A Closed Mouth Gathers No Food

Stong Itch for a 'Wich and a Deep Regard for Chard

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Thu, 16 May 2013 16:12:00 +0000

"Too few people understand a really good sandwich." ~James Beard

Hethyr: Though I try my best to eat at least three meals a day, some days it's damned near impossible. Sometimes breakfast is an apple. On occasion, lunch is a handful of cashews. And when Jon isn't home, dinner is usually a bowl of popcorn. I really do try my best to eat a balanced plate at each meal, but when I'm busy cooking for several other families and teaching yoga I'm lucky if I get to eat at all on certain days. Even if I have a bit of time when I'm home alone, I'm not usually one to really cook a meal just for myself. I might make a quick gluten-free sandwich or throw together a simple salad, but it's rare for me to pull out a skillet or turn on the oven when it's just me.

This was breakfast this morning. Oops.

However, when we're out of those quick and easy throw together things and I have a few extra minutes, I need to get creative if I want to eat. After an early-morning yoga class, a 35-minute drive to my chiropractor's office, and a bit of client cooking, I actually had about 30 minutes to myself before having to run out again. I checked the cupboards and fridge for a quick bite to eat and came up empty-handed. After a more thorough search, I discovered the last little end of a homemade loaf of gluten-free bread, a small chunk of goat brie, an apple, and some sliced turkey. I had also purchased some red chard a few days before to satisfy a craving... yep, apparently I get cravings for chard now. Wouldn't Momma be proud? Nope. Knowing my Momma, she'd probably be grossed out and ask what was wrong with me. We have both pretty much despised dark, leafy greens (except for raw spinach) most of our lives. And yet I actually made a trip to the store specifically to get chard. What the hell? Well, when my body tells me it needs something, I try to listen!

My most recent craving. What?!

Anyway, I decided to pull not one, but TWO small skillets out for this meal. La-dee-freakin'-da. Guess I felt like treating myself! I would say poor Jon since he was at school and didn't get to partake in my masterpiece, but he took homemade lasagna to school for lunch yesterday and some yummy venison and veggie cabbage rolls today. Poor Jon, my ass. Once in a while I deserve a special meal, too! ;) Hope you enjoy this super-easy, super-delicious homemade lunch... though it would work just as well for a simple dinner.

Gluten-Free Grilled Turkey, Apple & Goat Brie Sandwich with Sautéed Chard

Serves 1

2 slices gluten-free bread (here's my favorite recipe that I adapt for high altitude)

Few slices goat brie

Several thin apple slices

1-2 slices turkey

1-2 tablespoons ghee (or vegan butter substitute)

1 large chard leaf with stem, chopped

1 garlic clove, minced

1 teaspoon olive oil

1. Layer one slice of gluten-free bread with half of the goat brie, all of the apple and turkey slices, the rest of the brie, and the other slice of bread.

2. Melt ghee or vegan butter.

2. Heat a small skillet over medium heat and add half of the melted ghee. Add sandwich and cook until bottom slice of bread is golden-brown. Brush uncooked bread with remaining ghee, then carefully flip sandwich and cook until second slice of bread is golden and cheese is melted. Remove from skillet and set aside.

3. While sandwich is cooking on the second side, heat another small skillet over medium-high heat and add olive oil. When pan is hot, add chard and garlic and cook until wilted, about a minute or two. Remove from pan and plate.

4. Cut sandwich in half if desired and plate with cooked chard. Enjoy!

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Jon: If there is one thing I can truly appreciate in this world, it is a delicious sandwich. I suppose that's because a sandwich has been one of my two edible staples throughout most of my life. The other one would be that miraculous, wondrous, holiest of all holy meals... cereal. If it weren't for cereal, I would probably have wasted away years ago. But I digress.

Admittedly, my sandwiches used to be pretty disgusting... a couple slices of Wonderboy, a factory-cut slab of meat product, and a square of American "cheese." That's the problem with sandwiches. The boredom is undeniable. A sandwich is like the Bob Dole of the food world. But perhaps even Bob Dole can grow a mohawk, get a "Thug Life" tattoo, and base jump the Eiffel Tower. Maybe, just maybe. So it seems that a sandwich can get a little provocative and alluring, and dare I say... sexy? Not that I'm saying I'm aroused by the thought of Bob Dole with a mohawk. Um, I swear.


Bob Dole serving sandwiches wearing an apron. If only he was sporting a mohawk... (Photo from the Robert J. Dole Institute of Politics archives)

Giving a sandwich some personality is an art form. Apples do it. Avocados do it. Spicy Tomato Jam (R.I.P.) does it. And according to my wife, who is one-step away from injecting chard directly into her veins, chard does it, too. Versatility and creativity are crucial to a life-long marriage between human and sandwich.

Long live the sandwich.

I'll Have a Bloody Mary, a Steak Pizza, and a Steak Pizza

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 00:26:00 +0000

Hethyr: If we could eat pizza for dinner every night and not feel guilty about it, we probably would. I know we've already done several pizza posts, but we haven't yet done this pizza post. Bear with me - it's worth it.

While Jon was out of town recently, I was craving pizza so badly that I went out and picked up the ingredients (including goat cheese, which I've been allowed to add back in!), got home and realized I didn't have any crust, then debated whether to make my own or drive back across town for some already prepared gluten-free, vegan crust that is really, really good. Not just acceptable, but actually good. The stuff that I make at home is really good, too, but it takes a decent amount of effort. I decided on convenience on the day in question. And while I was at the bakery, I picked up two more packs of crusts (each pack contains two).

Pre-baking and cheese

So, we had this one crust left in the refrigerator from the pack I opened while he was gone, and we had a little bit of leftover steak with sauce. With a few other items on hand, we had an incredible dinner... definitely one worth sharing! I love that some of my best recipes are inspired by leftovers, and that nothing goes to waste in this house! You get a bonus from this post, too, because you can have the flank steak for dinner on the first night and use the leftovers for the pizza the second night. Enjoy!

Night #1...

Marinated Flank Steak

http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/grilled_marinated_flank_steak/

*** Note: We use tamari (gluten-free soy sauce) and we always save the marinade, boil it, then use it as a dipping sauce for the steak. You'll need it for the pizza recipe...

Night #2...

Gluten-Free Steak & Chard Pizza

Serves 2-3

2 teaspoons olive oil

1 large Swiss chard leaf (including stem), chopped

1 large shallot, thinly sliced

2 tbsp cornstarch

2 tbsp cold water

1/2 cup reserved, cooked marinade from Marinated Flank Steak (see above)

1 prepared gluten-free pizza crust (or make your own... here's the best recipe)

Approx. 6 ounces leftover Marinated Flank Steak, thinly sliced and cut into bite-size pieces

8 ounces cheddar-style goat cheese, shredded

1. Place pizza stone on center rack of oven and preheat oven to 450°F for at least 30 minutes.

2. Heat oil in a medium skillet over medium heat. Add shallots and chard and sauté until just wilted, about 1-2 minutes. Remove from heat and set aside.

3. In a small dish, combine cornstarch and cold water and set aside.

4. Heat cooked, reserved marinade from flank steak in a small saucepan over medium heat. When simmering, whisk in cornstarch mixture and stir constantly until thick (should be a paste-like consistency). Remove from heat.

5. Top prepared crust with thickened marinade, shallot and chard, steak, and shredded goat cheese.

6. Bake on pizza stone for 12 minutes or until crust is golden-brown and cheese is bubbly.

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Jon: I noticed Hethyr said that if we could eat pizza every night for dinner and not feel guilty about it, then we would. Um, hello? I would feel no guilt. In fact, I would feel the opposite of guilt. What's the opposite of guilt? Joy. Bliss. Enlightenment, perhaps. In fact, with pizza everyday I would probably have a Buddha belly to accompany that enlightenment. Sweet.

What?! A Buddha wood fired brick oven!
Pizza & Buddha were meant to be together.
(Photo from backyardovensbook.com.au)

When Hethyr first told me the flank steak marinade would be entering the blogosphere, I must admit that I felt a little hesitant, like an over-protective father. A father to my flank steak... a flankster, if you will. Anyway, for many years, the flank steak recipe has been one of my only successful contributions to our regular cooking routine. Could I really let it go? After I - yes, I, not Hethyr - claimed ownership of this delicious, simple, sweet, savory, understated, satisfying marinade? This marinade that pairs with flank steak like peanut butter with jelly, like Mario with Luigi, like McDonalds with salmonella?

Then it dawned on me. I had just stolen the recipe from some website. Whoops. I guess that means it isn't mine. But I still feel proud that I found it myself, and even was capable of making it myself after stealing it. Wow, even I think that's pathetic. I'm lucky that Hethyr can cook, because I'm like Lennie from Of Mice and Men when it comes to kitchen skills.

Enjoy the pizza.

Much Love,

The Flankster

Curry Up Or You'll Sleep With The Fishes

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Fri, 12 Apr 2013 23:39:00 +0000

Hethyr: With the start of Spring already a few weeks in the past, I started thinking that maybe I should try to use up the remaining winter squash that we still have. We've still got a couple of Butternuts and Orange Hopis, but for this particular recipe I decided to use two small-ish Red Kuris that we received in our CSA.

It was a cold night and a warm soup sounded good - perfect for squash. Of course, because I'm a huge dork, I had to make it curry. If you'll remember back to our Valentine's blog post, Jon and I often speak in movie, and this Red Kuri Curry Soup reminded me of one of my favorite mob movies. See if you can figure out which one, which one...

Narrator: And then there was Jimmy Two Times, who got that nickname because he said everything twice, like:
Jimmy Two Times: I'm gonna go get the papers, get the papers.

Jimmy Two Times' Red Kuri Curry Soup

Serves 6-8

2 tablespoons coconut oil

1 large onion, chopped

1 medium celery stalk, chopped

1 medium carrot, chopped

1 small green bell pepper, seeded, ribbed and diced

2-inch piece of ginger, peeled and minced

1 small jalapeño, seeded, ribbed and minced

2 tablespoons curry spice blend

4 cups vegetable or chicken broth

1 cup coconut milk

2 Red Kuri squash, peeled, seeded and cut into 1-inch cubes

4 small kale leaves, ribbed and julienned

Salt and pepper, to taste

Cilantro, chopped for garnish

Peanuts or cashews, chopped for garnish

Lime wedges, for garnish

1. Heat coconut oil in a soup pot over medium heat; add onions, celery, carrots, bell pepper, ginger and jalapeno. Cook until veggies are just softened, about 5 minutes.

2. Add curry seasoning and stir for another minute.

3. Add broth, coconut milk, squash and kale and stir to combine. Bring to boil, then reduce heat to low, cover, and cook for 15 minutes or until squash is easily pierced with a fork.

4. Ladle into bowls, top with cilantro and nuts, and sprinkle with a little bit of lime juice.

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Jon: I'm gonna go get a spoon, get a spoon.

Tropical Snow Day!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 22:40:00 +0000

Hethyr: We had a heads-up that a big snow was coming our way yesterday, so after running errands in the morning, I decided to swing by Jon's school to switch cars in case the roads were bad on his way home. I got all of my stuff out of the Subaru and ready to load into the Piece of Shit - oops, I mean Jetta - when I realized the front passenger-side tire was flat - again. Oh, goody! With Jon needing to get back inside to pick up his kids from lunch, I offered to take care of the car myself. He, of course, insisted that I just drive the Subaru and said he'd deal with the flat after school, but being (way too) well-trained by my resourceful Dad in the art of changing tires, I told him I'd do it.

I call this one "Jetta on a Donut in the Snow."
Pure beauty. Um, yeah.

Mind you, I have probably changed upward of thirty tires in the twenty years I have been driving. Yes, I know that sounds like an exaggeration, but in college, I had a sweet little Nissan Sentra with pimped-out rims and when it would get cold (keep in mind that I lived in central Illinois at the time), I would inevitably get a flat tire. It was something about the metal expanding and contracting with the weather. Anyway, I have pretty much become a pro at changing flats. Once when I still worked in an office, a good friend walked out of work to a flat so she called her boyfriend and came back inside to wait for him. After she told me, I offered to at least take a look to see if I could help. By the time her boyfriend got there, I had the tire changed and we were just standing in the parking lot waiting for him. They were both pretty impressed. Although I'm sure my Dad knew he was teaching me a useful skill when he taught me to change a tire, I wonder if he had any idea of how indispensable this skill would become! :)

Needless to say, I changed the Jetta's tire without too many issues and left the Outback with Jon. I felt like I deserved a gold star or something for being wife-of-the-day, but instead I got a hot shower to get all of the grease off of me when I got home...

Oh, and I got rewarded with an honest-to-goodness SNOW DAY today... and so did Jon! Since both of us were home for the day, we slept in late (hey, 8am is late for us!) and decided on a tropical muffin breakfast against a blustery external backdrop. Happy snow day!!!

Coco-Maca-'Nana-Nut Muffins (Gluten-, Dairy-, and Refined Sugar-Free)

Makes 21-ish muffins

2 1/2 cups gluten-free flour mix

1/2 + 1/8 teaspoon xanthan gum

2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder (1 1/4 teaspoons for high altitude)

1 teaspoon salt

1 cup macadamia nuts, chopped

1/2 cup shredded coconut, toasted (divided use)

3 ripe bananas, mashed

2 extra-large eggs (I used turkey eggs)

1 cup maple syrup

4 tablespoons vegan butter, melted and cooled slightly, plus extra for greasing pans

1/4 cup macadamia nut butter

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

1 cup alternative milk (I used macadamia nut milk)

2 teaspoons apple cider vinegar

1. Preheat oven to 425F; grease muffin pans with a bit of melted vegan butter.

2. In a large bowl, mix together GF flour, xanthan gum, baking powder, salt, macadamia nuts, and 1/4 cup shredded coconut.

3. In a medium bowl, beat the eggs and bananas together. Add maple syrup, melted vegan butter, macadamia nut butter, and vanilla extract.

4. In a small bowl, mix the alternative milk with the apple cider vinegar; set aside.

5. To dry mixture, add about 1/3 of the banana mixture and stir until combined. Add about 1/3 of the alternative milk mixture and stir until combined. Repeat until all ingredients are well mixed.

6. Fill muffin cups about 3/4 full (if any cups are left empty, fill about halfway with water), then top with remaining toasted coconut.

7. Bake for 19-20 minutes or until golden brown on top. Cool in the pans for about 5 minutes, then transfer to wire racks to cool completely. Of course, we couldn't keep our hands off, so we ate about 1/3 of ours while they were still warm. :)

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Jon: I fondly remember the joy of the snow day as a child. Sleeping in late, eating a titanic breakfast, then playing twelve straight hours of Zelda on my Nintendo. As an older kid, when my interest in video games had withered away, I simply replaced my video game time with cable TV. A day that I thought was destined for applying brainpower to academics fortuitously became a teeny-tiny vacation destined for sedation and ignorance. It was a little slice of heaven.

I always imagined that the simple and unexpected solace of a snow day as a kid would never be matched. But I was mistaken, because I have discovered something even better. Much better. A snow day as a teacher.

Teaching first grade is way more exhausting than just participating. Don't get me wrong, I love my job. But I get paid? And I don't have to take a sub day? And I don't have to work at all? What? Hell yeah, snow! Admittedly, it is tempting to do schoolwork at home all day since I always have a hundred things to catch up on. But not today. Today I am destined to return to my roots... sleep in late, eat a titanic breakfast, and watch seven consecutive movies (with a bearded-brothers theme in loving memory of JR and Garr).

Here's to delicious snow-day muffins, a grease-monkey wife, Wes Anderson, Adam McKay, Garr, and JR.

JR and Garr - Bearded BFFs

We Go Together Like Chinese Food & Chocolate Pudding!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Tue, 19 Feb 2013 16:11:00 +0000

Hethyr: Jon and I sort of have our own little language. There are probably a few other nerds (or cable-less folks) out there who would understand it, but most people would think we're nuts if they heard us talking to each other much of the time. Several years ago - for many reasons - we decided to get rid of cable television. While less TV proved to be awesome, the silence in the house while either of us was home alone proved to be not so great sometimes, so we got in the habit of having a movie on in the background for noise. We only own so many DVDs and for a long time, we didn't have a way of watching streamed movies on anything other than one of our laptops. So, we got to know a select number of scripts INCREDIBLY WELL. Now we speak movie to each other most of the time. Lame? Maybe. But it would be REALLY lame if only one of us did it. At least we're both dorks, I guess.

With that being said, I saw this card while looking for something for Valentine's Day for him...

Not the greatest card in the world to the untrained eye/ear, I realize. But it immediately made me think of a few lines from Talladega Nights, an Adam McKay/Will Ferrell/John C. Reilly gem, which is in our very regular (embarrassingly so) movie repertoire. Okay, okay, we like really stupid humor - I admit it! So, I added a few choice words and made the card "my own"...

After getting sick with a fever and cough earlier this week, I wasn't up for dinner out on Valentine's Day (not that we would have ever thought to make reservations early enough anyway!), so I decided that as a treat for Jon (and, of course, for myself!), I'd make some gluten-, dairy-, and refined sugar-free pudding. I found a couple of good recipes here and here at the Gluten Free Fix blog. Only after deciding to make these did I realize the chocolate pudding reference in my card, so it was only fitting that I should make Chinese-ish food to go with it. In the morning, I gave Jon the card (which he loved, of course!) and later, I sent him a text to let him know that we were, in fact, having Chinese food and chocolate pudding for dinner and dessert. He responded by asking if he should bring home some peanut butter and ladies... or cocaine and waffles. Oh, my!

Anyway, I do realize that our last post was a recipe for a noodle bowl, but this one is quite different, fairly easy, and every bit as delicious. I hope you enjoy it, too!

Now You See Me, Now You Don't Chinese Bowlful o' Love (Gluten- and Dairy-Free)

Serves 2 (plus 2 servings of leftovers of the shrimp and veggies for lunch the next day so sick wifey doesn't have to cook!)

1-inch knob of ginger, peeled and minced

2 green onions, sliced

2 large garlic cloves, peeled and minced

1 small to medium head of broccoli, cut into florets

1 small yellow bell pepper, seeded, ribbed and sliced

2 large carrots, sliced

1 small bunch of bok choy, chopped

2 cups sugar snap peas or snow peas

1 pound shrimp, peeled, deveined, and cut into bite-size pieces

3 tablespoons tamari (gluten-free soy sauce)

3 tablespoons honey

3 tablespoons sweet chili sauce (I realize this isn't refined-sugar free but on a rare occasion, I've got to splurge a wee bit)

1 tablespoon oil

1 teaspoon sesame oil

4 ounces brown rice Pad Thai noodles

1. Prep all vegetables (ginger through peas) and shrimp.

2. In a small bowl, stir together soy sauce, honey and sweet chili sauce; set aside.

3. Cook rice noodles according to package directions; portion into bowls and keep warm, reserving a little of the cooking water.

