Zoe Alexander - Bio-energy therapy practitioner http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog Thu, 29 Mar 2012 09:21:27 PM Thu, 29 Mar 2012 09:21:27 PM In order to have fulfilling relationships you need to adhere to one rule over any other: when together, BE together. This sounds simple and it is. Many people live in a world constantly absorbed by the chatter of mental thinking. Many aren't even aware of this. Fulfilling relationships are difficult in this case because, despite how often you are physically together, when you are engaged in thinking you are energetically apart. Your partner cannot enter into your mental space and share it with you and neither can you theirs. Naturally this means clear verbal communciation with oneanother is important in order to be understood. The problem here is that often, when life and the mind are busy, communcation may seem clear to you, but not to your partner. This is when assumptions start to be made and all shared reality with another disappears. An example I heard recently concerned a failing relationship. When asked why the relationship was nolonger fulfilling, the lady replied that the man wasn't caring for her. I asked for an example. She said that when she came home after a very busy day she had to empty the dishwasher. When asked had she specifically asked him to empty the dishwasher, the answer was no. He was just expected to know. This is one common example of a potential relationship breaking assumption established by a busy life merging with an even busier mind guaranteed to impair clear communication. Unclear meaning, in this case over the dishwasher, is the natural outcome of two people who have stopped BEing together. If you would like to have more fulfilling relationships, spend time BEing with people, not just in body but in mind and presence. If this is hard for you, and it is for millions of people, a good place to start is by practicing acknowledging your senses. Really look and listen you your partner with as open a heart as you can manage. Really look, smell and taste your meal if you are eating or use your senses to really perceive the environment you are sharing with another. Focusing on your senses will help bring you out of your mind and into the shared environment. It may not get rid of your mental busy-ness but it does help you move into a reality that is sharable. Speaking about what you see, hear, taste and feel also gives you a shared topic you can discuss with another. The other person may not always agree with your particular sensory likes and dislikes, but you are together and able to move more easitly into  BEingness. This is in direct opposition to the times you might find yourself, or the person you are with, disappear into the mind, leaving you physically together but energetically apart and feeling unfulfilled. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Fulfilling_Relationships F15A989E02AF97CF9B9FBC0986C7FCA5 Fri, 30 Mar 2012 12:00:00 PM A person came to consult with me who said she needed help. Her life was busy, her overall health was letting her down, she had 'so much on' and she didn't know where to start. Nothing, even her relationships with her loving family, were bringing her any joy. She spoke at length about what wasn't right and with fifteen minutes left before our time was up, she left. I'm not talking physically-she still sat for those last fifteen minutes- but mentally and therefore energetically. We discussed this. She said she had so much to do after our time and was shocked to know I knew she had left the building without leaving the room. This lovely lady was lucky that her health had started to deteriorate. I say 'lucky' as that was the prompt for her to pause and add 'finding help' to her never ending busy-ness that she needed. She had been living this way for years. How many others, she wondered, also felt her leave them whilst remaining in their presence? Sometimes we need a gentle nudge, at other times a neon flashing sign, before we pause and recognize we need help. If you took time to pause today, where might you benefit from help? Rebalancing your inner life? Organising your outer life? Creating more fulfilling relationships? Being able to be more present? Wherever you are right now, why not pause and ask a little question that can help open a life of deeper happiness. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Leaving_the_Building_Without_Leaving_the_Room FE5BD890697F82560D3AFF748918EEF6 Mon, 05 Mar 2012 05:15:00 PM Do you allow yourself to call and/or make a connection with another without having met them? I have a friend who is lonely and wishes she knew more people who understood her; she's a psychic and a healer and so lives in a world where her reality differs from the majority of people around her. Many people who know and love her have suggested friends of theirs that she could arrange to meet. Yet despite her loneliness and longing for like minded friends, she doesn't make the calls. You may not be a lonely psychic, but would you have the faith to reach out and into a potential that you'd like? Some people call the ability to reach out confidence, faith, gambling or just scary. Regardless of how you perceive it, taking a chance on another is often the only way to feel better about yourself and about life. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Taking_A_Chance_With_Another 7CDAA72FA22E25A3BAAB63F7D823D127 Mon, 27 Feb 2012 07:53:00 PM A friend of mine has recently noticed an irony in her life. She's been pushing herself. She's pushed herself at work so she can earn more money. She's pushed herself at studying, so she can change jobs, and ultimately earn more money. She's pushed herself with exercise so she can stay slim and fight a growing waistline. She feels that she matters and that all of her goals and effort are the right thing for her to do. There's only one problem: her health. She agrees she's suffering. She can smile at the irony that all her effort is create a 'better' life, but right now it's worse. As she pushes towards her goals she sickens. She's unsure of what to do. So she went to the doctor. The doctor gave her tablets that made things worse. She cannot afford other forms of private healthcare. Today and tomorrow she is resting. The following day is her exam. Wanting to be who you are is a fabulous thing. Working to better your life is a fabulous thing. Trading your health today for the potential in tomorrow is not. There's fine line to walk between living today, in the now where your energy can only ever be, and investing yourself in a future that you don't inhabit yet, and that fine line is different for every individual. So