According to Lady A

Let's Talk About the Grammy's

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 13 Feb 2012 17:48:00 +0000

To mark my triumphant return to the interwebnets, let's talk about my favorite night of the year...THE GRAMMY AWARDS!!! So much to talk about I don't know where to start...

I did put the following on my Facebook page as a mini-wrap up:

The Boss is The Man; LL Cool J is STILL fine; Rhianna nominated in general...really???; neon and strobe overload with the pop acts...pretty sure i had a mini seizure; Jennifer Hudson is a goddess, RIP Whitney; Foo Fighters rocked my world; Nikki Minaj needs Jesus...for reals; Adele proved REAL talent will always prevail; Sir Paul McCartney is THE OG; and THAT'S how you end a Grammy show! Overall, great night :-) music industry, i love you

However, some things need to be talked about in a little more detail because it was either that awesome or that much of a hot mess.

I tip my hat to LL Cool J hosting this year's awards. This man is making his way to 50 and is STILL FINE. There isn't much else to say, but you sir can keep licking them lips. Haters are gonna hate; it never gets old. Having a hip hop legend like himself taking center stage like that was a great move by the Recording Academy. I'm not sure if you noticed but the Grammy's format has changed from being just a humdrum awards show to a full on, multi-genre mega concert. LL Cool J was the perfect 'hype man' for this setup. There was more music than awards, but that works better for the Grammy's because it's all about the actual art of making and performing music. I didn't mind only a handful of actual awards being handed out on stage; I was too busy headbanging to Foo Fighters, shaking my bootay with Bruno Mars and swooning over Sir Paul McCartney.

The night no doubt belonged to Miss Adele. Totally swept this year with the BIG ONES (Song of the Year, Record of the Year and Album of the Year) as well as a few more that weren't shown on air. Goes to show, you piss off a really talented person you're bound to get a masterpiece (Taylor Swift, I have a hard time adding you to that list because you make me tired).

And that performance....I would LOVE to put a clip here but the Grammy internet police won't make anything available. If you missed it, shame on you! But do know she was phenomenal as ever and ruled the night. True talent will always prevail!

Of course I can't mention golden Grammy moments without mentioning the passing of Ms. Whitney Houston and her tribute. We'll cover Whitney in another post but Jennifer Hudson truly captured the essence of Ms. Houston's music like none other even if she only did part of one song; it was nevertheless stunning. If anything, Whitney's legacy lies within the powerful voices of super stars like Hudson and Adele that focus on the talent and ignores the foolishness. Hopefully they will learn from their predecessor's mistakes and NEVER give in to the foolishness no matter how tempting it is...

Now, let's talk about the HOT MESSES last night.

First up...Nicki Minaj. I mean, really?! If you didn't see it, I found a decent enough version for you to get the full WTF effect.

Now tell me, how did you feel after that? Scared? Disturbed? Throw up a little bit in your mouth? Me too! Thus why I fast forwarded through all of it when it aired last night (I was watching on delay). I understand every artist wanting to get creative with their craft and making 'water cooler' talking points for the next day, but it was all a hot, steamy mess. Remember, Lady Gaga's Alejandro music video and how that stirred up all sorts of Catholic fury? However, it wasn't as crazy train as Ms. Minaj. I'm not sure what she was trying to accomplish but I think it just crashed and burned horribly and I hope she can recover because I (surprisingly) actually like her and her music.

Second...rainbow bright just about everything. I was in sensory overload with all the neon, strobe lights and sense-deafening pyrotechnics. Meh, maybe I'm turning into an old fogey but the best performances of the night to me were the artists that stood alone with their voices and their instruments. I guess after a year of Adele my standards have escalated. I don't see the need for truly talented people to have a crap ton of stuff going on stage if they don't have to.

Granted, yes, a great show can absolutely come from the lights, lasers and pyro. Hey, I'm an industry person and I love that stuff too. But with all this mega talent on the stage (minus Rhianna) it didn't seem wholly necessary or it seemed a tad too much. But hey, that's pop music these days. Dull the senses and you won't even notice that the person lip syncing might not actually be talented (now I'm talking to you, Rhianna).

The music industry is evolving and we all have to adapt to our new surroundings. But last night proved that the integrity of the arts is still alive and kicking. The industry isn't dead, just needs a little resuscitation. As we mourn the loss of legends (Michael Jackson, Etta James, Whitney Houston, etc.) we must revel in the rise of fresh new talent that will rock and roll us into a new era of music (except you Rhianna, I really need you to go away).

So congratulations to last night's winners and to those who are dreaming about gracing the Grammy stage in the near future...don't give up your dreams. Work, work and work some more and you'll be even closer than you thought.

Oh Brit Brit...

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 03:07:00 +0000

So I just saw the new Britney Spears music video for "Hold It Against Me" and...well...eh, not really sure what to say. There's a whole lot going on in this cluster of a video. Pyrotechnics, shameless product placement, Spears in a wedding dress, weird Lady Gaga-esque costumes on dancers, a kind of comical physical fight between Britney and...herself, and paint shooting from fingers....

Really?!

