Aiman Azlan

Moving Up in Education

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Tue, 14 May 2013 10:34:00 PDT

Revised Bloom's Taxonomy

My Sociology professor showed us this pyramid in class today. It's the revised version of Bloom's Taxonomy. It is a useful tool to evaluate how students (i.e. us) are doing in school. The further up we go in this pyramid, the better we are at grasping the knowledge.

When I look at this pyramid and think about the education system that I'm currently in, I can't help but think that I may be lingering mostly on the bottom of the pyramid (Remembering/Memorizing).

The best that I have been to is probably the Applying level (I might even poke into the Analyzing level a little bit), partly due to the help of teachers and my own personal motivation. I believe both elements are essential in order to move up the pyramid - mentor's support and personal motivation. If I'm not interested in the subject, I won't invest my energy in it. If I don't have my mentor's support, I may get lost.

But still, why can't I go further up even if I have both? I believe one of the main factors is the 3rd element - the system. The system calls for something other than the building up of unique individual minds. The system paints all students in one color. The system calls for remembering and memorizing in order to ace the exams. After all, that's what matters most right? At least, that's what we're being educated towards.

If we want to change this, then we must educate ourselves away from the current path the system pushes us towards - from being memorizing robots to being creative humans. Great individuals in our history weren't memorizers, they were creators. They create and develop ideas. They make the world a better place.

My rant for the day.

I hope we can go all the way up the pyramid. Insha Allah.

5/5/2013 - Malaysian General Election

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sat, 04 May 2013 22:07:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

1. Don't vote for a party just because your parents are voting for that party.

A legal voter is at least 21 years old. I hope that person is mature enough to think for him/herself.

Allah commands us to have ihsan (excellence) with our parents. That does not mean that we nod our heads and agree with everything. There is also ihsan in disagreements if one exercises Prophetic manners.

2. Don't vote based solely on popularity or current trend.

Educate yourself. Listen to all sides, consider them, perform istikharah (recommended), and make a decision.

3. Don't hold any ill-feelings towards those who don't support the same party as you do.

What kind of environment are we creating for future generations if two people who support different parties can't get along? What maturity are we displaying in that?

If a person wants to vote Party A, then respect his/her decision. It's his/her right to do so. You can try to convince him/her to change his/her mind, but the final say doesn't rest on you.

Disagreements don't necessarily make enemies.

4. Mind your own business.

Don't go around asking people which party they're voting for (or against).

That's all.

Lets exercise our right, and lets exercise it wisely.

Bismillah.

Seek Wisdom: Anywhere, Anytime, Anyone

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 22:19:00 PDT

Photo by Aiman Azlan

"Why did you quote that man? Don't you know he's an Atheist?"

Someone asked me that question.

Why is it a problem that I quoted something from an Atheist, or other non-Muslims for that matter? If what he said is true and in line with what I believe in, shouldn't I acknowledge it (even though fundamentally, we don't share the same belief)?

When I hear something that is profound and/or true, I will acknowledge it as such, regardless of where that something came from.

It would be unjust to disregard truth just because it came from someone whom I have disagreements with; someone who's not "from my own". It would also be unjust to acknowledge something to be true just because it came from someone whom I agree with; someone who's "from my own".

Just because. Just because. Just because?

No, our standards must be higher than that. We don't fixate on the apparent. We don't look at the package, we look at the content and the context.

If what is being said is true, then it is true...even if the one who said it was Abu Jahal (one of the biggest enemies of Islam). If what is being said is false, then it is false...even if the one who said it was Abu Bakr (one of the most precious gems of Islam).

I may disagree with a person on some things, but that doesn't mean that I disagree with that person on everything. I may agree with a person on some things, but that doesn't mean that I agree with that person on everything.

Never Despair

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 07:34:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

We believe in a God that looks at our intention and not the magnitude of our actions.

Do we have the ticket to Jannah?

We have absolutely no clue as to which of our deeds will be our ticket to Jannah. It is very possible that the tiniest good deed that we did within our lifespan becomes the cause of us attaining everlasting bliss.

So never underestimate any good deed. It may look small in your eyes, but maybe that deed will buy you a castle in Jannah.

At the same time, never underestimate anyone. We don't know what good deeds they're committing outside of our knowledge. Some or one of them might be their ticket to Jannah.

We don't know

We don't know if Jannah is written for us, nor do we know that the Fire is written for us.

Hence, we should be hopeful and remain hopeful.

The fact that we don't know should push us to try and to try for as long as we can breathe. Because we don't know, despite all of our imperfections, maybe that one final good deed that we did just before our last breath might be what tips the scale in our favour.

