A Bidayuh Take

I am Tipok

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 17:01:00 +0000

This had been running in my mind since I review back my previous post titled 'The Story of Our English Name' and reading through the comments. Going through my own post and also the comments in a third person perspective, I was kinda amused. Then becomes thoughtful.

Bidayuh to outsiders are known as simple minded people with simple wants and needs. Though I seriously doubt it; I prefer the terms different wants and needs yet basically being human still the same. But that’s another story and shall be told another time.

When come to English name, mentioned in my previous post, we are downright creative. Just recently, I got to know two more Bidayuh babies with a rather interesting name; Haniel and Nolan. Not that I’m a bit surprised because one of the parents happened to have interesting names too.

But I wonder, will this trend continues in the future? What had happened to our Bidayuh name?

For those who doesn’t know, let me tell you a little bit about Bidayuh names. Heck, I’m not an expert in this but I write what I know.

First of all, Bidayuh must not have the same name as their close relatives. It was considered as bad luck. Let say if you are named Teddy then your cousins and even distant cousins are not allowed to be named Teddy. I don’t know why but names are considered sacred as far as I can remembers from my own family. If two people in the same family circle are named Teddy, the life are deemed divided. One would suck the other spirit; so one would carry all the bad luck. Sickness, poverty and as such.

So during my parents and ancestor times, we got names like Miar, Gunjiu, Sikiem, Nyatoi, Linyai, Pidien, Limieng, Ginjos, Samat and etcetra. Now you got an idea what an actual Bidayuh name reads like. But the pronunciation were trickier. As far as I know, it depends on the division or even villages. The ‘L’ and the ‘K’ are more prominent in Bau.

Let just say the name spelled as Ridek. The pronunciation would not be ‘Ree-Dayk’; it would be ‘Lee-Dayctk’ plus there would be a roll on the tongue on ‘L’.

So we got some rather interesting situations here. When a child was given an English name, the older generations would pronounce them in the Bidayuh tongue resulting it into becoming somewhat a Bidayuh name.

For instance, Irene would become Alin, Zainal (okay, not an English but he’s a real person) becomes Jenal, Richard becomes Lichat, Michael becomes Mikar, Eliza becomes Lija, Vincent becomes Bincen. Those with a rather long, strange and maybe over creative names would end up with another Bidayuh name cooked up by some more down to Earth Bidayuh.

So somehow I am Jacqueline and I am also Tipok. And that would be pronounced as ‘Tee-Pock’. Yep, just have to add Spock the Star Trek Vulcan there. Now, my wayward brain just goes “I am Tipok. I came in peace.”

And don’t be surprised too if I say I have gone where I’ve never gone before by putting my Bidayuh name officially on cyberspace.

I have no shame in my Bidayuh (maybe a bit embarrassed caused I’ve found out it’s a male name) but the reason I’ve never told almost anybody outside my own family and villagers is because I think the name is special. Sacred even.

It’s a family name. It’s a name I hold dear to me because not many knew about it.

But then, I realized also, maybe the new generations didn’t have Bidayuh name because nobody talked about it. It was just not popular anymore. Maybe to some it was just not an important aspect of being Bidayuh anymore. And maybe, just maybe, just like me, secretly believe that Bidayuh name should stay within the Bidayuh community.

But as time progresses and Bidayuh also progresses from padi planters to scientists, engineers and business peoples; the mindset should progress too. There was a proverb I read somewhere, you can’t pick the diamond if your hands are filled with rocks. Something just gotta go.

I’m not talking about letting go our Bidayuh name, I’m talking about picking that diamond which are the Bidayuh names and letting the world know about it. Kinda like saying ‘Hey I got a diamond here.’ And don’t go cheekily telling me somebody gonna steal that diamond.

But won’t it be kinda awesome that someday an English guy would call their kids ‘Joss Jolieng’ or ‘Alice Litin’. That would be a total win.

Then again, it would be ‘interestingly weird’ if an English man named Miding come face to face with a Bidayuh man named Michaelangelo.

I have nothing against English name or those Bidayuh who name their kids the strangest name (heck my nephew is Garryvino); just named those cute babies whatever you think is best.

But right now, I want to say, I am a Bidayuh and I am Tipok.

Other Recommended Posts
The Story Of Our English Name
The Story Of My Great Grandfather
Quiet,Serene, Bloody Town of Bau

Allah

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 21:26:00 +0000

I thought of a more 'special' title but the more I thought about it the more I felt the simple title is more fitting. Before I start my first rambling of 2010, let me state some facts. I'm not a theologian or a historian. Nor am I a politician or have any political standing whatsoever. I am a Christian, with earlier years of Mother Mary & Lord Jesus on the cross, became a born again Christian when I 'encountered' Lord Jesus on cross literally. Now I more like moving into another stage of my spiritual journey.

When the issue of using the word 'Allah' raised (again) after the court judgement followed by the Ministry appeal to stop it and then followed by burning of a church, I, like most non-Muslim are incensed.

Why not? Why 'Allah' is strictly for Muslims? Why Malays reacted the way they reacted? Why burn a church? Why politicians (from both sides) are making this into a political issue? And why now?

So before I go trigger-happy-ing-shooting-down-&-stereotyping-Malay Muslims, I decided take a long bath, sit this one out with a long black coffee & see how the issues goes.

By the time I write this, ten churches had been reported vandalised. I've read, may I brag, more than fifty articles and postings, both local & international. Maybe hundreds of comments. And somehow came into a personal conclusion.

This issue amused me.

(And probably amused God too. Oh ye, silly humans.)

First of all, comes the theologians & historians insisting that 'Allah' had been used hundreds of years before Bill Gates was born. Yes, and as far as my non educational research goes, they are right.

Then there the comments that says Muslims in Malaysia will be confused and wrongly converted if 'Allah' are used in Christians publication. So...if a Muslim picked up 'The Herald' after attending a Sunday Mass, they would be confused? Come again? Or maybe somehow a pious Catholics leaves 'The Herald' on the train & a Muslims picks it up and ... wham ... conversion? I'm sorry, I don't think Muslims are dumb & that's a total insult to my Muslims friends.

Politicians seems to jump into the band wagon, some agree, some don't but everybody condemn the hurling of Molotov Cocktail that burn a church and nobody manage to catch the Mat Rempit who did the deed. Most 'memorable' was when a politician mentioned the 'Natrah' case. 'Natrah' was the case of a child raised by a Muslim family and then forced back to a culture that she was not familiar of. That was a sad affair that affected a woman entire life. She died Jul 2009.

But why associate this issue with Natrah? Any Muslims who became Catholics will be send to Holland? Duh.

And I found some pretty interesting quotes from international point of view...

"Because once this particular issue fades away, what will inevitably be left behind in the minds of foreign diplomats - and investors - will be another paragraph in the catalogue of niggling entries that mark Malaysia as a "risk", a country increasingly unable to reconcile its religious and racial communities, thanks in large part to tone-deaf government." ~ Al Jazeera

Ouch.

"The problem in Malaysia is not just a linguistic problem, the roots are much deeper. And let us stop regarding others are worse than us. The church attacks are not exclusive to Malaysia. And to be honest, in many other parts of the world, mosques are also attacked by those who think their religion is superior to others." ~ Jakarta Post

Agreed.

"Muslim groups claim that Christian use of a word so closely associated with Islam in Bibles and children's books could be aimed at winning converts." ~ BBC

But why would a Muslim reads Christian literature in the first place?

And some of the reasons that this issue amused me.

The vandalised churches are given donations & received supports from many agencies including the government to build better churches.

Now everybody knows that 'The Herald' existed. More publications.

I found out that more than 10,000 bibles has been confiscated. There's no such thing as Bahasa Malaysia translated Bible because it was banned and all 'Bahasa' Bibles came from Indonesia and more people will try to buy the 'Bahasa' Bible to check whether I'm right or wrong. Now, non-Muslim who never bothered about 'Allah' before start to call God 'Allah'. Or start a Facebook campaign supporting the use of 'Allah' for all Malaysians.

Now, Mat Rempit who never knew 'Allah' before start to learn about 'Allah'. Well, good for you. Just ditch the Molotov Cocktail, will ya? You'll burn in hell for desecrating a holy place, you know.

Muslims going around protecting churches.

Churches going around praying for Muslims who goes around protecting churches.

And I could go around and around about why this issue amused me but its 4 am. So I leave with just a little bit more.

How I believe this issue should be handle?

With tact and less fire burning on the dance floor.

Where do I stand with this issue?

*With Siti Nurhaliza song "Bukan Cinta Biasa"

"Cintaku bukan di atas kertas
Cintaku getaran yang sama
Tak perlu di paksa
Tak perlu di cari
Kerna ku yakin ada jawabnya...ohhh"

You see, I'm a Bidayuh. I call my God, Topa.

Peace.

*Translation

Bukan Cinta Biasa - Not an ordinary love

"Cintaku bukan di atas kertas - My love is not on a piece of paper
Cintaku getaran yang sama - My love is the same vibration
Tak perlu di paksa - Not needed to be forced
Tak perlu di cari - Not needed to be search for
Kerna ku yakin ada jawabnya...ohhh" - Because I knew there's an answer ... auwww

Other Recommended Post.
A Nice Malaysians
The Incidents With The Escalator
The Quite, Serene, Bloody Town Of Bau

One morning as a Brookian.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 13:09:00 +0000

An alternate take whereby Sarawak is still under Rajah Brooke and there is no Malaysia. A little inspiration from my own comment in one of my post. Mind you, nothing political about this.

******

It’s early, I thought. Though it’s really not that early but I woke up late. And here I am sipping coffee on my apartment balcony overlooking Kuala Lumpur with a newspaper in hand.

MCA IS OUT. The headline of the newspaper seems to scream at me into reading the front page. But I wasn’t really interested. Yesterday it was almost the same when MIC decided they had enough of coalition with UMNO. I sighed. All because this country I’m staying for the time being, refused to change its name from the controversial ‘Tanah Melayu’. And it already celebrated its 50th years of independence.

50 years huh? 50 years and still bickering about three races. I met a young cute guy recently whose dad is Malay and his mom Chinese. And till now he couldn’t figure which races he should put when applying jobs. So I told him, government job, Malay…private sectors, Chinese…international company, Malachi. They might think you’re Jews.

And why oh why do I have to be bothered? My working visa nearly expired and if I couldn’t find myself a job, I might have to go back home. And become the native people of Brooke Borneo. At least here, in the middle of a thriving chaotic city, I’m the unique Brookians, although I rather be known as Borneon. I am a Bidayuh but my dear beloved country…and that’s sarcastically beloved…refused to acknowledge my heritage. So dumped me into the Land Dayak group. Sea dayak, land Dayak! Nobody knows what it actually means anymore! Can’t the royal (pain-in-the-ass) family accept that?

Sometime I wonder what our royal adviser doing? Respected as the Taiko of Borneo, I wonder sometime whether he actually thinks of the native rights. Or whether he was just using his own people to amass his own family fortunes? Though there are many improvements for the last few years….

But still, do we have pay tolls to cross our own bridge?! Gah?!

My dad told me recently, there is an uprising of political unrest. Unlike in Tanah Melayu, surprisingly enough the Malay and Chinese are united. I think it’s because they find themselves being oppressed by all the ‘ang moh’ being brought into the country. And felt they are being mistreated in their own (adopted) land.

Sometime I felt bad about that. At least all the indigenous groups are formally known as Bumiputra; being rightfully the actual native of Borneo but it is really not fair. I mean, I got Malay friends whose families had lived in Borneo for many generations and still not properly recognized as a citizens.

But sometime I’m angry too. On Chinese and Malays. They being educated early gave them the edge, they being gathering fortunes from across the ocean felt the need to be biased towards other groups. Its ironic that some people who accuses other people of being racist are ignorance of their own racism. Not forgetting rude.

And here I am, far from my own country. Seeking the greener grass that my hilly jungle could not provide. Questioning again the Taiko silently. Yet can’t stop thinking that they are many native Brookians…yeah, the Bumiputra…had found success outside of Borneo as they could not find it in their own hometown.

I sipped my coffee again. And found out it had turned lukewarm. I took a steady sip, putting the cup down, started to go through the newspaper again to find something more interesting to read.

Batang Ai dam to be renamed Batang Brooke dam.

I chocked on my coffee. What the hell?! Sometime the royal family just simply makes the worst mistakes. I don’t know whether to laugh or be angry…Batang Brooke…don’t they even know what ‘batang’ means?

I remembered sometimes ago, they tried to rename a Bidayuh village with the name of Tanah Melayu Prime Minister who was visiting the country. That poor guy. I don’t think he realized it was an inside joke to actually putting a curse on his family. Fortunately for him, somebody felt the joke had gone too far.

Talking about names, the Brooke family thinks its ok to name everything using English resulting in a few hilarious embarrassing effects. Change Bau to Smell? What Smelly town? James Town. Nobody thought it existed in Borneo. Even some of the village had their names changed too. Give Village. Burnt Onions Village. Hot Village. Arghhh!!!!

My Dad says that in earlier years, the Brooke family didn’t even bother with the natives. Some of us until now didn’t have a proper ID. I was lucky. My Dad worked for the government and he could speak good English, so he befriended some ‘ang moh’ who helped our family out.

I didn’t like the ‘ang moh’ much back home. They are nice but sometimes they really looked down on us. Maybe considering us that particularly exotic race that should stay in the jungle to attract more tourists. Yet some of them dare to steal our lands and sold our trees. Pollute our rivers and destroyed our hills.

I flip the newspaper again, finding myself thinking too much about home. I haven’t gone back for nearly three years as the plane tickets was too high. Last I gone back was for Christmas. There is no other holiday in Borneo. I guess, being backed up by the Vaticans, the Rajah family feels the needs to NOT acknowledge any other religions. Luckily for me, my family had converted to Catholics so it helps in many ways. There are many other races who are Catholics too. Including Chinese and Malays.

I looked again over the city and wonder about something. What if Borneo had joined Tanah Melayu? What if the Rajah had given Borneo to the British and it would have the chance of being independence? Would things have changed for the better, for worse or maybe, as it is written, nothing will change?

I need to find a job just to renew my working visa. But right now, as I looked at my cup of coffee, I need another cup…preferably a hot one.

Recommended Posts
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?
A nice Malaysian
Dayak or Dyaks? The origins of the words Dayaks.

The incident with the escalator.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 12:00:00 +0000

Years ago, when I was maybe three or five, my mom, me and maybe if I’m not mistaken my older brother, went to a shopping complex. I can’t remember which shopping complex was that. It was either the new Wisma Saberkas or Upwell. All I know it was new. It has elevators that goes up to higher floors and ‘the stairs that moves’.

I remembered being very excited and my mom held to my hands so I just wouldn’t just run off. But me being me, having that independent spirit since I was young, was having problem being still.

I remembered that we were going down the ‘moving stair’. Unknown to me, like many others during that time, my mom was terrified. You see, it was her first time going down the ‘moving stair’ and she have to make sure her two young kids will be safe.
But I jump on the first step. My mom hesitated.

So down I went happily, till I realized my mom was not with me. The only thing that came down was one of her shoe. I remembered looking up then, when I reached bottom, that my mom was still standing.

It takes a few minutes before she decided to take the first step, without one of her shoe. I remembered, that I felt the situation was funny. And maybe so did a few people at that time.

It took many years of recall and realization to understand what my mom went through. She was not only terrified, she was probably embarrassed and felt like a total fool. But down she went and I didn’t hear she complained much about it then.

Before somebody raise some disbelieve with this story, let me explain. This happened more than 20 years ago (I'm SO old!). When a shopping complex in Kuching with an escalator are rare. And for today standard, it wasn’t even considered a shopping complex. Buildings are mostly two storey high. And taller buildings are usually government based buildings.

There are three reasons why I’m writing this incident. Firstly, my mom, quite a conservative Bidayuh lady, after that learn her ways around Kuching. She overcame her fears of escalators and knew how to deal with all the development that pops rapidly around Kuching. She loves eating at KFC. She knew how to be thrifty and to not buy unnecessary things. She joined me in one of Kuching exclusive restaurant and even one time, I brought her to one of the new pub in the city. She stayed in Kuala Lumpur for nine months alone to take care of my sick older brother. She would tell me the times when she had to fend off drug addicts with her umbrella.

She even climbed Mt. Kinabalu with me on my first attempt and was faster. Though she didn’t reached the top coz I got sick at Laban Rata and she couldn’t leave me.

I love my mom. I love the fact even with the lack of knowledge, lack of support, lack of helping hands, she still managed to be that typical conservative Bidayuh lady who had gone through a few hardship and goes on with her life.

The second reason, is to note how far Kuching, like my mom, had grown. From that town in Sarawak into a city with a big mall, a scenic waterfront, a cultural village and so many other developments, I think, not many thought possible. We have universities; government based and privates. Apartments, condos and more higher class hotels. Bridges too. Though some we need to pay tolls to cross them.

Yes, there are still more things to improve. Not only developments in the forms of architecture but also social developments and reformations. There are things needs sharpening. There are things needs conservations. And there are things that are needed to balance all this. Though to some, maybe painfully slow, the positive changes are showing.

The third reason, is how far Bidayuh had grown too. Years ago it would be almost impossible to see highly educated Bidayuh, those who holds official positions, those who are professionals like teachers, engineers, accountants and even doctors. But now there are more and more Bidayuh in the professional work force. Even some goes into business. There are many who ‘fights’ for the Bidayuh rights, by their own way, from politic to non-government-organisation.

And more and more Bidayuh sees education as one of the main point to a better a life. More and more Bidayuh are beginning to see more reasons to be proud of being a Bidayuh. Yes, I'm aware I'm using the 'more' many times. I like that word.

There are still problems though. I’m not that naïve to say that we are without one (or many). But I think, just like my mom, we have to take that tentative first step even though we have only one shoe.

Anyway, Mom. Happy Mothers Day!

Recommended Posts
A nice Malaysian
My Grandmother & Her Death
My full Bidayuh costume

Dayak or Dyaks? The origins of the words Dayaks.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 12:45:00 +0000

Years back, I stumbled upon a history book in Kuching State Library. I can’t remember much of the content of the book but one statement stays in my memory. It was the origins of the words Dayak which not many Sarawakians are even aware of.

In modern times, the word Dayak are being used mostly among the Bidayuh to describe ‘Bidayuh people’. ‘Onak Dayak’ usually refers to the children of Bidayuh. As is ‘dayak sok Bau’ which refers to Bidayuh from Bau regions, which where I came from. Though some insisted that all native or indigenous race of Sarawak are called Dayak. Therefore all races should be called Dayak Bidayuh, Dayak Iban, Dayak Kelabit and so on.

However, before Borneo became a part of Malaysia, there were only two native groups that was known as Dayak. Land Dayak, which stands for the Bidayuh people who lives mostly on hills and mountains. The surrounding forest provided the livelihood for the people as they hunts animals and plants padi on hilly slopes. The Sea Dayak refers to the tribal warring Ibans who live mostly by rivers or sea and was known to produce salts as part of their livelihood. They are also known to attack other indigenious groups for treasures such as beads and also foods. They are known though to kidnap young children to be made their own. Head hunting also have made this groups notorious during their times. Only during the rule of the White Rajah, the practices of head hunting was considered a crime and it slowly fades in times.

Though as hundreds of years had passed the words Dayak had been accepted as part of the Bidayuh language and many thought that it was originally a native word.

Recently, I visited the National Museum in Kuala Lumpur and came upon a picture depicting a few Dayak attacking British ships. What made me laughed was the old picture showed Dayak wearing white turbans and a get-up similar to Indian warriors (Indian as in the native people of India). Can’t help but to wonder who had drawn that picture in the first place and who had allowed it to be depicted as history.

The captions described it as ‘Dyaks attack on British ship’something like that. And that brought me back to the particular history that I’ve read years back.
The word Dyaks was first said by the English soldier, James Brooke as he saw the indigenious race was similar to a Native American race known as the Dyaks people. As he was given the authority to solve the problems concerning the native people who was giving the Brunei royalty a hard time, he described the two main groups as Land Dayak and the Sea Dayak.
I’m not sure about the history of the Dyaks people in native America but I’m thinking of making more research on that. It wouldn’t be surprise if the race is extinct. That was probably the reason why Pangeran Muda Hashim decided James Brooke was the right person to handle the native people. I wonder what happen to the Pangeran after the whole region was given to the Brooke family instead.

There was one quote that says history was written by those who win the battle. That kind of reminds me of how little I know about my own people. Maybe spending a whole day researching at the National Library wouldn’t be a bad idea.

Recommended Posts
My full Bidayuh costume
Quiet, serene, bloody town of Bau.
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?

The story of my great grandfather.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 12:40:00 +0000

The Bidayuh people had a culture that I believe contribute to one reason not much is known about us. Though I did find that some other indigenous group held the same culture. It was a taboo to talk about those who had died, those who are much older and it is a form of disrespect to even say your parents name. What more can be said if it was a grandparent or in my story a great grandfather. So the older generation had passed on without much known about them.

Yet somewhere along the line my mom remembered something about my lineage and mentioned it to me briefly when I was young. It took me years afterward to look into the history and some years more to have a blog to write about it.

As long as I know, my family was considered rich. In the heydays, rich means those who have more lands and have more padi in their keeps. I remembered my grandmother house had one room that was used to keep padi and it was the whole room. When asked why we didn’t cooked those padi, my mom mentioned it was not to be eaten as it has aged for quite sometime.

Briefly, for those who doesn’t know, ‘padi seeds’ are which rice are derived from and it was and still is the main food for Borneon people. So it is to most South East Asian countries anyway.

Back to my story, my grandfather, Nyatoi (yep I’m breaking tradition here by stating his name) was the headman or ‘Ketua Kampung’ of a village named Jugan. It was said that my great grandfather was the headman of one of the main family from Bung Bratak ( a hill in Bau). And Bung Bratak was known to be where most Bidayuh village originated from.

Yet what puzzled me more that his name is Barieng (Aha ha…another tradition breaking. Dear ancestors, if you are reading this, forgive me. Please give me good luck instead of bad.).

Now, Barieng was a traditional and very prominent Iban name. Was my great grandfather an Iban? The answer was no but he was raised as one.

During the tribal wars between the Bidayuh and Iban, who are also known as the Land and Sea Dayak, my great grandfather who was the son of the village headman was abducted by the Ibans. When he was abducted, or which family abducted him was not known. Though it was said that the most active warring Iban tribes were the one originated from Skrang, which is quite a long way from Bau.

Now when he had come of age, it was said that he was returned to the family ( and most probably after the death of the village headman ) to claim the title, the land and the wealth on behalf of the Ibans. Hmm…talk about ancient politics.

But, like all good stories, none are perfect without a dose of romanticism. It was said that he had fallen in love with a Bidayuh girl (most probably a cousin), married her and refused to acknowledge his Iban heritage. Much to the chagrin of his foster family who I think had expected my great grandfather would claim the ‘wealth’ of Bung Bratak for them.

I wonder whether that had started another bout of bloody tribal wars. Some wars happened on a piece of land somewhere not far from Bung Bratak. It was said that many bloodshed happened there. Many died and the land was soaked in blood until the land was known as the place where warriors gave their bodies. In Bidayuh the land was known as ‘Jugan Tading’ or ‘Toding’ or directly translated as ‘give meat’.

That same land, my grandfather migrated to, started another village and in times it was known only as Jugan Village. And that, my friend, is where I came from.

Now, I wished that there was a written history on my family but as mentioned beforehand, all I have are words of mouth. And small pieces here and there to make up a story. Though the story is as true as was told to me, I wonder whether it could be just a figment of an imaginative mind. I wished I could go back to Bung Bratak one day and listens as the ancient forest quietly tell me their tales.

Recommended Posts
Quiet, serene, bloody town of Bau.
My Grandmother & Her Death
My full Bidayuh costume

Why NOT a Bidayuh guy?

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 12:31:00 +0000

Aha ha … this is one topic that might rile up some Bidayuh guys out there. And probably some of my Bidayuh brothers out there will shake their heads.

“Jacq, apa di pikir kau?” (Jacq, what are you thinking?)

No bottle throwing please. Unless its an unopened 500 years old red wine or the highest grade of Chivas. And do throw it properly.

But, woa there, let me present my thoughts first and see whether there are valid points that readers can relate to.

Foremost, this blog entry was prompted by reading an entry by a fellow Bidayuh blogger (male obviously) who laments about a highly educated Bidayuh women who chooses to marry a Malay guy. Here he mention all the negative aspects of her marrying ‘kirieng’ (Malay). Lost of identity. Lost of the Bidayuh generations. And how the ‘poor’ lady would spend her good earn income in raising a non Bidayuh family.

(Err…I beg your pardon?)

And lastly, he ended it with a question “Why not a Bidayuh guy?”

Though the entry amused me, it also raised the perfect question. And it prompted me to write this post based on my own perceptions. Feel free to agree or disagree or sit on the sidelines and watch.

Let me explain a little bit about myself. I’m 30+ single Bidayuh lady living and working in Kuala Lumpur. I have Bidayuh male friends and I have two brothers. And no, I’m not a feminist. The possibility of me choosing a Bidayuh guy as a husband is very unlikely. Well, to tell readers the truth, the possibility of me marrying anybody is also unlikely. Don’t ask. Very easy to explain but very hard to understand.

However, I can empathize with Bidayuh ladies who chooses their soulmate in the form of a Chinese, Indian, Malay, Orang Putih, Orang Hitam and etcetera BUT NOT A BIDAYUH GUY.

Are Bidayuh guy that bad? I don’t think so. I’ve met some who are extraordinary. Yet there are stereotypes on Bidayuh guys that most educated ladies find less appealing. Lets see whether readers can relate to them.

Marrying a Bidayuh guy is not a partnership, its servitude

Bidayuh guys seem to have this particular expectations towards Bidayuh girl. Will cook, will clean, will pick their underwear that they left on the floor, will sacrifice their career for them, will wash their dishes, will wash the toilet, will not have her own opinions, will not involve in political talks, will not have salary higher then them. Worst still, will forgive them no matter how many times they sleep with other women.

And imagine an Oxford educated woman being given all these as unwritten terms and conditions to marry a Bidayuh guy. Obviously, she would turn another way to look for greener pasture though there are no guarantees that the other sides are better.

Bidayuh wives must be virgin.

I have no problems with guys expecting this but it should come from a guy who never even kissed another woman before. A Bidayuh guy who makes it a habit of jumping from one bed to another have no right to expect this. And those who do, I believed are just self conscious and have no confidence in themselves. Caused they probably assume virgins wives would never be able to compare them with other guys. Or would not be able to differentiate what is good or not.

Reality checks, brothers, an orgasm is still an orgasm and an unsatisfied wife is still an unsatisfied wife. Virgins or not.

And nowadays, Bidayuh girls are more liberal (even in the village) so based on this particular stereotypes, won’t they choose a non Bidayuh instead?

A Bidayuh lady must act like a lady.

For someone who broke a few traditional rule and even opposed the elders at one point, I have a very big problem with this particular stereotypes. Long hair, walk slowly, talk slowly and laugh with a small hee hee. If I could rolled my eyes further backward, I’ll do that. Remember, brothers, the blood that runs through a Bidayuh women are the same blood that used and still toiled the earth. Giving birth to as many as ten kids and still survived. And were there to defend the village hundreds years ago when tribal wars were rampant.

These are not the bloodlines of yesteryears English duchess who travels with their handkerchiefs and faint at the sight blood. Even those who are supposedly ladies are mostly not but they happen to have husbands who see them equals. Or they have submitted to supposedly traditions to act like one.

Bidayuh guys are poor, uneducated, drunkards and gamblers.

Very stereotypical and sad to say my early years are surrounded by all the wrong crowd. Bidayuh guy who couldn’t stop drinking yet looked down on Bidayuh girl who does. Bidayuh guys who makes it a habit to sleep around to show how manly they are as they can’t prove much by working as constructions workers and their money are just enough to ‘collect langkau’. Or they lost it easily by playing ‘holo’. The only things they read are Magnum 4D that they hope would make them millionaires one day.

And the daughters are not permitted to act like the men. So they read books, get themselves educated and marry a Russian.

Bidayuh men will not be the best choice to procreate.

Ironically, some Bidayuh guys who manage to be highly educated choose to blame the government, God, educated Bidayuh women, political parties, Taib for the sorry state of Bidayuh men. Oh please, Bidayuh men, the problem is just close by. Look at the beer can clutch around your fingers. Ten of them, which you had finished, can buy a young Bidayuh kid a new schoolbag.

Bidayuh men smokes like a chimney. Big bellies which they are so proud off. And doesn’t seem to be able to provide for a decent family.

So in the course natural selections, would a woman instinct choose these stereotypes to be the father of her unborn child? Simply, no.

Bidayuh men are egoistic.

They are huge contradictions to themselves. They think that they are so good that Bidayuh women would go for them yet looked down on those who acts like ‘perigi cari timba’. Branding them sluts or unfit as wives.

Yet they would not make the first move cause they believe women should come to them instead. And then again…

So why even wonder Bidayuh women ended with so called sweet mouthed Malay, wealthy Chinese, flirty Indians, handsome religious Kelabit, tall good looking Orang Putih and any other races but a BIDAYUH GUY.

So, that’s about some of it and before some of you considered replying me (or throwing me slowly that bottle of unopened Bacardi), do reread my articles. There is one word that I kept on repeating.

If you still can’t guess, the word is ‘Stereotype’.

Stereotype is a dangerous word. It is like because one black man killed another, no blacks are entitled to become the President of a nation. Or few middle-east guys decided to fly and blow up a building, another middle-east nation was invaded and their dictator hung.

Such as the case here. Though some would admit they are guilty of the vices or some Bidayuh brothers would cheekily says on some points, “memang pun kamek macam ya”. But not all and actually not many. If we are talking scientifically, genetically everybody are different. And only human tendencies to generalize things created stereotype. Bidayuh brothers may sighed of relief but let me gives few real life examples that shows the story not over yet and how stereotypes that becomes true again degenerate the image of Bidayuh guys.

Very opinionated lady, smoke and drinks and slept with several men. Had hope for Bidayuh men but they are more interested on her younger sister who seems to be a quite decent girl. She then marries another native race, found God and lived happily with her mixed blood child. The younger sister actually tested smoking and drinking since she was eight, and still do now. She’s not considering marrying a Bidayuh guy.

An Australian educated young Bidayuh engineer had tried to date educated Bidayuh guys but couldn’t stand their mentality. Marries a Chinese-Kelabit six years her junior. Her younger sister, a practicing doctor and a part time Unimas lecturer married an Indian from west Malaysia.

A lady, a clerk who could afford her own car marries a Chinese.

A Bidayuh lady who joined the Doulos Ship as a Christian volunteers couldn’t find a Bidayuh guy who shares her vision and dreams. In her late 30’s, she marries a fellow volunteer, an Australian and moved away with him.

A young girl who couldn’t stand her drunkard father runs away from home and live with her adopted Malay family. Had converted to Muslim and will soon marry the son.

These are not made up stories. These are real. And I’m not going to say what they did was wrong or right. Everybody have the right to choose their life partner. Everybody have the right to be happy. What I’m doing here is putting as much point of view on one webpage and hopefully gets people to look at things differently. Especially both Bidayuh guys and girls. This title could have easily been “Why NOT a Bidayuh girl?” That would definitely shift the mindset.

I believed that stereotypes should be crushed coz I hated myself to be judged due to other people choice of lifesytle. Yet I can’t help but feel uncomfortable on having a Bidayuh guy as my life partner due to many negative examples that I saw.

Though its kinda shows that I’ve branded Bidayuh guy into the above stereotypes. Yet at the same time I believe I should not judge others as I would also be exposed to unfair stereotype.

So how true are these stereotypes anyway?

I’m highly opinionated and very independent. Creative, love art, a bit dyslexic, sometimes paints, enjoy being alone with my own thoughts. I can be serious and yet embarassing loud sometimes. Highly passionate and may get emotional. I danced when I want to and smiled as much as I can. I smoke sometime, especially when I’m writing. I drink alcohol and enjoyed the best and highest concoction. I don’t believe in career but believe in passive income and times should be spent back packing around the world. Sometime I dated. Fooled around before. And has no intention to pamper guys who could not take care of themselves. Love anime, have a blog especially for anime, an avid fangirl and was a huge fan of Pendekar Laut.

With some points on my personality, good and bad depending on perceptions, my question to Bidayuh guys out there….

Would you marry me?

And to Bidayuh girls…

If you have similar traits, would you consider marrying a Bidayuh guy?

Note : Words meaning
1.Collect langkau – ‘Langkau’ is a local made whiskey that are quite cheap but very potent and can be harmful to drink. Collect langkau; meaning a group of guys collect money from each other to buy’langkau’ to drink together.
2.Holo – ‘Holo’ is a famous game of three dices with the pictures of six animals and a piece of cloth with the pictures of the animals divided in six parts. Players will put money on the any of the animals. Dices are rolled in a closed special can. Players will be paid based on the numbers of animals that ‘came out’.
3.Magnum 4D – A famous lotto game in Sarawak.
4.Perigi cari timba – Direct translation is ‘a well looking for a pail’. It describes a woman who go and look for men instead of acting like a proper lady and wait for the men to look for them.
5.“memang pun kamek macam ya” – It is true that we are like that.

Recommended Posts
The incident with the escalator.
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?
The story of my great grandfather.

Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 06:08:00 +0000

This is an article written by Dr. John Brian Anthony from Malaysiakini. Read my personal comments further down.

DOES SWAK'S FUTURE LIES WITH MALAYSIA?
Dr John Brian Anthony | Jul 3, 08 4:10pm Malaysiakini

Looking at the physical development of Sarawak, it lacks so many things even the most basic needs - roads, water, electricity, education and health. Why are we still so dependent on river transport? Why are Sarawak trunk roads in such poor condition and lack proper facilities for drivers?

Why is clean drinking water so difficult to get and there is still no electricity for dwelling places that are located in some urban areas and most sub-urban areas. Where is the money from our timber? Has it gone into the pockets of elite businessmen and corrupted politicians and civil service officers?

A timber tug boat operator now owns one of the largest timber companies and has hundreds and thousands of acres of plantation land - how can that be? It can be when the chief politician makes it so. In the process, the people of Sarawak are deprived of their wealth generated from the valuable tropical trees that the natives have held so dear to their heart.

The jungle is the major provider of their needs. For the rich man, he sent in gangsters to his estates to subdue any Dayak from making complaints and demanding for a better living standard. The Dayak got the wrong end of the stick in all cases.

Money from oil? Many are asking what has happened to the money we get from the oil royalty? We are now suffering from an oil price hike so when did we enjoy the money from our oil then? The price of gas cylinders for cooking is reaching $180 per tank in rural Sarawak. The natives cannot understand such products that are produced in Bintulu - from Sarawak’s gas field - are priced that high.

The West Malaysians are paying much less and they are the ones that have no gas when we take the Terengganu equation out.

Why are we not seeing good schools and good health care for Sarawak’s rural folks? The ‘Flying Doctor’ service is still too limited while billions worth of hospitals are built in West Malaysia - not one but many. In Sarawak, the Sarawak General Hospital was built maybe four decades ago. Do we have a new one - the answer is ‘no’.

We do have new expensive private hospitals though the poor rural folks have no chance of using them as they don't have the money.

Money from hydro-dams? The Batang Ai hydro dam has forced the relocation of people living in the area. There is no land to expand their farming activity and the Sarawak Land Consolidation and Rehabilitation Authority (Salcra) provides only minimum wages for their work in the plantations and a low return for their shares in Salcra. The government has shortchanged the people.

The same government headed by the same person after 30 plus years is ignoring the plight of the poor people in Lubuk Antu. You just need to go to Lubuk Antu - what major economic activities have been implemented there? The answer is none as the government’s idea of helping the poor is by not training them to have skills and knowledge to better themselves.

Some Dayak leaders are there to ensure that the Dayaks do not progress and are therefor easier to control for political gain.

Is electricity made available to the longhouses and villages in nearby areas? The answer is ‘no’.

The Bakun dam is near completion. Is it going to benefit Sarawak poor - the answer is ‘no’. It will feed the richer West Malaysian states and provide power to their industries.

Why don't they relocate their industries to Sarawak? Because it is too expensive and Sarawak lacks basic infrastructure, it lacks skilled workers, it has limited port facilities, a poor transport system, it lacks towns that can provide comforts for the employees, etc.

This goes to show that the rich grab the poor man’s resources but are not paying for such resources in the correct manner. Otherwise why are the poor getting poorer? Why should we still stay with Malaysia?

Money from palm oil? Where is the money earned from plantations? We all know that the biggest plantation companies are from West Malaysia and Umno-linked companies. Just go to their offices and the senior management teams and managers are West Malaysians. The field supervisors and labourers are local Sarawakians - we can't help but feel ‘colonised’ and made second-class citizen of Malaysia.

Our prime land is taken to feed West Malaysians. We feel very disappointed and hurt by this attitude. It is time for Sarawakians to think about leaving Malaysia. Leaving Malaysia - why?

Sarawak has not received what is due to them.

Sarawak has been sidelined and ignored - no senior positions in the federal civil service, no senior members in the police and army, no important positions in the cabinet. The Sarawak bumiputera is a ‘fourth class’ citizen, behind the major races in West Malaysia.

We didn't join Malaysia to only learn to speak Bahasa Malaysia and have Islam as our official religion. We did not join Malaysia to champion ‘Ketuanan Melayu’ and be made used of by Umno elitists to further strengthen their grip on political power and wealth.

We want justice, we want equality, we want respect and we want dignity in our lives. We do not need to bow, kneel and plead for what is rightly ours. We want our own money to develop ourselves and be able to live a better life.

From this frustration with the BN government under Abdullah Ahmad Badawi, we are even thinking of leaving Malaysia. It has brought us untold misery and frustration with its poor leadership and poor planning accorded to Sarawak.

Furthermore, why has the federal government not approved the Dayak community’s wish to form their own political party known as the Malaysian Dayak Congress? They should ensure that the races are represented by political organisations of their choice.

We want to have our political freedom of choice and association. We do not want to feel that there is ethnic genocide in Sarawak too. Sarawak for Sarawakians.

It is the very policy and structure of BN government that is causing Sarawak to lag behind so far from the rest of Malaysia. The Sarawak leader can shout nonsense that the Dayaks are equal to the rest of the Malaysian population etc because he wants to feel good about himself - he who has overstayed his welcome and value.

He has made certain elites in the community rich beyond their wildest dreams. Have these elitists helped Sarawak’s poor - the answer is still ‘no’.

My personal views

Though I do believe that Dr. John put up some serious & valid matter here but the question is what if Sarawak is NOT in Malaysia in the first place? Would things have become better? Would Chinese domination on business becomes absolute that the other communities would be at the point of poverty resulting in serious & maybe deadly revolutions afterwards? Would we find ways to use our petroleum resources & other natural resources for our own state betterment? Or would we have lost that rights to Brunei?

Peninsular Malaysian may deny it as much as they can but its true there are a sense of discrimination, misrepresentation and even wrong assumptions towards East Malaysian. Even I've been four years in Kuala Lumpur there are still people who would ask me 'when did I come to Malaysia?'. Even some who didn't believe we are Bumiputera because most of us Bidayuh are not Muslim. Where is the acknowledgment that we are Malaysian as well? I think this is one matter the government should tackle. Not just keep showing in mainstream media how much we enjoy wearing our traditional garb. Its like, the normal ads, Chinese in suits,Indian in suits, Malays in Batik & suddenly some Iban guy wearing loincloth and feathers. To put it nicely, WTF???!!