let's ask you: where are you today? In the here and now? Or are you absorbed in the work and cares of your tomorrow. Are you managing to stay balanced on your own fine line? http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=How_Is_Your_Fine_Line? 4FD45969C55616EE551E3A2EAA5ABBE9 Mon, 13 Feb 2012 03:05:00 PM Life is an evolving interplay of what we want, what we don't, what we expect and what happens unexpectedly. Your system is designed to respond in harmony to the events and feelings in your life as they enfold. This means that as life continues, you will experience times when you want to sing, dance, work hard, cry and even pray. Giving yourself permission to experience the song, the dance, work, tears and even prayer, is crucial if you are to maintain a healthy, balanced energy system. Sometimes that's not what we do: instead we judge ourselves, affirm what we should be doing or feeling rather than what really is. Unfortunately this has the effect of throwing our system into further chaos.  If you wish to have a strong and balanced energy system, take time to listen to yourself, admit how you really feel about life as it is in this moment. Then, however you feel, give that to yourself: song, dance, work, tears, etc, it really doesn't matter. What really matters is that you value yourself and so bring yourself back into energetic harmony as well as you can. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Time_to_Pray A51D2F79E6C385FA9AD8119B4D442BCA Mon, 06 Feb 2012 04:36:00 PM Sometimes it feels as if you are carrying heavy weights; heavy burdens. Energetically you begin to feel heavy, sluggish, serious. Regardless what it is that is happening that makes you feel heavy or burdened, it is in your best interest to put the burden down. This does not mean take the issue, relationship or event lightly. Nor does it mean hide from your reality and your responsibility. What it does mean is try to let it be. Now this isn't always easy- heaviness can bring with it a feeling of impending negativity, dread or doom that can feel impossible to mentally escape from. So why would you want to let the heaviness be? Because if you don't, it will zap your energies, your vitality and your mind/body/spirit's ability to maintain personal balance. It is during difficult times when it is most helpful to have energy to cope, think clearly, plan and be able to see and believe that there's light at the end of the tunnel. So how do you let it be? Recognise that the situation may be heavy and serious and life may feel like it's heading in a wrong/bad direction, and ask yourself which you would fair better? A lighter, clearer thinking you? Or a more serious, burdened you? The reality will still be the same no matter which you you bring to it. The experience, however, is totally different... http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Heavy_Weights F40548ECE57967529EFED6817C8FD401 Mon, 23 Jan 2012 04:26:00 PM I'm a great believer in having the ability to laugh. Laughing releases tense and nervous energy from the body, thus allowing you to restore to balance and once again feel good. I was in a group and somebody said that they wish they could have it in a bottle; her friend said they've done that and called it champagne- it's just unfortunate it is only healthy to drink it in moderation... However it is possible to attune yourself to being able to partake in a giggle or two. How do you do this? First of all focus your energy: you do this by deciding that you would like, or in fact, need a good giggle. Then you look for it. Once you have made the decision to giggle, life gives amazing opportunities to laugh and lose your seriousness. Giggle juice is freely available and can be consumed in large quantities, should you wish. Instead of working towards a hangover, the more you drink the giggle stuff the more you will feel better, lighter and be able to think straighter in the morning. Life is great when your spirits are lifted but you don't need to wait for life to give you something to laugh about. By deciding you're going to drink it,  you will look for it and you will find it, in the most surprising and mundane of places. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Giggle_Juice F27B079EE6B7DEC94BB34C67EA40CA53 Mon, 16 Jan 2012 04:23:00 PM Happy 2012!  Did you make a decision on what you would like this year to hold for you? I read that the top 3 New Years resolutions were: 1. Weight loss 2. Savings plan 3. Improve health From an energy perspective wanting to improve your life can be a great thing- the desire to feel better raises your vibtration and activates all of your centres as you are inspired, make a plan and take action towards it. However it's important to be aware of the emotional energy that may have led to your decision...For example if you decided, like many people,  you wanted to lose weight, you most likely will have made that decision from one of two perspectives; either loving yourself and wanting the very best for your health and well being or from being deeply unhappy with your physical appearance which you are identifying with as 'bad' or 'wrong'. Losing weight from the emotional and energetic afirmation of  'loving myself' floods the energy system with self love. Losing weight from the emotional and energetic affirmation of 'disliking myself' floods the energy system with self dislike, even self hate. The top three resolutions may not apply to your 2012 but the energy that your perspectives brings to what you did chose, does. Did you make your choice as an affirmation of self love? Or self dislike?  Self love affirms life, promotes kindness and compassion and this helps your health and self worth. Self dislike moves you in the opposite direction. Remembering that like attracts like, if you are motivated by self dislike you may go on to achieve your goal (it will feel like an uphill struggle) but once you have arrived you will discover more self dislike. We see and read examples of this everyday in the press; for example the celebrities we look at who yoyo diet or choose another, then another, then another cosmetic procedure. So whatever you wish for this year, affirm your choice with love. Working with love is like swimming with the current. This means you are more likely to get to where you want to go. You will feel better for it and enjoy the journey along the way. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=A_New_Year EF0EFD5C9632290C6106695EBE477FD8 Tue, 03 Jan 2012 10:55:00 AM The time between Christmas and New Year is the perfect time to reflect on you, your life and the year that is nearly over.  