We don't know

Therefore, we shouldn't act as if we know. We shouldn't act as if the ticket to Jannah is already in our pocket. We shouldn't also act as if we are the ones giving those tickets to people.

Jannah has many gates. If one gate is closed, others are still open. Who are we to close all the gates for the sinners we met? Besides, aren't we sinners too?

Never Despair

Never despair in the Mercy of Allah.

Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah . Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful." (Surah az-Zumar: 53)

His Mercy is one that we'll never comprehend.

So, never despair. Allah loves you for trying.

No Politics in Islam?

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 02:59:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

"Aiman, you talk about politics. You are not a true da'ie!"

True story.

Da'ie and Politics

"Da'ie" means someone who invites to Islam.

First of all, I don't call myself a "da'ie". I don't call myself "Da'ie Aiman", like it's some kind of prestigious title. I'm just "Aiman" and I do my best to invite people to Islam. Second of all, I don't talk about politics a whole lot. I don't have a lot of knowledge about it, so I focus more on other things.

But that doesn't mean that I don't care about politics. Politics ain't just for old people in coffee shops. What? You think politics only affect them?

Think again.

Islam and Politics

Now apparently, a lot of people (even Muslims!) think that politics is something that is separate from Islam i.e. there is no politics in Islam.

That is absolute garbage. Not just any garbage, it's stinky garbage. It's so stinky, flies die when they go near it.

Muslim scholars (like Dr. Yusuf Qardhawi for example) wrote books on Islamic politics. Not one chapter in a book, but a whole book just on politics! So how can one say that there is no politics in Islam? You gotta be kidding me.

Just because Islam is absent in today's politics, doesn't mean that politics is absent in Islam altogether. Just because a tool is not being used, doesn't mean that the tool is not there.

Maybe a person doesn't see the tool.

Or worse, the person sees it but refuses to use it.

Or worst of the worse, the person sees it, uses it, but abuses it.

Off to Higher Standards and a Better Understanding

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sun, 21 Apr 2013 13:35:00 PDT

True religiousity is hijacked by shallow and apparent "religiousity".

All you need is to know a few Arabic terms or subscribe to the "religious" fashion trend.

Our Current Standard?

I used to wear kufi (kopiah) and songkok (traditional Malay hat) regularly in school and people started calling me "ustaz". Some even started asking me Fiqh questions.

That's it? I just need to "look religious" to be "religious"? I just need to "look knowledgeable" to be "knowledgeable"?

Wearing a kufi or a thobe (jubah) doesn't automatically makes you a "sheikh". In fact, you don't have to wear those to be a true sheikh. There is no such thing as a sheikh clothing line. A sheikh can wear a thobe, a suit, Baju Melayu (traditional Malay dress - refer to picture, far left), or a pair of jeans and still be considered a qualified sheikh.

Sometimes I wear a kufi, sometimes I don't. Sometimes I wear Baju Melayu, sometimes I wear jeans (sometimes both).

But regardless of what I wear, am I not still the same person?

Am I not the same person?

Sometimes I use Arabic terms, sometimes I prefer to use English terms. It depends on who I am talking to.

Regardless, what difference does it makes knowing a few more Arabic terms? Especially if you don't understand them, then it means nothing at all.

Beyond the Apparent

Having said all of the above, I am aware of situation-specific dress codes and mannerisms (including how one speaks). But that is not the point of what I'm saying here. What I am saying here is that what I wear and the number of Arabic terms I used while speaking, tell you little about my level of knowledge and understanding.

We need higher standards and clearer definitions of these religious titles such as "ustaz", "sheikh", "imam", "faqih" and so on.

True religiousity is beyond the visible shell. It's easy to get caught up by what is apparent. True religiousity stems from having a sound understanding of the religion and a sound heart; those two elements don't necessarily show on the visible shell.

Remember, some shells are beautiful, but they are hollow.

Resources

The following are two good resources to further expand my sentiments.

Imam Suhaib Webb - Understanding and Moderation (1 hour 9 minutes)

Usama Canon - Nomenclature (8 minutes)

Allah Knows Your Name

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Thu, 18 Apr 2013 23:00:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

Allah knows your name.

You, the one who cries at night,
When you are far out of sight,
In the shadows, you seek light,
Allah listens, He's by your side.

Allah knows your name.

You, the one who helped that man,
No gratitude expressed when he can,
Not even a smile or a shake of hand,
Keep sincere, your prize is grand.

Allah knows your name.