I wasn't a big fan of the song in the first place and then add a wacked out music video and you have all sorts of a hot mess to deal with. Brit-Brit, you're trying to hard boo-boo. Just play the music, shimmy around a bit and it will be a hit. When you try so hard to look like Gaga, you just look silly. Add in the constant camera movement and flashing lights, you might just have people breaking out into seizures if you're not careful.

I wonder if it's like a peak into Britney's head, proving how bat sh*t insane she actually is. The most interesting part of the video was at the very end with the last visual on screen being a question mark like to say, yea, we know this whole thing is four minutes and twenty-nine seconds of WTF. It's like the producer of the video (Jonas Ackerlund who made equally crazy shiz for Madonna and Gaga) thought to himself, how can we make this the craziest, most ridiculous thing possible and cram in as much as we can leaving the audience's brains scrambled and make them think they want to go buy something from all the tacky product placement simultaneously? Well sir, mission accomplished. The video is an unfortunate hit and we are one step closer to complete intellectual disaster. Good lookin' out! Yay pop music!

Review: The Golden Globes

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 17 Jan 2011 21:44:00 +0000

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Lady A is back, opinionated and ready to take on the circus of pop culture in 2011! Let's kick things off with awards season. First up....THE GOLDEN GLOBES!

I love award shows that are all about stars congratulating themselves on being kings and queens of the universe...it's just entertaining. However, as I wait for my favorites (the Oscars and the Grammy's) I have to comment in the pre-games like the Globes. Those that are nominated and win that night are 'front runners' for the golden, naked man statues next month (referring to the Oscars for those who had their minds in the gutter). Let's take a moment and recap last night's....shenanigans.

Host Ricky Gervais definitely made a splash as the host the second year in a row. Those at home may have thought he was hilarious while the ego-maniac mega stars in attendance winced and laughed uncomfortably joke after joke. Gervais is already being panned for his antics but can I just say...get over yourselves folks! It's all in jest. If he really hated you (meaning celebs), do you think he'd be purposely malicious and destroy his own career simultaneously?

He is GOLD for ratings and kryptonite for celebrity egos, but at the end of the day, NBC cares about who's watching at home and not just those prissy pants in the audience that can't take a joke. Without viewers like the ones not wearing Versace gowns and Gucci suites sitting at home, there wouldn't be actors, or movies, or the gold plated awards they give to each other because WE as consumers actually went to see their 'masterpieces.' Take a breath and stop throwing a tantrum. Leave your egos at the door and just have fun for the evening. Hey, if you wouldn't act like a douche nozzle throughout your career to begin with, then these comedians wouldn't have anything to say. So if your feelings got hurt last night...that's on you boo-boo.

Now on to my favs of the night...

HOORAY Glee!!! Gleeks everywhere can rejoice with major wins last night! Chris Colfer for Best Supporting Actor in a Series for his role as 'Kurt Hummel' and the show also won Best Television Series - Comedy or Musical. So happy to be a Gleek! But hopefully the recognition the show has received can shine an even greater lighter on it's mission to shed light on bullying in high school and the obstacles kid face growing up every single day. Yes, they may sporadically and sometimes awkwardly break out into song and dance during the show that doesn't make sense to some (well, most people), let's focus on the real stories going on: tolerance, respect and self-empowerment amongst teens.

LOVED Natalie Portman's win as Best Actress in a Motion Pictures - Drama for her role in Black Swan; totally rocked my world! See, playing a deranged and crazy ballerina will get you the critical acclaim you've been waiting for. If you haven't seem this movie, you need to ASAP. It's completely trippy, thrilling but awesome all at the same time. You're really kept guessing throughout the movie until the incredible end. Here, take a peek...

But the BIG winner of the night was The Social Network taking away Best Screenplay, Best Original Score, and Best Motion Picture - Drama. Hello Oscara, are you listening?! If you are one of the few people who haven't seen this film (not necessarily accurately based on the founding of Facebook), it absolutely defines a generation. Who doesn't have a Facebook account? Okay, maybe your grandparents or your kindergarten teacher, but hasn't it completely enveloped your life? I know I'm checking my Facebook account every hour, attempting to be witty in my 'status' and widening the gap of real, personal contact with each passing day. I wish this film captured the addiction of Facebook instead of focusing on the alleged doucheness of its founder. Maybe that will be the sequel--Facebook: The Addiction; The New American Crack. I like it. You're welcome Hollywood. It'll be interesting to see how the Oscars will turn out, who will host, who will win and who will get drunk and humiliate themselves in front of millions of viewers. Oh, I do love awards season! Happy New Year!

My Big, Fat, Polygamist Family

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Tue, 05 Oct 2010 23:42:00 +0000

...Seriously TLC?!

Okay, I've said this time and time again, I enjoy the occasional crappy television, BUT TLC's new "reality" series taking a glimpse into the life of a polygamist family, Sister Wives, is taking a step too far into the creepy for me. Not saying that it won't be interesting (it probably will be and I'll more than likely end up watching it), but really TLC? Haven't you gotten your fill of weirdness with shows about families with liters of children, morbidly obese individuals and hoarding crazies? What TLC exec woke up one morning and thought, "Hmm, you know what our programming is missing? A show about multiple marriage! It'll be a hit!" Lame.