What has 2011 meant to you? What did you accomplish that you're proud of? What would you like to experience during 2012? Time to reflect and review gives you perspective and greater insight. This greater clarity can then be utilised to to energetically sow seeds or physically plan your 2012 according to your desires. So would would you like 2012 to give you? http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Time_for_Reflection 5E8F52739DE8CC811B5B7D5AE0EA6C6C Fri, 30 Dec 2011 05:08:00 PM What do you do when you have the cold? Some people rest and believe they should stay home, conscious of needing to heal as well as keeping the cold to themselves. Others reach for the medicine cabinet, take drugs and 'soldier on'.  Next time you have the cold, stop and ask yourself what is best for you in this instance: to stay at home and rest or to push through. By taking the time to ask yourself you will help create a stronger mind-body connection. This will serve you in every aspect of life beyond having and healing from a cold. Taking the time to connect to yourself, and act on it, affirms the most powerful belief you can ever have whilst living on this earth: I matter, just as I am. A powerful lesson to learn courtesy of the common cold. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Having_A_Cold 35A862AA098D3158B0D2AE1FFFF85E33 Mon, 05 Dec 2011 03:50:00 PM Listening well isn't always easy. Not everyone masters it, or even desires it. To do it properly requires a quiet inner mind, a willingness to honestly hear another, and a decision to rest the body physically as well as patience to suspend yourself to hear another. How well do you listen? Which parts of the above are easier or harder for you? What do you think would change for you if you were able to listen and hear others more clearly? Take time to listen to your own answers on this. Perhaps becoming a better listener will open up your heart as well as your mind. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Questions_on_Listening D780AA64A494EBD807F4FAB36913BB04 Mon, 28 Nov 2011 03:37:00 PM Turning lemons into lemonades- this is something a lot of my Australian clients talk about: how to turn something bad into something good.  Is there something in your life that tastes like a lemon? Have you considered finding a way to turn it into lemonade? Whatever is bothering you today, perhaps you could perceive it as a lemon. Perhaps you could use your creative mind to find a way to make lemonade from it. Some people are better at making lemonade than others. Really it is a matter of habit; the more you switch your perception the easier it becomes. So if you're fed up with your lemon(s) try making some lemonade- you'll feel better for it. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Lemons_into_Lemonades FCCF6311C6E89A236CDD1A10FFF0E056 Fri, 25 Nov 2011 03:28:00 PM Today someone said that they wanted to find a way to create their own truth; to find their own reality. Putting the words, "create" with "the truth" together seems strange: the truth is just the truth, isn't it? Many people are living a life where they honestly believe they can create their own version of "the truth". If I don't think about it, if I pretend enough, if I affirm it often enough, if I just try harder, if I just try less hard, if I lose weight, earn more money, be a nicer person, etc, then my truth will be the one I want. Then I'll accept it. Unfortunately life just isn't like that and so much personal energy is lost when you fight your own reality, your own truth. Your point of power comes from accepting your own truth. That doesn't mean you like it. However it's only after you accept your reality, your truth, that you are able to successfully create change in your life. If you try and change something before you accept it you create warfare with yourself. Waging war with the truth only makes you and your life a lie as only a lie opposes a truth. So if you feel that you would like to find the truth of something, start by asking yourself how you truly feel about it. Then accept it, liking it or not, as your current reality in your life. Once you can accept it, ask yourself if a change is needed. If it is, understand your starting point and make a plan for how change can effectively and supportively be implemented. Put another way, open your eyes to your true feelings and love yourself into a better way of feeling and better feeling reality. If you don't you will spend your time and personal enegy fighting an invisible enemy with your eyes shut, and that's a truth no-one wants. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Creating_the_Truth A30817C0B0C2F93A08AECDC9CDDBF55B Mon, 14 Nov 2011 05:22:00 PM You would think that being yourself would be the easiest thing in the world: after all it's physically impossible to be anyone else. However do you feel like you can be yourself? Anytime? Sometime? Most of the time? Always? Life never waits- the earth continues to move round the sun and day turns into night. Flowers bud, blossom, bloom and fade. At all stages  'life' is expressing itself in every moment, at it's best and at it's worst, moving in and out of differing phases. We are part of 'life' and therefore we are designed to flow with life, moving in and out of phases ourselves. There's an effortless ease to it, a grace. But only if you are able to be yourself, at all times. Even being a version of yourself takes you out of the flow of life. The effortlessness goes and instead you find yourself in a day, a week, a month, a year of feeling buffeted from one event in your life into the next as if life was a dodgem car or roller coaster ride at the fairground. If you would like life to be easier, more fluid, more graceful, try being more of yourself. Being yourself creates miracles in your life: it reconnects you to the force that creates stars, plants and flowers of every colour and variety and the feeling of true love. Practically start by allowing yourself to explore aspects of yourself that you are aware you hide. Try something you have secretly wanted to try for years. Start becoming more honest with those around you. Start taking the time to regularly ask yourself for your truth on a situation, event or feeling and listen. Get professional help and support if you need it. In short: Be yourself. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Being_Yourself F534CE21D77C68A5E9819B8522EC3FBF Wed, 09 Nov 2011 05:31:00 PM Are you feeling tired today? If so, have you taken time to ask yourself why? Sometimes we're tired because we were up late or up early. Other times we're tired for other, deeper reasons. If you're tired today take the time to ask yourself why. Listen to the answer. Tiredness talks and sometimes it can have interesting things to say. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Tiredness_Talks 4F5F422F963F6AE8C6E7409FB13B2EDA Fri, 04 Nov 2011 02:21:00 PM Sometimes it feels as if we're not really here. Where are we? Who knows- just not here. If this is how you feel today, take time to ground yourself and bring yourself back on-line. How do you do that? Stop whatever you're doing, breathe deeply and begin to focus on the feelings inside the body. How does your body feel? Tense? Tired? Weak? Strong? Take another breathe. Then mentally bring your attention into your emotions. How are you? Take time with this one. Anxious? Fearful? Floaty? Take another breathe. Use your eyes now to focus on your environment. Whatever you are looking at, wherever you are, look around you and affirm: here I am, here, today, now. Take another breathe and and try putting all of this together. Whilst looking and engaging your environment, try and feel how your body feels; then how your emotions feel.  Your energy system will shift; you will bring yourself back on-line. You'll feel better. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Being_Off-line 745B1F7C3F5A39C27F946A140B88DB0F Mon, 24 Oct 2011 06:14:00 PM Today is here and we're both in it. What's your message for it? Do you have one? Or will you wait and see what they day brings you? You have a choice: you can decide what kind of day to have today and have it- at least mostly. I'm choosing to have a fun day today. I chose that because it feels good and honestly feels better than everything else I can decide upon. I also didn't sleep well last night. I know that if I don't set an intention then I'll feel tired all day and I don't want that. This decision has focused my energy and means I'll take this decision/intention into everything I do today. Now something may happen that's not particularly fun, or it may not. Some people do not wish to set an intention for their day; they feel it's not how life works and that it's more realistic to respond to life's ups and downs or they're fearful that it won't work out for them. What they don't realise is that they have just made a decision to not set an intention which means they take their morning emotional and mental default position into their day. This is great if their dreams were wonderful and not so great if they woke feeling fearful, anxious or stressed.  You don't need to be a passenger in your own life, in this today. Why not decide what you want from today and make a decision to have it. You will or you won't ultimately get it as this is life and unexpected things do happen. Making a decision puts you into the drivers seat of life and out of the passenger side. It also moves your waking emotion and mental default state to your chosen state and your intention sets this state energetically. Life is random. It's also miraculous. It contains all of everything and everything of nothing. So what would you like from today? I'm choosing some fun... http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=What's_Your_Message_For_Today? 3191B1EA148CDDA4EFF46E58B6AD495B Tue, 18 Oct 2011 11:34:00 AM When you're asked, "How are you?" what do you say? Give a polite answer? Your standard answer? Have you ever really taken the time to ask and listen to your answer? Today I'm not asking about your body but the 'you' that lives inside the body. How are you? Today try taking time to listen to that answer and not sweep yourself under the carpet. You matter. More than anything you can do, achieve or have. By learning to ask and listen you will train yourself to give and receive self love and self esteem, even when the answer maybe "terrible". You matter regardless of how you feel or what you are thinking about. You matter. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=How_are_you_today? EB7EDD81AF9146EA0EF9C9397ECE0BC4 Mon, 10 Oct 2011 04:56:00 PM How's life? Do you answer that with a description of your job, your family, 'to do' list? It's your relationship with yourself that's the cornerstone of living a �real� life and experiencing the happiness that is within. If your life seems to revolve around the well being of only one or two aspects of your life- job, a partner, no partner, leisure activities, family, friends, bank account balances-  then you are missing one very big part: yourself. You are the common denominator throughout everything in your life. The happier you are, the happier you will experience the outer manifestations of your life- the job, partner, no partner, leisure activities, family, friends, bank account balances. You flow into every aspect of your life. So if something isn't working take time to establish why then take action. Not only will you will be a happier person as a result so the other outer manifestations of your life will feel better too. Here's to a happy life for all! http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=How's_Your_Life? B49722E6DC0AEBA7AA1553FDF39209F0 Mon, 26 Sep 2011 04:39:00 PM Loving your body- a lot has been written about and spoken about on this subject. Do you love your body? Respect it's needs and make choices to honour those needs? Or do you tell it what it needs: how it should look, how it should feel, what it should be able to cope with and impose those mental opinions onto your body? Being able to love your body requires you firstly to be in it; to feel it, to take time to listen to it, to give it what it needs. Your body, like mine, is a miraculous vehicle that facilitates your life on this planet. It wasn't designed to eat junk food and to do no exercise. You probably know this and understand that this is not a way to love your body. Equally, however, dictating how your body should and shouldn't be (no matter how much you feed it superfoods and give it exercise) is not love and respect either. Often it's well meaning, self imposed warfare that creates an even greater schism between you and your body. To truly love your body, take time to feel how it feels. This is easy to do. Quieten the mind, and ask it how it is- become aware of parts of it and then it in its entirety. Your body communicates it's needs via feelings and/or spontaneous thoughts: the urge for water, a breath of fresh air, a run or a rest. Giving your body what it needs is loving your body. In return you get to feel the love your body has for the experience of living and this feels good. If you do not listen to it, it will begin to shout, and when it does you will experience this via mental, emotional and physical symptoms. No-one wants that. So to love your body firstly be in it. Secondly give it what it needs. It's not a machine that keep going without being nurtured and nor are you. So whether you have symptoms or not, stop and listen to your body today. If you honestly feel and/or believe that you cannot connect to your body get professional help that will help you open up the channels for self dialogue. Greater levels of harmony between body, mind and spirit, will be your result. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Loving_Your_Body E783932CE59CC5DA6F38DB017C0A69D9 Wed, 21 Sep 2011 04:18:00 PM When was the last time you gave yourself time to think? Time to feel like you can breathe again? Many people experience life as one big to do list and they are at the bottom. Taking time for yourself is a wonderful way to affirm to you and to the Universe that you matter. It helps your energy system rebalance and builds up your stores of self worth and self love. Those are the stores that help you feel good in day to day life and can help keep you afloat in trying times. So today take time for you- to think and to breathe and to build up those life affirming feel good stores. No matter what's on today's list, that 5, 10, 30 minutes you give to yourself really matters.  http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Time_to_Think,_Time_to_Breathe 1ACCD3032E742D45318F8A36BDD85D90 Mon, 12 Sep 2011 03:35:00 PM That feeling that everything is going your way- it feels great! What do you call it? Luck? Fate? Destiny? Co-incidence? Karma? Fabulous? You'd like more it it, right? Most people would. The thing with everything going your way is that it won't last long. The reason isn't unluck, fate, destiny; it's just life. Life is sometimes good, sometimes bad. It moves with you, you with it, and sometimes it feels good and sometimes bad. My intention is not to burst your balloon or rain on your parade if you're currently riding a wave (nor to over do analogies...). Trying to make beautiful moments, good times, emotional and spiritual highs last, is pointless. It negates the flow of life. If you do try, the inevitable rain cloud might turn into a storm. Now that's something I know you don't want... So enjoy the moment, allow yourself to filled with whatever it brings and let the next moment arrive with whatever life brings to it. Life, like your energy system, is about flow and the more you accept and allow flow, the happier and more harmonious you and life will be. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=When_Everything's_Going_Your_Way 8DD644E1947F69AE821DD5ED134001E3 Mon, 05 Sep 2011 05:05:00 PM What do you do when you feel shaky on the inside? I'm not speaking about physical withdrawals- I'm meaning the unbalancing and often difficult to deal with emotional, energetic or spiritual quiver. The one that leaves you not quite here, not quite there, not quite anywhere except in a place of vulnerability and often accident prone.  We all suffer from this from time to time. Sometimes it is in response to an event or interaction and sometimes for no apparent reason at all.  Ask yourself- do you know what brings you back down to ground and into the here and now? If you're not sure take a few minutes to think about it. If nothing springs to mind think about what those around you do- meditate, dance, scream, run, garden, eat, drink? What might work for you?  We are not meant to suffer. Practically that means there is always a road out of whatever you are experiencing. Understanding yours, in advance, will help you rebalance more quickly and come back to right where you need to be: in your body in the here and now and a lot better off for it. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Dealing_with_the_Quiver 711C0615AC0CA65C183B50F69AB4C1A0 Sun, 28 Aug 2011 04:30:00 PM Many people feel tired. Today, if are tired, stop and think about what you might be tired off. Making poor eating habits or staying up too late are obvious causes of physical tiredness. Sometimes there can be underlying metaphysical causes too. Could you be tired in other ways? A job that is emotionally draining? Endlessly clearing up after the family without thanks? Never quite getting enough done to justify 'me' time? Take time to communicate with yourself and establish what's really going on inside. You never know, what you might find might liberate greater levels of energy than you ever could have imagined. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Being_Tired CD275987C4896E8EF757B5703C624D4F Tue, 23 Aug 2011 04:20:00 PM How well are you working? Do you ever take time to evaluate how well you are working? Take a few moments to think about how well you're working: Physically? Mentally? Emotionally? Spiritually? What could you do to work better? Capture whatever comes to mind, however seemingly random.  Your well being depends on harmony between the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual aspects of yourself. Positively impacting one impacts them all. The answers are always inside. Taking time to ask, to listen and then to implement, may give you the keys you've been waiting for.  http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Working_Well? 216A2604E6853706388D6B80528C5D90 Mon, 15 Aug 2011 02:51:00 PM Recently a friend of mine has been sick. Not for 1 day or 1 week but months. She's found that friends and family call and express best wishes and offers of help at first but fall away after several weeks. Everyone is busy after all. She knows this as she's been this person herself. One of her friends gave her a gift of a book which has a section for her to read everyday. She loves it. Everyday she opens her book and reads her section and thinks about her friend lovingly. This raises her spirits and brings comfort and support. Knowing that, the book giving friend feels good too. If you have a friend or family member that is unwell, and has been for a while, you will be thinking about them and wishing them well. You may not have the time to call or pop in and see them as much as you like. You may worry and/or carry guilt about this. Rather than lower your own spirits with guilt and worry, why not give both of you a gift. Think about giving a gift that gives your best wishes even when you can't. It could be a book, batch cooked meals for their freezer, daily texts or emails, a multivitamin- it could be anything. The best gifts are expressions of love and understanding that take form in objects, actions or gestures. The best gifts give to both the recipient and the giver. Take the time to think about what you can do within the confines of your own circumstances. Act on it. You'll give your loved one a gift, you will feel good so both of you will benefit. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Giving_a_Gift_ 830DE638B2B047665167544F2D3F932F Mon, 08 Aug 2011 02:51:00 PM When was the last time you did something for you? Studied a subject? Walked on the beach? Lay on the floor listening to your favourite music? The level of happiness we experience is directly proportional to our ability to give ourselves that which makes us happy. So if you would like to feel happier, do something for yourself today. Action is a the most powerful affirmation we can make. What can you act on today? http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Acting_for_Happiness 94E3DBFE833EAA49DFA71C2868CB0BB7 Mon, 01 Aug 2011 02:51:00 PM What do you do if someone tells you you're wrong when you think you're right? Do you defend your position? Agree with the other person to keep the peace? Agree to disagree? Do you consider the consequences to you and the other person before you respond? Sometimes the need to be 'right' forces you to prove that the other is 'wrong'. Sometimes keeping the peace means you can lose the ability to speak up for yourself. The one person who is always impacted is you- whether you are in the right or in the the wrong. It's worthwhile just now to stop and ask yourself how you react when someone says to you, "You're wrong". Do you immediately respond with a desire to prove you're right, or immediately wish the subject would change? Interestingly the effects on you are the same however you have responded- you have become imbalanced and need to change your reality to feel good again. Deep down you always know whether you are right or wrong. Admitting your truth to yourself strengthens your relationship to self, and a strong relationship to self makes it possible to have strong, truthful relationships with others. So next time someone says, "You're wrong", stop and ask yourself if it's true? Become aware of how you wish to immediately respond and pause. And perhaps before you respond, ask yourself if it really even matters. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Right_and_Wrong-_a_balancing_act 7527FC0A98A477A18CBF1DB1571C59E1 Thu, 21 Jul 2011 05:52:00 PM You've probably heard that it's a good idea to love yourself, but do you know what that means? For most people it is coming to terms with who you really are; not who you are not, who you would like to be, but who you really are. You may wonder who you are. In short you are a spiritual being in a human body who is therefore subject to the reality of being "human". This means that, despite your best efforts, you will experience feelings of up and down, in and out, good and bad and right and wrong. This fallible, changeable nature is all of our reality. But so too is our longing to love and be loved. So learning to roll with the bad times and appreciate the good times brings us closer to our nature and the truth of who we are. Accepting and appreciating who we are is one of the best ways we can love ourself. If today you feel "good" accept and appreciate it. If today feels "bad" accept it for what it is, do your best to roll with it, and if you can't, get help from a friend, colleague, family member or professional even if only to lift your spirits. Loving yourself starts with your truth and ends with what feels like a hug. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Loving_Yourself 561FC30B91A3ED65835F84D89EA41D16 Mon, 09 May 2011 12:00:00 AM Sometimes when we have been honest enough to ask ourselves how we are, we become disappointed with our truth. This can be hard. It also can often be the reason we didn't want to know the truth in the first place. Learning to become comfortable with our disappointment is the only way we can ever let go of it. Ignoring our disappointment locks us to the energy of it- we may get temporary relief by filling our mind with different thoughts but the feeling is always there. In many of the other posts I suggest you allow yourself to feel that which is moving through you. Today I suggest that when you find yourself disappointed in yourself, another or a situation, allow yourself to relax with it, let it be and feel it without resistance. If, after feeling it, you find yourself unable to move out of that state of being it's likely you have become stuck in your mind as to what you need to decide or do to help you out of the situation. If this is the case seek help from another outside of the situation who can help you see, find or reassure you of other options. This will help you out of the mental maze you may have become stuck in. Disappointment acknowledged and felt can only lead to better feeling states of being. States of being you are designed to feel. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Truth,_Understanding_and_Disappointment 724F9F0231764FA63408C6B7187CFACC Mon, 18 Apr 2011 12:00:00 AM Sometimes we may not wish to see, know and especially feel what is happening to us; the currents running through our lives, the thoughts we hide from and the deeper feelings hidden below. We may hide them from view, shore ourselves up and absorb ourselves in something else. But this is not living a truthful life and and no matter how we hide or where we absorb ourselves, what we've buried stays within. So how do you move on from what is or has happened and how you feel about it? Trust that there is a part of you that is pure, eternal and worthy of love, even if you do not fully experience it. Take this concept and fix to it  your truth, allowing yourself see and feel the currents and facets of your life as they are, even though this may be painful. As you allow this to be, you will begin to gain some understanding of what really  happened and how you truly feel. Then let yourself rest. You are not defined by your mistakes or by your victories, but by your faith and trust in yourself and the higher powers that surround you. 1+1+1 can give you what you really want- personal truth. You may not be perfect but understanding this, truly understanding this, gives you personal freedom and spiritual liberation. Trust in yourself and you can set yourself free. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Trust,_Truth_and_Understanding 4D3E295AEA7F1AC96612A9B9EEBD10C7 Mon, 11 Apr 2011 12:00:00 AM Your body moves in cycles. There are times that you will need rest. When you need to rest what do you do? Choosing to rest when you need it restores harmony between body, mind and spirit. Choosing to push through the bodies natural rhythms breaks down harmony between body, mind and spirit. Today you may need rest. Today this may mean time for a cup of tea. Today this may mean a 'disco' or 'nana' nap (so named by a friend of mine who napped in the day to party at night pre children and naps during the day when needed post children). Today you may feel full of life and not need to rest. Regardless of the cycle that you are in today, honour it. It's yours and it's real no matter how busy your day is or is not. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Rest 55276C10D84E1DF7713B441E76E141F9 Mon, 21 Mar 2011 12:00:00 AM Sometimes we all feel like we need a little inspiration. Where do you get yours from? It can come from anywhere. It lifts us up and helps us transcend our earthly worries and activities and gives us a boost, an answer or potential avenues into what comes next. Everything is just a little bit easier with it.  If you would like to feel a little easier today why not add some inspiration into whatever you are doing? Lighten it up, add a pinch of a better feeling. If you're not sure where yours might be, look around you. Take your time and wait till your eye, ear, or nose tells you what it is, for you, in this moment. The time it takes for the connection to be made may be momentary or take several minutes. Regardless, taking inspiration into whatever you do next will feel so much better. Right now the wind is blowing through the leaves I can see through the window. I'm going out to feel it on my skin and take some feel good into the rest of my day.  http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Inspiration CBC8E0ED71108B223FA30E29E88B06DE Mon, 14 Mar 2011 12:00:00 AM When experiencing pain or discomfort in their body many people become so fixated on what's wrong that it fills their entire consciousness. Pain is an internal alarm mechanism designed to tell us that something is wrong. Next time you experience pain or discomfort in your body try "watching it". What do I mean? Stop what you are doing, sit or lie down and use your mind to observe your discomfort. Become aware of the rise and fall of the levels of discomfort. Become aware of your ability to feel the discomfort and observe it at the same time. Their are many advantages to doing so. Firstly, by being aware of the discomfort and your ability to observe the discomfort, your mind is unable to focus solely on the discomfort. This has the effect to lessen the discomfort. Secondly, over time, you will begin to understand that you are something more than your physical body. This will have the effect of freeing your sense of self from whatever condition your body is currently in- this is liberating! Thirdly, and perhaps ironically, you will actually raise your awareness of the needs of your physical body by learning to observe pain and discomfort rather than identify with its very immediate needs. This will mean you are more likely to explore ways to improve your overall health and well being. This can only ever be a good thing... http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Observing_Pain_and_Discomfort_in_the_Body 70B378C42582876DB09453C7499F39DA Mon, 07 Mar 2011 12:00:00 AM Sometimes we need to do something and we don't know where we are going to get the strength or inspiration from. If this is where you are take time to sit quietly and begin a conversation with yourself, your God, or your angels or guides. What is it that's wrong? What is it you need? Ask these questions. Wait a while. You will have heard your answer even if it was spoken to you in silence. Act on what feels right afterwards even if it may not make sense. Courage and fortitude are wells we can always find ways to tap into. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Sometimes 40F887F0666BA1AA10B835ACA44807D1 Tue, 22 Feb 2011 12:00:00 AM Today is Valentine's Day. People think and feel very differently about today. Some people join in this celebratrion of love. Other's avoid it, despise it and it can feel like the saddest day of the year for others. If this is a sad day for you why not lighten it by celebrating you today. Choosing to love and appreciate yourself is one of the most powerful things you can do on earth. Buy yourself flowers, write nice things about yourself in a card or give yourself some kind of treat. If you know this is a sad day for a friend or family member why not make a gesture of love and appreciation towards them. A phone call even. Love is best shared. Sharing some with you, XXX   http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Valentine's_Day 4678D5958BBDE8F684090F72E4CEF4AA Mon, 14 Feb 2011 12:00:00 AM What happens to you when it rains? Today it is raining. How do you feel? What do you think? So many of us, unwittingly, decide the day is going to be "bad" because it's raining, because the bus didn't come or because we ran out of milk. You may have been inconvenienced. However at any time you are free to switch the focus of your thoughts to happier topics or even to gaze at something beautiful. Rain drops can be beautiful if you are able to watch them without the mind's monologue of inconvenience. Choosing to switch your focus will require some discipline. However it will also mean that you are much more likely to have a better day. So today it may rain, or it may not. When you find yourself inconvenienced by something outside of your control today- and this is likely- switch your focus. Eventually you may begin to experience that you are neither better nor less than the circumstances surrounding you. Today it is raining for me. I have changed my plans. I don't need to water the garden and I get an opportunity to watch the leaves of the plants become luminous against a dark sky. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Today_It's_Raining F91F52EA9E3BBB920A0B6B8C2A4D84B8 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 12:00:00 AM Today is my Mother's birthday. She's been with the angels for five years now. When I think of her I feel love, appreciation and as I type this a huge sense of fun as she's just switched the electricity off! In physical life she was an electrician's daughter. As literally a free spirit she is still active in my life in the subtler ways. If you are lucky enough to have your parents still with you in body I hope for your sake you take the time to love and nurture them in the best way you are capable of. You are likely to miss them when they're gone from their body. The love you have for them and the love they have for you after physical death is not gone- love transcends space and time and, if you choose, you can remember the love and feel it now. This feels good. So Happy Birthday Mum! XXX http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=My_Mother's_Birthday A55755F637A1E70544C5D44907E93D09 Sat, 12 Feb 2011 12:00:00 AM We live ritually. Every day we get up, brush our teeth, and prepare for the day. Have you ever asked what meaning they give? The potential is to create states of health and