You, who thinks that nobody saw you,
Behind closed doors you hide what you do,
In dark alleys where nobody walks through,
You are caught red-handed, if only you knew.

Allah knows your name.

You, who hide behind fake faces,
Crimes committed, leaving no traces,
Untouchable, despite visible vices,
But on that Day, One Judge suffices.

Allah knows your name.

You, on broad daylight,
You, in shadows of night.

Stand Out!

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Fri, 12 Apr 2013 19:13:00 PDT

The Malaysian Students Association of South Korea invited me to share some knowledge via livestream. The title given to the livestream event was "Stand Out!" and with that, they gave me two topics to cover:

1. How to speak with confidence

2. Everyone can be a vlogger

Poster designed by the organizer

Of course, I am no expert. I did my best to share any amount of knowledge I have from the experiences I've gathered.

The plan was for me to broadcast live and record the session at the same time. But, silly me, towards the end of the session I realized that I forgot to click on the "Start Record" button so the livestream ended without any recording to refer back to.

I apologize for that.

Therefore, I would like to share the notes that I've prepared before the livestream as reference and hopefully, my notes will benefit those who did not attend the livestream.

This is the actual notes that I used for the livestream. Of course, I added a few points here and there for clarity. For those who did attend, please share whatever that you have learned (if any) so that others may benefit Insha Allah.

Stand Out!

How to speak with confidence

1. How to speak...

a) Know your material
b) Know your audience
c) Know your medium
d) Know yourself – your own distinct style (stand out!)

2. ...with confidence

a) Vicious cycle: To have confidence, you need experience. To have experience, you need to start doing it. To start doing it, you need confidence.

Confidence: The Vicious Cycle

b) Solution? Gather all your courage and just do it. No easy way, no short cut. The first step is the hardest, but it's worth it.

Everyone can be a vlogger

1. Yes, everyone CAN be a vlogger...

a) All you need is a good camera, good audio, good setup, video editing software, and internet connection – you’re done!

b) Camera – one that can shoot in HD, no need for an expensive camera.

c) Audio – speak clearly, use external mic if possible.

d) Setup – find a place with adequate lighting and little to no background noises.

e) Video editing software – iMovie or Windows Live Movie Maker (what I used for my earlier videos).

f) Internet connection – upload on Youtube (potential to reach large audience).

2. ...but, vlogging is not for everyone

a) Try it out. If it fits your personality, then do continue.

b) We need more people actively engaging with the community (especially Muslim females) and we need more people with varying personalities (different people attract different crowd).

c) ONE CONDITION: Be mindful of Islamic limits.

Screenshot of the livestream. Credits to @aishariduan

5 Tashahhud and 1 Umma

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 21:05:00 PDT

The following is one of the gems I learned from Meaningful Prayer course organized by Bayyinah.

The Tashahhud is what one recites in the second and fourth raka’a (unit) after the second sujud (prostration) in salah (prayer).

5 Different Tashahhud

The Prophet (pbuh) taught 5 different Tashahhud to 5 different companions - Ibn Mas'ud, Ibn Abbas, Abdullah Ibn Umar (the son of Umar al-Khattab), Abu Musa al-Asha'ri, and Umar al-Khattab. They weren't just any companions, but they were the leaders of the community.

All of these 5 Tashahhud were authentically narrated from the Prophet (pbuh).

Now this is the interesting part: All of those companions prayed in the same Masjid and they were all leaders of the same community.

If we are talking about unity, why would the Prophet taught 5 different Tashahhud to 5 different leaders of the same community? Wouldn't that caused division within the community instead?

No.

All of the 5 companions never argued with each other on this matter, not even a father (Umar al-Khattab) and his son (Abdullah Ibn Umar). No one was saying that the others were wrong for not following how he recited the Tashahhud.

There was only one criterion that they upheld: the Tashahhud must come from the Prophet (pbuh) himself. If that criterion is met, then nothing else matters.

Nothing else matters.

Unity or "Unity"?

The Prophet (pbuh) built his community without chanting the word "unity" left, right, and centre; a mere lip service. He built a united community through practice. He made unity real.

Today, we hear unity is being talked about like it's a fairy tale. Unity this and unity that. But there's no life to it; no content to it. Just a hollow word that is being thrown around.

So lets be real for a moment. Lets not cover up reality with fantasy.

How can we say we're united when we can't even pray together because we're not of the same Mazhab (school of thought)?

How can we say we're united when parents don't approve of us marrying someone just because he/she is of a different race?

How can we say we're united when we have mosques built right across from one another?

How can we say we're united when we can't be friends with someone who holds a different political opinion than us?

How can we say we're united when we can't be in the same room with someone of a different jama'ah?

The Prophet (pbuh) never taught us that we all have to be exactly the same. Unity is not uniformity. He taught us to be united in our diversity. He taught us to accept and love one another despite of our differences.

Unity in diversity.

But where do we begin? I think, this is an excellent first step: Respecting Differences of Opinion

Is She Ready for Marriage?

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 22:15:00 PDT

I heard from Shaykh Zahir Bacchus this story of a man who came to Shaykh Sulaiman Moola. He told Shaykh Sulaiman that he has a daughter with such and such degree, with such and such job, and makes such and such amount of money.

Then he said to the Shaykh, "I think my daughter is ready for marriage. Do you have somebody in mind for her and do you think she is ready for marriage?"

The Shaykh replied, "No, she is not ready for marriage. She is ready for divorce."

What is the intention of marriage?

That is the question that we need to ask ourselves right now, whether we're married or not. If you are married, then you can renew your intention. If you're not married, then make the right intention now.

It's not too late, not yet.

Lets educate ourselves on the Sunna of marriage so that we may differentiate between what is cultural and what is Deen.

In the story above, the criteria that the father put forth as priority were all materialistic ones, with Deen out of the picture - a recipe for disaster.

When seeking the pleasure of Allah is not the main intention, then we are paving for ourselves a path to failure.

"Nothing other than the intention has caused the dwellers of Paradise to dwell in it." - Imam Hasan al-Basri

A Dumbfounding Question

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 09:26:00 PDT

Made using memegenerator.net

Someone emailed me and asked me a simple question that left me dumbfounded:

"How do you change a person's mentality?"

At first, I thought I have the answer to that question. But after pondering on the question for some time, I realized that there is no easy answer to it even though it looks like a simple question.

But it's not.

As of this moment, the best answer I can give to that question is "I am not sure". A person's mentality is not like a piece of clothing that you can simply change at the end of the day.

So yeah, I am dumbfounded.

Having said that, I appreciate questions that I don't have answers to. They make me realize how much I don't know and how much I need to learn.

Thanks guys.

Untapped Potential

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sun, 31 Mar 2013 16:16:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

We All Have "Something"

"I wish I could be like you."

"I don't think I am any good."

"I have no talent."

A believer is always hopeful and optimistic, no matter how bleak the situation may appear to be.

Who am I but a boy with ideas and thoughts to share?

I am sure there are many, many, many more out there better than me, with greater ideas and deeper thoughts to share.

Allah entrusted human beings, us, with the world.

"And when your Lord said to the angels, 'Indeed, I will make upon the earth a successive authority.' They said, 'Will You place upon it one who causes corruption therein and sheds blood, while we declare Your praise and sanctify You?' Allah said, 'Indeed, I know that which you do not know.'"

(Surah al-Baqarah, Ayah 30)

"Indeed, I know that which you do not know."

Allah would not have given us the position of authority over the earth if we don't have the "stuff" for it. The angels doubted us once and we may even doubt ourselves from time to time, but Allah believes in us.

What better motivation is there?

Therefore, I have no doubt that every individual can contribute positively to the society and to the world. I refuse to believe that Allah created a human being to be totally useless, unless the individual him/herself makes no good use of his/her life.

I believe the potential is there, but like precious gold, it is buried deep.

“You will find that people are mines [of gold and silver]. The best of you [before Islam] in the time of ignorance are the best of you in Islam if they have understanding [of the religion].”

(Sahih Bukhari)

O God, Make Me a Servant

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 22:26:00 PDT

Photo by Aiman Azlan

I find that helping people, just for the sake of God, to be therapeutic.

An Honoured Station

Expect nothing in return except for the ability to serve. Ask God for that. Ask Him to make us servants - servants of the people. Ask Him to put us in the position of service. Honestly, the position of service is an honourable position in the sight of God.

The Prophets were servants - they served their people and they ultimately served God.

Those who serve others are following the footsteps of the Prophets, and really, whose footsteps are better than those of the Prophets?

A Path to Contentment

When you serve others, you are stepping into worlds beyond your own. In effect, those whom you served are stepping into yours too. This sharing of worlds is more than an exchange in perceptions, rather an expansion of perceptions.

You start to realize that the problems that you personally have aren't that bad. You start to realize how big the world is, with its infinite possibilities. The world is not bleak and gloom as you might have thought before.

So if you ever feel down, help people. They could be your family, friends, or strangers in the streets.

Your problems aren't the end of the world. There are others who are experiencing worse. Out of this understanding, you start to feel thankful.

A Sense of Responsibility

It's not enough to say thanks with your words to express thankfulness, but it's a start. Thankfulness should motivate you to act, to use those blessings you have in your hands and spread them to other people.

Find every opportunity in your life to do that. Find every opportunity to help. Utilize your life for service.

The best of people are those who are beneficial to the society.

Ask God to make you a servant, because to be able to serve others, in and of itself, is a great blessing.

Alhamdulillah. Praise be to God.

The Puppeteer

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 20:04:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

With misty glasses I'm blind,
Yet I can see where I'm going,

The destination I crave,
Is the one I avoid,

Still my feet are walking,
Obeying another master,

When I'm there I wonder,
Can I find my way home?

O puppet, who's your puppeteer?
Be the master and cut the strings.

Emotional Bullying

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sun, 17 Mar 2013 04:50:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

Emotional bullying is the worst kind of bullying out there.

Where is the pain?

If you punch someone in the face, you see the blood and your hand would probably hurt too. You know where the wound is and you can treat it. It'll heal pretty quickly too.

But if you hurt someone emotionally, you will not see the blood nor will you feel any pain in your hands like when you punch someone. The person you've bullied may or may not display the signs of pain and you may or may not remember hurting that person.

You don't know where the wound is and you don't know where to apply the bandage. Chances are, it won't heal in a day or two.

People who bully physically have done something wrong, but people who bully emotionally have done something worse. The worst of them all are the ones who do both, and that happens a lot unfortunately.

Poisonous tongues

Emotional bullying can be done in many ways, but the method of emotional bullying that we often take for granted is inflicted using our tongues.

Calling people names, making fun of other people, racist comments, inappropriate jokes, spreading rumours, etc.

A simple sentence or even a word that is placed out of line can cause damage so severe you wouldn't believe it. You might think it's not a big deal but to the person you've bullied, the reality is much different.

Each is unique

Each individual human being is a collection of experiences. Each one is unique.

What's okay for some might not be okay for others. You can't assume that the things you say will be accepted exactly as how you would accept them, and you can't hide behind the lame justification "Oh, I was only kidding."

To you, a word might mean nothing and you might think you're using it as a harmless joke. But to the other person, that word is hell.

That is not an exaggeration.

Abu Hurayra reported that Prophet Muhammad said, "Anyone who believes in Allah and the Last Day, should speak good words or be silent." [Agreed upon]

Speak good or speak nothing.

Real life vs Internet

To make matters worse, we have the internet now. Not only can one person bullies another, that person can do so on a larger scale. It is no different than defaming a person in front of thousands of people. In fact, that is exactly what it is - public defamation.

There is something about the internet that makes matters worse: anonymity.

Being anonymous makes people feel "invisible". Anonymity suggests to the mind that one can do anything and nobody will know about it. Although it might be true that nobody knows who is the person behind the fake username, but Allah knows.

Allah knows.

Allah knows who you are and what you did.

This post is my reaction towards what happened to Amanda Todd, who committed suicide after being emotionally bullied in real life and on the internet.

The Turnaround

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Wed, 13 Mar 2013 13:23:00 PDT

Photo by Umar Mita

A deed gone and another comes,
How I longed to imprison these desires,

Regret has been my closest neighbour,
To which I spend my time the most,

Tears fall with no sound,
Stealth curse thrown unheard,

The one door I knocked echoes back,
Others I walked through with ease only not as I hoped,

Judge the cover not my friend,
For it is neither illusion nor reality,

The filth lies beneath in which heaven cannot reach,
and hell cannot seek,

Searching blame I found only the mirror,
A stranger's eyes fixed upon mine,

O Lord Almighty! Shine on the mirror,
but not on the reflection.

An Eye Opener

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 20:51:00 PST

Today, I learned about visual impairment in my Psychology class.

We watched a video about 3 individuals with different visual impairments.

John

The first individual was a kid named John.

He was blind from birth, but he was far from handicapped. He was an intelligent kid with big dreams. He wanted to be many things, among them were an astronaut, a dispatcher, and a newscaster.

One of John's friends said something beautiful. She said, "Blind kids are normal, they just can't see."

I don't know why, but what she said almost made me cry.

Kyle

The second individual was a teenager named Kyle.

Due to a medical complication early in his life, the doctor had to perform a procedure that rendered him blind. But the doctor didn't blind his abilities. Depending solely on his keen tactile sense and his ear for music, he could play the piano very well. On top of that, he had the dispositions of an actor and he was chosen to act in his school plays.

Kristen

The third individual was a woman named Kristen.

She was not blind but her vision was greatly impaired. She had to make due with the residual vision that she had. Her overall vision was very blurry and her peripheral vision was almost nonexistent.

But she was not helpless. She too had big dreams. She worked as a lawyer.

A lawyer! (Mindblown)

Towards the end, she said, "To me, everyone is beautiful. I can't see blemishes or wrinkles on their faces."

3 incredible people.

Makes me think to myself, "God gave me functional eyes, but do I really see?"

Redefining and Refining Da'wah

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Thu, 14 Feb 2013 16:13:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

On Facebook, I came across a video by Shaykh Usama Canon about Da'wah (link to the video) and I highly encourage everyone to watch it.

Then, I scrolled down to the comment section to read a few comments. Usually, this is a bad decision on my part because 8 times out of 10, the comment section (be it on Facebook or Youtube) is filled with disappointments.

But Alhamdulillah, I am glad that I scrolled down to that particular comment section because I found gems upon gems of honest views from honest people, about Da'wah. I want to share those views with you all here:

Person #1

I don't think I understand bringing people to Islam, that seems pushy and semi forceful. The attempts of some people doing dawah is to challenge a person's faith and practices; to bring the other down. That is inflicting a trauma on another human being. That is oppression.

I wonder if dawah could be explained in a different way?

Say perhaps, wanting for another human being to feel a safe and contented trust that they are not alone, that love is with them, and that there is always a way for things to improve.

The question of who are you really giving dawah for, is a good one. Sometimes, well intended Muslims who start to become passionate about giving dawah take a literal approach to 'spreading' Islam, and then it becomes a challenge, with the passion more focused on having someone 'surrender'.

But, is it truly wanting a surrender (opening oneself to feel God's presence and love) to God with the intention/motive above? Or, is it an ego problem? Or, is it a problem of patience - it takes lot's of love and patience to be truly accepting and open to accept people as they are.

The beauty in finding Islam and connecting with God is a sensational feeling.

Person #2

Many of us do only concentrate on increasing the quantity of the ummah rather than concentrate on helping the individual increases the quality of his/her life.

We scream takbeer upon hearing someone say the shahada but then walk away from them completely feeling accomplished and confident that we brought "someone into the club" and collected our "points".

It is a shame because da'wah has become really watered down and conducted in an almost business like manner and what's worse, more and more people end up leaving the deen because they are abandoned.

May Allah guide us all. Ameen.

Person #3

Things that get called "dawah" tend to not be dawah, because if you're really doing it then there's no real need to throw a label on it.

That pamphlet can't solve my problems, that website is only going to answer so many of my questions, and did you really think I would walk into the mosque to strike up a conversation with the "Dawah Committee"? Explaining who we are isn't going to be done at tables, it's going to be done smiling at the workplace and enjoying ourselves outdoors and having outstanding business values and contributing to the community.

The only thing that brought me to where I am today is that I was blessed enough to have beautiful people around me. If they hadn't been real people, if they hadn't invited me to dinner, if they didn't constantly greet each other, all of the essays and arguments and lectures in the world wouldn't have brought me in.

And I don't think that I'm an exceptional case.

"If what you're doing is really attractive, you don't need to sell it." (Usama Canon on Revisiting Dawah)

My Weird (but Awesome) Dream

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Fri, 01 Feb 2013 05:00:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

This is a dream I had.

Out of anger, I punched a guy's face so hard that I might have cracked a few bones (hey relax, it's a dream). I ran away because I was feeling guilty. He ran after me.

Oh, the suspense!

Maybe I was too slow because the guy caught up with me in the end. So, I gave in. Plus, I knew that I deserved the punishment. I told the guy to punch me back in the face, just as hard as I punched him.

I was scared, because I knew it was going to hurt badly. I closed my eyes and waited for the fist.

The guy just gave me a nudge, and he smiled.

That was it. He didn't punch me back, even though in all honesty, I deserved that punch.

He forgave me instead.

I woke up, with tears down my cheeks.

How to Pursue Marriage the Halal Way

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Thu, 24 Jan 2013 22:33:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

Before reading this post, I recommend you reading this one first: In the Pursuit of Marriage.

Before we begin...

This is just a guideline of how to pursue marriage the halal way. Do keep in mind that there is a degree of flexibility when it comes to pursuing marriage the halal way.

It is not a rigid, black-and-white thing.

To put it in simple terms, what we need to know is what not to do. That basically means knowing and understanding the concept of gender interaction in Islam. Once we have familiarized ourselves with that concept, then we will know our limits and we will know better not to cross them.

Judging from the emails that I have received over the past year or so, I see that a lot of people (especially people my age) are confused about or unaware of how to pursue marriage in the right way. Therefore, I feel obliged to contribute whatever I can.

I also feel afraid.

I feel afraid to write this post because I don't know if I am the best person to touch upon this topic. Please keep in mind that I am not the number 1 guy you should go to for advice on this matter. Whatever I wrote here stems from my personal experience and from attending a few marriage courses.

I ask Allah to forgive me for my mistakes and I ask Allah to bless me in my effort. Ameen.

Let me reiterate that this is not a rigid, black-and-white thing. There is a degree of flexibility. My aim in writing this post is to give you an idea of how to go about pursuing marriage

I hope that this guideline will benefit you, Insha Allah.

Step 1: You found someone

You found someone who looks like a good potential spouse for you.

You found the person yourself

Maybe you were searching or maybe you weren't, but you found that person nonetheless. Maybe in a class, maybe in an event, maybe in a club (not a night club, okay?), maybe in a Masjid, maybe in your neighbourhood, etc.

Someone suggested the person to you

Or, maybe your friends, your family, or someone else suggested the person to you and you find that person interesting. It is important to know that other people (including your parents) can only suggest to you whom to marry. They can't force you to marry that person.

Now that you have an interest in someone, lets go to the next step.

Step 2: You want to know more about that person

Islam never teaches you to marry a total stranger. But if that is the case, how do we come to know the person we want to marry?

Dating?

At this point, people usually go out on a date. But dating, based on its popular practice, is seen as inappropriate in Islam (except if a man and a woman are already married, in which case it is recommended!)

When people know that dating is not the way to go, they are left with a question,"How am I suppose to know about the person I'm going to marry if we don't date?"

That is a valid question and those who preach against dating often times fail to answer this question. Hence, leaving the questioner feeling confused and lost.

I am going to attempt to answer that question by offering an alternative to dating, a better alternative.

Alternative: Ask around

Ask around about who and how the person is.

Get in touch with people who know him/her best. Personally, I think the people you want to get in touch with are his/her close friends, particularly friends who lived and/or traveled with that person.

If you can get in touch with the person's family members, that's awesome! Family should be the closest social group to a person. Hence, they should know that person very well.

It is important that the people you're asking your questions to are honest with you and understand the seriousness of the situation. Consider this as an amanah (trust).

He/She must tell the truth, even if he/she has to speak negatively about your potential spouse. This is one of the few exceptions when talking negatively about a person behind his/her back is not considered as backbiting. For example, say a woman asks me about my close friend whom she is interested in. She asks me, "Is he hot tempered?" If my friend is indeed hot tempered, I have to tell her the truth. But how much detail should I tell her? That depends on the necessity. If it's not necessary for me to tell her certain details, then I shouldn't do so.

He/She must also keep the conversation confidential. For example, if a woman contacts me to know more about my close friend, it is my responsibility to keep our conversation private. I don't go around and tell people about it.

What to ask?

1. I guess a proper way to start is to ask whether the person is available or not. If the person is taken, then he/she is off limits. By "taken", I don't mean that the person has a boyfriend or a girlfriend. By "taken", I mean that person is already engaged or married.

Alternatively, if the person is not looking to get married at the present moment (for various possible reasons), then you can't do anything about that too.

2. Provided that the person is available, now lets look at some of the things that our Prophet put emphasis on.

a) For a husband, our Prophet emphasized on two things: Akhlaq and Deen. These two things are not the only thing that you should look for in a man, rather they should be the top two things on your list.

"If a man comes [and asks for your daughter's hand in marriage] who possesses ethical conduct and religious origin, then marry him [to her]. If you do not, it will be a great trial and mischief on the face of the earth." (al-Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah and al-Hakim with a sound chain of narrators)

b) For a wife, I think we all know of this famous Hadeeth:

"A woman is married for four reasons: her wealth, her lineage, her beauty, and her deen. So choose the one with [good practice of] the deen, may your hands be rubbed in dust." (Bukhari 5090; Muslim 1466)

This Hadeeth does not suggest that the deen is the only thing you should look at and nothing else. This Hadeeth suggests that you should put her deen as your no. 1 priority. This is similar for seeking a potential husband, as mentioned above.