How long 'Malaysian' treats Sarawakian as outsiders? And how long Sarawakian will feels that 'Malaysian' are outsiders too? Two sides of the coin,eh?

So who are we to blame? I think Michael Jackson says it best "I'm looking at the man in the mirror. I'm asking him to make a change."

As for growth, Sarawak had grown. I should know. I'm from Bau which use to have big boulders as roads. And I was there when Batang Ai dam was built as my father worked in Sesco. Who was to blame the longhouse didn't have electricity? Those who knew the stories should ask who cheated & lied to them first. I don't think it was the Federal Government. Though I do think when comes to Sarawak they prefer to wash their hands off, leaving the Sarawak Taiko in charge. And as for the Sarawak Taiko was he that bad ? Yet he had somehow 'protected' Sarawakians all these years?

And for the petrol & electrical prices, I do agree that we should NOT pay more. We ARE the producing state anyway. Why is that the government keep ignoring the prices differences & yet still mouthing we are ALL Malaysian? If we are ALL Malaysian, then why can't we all enjoy the same prices?

As for Pak Lah, I'm supporting him. Why? A simple reason. I could think no one could or should replace him now. Datuk Anwar? Datuk Najip? Datuk Muhiyuddin? Their life, their history, their character are all highly questionable. Are they able to manifest the changes that Pak Lah had done. The people power had increased because of him. Yet ironically that same people who enjoyed the power are trying to put him down. I would prefer Datuk Hishammudin but he doesn't seem to have the proper supports. As for Datuk Najip, if he does become Prime Minister one day, I hope he would be a good one. Not just a proxy or bend towards his cronies. If he does becomes Prime Minister of Malaysia, I will support him.

And, why, pray tell? A simple reason. If the citizen doesn't support their leader who happens to be the pillar of the country then who will?

Back to the Sarawak dilemma, I believe Sarawakians, Natives, Malays, Chinese, Indians, Aliens...are one strong & unique bunch. We don't go down that easily. More & more of us a climbing the educational line. More & more of us can be found as professionals in high end industries, even in foreign countries.

And as for me, my contribution to my Bidayuh community, my Sarawak homeland and my country, one of them, is in creating this blog. My way of opening the world to mine.

Recommended Posts
Dayak or Dyaks? The origins of the words Dayaks.
Why NOT a Bidayuh guy?
A dying Bidayuh custom-The Priestess

A dying Bidayuh custom-The Priestess

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 18:17:00 +0000

I saw part of the rituals when I was very very young. The part when the old ladies sat at the wooden swings and sangs songs that I could not understand. I remembered because I wanted to play at the swing but was not permitted.

That was the last time I saw the rituals at my fathers village & I doubt the old ladies still alive.

When I saw this video, it brings a lot of memories. Not just about the rituals but a lot of forgotten teachings and stories from the older folks. Like how my grandma can predict the weather quite accurately by looking at the moon, the night sky or by listening to frogs or crickets.

Or how to camouflage yourself so the river spirit would not disturb you.

The spirits that roamed the jungle and how you should not fear them but regards them as human. That means greeting them as you entered their 'homes'.

Ages ago, when my ancestors worship a different type of God, a certain ritual were done by selected women or priestess to put up prayers for the well being of the village.

Nowadays, only sometime in June during Gawai and selected villages, the rituals are again done by selected few priestess.

But unlike before when these rituals are viewed in reverence and maybe a little anxiety, nowadays most of the younger generations viewed it in open curiosity. To be captured by their mobile phones camera and maybe if something interesting happens they could download it on Youtube. With, I think, a little bit of imagination the title would somehow says 'Strange pagan rituals in Asia' or,God forbids,'Sacrificial women in Haiti'.

Which are ridiculous but then again some people in Youtube are.

Some of the younger generations might choose not to watch it as they believed that it contradicts their Christian faith.

The Al Jazeera team however took up the task on showing a little side of this dying rituals. And the world watched in deep thoughts and fascinations as one more piece of humanity fades away.

Recommended Posts
My Grandmother & Her Death
Why NOT a Bidayuh guy?
My full Bidayuh costume

Bidayuh school childrens from S.R.K Tembawang Sauh

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Mon, 26 May 2008 17:26:00 +0000

Actually these photos were taken in 2006, if I'm not mistaken. Some kids just came out from school waiting for their ride back home or just hanging around with their friends.

It happen that I had my digital camera with me so I took some shots much to the delights of the kids. As you can see, they don't really listen to me when I asked them to pose properly but I think the photos turned out better as it shows the kids in their elements.

Just being kids.

What make these photos special was more than 20 years ago I was in the same school, possible at the same age with some of them. During that time the village was smaller and so was the school. There was no tarred road and the very spot they are playing used to be a dense jungle that was our playground last time.

Doesn't seem to be a proper place for a playground but tell THAT to some Bidayuh kids from two small villages who didn't have T.V to watch, or proper shoes to wear,everybody walked to school and to have three sets of uniform are such rarity; most of us had only one set. The jungle was our playground.

Yet those short years in S.R.K Tembawang Sauh and staying in the village were among the best time of my life. Though it seem pitiable to some that we didn't have proper toilet during that time or that I had to sell sweets and biscuits for money, I felt those years were the most joyous times where I can innocently freely feel without any cares in the world.

And taking these photos, I might have just recorded those moments when a child is just a child.

Recommended Posts
The story of our English name.
The incident with the escalator.
A nice Malaysian

Can you help find Sharlinie?

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Wed, 19 Mar 2008 08:45:00 +0000

On January 9th 2008, a little girl was walking with her sister when somebody abducted her.

She had been missing ever since.

The Malaysian Police had started a massive manhunt for her but to no avail.

Months back another girl had been kidnapped. She was raped,murdered & mutilated. Her body, inside a sport bag, was dumped in front of a shop. This little angel name was Nurin Jazlin.

Her murderer had not been found.

It is said the kidnapper might be the same person or even the same group.

We don't know where is Sharlinie now. Whether or not she is still in Malaysia.

If you've seen her, please contact the Malaysian Police or the number written in the poster.

This is not a joke or spam or a chain mail.

Please pray that she will be returned safely to her family.

No child deserve this fate & no parents deserve this heartache.

Please, return Sharlinie alive & well.

This is for Bidayuh Info

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 13:30:00 +0000

Sometime back, I was introduced to a Bidayuh online group. Actually, I went for their Kuala Lumpur gathering in Menara Yow Chuan by my old pal Barbara aka Babe invitation together with her fiance Joneses; in a private dark lit Karaoke room. Though my memories were dimmed but I did remember Ejol, Cath, Jeffrey aka Ibanez, Nigel, Bidayuh Nigeria and the lamb cooked by our very own Cath. Arrr...yummy.

I also met Jasmine there but I just couldn't recall her & not surprising she couldn't recall me either. Another surprise was we became good friends much much later, on the second time we've met.

The online group is known as Bidayuh Info, which you could find here. I'm not sure how it started, who actually founded it and who are the moderators. Yet with the merry people of Sarawak and one active Malay from West Malaysia (kudos to Ejol!), Bidayuh Info are becoming one of my best online group.

There are a varying type of people in Bidayuh Info with differences in age, professions and so forth. Yet, somehow it had reach the top five ranking for the word Bidayuh under Google search. Just goes to show that this is an online group to be reckon with.

The topics are from dead on serious to the dead on hilarious. Yet when it hit attacks on personal level, the moderators will take up their weapon and gave their warrior like warning; "Put down your weapon or be taken down!"

Ahh...yours truly had felt the brunt of it but the warning was polite (but deadly) and as a Merchant walking on uncharted land, I bowed to the rules. Nor do I have any problems with that because a good forums should have sensitive moderators who are sensitive to others personal space.

Another reason Bidayuh Info had grown the way it is.

As I'm here in Kuala Lumpur, I'm more familiar with the KL group so the following are some of the activities I've followed.

A more detailed posting on one of our outings are posted here in my other blogs 'Travel In Tee'.

The online forum, in my opinion are mild compared to some I've joined before. Most possibly because it was moderated well. But still some members with tongue in cheek raised up some 'hu hah' to get the posting fired up. Not that I have problems with that too. Being fired up, shoot at or get shot at are one of the many excitements in a forum. Most possibly because you won't get yourself killed anyway.

The language used are mostly Sarawakian Malay slang with a healthy dose of English, Bidayuh from all regions and once a while some other 'mix & remixed' vocabulary.

As Bidayuh Info does not really boxed itself for just Bidayuh people, anybody can actually joined in. So, if you are keen to get to know the merry group of Borneon known as Bidayuh, this is the place to be.

Click here.

Recommended Posts
The story of our English name.
Bidayuh school childrens from S.R.K Tembawang Sauh
Enter The Bidayuh

BERSIH rally & the East Malaysian community.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 12:26:00 +0000

On the 10th of Nov around 40,000 Malaysian from all walks of life gathered at 4 different standpoint & marched to see the King to give a memorandum on a cleaner electoral practice.

Before the rally a lot of hu hah from the ruling party & a severe warning from the PM himself. The mainstream media made an effort to support the ruling party ass as usual.

After the rally, again a lot of hu hah especially on the actual events that happens. The mainstream media reported 4000 turns up & 245 were arrested. Strangely, any Tom, Dick & Harry who have eyes can clearly sees that the volume of people could've reach 40,000 or more. This disregarding those who are stopped from other states & those who use LRT & finding the train does not stop at Masjid Jamek.

BERSIH, I think, have achieved the 100,000 mark.

I'm not a political person but I believe instead of being defensive the ruling government should stop and listen of what the people are trying to say. This was not a political rally though it was supported by NGO and opposition parties.

BERSIH had even appointed their own people to make sure the rally runs smoothly & peacefully. Yet the FRU were send in with water cannons.

Yes, this was done without permit but I do not understand why it needed permit in the first place.

And the electoral committee was suppose to be an independent entity from the government. So why it pisses off the government & why our dear PM says he is 'pantang dicabar'?

Who 'cabar' him? This is not about him or the ruling government. The electoral committee is a separate entity by right.

And with all these hu hah in KL, what are the response from East Malaysia? The main media would not report the truth. The truth can only be found in independent news and international news. BBC & CNN quoted that Malaysia ruling government had uses force.

The situations wasn't so bad but it looked bad on international news. I can't help but feel that these international news don't really gives a damn about Malaysia but instead trying to create an opening for western interventions. Where were they when the economy collapse in the 90's & 80s? Just right at the corners to give loans with just the right interest and just the right terms & conditions.

Some East Malaysian probably didn't hear an iota about it. Or don't we care? Are we so separated by physical water and mental barrier that we do not see the value in BERSIH? Or are there actually strong minded East Malaysian out there that rallied on with BERSIH?

I personally knows how 'clean' the voting process can be. Before I came to the age eligible to vote, I already know that my vote would be useless. Now, that I'm eligible, I don't vote. Probably, I would one day. But until I no longer hear of the 'paying booth', then I'll vote. Or see the propaganda flyers flying around with fake stories and letters with fake signatures, then I'll consider voting.

Or the famous line from Sixth Sense "I see dead people...go & vote.".

Maybe I'll consider voting.

This is my contribution to Sabahan & Sarawakian out there. We need BERSIH. We need BERSIH across the oceans. And we badly needs the truth.

Recommended Posts
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?
Why NOT a Bidayuh guy?
Quiet, serene, bloody town of Bau.

A nice Malaysian

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Thu, 13 Sep 2007 08:11:00 +0000

Recently I met up with an acquaintance from Hong Kong who stayed in KL for almost two years. I accompany her for window shopping and dinner … which ends up I’m doing the shopping and she paid for dinner :-P.

We had some friendly conversation but one that struck me most was when I asked her experiences living in KL. She answered simply,

“I can’t believe there are so many nice people here. In fact they are too nice.”

“We are? (Very much in disbelief)....Yah, I guess, there are nice people here.”

“Really, there are so many nice people here…except for the taxi drivers. They always cheat me when they hear me talk.”

I had to laugh to that as she had a very strong Hongkies Cantonese English slang. But what make me think of that particular conversation was that when she said they are nice people in KL I actually wanted to say that she is wrong. She wasn’t just being a ‘nice’ expat as her reply was spontaneous and honest to boot. That made me think back of my life here of more than three years.

Before I come to KL, I’ve been warned on the many ‘evil’ things that KL or West Malaysian are doing and capable of doing.

“They are scoundrels. They are racist. They only get to know you if they want something from you. Find some East Malaysian to mix with. Don’t just hang around with anybody. You’ll get kidnapped. Or mugged. Or worse. They only think of money. You want to be successful in KL you must learn how not to be cheated. You must learn how to cheat. Stay away from Kirieng (Malays) man. They have ‘sweet mouth’. Stay away from Tambi (Indian) man; all of them are married and will cheat you. If you use taxi, make sure the driver is not Indian. Chinese are ‘sombong’. Don’t mix with them….etc.”

These words actually comes from various family members and friends from different background and they all actually meant well. I was known as a little bit of an eccentric and a daredevil so I could understand their worries.

So did I meet with evil West Malaysians? Yeah, I did. I was ever cheated. I was ever taken advantage of. A few time in fact. Was a victim a snatch thief. They didn’t manage to get my purse but I was thrown of the road and still bear that scar.

Meeting with total jerks who were excited to meet me when they know I’m Sarawakian…because somehow to them Sarawakian ladies are easy. It can get really frustrating sometimes. Just because we are a friendly bunch and our perception of physical attraction and relationship are different doesn’t mean we will jump into anybody bed. ( But I do find some Sarawakian ladies who uses this particular stereotype to their own advantages. Makes me thinks who actually are ‘easy’.)

And those who looked down at East Malaysians and thought we still lives in jungles.

But though I held the memories and the experiences, I held no grudges. Mainly because I’ve met nice people in KL.

Taxi drivers who gave me free ride when they know I’m from Sarawak. Big brothers & big sisters who make sure I’m always safe. Those who help to send me back home because I don’t have my own transport. Those who teach me how to hug friends. Those who offered me help when I needed them. A ‘Che che’ who gave me 500.00 to pay my urgent bills during my bad times and didn’t ask me to pay back. That particular Chinese young man who send me to work when I fell of the road during the snatch incident. Probably he was the reason the snatch thief didn’t make a U turn.

That particular person, who is now a TV star, who directed me to a motivational course that changed a lot of my perceptions.

Those who taught me. Those who help me grow. Those I still owe money to even when they’ve forgotten about it. Those who likes to learn about my culture and my home. Those who gives me business and those who teach me business.

More than three years in Kuala Lumpur, one fine day and one fine Hong Kong lady, I’ve finally realized that they are actually more good people in KL than bad people. I believe that we are among the nicest people in the world. And it takes the point of view of an outsider for me to really understand that…to really really honestly understand that.

That we have a lot to be grateful of. That to an outsiders eyes we are not East/West/Bumiputera/Muslim/Or non… we are just simply Malaysian.

As I sms to her later to invite her for ‘yam cha’, I thought of writing this article. To let others know and to remind myself, that though they are ‘evil’ people in KL, I would like to be among the nice one.

I would like to be known as a nice Malaysian.

Recommended Posts
BERSIH rally & the East Malaysian community.
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?
The incident with the escalator.

My full Bidayuh costume

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Wed, 05 Sep 2007 02:24:00 +0000

This photo of me, my cousin and my Mom was taken two years back. My aunty is the one who sew the traditional costume.

This is a typical costume of Bidayuh from the Bau region. It should be more elaborate but I don't have the Bronze belt and coin 'skirt'. And my necklace is all wrong. The necklace is from Sabah. :-)

Recommended Posts
A dying Bidayuh custom-The Priestess
The story of my great grandfather.
Enter The Bidayuh

My Grandmother & Her Death

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Mon, 27 Aug 2007 13:52:00 +0000

I struggled a bit to write this. But I believe it will come to a point in my life to face it and feel comfortable enough to write a bout my grandmother.