You know there will be drama, cat fights and crying...lots and lots of crying. The penis in the center of this foolishness, Kody Brown has four wives and thirteen children, so you know there will be crying. But that's what people want to see! I'm already taking bets to see how long it takes for the wives to start knocking each other off. Of course TLC has come out saying this is all about "learning" and taking a deeper look into a life that the general population doesn't really understand. They do have a point. It will give the audience a chance to take a closer look at this lifestyle and see what it's really all about, but come on, TLC nowadays is to learning as MTV is to music videos. Don't try to play that card boo-boo.

We'll see how this one turns out. So yes, I'm adding this one to the list of crappy TV I'll be consuming for the time being (it's research!). But you know what show STILL hasn't made that list? Jersey Shore. Goes to show how much of a steaming pile of suck that show truly is if I'm willing to watch polygamists over fist pumping. Take that MTV!

Hide Yo Kids!

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 03:39:00 +0000

Dear friends,

Have you laughed today?

I may be the last person on earth who hasn't seen this until recently but I need to post it just on principle. Someone please answer me this, how is it that local news stations find the most ridiculous people for on-camera interviews? If you're late to the game like me and haven't seen this...you know what, let me just set it up like this: there was an attempted rape at a housing project and the victim's brother got irate about the whole thing when being interviewed by a reporter and let all his, umm...personality out. Take a gander...

BUT the BEST part, an auto-tune song was made from the footage AND become a huge hit on iTunes. Gotta love the interwebnets! Enjoy!

Night on "The Town"

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 23:50:00 +0000

Who would've thought rough, east coast accents with dropped R's would sound so sexy? Then again, I'm sure it has something to do with Ben Affleck being in the mix...

Ex-Ben of the notorious Bennifer (back in the day when Jenny "From the Block" Lopez and Ben Affleck were a thang) has a new cinematic release that has been blowing critics away left and right. The Town is a film about bank robbers in the notoriously crime ridden town of Charlestown, Massachusetts. The cops and robbers story sound done before? Yes. But, Ben Affleck truly outdoes himself in this film with a fantastic, gritty performance as well as all the other actors that co-star along side him.

The central story however is the relationship he ends up developing with a woman they take captive momentarily after one of his crew's heists. His job is to keep an eye on her and make sure she doesn't have any information that might bring trouble for him and his fellow band of criminals. Sure enough, it turns into a weird version of the 'Nightingale Syndrome' and instead of the nurse falling for the patient, the criminal falls for his victim. Hey, anything goes in movieland.

I wasn't sure if I was going to like how this story ended with the direction it was going 3/4 of the way through. I was getting a gut feeling that something crazy was going to happen to completely ruin the good hour and a half of character development I was pretending to understand. However, I walked out the theater truly impressed but the incredible portrayal of Massachusetts criminals, cops and damsels in distress each actor in this film portrayed. I mean, how can you not be nominated for an Oscar when playing an bank robber dressed as a nun wielding an automatic weapon?! Pay attention Academy! You've got work to do!

Gleek Out!

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 23:11:00 +0000

The Lady has been mighty absent...my sincerest apologies. But you better believe I can't keep quiet for too long, especially with the big bowl of crazy that is our pop culture scene. With that said, I'll be on my best behavior and give you all glorious nuggets of useless information you can carry with you wherever you go starting with this....

GLEE IS BACK! Woo hoo!

I'll be honest, wasn't too impressed with the season three premiere. It wasn't very dynamic, Lea Michele's "Rachel Berry" character was twice as annoying (how that's possible I have no idea), and it just didn't grab me like every other episode has for two seasons. I have to cut it some slack though, a lot happened in the last season with babies being born, Sue Sylvester's undeniable awesomeness and the poor Glee kids' defeat at regionals. There's still plenty to digest and I have faith that the season will only improve.

Tonight is the much anticipated Britney "Apparently I'm Still Famous When I'm Crazy" Spears episode that Glee and Spears fans alike bound together and campaigned for the homage to the pop princess. I'm more excited for this episode because it will (hopefully) spotlight my personal favorite character on the show, blonde, ditzy and always delivering amazing one-liners Cheerio, Brittany (Heather Morris).

It will no doubt be interesting but I'm still getting back in the grove of watching a television show where people randomly burst out into song and dance. Am I losing my Gleekness? Not likely, just have to get my groove back and start drinking the Kool-Aid again and I'll be back in business! Don't let me down Glee! You've lasted two seasons and won a couple of awards, congratulations, but keep your eye on the prize, don't get lazy and start to stray from what made you amazing. Good luck!

HOT MESS OF THE WEEK: Lindsay Lohan

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 02:42:00 +0000

Three times on my list boo-boo? Really?! You're giving me waaaaay too much material to work with.

Lindsay Lohan, you are going to jail! About damn time. I'm sorry, but anyone who has any sympathy for this train wreck needs to reevaluate the functions of their brain. The reality is, bad choices have direct consequences and no matter who you are, you're going to need to face them eventually. Honestly love, how much longer do you think you were going to avoid them?

After back and forth between alcohol programs and court dates, Lindsay Lohan is finally paying for her very, very bad decisions and serving 90 days (supposedly) in jail for probation violations and simply being an all around jackass. So sad to see your story take this direction, love. You have so much potential and you're throwing it all away for a few lines of coke, a couple one-night stands, and being constant tabloid fodder. I'm sure this wasn't a part of your life plan, if you even had one, but hopefully this gives you a much needed reality check. You aren't above the law and need an ass whoopin'. Hopefully you do a real stint in jail and not that couple of hours crap that Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie did because of "overcrowding." Suck it up boo-boo and back down on the appeals, this will definitely do you some good. So I guess from now until you have to surrender to the California prison system and serve your sentence, Lindsay Lohan, you are AGAIN the Hot Mess of the Week.

Woman to Woman

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 03:33:00 +0000

I love Alicia Keys, but we're all human and I think it's time to put her on blast for a second.

I can't hate on anyone that is able to find true love and work to make it blossom into this life changing force that seems like it can move mountains, BUT is it worth it at the expense of the another person's relationship? In recent comments by the not yet ex-wife of Alicia Keys' love/soon-to-be baby's daddy, hip hop producer Swizz Beats, one has to wonder if the 'Super Woman' songstress did some trashtastic misdeeds to get her man...

Ms. Keys has been put on blast with gold nugget sound bites from Swizz Beats almost-ex-wife basically calling her a home wrecker with not much else coming out of the Keys camp in defense, or at least what I've been able to unearth. I'm not in their business; you know us black folks, we're not too likely to get all Jerry Springer in the public eye unless it REALLY got to the point where earrings needed to be taken off and somebody was about to get an ass whoopin'. I think the ladies are trying not to get 'hood' at this point and keeping disputes under wraps; but you can't help to wonder what's really going on.

Did this musical icon that's been portraying this image of class and female empowerment pull a fast one on another woman, turning her world upside down for her own personal satisfaction, or did she just have awkward timing on a relationship already on the rocks? It's tough to hear this happening to anyone but it gets really nasty when played out in the media. But we as a society are quick to hop on the woman and tend to forget that the man is usually just as, if not more (most of the time more) at fault for all the mess. Shame on you Swizz Beats! Not even divorced and already having a child by another woman...eck. I guess only time will tell how this mess of a fairy tale will end. Hopefully everyone gets what they truly deserve at the end of the day. So sad a baby has to go through this too. Hang in there pumpkin!

HOT MESS OF THE WEEK: The Bachelor

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 02:35:00 +0000

Is there ANYONE left in the world that genuinely believe they can find true love in a few weeks on national television? The most recent Bachelor couple to bite the dust is Jake and Vienna. I don't think I've watched the show since the first season because the whole rose ceremony was a bit much for me. Women falling over themselves for a man they barely know in hopes this guy is their future baby's daddy just didn't strike a chord. Apparently it did with enough women and men with issues that its continued to trample the 'true love' dreams of Americans for fourteen seasons. Fourteen?! ABC, we need to talk.

I expect dating shows like Flavor of Love, Rock of Love, and For the Love of Ray J to be steamy piles of ridiculousness but that's VH1, clearly a network station would know better... Nah, they don't care, it's bringing in the ratings and hearts continue to be broken. Reunion show gold! When is the madness going to end? Hasn't there been only one couple to actually stay together, let alone make it down to the alter?ABC, please put this show out it's misery. But I guess that's why it's called the Bachelor; he comes in a bachelor and even after that whole song and dance, he still leaves a bachelor. Ladies, if you're looking for a man, go where everyone else is going these days....the internet.

Skankasaurus-rex Strikes Again

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 22:56:00 +0000

I think it's time to give Miley Cyrus a break. Not sure how I missed her but there's a new teeny-bopper in need of an intervention...immediately.

Do you watch Gossip Girl? Neither do I, but apparently their 16-year-old lead actress is skankasaurus-rex's most recent victim. Taylor Momsen has been getting the Miley Cyrus treatment as of late for her taste for the...umm...tasteless? The teenage television sensation is all of a sudden in a rock band, The Pretty Reckless, and that's clearly a far cry from the privileged Manhattan trouble maker on Gossip Girl everyone has become so familiar with. However, the beef comes from her choice of on-stage attire she's been rockin'.

Yes, that girl is 16-years-old. I mean, is that really necessary? Now I have to admit, I've listened to a little The Pretty Reckless and they aren't half bad, why she believed they needed the Courtney Love look as well beats me. Rock stars will be rock stars but honestly, does she even have a driver's license? It's pretty scandalous but hey, Miley Cyrus is walking around with no undies on (allegedly). But let's look at this for a second. She went from being Cindy-Lou Who (yes, that was her in the 2000 live-action version of How the Grinch Stole Christmas) to Courtney love's doppelganger in a matter of ten years, she's growing up and being a rebellious, experimenting, I know everything and hate the world teenager.

