, I think we're just about due to get away again.

So.....we toyed with going to the aforementioned Beach Unschoolers Gathering in NC. (We do love being surrounded by friends, but maybe this should be a couple thing, huh?) We toyed with going to Hawaii or Vegas or Catalina Island. (Beaches? Gambling? More beaches?) We toyed with doing nothing. (Nope, we do enough of that already.) In the end we picked...

drumroll please...

thanks, Keith

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PARIS!
Magnificent. Romantic. Full of ~~itself~~ culture and brimming with art, music and beauty. The land of crusty ~~French~~ bread and full fat yogurt. Historic monuments and breathtaking museums.

Here's the Google Earth street view shot of our hotel.

Très magnifique, no?

Works for me...

2009-06-17T23:07:00.001-07:00

Don't you just love milestones?

2009-06-15T15:37:00.001-07:00

~~Even~~ Especially the meaningless ones.

See that Neo-counter over there on the sidebar? I know what you're probably thinking, but it has NOTHING to do with Keanu Reeves or the Matrix. It should though, right? I mean c'mon...Neo.

But no, it's just to keep track of people who tip toe through my garden. And amazingly, it says that there have been 50,000 visits to the garden since its creation. Mostly 2 second drive-bys no doubt. But ya gotta wonder what the folks in Estonia or Malta make of all this if they do take a moment to look around. I'm thinking they'll come back for the bacon.

Stop me before I glue again

2009-06-14T17:57:00.001-07:00

No, don't actually try to stop me because I'm having a ball. But I must admit I'm being somewhat consumed with the whole process of collage theses days. I've been cutting and gluing and rearranging and gluing and altering and gluing and antiquing and gluing. And gluing. And gluing. And...

Whoa dude, glue.

Where was I? Right, collage.

There are other aspects of collage that I also find ~~to be totally tripping~~ thoroughly enjoyable. First, there are the images. I love to work with vintage images, portraits mostly. Luckily there are entire websites devoted to collecting such images and they're meant to be shared. The best site I've found so far is art-e-zine. But there are so many more. So. Many. More. Needless to say (but I will anyway) I've been online quite a bit in my quest to find just the right ones. And oh have I found some beauties. Literally.

Take this amazing portrait from the flapper era. Isn't she lovely? I put her in this collage I made for Diana as a housewarming gift.

It's called Sweet Painted Ladies and that particular sweet lady is up in the top window. Click on the picture for a slightly closer view of the whole gang.

I also love hunting around for ~~old junk~~ vintage items and ephemera. Jon and I went to some thrift and antique stores this weekend and I found lovely bits of vintage lace, tacky costume jewelry, rusted nuts and bolts, and a cool clock to take apart for use in some Steampunk inspired art. Here's one little piece I already started. Maybe she's even finished. I haven't quite decided yet. Art is like that.

Obviously it was a dark and stormy night and some serious secrets were unleashed. I do believe that's Mitzi in there, getting into mischief. She can be like that sometimes. Gotta watch her.

I've got a lot more ideas and a few more pieces in process. I won't bore you all with every single one, but I'm liking this little note card a lot so I'll end with it. It's simple and to the point.

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.
~Lao Tsu

Everyone Is Beautiful

2009-06-12T22:38:00.000-07:00

I think this video is just lovely. So is the post by The Bloggess that led me to it. It all started with the book Everyone Is Beautiful by Katherine Center. (Which by the way has just been added to my summer reading list.) You can check out the first chapter here.

Friday Fill-Ins

2009-06-12T12:55:00.000-07:00

1. I grew up thinking there was only one right answer. I've come to discover that it all depends on what question you're asking.

2. Facebook was the last website I was at before coming here. It's taking over the world, you know.

3. Why don't you create something beautiful today?

4. A nice mug of kava tea in the evening helps me relax. Oh yeah, it helps me relax reaaaaal good.

5. Thanks for the connections. I appreciate each of you more than you can ever know.

6. A life with too many "shoulds" is very off-putting to me.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to working on some new collage pieces, tomorrow my plans include nothing in particular and Sunday, I want to do more of the same!

Get your own Friday Fill-Ins.

Best line I've read all week...

2009-06-07T20:34:00.001-07:00

From Frank on Singularity. In answer to a question on a [lame] Homeschool Meme:

13. One subject you didn’t get to this week:

Frank replied: "I always use a subject with my verbs. Otherwise, they get lonely. Verbs are just so fucking needy."

Amen to that!

Mitzi Returns!

2009-06-07T19:58:00.001-07:00

She's still a work in progress,
but aren't we all?

I'm calling this one She's A Star. I hope to get a better picture where the colors aren't so washed out. But you get the idea. It feels good to make art again!

Don't Forget

2009-06-06T11:00:00.000-07:00

Our Daily Bacon

Friday Fill-Ins

2009-06-05T13:09:00.000-07:00

1. "One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night." ~ Margaret Mead

2. My favorite thing for dinner lately has been a bowl of Cheerios with a banana. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day after all.

3. Karma says, "bark! bark! bark! Where are you going? Bark! Bark! Bark! Can I come too? Bark! Bark! Bark! Who's at the door? Bark! Bark! Bark! Is it time to eat? Bark! Bark! Bark! Wanna play? Bark! Bark! Bark! Wanna rub my belly? Bark! Bark! Bark!"

Karma the wonder dog

4. A nice long walk has been the key to keeping me sane.

5. I love when my friends have some good news to share.

6. When all is said and done, shut up about it already.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to NOT planning a conference, tomorrow my plans include creating some art and Sunday, I want to create some more!

Get your own Friday Fill-Ins.

Too hoffin' awesome for words

2009-06-05T12:57:00.000-07:00

Forget the cowbell. We need more Hoff!

Click to Hoffify: