dickdog / mozpockets

mozpockets (#4): utility

dickdog — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 04:53:00 +0000

“Is mozpockets not an exercise in dwelling on the past, even preventative from getting over this, getting on with your life?” a kindly stranger asked. “Yes,” I said, “perhaps, but it’s not everyday I get to channel my unhealthy obsessions into a quasi-art practice. Or is it? I’m having fun anyway.” The stranger then tastes my bicycle chain.

mozpockets (#3): the stages (1-3)

dickdog — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 04:03:06 +0000

1) Denial. Last week we were sitting in bed. He was fickle and changeable. Easily influenced. “Yes, I am Blind, No, I can’t see.”

2) Anger. Today was the most beautiful day in 4 months. “Oh Winter Push on, Winter is so long, Winter moves on.” I took so many strange pills that were Advil.

winter’s crutch is dropped.

3) Bargaining. “And you’re always busy, really busy, busy busy, hairdresser on fire.”

mozpockets (#2): the essential discipline

dickdog — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 15:32:03 +0000

My grief is shifted by the news of Corey Haim’s passing. I am surprised, alarmed by my fickle heart. Lost Boys was a fine film. I remember this. Reflect. In a mozpocket this is only bullshit. “Fuck that wastoid,” says he. “I likes Feldman better. You’re the one for me fatty!”

I am washing dishes. I am putting the key in the lock. I in bed not yet asleep, asleep, asleep, asleep.

mozpockets (#1!!!): the soundtrack of our lives

dickdog — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 10:02:10 +0000

after dickdog broke the news to me that he was leaving i got in the car and decided the first song on the radio had portent. it was joe walsh. fuck. that was followed up by new order. double fuck with a side of weeps. the first mozpocket enveloped that shit as soon as i walked in the house:

remember where you were

dickdog presents (#100): whisper, not a bang (aka whale of a good time)

dickdog — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 07:43:01 +0000

on the occasion of our hundredth post, we have some sad news to impart: dickdog will be leaving us. his return is uncertain. we will be taking some time to collect ourselves to deal with this loss and and subsequently will not be posting for a while. we will be back, though we don’t know when. perhaps he will return too. in either event, we are confident we will come back even stronger. it’s been real.

UPDATE 3/10: grief is antiseptic. we’re back. welcome mozpockets!!!!!

dickdog presents (#99): childhood

dickdog — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 02:16:48 +0000

my get out of jail free card

dickdog presents: random diagrams

dickdog — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 08:43:13 +0000

dickdog presents: slumber party

dickdog — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 14:34:35 +0000

dickdog presents: we’re a happy family

dickdog — Mon, 01 Mar 2010 08:04:54 +0000

sitting in queens, eating refried beans…

dickdog presents terrorist mugshots: marwan canucki

dickdog — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 08:03:00 +0000

Now this fuckin’ guy. Geez. You’ve heard that al-Qaeda’s trying to come up from Mexico and EXPLODE our freedoms and liberties, right? Gettin’ visas and the like from that commie prick down there in Venezuela, Dirty Sanchez or somebody, right? Well shit if that ain’t just the tip a the ol’ godbedamned iceberg. They’s coming in from the north too! Wearing costumes! Them scruffy bastards already look half lumberjacky anyway! Fuck if it ain’t the truth. And Here’s me thinking that hot number Sara had our rear flank. You just can’t trust a woman to do nothing, no way! Listen up now boyo and listen good. Yer life may be depending on this shit, and not just that but the FREEDOM of our fucking NATION!!! U-S-A! U-S-A! If you spot one of these pricks, there’s like a secret method of uncovery: there’s one way to tell ‘em apart from them faggot Canadians. Just one. This right here is it. They got yellow eyes like SATAN. Uh huh. Now go get em! YEEHAW!!!