As much as I hate to admit it, I even went through a weird grungy stage and quickly grew out of it, but this "dark, need to have large black circles around me eyes" thing might be her...thing. Does that mean it's completely okay to wear teeny mini dresses and 6 inch heels? That's up to her parents. If they don't care if their baby girls goes outside looking like a half-dead vampire hooker, why should we. My only hope is that she only wants to look like the hot mess Courtney Love and not want to repeat her life. Make better decisions boo-boo. Youth only lasts so long, don't end up regretting it.

NOW HEAR THIS!!! - Metric

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 04:11:00 +0000

Hello Canada!

Aside from being featured on the recent Twilight Saga: Eclipse soundtrack, the Canadian indie rock band Metric have some redeeming qualities. I kid. I was listening to the radio the other day and their latest single "Gold Guns Girls" came on and I was jammin' (in that I'm indie and too cool to jam to music kind of way)! Lead singer Emily Haines has a beautifully haunting voice; when backed with the band's new wave-esque sound makes their music really worth a listen. I guess that's why the Twi-hards wanted to include them on their mash-up of angsty, moody teenage girl, vamp-friendly soundtrack.

I took a listen to the rest of their 2009 release Fantasies featuring "Gold Guns Girls" as well as another new favorite of mine "Help I'm Alive." It got a tad too emo-indie for me at a few points but still a very nice, smooth listen. A definite iTunes download for sure. Check 'em out!

(Photo via ILoveMetric.com)

I'll Take Auto-Tune for $200 Please

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 03:56:00 +0000

Dear friends,

Have you laughed today?

You know you can't ever get away from auto-tune when it makes and appearance on Jeopardy! Seriously?! Damn you T-Pain for breathing new life into this incredibly annoying but somewhat entertaining piece of technology! I found a lovely gem of none other that Jeopardy host Alex Trebek getting in on the action. If it's been a long week for you so far, check out the pretty funny clip below and have a belly laugh on me.

It's Playtime!

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 03:25:00 +0000

Please make plans this weekend (if you haven't seen it already) to go see Toy Story 3. Pixar has done it again and made another fantastic film that appeals to both children and adults and leave everyone in the theater with a feeling of fulfillment and happiness. Ok yes, I sound like a freaking Hallmark card but I can't help it. No, it doesn't necessarily top Up but it gets pretty darn close.

I won't spoil anything for you BUT they ended the franchise in a very touching and appropriate way. As a matter of fact, I'd say the third movie was better than the second, but the first still reigns supreme in my mind. If you're looking for laughs, reminiscing about childhod, and a good cry (yes, even you thugs will tear up a bit), see this movie. Avoid 3-D though, it was cool, but not worth the extra $7 or so. It's great to finally see Andy all grown up and the entire toy box crew all together again getting into new trouble. Can you believe Toy Story came out in 1995?! Fifteen years later it's still amazing and enchanting a whole new group of kids with big imaginations.

We need more movies like this. I want more warm and fuzzies and animation in my life. Keep them coming Pixar! Does it make me a creeper if I went to Toys 'R' Us tonight to get a Woody Doll and Buzz Lightyear? I'm tapping into my inner kid damnit! Let's do this! :^P

Miley Got Her Wings...Sort Of

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 01:30:00 +0000

As we are all very well aware, Miss Miley "Should Probably Be Tamed" Cyrus has bust loose from the Disney pack and taken a page from the Britney Spears Book 'O Skanky-Teen-Queen-Sensations and hit the mainstream music scene with an...er...um..edgier appeal? Whatever letting your cookies hang out is supposed to be. And like Ms. Spears, little Miss Miley is getting crazy backlash; she could care less because sista is getting paid and she sees her own multi-platinum selling, worldwide stardom, inevitable shaved head manic-depressive future in front of her and she's ecstatic!

I have no doubt Papa Cyrus is looking at all of the negative press she's getting as simply her walking in the stiletto-prints of Britney Spears and cannot wait to start raking in the cash. However, might I point out a glaring difference between the Disney alum...no, Ms. Spears is no vocal powerhouse but the woman can really, really put on a show and command a stage; Miley Cyrus, eeeh not so much and she sounds like she's been smoking since she was 9-years-old.

Miley Cyrus - New Music - More Music Videos

And now there's the drama of some scandalous pics over her coochie floating around the internetwebs a paparazzo accidentally took and landed on PerezHilton.com. Oye! Number one, Perez, even though I do like him, is a steamy hot mess and is loving the drama, so hate on haters he could care less that he's being painted as a Z-list, played-out pedophile...by media outlets...everywhere. And number two, it was an accident! Yes, she has morphed into a skankasaurusrex but she'll be laughing all the way to the bank and I'm sure flashing the goodies was not in the equation (it wasn't right?).

Technically, she has more clothes on than the average 17-year-old American girl so I don't see what people are freaking out about. She's not Hannah Montana anymore just like Britney Spears grew out of her Mouseketeer ears. They've got to get grown at some point America...even the ones you wish could stay cute and sassy forever. But don't worry, she's bound to have some train wreck of a nervous break down and we'll all be there for her every step of the way....ridiculing every move. God Bless America!

When Does Unemployment Equal Retirement?

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 02:51:00 +0000

Big news! Actress Amanda Bynes announces her retirement!

Wait, Amanda who? Yes, my initial reaction as well. Then I thought about it for a second and remembered, it's that chick from What A Girl Wants (2003). Still not ringing a bell, she was also the skinny sidekick to Nikki Blonsky in Hairspray (2007). If you still don't know who I'm talking about, my point exactly. Who cares?!

She's always been one of those cute, Disney-esque, love-to-love actresses that has had funny roles in sitcoms and romantic comedies but apparently now wants out of Hollywood all together. And get this, the baby is only 24. Yes, 24 and retiring. I guess I'm scratching my head because she hasn't been in anything major, she's an okay actress, but why she felt it necessary to announce to the world that she's retiring because she's sick of acting instead of just not doing it anymore and start doing something different leads me to believe...sista just wasn't getting any jobs.

I'm not calling into question her acting chops but it just seems like a cop out to me. I'd LOVE to see one of the millions of Americans out of work right now who haven't been able to snag decent work announce their 'retirement.' That would be sad and remotely hilarious all at the same time. Now I'm just giving her a hard time (because I'm a blogger and that's my job), but maybe she is just tired of acting and wants to explore other options. I'm sure casting couch hopping is getting exhausting and What A Girl Wants royalties are getting a little slim. I kid, I kid!

More power to you I guess love. Maybe Lindsay Lohan should take a cue from Bynes and just 'retire.' Or maybe Bynes should take a play from the Lohan book and do really, really stupid stuff to get back in the media because I'm getting the feeling this may just be for a little attention. Maybe this is her attempt to show her dramatic side and get better acting roles flowing through the pipeline. Don't worry love, with your credentials you'll be landing gigs on Lifetime or ABC Family in no time! Good luck!

HOT MESS OF THE WEEK: Lindsay Lohan

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 02:20:00 +0000

Here's some not so surprising news....

Hot Mess of the Week -- Lindsay "Can't Seem to Get Her S@#t Together" Lohan! Congratulations boo-boo, you are my first celebrity to make a repeat appearance as my HMOTW list. I'm praying for you, really, but you have to cut the foolishness.

See, since I've been out on vaca and trying to catch up on all the craziness in pop culture world, the one thing all my backlogged headlines had in common was something about Lohan and it made me very, very sad. Let's see where should I start the recap...

- Apparently the only movie roles she's able to get these days are about cracked out, washed up porn stars (Linda Lovelace; who she's just giddy about playing)
- She keeps violating court orders and doesn't seem to realize that if do that, it's illegal, and a judge will put that pretty behind in jail
- Her assistant quit on her and apparently her life is in shambles because she literally can't do anything for herself any more (like driving or keeping quite possibly career saving appointments)
- There is now a SCRAM (Secure Continuous Remote Alcohol Monitor) bracelet on her ankle to keep an eye on her drinking shenanigans, however it mysteriously keeps going off and she has blamed it on everything from spilled drinks to tea products with an unusual ingredient...alcohol. Honestly!

Oh honey, you are just one big, steamy hot mess and I'm not sure what else can be done. I was in your cheering section but you are looking more and more like a lost cause. Can someone give Miss Lohan an intervention please! Don't let all that talent and the still somewhat attractive face go to waste. Wait, does she even remember how to act? When was the last time she had a decent gig and was she even any good? We can't keep replaying Parent Trap and Mean Girls in our heads darling. Give us something to talk about besides your tragic life. We miss our sassy red head. Take a minute, get it together, and start from scratch...we'll wait. Until then, you are AGAIN the Hot Mess of the Week.

Zach Anner May Take Over the World

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 02:55:00 +0000

Who knew the next television star would be a wheelchair bound 25-year-old man with cerebral palsy. Austinite Zach Anner has made quite the impression on America as of late while auditioning for the opportunity to have his own show on the Oprah Winfrey Network (OWN). Check out his pretty hilarious audition submission if you weren't one of the oh, say 2 million+ people who have.

As a University of Texas alum, I am very familiar with Zach. He too is a Texas Ex and showcased his hilariousness all around campus and to be frank, I didn't know how to take it at the time. I was the average 19-year-old kid who wasn't sure it was 'okay' to laugh at someone with cerebral palsy. Luckily, I eventually saw past the disability and only saw how truly funny he was. He's a natural comedian with a pretty big heart. He's an inspiration to many and deserves all the accolades he receives.

But the skeptic in me wonders, is America really ready for the "sexiest of the palsies?" Well, they sure better be because according to the OWN Network competition website, Zach could very well win this thing and have his own travel show. But are we genuinely interested in seeing his show or just wanting to satisfy our morbid curiosity? Zach is really funny and quite inspirational especially to those who have disabilities proving that no matter your obstacles, you can truly achieve anything.

Hey OWN television execs, don't exploit our boy. Help him make his dreams come true and see his true potential and not his novelty. It might take some time for people to see past the disability, but hopefully they'll have the same epiphany I did...the man is talented and just happens to be in a wheelchair. More power to you Zach! Anner FTW!