4. In a large skillet or wok, heat oil and sesame oil over medium-high to high heat. Add ginger, green onions and garlic and stir-fry for approximately 30 seconds or until fragrant - be careful not to burn.

5. Add veggies to skillet and stir-fry for 2-3 minutes. Add shrimp and stir-fry for another 2-3 minutes or until shrimp is just cooked through and veggies are cooked but still crisp. Remove from skillet and toss with sauce.

6. To each noodle bowl, add plenty of veggies, shrimp, sauce, and a little bit of cooking water to reach your desired consistency of soupiness. Add chopsticks to make it more Chinese and serve with chocolate pudding for dessert! :)

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Jon: Hethyr, can I please have your attention. I've just been handed an urgent and horrifying news story. I need you to stop what you're doing and listen...

I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there. If you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you. You have an absolutely breath-taking... heiney. I mean, that thing's good. I wanna be friends with it. Mmmm. That sounds good. I'll have that.

You see, a pimp's love is very different from that of a square. We are like friends who ride majestic, translucent steeds, shooting flaming arrows across the bridge of Hemdale. I would follow you into the mists of Avalon, if that's what you mean. No one knows what it means, but it's provocative.

Really, if we went to a Halloween party dressed as Batman and Robin, I'd go as Robin. That's how much you mean to me. And we will dance till the sun rises. And then our children will form a family band. And we will tour the countryside and you won't be invited.

Little ham 'n eggs comin' at ya. What do you say we go out on a date? Have some chicken, maybe some sex... you know, see what happens. Me without you is Rice without Montana. Ali without Frasier. Han Solo without Chewbacca.

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking? We have so much in common, we both love soup and snow peas, we love the outdoors, and talking and not talking. We could not talk or talk forever and still find things to not talk about.

Great Odin's raven! Holy Santa Claus shit! Mind-bottling, isn't it? You know, when things are so crazy it gets your thoughts all trapped, like in a bottle? I'm in a glass case of emotion. It's more that comfortability. I fuckin' love you. And you got those. I like those on a woman.

I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful. Let's capture the dream.

POW!

Ice, Ice, Baby

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 03:03:00 +0000

Hethyr: Sometimes you just need an easy dinner, but for me that's not an easy task anymore. On just such an occasion during early Fall, we were also wicked-low on groceries (which usually just exacerbates the problem) so I went snooping through cupboards, refrigerators, freezers and pantries to come up with this beauty.

The night of the first freeze this year (while I was in Florida with my family during early October), I had Jon harvest everything possible out the garden... he was totally thrilled with me for that. Yes, dear - I realize I owe you! Everyone with a garden in Colorado Springs seemed to do the same thing that night, because Facebook statuses echoed our dilemma. After picking all of the zucchini from our 15 (yes, 15...) plants, pulling many of the carrots and harvesting the winter squash (one Hopi Orange was basketball size!), I asked him to harvest as much of the cilantro as he could. He cut plant after plant, wrapped them in paper towels and stowed them in the fridge in green bags for me to deal with when I got home. When I returned, I promptly forgot about the cilantro for at least a week-and-a-half. When I remembered it, I panicked and knew I had to do something with all of it immediately. I thought about drying it, but decided on other ways of using it instead. One of those ways was to make a boatload of Cilantro-Lime Dressing. Another way was to make Cilantro Oil and freeze it in little cubes, which have come in really handy on several occasions.

On previously mentioned night when I needed an easy recipe, these were two of the items I came across while on my hunt for acceptable ingredients. I also found some brown rice noodles, some frozen shrimp, a tomato, and a large zucchini. Hmm. Well, for one thing, all of those things sounded summery to me, so I figured I could come up with a way to work them all into one dish. And what a dish it was! This is one that we've had numerous times since, because it's versatile and oh, so easy. Oh, and did I mention it's GLUTEN-, DAIRY-, and REFINED SUGAR-FREE? Yep. :)

Shrimp and Cilantro Noodles

(Gluten-, Dairy-, and Refined Sugar-Free)

Not the greatest photo, but the taste was great!

Makes 2 large servings

3-4 tablespoons olive oil or cilantro oil

8 oz. shrimp, peeled and deveined

1/2 - 8 oz. package brown rice noodles

2 cups grated zucchini

Approximately 1/4 cup Cilantro-LimeVinaigrette (I substituted honey for the sugar)

Handful cherry or grape tomatoes or fresh tomato, diced

1. Cook brown rice noodles according to package directions; drain.

2. Heat 2 tablespoons of oil or cilantro oil in a large skillet over medium-high to high heat. Add shrimp and cook 1 to 1 1/2 minutes per side until just cooked through; remove and keep warm.

3. Add a touch more oil to the same skillet and add zucchini; cook 1-2 minutes.

4. Toss pasta with shrimp, zucchini, Cilantro-Lime Vinaigrette and tomatoes; serve immediately.

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Jon: I remember that week well... frantically chopping cilantro, zucchini, and squash out of the garden on the evening the frost arrived. This was followed by a truly pathetic attempt to save the remainder of the plants. As darkness descended and freezing rain began to fall, there I was, hammering wooden stakes into the ground and erecting various bedsheet-tents like some deranged lunatic, hoping that this thin cloth would miraculously save all the plants from certain death.

Our first zucchini... little did we know what was to come!

By the following morning, my cloth tents had soaked and turned to ice creating miniature igloos for the plants. The zucchini and squash plants were not fond of their new igloo homes, as was evident by their brown, shriveled, lifeless appearance. I dismantled the tents each morning and rebuilt them in the evening for several days in hopes of saving the onions and carrots. Ultimately, these hearty plants survived, probably due to their underground existence and no thanks to my stupid bedsheet-igloos.

Hooray for gardening!

No Mo' D'oh Dough!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Mon, 12 Nov 2012 03:35:00 +0000

Hethyr: WOW! Has it really been over four months since we last posted?! I knew it had been a while, but I didn't realize it had been THAT long.

Well, we've had a very eventful few months to say the least! We visited family in Florida and Illinois in late July and early August...

...Jon ran a marathon in early August...

...and started back to school mid-August...

...I was sick for most of September and my dear, sweet Dad passed away at the end of the month so I spent a couple of weeks at home in Florida with my family...

...and I've been spending the last few weeks playing catch-up with my business and our house and helping out the owners of the yoga studio where I work while they've been out of town. WHEW!!! Well, that pretty much brings you up to date. Well, almost...

I also found out in July that I have Lyme disease. Yep. You know all of those food sensitivity issues I've been dealing with for the past year-and-a-half? They're seemingly all related to the Lyme disease, which I've had for the last 13 YEARS. I've started a homeopathic treatment course, but it will probably be a LONG road of healing ahead!

With all of that said, I have a feeling you'll understand why we've been absent for a while. :) However, we do still plan on posting as we're able and maybe the blog will take a bit of a new direction with mostly gluten-free, dairy-free and refined sugar-free recipes (it's kind of veered in that direction lately, anyway). That's one of the great things about writing a food blog, I think - being able to adjust the recipes as needed for what's going on at the time. I hope this will help some of you who may be dealing with some of the same sensitivities.

In our last post, "Saturday Nut Fever," I promised you a gluten-free pizza recipe using the Faux 'Fredo Sauce. Not only will I give you that recipe, but I'll give you a couple more using the same yummy gluten-free crust. I am a total sucker for good pizza and that is probably one of the top three items that I miss after cutting out gluten (over a year ago) and dairy (in the last 6 months or so). Not usually being one to sit back and sulk because I'm not supposed to have it, I decided to go on a hunt for a GOOD gluten-free crust recipe. There are endless recipes for GF pizza dough, but most of them straight-up suck. Actually, come to think of it, I've NEVER had a GF pizza that I was thrilled with - I've always just settled because beggars can't be choosers... only now we can! This GEM of a recipe is one worth holding on to. If I can't tell that it's GF, I'm willing to bet that most others can't either. This dough is thin, crispy and oh-so-yummy! The recipe makes enough for eight pizzas, so I usually halve it and we still get pizza several times in one week. Or I make the whole batch, we have friends over, and we still wind up with enough for a couple more pizzas. Either way, it's pretty awesome. I haven't tried freezing the dough yet because we never have any left, but if I try that one of these days, I'll give you an update and let you know how it works.

Click HERE for the Gluten-Free Pizza Dough Recipe from "Healthy Bread in Five Minutes a Day" via Shooting the Kitchen. Note: After rolling out the dough, I usually brush most of the excess brown rice flour off of the top using a basting brush - it makes it much easier to spread out the sauce.

Gluten-Free Turkey and Bacon Faux 'Fredo Pizza (can also be Dairy-Free)

Makes one 14-inch pizza

Half mozzarella, half vegan cheese

1/2-pound (orange size portion) Gluten-Free Pizza Dough

Brown rice flour (for dusting)

1 cup (or more) Faux'Fredo Sauce

1 large onion, sliced

4 large garlic cloves, peeled and minced

6 ounce boneless, skinless turkey breast, cooked and thinly sliced

4 sliced applewood smoked bacon, cooked and crumbled

1 to 1 1/2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese or vegan mozzarella cheese (I use Daiya, but I prefer to go very light)

Fresh basil for garnish

1. Thirty minutes prior to baking, preheat oven to 500°F, with a baking stone placed on the middle rack.

2. Dust the surface of the refrigerated dough with brown rice flour and cut off a 1/2-pound (orange-size) piece. Dust with more rice flour and quickly shape into a ball. You will need to use lots of rice flour to prevent the dough from sticking to your hands or the work surface, but avoid working lumps of flour into the dough.

3. Liberally sprinkle brown rice flour onto a 14-inch square piece of parchment paper. Flatten the dough with your hands into an even circle, sprinkle generously with more rice flour, cover with another 14-inch piece of parchment paper, then roll the dough between the parchment to produce a very thin round (about 1/16- to 1/8-inch). Peel away the top piece of parchment paper, leaving the crust on the bottom piece.

4. Brush away most of the excess brown rice flour from the top of the dough, then spread a layer of Faux 'Fredo Sauce. Top with onions, garlic, turkey slices, crumbled bacon and shredded cheese or vegan cheese (or try half and half like we did).

5. Slide the pizza and parchment directly onto the baking stone. Check for doneness in about 12 minutes (parchment paper will turn black, which is fine).

6. Cool just slightly, top with fresh basil leaves, slice and serve.

Gluten-Free Pulled Pork Pizza (can also be Dairy-Free)

(Sorry... this one disappeared before we could snap a picture!)

Makes one 14-inch pizza

1 large onion, sliced

1 medium green bell pepper, seeded ribbed and sliced

1 tablespoon olive oil

1/2-pound (orange size portion) Gluten-Free Pizza Dough

Brown rice flour (for dusting)

1 cup (or more) gluten-free barbecue sauce, store-bought or homemade

4 large garlic cloves, peeled and minced

1 cup (or more) barbecue pulled pork (I use leftovers from a previous meal)

4 sliced applewood smoked bacon, cooked and crumbled

1 to 1 1/2 cups shredded provolone cheese or vegan mozzarella cheese (I use Daiya, but I prefer to go very light)

Fresh cilantro, for garnish

1. In a large skillet, sauté the onions and green bell pepper in olive oil until slightly softened.

2. Thirty minutes prior to baking, preheat oven to 500°F, with a baking stone placed on the middle rack.

3. Dust the surface of the refrigerated dough with brown rice flour and cut off a 1/2-pound (orange-size) piece. Dust with more rice flour and quickly shape into a ball. You will need to use lots of rice flour to prevent the dough from sticking to your hands or the work surface, but avoid working lumps of flour into the dough.

4. Liberally sprinkle brown rice flour onto a 14-inch square piece of parchment paper. Flatten the dough with your hands into an even circle, sprinkle generously with more rice flour, cover with another 14-inch piece of parchment paper, then roll the dough between the parchment to produce a very thin round (about 1/16- to 1/8-inch). Peel away the top piece of parchment paper, leaving the crust on the bottom piece.

5. Brush away most of the excess brown rice flour from the top of the dough, then spread with a layer of barbecue sauce. Top with onion and pepper mixture, garlic, pulled pork, crumbled bacon and shredded cheese or vegan cheese.

6. Slide the pizza and parchment directly onto the baking stone. Check for doneness in about 12 minutes (parchment paper will turn black, which is fine).

7. Cool just slightly, top with fresh cilantro, slice and serve.

Gluten-Free Pesto and Squash Pizza (can also be Dairy-Free)

Makes one 14-inch pizza

1 large red onion, sliced

1/2 tablespoon olive oil

1/2-pound (orange size portion) Gluten-Free Pizza Dough

Brown rice flour (for dusting)

About 1 cup garlic scape pesto or basil pesto (store-bought or homemade... if you're dairy-free, you'll need to make your own without the cheese) mixed with a little water - you're going for the consistency of a thick sauce

4 large garlic cloves, peeled and minced

1 delicata squash, seeds and fibers removed, thinly sliced

1 to 1 1/2 cups shredded gouda cheese or vegan mozzarella cheese (I use Daiya, but I prefer to go very light)

Fresh sage, minced for garnish

1. In a skillet, sauté the onion in olive oil until softened.

2. Thirty minutes prior to baking, preheat oven to 500°F, with a baking stone placed on the middle rack.

5. Brush away most of the excess brown rice flour from the top of the dough, then spread with a layer of the pesto-water mixture. Top with onion, garlic, sliced squash, and shredded cheese or vegan cheese.

6. Slide the pizza and parchment directly onto the baking stone. Check for doneness in about 12 minutes (parchment paper will turn black, which is fine).

7. Cool just slightly, top with fresh minced sage, slice and serve.

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Jon: No gluten, no dairy, and no sugar. Raise your hand if this would kill you. My hand is up. Geez, I spent years subsisting off nothing but cereal, pasta, sandwiches, quesadillas, and various poisonous fast food items. All of those things have gluten, dairy, or sugar... except for maybe the fast food, which is not really food at all, rather a combination of laboratory-concocted contagions, and therefore may be exempt from having any actual food-related properties.

Despite her crazy dietary restrictions, Hethyr has somehow managed to work pizza into her diet. And quesadillas. And grilled cheese. And ice cream. And chocolate. She eats almost like a non-restricted person... even better, most of the time. The only catch is that she spends about thirty hours a day in the kitchen. But creativity and ingenuity go a long way when it comes to cooking. I think half the edibles in our refrigerator were made out of nuts. The other half grew out of the ground. The other half came from happy animals. (We don't cover fractions until April in first grade, so I'm doing the best I can).

It's been a tough stretch with Terry's death and Hethyr's Lyme disease diagnosis. When things get difficult in life, you've got to find happiness, solace, and healing where you can. Food can supply all three of these things. More specifically, PIZZA can supply all three of these things. Pizza should win a Nobel Prize for awesomeness. Of course it's questionable whether gluten-free pizza can actually be called pizza much of the time. But Hethyr's recipe rocks. Yes, it's true that my liberal "open-minded" palate is easy to please with food. But I assure you, this dough is delicious. All you GFers should give it a try and see for yourselves.

Saturday Nut Fever

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Thu, 05 Jul 2012 23:09:00 +0000

Hethyr: At the risk of sounding like a Debbie Downer, I must admit that for a while I've been feeling rather uninspired in the kitchen until very recently. Though I love to cook, I often don't feel like making the effort when it comes to cooking for Jon and me after long days of cooking for clients. And now with my dietary restrictions, it's not as easy for Jon to just whip something up for both of us... no more quesadillas or grilled cheese sandwiches for this girl. No more calling our favorite pizza place for a pie on a night we don't feel like cooking. And even one of the (VERY FEW) "safe" restaurants in town is no longer safe. I ordered a salad that I've eaten several times before and something must have been cross contaminated with gluten, because I paid for it for a full three weeks. From now on, I will certainly be a bit more hesitant about ordering from their gluten-free and/or vegan menus.

"Make yourself a dang quesa-DILL-a!"

However, I made a discovery maybe a month or two ago that has eased the pain of not being able to have dairy... at least to some extent... okay, I still miss cheese terribly. But, I decided to try my hand at making my own nut milk (even though I've never really liked the store-bought stuff) and let me tell you - this stuff is top notch! It's also super-easy to make and it's the only alternative milk that I've had that is thick and creamy like real milk and doesn't have an overpowering nutty taste. Score! I also adapted a recipe I found all over the Web to come up with a really great soft cheese substitute (think spicy ricotta-esque) that has become my go-to for spreading on gluten-free crackers, but I'd still love to find a substitute for things like mozzarella and cheddar, so I'll still be on the lookout.

Aside from cheese, I also really miss yogurt. I've tried the store-bought almond-based, dairy-free stuff and I think it's disgusting. I've also tried the store-bought coconut-based, dairy-free yogurt and I like it, but it's expensive and not something I'm willing to buy on any kind of regular basis. So where does that leave me? Again, nuts to the rescue! I found countless recipes online for a raw cashew "yogurt" and opted to try it my own way. The results were quite a success. I first tried it in a dill sauce to serve with salmon and, aside from a slightly grainy texture, I was surprised at how great it was. The next day I tried it with homemade gluten-free granola and was again pleasantly surprised by the results. I'm positive that cashews would result in a smoother, creamier texture but cashews also have a stronger nut flavor. So it's up to you what kind of nuts you want to use. I will mix it up depending on my mood.

Nutty goodness: cheese, milk & yogurt

But my favorite discovery so far has been a nut-based Alfredo-style sauce. There are quite a few recipes for this online, but I made my own. While I realize that the nut milk and nut yogurt are not exact substitutes for dairy-based products, I am willing to boldly say that most people would not have a clue that this Faux 'Fredo Sauce isn't the real deal. I have a VERY picky palate and this stuff is awesome. I have used it on pizza and pasta so far, and I have NO complaints whatsoever!

So, although not overwhelmingly inspired in the kitchen lately, I am finding things that make my gluten-free, dairy-free life a little more joyful and I'm still on the lookout. I will definitely share them with you, dear readers, if I feel like they're worth sharing. For now, please enjoy the following FOUR recipes! And, if you're good, maybe next time I'll post a recipe for an amazing gluten-free pizza you can make using the Faux 'Fredo Sauce. :)

Macadamia Nut Milk

Makes about 4 cups

1 cup raw macadamia nuts

Water for soaking

4 cups water

1. Soak macadamia nuts in water overnight in the refrigerator, then drain and rinse.

2. Place macadamia nuts in a good blender with four cups of water and blend well.

3. Place a colander over a large bowl and line with a flour sack cloth and pour in the nut mixture. Once milk has drained through, gather four corners of the cloth and squeeze to release all of the nut milk. Discard nut pulp or reserve for another use.

4. Pour nut milk into a reusable container with an airtight lid. Store in the refrigerator.

* Note: I've stored this for up to a week at a time in the refrigerator, but I don't know how long it will keep after that - it never lasts that long in my house and I usually make a double batch. I go through about 1/2 gallon per week between drinking, cooking and baking.

Spicy Macadamia Nut "Cheese"

Makes about 2 cups

1 1/2 cups raw macadamia nuts

1/4 cup water

2 tablespoons white wine

2 tablespoons lemon juice

1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar

Up to 2 tablespoons of nutritional yeast (optional)
3 large garlic cloves, minced

1/2 teaspoon kosher or sea salt

Pepper, to taste

Sriracha hot sauce, to taste (I use a lot because I like it spicy!)

1. Soak nuts overnight in water, then drain and rinse.

2. Add all ingredients to a good blender and blend until smooth. Taste and adjust seasonings and/or Sriracha.

3. Eat right away or chill in a covered jar in the refrigerator overnight to let flavors develop. Store for up to one week in the refrigerator.

Note: This is a very versatile recipe... instead of Sriracha, try some curry powder, Herbes de Provence or chopped fresh rosemary or oregano to add flavor... or any other herbs and spices you can think of!

Macadamia Nut "Yogurt"

Makes 2 cups

1 cup raw macadamia nuts

1 cup water

1. Place cashews and water in a good blender and blend until the consistency of heavy cream.

2. Pour mixture into a jar and cover with a coffee filter secured with a rubber band. Place in a warm place (like the top of your refrigerator) and allow to sit.

3. You can start checking the yogurt after 6 hours, although mine has taken up to 24 hours. First you'll see small bubbles start to form, then you'll see the "whey" or liquid sink to the bottom and the "curd" or solids floating above that. You can also smell a slightly sour smell. At this point, transfer the yogurt to the refrigerator and chill.

4. When you're ready to eat it, stir together the "whey" and yogurt. You can sweeten it with honey, vanilla, agave nectar, maple syrup, etc., etc., etc. if desired or stir in some granola and fresh fruit.

Faux 'Fredo Sauce

Makes about 3 to 3 1/2 cups

1 cup raw cashews

1 cup raw macadamia nuts

1/2 cup raw pine nuts

1 1/2 cups hot water

1 tablespoon lemon juice

3 large garlic cloves

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon pepper

1. Mix all ingredients together in a good blender and blend until smooth. Use immediately or pour into a jar with a lid and allow to sit in the refrigerator overnight for the flavors to develop. Use it on pasta, dip (gluten-free?) breadsticks in it, use it on pizza (check back next time for a recipe!) or drizzle it over steamed veggies... I have a feeling I'll be finding a LOT of uses for this one!

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Jon: My wife loves nuts. Big nuts, little nuts, round nuts, oblong nuts, smooth nuts, bumpy nuts, dark nuts, light nuts... it doesn't matter what they look like or who they belong to... she simply adores them. The girl just can't get enough nuts.

Of course I'm talking about edible nuts that grow on trees, so if all you perverts can go ahead and get your minds out of the gutter then I will continue with my nut monologue.

Our lazy Susan houses several large, medium and small mason jars full of nuts. We have a two-gallon tupperware bin full of more nuts. Our garage freezer has various bags, jars and sacks full of nuts. In fact, I don't know that I've ever seen so many nut sacks in one house in my entire life. Macadamia nuts, hazelnuts, pine nuts, almonds, cashews, pecans, pistachios, walnuts... it's nutrageous.

Even before Hethyr learned to make all sorts of nut-based concoctions like milk, yogurt and cheese, she purchased and consumed nuts by the pound. On more than one occasion, I can honestly tell you that she bought more than one hundred dollars worth of nuts from Whole Foods. She would load up her grain bags with dozens of scoops from the bulk aisle bins like some mad nutaholic. I've never seen a girl walking around a grocery store with such massive nut sacks in all my life.

I suppose that when you can't consume gluten or dairy, you find solace in the delicious snackability of nuts. But over the last several months, it has been amazing to see how many other products she can make with them and how she can use these in various recipes. She probably takes in a thousand times the recommended daily amount of protein for a person her size. There is no doubt that the recipes are über-healthy as well as tasty.

So next time you go to Whole Foods, if you are startled to see a tiny girl with enormous nut sacks, be sure and thank her for all the delicious recipes.

Goodbye, Waldo...

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Wed, 27 Jun 2012 03:19:00 +0000

Waldo Canyon Trail has always been our favorite "in-town" hike and now it's gone along with thousands of acres of forest and homes/buildings on the west-side of town. We had planned on doing a regular blog post this week, but in light (definitely no pun intended) of what's going on, we didn't feel that it was appropriate. Our dear city is burning and all we can do is watch and be prepared in case we have to evacuate (we don't think we will, but neither did a lot of the folks on the west-side). Our hearts are breaking and our thoughts are with all of the amazing firefighters, volunteers and evacuees.

Facebook picture from Sa Bine to KKTV 11 News... heart-wrenching.

Time to Try Your Hand at Home-Brewed Kombucha?... Kom-Betcha!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Tue, 22 May 2012 01:33:00 +0000

Hethyr:

I have a slight obsession.

One of the kitchen cabinets

A few of the pantry shelves

One that Jon has teased me about for years.

The top shelf of the kitchen refrigerator

The bottom shelf of the kitchen refrigerator

But now he's finding out just how awesome this obsession is.

One shelf of the garage refrigerator

The door of the garage refrigerator

"Hi, I'm Hethyr and I'm a JAR-oholic."

The lazy Susan

A living room table

I also love bottles.

The kitchen ledge

The bathroom medicine cabinet

And now that I'm brewing a gallon of kombucha about once every 10 days or so, a lot of those jars and bottles are getting used... not that they weren't being used before I started brewing! I've got a feeling Jon will have plenty to say about the jars, so I'll fill you in on why you might want to brew your own kombucha and how to go about it if you choose to do so (which you should!).

Batch No. 2 of home-brewed kombucha

First, what the hell is kombucha? Unless you shop at a natural grocer, you may have never even heard of this stuff. It's a fermented tea that's been around for centuries and is known for it's health-boosting benefits. Per KombuchaKamp.com, it's not a cure-all, but it helps to "bring the body back into balance so that it may heal itself naturally." I was introduced to it about five years ago when my dad first found out he had cancer. He was in the process of changing his diet and took me to a little raw food restaurant down the street from his house for lunch. He pointed out a bottle of GT's Kombucha and told me I should try it. I loved it and have been hooked ever since.

Though I love the stuff and the idea of the health benefits, buying it by the bottle at Whole Foods (or another health food store) is way too expensive to do on a regular basis... at least on our meager income! ;) So I've been chatting with my sister-in-law about it for the last year or two. She brews her own and has told me how easy it is, but I sort-of didn't believe her for some weird reason. I had all of the necessary equipment the entire time and was just too nervous to try it, but my fear was entirely unfounded. It's so incredibly easy to make this stuff!
If you need a kombucha starter - also referred to as a SCOBY (Symbiotic Colony of Bacteria and Yeast) - here's an excellent video on how to grow one...

Or you can order a starter from here... http://www.culturesforhealth.com/starter-cultures/kombucha.html. I haven't tried it this way, but I've ordered yogurt cultures from this site and I recommend them. They also have a ton of useful info, videos and recipes.

Once you've got your SCOBY(s)...

That white layer is the SCOBY

...here's what you'll need to brew one quart (you can adjust accordingly if you want to brew more at once):

2 1/2 cups distilled water
1/4 cup organic sugar
2 black or green tea bags
1/2 cup starter batch of kombucha - use some of the batch from growing your SCOBY or some store-bought unflavored kombucha
SCOBY
Clean and sterilized glass jar(s)

Here's what to do:

1. Bring water to a boil, remove from heat and stir in the sugar until dissolved. Add tea bags and steep for 15 minutes and then let cool or, if you prefer, you can leave the bags in until the tea has cooled completely.

2. Once the tea has cooled, remove tea bags if you haven't already and pour the tea into the jar(s). Add the starter kombucha and your SCOBY, cover the jar(s) with a tightly woven cloth, paper towel or coffee filter and secure with a lid band or rubber band (it needs to breathe, so don't use an airtight lid).

3. Place in a warm, dark place for about a week. At that point, taste the kombucha and, if it tastes ready, remove the mother SCOBY and the newly formed baby SCOBY with clean hands and transfer the kombucha to bottles (straining through a fine plastic mesh strainer if desired) or just put a lid on the jar in which you brewed. You can now use both SCOBYs to culture new batches of kombucha. If they've fused, you can tear them apart.

NOTES:

- You can flavor kombucha using fresh, frozen or dried fruit, fruit juice, herbs, etc. I used ginger in my last batch.

- You may notice a brown stringy substance in the jar. This is the yeast culturing the tea and is a completely normal byproduct of the fermentation process.

That brown blob is yeast. Wonder who
first decided this stuff was okay to drink?

- The SCOBY may float horizontally or vertically or may sink and it's fine.

- For more information, I would suggest trolling around the Cultures for Health website and, in particular, their kombucha section. There are FAQs, recipes, videos, troubleshooting, etc.

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Jon: "Obsession: An almost insane desire, longing, or burning lust for someone or something. You feel like without that thing or person, you are not complete and can't cope, or - in extreme circumstances - live, unless you have the object you desire."

I remember when Hethyr's obsession used to be me. Now it is jars. I simply can't compete with functional storage canisters and screw-top lids. Sigh.

It all started out harmlessly enough. A few years ago, Hethyr started using jars for homemade holiday gifts. Over time, the jars worked their way into our fridge and cabinets. I would get reprimanded for pitching empty jars from the store into the recycle bin instead of cleaning them, removing the labels, and adding them to our collection. Hethyr progressively made more frequent trips to Ace Hardware to buy various-sized jars in bulk. Then came the day that she spent her birthday gift certificate to Uncommon Goods on five fancy multi-colored jars because she couldn't stand that such things could exist in this world without her. I think that was when I finally accepted that Hethyr had found the new love of her life.

Handsome Lars and his fabulous jars

Now we live in the heart of Jarville, and clearly there is no escape. There are jars in the kitchen, the closets, the bathrooms, the bedroom, the garage... where it will all end? Is there any small object in our home which won't eventually end up in a jar? You've seen the pictures. You tell me.

I personally suspect that the kombucha, like many other things Hethyr makes, is just an excuse to use a glass container. Regardless, the kombucha is definitely top-quality, and as a bonus it is awesomely disgusting to watch ferment. It looks like some sort of mysterious alien lifeform. However, now that it has finished fermenting and has migrated into the fridge, I have absolutely no idea what it looks like... because I can't find it. It has entered the Jarmuda Triangle. There must be thirty jars in that fridge, most of which contain something confusing and unexplainable. It's hard enough for me just to locate my milk. I'll take Hethyr's word for it that the kombucha is in there somewhere.

Hethyr in 5 years

Heart Attack on a Plate - Literally.

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Thu, 03 May 2012 02:41:00 +0000

Hethyr: As we were sitting here winding down last night, Jon was reading me an article about the latest person to keel over (although she didn't die) at the Heart Attack Grill in Las Vegas. Apparently this woman - believed to be in her 40s - was eating a "double bypass" burger, smoking cigarettes and drinking margaritas before she dropped to the floor unconscious. As I was shaking my head, he continued to read about how any diner who exceeds 350 pounds eats for free and about how the "quadruple bypass" burger has four half-pound patties and eight slices of American cheese. Oh, and you can add TWENTY - yep, TWENTY - slices of bacon (five per patty), dripping in grease, for a few extra dollars. It's been said that it has around 8,000 calories. I have no idea if that's with the bacon or not. You can also order "flatliner fries" (which are fried in pure lard) and a "butterfat shake" (made with pure cream) to go with your "quadruple bypass" burger. And of course the menu includes cigarettes and alcohol!

Quadruple Bypass Burger and Flatliner Fries

I am beyond infuriated that a place like this is legally allowed to open and operate, but that our own government conducts federal raids on raw milk dairies!!! What the hell is wrong with this picture??? We, as a society, are okay with places like the Heart Attack Grill and Carl's Jr., but we are leery of drinking milk that hasn't been pasteurized to ungodly temperatures, killing off anything good that might actually benefit our bodies? On one hand, I believe there should be a massive crackdown on fast food establishments that are blatantly TRYING to kill people, but on the other hand, I guess it is survival of the fittest in a way. It makes me truly sad that people are either so uneducated or just don't give a damn that they willingly eat this kind of "food" and actually find places like the Heart Attack Grill funny... especially when there are those of us trying to educate and spread the word about the dangers of fast "food" and the benefits of REAL FOOD.

In the spirit of HEALTH, I'd like to share a recipe for some vegan burgers that I'll be making for my yoga teacher graduation potluck this coming weekend. I found the original recipe here, adapted it to make it vegan and added an awesome sauce (which I adapted a bit from here) since I'm not always a burger-bun fan (especially when it's gluten-free) and since I currently can't have cheese. And since I'm so pissed about the Heart Attack Grill, I'm going to throw in an extra recipe for a fruit salad that I'm thinking of taking to the potluck, too. Wow. You guys actually benefit from me being angry for once. ;) Enjoy not keeling over and dying while you're eating this yummy meal!

Vegan Gluten-Free Quinoa Veggie Burger with Spicy Sauce

Serves 4

Sauce:

1 garlic clove

1/4 teaspoon salt

1 cup vegan yogurt (if you're not vegan, feel free to use regular yogurt)

1 tablespoon lime juice

2 teaspoons Sriracha (or other hot sauce)

Salt and pepper, to taste

Burgers:

1/2 cup uncooked quinoa

1 tablespoon ground flaxseed meal

3 tablespoons hot water

1 carrot, shredded

4 scallions, sliced

2 garlic cloves

1 1/2 cups cooked black beans (you can also use 1-15 oz. can, drained and rinsed)

1/4 cup vegan, gluten-free breadcrumbs (if you're not vegan or gluten-free, feel free to use regular breadcrumbs)

1 tablespoon ground cumin

1 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon pepper

2 tablespoons olive oil

1. For the sauce: Make a paste out of the garlic and salt by smashing with the edge of a chef's knife. Whisk together garlic paste, vegan yogurt, lime juice and Sriracha. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Refrigerate until burgers are finished.

2. In a small pot, bring 3/4 cup of water to a boil (I have to use a bit more at high altitude). Add quinoa, cover, reduce heat to low and cook until all of the water is absorbed, about 15 minutes.

3. In a small bowl, mix together ground flaxseed and hot water and let sit for about 10 minutes.

4. Add all ingredients except olive oil to a food processor and pulse until combined but still a little chunky.

5. Form mixture into 4 patties.

6. Heat oil over medium heat in a large skillet. Cook burgers until well-browned, about 5-8 minutes per side. Serve with Spicy Sauce.

Fruit Salad with Agave-Citrus Dressing and Mint

Serves 4

1 1/2 tablespoons lime juice
1 1/2 tablespoons mandarin orange juice
3 tablespoons agave nectar (you can substitute honey if you'd like)
1 teaspoon lime zest
2 tablespoons fresh mint leaves, chopped
4 cups assorted fruit, cut into bite-size pieces... pineapple, mandarin orange slices
(reserve juice), kiwi, apple, strawberry, grapes, banana, etc.

1. In a small bowl or glass measuring cup, whisk together lime juice, orange juice, agave nectar, lime zest and mint.

2. Place fruit in a large bowl and drizzle with the dressing; toss to combine.

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Jon: Few things can outshine the buffet at a party full of yogis. A mouthwatering smorgasbord of fresh fruits and veggies, whole grain casseroles, bean dips, vegan soups, and all sorts of wonderful crap I couldn't identify. It was delicious. And it was nice to eat freely without worrying about how my food might kill me. Hethyr's quinoa burgers were an awesome part of the feast. And the timing was apropos, as we just read about mad cow disease rearing its ugly head in California. Sounds like a good time to eat a veggie burger.

I imagine that very few people are left reading this due to the vomit that spewed out all over their keyboards upon seeing the picture of the 8,000-calorie quadruple bypass burger. If you are one of the lucky few who made it this far in the post without destroying your laptop, congratulations. Otherwise... sorry.

I can definitely remember a time in my life when I would have thought such a huge burger was hilarious. But now it is clearly evident to me how everyone's life is negatively impacted by a burger like this: the person who eats it takes one step closer to death's door; the restaurant proprietors rack up loads of bad karma due to manslaughter; more doped-up mistreated cows are slaughtered in inhumane ways at large-scale commercial feed operations; and every American deals with higher health care costs as one more self-deprecating glutton racks up huge medical expenses because of their own senseless choices. The only good that comes out of it is that some people will change their eating habits based upon the fear of disease and death.

Turning away from the topics of vomit and death and steering toward a more positive note, you now have a couple more healthy recipes compliments of Chef Yogi Hethyr that will help you live well. And in case you haven't heard, my newly licensed yoga instructor wife just officially taught her first class at Pranava Yoga Center. Woohoo!

Chef Yogi Hethyr
Picture by Tom Martin

Keep Your Coffee Upside-Down!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 01:39:00 +0000

Hethyr: “The best part of waking up is Folgers in my butt!” That’s my dad’s new theme song. For those of you who remember our post Terry Become a Gerson Person, my dad is now two months into a two-year stint on the Gerson Therapy.

Here’s an excerpt from their website…
“The Gerson Therapy is a safe, natural treatment developed by Dr. Max Gerson in the 1920s. The Therapy activates the body’s extraordinary ability to heal itself through an organic, vegetarian diet, raw juices, coffee enemas and natural supplements. The Gerson Therapy treats the underlying causes of disease: toxicity and nutritional deficiency.”

When I was home in December, Dad was sleeping/resting about 16-20 hours per day, he would wheeze any time he exerted any energy at all and his ankle was swollen to twice its normal size from the blood clots associated with the cancer. I honestly didn’t know if I would have the chance to see him again. Needless to say, it was the hardest goodbye I’ve ever had to say to him when I had to leave to come back to Colorado. However, NOW he is like a totally different person! He is off all medication except a couple of baby Aspirin per day, he is up around 8am, busy during the day and hits the hay around 10pm. While I was home a few weeks ago, I didn’t hear him wheeze once and his ankle is back to its normal size. He worked on projects around the house, ate with gusto and had an ornery twinkle back in his eyes. It was amazing! This time when he dropped me off at the airport, I gave him a great big hug and said with absolute faith, “See you again in a few months!” I can’t begin to tell you what an incredible feeling that was.

Dad and me, March 2012

And it’s all thanks to a healthy, organic, vegetarian diet, frequent – VERY frequent – raw juices, coffee enemas and natural supplements. You may be asking yourself, “WHY coffee enemas?” I did the same, but the Gerson website explains it well. “The coffee enemas are a must for anyone doing the Gerson Therapy. As the juices begin rebuilding the body and encouraging toxins to be released from the cells into the bloodstream, a great deal of stress is placed upon the liver. The liver alone, especially in cancer patients, cannot deal with a sudden influx of toxins into the bloodstream. The coffee enemas increase liver filtering, greatly aiding the liver’s ability to remove serum toxins.” So, to make the best of an new and awkward situation, Dad has adopted an awesome sense of humor about the whole thing. Hence the quote that started this post and the post title itself. He’s a funny man. =)

Dad making his carrot-apple juice

One thing which pleasantly surprised me – and, NO, this doesn’t have to do with coffee enemas – was the variety and tastiness of the food. It is a very restrictive diet, but through cookbooks and my mom’s creativity, my parents eat pretty damn well, if I do say so myself. One night, my mom, my sister Fayre, my Aunt Vickie and I made dinner for the family and it took us at least 2 hours from start to finish. I really commend my parents on their commitment to wellness! I’d love to share a couple of my favorite recipes with you. I hope you enjoy them as much as we all did!

Vegan Stuffed Peppers with Tomato Sauce

Serves 6

Vegan Stuffed Peppers, Twice Baked Sweet & White Potatoes, Salad

Sauce:

3 large organic tomatoes

½ head organic garlic, peeled

1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar

¼ teaspoon dried dill

6 medium to large organic sweet peppers (any color), tops cut off, seeds and ribs removed

Filling:

¼ cup apple cider vinegar

1 large organic onion, diced large

3 medium organic celery stalks, sliced ¼-inch

3 medium organic carrots, diced ¼-inch

3-4 cups cooked organic brown rice

1. Cut an X into the bottom of each tomato's skin. Blanch tomatoes by bringing a large pot of water to a boil, then dunking tomatoes in the boiling water for about 30 seconds. Remove tomatoes with a slotted spoon and dunk into a bowl of cold water. You should then be able to remove the skins easily.

2. Dice the tomatoes and add to a pot with the peeled garlic, 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar and dried dill. Bring to a boil and cook until tender. Either blend with an immersion blender right in the pot or cool slightly, then blend in a blender or food processor in batches. Set sauce aside.

3. Preheat oven to 350°F. On the stovetop, bring a large pot of water to a boil. Cook peppers in boiling water for 3 minutes, remove with a slotted spoon and dunk in ice-cold water to stop cooking. Remove from cold water and set aside.

4. Using the same pot (minus the water), heat apple cider vinegar over medium heat. Add chopped onion, celery and carrots and cook, covered, stirring occasionally, until vegetables are softened, about 10-15 minutes.

5. Mix vegetables with cooked rice, then stuff peppers with the mixture.

6. Spread about 1/2 cup of the sauce on the bottom of a 9 x 13-inch baking dish, place the peppers on top, then pour the remaining sauce over the top of the peppers. Bake at 350℉ for 30 minutes.

Twice-Baked Sweet 'n' White Potatoes

Serves 6

1 organic sweet potato

2 organic russet potatoes

Organic soup stock or water

1/4 teaspoon coriander

2 tablespoons organic chives, chopped

1. Pierce potatoes a couple of times and place in a slow cooker with a small amount of water. Cover and cook on high for 3-4 hours, or until potatoes are tender.

2. Preheat oven to 350℉. Cool potatoes to the touch, then slice in half lengthwise. Gently scoop out the pulp, leaving the skins intact. Mash pulp with a little soup stock or water and coriander.

3. Spoon the mashed potatoes back into the skins and place in a baking dish. Top with chives and bake for 20-30 minutes.

Apricot Sauce

Garlic Taters & Broccoli with Apricot Sauce

Makes about 6 servings

3/4 cup dried apricots (unsulphured)

3 cups hot water

1 1/2 cups orange or apple juice

1. Chop the apricots and soak in the water for several hours.

2. Place softened apricots and remaining liquid in a pot and add juice. Cook over low heat for 1-1 1/2 hours. Let cool slightly, then purée with an immersion blender or transfer to a blender and blend.

Note: This is awesome over lightly steamed broccoli!

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Jon: With all that we've learned about the incredible health benefits of juicing, naturally we had to try it for ourselves. I had always had a skeptical view of juicing, mostly because everything that I knew about it came from infomercials; and nothing can destroy your impression of a product like watching hyper-animated salesmen plugging the greatest invention of all time with crazed audience members shouting and waving money in the air.

So we decided to start juicing before we even bought a juicer. The standard procedure was for me to puree some apples and carrots in the blender and strain the mush through some flour cloth. It took about ten minutes of squeezing, twisting, and cussing to filter the juice through the cloth into a couple of drinkable shots. It sucked. It was probably the worst part of my day. Thank you Mr. Jack LaLanne... you have brought me great relief.

So nowadays we flood our system with multiple juices per day. We buy organic apples and carrots by the crate. It's hard to recognize any positive effects of such an activity when you already feel healthy, but after learning about the amazing benefits of Gerson Therapy and seeing it for ourselves through Terry's experiences, it is easy to imagine that we are doing tremendous good for our bodies. Although one thing I haven't yet tried is putting coffee up my butt. Maybe I'll save that one for later. For now I'll continue the traditional method of inserting my caffeine from the top.

Divine Bovine

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Tue, 13 Mar 2012 01:26:00 +0000

Hethyr: Rules were meant to be broken, right? Well, I had to break a couple of rules a few weeks ago when an incredible chef friend of mine emailed and asked if Jon and I wanted to attend one of his super-secret (not really – I just wanted to make myself feel important for a second) pop-up dinners at Ranch Foods Direct. Having talked to Jon about just that a few days earlier, we jumped at the opportunity. I knew damn well that he’d be serving food that I am not technically supposed to have but I also knew that this was not going to be a run-of-the-mill restaurant experience, so I decided to throw caution to the wind and dive in face-first.

If you’ve never heard of a pop-up restaurant, it’s a fairly new concept where a chef finds a business willing to rent its commercial kitchen space for a night or a weekend or whatever is deemed appropriate. On said night or weekend, the chef arrives and prepares dinner for guests who have reserved places ahead of time. The chef determines the menu so his or her true talent is really allowed to shine. Kevin is a huge advocate of local, seasonal, sustainably raised food and he’s a die-hard Ranch Foods customer, so we knew we’d be in safe hands.

Without further ado, I present to you our amazing farm-to-table Butcher's Dinner from Chef Kevin with Full Circle Cuisine. You can find a list of dates and menus on his website – don’t miss out on this incredible experience if you’re in the area!

The fantastic menu

Chef Kevin welcomed us with a glass of Two Rivers
Syrah (Grand Junction, CO)

Even with a crowd of people gathered around him watching, Kevin was as
cool as a cucumber.

First course: Short rib pastrami on rye (oops - gluten!) with onion,
cornichon and foie gras mustard. Delicious!

Second course: Crispy bone marrow (oops - gluten again!) with frisée,
capers, black radish salad and black truffle vinaigrette

The chef in action with a smile on his face. =)

Mushroom-herb salad...

...which was served with our main course of hanger steak with soft farm egg.
I *loved* the steak and egg combo!

Yep, that's chocolate cake (more gluten) filled with chocolate mousse.
And that's candied bacon next to it.

Plating dessert

Dessert: Candied bacon chocolate terrine
aka
pure bliss!

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Jon: The first time I had a meal prepared by Kevin was about a year ago on a sidewalk in Old Colorado City. It was a Cuban sandwich and it was ridiculously delicious. I knew right then that the dude could cook. His solid reputation has continued to grow within the local foodie community, so I had nothing but the highest expectations when I arrived at Ranch Foods for his pop-up meal.

I wanted great food and that's exactly what I got. Ever had bone marrow before? I sure hadn't... and I'll admit that the words don't exactly have a mouth-watering ring to them. But it was fried and tasty, and the salad with black truffle vinaigrette on the side was a great compliment. And I don't know three words that I would rather see put side by side on a menu more than steak, egg, and mushroom. Oh yeah, except for maybe chocolate and bacon. It was a worthy conclusion to a gratifying feast.

Wookin' Pa Nub in All Da Wong Paces

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 15:57:00 +0000

“I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.” ~Unknown

Hethyr: I’ve always been a bit of a tomboy and not much of a romantic (I think Jon appreciates this because he isn’t the most romantic of men – sorry, babe!), but I do have my moments - and so does he. We, as a couple, aren’t big on Hallmark holidays and usually don’t go out of our way to celebrate them and Valentine’s Day this year was no exception. However, I often do little things to show Jon that I love him and even though we didn’t have any plans for V-Day, I decided spur-of-the-moment to make a special dessert for him.

I had been to Whole Foods that day and picked up one of the coupon flyers and inside was a recipe for Sweet Strawberry Risotto. I am probably going to be crucified by my Italian family for saying this, but I’m usually not a big fan of risotto. I will eat it, but there is something about it that really just doesn’t do it for me… maybe it’s the texture. But, I’ve never tried a sweet risotto and in my mind, this seemed like more of a rice pudding (which I love) so I decided to make my own version.

But before giving you the recipe, in the spirit of LOVE (pronounced in my best Barry White voice), we’re going to do a countdown of our top ten "romantic" dinner dates…

10) Puerto Vallarta, Mexico - Langostino’s… OMG, this is one of the funniest “romantic” dinner memories. After a recommendation, Jon and I went to this place on the beach in Puerto Vallarta only to discover terrible food and even worse music. My shrimp wasn’t deveined - which totally grossed us out - and the terrible musician played every shitty cliché bar song you can imagine. At one point I said to Jon, “If the next song is ‘Sweet Home Alabama,’ I’m going to go up there and smash his guitar!” Well, guess what? Yep. The next song was “Sweet Home Alabama.” Jon was so caught up in the moment that he actually stood up and pointed at the guy while laughing hysterically. I had to remind him that the guy could see him. When we requested our check a few short minutes later, it was obvious that they were very glad we were leaving. Oops.

9) Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica – La Perla Negra… We’ve already relayed this story in a previous blog post, so I’ll spare you the details and just put a link back to the previous post.

8) Colorado Springs, Colorado - Beau Jo’s… Our first night living in Colorado, we were faced with the decision of where to eat. Being young and inexperienced in the kitchen, I was not about to cook our first meal in a new town in our apartment – too much to explore! So we decided on a little pizza joint not far from our new place where we discovered Mountain Pies and Tommyknocker Maple Nut Brown Ale. Unfortunately, Beau Jo’s no longer exists in Colorado Springs but we try to hit up the one in Idaho Springs anytime we’re in the area. Also unfortunately, I think Tommyknocker has changed their Maple Nut Brown Ale recipe, too. It doesn’t seem to be quite as tasty these days. But the memories from our first night in Colorado will always be sweet.

7) New Orleans, Louisiana - Brigtsen’s… On the first of only two nights we spent in NOLA, we took our friend’s recommendation and ate at this award winning restaurant nestled into an old house. We were so glad we did! Although nearly half-an-hour late for our reservation due to our ignorance in using the Street Cars, we were greeted cheerfully. Our server had worked there for quite some time and was very knowledgeable about the menu and even gave us a tour of the tiny kitchen when she found out I was a chef. I was impressed by what comes out of that kitchen purely based on the lack of space and number of people crammed in. The food was spectacular! And we’re sure we saw Justin Long (of Dodgeball fame) on the Street Car on the way back to the apartment but he turned away and slapped on a hat when Jon tried to take a picture inconspicuously with his phone. =)

My dinner - Flounder Meunière with Shrimp Garnish
(Everything here was garnished with shrimp!)

Jon's dinner - Brigtsen's Seafood Platter, also garnished
with shrimp. Wow.

I think I was looking at the dessert menu in this picture.

6) Santa Fe, New Mexico - La Cantina at La Casa Sena... We were completely unprepared for the show we received at this upscale restaurant in Santa Fe. We were told that the La Cantina side of the restaurant was the more laid back, casual side and that the staff would get silly and sing and perform occasionally. We interpreted this to mean that the staff would probably get goofy. Ha! Oh, no. Instead we got Show Tunes. Seriously. Jon and I are way too juvenile to act like adults in this situation… maybe if we had been prepared for it, but instead we were like two little kids who can’t stop laughing in church. At least we weren’t quite as rude as we were at Langostino’s and tried to hide our snickers behind our glasses of wine and napkins. To be fair, the staff was actually quite talented – Jon and I just aren’t mature enough to have taken the situation seriously.

That's our waiter on the left singing his little heart out.

Awwwww!

5) Manitou Springs, Colorado – The Mona Lisa Fondue Restaurant… This is where we decided to celebrate our 10^th anniversary but due to parent-teacher conferences, we planned for the following night. Incredibly, game 7 of the World Series between the Texas Rangers and the St. Louis Cardinals was rescheduled for the same night after a rainout on our actual anniversary. Not having foreseen this, our dinner reservations overlapped with part of the game – not okay since we’ve both been die-hard Cards fans since we were knee-high to a pig’s eye (can you tell we grew up in Illinois?)! So, we once again felt like a couple of kids as we tried to hide the fact that we were tuned into the game on Jon’s phone during our “romantic” fondue dinner. Immediately after we finished eating, we headed for home so we could finish watching the Cards win the Series!

Dinner at the Mona Lisa... yep, that's Jon's phone near his
left elbow.

Watching the Cards win the Series after dinner.

4) Burlington, Vermont - Penny Cluse Café… For our second anniversary, Jon surprised me with a pilgrimage to our own personal Mecca, Burlington, Vermont – the birthplace of Phish. Anyone who has known us for any amount of time, knows that many of our years together have been spent frequenting shows. He decided to book a Bed & Breakfast and after figuring out that we felt as if we were trying to sneak in and out of our parents’ houses each time we came or left, we spent most of our time wandering around town trying to find things to do. At one point we came across the Penny Cluse Café and fell in love. Best biscuits and gravy. Ever. They make a green herb-cream gravy out of this world. And I remember loving the art on the walls – I think it was all from local artists. We really love Burlington and have been back once and made sure to stop at Penny Cluse, but I’ve had the itch to get back there again lately. Maybe I should start dropping some hints…

3) St. Lucia –Sandals… A long, long time ago when Jon and I were on our honeymoon, there were only two Sandals resorts on St. Lucia and the larger of the two had a Japanese restaurant where we went with another couple we met at the Sandals Halcyon. One of my favorite pictures of the two of us is from that excursion. This was a really fun dinner. The chef had some of the people at our table flipping shrimp into the air in the direction of other people. It was quite hilarious. I think after our long shuttle ride back to our resort and a few too many drinks, we grabbed some grub at the all-night grill outside of our room for dessert.

2) Taos, New Mexico – Taos Inn… On our fifth anniversary, we decided to have dinner and catch a bluegrass show at the Taos Inn. Little did we know that the Santa Fe All Stars included some very big names in the bluegrass world – we felt so lucky to have fallen upon this show. Well, that wasn’t all that was great about this place and this night. After seeing some of the show, we popped into the next room to watch the Cardinals finish winning game 5 of the World Series against the Detroit Tigers. See a pattern emerging here? The Cardinals like to win the World Series every 5 years on our anniversary (or at least on the night we celebrate our anniversary). Awesome.

The Santa Fe All Stars at the Taos Inn, Oct. 27, 2006

And our all-time number one “romantic” dinner date… *drum roll, please!*

1) Puerto Vallarta, Mexico – La Palapa… Located next door to our condo, we stopped here the first time we ventured out to see if we could make reservations for the following evening. When told that there was a private event, we planned for two nights later. The next morning as we left our digs, there were military police with machine guns stationed all around – it was rather unnerving! That night when we got home, Jon crashed and I went to sit on the patio. In no time, I realized that there was quite the spectacle taking place next door. Just off the beach, there was a platform installed in the shallow water where performers were entertaining an unseen audience (at least from my perspective). I can’t remember with 100% accuracy, but I think the first act I caught may have been a fire dancer or something like that. Next came a contortionist and then fireworks. And I got to see it all for free because we just happened to have a beachfront condo right next door – lucky me! The next evening as we were waiting for our table, one of the staff told us that there had been some sort of political convention the prior day, hence all of the MPs stationed around the block. Anyway, once our table was ready, we were led out a woven seagrass path lined with candles to a beautiful table on the water decorated with white linens, candles and flowers. Apparently, you get the ROYAL treatment for your anniversary! Dinner was amazing, the sunset was incredible, Jon thoroughly enjoyed the show that came along with his Mexican coffee and, although a bit misspelled, it was so thoughtful of the staff to create a special dessert for us after our other dessert. =)

And now for the recipe I promised you at the beginning of this long-winded post...

Coconut-Blood Orange Risotto with Strawberries

Serves 2 (with leftovers)

2 cups coconut milk, divided use
1 ½ cups water
¼ cup sugar
1 teaspoons vanilla extract
1/2 tablespoon coconut oil
1/2 cup Arborio rice
Zest and juice of 1 medium blood orange
½ cup frozen strawberries, thawed
Toasted coconut, for garnish
Shaved dark chocolate, for garnish

1. Heat 1 ½ cups coconut milk (reserve the remaining 1 cup for later use), water, sugar and vanilla in a small saucepan over medium heat to simmer. Reduce heat to low and keep warm.

2. Heat coconut oil in a medium saucepan over medium heat. Add rice and cook, stirring often, until fragrant and toasted, about 2-3 minutes. Add orange juice and zest and cook, stirring constantly until absorbed, about 2 more minutes.

3. Add about 1/2 cup of the coconut milk mixture and simmer, stirring often, until almost all of the liquid is absorbed, about 3-5 minutes. Add another 1/2 cup of the coconut milk mixture and repeat. Continue in this manner until all of the warm coconut milk has been incorporated and the rice is thick and creamy, about 30 minutes.

4. Remove the saucepan from heat, stir in the reserved cup of coconut milk and set aside for 5 minutes.

5. Spoon half of the strawberries with juice into two dishes, top with risotto, remaining strawberries, toasted coconut and shaved dark chocolate (see picture at the top of the post for finished product).

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Jon: Ahhh, what a nice trip down memory lane. For a non-romantic, I've done a pretty good job of hooking up kick-ass dinners at amazing places all over this continent, if I do say so myself. For me, however, the most memorable dinner dates in the course of our nearly 15 years together (15... wow, time flies when you're havin' fun!) are ones that are a bit more "pedestrian." Hence the inclusion of number 8 in the list above; I insisted on the addition of our "romantic" first-night-in-Colorado-pizza-and-beer-dinner. Sometimes the ones that I remember forever are the most seemingly inconsequential at the time...

· Frisco melts, curly fries and vanilla cokes at Steak 'n Shake in Champaign, Illinois

· Bangers and mashers at Nine Fine Irishmen in Las Vegas

· Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and Sammy Smith's Oatmeal Stouts on the summit of Long's Peak

· Frittatas at the Good Egg in Scottsdale

· Scallops in the basement of Durgin's in Boston

· Beef stew in the sandy forest at Great Sand Dunes National Park

· Fresh gallo pinto and natilla in the Rancho at Casa Mariposa in Nuevo Arenal

· Fat burgers at the Harley Davidson Cafe in New York

The picture doesn't even do this thing justice.

