Ahmad Babar (. aB .)

crowds

2012-04-08T03:21:00.002+05:00

somehow I still keep searching for you in crowds unknown
hoping for a glimpse, craving a look back...

What if I die?

2012-03-07T23:25:00.000+05:00

What if I die? (by Ahmad Babar):
As I walk down this road
I wonder what would happen if I die?
Will anyone remember me?
Will anyone even cry?
How will I be remembered?
How will they take my name?
Will I be praised?
Or will I be deprived of the dead man's fame?
So what will happen?
What will happen if I die?
Will I end up in Hell?
Or towards Heaven my soul will fly?
I wonder about these questions
I am amazed at my life
I don't know what to do now
I just sit playing with the knife
What will happen if I live?
Or would it be different if I die?
Will they miss me?
Or will they jump with joy?
Will I be given a proper funeral?
Or to the vultures I will be fed?
Will they come pay their respects?
Or will I be left on a thorny bed?
Answers I don't want
To these queries
All I really want
Is to leave behind some pleasant memories
But there's one thing that I want
That when I actually die
I want you there by my side
And I want to hear from you my final lullaby

Wrong set of arms

2012-02-21T07:21:00.002+05:00

20-02-2012
Wrong set of arms (by Ahmad Babar):
And when you'll find yourself lying alone at night
You'll remember how I made your life so bright
And when you'll wake up in the wrong set of arms
You'll remember how I filled your life with warmth
Then you'll wonder why you let go
Why you quit before the end of the show
You'll come searching for me
But I'll be no where to see
I would've moved on from you & me
Far, far away into the deep, deep sea
Don't call out my name, I won't answer back
It took too long to mend this heartache
Shed a tear though, for that which you lost
Shed a tear for me, for us, for you & me
Go back to your decision, go back to his arms
Leave me to my sea, leave me with my qualms

Parody of James Blunt's You're Beautiful

2012-02-04T14:06:00.001+05:00

wrote this back in 2007...

You are Beautiful – Parody (by Ahmad Babar):

My life is screwed

There’s no cure

I am a loser

Of that I am sure

I saw you on a subway

You were trying to open a can

I had no hope

And I don’t have a plan

You are beautiful, you are beautiful

You are beautiful, it’s true

I saw your face

In a crowded place

I had to run off to the loo

To do number two

She saw my open fly

As I walked on by

She could see from my face

That I was about to cry

And I am too embarrassed to see her again

And I am praying for all of this to end

You are beautiful, you are beautiful

You are beautiful, it’s true

I saw your face

In a crowded place

I had to run off to the loo

To do number two

Lala la la, lala la la laaa

You are beautiful, you are beautiful

You are beautiful, it’s true

There must be a devil

With a cunning face

And I again had to run to the loo

But it’s time to face the truth

I love to do number two

Moments

2012-02-03T20:48:00.000+05:00

03-02-2012
Moments (by Ahmad Babar)
I've all of the answers
just ask the right questions
I've tears waiting to flow
waiting for the right emotions
This rainy night doesn't feel the same
Like it did with you
My soul is so weightless now
It keeps dying without you
Some moments last forever
I keep searching for them
Moments of truth & bliss
From which love stems
Hold my hand as I stumble
For I'll stumble for sure
I don't want another fall
For falls feel so sore
My body is bruised enough
And heart is torn beyond repair
But maybe you have that solution
That I couldn't find anywhere
So I'll wait for as long as it takes
To find those moments that I crave
Save me from this sea of pain
Before it swallows me wave by wave

Green

2011-12-13T09:33:00.000+05:00

13-12-2011
Green (by Ahmad Babar):
I hurt some people
I let others go
I knew I could’ve had hung on
Till the end of the show
But what’s the point
When there’s no way to go
Away from all that hurts
And life’s getting too slow
I kick the dust on the beach
I stay away from the water
The waves remind me of the moment
When my heart began to shatter
I dig my feet deep into the sand
Look at the kids playing around
Their smiles take me back
To the moment when we began
Began our journey
Just you and me
It’s no longer the same
The sea’s blue but all I see is green
All I see is green, you and me
Washed away into the sea

Fighting Love

2011-12-05T08:02:00.000+05:00

This is an old one...