NOW HEAR THIS!!! - Big Boi

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 03:48:00 +0000

Big Boi is back!

The hip hop gods have been good to this Lady as of late. Even though I just may pee myself with excitement when I hear a new Outkast album is coming out, I'm good for now because 1/2 of the hip hop duo, Big Boi, has released a new single "Shutterbugg" and it's HOT! With all this club banging music coming through this summer, I may just have to amp up my party throwing and EVERYONE will be invited (that means you Canada!).

Not sure why, but I'm getting a little flashback to some old school rap feel with this one, even down to the base beat and background vocals. Just a little, not too much, just enough to get me to make the stank face. You know, the face you make when you're really feeling a hot track. I made the same face with Jamie Foxx's "Winner." Haha Oh, and thank you sir for not falling prey to the overload of auto-tune and sticking to what you do best, staying so fresh and so clean, clean with your flow. Okay, yes, a little cheesy, but I don't care. I'm a fan, that's what we do. But a word of advice, please make sure your accompanying music video doesn't suck. I've had enough of that foolishness to last me a lifetime. Check out "Shutterbugg," the inevitable new summer hit!

The ShamWow Guy Gets a Job

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 02:42:00 +0000

Dear friends,

Have you laughed today? I've you haven't, guess what, my favorite person to laugh at is back and can give you a chuckle. Remember the ShamWow guy (Vince Shlomi), yes, that obnoxious, overly zealous infomercial guy that got his ass kicked by a prostitute and tries to sell you a towel that seems to be able to soak up the Pacific Ocean at 3 a.m., well he got a job. A hilarious new viral vid has him now hawking hip hop phenom, Eminem's upcoming album Recovery. I'm already excited about this album so it's only icing on the cake that one of my favorite television dimwits is somehow involved. Take a peak!

Entertainment Blasphemy

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 01:45:00 +0000

I'm not sure how I feel about the new Lady Gaga video for her latest single from The Fame Monster, "Alejandro." Before I continue, take a look and form your own opinion...Oh and it's almost 9 minutes long...might want to grab some chips.

Ok, let the weirdness settle in...I'll give you a minute.

Was you're favorite part when she swallowed a rosary, because I know it was mine! (sarcasm) The best thing that came out of this clusterf@#$k of a music video is the delicious backlash she's been getting, specifically from one of my favs, Katy "California Gurl" Perry; I must say, the girl makes a valid point.

Recently, Perry has come out throwing a fit on how Gaga opted for straight up blasphemy in her Alejandro music video for the sake of raising eyebrows and stirring up chit-chat. If you were able to sit through the 9 minute video, you'll see Gaga decked out in kinky, red leather nun outfits, or cloaks with an upside down cross taped on her crotch, and of course swallowing a rosary. Now, call me crazy, but Gaga never struck me as the religious type so I'm sure she doesn't give a damn what anyone says, but still the question remains, is it really worth the 'excommunication' to diss JC for the sake of your personal/commercial art?

When is too far really too far? Is there no bounds for shock and awe? Clearly the best performers didn't care and are still going strong; Madonna, Prince, KISS, Ozzy Osbourne, the list goes on. Those people are legends and there's no doubt Gaga is trying to secure her place among giants, but only time will tell. Nowadays I just want to hear the music. There's such great music out there but then artists feel the need to add a layer of nonsense that only distracts and not enhances.

Perfect example, freaking M.I.A. No, I'm not a big fan of the British rapper but I did kind of like her newest single "Born Free"....until I saw its awful, awful, awful music video. I won't even post it on my site because of how horrible it is. But unless you've been living under a rock, it's gotten a ton of press for how unnecessarily explicitly violent it is; complete detracts from the song and it's underline message. If you're an artist, fine, express yourself artistically, but do keep in mind you're not just sharing this with yourself, you're sharing it with the world! If it's truly beautiful, let us see it and not be overshadowed by the way you choose to deliver it....I'm just sayin'.

Welcome to My Glee/Twilight Nightmare

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 03:15:00 +0000

Boys and girls.....hell has frozen over.

At first I thought this was joke but this shiz is for real; ugh, just used a Perez Hilton-esque word, that's how seriously ridiculous this is. Recently premiering at the Seattle International Film Festival was the movie "I Kissed A Vampire" that can best be described as a Glee-like Twilight with the production value of daytime soap operas. Wait, I think my brain just exploded.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE Glee but Twilight almost makes me regret being literate. Putting those two together just seems like ten kinds of wrong. It may be in fashion to sporadically burst out in song and dance while in the middle of a dialogue but it is not always the best idea. The plot on this inevitable steamy pile of disappointment is something along the lines of a guy gets bitten by a vampire and is trying to save himself and 'the girl he loves' from another crazy vampire while trying to find a cure to make them stop being vampires, all accompanied buy original music and choreography that even Disney would pee itself for.

I really don't know what to say. I am definitely not the demographic so I'm sure they don't care what I think. But still...tweens, I hope even you can see the craziness that is about to ensue. Not everything has to be a musical and I'm really over the vampire thing. If one more television show is made about over-sexed blood suckers...I may vomit. Originality, table for zero? Come one Hollywood, you've got more where that came from...unless that sucks too. I think I'll watch Get Him to the Greek again and re-run of Friends.