· Cheese quesadillas at a Phish festival in Maine

· Filet mignon and chocolate fondue in our living room

And the best of the best...

· Greasy breakfast at the Sunrise Cafe in Springfield, Illinois

And by the way, in case you are a gambler and you might need to pay back your bookie before he breaks your kneecaps, I can officially guarantee that the Cardinals will win the World Series in 2016. They did it on our fifth anniversary, they did it on our tenth, so naturally they will do it on our fifteenth. My goal is for Hethyr and I to actually be in the stands when it happens instead of watching it over an expensive, fancy meal. It will be hot dogs, Budweiser, and baseball... I'll even break out the champagne and pour it on Hethyr's head when the game ends. Who says I'm not a romantic?

Terry Becomes a Gerson Person!

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 14:42:00 +0000

Hethyr: (1/25/12) Hello, wonderful readers! Wow, has it been a whirlwind couple of weeks for my family and me! I know some of you personally and you may be sick of hearing from me after the past week-and-a-half, but I’ve just got to share the amazing story of what has transpired over the past ten or so days with all of our readers. This is bound to be a pretty long post, so grab a cup of tea and a snack and settle in for an inspiring read.

My mom and dad in front of Arenal Volcano in Costa Rica,
October 2007

As you may or may not know, my dad has been battling cancer on and off for the past four-and-a-half years. He was diagnosed in October, 2007 with Adenocarcenoma (lung cancer) and immediately began intensive rounds of chemotherapy and radiation. After a couple of months, he was hospitalized with a double infection in the port that was installed in his chest in order to make administering the chemo a little easier. He survived that scary episode, but the radiation left him with so much scarring that he now loses his breath very easily and wheezes a lot. During the first rounds of treatment, he also decided to adopt a nearly vegan lifestyle and to take a ton of supplements to see if a natural approach could be the answer. Although, we’re not sure what it was that helped at the time, he was in remission for the next three years.

The Helton family, September 2011

In 2010, we found out that the cancer has returned. We were also rudely awakened to the fact that with this specific type of cancer comes blood clots. Yikes. After a year of being on several different types of blood thinners, the clots kept occurring. Shortly before Thanksgiving, Dad ended up with fluid on his lung. An aspiration resulted in a liter-and-a-half of fluid being removed… amazing the man could actually breathe at all! A day later he wound up with a pulmonary embolism (blood clot in his lung)… and survived. On a day shortly after that, he woke my mom up at 6am saying he needed to go to the hospital. Doctors and nurses were amazed that Dad was still alive when they found multiple pulmonary embolisms. A filter was then installed in an effort to keep any further clots from reaching the lungs or heart, but then a very large clot appeared in the abdomen and threatened to block the entire filter. A catheter was installed and a medicine designed to break up the clot was injected. At the time, it was also determined that Dad was nearly completely clotted from knee to abdomen. After a night in ICU (since there was a chance of internal bleeding), more investigation was done and it was determined that there were blockages in two places, which were leading to the extensive clotting, so balloon procedures were completed and stents were inserted to help the blood start flowing again. Also over the past year, the cancer has spread to his spine. He completed a round of chemo in December, which made him feel like crap and he also ended up with a cold over the past few weeks. The poor guy is sleeping about 18-20 hours a day.

That brings you up-to-date on Dad’s health issues.

So, why am I so excited? Well…

As he has been facing these terrible problems, my dad and family have been doing extensive research on alternative treatment options and in our searches, we found the Gerson Institute and Cancer Curing Society. What a miracle. Per the Gerson website…

"The Gerson Institute is a non-profit organization... dedicated to providing education and training in the Gerson Therapy, an alternative, non-toxic treatment for cancer and other chronic degenerative diseases. The Gerson Therapy is a safe, natural treatment developed by Dr. Max Gerson in the 1920s. The therapy activates the body's extraordinary ability to heal itself through an organic, vegetarian diet, raw juices, coffee enemas and natural supplements. The Gerson Therapy treats the underlying causes of disease: toxicity and nutritional deficiency. "

We’ve read countless testimonials and talked to several people who have either been to the Gerson Institute or have a relative or close friend who has completed the Gerson Therapy. The cool thing is, each story we hear is a positive one of peace and healing. People are not just in remission – they are actually cured through this amazing, natural approach!

The downside? It’s REALLY expensive and insurance doesn’t cover a dime. BUT… my family and some of our close friends decided to take matters into our own hands and attempt to raise this money ourselves!

On Sunday, January 15^th, I created the Helton Cancer to Wellness Facebook group page to create awareness about my dad’s situation and a fundraising page on the Give Forward website. On Monday, January 16^th we started inviting people to join the Facebook group and the response was completely overwhelming! We had a couple of incredibly generous friends who offered to donate $1 for every person to join the group up to 1,000 people. Little did we know that we’d hit that mark in three short days! We had planned on linking to the Give Forward on Wednesday or Thursday of that week, but people were breaking down the gates to find out how to give, so we sent the link out on Tuesday. For the first five days, we averaged nearly $2,000 per DAY in donations. On day 10 – today - we’re currently at $11,330 in donations and the number continues to increase. Today, my friend Leslie did a post about my dad on her incredibly popular blog (over 180,000 readers in the last 28 days), Crunchy Betty. There have been anonymous donations rolling in all morning and I think we have her to thank! It’s pretty cool how much Leslie’s own personal standards match up with the Gerson Institute’s in regards to natural, chemical free products. I’m sure that my mom will be using her website as a reference very often in the near future. =)

For oh, so many reasons!

In the meantime, a massive effort is in force to put on a few different benefits for my dad. J.C.Cravers in Palm Harbor, FL is holding a chili cook-off with live music, raffle prizes, a silent auction. Several musician friends of our family are organizing a musical benefit in Springfield,IL… Tunes for Terry. There will also be a silent auction with hundreds of items. My friend Samantha and I are working on a donations-based yoga class for all levels here in Colorado Springs at Pranava Yoga Center. There will be door-prizes, treats and lots of fun! Another friend is doing her own fundraiser through her Pampered Chef business and yet another is representing Dad in the American Cancer Society’s Walk & Roll 2012. I am so amazed at all of the incredible love and support we have received in such a short period of time – we never expected to be able to send Dad to the Gerson Institute so quickly! With the donations we’ve received so far, we are able to afford the first two weeks at the Gerson. With the additional fundraising taking place, we are hoping to raise enough for the possible third required week (we won’t know until the first two weeks of therapy are completed), the $2,500 juicer required and to help with the continued cost of fresh, organic produce – nearly 20 pounds a day and $600 per week – for the next two years minimum.

Florida benefit flyer

Illinois benefit flyer

Colorado SEVA yoga class flyer

I am more than ecstatic to say that my parents arrived at the Gerson Institute and Cancer Curing Society this morning and that Dad begins treatment today. But, as I mentioned, we still have a long way to go to raise all of the necessary funds.

So, I have a challenge for you, dear reader…

I challenge you to take your lunch to work for one day or one week and then donate the money you would have spent eating out to my dad’s cause at http://www.giveforward.com/heltoncancertowellness . Will you take this easy challenge in order to help my dad on his amazing path from Cancer to Wellness?

~ ~ ~

Update 1/30/12… Well, it has been five days since I wrote the first part of this post, but I couldn't resist throwing in an update before posting because there have been major improvements in my dad’s health in just the five short days that he and my mom have been at the Gerson Institute! On day three, Dad went to pull on his compression socks and realized that his ankle, which has been swollen for the past year due to the blood clots, was no longer swollen! My mom also realized the same day that he slept on his right side the previous night and he hasn’t done that in quite some time since he has been in a great deal of pain due to the small amount of fluid around his right lung. He has been walking a minimum of four blocks each day… two blocks to the beach and two blocks back (more than he's been able to do in a year). Not a bad place to start healing! =) Today when I spoke to my mom, she informed me that the most exciting thing about today was finding out that Dad’s blood pressure is down and they are weaning him off of his blood pressure medication. I honestly don’t remember a time in my life when my dad has not had high blood pressure and been on medication for it. Wow. The are also working on weaning him off of his other medications slowly but surely. I am so impressed by the rapid progression of things so far! Mom and Dad still have a lot to learn and will begin a totally new lifestyle once they return home, but it will all be so worth it!!!

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Jon: I have Terry to thank for a helluva lot of things. He's been a constant source of love, support, and... of course... entertainment for many, many years. But he has officially earned a new high point of admiration from me. I don't say this simply because he has cancer. I say this because he has dared to break the mold, reject the conventional medical "treatments" of contaminating and defiling the body, and instead pursue a course of treatment that strengthens rather than weakens, heals rather than poisons, and promotes healthy nutrients rather than toxic chemicals.

Two Gerson patients (Terry is second from right) and
three companions walking along the beach

For many years, I have considered myself a strong proponent of natural healing over manufactured medicines. But I will readily admit to thinking that Terry was bat-shit crazy a few years ago when he started talking about replacing chemotherapy and radiation with mass-nutrient ingestion. I remember talking to Hethyr about how I just couldn't understand why you wouldn't battle cancer with all the twenty-first century medical technology available, no matter how much life the treatment sucked from your mind and body. I thought he was downright suicidal.

Oh, I guess he's BIRD-shit crazy.

But Terry, despite the conflicting opinions of nearly everyone around him, continued to believe with all his heart that there was a better path to wellness. His natural remedies were rather eccentric for a while, including a period of time when he was vegan and taking about fifty supplements a day. Did I mention I used to think the man was bat-shit crazy? But he pressed on, always searching for a way to self-heal. And then, after a long road full of some highs and many more lows, Terry discovered the Gerson Institute.

Picture from Gerson Institute's Facebook photo albums

After learning about the philosophy, the history, the treatment plan, and the successes of Gerson Therapy, and after hearing about Terry's improvements after less than a week at the clinic, I am a true believer. Despite my "earthy" principles and ideals, I doubt that I would've had the guts to take the steps that Terry has with his life on the line. But now that he ventured down that road, and only because he had the audacity to do so, I know that I could as well. Thanks for your courage, Terry. You are an amazing guy.

On the Road Again

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sat, 07 Jan 2012 22:08:00 +0000

“When preparing to travel, lay out all your clothes and all your money. Then take half the clothes and twice the money." ~Unknown

Hethyr: That is some great advice. I only wish I'd had it prior to our last vacation! Jon and I are suckers for a good road trip, as evidenced by our latest adventure. We drove from Colorado Springs, Colorado to Tarpon Springs, Florida and back (with a short stop in New Orleans on the way home) over the holidays. That is why you, dear readers, haven’t heard from us in a while!

My family (minus a few!) on Xmas - Happy Holidaze!

The one part of preparing for a long trip like this that I abhor is planning what we’re going to eat. We refuse to eat fast food and we don’t eat at chain restaurants, so there are very few options for food along the way. Which means that I get to plan all of our breakfasts, lunches, snacks and dinners – woo hoo! Don’t get me wrong, I love to cook, but eating on the road is much more difficult than eating at home. First, there isn’t a microwave or oven in our car, which is where we end up eating most of our meals. Why the hell hasn’t someone addressed this obvious omission from automobile designs?! Second, refrigerator (and by refrigerator, I mean a cooler with ice) space is limited, so most of our food has to be shelf-stable. What a pain in the arse.

Jon has actually apologized to me (!) for planning certain surprise vacations because he knows how much time it takes me to get the food planned and made. Ha! Although I may complain a little, I’ll always gladly take the vacation in trade for making the food. I will say that I was absolutely thrilled that I didn’t have to do much cooking while we were gone – I guess it all balanced out. Thanks for feeding me while I was home, family! =)

Jaymen & Tayvn making everyone
banana pancakes for breakfast.
They did all of the work - I just
instructed and tended the griddle!

Enjoying their culinary masterpiece...
with homemade whipped cream
& strawberries, of course!

Uncle Mike sneaking turkey. =)

One thing that I’ve struggled with is finding enough variety to keep us satisfied... there are only so many things you can eat in the car. After countless Google searches for things like ‘road trip food,’ ‘healthy eating on the road,’ ‘easy dinners for the car,’ etc. and not coming up with much of anything helpful, we’ve decided to do our own post. I feel like there have to be others out there like us who have a tough time deciding what food to take on the road and hopefully this will help.

BREAKFAST - This one is probably one of the easiest things for most people to plan, including me. Here is a list of some ideas…

Muffins / breads (regular or gluten-free) - See some of our favorite muffin recipes here and here. And check out a couple of good quick bread recipes here and here.

Bagels with Cream Cheese (store cream cheese in the cooler)

Fruit that travels well… apples, oranges, grapes, bananas (stay away from soft fruits like peaches, apricots, plums, etc. – you’ll end up with a sticky mess)

Hard-boiled eggs (cooler)

Cooked bacon – Bacon is just as good cold as it is hot (store in the cooler)!

Yogurt and granola – Store yogurt in the cooler in individual small jars or containers, then just add the granola. I made this yummy Gingerbread Granola from Neo-Homesteading. I used cashews instead of peanuts, nutmeg in place of the cinnamon and dried chunks of apple instead of raisins. I left most of it with my sister Fayre’s family (her kids love granola!) and some with my parents since I can always make more at home. =)

Scones (regular or gluten-free)

Cinnamon Rolls – Keep the icing in a small jar and just dip chunks of the roll into the jar. I kept both in the cooler. Check out these Gluten-Free Pumpkin Cinnamon Rolls from The Hip Girl’s Guide to Homemaking. Although mine were cinnamonLESS rolls due to my allergy (I used nutmeg, cardamom and cloves) and although they weren’t as pretty as Kate’s (they didn’t rise at all – I’m pretty sure my water wasn’t warm enough to activate the yeast properly), they sure tasted good. I also used a packaged GF flour mix + xanthan gum in place of her GF flour mixture. Here is a not-so-pretty picture of my unrisen cinnamonless roll… sounds appetizing, doesn't it?!

SNACKS – A pretty easy thing to plan, but we often get bored with the same old things. Here is a list of our staples plus a few new (to us) yummies…

Beef Jerky - we buy ours from Ranch Foods Direct (no antibiotics, hormones or preservatives, vegetarian fed, humanely raised and harvested)

Natural Chips – potato or other veggies like beets or sweet potatoes

Cooked and shelled edamame (cooler)

Individual applesauce containers

Granola bars or Lärabars – I love this blog post from Enlightened Cooking for homemade Lärabars. This time we tried one of my creations - Mango-Cardamom.

Popcorn – Jon always pops a big batch before a road trip!

Fruit - See Breakfast.

Hummus with veggies or pita crisps (hummus & veggies in the cooler)

Crackers and cheese – For those of you with food sensitivities like me, check out these great grain-free Sesame Crackers and gluten-free/grain-free Multi "Grain" Crackers from Elana’s Pantry. Store cheese in the cooler.

String Cheese (cooler)

Trail mix or nuts and dried fruit – I made a couple of different nut recipes for this road trip and both were quickly devoured. See these posts for Vanilla Roasted Walnuts and Candied Macadamia Nuts from Elana’s Pantry. Careful – they’re addictive!

LUNCH/DINNER – This is probably the toughest thing for me to plan, but I’ve come up with a couple of good ideas that always work for us. This time I wanted to add something new to the repertoire, so I tried the spring rolls and they worked perfectly! I store all of these things in the cooler.

Sandwiches – PB & J, lunchmeat with cheese, chicken or tuna salad, egg salad, etc, etc, etc. Endless options.

* Wraps – See below for one of my favorite wrap recipes (this one isn’t gluten-free). Also infinite possibilities.

Pasta Salad – Think outside the box. Of course, a standard Italian-style pasta salad is always good, but how about Mexican or Asian? Get creative!

Grain Salad – For this trip, I made a Greek-style brown rice salad which included roasted red peppers, Kalamata olives, red onion, feta cheese, cooked and cubed chicken, oregano, parsley and a Greek vinaigrette made with red wine vinegar, lemon juice and olive oil. The possibilities are endless with this one… try different grains, vegetables, cheeses, beans and/or meats and vinaigrettes. Another of my favorites included barley, asparagus, toasted walnuts and Gorgonzola cheese with a honey-lime dressing.

Greek grain salad

* Spring Rolls – This was my most recent stroke of genius. No one thinks to make these ahead of time since they can easily dry out, but I stored them in an airtight container with damp paper towels and they were great for about 3 or 4 days. See below for my awesome recipe.

Coleslaw – Here’s a recipe for Pretty Chopped Slaw from The Sensitive Pantry that’s really good.

* Tomatoes and Mozzarella with Balsamic-Pistachio Dressing – my sister Fayre’s awesome creation that I just had to include. This will be with us on our next road trip! See below for the recipe.

Turkey, Bacon and Avocado Wraps

Makes 4

www.how-to-draw-cartoons-online.com

~4 large whole wheat tortillas

~4 ounces cream cheese

~2 cups fresh baby spinach

~1 to 1 ½ cups cooked, shredded turkey

~4 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled

~1 or 2 avocados, pitted and sliced

~¼ to ½ cup Annie’s Natural’s Papaya Poppy Seed Dressing (or a sweet vinaigrette of your choice)

1. Assembly line-style, spread cream cheese evenly on one side of tortillas, then top with equal amounts of baby spinach, shredded turkey, bacon, avocado slices and dressing. Fold in sides of tortilla, then roll from the bottom up.

2. To store, wrap in plastic wrap, then place in a reusable container or storage bag. Keep cold until ready to eat.

Spring Rolls with Cashew Dipping Sauce

Makes 16 (enough for about 3 meals for the two of us)

~2 large carrots, peeled and julienned

~2 large celery stalks, julienned

~½ cup scallions, julienned

~½ large red bell pepper, julienned

~1 small kohlrabi, peeled and julienned

~2 tablespoons fresh cilantro, chopped

~1 tablespoon fresh mint, chopped

~2-inch knob of ginger, peeled and minced

~2 thin slices turkey, julienned

~4 ounces brown rice noodles, cooked (see
package for instructions) and drained

~16 rice paper wrappers

~¼ cup cashew butter (you can use peanut
butter if you prefer)

~¼ cup coconut milk

~1 tablespoon fish sauce

~1 ½ teaspoons crushed red pepper flakes (or to taste)

1. Mix carrots, celery, scallions, bell pepper, kohlrabi, cilantro, mint, ginger, turkey and brown rice noodles in a large bowl.

2. Soak one rice paper wrapper in warm water for about 15 seconds (or until soft and pliable), then remove.

3. Lay rice paper wrapper on a flat surface (I used a cutting board) and fill with one-sixteenth of the veggie mixture. Fold in sides of wrapper, then roll from the bottom up.

4. Repeat with remaining wrappers and filling.

5. Store in the refrigerator (or cooler) in layers in an airtight container, separating each layer with very damp towels or paper towels.