Fighting love (by Ahmad Babar):
I realized it too late
I had myself closed the gates
I was crying in the rain
Fighting all of this pain
Now I know I was wrong
This is not where I belong
I see their faces in my eyes
I close my ears to their lies
It is something, something so sweet
She and I will never meet
I try to stop this pain
I am fighting love again

My heart doesn't want to let go
My mind craves for the end of the show
It was something, it was you
It was something, it was new
There was a pleasure in all this pain
That I felt in my veins
There is no one around
I lay alone on the ground
I get drenched in the rain
I am fighting love again

Now stop what you are doing
Now stop pretending
I hate you, I hate you more
You have turned me so sore
I gave you all that I had
Where we are is all so sad
Now I don't love you like I used to
Hating you is now all that I do
Still somehow the heart feels pain
I am fighting love again

The moments

2011-11-01T04:41:00.003+05:00

01/11/2011
The Moments (by Ahmad Babar):
Its too early to be over
It’s a little too late to be something
So I sit here by the sea shore
I think of you, I think of us and I sing
About all that could be
About all that was and still is
The longing look in your eyes
Reminds me of the moment when we first kissed
I remember the first time I saw you
And the moment you heard my name
I wonder, if I will ever
Find a feeling that is the same
Same as the moment, the very moment
When my hand brushed your hair
And I don’t know why
Why you still seem to be so near
Don’t go, please don’t let go
I beg of you to stay
And I swear, I promise
This time we will do it your way

Pakistan

2011-06-14T16:10:00.000+05:00

Pakistan (by Ahmad Babar):
As I woke up today I looked around
I thought of the land that I stand on
I look at the Heavens and thank God
For this land, the land where I belong
It’s a country called Pakistan
A land which is my life
A land which is more than a dream
A land for which I shall always strive
Expressing your love for your country isn't easy
We all feel it at some level whether we like it or not
All it takes is a little heart
To thank all those who have ever fought
It’s a dream of mine to serve this country
To follow in the foot steps of the Quaid
To do something a little extraordinary
To die knowing that I at least tried
I am sitting and scratching my head
Wondering what I should write
This is a humble attempt
I wish I can make all the wrongs right
I know my country has been through a lot
And so have been I
It has managed to survive so far
And so will I
Today I make a promise to this land
That forever it I shall serve
If need be for it I will die
After all it’s the land I love

Shoaib Akhtar: the Soaring Eagle

2011-04-05T16:39:00.002+05:00

From being the man who silenced the Eden Gardens when he bowled Tendulkar out on the first ball he ever bowled to him to being the person who had every soul in Eden Gardens screaming his name as he tore up the opposition in his first match for Kolkata Kinghtriders, Shoaib Akhtar was the man we all loved to hate.

We loved him when he roared in and blew the oppositions away, one after the other; we adored him when he beat Bret Lee to become the first and the only person in history to breach the 100 mph barrier; we were awestruck when he got Dravid and Tendulkar in consecutive balls; we ran around our living rooms imitating the soaring eagle every time he got a wicket; we defended him in front of his critics; our hearts sank whenever he would fall injured; we doubted him when he didn’t meet our expectations; we hardly ever gave him a chance to explain; yet we all loved him! Irrespective of whether we had opposed or supported his selection, we couldn’t help but pump our fists every time he got a wicket, every time he hit a batsman on their head and every time he glared into their eyes after making them fall on the ground. We all loved Shoaib Akhtar.

Shoaib Akhtar was a success story. A flat foot boy who unlike 99% of the country only started to play cricket in his teens, who fought his way through allegations of chucking and drugs; he showed us what patriotism and passion for the green jersey means. Shoaib Akhtar had a story to tell every time he steamed in to bowl. The script was written by his fingers controlling the direction of the ball, the direction came from his buzzing cricketing mind, the drama came with his slower balls, the action with his jaw breaking bouncers, and the romance? the romance came with middle stumps flying all over town.

The number 14 shall forever be etched in our memories, not because cricketing legends like Ponting wore it on their shirts, but because of the soaring eagle that Shoaib Akhtar was. The sight of the number 14 blazing towards the bowling crease with the crowd cheering it on was and always will be one of the most beautiful sights in world cricket. It may not be as elegant as Imran Khan’s run in or as clever as Wasim Akram’s but it was menacing, it struck fear in the heart of the oppositions’ batsmen, those who had the misfortune of facing him and those who were waiting in the dressing room, praying they don’t get to face him.

A lot has been said about how Shoaib fought through his injuries over time and how passionate he was about the game and all of it is true. Even in his last tournament he had a vital role to play in getting Pakistan through to the knock out stages. It is extremely unfortunate that his last over ever in International cricket will be the one he bowled to Ross Taylor; but it can’t take away from us any of the memories he has left us with. From his unstoppable performances during the 1999 world cup to bowling Mahela out with a beauty of a delivery in the 2011 world cup; from the 100mph+ (161.3kmph) ball as a 28 year old during the 2003 world cup to scintillating pace, including a delivery bowled at over 159kmph during the 2011 world cup; from his toe crushing Yorkers to his intelligently bowled slower deliveries; Shoaib Akhtar created magic and we couldn’t help but be in his awe.

Not just as a Pakistani cricket fan, but as a cricket fan in general, it is my wish to see Shoaib in action in his own country one last time. I appeal to the PCB to give him a farewell match. Make it Akhtar XI VS Afridi XI, invite players from Pakistan and players from abroad. Shoaib has made some great friends in other teams, both current and retired players, and I’m sure they will love to come play in his farewell match. Invite Brian Lara, Shoaib has always regretted that he only got to bowl 3 deliveries to him; give Shoaib the best farewell gift he can get, let him bowl to Lara one final time.

Not only will this match serve as a farewell match for Shoaib, but it will also pave way for the return of International Cricket to Pakistan. And above all, we will all get to see the soaring eagle again.

Let’s hope we get to cheer his name as he soars in one last time.

Ahmad Babar
A Pakistani Cricket Fan
http://twitter.com/ahmadbabar

Words

2010-11-18T23:34:00.002+05:00

17/12/2009
Words (by Ahmad Babar):
I have never felt this lonely before
Its like every cell in my body's gone sore
Even the broken paint on the ceiling
doesn't attract me anymore
I have lost my ability to envision
I have lost my ability to write
A piece of this puzzle has gone missing
And I am slowly losing my sight
Nothing now seems like it used to
The pleasure in pain is now gone
These words are losing their meaning
Turns out I was the one who was always in the wrong
Truth seems to have disappeared
Broken promises are all that remain
Nothing seems to be permanent
But it all happens over and over again
I lay alone in my bed
In the late hours of the night
The words still don't have a meaning
I am counting down seconds to my final flight

My angel

2010-11-18T23:32:00.000+05:00

17-10-2010
My angel (by Ahmad Babar):
I like the way you move your feet
A small step at a time
I love the way you say
My name every time
I love how you feel
When my arms are wrapped around you
That sweet smile melts my heart
Every time that I hold you
I love how you can say so much
Without having to utter a word
I love how you wrap your fingers around mine
Makes me feel like I'm king of the world
I'll protect you, I'll guide you
I'll be there, I'll always care
I promise you I'll never leave your side
Whenever you will be down, you'll find me there
You are my angel, my sweet little angel
I'm your baba, I'm proud to be your father
You are God's Greatest Gift
I love you my sweet little daughter
I'll be your best friend
I'll be your shoulder
I'll keep you warm
When life starts to get colder
I will always love you
You can always count on me
I won't ever let you down
You can always trust me
You are my angel, my sweet little angel
I'm your baba, I'm proud to be your father
You are God's Greatest Gift
I love you my sweet little daughter

Rainbow (incomplete)

2010-11-18T23:31:00.002+05:00

Started on 11/10/10

Rainbow (by Ahmad Babar):

You are prettier than a 6am rainbow

Saw you and couldn't even say hello

Dumb founded, I was lost for words

Wish I could turn time backwards

Life's all black & white without you

Now if only you knew

Dilemma

2010-09-18T18:48:00.000+05:00

Kindly excuse the rustiness, been a long while since I last wrote anything...

