tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552Fri, 01 Nov 2024 10:44:46 +0000MontyI know I'm coolReviewWeekend shenanigansAnimaliaAssholesBaywatchBestieBirthdaysBladder talesBlog SwapBug TalesChuck 'er upCrazy Dog LadyCreeps everwhereDevilFailureFamily mattersFillerFilmsGabrielGod hates meHalloweenHelicoptersI am not a teenagerKarate kick to the faceLong nightsNight terrorsOh my earsOh what a nightParanormal Activity 2Sharehouses are such funSigh sigh sighSurrenderTattooThailandThe things I do for educationWingeYour mumZombiesgenitalshousemates can suck metrue factwerewolfhttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)Blogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1521995305198223064Tue, 21 Dec 2010 23:41:00 +00002010-12-22T09:41:37.219+10:00Blog SwapBug TalesFailureYour mumSo, over on 20 Something Bloggers they were having a Blog Swap. Obviously I signed up, and got stuck into writing a blog for it. HOWEVER, the person I was partnered with hasn’t presented me with a post, nor has he posted mine, so I’m just going to go ahead and blog swap with myself. I’m cooler than him anyway.The subject was: ACTION. What will you do next year that you’ve been putting off for toohttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/12/blog-swap-failure.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-5037219295281986118Tue, 07 Dec 2010 00:53:00 +00002010-12-07T10:53:07.925+10:00true factwerewolfYesterday, I was attacked by a werewolf. Honest to gosh, it happened. I couldn’t get to sleep last night, so I decided to go for a walk to tire myself out. I crawled out of bed, put some clothes on and headed out the front door, making sure to leave it unlocked so I could get back in without having to carry my keys.I ambled up the street, humming along to myself so there wasn’t complete silence. http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/12/i-was-attacked-by-werewolf-true-story.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1876077959291062534Wed, 01 Dec 2010 02:18:00 +00002010-12-01T12:18:43.521+10:00genitalsThailandDear Thailand,In three weeks and five days, Alyssa and I will be inside you, touching your bits and probably outstaying our welcome. I know you’re excited about it though, because I’ve seen your Facebook statuses, so don’t try and deny it. Before we reach you, we’ll be in Kuala Lumpur for a day, which isn’t going to be anywhere near as good as you, so don’t get jealous please.But once we land in http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/12/dear-thailand.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-6296196007897756837Tue, 30 Nov 2010 22:52:00 +00002010-12-01T08:52:18.568+10:00DevilReviewOnce again the delightful sweetpeas at Review Brisbane presented me with free tickets, this time to Devil, and in return I have reviewed it. "Holy dooley. This was epic. The end. Okay, I’ll go into detail, shall I? I adore horror movies, especially ones that aren’t exactly like every other horror movie in the history of ever. I never would have thought about a movie where a bunch of peoplehttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/12/devil-review.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-8280042473926668676Mon, 15 Nov 2010 23:30:00 +00002010-11-16T09:30:59.435+10:00Oh what a nightI sure do love dinner dates, especially if they’re with my darling little Ally. She’s one of those people that are so cute you just want to push them in a bush. A big, spiky bush. With flowers.Anyhoo, we went out for Mexican last night, which is pretty much the greatest food ever. Om nom nom. When I pulled into the carpark, she was just getting out of the car. The first thing she said to me was, http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/you-want-to-what-my-what.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-5283925347839127403Mon, 15 Nov 2010 04:24:00 +00002010-11-15T14:24:56.960+10:00HelicoptersI know I'm coolSunday was the highlight of my weekend/week/month, apart from the 6.30am wakeup which kind of sucked balls. Actually, it didn’t really. It meant that I had time to sit around on my ass before driving to the Coast to have breakfast with Holly.When I arrived at Holly’s, she opened the door in her towel (she wants me) and went and had a shower while I was pounced on by her pup, Baxter. He bit my http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/you-wish-you-were-as-cool-as-me.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-7044192614763455470Thu, 11 Nov 2010 04:05:00 +00002010-11-11T14:05:55.930+10:00AssholesBaywatchI am not a teenagerTattooHow do I top a post about my bladder? None of my other organs are very interesting, so this may prove to be difficult. What’s happened recently? Let’s see...I saw a movie, cleaned up dog vomit, made plans for the weekend...FUCK, YOU GUYS! My life is so god damn boring!I could make up some fantastical story, involving really attractive guys and girls slowly running up a beach...OH SHIT, that’s http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/kicks-to-tits.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1217271281980792630Tue, 09 Nov 2010 03:28:00 +00002010-11-09T13:28:58.742+10:00Bladder talesGod hates meI have failed you, creepers that actually read this. I didn’t tell you anything amusing in my last post. This was mainly because I hadn’t had my customary ‘after lunch’ coffee, but I’ve had it now so I can blog properly. Maybe. As I mentioned, I stayed at my nan and pop’s place on the Gold Coast over the weekend, which is about an hour and a half from my place. Dad and I went shopping yesterdayhttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/this-post-is-all-about-my-bladder.