Eww! Nasty! Yuck!

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Mon, 14 Jun 2010 00:20:00 +0000

SERIOUSLY?!?!

If I hear about another 'reality star' with a sex tape, I'm going vomit, pass out, and vomit again. Skankasaurus-Rex television fools Hugh Hefner's ex, Kendra "I Bang Old Guys and Athletes" Wilkinson and Real Housewives of New Jersey Danielle "Hot Mess Hussy" Staub both have shameless footage of them doing the naked hooty booty floating around and neither seem to care. Well, Kendra was slightly mortified at first, with her being a new mommy and all, but that's pretty rich coming from a woman who doesn't see anything wrong with having a stripper pole in her bedroom claiming her son will be proud of her skills. Really?! Have you been snorting your ex's Viagra?

The killer thing is Kendra now wants to cash in and Jersey's Danielle doesn't seem to be phased; she actually seems excited about this "leaked" tape. Grooooooosss. I'm sorry, I don't want to see anything these ladies have going on underneath their hardly there, tacky clothing. Are you that desperate for press that you're willing to basically whore yourself out to whoever is willing to watch? What's even more disturbing is that I've seen the recently surfaced stills from the Danielle tape and yes, she knows what she's doing. No, I'm not talking about that (get your mind out the gutter)! It seems like she knows this will get out and is really hamming it up.

And if you're going to put your cookies out there, at least make sure your boob job at least comes across even on camera. Yes, her girls are lopsided and it makes me uncomfortable. I haven't seen the Kendra tape but I'm sure I'll have the same gag reflex. But the up side is, I know her boob job is solid; Playboy doesn't skimp on that necessity. I guess I just don't see why these ladies think a sex tape is the key to success. It might have worked for Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian but they aren't taken seriously. Then again, that's probably not anyone's intent. So sad. I think I'll take the direction of not being a Hollywood laughing stock, thank you.

NOW HEAR THIS!!! - Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 23:16:00 +0000

Now this a little different for me, but I really like it. I was randomly switching radio station channels in my car on my way home and stumbled upon this kind of western/indie/folksy/rock sound that really grabbed my attention. A little out of my element on this one but "Home" by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros (yes, I'd really like to see how that name will work out on a t-shirt) is really catchy and I could definitely listen too over and over again. Not bad for a horde of hippies.

Really listen to the lyrics on this one though:

Alabama Arkansas I do Love my Ma and Pa
But not as much as I do Love you
Holy Moly Me oh My your the apple of my eye
Girl ain't never loved one like you
Man o' Man your my best friend I scream it to the nothingness
That we got everything we need
Hot and Heavy pumpkin pie
Chocolate candy Jesus Christ
Ain't nothin' please me more than you

Let me come Home
Home is Whenever I'm with you
Home, yes I am Home
Home is wherever I'm with you

Uncomplicated, sounds like a hippie wrote, and it's great. Kind of a throw back to pop music pre-boy band and pop/rock craziness; the change is greatly appreciated. They're on tour right now; if you're interested check them out, I'm sure it'll be a great show. Austin's on list, maybe I can get a hook up ::wink, wink:: Hopefully you just found your new guilty pleasure. You're welcome.

Drugs, Sex, and Russell Brand

noreply@blogger.com (Lady A) — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 21:58:00 +0000

I didn't think I could see something as funny as The Hangover any time soon, but director Nicholas Stoller and producer, Judd Apatow, does not fail to bring the funny in this rompous, over-the-top, undeniably Jonah Hill-esque hilarity in Get Him to the Greek. No, it isn't as hysterical as The Hangover, but it gets pretty damn close.

The basic premise of the movie (if for some weird reason you're still on the fence), Jonah Hill plays Aaron Green, a funny, Los Angeles record company assistant who is instructed to bring burnt out, drug addict rock star Aldous Snow (Russell Brand) from London to L.A. to play an anniversary gig for Snow's band at The Greek Theater as a way to help make money for Green's faltering record label. Sounds easy enough right? Wrong! Apparently babysitting a rock star isn't a piece of cake.

A part of me has (and probably still...a little) always wanted to work with a record label doing just that. Get paid to globe trot with crazy rock stars and their entourages, eat and drink at the best restaurants, party at the hottest clubs, get other free stuff just because I'm with the rock star? Hell yes! Who wouldn't want that?! Oh wait, unless you're Aaron Green and you have to deal with Aldous Snow who's demanding you to stuff a balloon of heroin in your butt before you get on plane. Eck. You'll have to see the movie.

By the way, Russell Brand should probably stick with the look he's rocking in this movie. Even though I'm not a big fan of scrawny men in skinny jeans (it just creeps me out); yet he nixed the rat's nest he usually sports on his head, opted for a long, wavy look and cleaned up pretty nice, well, nice enough for a drug addicted, self-destructive, burnt out rock star. Hot! If you're looking for something to do this summer, make sure Get Him to the Greek is on your list!