When she died she was about 90 years. She was already a bit senile and she acted like a child. She was also sick of old age. So it was a bit hard for my aunts to take care of her. Apart from that she had to take care of her four young children.

There was one time she was put under my family care and it didn’t went well. I personally couldn’t handle her. She slept during the day and woke up during the nights. And like a baby she seek attention that I myself does not have, during those time, the patience to handle. And like a baby she cried and whined that in the end I have to go to the living room to get some sleep. My mother had frequent headaches because of her.

And there was time I had lost my patience and uses my strength against her. I didn’t hit her or anything but she was thumping her feet trying to run off somewhere and I, in my impatience, tried to pull her back. Miscalculating my own strength. Her looks on me. Her sense of betrayal on her eyes haunted me in years to come. Then she was crying that I don’t love her when in fact I did.

I think after that she cried herself to sleep.

I cried. I think I did. I felt guilty but I don’t know how to deal with her. In the end we had to send her back home.

I felt something during those time. I think most of it are pity because non of her children really could cope with her. Non of her grandchildren could really cope with her either.

A few months after that or maybe a year or two, she passed away. That was nearly ten years ago.

I knew its going to happen. Everybody was expecting it. But yet for the one hour back to my village I cried. My older brother and sister kept quite all the way because I rarely cried.

For years to come, as I say, the looks of betrayal haunted me. I wished many times I had the patience to take care of her. I wished that I don’t have the frustrations that stop me from expressing that I still loved her.

I think she was afraid to die. I think she was still hanging on that her children and grandchildren still wants her. And when she thoughts and believed that we didn’t love her anymore, she just let go.

That thought again haunted me as I felt somehow in my demented mind that I’ve pushed her to death. Would I have the patience to love her as I should she might have left this world in peace.

I love you Grandma. I love you with my whole heart. And I still love you. I hope that beyond my own wisdom I could get to understand that you are much more older than me. Wiser than me. And you don’t hold grudges as I held it to myself all these years.

I’m letting you go, Muk. Thank you for being my Grandma. And if there is a possibility I should see you again, do remind me that I love you.

Recommended Posts
This is for Bidayuh Info
Does Sarawak future lies in Malaysia?
The story of our English name.

Quiet, serene, bloody town of Bau.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 15:55:00 +0000

There are two main groups of Bidayuh that most are familiar of. Those who come from Serian region and those who comes from Bau region. Both are small towns on the opposites side of the map with slightly different slang. Surrounded by clusters of villages; surrounded by vast green forest.

I came from Bau & my village tucked away somewhere in the journey to Lundu; near the infamous Bung Bratak.

Bau is actually the name of small growing town a few miles from Kuching City. In Malay the words 'Bau' means 'smell'. Most visitors would relate that names to maybe a certain scents. Like the forest. Or rivers. That 'obviously' reflects the tranquility of the quite town.

However, the story behind the name is far than tranquil. Its a story of real horror, of violence and death. A lot of death.

In the 1940's the Japanese occupied the land surrounded a very famous gold mine owned by a wealthy Chinese. I think there should be a small striving town during that time . A town that support the immigrants Chinese who came to work at the gold mine and also to start a new life. There should be a community during that time but I couldn't find any reference to that.

So, when the Japs arrived, the slaughter begins. Thats all I manage to find out. The Japs came and killed all the Chinese immigrants. The bodies were dumped into nearby caves. Uncovered & unburied.

The stench of rotten bodies spread all over the surrounding area.

I'm not sure about what happened next. Only that the natives and Malays that survived the invasions started to says that the places 'smells'. Thus the name Bau cropped up out of the once striving gold mine area. The gold mine was soon filled up with water, became a lake known today as 'The Blue Lake' or 'Tasik Biru'.

And somehow the name Bau stuck.

An exotic name with a bloody story.

Recommended Posts
Dayak or Dyaks? The origins of the words Dayaks.
Why NOT a Bidayuh guy?
The incident with the escalator.

The story of our English name.

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 14:29:00 +0000

Jacqueline. That is my name. I have a cousin named Jimmy; another named Danielle Patricia,my best friend (a Bidayuh) is Yoko. And we are all pure blooded Bidayuh. Well, accept for Yoko whose grandfather is Chinese.

And no, her name has nothing to do with her famous asian heritage. Her parents were a big fan of John Lennon.

Yet, if anybody manage to step into my small village tuck somewhere in lush Bau and happen to look for a lady named Jacqueline; that person would not be able to find me.

Why? Because in my village I'm known by my Bidayuh name. Or I am known as the daughter of 'quote' my dad Bidayuh name.

For a race that was descended from a rather primitive race why do we have English name? I'm not sure what historian written about this but here's my parents story & why their name had been changed.

The reason was simple. Education.

During my parents time, they are born with with Bidayuh name; as was their parents and their ancestors. However, nearly a hundred years ago, Christian missionary started to penetrate the indigenous Bidayuh villages and surrounding lands. Bringing with them Catholicism and also education that was approved by the current ruling.

And with education, the promise of a better life. However, there was a catch. To be admitted to a 'proper' school, the child must have a Christian name. I'm not sure whether this was a 'must' but I think that my grandparents were given the impression that it was a must. Therefore my parents add into their Bidayuh name English name. My father put it into his identity card because his father thought it will be easier for him to find jobs.

When Sarawak gained its independence and join Malaya, our parents still thought that to get us into school we must have English name.

So, thats how its started. The generation of Bidayuh with Christian/English name. Thus my name is Jacqueline Michael.

Nowadays, this particular strange traditions carries on. And when come to naming kids I find Bidayuh can be quite creative.

When my nephew was born my brother gave him a rather interesting name; Garryvino Alonso. I didn't agree at first because I wanted a simpler English name.

Aragorn. :-D

And don't try to find Garryvino in our small village. His Bidayuh name is Bujoi.
Go figure.

Recommended Posts
My full Bidayuh costume.
A nice Malaysian.

Enter The Bidayuh

noreply@blogger.com (Jac) — Fri, 10 Aug 2007 11:10:00 +0000

"The Bidayuh is a name of a tribe from Borneo island. They are a branch of the Borneo Dayak;Land Dayaks by the British (the former colonist in Sarawak). They are one of the main indigenous ethnic groups in Sarawak and now are settled in areas of southwest Borneo which is modern Kuching and Samarahan in the Malaysian state of Sarawak. Bidayuhs can also be found adjacent areas of west Kalimantan. In Sarawak, most of the Bidayuh population are found within 40 km of the geographical area known as Greater Kuching, within the Kuching and Samarahan division. Today more and more Bidayuh have migrated, and live in Kuching, which is the capital city of Sarawak. They are the second largest Dayak ethnic group in Sarawak after the Iban."

~Excerpts from Wikipedia

Very little of that I know of my own culture. It is because we have a rather strange 'adat' or culture. Never talk about the dead. Never say your elders name. So when come to history, my family never talked about. Luckily this culture is slowly dying out.

With bits & pieces I picked during my years, I find out my own family had quite a colourful story. It was said that my great grandfather was abducted by the Iban & raised by them; given the name Barieng. When he was old enough he was sent back to his birth village to claim the lands which was rightfully his. My great grandpa came from the line of village heads & the his Iban family was hoping that he would claim the land on behalf of his Iban 'family'.

He came back to Bung Bratak, where he was born, married a Bidayuh girl & much to the chagrin of his adopted (abductee) family he remained in Bung Bratak; refusing to surrender what belong to the Bidayuh of Bung Bratak.

:-)

Nowadays, Iban & Bidayuh are very much on friendly term. Somehow the younger generations were not reminded that their ancestors have an 'enjoyable' bloody warfare for hundreds of years.

One thing that my ancestors did right.

I hope this would happen in some countries having civil war. Younger generations should not be raised in hatred. Some ghosts are better left buried.

Recommended Posts
Dyaks or Dayak? The origin of the word Dayak.
The story of my great grandfather.
The story of our English name.