17-09-2010
Dilemma (by Ahmad Babar):
Just as it starts to seem that the dust is about to settle
Life takes another turn and pushes me towards a new battle
This is not what I came here for
This is not what I bargained
My life's been a slow demise
I wonder what I've gained
It doesn't seem like a lot
Its starting to look like I've lost
I could maybe change my path
But I wonder how much more will it cost?
I no longer have the strength for another setback
Maybe I shouldn't have left when I had it all
Greed's the Devil's child
It makes all of us fall
But, I never learnt to give up
I don't know how to say goodbye
Whichever path I choose now
I promise you won't ever see me cry

On the facebook issue!

2010-05-20T10:53:00.001+05:00

Before I begin, I want to clarify that not only am I a Muslim but I am a proud Muslim and dearly love our Prophet Muhammad (SAW) and can go to any extent to protect his Honor. But I want to use his teachings for doing so. Being a Muslim, being an intelligent Muslim, I am gravely ashamed by the actions of certain decision makers in Pakistan! I agree that the competition being held ON Facebook (NOT BY Facebook) to draw caricatures of our beloved Prophet (SAW) is gruesomely wrong but is the measure we are taking to register our protest “right”? Hazarat Muhammad (SAW) is the person who even went and looked after the woman who used to throw garbage at him every single day! No, I am not saying that we need to start looking after those who are conducting this competition, all I am saying is that there are better ways of tackling the issue than going for a boycott/complete blackout of Facebook

What we need to realize is that almost half of members of the page on which this competition was being held comprised of a group of both Muslims and Non-Muslims condemning their actions!!! And simultaneously various groups of Muslims started pages in Honor of our Beloved Prophet (SAW) where they had declared 20th May as the Honor the Prophet (SAW) Day and were supposed to post their favorite Hadiths and let the world know of the greatness of Prophet Muhammad (SAW), which I believe is the right way to counter any attempts by the infidels at attacking Islam and the Prophet (SAW). But with a ban on access to Facebook, Muslims from Pakistan, who were leading the “good” pages on Facebook are unable to gain access to them and can only sit and wonder what is to be done!

What disturbs me is that the PTA have gone for another “quick fix” by not only blocking access to Facebook but also by stopping all BlackBerry services in order to “ensure” that no one gains access to Facebook without realizing that it has also stopped users’ access to their emails and other useful applications. And all of this is setting the wrong precedent. Instead of taking care of other major issues such as pornography, including websites which continue to post leaked pictures of Pakistani girls on a regular basis, and blocking and taking action against these websites, the PTA is going for “quick fixes” and is effectively stopping a productive counter movement to the infidel’s competition. Yes, Facebook probably should take measures to close down that page but why are we sitting here hoping for them to do something when we can do better on our own using the very same platform as them?
I hope that the above makes some sense. May Allah Guide us all!

Ahmad B

Prison of Glass

2009-10-26T00:39:00.001+06:00

27-01-08
Prison of Glass (by Ahmad Babar):
Looking out through the walls
Of this prison of glass
Scratching my fingers at sand and stone
Hoping to one day walk on grass
Grass that I see everyday
So lush and green on the other side
My shoulder are sore from trying to break these walls
But still I am trapped inside
There is a puddle of my tears in the corner
Every drop had dried out my eyes
Through the roof I see birds hovering
I wish I could fly with them above the skies
I try to shade my face with my arm
To not let it be burnt more by the blazing sun
I go sit back in my corner
Trying not to become
Not to become one of them
Neither to become what I once was
For if I do become
I will lose even what I haven't lost

January

2009-10-26T00:37:00.002+06:00

01/01/2008
January (by Ahmad Babar):
The summer has long past
I don't think I can last
Today I feel so insecure
My broken heart longs for more
My dried up eyes are longing for sleep
My empty hands want someone to keep
Someone to hold onto
Someone who is somehow like you
Your smell is still in this air
And your memories continue to prevail
The pain is increasing everyday
If only someone could heal it in your way
This January cold is penetrating my bones
My feet tread over the ruins of our home
The sun is hidden and even the snow isn't falling
With the cold breeze I can hear you calling
I am still here like I used to be
Will be waiting for you to come find me

If Only

2009-10-17T00:34:00.002+06:00

16/10/2009
If Only (by Ahmad Babar):
If only it was a 2 hour show
It would be so easy to let go
If only she knew how I had felt
At the moment she left
If only she missed me too
We could start over anew
If only there was no 'if only'
I wouldn't be so lonely

If only I could bring her back
And make up for the things I lack
If only I knew how to mend
She may not need to pretend
If only she knew how to love
I could try to rise above
If only no one said 'if only'
No one would ever feel this lonely

If only there were no goodbye's
Then maybe we won't have to cry
If only she also cared
I wouldn't be this scared
If only she held my hand
Maybe this wouldn't have been our end
If only she didn't make me say 'if only'
I wouldn't be this lonely
If only...

Paris

2009-10-07T20:23:00.001+06:00

12/09/2009
Paris (by Ahmad Babar):
I am sitting in Paris
My mind's going astray
I don't think I am lost
But still I can't find my way
I long to get back home
But its a long way away
From the top of the Eiffel Tower
I watch the world sway
Each one to his own music
Each one to her own beat
And I watch them fool eachother
From the best possible seat
There's something really funny about
All of this seriousness
They all pretend they are in paradise
While they are really in a mess
In the fashion capital of the world
In the most romantic city
There is not a single soul with a heart
What a pity
The wind starts to blow
The stars come out onto the sky
As the night draws in
I try to search for a butterfly
A friend once told me
About one up in the sky
Formed by the stars
One that fills you up with joy
As the lights below come on
I commence my descent
Step by step I return to the world
Where one and all pretend
I hope I won't get engulfed
Or let myself be swept away
There's way too much pain in Paris
To tempt me to stay
I set on my way home
On my longest journey
In hope to get back
In hope to rediscover 'me'

Jhoot

2009-10-07T20:22:00.000+06:00

21/09/2009
Jhoot (by Ahmad Babar):
Kaho kay kabhi na jao gi
Aur agar gai tau laut aao gi
Kaho kay tum sirf meri he hau
Saath dau gi chahye jau bhi hau
Mujh say tum sach na khena kabhi
Houn mein bus kush yunhi

Jhoot ki ab aadat si hai
Sach say ik nafrat si hai
Mujh say jhoot tum hamesha bolna
Sach keh kar dil na mera torna
Kaho mujh say kay sab theek hai
Theek hai yahan sab theek hai

Karoun ga mein tera intezaar
Bus laut aao aik baar
Jau chaho gi karoun ga mein
Khud say bhi laroun ga mein
Jau kaho gi sunnun ga mein
Jhoot say he kush hau loun ga mein

Mujh say jhoot tum hamesha bolna
Sach keh kar dil na mera torna
Kaho mujh say kay sab theek hai
Theek hai yahan sab theek hai
Jhoot ki ab aadat si hai
Sach say ik nafrat si hai

Meri jaan ab bus jhoot he bolna
Meri jaan jhoot bolna

Another Chance

2009-09-02T21:36:00.000+06:00

01/09/2009
Another Chance (by Ahmad Babar):
You are lovelier than a love song
More beautiful than a dream
And I just want you to know
I am better than what it seems
I may not be what you want
But for you I will always be there
Whenever you are looking for a friend
Or just for someone who cares
I will be there to wipe your tears
Everytime that you cry
And I will spend my whole life
Trying to answer each and everyone of your 'Why's'
I know I have had made mistakes
And have hurt you in the past
But give me a chance at redemption
And I promise your pain won't last
I will let go of my bad habbits
And I will try to be better
With you standing by my side
I will show the world what really matters
I won't ever be scared again
Of saying what's in my heart
Please give me another chance
To once again win your heart
You are lovelier than a love song
More beautiful than a dream
And I just want you to know
I am better than what it seems