6. In a small bowl, mix together the cashew butter, coconut milk, fish sauce and crushed red pepper flakes. Store in the refrigerator in an airtight container with a lid. Use as a dipping sauce for the spring rolls.

Fayre's Tomato and Mozzarella Salad with Balsamic Pistachio Dressing

Serves 4 to 6 as a side dish

~3 or 4 large tomatoes, cut into chunks

~4 ounces fresh mozzarella or bocconcini, cut
into chunks

~1/2 cup shelled pistachios

~3 tablespoons balsamic vinegar

~1/4 to 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil

~Salt and pepper, to taste

1. Place pistachios and balsamic vinegar in a food processor and pulse a few times.

2. While motor is running, drizzle in olive oil through the food chute until you reach your desired consistency. Season with salt and pepper.

3. Gently, toss all ingredients together in a large bowl. Sprinkle with chopped parsley to garnish (optional).

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Jon: Life on the road sure was a helluva lot easier back in the days when we willingly ate disgusting, deadly, non-food products from places like McDonald's and Taco Bell. Cheap, fast, easy meals were available everywhere we went. But now that we have committed ourselves to a life of eating food that won't send us to an early and extra-large grave, it has become a real pain in the ass to eat away from home. Even when we arrived in Florida and our family was trying to accommodate our snobbish eating standards, it was tough for them to manage due to the lack of healthy, natural options. Regardless, with no small amount of effort, we were able to eat loads of delicious food on our voyage.

Hethyr's traveling food was excellent. Thanks to her, we were able to eat well for 3891 miles. Impressive. But we always prefer it when someone else can feed us good food, so we searched far and wide for quality eateries with a decent amount of success. We found an awesome burrito lounge in Montgomery that met our natural/local/sustainable requirements. Yep, you heard me... a burrito lounge. It was some sort of Mexican hipster joint - like Sancho Panza meets Frank Sinatra... in Alabama. The place was so awesomely bizarre that I wasted about 20 bucks on a hideous powder-blue burrito lounge shirt that I'll probably only wear while painting. We also found a vegetarian cafe in Amarillo, Texas, where we had a pretty lame lunch. But if you ask me - which you didn't, but I'll tell you anyway - everything is lame in Texas. The very best food that others made for us, however, undoubtedly came out of New Orleans.

The shirts are as confusing as the ambiance

We spent a whirlwind 36 hours in NOLA, including oysters and Bloody Mary's at Dickie Brennan's on Bourbon Street, a creepy cemetery tour, a visit to Trent Reznor's old mansion in the garden district, beignets at Cafe du Monde, a foggy stroll down the Riverwalk, streetcar rides, flounder muniere and a seafood platter at Brigtsen's, French Market shopping, New Year's Eve midnight fireworks, pizza and squash ravioli at Marigny Brasserie, sidewalk jazz jams, navigation through masses of drunken idiots, a New Orleans Saints-related traffic jam, and at least a dozen miles of walking. We left town fat, happy, tired, and totally broke. And much like going to Vegas, 36 hours was enough.

G-Rated version of Bourbon St.

So for all of you fellow food snobs, I hope that you put Hethyr's ideas to good use on your next road trip. I also hope that when you feel the overwhelming desire for food cooked and served by someone else that there is a hipster burrito lounge nearby. Happy travels...

Yumbo in the Gumbo

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 23:14:00 +0000

Jeff, Daisy and Maya

Hethyr: A few years ago a very close friend of ours left this world too soon. It was close to his 50^th birthday, which happened to coincide with our anniversary – October 27^th. Since his passing, I’ve made a big batch of (my version of) his gumbo around this time every year to celebrate his life. Although we’re posting this a couple of months late, I did make the last batch around the end of October and we’re still enjoying it from the freezer. This recipe, like most, has a sort of story to go along with it…

I first struck up a conversation with him at the bar at Front Range Barbeque and, oddly enough, I remember it having something to do with facial moisturizer. WTF? A rather bizarre conversation for a late 20-something girl and a late 40-something guy to be having in a crowded bar, right? Well, that was the beginning of many strange and wonderful conversations with Jeff.

Love of bluegrass and good beer brought us together, but we found many other commonalities as well. He loved to cook and actually taught me a lot about food and cooking before I became a chef. We ended up in the same close circle of friends and did everything together for a few years before he left us. He had this awesome childlike excitement about EVERYTHING and it was totally contagious. He was also hilariously ~~anal~~ over the top when it came to learning about something new or getting involved in a new hobby. He would research it thoroughly and then send his friends an email about all that he had learned. Then he would talk about it incessantly for the next few weeks. I miss those emails and chats a lot now and wish I could have them back. But at least I have the good memories.

Christmas at our house 2007 - Dottie and Jeff

Well, one year I was planning and making the food for the Mardi Gras bash at Cucuru Gallery Café and I asked Jeff if he had a good, authentic recipe for gumbo and/or red beans and rice since his family is from southwest Louisiana. I had no idea what I was getting myself into by asking that question! He knew that I knew how to cook, but this was the email response I received anyway (I’m leaving out a lot of it to spare you, but I’m sharing the parts I found funny or interesting. I’m also leaving out the actual recipe since I’ll give you my version below.)...

“Hey, I've never written the beans and rice recipe down, but I've tried Emeril Lagasse's version and it's awesome. Some folks can't stand that guy, but he makes very authentic Cajun…

Here's my gumbo recipe. It's the way that my mom and grandmothers made it in southwest Louisiana. It's the way gumbo is supposed to taste. Not like what most restaurants serve. The sausage is one of the most important ingredients. If you can't find the sausage that I recommend (impossible to find in CO), try to find a good slow-smoked (hickory) sausage. Or you can substitute about 2 tablespoons of Colgin's liquid hickory smoke.

...

Difficulty: Difficult (but damned worth it)

…

Make the roux (while chicken is roasting):
CAUTION!! - This stuff will be over 350 degrees and will cause 2nd degree burns!! Combine oil and flour in a large heavy pot (cast-iron is best) over medium heat (add more oil if needed to make a runny paste texture). Stir slowly and constantly for about 30 minutes until about the color of a milk chocolate bar (slightly lighter). It's very important that you do not stop stirring no matter what!! Burning will happen in only a few seconds if not stirred and will make the roux taste bitter. If this happens, throw it out and start over. Note: It helps to have a 'real' stove hood that vents to the outside as this process will smell up the whole house if you have one of those hoods that blows it back into the kitchen (what's up with that?).

…

Remove from the heat, allow gumbo to rest for a few minutes, and skim off fat. Stir in the parsley and half of the green onions. That's it!! You're done.

Serve over rice (making sure to remove the bay leaves as you serve). Garnish with a sprinkle of chopped green onions and a dash of 'gumbo filé'. Enjoy!!

Note: Gumbo, like most soups, chili, etc. will taste better after sitting in the fridge overnight.”

So, that was the email with about two-thirds of it removed. See what I mean about him being over the top? But this is honestly one of the best gumbo recipes I’ve ever had and he really did give GREAT instructions because my first batch got his seal of approval and he was super-picky about gumbo. I also got this comment from one of my long-time clients whose family moved to Colorado Springs from Baton Rouge a few years ago…

“OMG!!! Awesome gumbo!!! Jeff gave you truly an authentic LA gumbo recipe... And the good kind... Normally the lower south cook a creole gumbo and call that gumbo...NOT!! True gumbo has to have a dark roux and you cooked it perfectly... I know for sure he is looking down smiling...”

Makes me feel good to know that I can carry on his tradition. I just wish he were still here to enjoy it with us.

One more thing that I feel needs to be addressed… I’ve had people tell me that this isn’t true gumbo since it doesn’t include okra. I have found out that this is not the case. Gumbos can be categorized by the type of thickener used: okra, filé OR roux. Jeff’s version, and therefore my version, uses roux and filé. I’m sure it would also be great with some okra thrown in, but I’ve never seen the need to add it – it’s perfect as is!

This is a pretty difficult recipe because it requires a LOT of hands-on time during the first hour or so but it is SO worth the time and effort. Just be sure to make a gigantic batch so you don’t have to do it very often (it freezes wonderfully!). I usually only make it twice a year – around Mardi Gras and again around Jeff’s birthday – but we enjoy it out of the freezer for months. I hope you like it as much as we do.

Hethyr's Jeff’s Chicken and Sausage Gumbo

Serves 12 (although I usually double that!)

2 whole chickens, cut into pieces (legs, wings, breasts, etc.)
3 tablespoons Cajun Spice Blend (see recipe below)
1 cup + 1 tablespoon oil, divided
1 cup all-purpose flour
10 cups water or chicken stock (I love to use homemade stock made from the carcass and scraps from the cooked chicken)
2 cups yellow onion, chopped
½ cup celery, chopped (feel free to use the celery leaves, too)
¾ cup green bell pepper, seeded, ribbed and chopped
3 pounds Andouille sausage, cut in half lengthwise, then cut into half moon slices (contrary to Jeff’s comment, it can be found in Colorado Springs at Ranch Food Direct)
1 teaspoon cayenne
3 bay leaves
Salt
¼ cup parsley, chopped
1 cup green onion, chopped
8 to 10 cups cooked rice
Gumbo filé powder (optional)
12 hard-boiled eggs (Jeff did NOT use eggs in his gumbo, but his brother Philip does and that’s where this addition came from – we love it, so it stuck)

1. Preheat oven to 400ºF; rub chicken with 1 tablespoon of oil and 1 tablespoon of spice blend. Place in a large oven-safe baking dish and bake for 40 minutes or until you can easily remove the meat from the bones (reserve bones for homemade chicken broth if you’d like!). When it’s cool enough to touch, remove the meat and shred. Cool.

2. Make the roux (as Jeff said, this stuff can cause nasty burns, so be careful - I usually wear long oven mitts while I stir): Combine flour and oil in a large heavy pot over medium heat. Stir slowly and constantly for about 30 to 35 minutes or until it’s slightly lighter than a milk chocolate bar. It’s very important that you don’t stop stirring because it can burn in a few seconds and it will make the roux taste bitter. If that happens, throw it out and start again.

The roux should be "slightly lighter than a milk
chocolate bar" according to Jeff.

3. When the roux is finished, add the onions, celery and green pepper and continue to stir for about 5 minutes or until wilted. Add the sausage, remaining 2 tablespoons of Cajun Spice Blend, cayenne, bay leaves and chicken stock and stir until well combined. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low and simmer, uncovered, stirring occasionally, for 2 hours (add more liquid if/when necessary).

4. Add shredded chicken, adjust salt and simmer on low heat for 1 hour more (add more liquid if/when necessary).

5. Remove from heat, allow gumbo to rest for a few minutes and skim off fat. Remove bay leaves and stir in half of the green onions and parsley.

6. To serve, place equal amounts of rice in bowls, top with gumbo, sprinkle with filé, plop a boiled egg on top and finish with remaining parsley and green onions. Best with good friends and beer!

Cajun Spice Blend

Note: This makes a lot, but only use the amount called for in the recipe – you’ll have extra.

2 ½ tablespoons paprika
1 tablespoon salt
2 tablespoons garlic powder
1 tablespoon black pepper
1 tablespoon onion powder
1 tablespoon cayenne pepper
1 tablespoon dried oregano
1 tablespoon dried thyme

1. Mix all ingredients together and store in an airtight container.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jon: You might be surprised to hear about the quality of gumbo that is created here in the Pikes Peak foothills. Every year as a kickoff to Manitou Springs’ Carnivale celebration, the Mumbo Jumbo Gumbo competition attracts dozens of exceptional entries from locals and far-reaching travelers. Our friend Brian, who owns Front Range Barbeque on the West side of town, has won the professional division with his Alabama-born recipe, our friend Jonny has won the amateur division with his Wisconsin-born recipe, and our friends Travis and Whitney have won the amateur division with their Lousiana-born recipe. Few things are quite as enjoyable as wandering through Manitou's Soda Springs Park and sampling gumbo after gumbo... a nice late-morning gorging on Southern stew.

Jeff never entered his gumbo into the Mumbo Jumbo Gumbo competition and Hethyr hasn't either. However, there is no doubt in my mind that this recipe would be a serious contender for the crown. No disrespect to the finely crafted dishes of our friends and the other worthy strangers who compete, but this gumbo is HANDS DOWN the best I have ever tasted. This high-altitude Cajun concoction is as good as it gets.

It is no surprise that such an amazing creation originated from Jeff. He emitted a wealth of great ideas, brilliantly useful and useless knowledge, profoundly creative innovation, and all-around positive energy. He researched nutrition for humans and dogs to an encyclopedic degree, investigated the validity of current recycling practices, assembled M*A*S*H-worthy camping shelters, studied constellations, constructed the world's greatest camping beer cozy (see below)... all while managing to behave like a kid in a candy store over all the incredible wonders of the world. Not a week after I told him I would begin pursuing a career in teaching did he buy me Teaching for Dummies. The dude was always looking for the perfect answers. It stands to reason that such a guy would create the world's greatest gumbo.

If you have the gusto to embark on the sophisticated task of making gumbo - the mother of all edible creations - then it should be this one. Jeff would be happy that his recipe lives on, and he would most certainly hope that you would find enjoyment in the scientific culinary process of the great gumbo adventure.

Las Aventuras de Los Cerdos Glotónes en Santa Fe

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 18:13:00 +0000

Hethyr: Jon and I just got back from a couple of foodies’ dream-adventure. He has been so amazing about surprising me with an anniversary trip almost each of the 10 years that we’ve been married (there were a couple there where we were WAY too low on funds to go anywhere, so I’ll cut him some slack there) and this year he took me to Santa Fe. It’s only a few hours drive but we’d never been there and had always talked about going. Although the crowd was, on average, a bit older than we’d expected (read lack of nightlife) and there was virtually no music scene, we managed to make every second of the trip enjoyable. To their complete credit, they’ve got an AMAZING food scene and, in the end, that’s what we’re really after on a vacation. In fact, almost every restaurant that we went to was part of the Farm to Restaurant Project which made us both very happy! Here is our belated 10^th anniversary trip in photo journal form. A few of the pictures were taken with our cell phones, so the quality isn't great. And since I mentioned it, if anyone would like to buy me a super-awesome camera, I’d love to improve the quality of some of the photos on our blog! Ha! Okay, just dreaming. Maybe one of these days!

Night 1... Dinner at La Plazuela at La Fonda


Our appetizer was the Grilled Bosc Pear, but we forgot to take pictures!

My dinner: Felix River Ranch (local) Lamb Shank with
White Bean-Poblano Succotash and Green Beans


Jon had the Enchiladas del Norte... two rolled corn tortillas filled with chicken and topped with local Hatch green chile and two eggs!


Dessert consisted of Mousse Shots - Vanilla Bean, Key Lime (my fave!), Peanut Butter and Chocolate Malt

Day 2... Breakfast at French Pastry Shop, shopping, art, beer, dinner at Cafe Pasqual's

I swore I was not going to get Nutella for breakfast but
as soon as I ordered the Banana Crepe and the server asked
if I wanted to add Nutella, I said yes.
Complete lack of self-control.

A block, a rock and a crock (or two) of salt
and a bottle of 18-year aged balsamic vinegar

The sweet bike I bought before I found out it didn't run. ;)

There is almost always a colorful backdrop in
Santa Fe whether it's chiles drying or ladies'
clothing.

Colorful cocks in a kitchen store. Tee hee.

Hahahaha... they said "Faux Sheared Beaver."
Did I mention we're incredibly juvenile?

Jon's reflection in a shiny owl.

We wandered upon this sculpture garden by
chance. It was a great example of the
wonderful art all over Santa Fe.

From Wikipedia...
"Yin... is the dark area occluded by the mountain's
bulk, while yang... is the brightly lit portion.
As the sun moves across the sky, yin and yang
gradually trade places with each other, revealing
what was obscured and obscuring what was revealed."
I love the that sun shining on my face shows
this exactly!

Santa Fe makes average photographers
look like pros. ;)

Furniture made of stone - at least when it's in a reclined
position with a footstool - is surprisingly comfy!

Jon at Project Tibet. That Buddha was huge! I felt
such a sense of peace and calm throughout the garden,
courtyard and shops. I asked Jon about it later and he said
he felt the same thing.

Kali statue that I loved at Project Tibet.

The bronze dog statues along Canyon Road
were among Jon's favorites.

One art, please!


This was actually a water feature - a stream of water shoots out of the mouth - but we snapped the picture on the day the gallery was closed.

Being my usual monkey-self.

I would be really sad, too, if I had an eyeball
in the middle of my chest.

Time for a break on the patio at the Marble Brewery
Tap Room.


The plaza... most things are closed on Mondays, so it was a bid devoid of life.

Although he seems to be double-fisting it, that
second beer was actually mine. =)


Neither of us could get enough of Jon's dinner at Cafe Pasqual's... Acorn Squash stuffed with Mushroom Cream Soup and topped with Pomegranate Arils, served with Red Quinoa and Garlic French Bread - YUM!

My dinner was a little less exotic since the meal I opted for
first contained cinnamon and I'm allergic. I ended up with
Dos Tacos Barbacoa - a bit bland, but still good.

Day 3... Massages at High Desert Healthcare & Massage, bead shopping, lunch at The Shed (we forgot to take pictures!), rainbows, dinner at La Casa Sena (where we were "surprised" by the staff singing Broadway tunes!)


Santa Fe has some really great bead shops! We bought Jon the two large pendants and I get the strand of turquoise. He's been bugging me to make him new necklaces for a few years - guess it's time I finally accommodate.

Full rainbow after a cold rain.

Dinner at La Casa Sena (another farm-to-table restaurant)...
I had Red Chile-Crusted Pork Tenderloin with Mashed Sweet
Potatoes, Puréed Peaches and Apple-Mint Salsa - delicious!

However, I kept stealing bites of Jon's New Mexico Beef
Ribeye with Sautéed Chard and Green Chile
Mashed Potatoes. That is some of the tastiest beef I've
ever had. And Green Chile Mashed Potatoes? Genius!


Of course we couldn't stop with dinner... dessert was Lavender Crème Brûlée with Habanero Sugar. And, of course, we forgot to take pictures until it was almost gone.

Day 4... Santa Fe Farmers' Market, lunch at The Station, more art, dinner and bluegrass at Back Road Pizza


Walking in to the Santa Fe Farmers' Market... we bought a colorful bunch of dried chiles from this booth to hang on our front door.

Jon bought breakfast from the Intergalactic Bread stand...
Green Chile and Cheese Flatbread.

I bought three varieties of carrots from this stand...
gold, purple and orange.

Pretty produce in the early morning light.

I also bought some of this freshly milled Whole Grain
Blue Cornmeal from Talon de Gato Farm.

Chiles, chiles everywhere!

We bought some heads of garlic from this guy.

More pretty produce including some purple & green kale.

At the South Mountain Dairy stand, we
purchased some Green Chile Squeaky Curds
and some Chipotle Ribbon Havarti.

Although the market was in the Railyard,
it was anything but run-down.

Lunch at The Station... Jon got the Brie,
Bacon and Turkey Panini and I got the
Chunky Potato Soup with Italian-Style
Meatballs. Another farm-to-table
restaurant - they make it easy to eat well!

New Mexico Rail Runner at the Railyard.

A couple of the naughty carrots we bought
at the market. =)

One of our favorite gallery displays - at Galerie Züger.

Such pride and strength portrayed!

¿¡Dónde están mis pantalones!?

Beautiful tree pose.

Such life in this sculpture!

Pizza, beer and bluegrass at Back Road Pizza,
which has been featured on the Food
Network's "Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives."

Day 5... Breakfast at Clafoutis (we forgot pictures again, but I had Coconut French Toast and Jon had Waffles with Fresh Fruit), hiking and Ojo Caliente Mineral Springs

Hiking near Ojo Caliente - the weather was perfect!

Love.

We saw this along the trail... happy belated 10th
anniversary to us!

After several miles, we were ready to head
back to Ojo Caliente for some much-needed
soaking, although we didn't take pictures of
that part of the trip. We did rent a private pool
for a couple of hours around dusk. It was
amazing watching the stars come out and I
even saw a shooting star. Perfect end to a
perfect trip!

Rocks and a pottery shard I found while hiking.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jon: There are lots of important elements to an awesome vacation. Well, actually there's just one. Food. Really good food. Which is why any successful vacation must be well-designed. It must include a two-phase plan, including (1) where to eat and (2) how to best waste time in between meals. Hethyr and I kick ass at executing this plan.

With the savvy use of that crazy interwebby thing, determining the location of our next meal was a breeze. As Hethyr mentioned, there are dozens of farm-to-table restaurants in Santa Fe, which made me quite happy (and slightly depressed upon returning to the factory-to-table restaurants of the Springs). After gorging on all the aforementioned farmy goodness, phase two began. Knowing that burning calories was our best way to eat again sooner rather than later, we chose to walk as much as possible in between meals . When movement became too physically unbearable, phase two's backup plan was implemented: Drink. Few things increase the desire to masticate quite like a beer in the belly. Oh yeah, and sitting in a hot tub works too. I believe it is the sound of the water jets that remind me of a stomach growling, thereby fooling myself into believing I am ravenously hungry when I actually am stuffed full of cheese and green chiles like some sort of freakish walking enchilada.

So it went for five gloriously relaxing days. Food, food, and more food, satisfying the most primal of needs (or at least one of the top two). Oh yeah, and the art and shit was nice too.

Upon returning home, it was conveniently time to go to sleep, wake up, and begin the process of our Thanksgiving day gorging... a nice buffer in between the pseudo-world of vacation and the real-world of home. Thankful for gluttony? You betcha.

Happy National Eat 'Til You Puke Day!

Stuffin' Things

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 15:34:00 +0000

*** HAPPY 38TH ANNIVERSARY TO MY WONDERFUL PARENTS!!! ***

Note: We're posting this several days after it was written - we've been busy!


Pomegranates make you work for their yummy goodness, but they are worth the work.

Hethyr: I have been so busy with clients over the last few weeks that I’ve barely had time to cook for Jon and myself at home. He’s made grilled cheese or quesadillas a few times this week, which is great, but we’ve run out of some of our basics and I think we’ve both been craving something a little more “classy.” So, from Friday night until now, I’ve been cooking up a storm. Sometimes, that’s just the way it goes at our house. I have to catch up whenever I can and that often means on the weekends. Last weekend was grocery shopping and this weekend has been cooking. I picked up a couple of special Fall items from Whole Foods last weekend, including a couple of pomegranates and some clementines, to use in the recipe for this blog post.

After cooking for a client on Friday, I made barbecue chicken and smoked mozzarella pizza for dinner. It was so loaded with goodies, we could each only eat one piece, so we had the rest for lunch the next day. Saturday, starting around the ass-crack of dawn, I made yogurt starter (so I can keep making new batches of yogurt without having to buy new cultures), yogurt (from an entire gallon of milk!), four loaves of whole-wheat sandwich bread (using the whey drained off of a previous batch of yogurt) and stuffed winter squash for dinner (see recipe below!). This morning I started a huge batch of chicken and andouille sausage gumbo (which took most of the day to cook and about which we’ll blog in the near future), then moved on to a batch of chicken stock (from the leftover chicken bones and scraps), a couple of dozen hard-boiled eggs (to serve with the gumbo) and eight loaves of artisan bread (which Jon calls “nipple bread” due to the shape and which I’m still in the process of baking). Man, I’m a masochist. But what else are a couple of busy foodies to do?

It made me laugh out loud yesterday when my dad responded to the picture of the sandwich bread that I posted on Facebook (see picture at left) with “I expect this for Christmas now.” He’ll probably get it, too. For now, we’ll freeze most of our bread, gumbo and stock since I only get occasional chances to cook for us, but we’ll eat some of the gumbo and fresh bread for dinner tonight. Yum!

Between cooking for clients and cooking for us, I’ve been in the kitchen nearly non-stop since last Monday. So tomorrow, I’m taking the day off from cooking. I’m going to balance out with some a.m. yoga, volunteer in Jon’s classroom in the afternoon and, to treat him for his birthday later this week (and to treat myself for all of the hard work that I’ve put in this weekend!), we’re going out for sushi tomorrow night.

POM-a-POM-a-POM-a-POM-a-POM-a-POM-eleon Stuffed Squash

Serves 3 to 6 (depending on the size of your appetite!)

6 small winter squash (I used Gold Nugget), halved and seeded
¾ cup honey
¼ cup pomegranate juice
2 tablespoons butter
2 small cippolini onions (or shallots), sliced
2 tablespoons mixed herbs (I used thyme, rosemary and sage), minced
2 cups cooked brown rice
1 cup cooked, shredded chicken
¾ cup toasted walnuts, chopped, divided use
¾ cup pomegranate arils (from 1 pomegranate), divided use
2 small clementines, peeled and pieces separated and halved
1/2 cup Gorgonzola cheese, crumbled
Salt and pepper

1. Preheat oven to 375°F; place squash halves cut-side-down in a 13- x 9-inch baking dish and add about 1-inch of water to the pan. Bake for 30 minutes, then remove from oven.

2. Meanwhile, combine honey and pomegranate juice in a small saucepan and bring to a boil over medium heat. Reduce heat and simmer for 10 to 15 minutes or until slightly thickened. Set aside.

3. Melt butter in a small skillet over medium heat. Add sliced cippolini onions and chopped herbs and cook until onions are translucent, about 4 to 5 minutes.

4. In a large bowl, combine onion-herb mixture with cooked rice, cooked and shredded chicken, ½ cup chopped walnuts, ½ cup pomegranate arils, clementine pieces, Gorgonzola cheese and ¼ cup pomegranate honey. Season with salt and pepper.

5. Stuff squash halves with equal amounts of filling and place back in the baking dish (stuffed-side-up). With about 1-inch of water in the bottom of the dish, place it back in the oven and bake at 375°F for another 30 minutes.

6. Place squash on plates, drizzle with remaining pomegranate honey and top with remaining walnuts and pomegranate arils.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


Instead of a snowman, we built a squashman.

Jon: We swim in a deep sea of squash this time of year. All different sizes, various shapes, random colors, miscellaneous degrees of lumpiness... I rarely even know what kind of squash any of them are. Currently our squash inventory includes Yugoslavian Finger, Jarrahdale, pumpkin, Chirimen, Gold Nugget, and Hubbard. I don't even understand what most of those words mean. We have so many and we eat them often enough that even I have cooked more of them than I can count. Although admittedly I deal with them slightly less frequently since inadvertently blowing one up in the microwave.

I love eating things stuffed inside of other things, and squash is no exception. When Hethyr told me her plan for putting pomegranate, honey, rice, onions, nuts, clementines, chicken, and cheese inside of a squash, I gave her a resounding "huh?" I can't even begin to understand the intricacies of concocting such a dish. I can, however, understand the process of eating it, and I ate the hell out of this one. It was sweet and savory and sour all at the same time. The pomegranate seeds and walnuts gave it a nice crunch. This was one seriously intense dish. Did I mention I ate the hell out of it? It was delicious.

The pomegranate is a common symbol of prosperity and fertility in many ancient cultures and religions. If you have the skills to do it, I highly recommend making this recipe. May it bring you infinite wealth and piles of babies.

Man with One Chopstick Go Hungry

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sun, 23 Oct 2011 18:27:00 +0000

Pretty sure this is NOT
the name of the place
where we ate!
Pic from everfunny.com.

Hethyr: As I mentioned in the last post, my mom and dad were pretty adventurous eaters when I was a kid and my sisters and I were exposed to a variety of different cuisines. Our family frequented this one particular Chinese restaurant a couple of blocks away from our house and the food was always good, but the house dessert left a lot to be desired. The server would bring each of us a deep-fried banana and all six of us would giggle uncontrollably as soon as he or she left the table. I don’t know what it was about those bananas, but they were absolutely disgusting. I think maybe it was because the batter was really bitter-tasting and not at all sweet. It somehow became our “thing” to try to hide the bananas in our uneaten food (which we usually didn’t take home for some reason) without the staff finding them. It never worked. They always found the bananas and put them in take-home containers for us. I guess they had their own little joke.

Although I don’t torture Jon with deep-fried bananas (maybe I'll start), I often subject him to Asian food, which I love. Luckily he loves it, too. We still have a lot of great produce on hand, so last night I made a stir-fry to use up some of the veggies. The “recipe” was so easy that it actually took longer to prep the veggies than it did to cook the food. The whole meal took less time than it would have to run out for Asian take-out. Honestly. It really wasn’t a recipe, though... it was just me throwing a bunch of stuff in a pan at a fairly high temperature, adding a super-simple sauce and throwing it all on top of some brown rice. That’s actually my usual stir-fry “recipe” and no two stir-fries have ever been the same.

I'm wokkin' broccol-ay-ay!

As usual with my recipes, don’t let the ingredients list scare you. I always find ways to make things more difficult on myself, so I used every vegetable we had. You can use just two or three and it will still be delicious. You can add meat, seafood, tofu, beans, etc. for protein. The sauce is so amazingly easy, but it is my absolute favorite stir-fry sauce. Sweet, spicy and salty all at the same time. A damn party in my mouth. For a splash of brightness at the end, I garnish it with cilantro and for a nutty crunch, sesame seeds top it all off. Hope you enjoy this as much as we did. I ate a super-sized serving and thought about going back for seconds, but decided I'd let Jon eat lunch today.

Love You Long Time Stir-Fry

Serves 6

-1/4 cup soy sauce

-1/4 cup honey

-1/4 cup sweet chili sauce (such as Mae Ploy)

-2 tablespoons oil (I used coconut oil)

-1 teaspoon sesame oil

-2-inch piece ginger root, peeled and minced

-1 teaspoon garlic, minced

-2 scallions, sliced

-Approximately 6 cups fresh vegetables:

1 pound broccoli florets, cut small

1 pound cauliflower florets, cut small

1 medium kohlrabi, peeled and diced

1 medium turnip, peeled and julienned

2 medium carrots, peeled and sliced

1/2 small red cabbage, coarsely chopped

1 medium zucchini, quartered and sliced

-1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped, for garnish

-3 tablespoons sesame seeds (toasted if desired)

1. In a glass measuring cup or small bowl, combine soy sauce, honey and sweet chili sauce. Set aside.

2. Heat oils in a large skillet or wok over medium-high heat. Add ginger, garlic and scallions and stir-fry for 30 seconds or until fragrant.

3. Add broccoli, cauliflower, kohlrabi, turnip and carrots and stir-fry for 3 to 4 minutes or until broccoli is starting to turn bright green. Add cabbage and zucchini and continue to stir-fry until vegetables are crisp-tender, about 2 to 3 more minutes.

4. Remove skillet or wok from heat and stir in sauce.

5. If desired, spoon stir-fry over prepared rice in a serving dish and top with chopped cilantro and sesame seeds.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jon: There is something very satisfying about eating Asian food. A rice and veggie meal digests like a champ. Anytime I eat a stir-fry, I feel like I just did my body a favor. It's no random unexplainable occurrence that most Asians are thin and most Americans are fat. Swapping some meat and potatoes for some rice and veggies is good for the body and the soul.

I'm not sure, however, that I've experienced the pleasure of the deep-fried banana. Dunking a banana in a fryer seems to me like a great way to ruin a perfectly good piece of fruit. Actually, most Asians desserts freak me out a bit. But maybe that's another important key to Asian thinness... if we had unappealing desserts in this country, maybe we wouldn't choose to inhale an extra thousand calories and quarter cup of sugar immediately following a full meal. While a fortune cookie might look and taste like thin cardboard, it sure isn't going to add any new layers to your muffin top.

This stir fry felt a little like the grand finale send-off of some of our summer veggies. Broccoli, cauliflower, zucchini, kohlrabi, cabbage... see ya again in June. Swimming in a sea of soy sauce, honey, and chili sauce and floating on a bed of rice is a noble way for any vegetable to transition into winter hibernation.

Curry Me to Warmer Climes

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sun, 09 Oct 2011 18:58:00 +0000

Hethyr: Just a couple of days ago, I was in warm, sunny Florida visiting my family. Outdoor festivals, swimming, bike rides, long walks on the beach, baseball/softball games, boating, dinner and drinks on the patio. The weather was about as perfect as it gets… 80s and sunny with low humidity.

Tuesday in Florida

Yesterday, reality slapped me in the face when it snowed in Colorado Springs. Meh. I am not a cold-weather person, to say the very least. I am rendered completely useless by the slightest chill in the air. You may think that I’m a total idiot for living in Colorado since I don’t like the cold. You may be right.

Saturday in Colorado

The freezing temperatures and rain/snow put me in the mood for comfort food. I gave Jon a few options for dinner and we actually had a lot of trouble deciding on what we wanted because everything sounded so good. This time of year is great for produce here. We have the last of summer’s tomatoes, zucchini, green peppers and eggplant and the first of fall’s carrots, onions, potatoes and turnips. This makes for a cornucopia of choices when it comes to planning meals. Yeah, I just said cornucopia. Sometimes we end up with such a variety of produce in our fridge that I like to use a bunch of it up at once. Last night was one of those nights.

We ended up deciding on a curry, which was absolutely delicious. We are going to work our way through the other options over the next couple of days since we really wanted to have all of them. Today’s menu will consist of breakfast burritos with lots of veggies and beef chorizo, leftover curry for lunch and stuffed bell peppers for dinner. Tomorrow we’ll have a veggie frittata for lunch and eggplant parmigiano for dinner. Jon is one lucky man-guy this week!

When people ask me about my favorite things to cook, I always reply “ethnic foods.” I grew up in an Italian family, so Italian food is second-nature to me and I still love it. My parents were pretty adventurous eaters when we were kids, so I grew to love foods from other cultures as well. Although I thoroughly enjoy simply prepared dishes which highlight foods’ natural flavors, I also adore using herbs and spices to complement those same foods.

I have cabinets, drawers and bins full of spices and am constantly adding new and exotic items. My most recent gift from Jon was a collection of 12 salts from around the world. It is one of the best gifts I’ve ever received and I use the salts every single day. Um, I’m starting to get a little off the subject...

Anyway, when I was craving comfort food yesterday, I kept thinking about curry and that’s eventually what we ended up having. To me, the warm spiciness of curry was the perfect antidote to a cold and dreary day. I’ll give you the recipe for the version I made, but feel free to substitute any vegetables that you have on hand. And I realize that my ingredients list is lengthy, but I was just using things from my fridge – you don’t have to make yours this complicated. I served mine over brown basmati rice with saffron.

Mixed Vegetable Curry

Serves 6

2 tablespoons oil
2 tablespoons curry powder (your favorite blend)
1 tablespoon fresh ginger root, minced
1 teaspoon garlic, minced
1/2 small onion, diced into 1/2-inch pieces
2 small carrots, sliced 1/4-inch
2 small green peppers, seeded, ribbed and diced into 1/2-inch pieces
1 small turnip, quartered, then sliced 1/4-inch
1 1/2 cups coconut milk
1 cup chicken or vegetable stock or water
1 small kohlrabi, peeled and julienned 1/4-inch
2 small potatoes, cubed 3/4-inch
1 medium zucchini, cubed 3/4-inch
1 medium eggplant, cubed 3/4-inch
1/2 small red cabbage, chopped coarse
Cilantro, chopped for garnish
Crushed red pepper flakes (optional)

1. Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add curry powder, ginger and garlic and cook, stirring, for 2 minutes or until fragrant.

2. Add onion, green bell peppers, carrots and turnips and cook, stirring, for 5 minutes.

3. Add coconut milk and stock and bring to a boil. Add kohlrabi and potatoes and cook over medium heat for 10 minutes. Add stock or water a little at a time if sauce becomes too thick.

4. Add zucchini, eggplant and cabbage and cook for 5 more minutes or until vegetables are fork-tender.

5. Serve over rice and garnish with cilantro and red pepper flakes.

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Jon: Fall has always been my favorite time of year. I love the cool weather, the changing leaves, football, and even the start of school. Living in Colorado, the one major thing I miss during fall is the changing leaves. Yes, we have some colorful deciduous trees and tons of Aspens that transform to yellow prior to shedding their canopy, but it is nothing like what we experienced when living in the Midwest, and nothing even close to the visual ecstasy of our autumn in Boston. But one thing that I love about this time of year in Colorado is the unpredictable weather. I love the fact that we've had beautiful, cool, sunny weather for two weeks straight... then woke up to a cold, snowy Saturday morning.

The timing sucked for Hethyr, however. The cold weather hit just as I picked her up at the airport. As she mentioned, she can't handle the cold. Garr, our fat-free fourteen-year-old dog, is the only other creature I've met who shivers when it's 68 degrees. Hethyr and Garr spend most of the non-summer months wrapped up in blankets on the couch. They morph into two big frozen burritos, hibernating until the summer sun heats them back up sometime around June.

Garr-ito

While I'm ready for "comfort food" any time of year, it definitely tastes best when it is cold outside. The curry last night (and the monster burrito this morning) did, in fact, succeed in raising my comfort level. I love meals that can fill you up to the brink of bursting but still allow you to feel satisfied because it is all healthy veggies and grains. It's good food for the body, mind, and soul.

So the real question remains... when Hethyr ate the breakfast burrito this morning, was it cannibalism? Fortunately for her it will be warm again this upcoming week, so maybe she can shed her outer tortilla.

It's Not About Who Wins or Loses, It's All About Who Has the Best Darth Vader Mug

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 02:34:00 +0000

Hethyr: As Jon put it in a prior post, I’ve got mad skills. MAD skills. Like the kind of mad skills it takes to lose a cooking competition to a competitor who didn’t actually cook anything. These are the same kind of mad skills it takes to hit the mat out from under the ball while playing putt-putt. There are just so few people who can actually pull off something like that!

Anyway, at the competition this past weekend, the judges' taste buds were a little too "sensitive" for my flavorful dish. Their spokesman told me it was too sweet. Honey can be a little overwhelming! (Sarcasm thoroughly intended.) If it’s too sweet for you, you’ll probably want to go and put on you big girl panties! The other chef’s raw watermelon gazpacho was good, but a touch too bland for my wild taste buds. Hey, what can I say? I represent the Dark Side. I need a little excitement in my life!

"Perhaps I can find new
ways to motivate them."

Knowing Heather's angelic ways, I figured she would make something ultra-healthy with vegetables and/or fruit. I did want to include some produce, but I wanted to show that there are other great foods available at the farmers’ market as well. We were allowed a few additional items other that what we purchased at the market and I chose raw cream, homemade butter and a couple of spices. I skimmed the cream off of our raw milk and I made the butter from some of the cream. We pick our milk up from the Wednesday farmers’ market, so I figured it was the next best thing to actually purchasing it at the market where the "cook-off" was held.

The competition started, yada, yada, yada...

Chopping peaches

The He*th*rs in action

There was quite the crowd
at the market that day!

Plating my creation

Handing over my masterpiece for judgement

...she won.

After the judges tasted my creation and moved onto Heather’s, the crowd became a flock of vultures, devouring what was left, so at least I know their taste buds were working!

The vultures moving in

Teresa Farney from the Gazette asks
questions as we clean up our messes

Without further ado, here is the recipe for my not-so-award-winning…

Cardamom French Toast with Lavender-Peach Honey

Serves 4

Photo by Kathya Ethington

2 large ripe peaches, pitted
1 cup raw unfiltered honey, local if possible
1 1/2 teaspoons dried lavender
4 large farm-fresh eggs
1/4 cup cream, raw if possible *
1/2 to 1 teaspoon ground cardamom
8 to 12 slices of sturdy bread (I used ciabatta), cut 3/4-inch thick
2 tablespoons butter plus additional for buttering toast (homemade is best but not required)
Whipped cream, homemade from raw cream if possible *

* Note: Raw milk is not legal in all states... don't even get me started.

1. Cut one peach into large chunks and thinly slice the other; set aside the slices.

2. Purée the peach chunks in a food processor and combine with the honey and lavender in a medium saucepan. Place over medium-low to medium heat and simmer while preparing the toast.

3. Combine the eggs, cream and cardamom in a flat shallow dish and whisk until well mixed.

4. Working in batches if necessary, melt butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Dip bread slices into egg mixture and coat well on both sides. Place into the skillet and cook until first side is golden-brown.

5. While toast is cooking, strain the honey mixture through a fine mesh sieve into a medium bowl. Discard the remaining solids, add reserved peach slices to the honey and stir to coat.

6. Flip bread and cook until second side is golden brown. Remove from skillet and plate.

7. Butter French toast slices, then top with honey and peaches. Finish with a dollop of whipped cream.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jon: Ahhhhh, big fat pieces of French toast with a peachy topping and fresh whipped cream on a cool September morning at the farmer’s market. What could be more satisfying? For the audience of the chef challenge, apparently nothing. You should have seen the crowd swarm like vultures on those breakfast plates. The toast never stood a chance.

The best thing about this whole deal for me was the practice round. A few days before the contest, Hethyr tried out the recipe on me. As I stuffed my gullet with a mountain of French toast with that luscious peach sauce, I knew that it was a recipe that would beat the crap out of anything the opponent was making. And it sure did. This stuff was amazing, and even more incredible that it was made with fresh, local ingredients.

So don’t worry, it always appears at first as if the Dark Side has been defeated… but I think we’ve all seen enough Star Wars movies and Futurama episodes to know better. The mug knows best…

Dueling Chef Challenge and Local Food Week

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 21:07:00 +0000

It's Local Food Week from September 17th through September 25th and I'm helping to kick off events by participating in a farmers' market shopping and cooking challenge this coming Saturday (9/17/11) beginning at 9:30am at the Colorado Farm and Art Market which takes place at The Margarita at Pine Creek. I'll be taking on Chef Heather from Change Personal Chef Service... Hethyr vs. Heather! Jon and I get a kick out of this for several reasons. The similarities/differences don't end with our profession and names. We're both pretty tiny and around the same age. I have dark curly hair and she has blond curly hair. I have a black chef coat, she has a white chef coat. Sort of reminds me of the concept of yin yang. Or the movie Black Swan... MWAHAHAHA! ;)

Chef Hethyr Pletsch of
Everyday Gourmet Colorado

Chef Heather Mitchell of
Change Personal Chef Service

VS.

I'm sure we'd both appreciate all of the support we can get, but since you're a reader of my blog, please come out and cheer on the Dark Side!!!

What: Dueling Chef Challenge with Chef Hethyr of Everyday Gourmet Colorado and Chef Heather of Change Personal Chef Service
When: Saturday, September 17th at 9:30am
Where: Colorado Farm and Art Market at The Margarita at Pine Creek, 7350 Pine Creek Rd., Colorado Springs (map)

And don't forget to check out the other Local Food Week events taking place in Colorado Springs!

Local Food Week Events Calendar

Hanging in Boulder, Another Year Older

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 03:49:00 +0000

Hethyr: If you’ve read the last couple of posts, you’ll know that I’m currently on an elimination diet to heal my gut. I had another appointment with Dr. Restricto last week and was told that I need to be on this diet for at least another month and then we’ll reassess to see if I’m ready to add certain foods back. I was pretty bummed to hear that but I know it’s all for a good reason and if it makes me feel better in the long run, then it’s worth it. HOWEVER, I have a birthday coming up this week… How old am I going to be, you ask? Don’t you know it’s not polite to ask a lady (or young girl, in my case) her age? As some country song by someone I’ve never heard of says “I’m old enough to know better but I’m still too young to care.”

Since my birthday is right around Labor Day (and sometimes actually falls on Labor Day), I often get the three day weekend to celebrate. This year, Jon has a school function on my actual birthday, so we decided to celebrate early this weekend. I made sure to ask Dr. Restricto if I could do a little cheating and she said “Yes! Eat whatever you want – it’s your birthday.” I knew that I didn’t want to go completely overboard or I’d feel like crap, but there are a couple of things that I’ve been missing terribly. So…

I decided on my perfect day. We got up without an alarm, I did yoga and then we headed up to Boulder to hang out for the day. We started with a trip to the famous Saturday farmers’ market.

It's the biggest one I've ever seen!

I was pretty much set on a good loaf of bread, some kind of savory jam or spread (we ended up with two different types of olive tapenade), some good cheese and some heirloom tomatoes for lunch, so we set out with intention. We found everything we needed and some extra items for good measure. We brought home some extra cheese, sweet corn and olive tapenade.

Searching for the perfect
organic produce

Where we eventually bought
our tomatoes

A plethora of pretty, pretty produce

With our market booty, we headed to Boulder Creek for a picnic. We found a nice little spot by the creek’s edge and laid out our feast. The weather could not have been more perfect – mid-70s and sunny with a tiny bit of a breeze. Some people were floating down the crystal clear creek in tubes, some were wading around and many (like us) were just lazing near the water’s edge soaking up rays and enjoying the beautiful day.

Boulder Creek on a perfect day

Crusty bread with Camembert, olive and red pepper
tapenade and a gorgeous heirloom tomato

Me with my mouth full

The ducks wanted in on the feast

Drinking wine out of plastic cups
by Boulder Creek - that's class.

After lunch, we headed to Pearl Street for a little vintage shopping before dinner. Although the vintage shops seem to carry mostly 80s clothing and nothing we were really into (are we seriously THAT old?!?!), we had fun poking around and laughing at some of the tackier items.

At around 5pm, we walked to the restaurant where we wanted to have dinner to check it out and see if we could get reservations (we were told on the phone that they only took reservations for parties of six or more). Apparently, they do take reservations but they were full for the whole night. The hostess said for the best chance of getting a table, we should probably come back in about 20 minutes - yep, 5:20pm. Well, we really, really wanted to eat at Salt the Bistro so we made a quick trip to one more vintage store and then headed back. We were able to get a table outside and decided to have a drink before ordering anything so we might be a little hungrier when we actually made our order. Jon had one of our favorite local milk stouts from Left Hand Brewing Company and I had a local gluten-free beer from New Planet. See? I tried to be a little bit good.

Finally we decided on an appetizer of crusty bread topped with shiitake and matsutake mushrooms from local Hazel Dell Mushrooms and some kind of buttery white sauce, drizzled with truffle oil. Of course we never remember to take pictures before digging in, so you’ll probably notice some bites missing…

We knew we wanted to order dessert, so decided against salad/soup and first course and went straight for the entrées. Jon had a beautiful salmon dish and I opted for the local grilled pork chop with crispy polenta, local green beans and a grilled Colorado peach. The pork chop was one of the tastiest I’ve ever eaten in my life (it was brined before cooking) and unlike most gourmet restaurants, the portion was so large that I brought home half for lunch today. Amazingly, this is the dish that I really wanted above anything else on the menu and everything was within my dietary guidelines. See? I was good without intention, even!

But then there was dessert. >=) Dark Chocolate Hazelnut Cake. Oh yeah. The description per Salt’s website is “black onyx chocolate cake with hazelnut butter & housemade Earl Grey ice cream.” It was devilishly good.

Half-eaten Dark Chocolate Hazelnut Cake

On the way home, Jon and I laughed about how much my idea of a perfect day has changed in the 14 years we’ve been together and about the fact that we’d probably end up in bed by 10pm. Here’s to getting old! And here’s my recipe for my perfect birthday…

Perfect Birthday

1 hour of yoga

1 cup of coffee for hubby and 1 cup of tea for wifey

1 hour at the enormous and awesome Boulder farmers’ market resulting in:

1 good loaf of crusty bread from local Udi’s bakery

1 wheel of Camembert cheese from local MouCo Cheese Company

1 jar of olive tapenade and 1 jar of olive and red pepper tapenade from

local Loredana’s Pesto

2 ripe organic heirloom tomatoes from local Cure Organic Farm

2 ripe organic peaches for dessert from western slope Ela Family Farms

6 ears of organic peaches & cream sweet corn to take home

1 wedge of raw milk cheddar-style cheese and 1 wedge of Buckhorn cheese

from local Windsor Dairy

2 hours of lounging by Boulder Creek eating lunch and drinking wine

2 hours of vintage shopping and people-watching on Pearl Street

3 hours of fabulousness at Salt the Bistro for dinner and drinks

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Jon: Boulder is such an amazing place. It’s one of those distinctive, uncommon towns where you can have a profoundly entertaining day doing nothing more than walking, sitting and eating. The creekside picnic with fresh, local bread, cheese, fruits and veggies—and red wine to wash it down—was about as fun and relaxing as it gets.

But the thing that makes Boulder Boulder is the people. Sure, there are thousands of college kids with every kind of style (and lack of style) imaginable. But the locals provide the truest entertainment. Whether it’s the dreadlocked African-mask wearing drummer, or the fire juggling clown, or the mysterious guy who walks around town in extremely slow motion, you don’t need to look any further than the streets and sidewalks for amusement. My favorite peculiarity of the day came in front of a music stage where a roller-skating dancer was putting on a performance that would almost certainly make a Las Vegas showgirl blush.

Although there were only eight entrées on the menu at Salt, after thirty minutes I had managed to merely whittle my choices down to six. I decided that I would revert to the “panic order” decision that comes when the server is standing and waiting with pen and paper in hand. Since she had proven to be friendly and helpful, I went ahead and asked our waitress for her input on my dilemma. As she was describing all the potential pros and cons of each option, Hethyr brought up the very astute point that perhaps I should stay away from the Pan Roasted Wild Alaskan Salmon because it was not caught locally. The server mentioned that it wasn’t all that far away—it was just from up there in Alaska. I bit my tongue and refrained from pointing out that Alaska was actually 3000 miles away from our current location. I suppose that both Alaska and Colorado are mountainous, snowy, and a part of North America, so I could see where ~~Sarah Palin~~ one could get confused. Anyway, the point of the story is that I ordered the salmon.

I can see Alaska from here!

Sorry fellow foodies, I promise I’ll eat an extra Colorado peach today as my penance. Don’t forget to wish Hethyr a happy birthday on the 7^th!

Take Another Little Peach of my Heart

noreply@blogger.com (Hethyr and Jon) — Sun, 28 Aug 2011 01:03:00 +0000

Hethyr: What child didn’t, at one time or another, read a book by Roald Dahl? Remember Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Two others that were favorites when I was a kid were Matilda and The Witches. And who could forget about James and the Giant Peach? Although it has been a number of years (to say the least) since I have read it, I remember that James finds a tunnel leading into the peach, where he meets a bunch of insects who befriend him and they take him on a magical journey. Even as an adult, I’d like to climb inside of a giant peach and go on cool adventures… although I could do without the bugs.

Well, if there was ever a chance of something like that happening, it would most likely happen around this time of year in Colorado. Peaches, peaches, everywhere. It’s awesome.

Peaches don’t last very long at all in our house, so it’s a wonder that I actually did something with a peach other than eating it straight. We had this amazing swordfish steak (MSC certified, of course) the other night and I was having trouble coming up with a way to serve it. Jon wanted to grill it, which was perfectly fine with me, but it needed some pizazz. Did I seriously just use the word pizazz? What the hell is wrong with me? Must be lack of dairy, sugar and, as my cousin just mentioned, Nutella. Anyway, I decided to make a peach Pico de Gallo since we had a few peaches on hand.

No large resorts (or other people!) on this beach

I’ve always been a fan of fruit with seafood, so it seemed like a perfect fit. However, before I give you the recipe for the Pico de Gallo, I'm reminded of another fruit/seafood story…

When we were in Costa Rica a few years ago, we decided that we’d spend our last week there in Puerto Viejo, a tiny beach town on the Caribbean coast near the Panama border. There are no large hotels or resorts in this town. It’s one of the few places that had not yet been subjected to globalization. The first day when we arrived, a woman who worked at the small hotel where we stayed asked if she could catch a ride into town with us. We were a few miles outside of the town proper and she didn’t have a car, so we were happy to take her with us since we needed to get some food anyway.

The restaurant where we had
lunch on our first day
in Puerto Viejo

When we got to town, we went our separate ways, but we ended up seeing her again as we were having lunch at a bar table facing the ocean. She was in an animated conversation with a local fisherman who was trying to sell her live lobsters and she was upset because he wouldn’t sell her just one - she had to buy two or he wouldn’t sell her any at all. She obviously didn’t need both, so we chimed in to see if we could help by offering to go in on the lobsters with her. She loved the idea and even suggested that we have dinner together at the hotel. I offered to make a pineapple-mango Pico de Gallo to go with it if I could borrow a cutting board and knife once we got back. We all agreed on the plan and went our separate ways again as she was going to catch a ride back on a friend’s bicycle. Since she didn’t want to take the lobsters back on the bike, she asked if we’d take them back in the car. We said sure. Little did we know that the lobsters had been on ice and were lethargic when we got them. No wonder she wanted us to take them.

I could have been eaten alive by this thing

When we got back in the car, I set the bag containing the crustaceans on the floor by my feet without really thinking about it. As we were riding along and talking, one of the little buggers decided to make a sudden huge leap. Thanks goodness he didn’t decide to latch onto my leg with his giant claws. I completely freaked out and jumped a mile in the air, landing back in my seat, feet and all. For the rest of the ride, I would not put my feet back on the floor or take my eyes off of those sketchy little f@#$ers. Jon laughed so hard, he nearly peed himself.

So, although that had nothing to do with peaches, I thought you’d get a small chuckle out of it. And now that I made you suffer through that stupid story that didn’t have a point, I’ll be nice by giving you the recipe for the pineapple-mango Pico de Gallo as well.

Peach (or Nectarine) Pico de Gallo

Makes about 1 cup

1 large peach (or nectarine), pitted and diced
1 large shallot, minced
1 medium jalapeño, seeded, ribbed and minced (a lot of the heat lies in the ribs and seeds, so keep ‘em if you want it super-spicy)
1-inch gingerroot piece, peeled and minced
1 tablespoon fresh cilantro, chopped
1/2 tablespoon lime juice
Salt and pepper, to taste

1. In a medium bowl, mix together all ingredients.

2. Refrigerate for a couple of hours, if desired, to allow flavors to meld. Serve over chicken, pork, seafood, with tortilla chips, as a topping for tacos, etc.

Pineapple-Mango Pico de Gallo

Makes about 3 cups

1 cup pineapple, diced (fresh or canned… if canned, drain first)
1 mango, peeled, pitted and diced
1/2 medium red bell pepper
1/2 medium green bell pepper
1/2 medium red onion, diced
1 teaspoon garlic, finely minced or turned into garlic paste
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
1 large jalapeño, seed, ribbed and minced
Salt and pepper

1. In a medium bowl, mix together all ingredients.

2. Refrigerate for a couple of hours, if desired, to allow flavors to meld. Serve over chicken, pork, seafood, with tortilla chips, as a topping for tacos, etc.

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Jon: Reading about the days in Costa Rica definitely puts me in a nostalgic mood. There was nothing quite as calming and purifying to the soul as opening the front doors of Casa Mariposa, feeling the cool, humid, jungle air, looking out over the lush green vegetation toward the blue waters of Lago Arenal or toward the smoky, ash-filled burps of Volcán Arenal, relaxing in a rocking chair, sipping a dark-roasted local Costa Rican coffee… and making a daily to-do list that included feeding and watering the dog, cats, and goats, picking the cabbage or whatever other vegetables were ready, trading the cabbage with the neighbors for eggs, milk, or chocolate, and usually some random project like figuring out a way to displace the hundreds of black wasps that had taken up residence in the rancho. Ah, those were the days.

It was actually during our time at Casa Mariposa that we learned a lot about self-sufficiency. I guess that is bound to happen when you live a couple miles outside of a tiny little town with nothing but an ATV to ride. That was also our initial introduction to composting, which we now do at our own house to a ridiculous degree. Even our dog, Garr, seemed to enjoy his time en la jungla, as he had the mother of all bug buffets on which to feast. It was more than a little unnerving to us that some of the bugs were big and mean enough to fight back, but Garr had no such fear.

So I hope you’re somewhere in the world where you can find some fresh peaches or pineapples to make some of Hethyr’s pico de gallo. And in case any of you ever wondered how a pineapple grows, below is a video I took several years ago at Casa Mariposa (yep, there was a pineapple garden, too). I’ll also put a video clip of the regular garden below that. And if you really want to stalk us, check out our blog from when Hethyr, Garr, and I were temporary Ticos…

Link to our Costa Rica Blog