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-3149429091864055091Tue, 09 Nov 2010 02:23:00 +00002010-11-16T10:19:38.810+10:00Oh my earsWingeOn Sunday my nan and pop held a lunch with uncles, aunties and grandchildren aplenty. As usual, I sat there awkwardly while everyone else chatted away and made jokes about Jeremy’s toes (they’re like raptors apparently). I was at the end of the table with my sunglasses on (I have sensitive eyes, okay?), staring at the table and playing with the tablecloth, when I’d look up numerous times to see http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/shitdamn-this-is-half-assed.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1258367582192953401Fri, 05 Nov 2010 02:07:00 +00002010-11-16T10:20:51.464+10:00Family mattersThis weekend my dad will be coming to the Coast to see his Thai girlfriend off. I’m glad that I get to see dad before Christmas, since I can’t visit him as I’ll be overseas, but at the same time I’m fucking pissed. My 21st birthday was in September, and I had invited dad down to celebrate with everyone else. He originally said that he might make it, but then said that he just couldn’t afford to. http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/i-know-ill-regret-posting-this-but-here.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1832658767997267709Tue, 02 Nov 2010 03:34:00 +00002010-11-02T13:34:11.678+10:00housemates can suck meSharehouses are such funI’ve only been living out of home for 3 years (and back at home for portions of that), yet I somehow always move in with shitfaces. They could be the not-clean-the-house kind, or the you-can’t-do-that kind, but I seem to have encountered them all.I first moved out of home just after I turned 18. I had my license and a full time job so I was all set. At this time I was a hardcore vegan and decidedhttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/housemates-part-1.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-2904652145487317700Mon, 01 Nov 2010 22:29:00 +00002010-11-02T08:29:18.790+10:00Paranormal Activity 2ReviewLast night, my little brother and I went to see Paranormal Activity 2. As I won the tickets from Review Brisbane, I was required to write a review. Here we go; Let me preface this by saying just how much I enjoyed the first Paranormal Activity. The way the movie was filmed was unlike any other horror movie I had seen, and the fact that they relied on something unseen as the main premise of the http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/paranormal-activity-2-review.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-15788043393220239Mon, 01 Nov 2010 00:10:00 +00002010-11-16T11:51:40.230+10:00HalloweenMontyWeekend shenanigansYesterday was the day. It was Monty’s first birthday party. I know, I know; throwing a party for your dog is so fucking lame and i’m totally going to die alone. But I love my puppy, and I love having get togethers and I love Halloween so it was valid, okay?!I woke up at 8am, trying my hardest to sleep in for longer but failing. After stumbling to the kitchen for coffee and toast, I retreated to http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/11/party-like-that-movie-only-better-and.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-5027139683328261979Wed, 27 Oct 2010 22:18:00 +00002010-10-28T08:18:02.920+10:00Sigh sigh sighI got to work about ten minutes ago, to find B1 sad and angry in his office. He went on to explain the reason for his mood.Basically, someone stole one of the work trucks from his B2’s driveway last night. This is eight weeks after B1’s ute was stolen from HIS house. I swear to god, if someone touches my car, I will kick some bitches. HARD. In the privates.The people that stole B2’s ute last http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/you-dirty-thieves.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-3775366597836300175Wed, 27 Oct 2010 03:38:00 +00002010-10-27T13:38:50.705+10:00The things I do for educationThis conversation happened yesterday at college. I only go once a month, but it still manages to completely drain me of any and all hope. This was with a girl that started yesterday. Guess who got to be her buddy? We had to pair up and practice asking each other open ended questions. Her: Uhm okay so I have to ask you some open ended questions.Me: Yes.H: Okay...*giggles* This is hard.M: *smiles http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/im-big-believer-in-secret.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1052582168029529608Tue, 26 Oct 2010 22:58:00 +00002010-11-16T12:11:40.210+10:00BestieCrazy Dog LadyMontyToday is a very special day. On this day last year, my little baby dog was pushed out of his mum’s vagina and fell into the world as a ball of goo and fur. It’s a nice picture isn’t it?So because of the momentous occasion that was his birth, Monty is spending the day with me at work. I love it when he comes into work with me. He barks at the boys, and gives me an excuse to go for walks outside sohttp://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/its-possible-i-will-die-alone.