Hope

2009-05-15T22:41:00.001+06:00

11-02-2008
Hope (by Ahmad Babar):
She is waiting for someone to come wipe her tears
To help her overcome all of her fears
To show her the greener side
To help her sail above the tides
To show her a world better than this
To take away her insecurities with a simple kiss
To hold her hand when it matters most
To find a way out for her when she is lost
To be there to catch her whenever she falls
And then to help her rise above all
With a simple smile to light up the dark nights
To fill her life with stars and light
To help her rise when she is down
To keep her flying above the ground
The one to make her dreams come true
The one who always says "I Love You"
But she knows all of her searches are in vain
And she is destined to suffer this pain
She looks around once again
Wondering if she really is insane
Or are the ones that have kept her here?
Far away from everywhere
She looks out of her "Roxn-e-Dewaar"*
And feels grateful that she isn't what they are
Maybe one day she will be free
Till then she says "I am and I shall always be me"
*Opening in the wall of a prison cell

Too Early

2009-04-28T14:00:00.000+06:00

28/04/2009
Too early (by Ahmad Babar):
Its too early for love
Hell, its too early to even confess
I don't want to rush this time around
And risk losing everything else
Lets just start by being friends
And then maybe we can take it from there on
Till that time lets not play around
Cause love is more than just a love song
I know that its not easy
But I am not ready yet
My heart's still sore
And I can't place another bet
But I promise I will always be there
Everytime that you need a friend
And when you are down and low
I will be there to hold your hand
And I will try to play
The broken strings on my guitar
And if it doesn't work out
I will walk away with the scars
But I won't ever try and hurt you
That just isn't how I am
I might be a fool
But I know how to be the man
So understand me and forgive me
If I ever cause you pain
Let me know when it starts to hurt
And I won't ever do that again
And I will try to play
The broken strings on my guitar
And if it doesn't work out
I will walk away with the scars

Mother

2009-01-29T20:19:00.000+05:00

29/01/09
Mother (by Ahmad Babar):
Mother, don't cry tonight
Just pray and everything will be alright
Don't you miss me if I ever go
Even if I am not here I won't ever let go

I just want to be the perfect child
Who wept your tears whenever you cried
Oh mother I love you from the bottom of my heart
Don't you worry for forever my love will last

Oh mother! Oh mother! Oh my sweet mother

Mother, don't cry tonight
Just pray and everything will be alright
Don't you miss me if I ever go
Even if I am not here I won't ever let go

I am sorry for all the times that I hurt you
I would be nothing! And I am nothing without you
I promise to never leave you alone
My love for you will never be gone

Oh mother! Oh mother! Oh my sweet mother

Mother, don't cry tonight
Just pray and everything will be alright
Don't you miss me if I ever go
Even if I am not here I won't ever let go

No words can ever say what I feel
At your feet I kneel
You have always been my star
And I will love you whether we are near or far

Oh mother! Oh mother! Oh my sweet mother

Mother, don't cry tonight
Just pray and everything will be alright
Don't you miss me if I ever go
Even if I am not here I won't ever let go

Falling in love...

2009-01-26T13:36:00.000+05:00

24/01/09
Falling in love (by Ahmad Babar):
Falling in love, falling out of love in these grounds
Still I can hear echos of past sounds
The sun still shines bright each day
Its amazing how people still remember my ways

I wonder how the stars still shine each night
No matter how dark my life gets they are still bright
Maybe from them I should learn a thing or two
Then maybe, just maybe I can get back to you
Falling in love, falling out of love in these grounds
Still I can hear echos of past sounds
The sun still shines bright each day
Its amazing how people still remember my ways

My girl is somewhere out there and I wait
I hope I meet her soon, before its too late
I want to be with her yet again
Maybe that will ease my heart's pain
Falling in love, falling out of love in these grounds
Still I can hear echos of past sounds
The sun still shines bright each day
Its amazing how people still remember my ways