well being and sow the seeds of having a good day. However for some of us our rituals are practiced with a heavy heart, resentment or even anxiety over what the day may hold for us. Why not change your ritual? I don't mean don't go to work. I'm suggesting bringing in a bit of life/happiness/spice/interest into whatever you habitually do. Change your toothpaste, sing to music, visit a different coffee shop, decide to tell a joke, look and smile at people on the bus. It doesn't matter what it is you choose to do. But the results will mean a more awake and engaged you. Now that feels better... http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Daily_Ritual 3B04D1AB10D90EB0B44D86762AD50C23 Tue, 11 May 2010 09:09:00 AM Can all be fair in love and war? When you hurt the ones you love the most you hurt yourself. You begin to disintegrate on the inside feeling wronged or righted. The fear and guilt that then ensues can often be strong enough to halt what is needed: the healing of relationships. When you have hurt someone, through intention or not, the first person to seek forgiveness from is yourself. When you have forgiven yourself you can recognize that hurting another came first from your ability to hurt yourself. Make peace with that. From this place of peace healing and possibility can prosper. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Loving_Self,_Healing_Relationships 9248C8D3ABF51F9E895EEBDB47798774 Fri, 23 Apr 2010 10:48:00 AM Most people spend their entire lives watching and being concerned with others. Even when it comes to matters of the self they review themself through the perceived eyes of another or others. Is this you? If it is a life of happiness will elude you. Why? You are not at the centre of your life. Instead exists a hologram that that looks and sounds like you but isn't ever truly you. Learn to watch the self. Learn to watch the rise and fall of the breath; the temperature changes in the body and how settled or unsettled you feel inside. Learning to watch the self is the only way to keep the real you at the centre of your life. Keeping you at the centre of your life is the only way to achieve happiness.  http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Who_Are_You_Watching? B5631D4D4830C50F2E1CC09CBF846A46 Thu, 15 Apr 2010 03:03:00 PM Sometimes we can feel washed up, helpless and alone. Last week I walked along the beach where thousands of jellyfish had been left by the tide to dry up and die on the sand. Physically they could do nothing about it. They had no hands or feet to lift themselves back to the water. There were no family, friends, colleagues or professionals to pick them up and help them in their time of need. We are so lucky as a species. We have the capabilities of picking ourselves up. Within the reach of everyone is family, a friend, a colleague or a professional that is capable of helping in times of need. If you are feeling alone and washed up in life remember that within you is the ability to pick yourself up and start living again. This is part of your birth right as a human being. If finding this ability seems to difficult ask for help. It's amazing what a pair of helping hands can do. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Remembering_Who_You_Are 6E49B2ED1D4ABCDA3F43625AB16C48D2 Sun, 21 Mar 2010 02:24:00 PM Many people want to know how to get more energy. Feeling like you have vitality- energy- is a natural state of being. If you want more begin by looking at where you already spend energy in daily life. Everything you do equals energy spend. Free spend is not the same as wise spend. Ask yourself, "Do I spend my energy wisely?" and begin an open and honest audit of your energy spend. Ask yourself, "What did I do? Where and what quality was my thinking? Where did I put my effort?" Most importantly open ask yourself if your energy was spent in the areas of your life that match your personal priorities and values. Continually carrying out tasks and living a life that feels meaningless to you is guaranteed to leave you feeling drained and weary. If you realise that you do spend a large amount of energy (time, effort, resource) on something that ultimately does not make you feel good, try to bring some meaning into it or investigate how you can change the situation. Spending your energy on that which matters to you equates to wise spending. In energy terms wise spend equals payback in feelings of well being and more sustained energy levels.  http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Energy 5CC28F31113EC7CD7E546B836CCAE2B9 Sat, 06 Mar 2010 08:50:00 AM When was the last time you were kind? To yourself? To others? Have you ever considered making kindness a practice? Kindness, like mental focus or physical fitness, is a state that can be cultivated. How do you do this? By practicing it repeatedly. Small acts will make you feel better. A practice will make you feel good. This, after all, is what the promise of new cars, clothes and people promise. Try practicing kindness in small or large ways today. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Kindness 7C965BE5B12647CE5A16DEF8F0F5E502 Tue, 19 Jan 2010 11:59:00 AM How well do you trust? Yourself? Others? Trust is implicit with harmony, health and well being. Learn to trust yourself. After all what do you have to lose? Yourself? If this seems hard take small steps everyday to rebuild the connection back to you. It is only through connecting with self that trust can be re-gained. Try trusting yourself -even a little- today. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Trust 2F81EAE07126287C59C259054052DDB9 Fri, 15 Jan 2010 03:17:00 PM Be mindful of how you feel as you go about your daily business. If asked, "What were the qualities that made up your day", what would you say? http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=How_are_you?_Really? D59DC19438862C5587A7AFFD889AAEBC Tue, 05 Jan 2010 09:24:00 AM You may have apprehensions and misgivings about the events and situations that happened in 2009. Let them go. Decide to give yourself a clean slate. Where amends need to be made make them and move on. Learn to keep yourself in the present and move with as much dignity as you can into this year. This year is yours after all if you choose it. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Happy_2010! 298F921D3A25E7DD55ABC1A3FA81A7BB Fri, 01 Jan 2010 10:16:00 AM Let us know what you think, feel and most importantly share your insights or practical know how here. We look forward to your contributions towards a better world. http://zoealexander.co.uk/Blog/post.cfm?Title=Share_Your_Insights 0AD8CA4E618804717B7BEBC76DED2C54 Thu, 24 Jul 2008 12:05:00 PM