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-4517640346753034635Fri, 22 Oct 2010 02:51:00 +00002010-10-22T12:51:47.452+10:00SurrenderI hate you so much. So very much.Do you know why? Because you make feelings that I had long ago buried and forgotten about, come back up to the surface. They burst and I am suddenly a different person. I’m no longer cold and calculated. I’m not able to walk away with a shrug of my shoulders, having resigned myself to the fact that I am alone, and will be alone for a long time to come, therefore http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/is-this-fiction.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-3611073822313089536Thu, 21 Oct 2010 00:36:00 +00002010-11-16T12:17:12.272+10:00BirthdaysI know I'm coolYesterday was Ally’s 21st birthday. It was all very exciting and a lot of exclamation points were flying around in text messages and on Facebook and Twitter.I was invited to her place for dinner, so at 6pm last night, I drove the half hour to her place. When I got there I knocked on the door, and her mum yelled out for me to come in. I could hear her and Ally in the kitchen, where Ally http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/i-need-to-pee-but-i-must-blog-first.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-447124571752271469Wed, 20 Oct 2010 02:18:00 +00002010-11-16T12:20:39.604+10:00Creeps everwhereMontyNight terrorsI seem to suffer from night terrors. Google says this is what a night terror is, for those that are unaware: A night terror, also known as a sleep terror or pavor nocturnus, is a parasomnia disorder characterized by extreme terror and a temporary inability to regain full consciousness. The subject wakes abruptly from slow-wave sleep, with waking usually accompanied by gasping, moaning, or http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/spiders-everywhere.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-3782567487595124091Mon, 18 Oct 2010 00:25:00 +00002010-11-16T12:25:51.106+10:00MontyWeekend shenanigansFor once, I actually had a pretty good weekend. And I got out of the house! Saturday morning started off slowly. Ma made me breakfast and then I baked some biscuits for Holly and puttered around doing housework for a while. Since Ma and Gabriel were in their house cleaning frenzy, I decided to take Monty for a walk.It has been stupidly windy around these parts for the last few days, and http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/whats-my-name.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-3511688705776896149Thu, 14 Oct 2010 22:27:00 +00002010-11-16T12:27:05.920+10:00FillerKarate kick to the faceI had to see the ex housemate yesterday. I’d arranged for my old neighbour to collect my mail so that I could pick it up from her and not have to see the wankstaff that kicked me out, but she got home just as I got there, so I was forced to hand her my keys in person instead of leaving them in the letterbox like I’d planned. I’d like to say I kicked her in vagina, stole her wallet and skipped http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/woo-haircuts.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-8389107245259154489Wed, 13 Oct 2010 22:02:00 +00002010-11-16T12:29:18.898+10:00Chuck 'er upLong nightsMontySo last night was fun.I had been home from work for about an hour, and was watching Sabrina Goes To Rome, which is totally awesome and has lots of sparkly magic and lulz and talking animals, when I heard Gabriel and Ma shrieking.Gabriel was yelling, “Monty! No! NO no no no no no! NO! Ughhhh Monty!” while mum was trying not to laugh but failing miserably. I ran out of my room, arms waving crazily,http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/dirty-rugs-and-long-nights.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-1803069446078821661Tue, 12 Oct 2010 00:15:00 +00002010-10-12T12:50:45.200+10:00AnimaliaOn Sunday as I was recovering from watching The Human Centipede by watching a shitload of Sabrina and attempting to doze off, Ma started yelling about a king parrot, and how OMG there’s a king parrot down there!I ignored her, because usually she does that when one lands on our balcony, so I figured I could just block it out and head back to dreamland. But then she started screaming for a towel, http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/king-george-such-brave-little-fellow.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-210873541104243956Mon, 11 Oct 2010 22:52:00 +00002010-10-12T08:52:40.735+10:00FilmsZombiesSo, last night I went to see Resident Evil: Afterlife with LB (little brother) thanks to Review Brisbane. In exchange for the tickets, I was asked to do a review of the film, so here we go: I’d never seen a 3D movie before, so walking into the cinema to see Resident Evil: Afterlife 3D, I was feeling a tad apprehensive. What if some zombie jumped out at me and I screamed a little, annoying the http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/resident-evil-afterlife-review.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1771094102064752552.post-7687103493691893573Mon, 11 Oct 2010 04:07:00 +00002010-10-12T12:51:52.686+10:00GabrielMontyAs this is my first post, I can assure you it will be boring as shit. I have no clear definition of this blog, or even this post, so have fun with the whole 'keeping up' thing. At the moment, I'm going through a hellish housemate saga so I'll be sure to post that delightfully entertaining story within the next few weeks. What that means though, is that I've had to move back in with my mum. http://zombiesharknet.blogspot.com/2010/10/foray-into-blogland.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Saam Rae)0