Imam Ibn Hajr (rahimahullah) explains: "We understand from the [above] hadeeth a recommendation to marry beautiful women except in the case where in there is a beautiful woman who is not religious vs. a religious woman who is not beautiful [i.e. you should choose the religious woman who is not beautiful]. Indeed, if they are similar in their deen, then the beautiful one is more worthy of marriage!" (Fathul-Bari 9/134)

Islam is a realistic religion.

You can ask about other things that are important and relevant to you, but don't go beyond that. You don't have to know everything about him/her. You only need to know enough about the person so that you can make a decision.

3. Compatibility is another important factor to consider.

A better alternative?

I mentioned before that this is a better alternative. Why?

Because you are asking the people that know the person inside out. They have been together with the person long enough to see the spectrum that made up that person you want to marry. They have seen the person in his/her best and in his/her worst.

They have known the person honestly and clearly. There is no acting and pretending.

Unlike dating.

Step 3: Consultation

It is important to consult people who are experienced in the areas of marriage.

Parents

I would recommend that the first people who you want to consult with are your parents. Other people that you want to consider for consultation: a marriage counselor, an Imam, a friend who is married, a teacher, etc.

Ask them for advice and guidance.

Step 4: Istikharah

This is the key in this whole endeavor.

I highly recommend that you check out the video below by Sheikh Abdul Jangda. He comprehensively explained the concept of Istikharah and how to perform it properly.

Istikharah: How To & Why? - Shaykh Abdul Nasir Jangda

Step 5: Making your decision

Based on the answer to your Istikharah, make a decision whether you want to propose to the person or not. Or if somebody already proposed to you, make a decision whether you want to accept the proposal or not.

Whether you want to propose or answer a proposal, you can do so in a few ways:

1. Inform the person directly (Facebook, email, text, letter, etc.).
2. Inform the person through a third person (a parent, a friend, or anyone else you trust).
3. For men, I highly recommend that you go straight to her house and ask for her hand from her father.

Step 6: Determination and Tawakal

Accept the outcome (whatever it may be) with an open heart. Have faith in Allah and be optimistic.

Final thoughts

This guideline is not the only thing that you should rely on. Please don't.

My aim is just to give you an idea of how to pursue marriage without causing Allah to be displeased with you. My aim is to show you that there is a better way of getting married, without going through the impermissible.

This topic needs to be taught properly. A blog post is not enough. I know that this blog post does not answer all questions. But that was not my intention. Like I said before, I just want to give you an idea of how to pursue marriage the halal way.

But really, when you learn this stuff, you'll realize that pursuing marriage is easy. The sad thing is that we make it hard.

The society needs to take heed. There are a lot of young people out there who want to get married (some of them need to get married), but they can't. Sometimes they can't get married for legitimate reasons, such as not having the financial means. But other times, they can't get married for reasons that are ridiculous and can be avoided.

For example, "You can't get married to that person because he/she is not from the same country/race/hometown."

Seriously, what kind of a reason is that?

Don't make the halal hard. Because that will make the haram easy.

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To supplement this blog post, I highly recommend that you watch this video: Towards Solving the Marriage Dilemma - Sheikh Alaa El Sayed.

What is Psychology?

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sun, 20 Jan 2013 21:00:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

Lets begin by addressing two misconceptions that I often hear:

Psychology is not just about crazy people. It is about people.
Psychologists are not psychics. We can't read your minds.

People often asked me about the field that I'm currently studying in university - Psychology. Recently I found a comprehensive explanation about what Psychology is. I thought I'd share the explanation here for anyone who is interested.

The information below was taken from the book "Culture & Psychology", 5th edition, by Matsumoto and Juang.

Psychology can be understood from its goals:

Goal #1: To build a body of knowledge about people.

Psychologists seek to understand behaviour when it happens, explain why it happens, and even predict it before it happens. Psychologists achieve this by conducting research and creating theories of behaviour.

Goal #2: To apply the knowledge to intervene in people's lives, to make those lives better.

Psychologists achieve this in many ways: as therapists, counselors, trainers, and consultants. Psychologists work on the front lines, dealing directly with people to affect their lives in a positive fashion.

These two goals are closely related.

Psychologists who are on the front lines take what psychology as a field has collectively learned about human behavior and use that knowledge as a basis for their applications and interventions.

This learning initially comes in the form of academic training in universities. But it continues well after formal education has ended, through continuing education programs and individual scholarship - reviewing the literature, attending conferences, and joining and participating in professional organizations.

Applied psychologists engage in a life-long learning process that helps them intervene in people's lives more effectively.

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Related post: Why did I choose Psychology?

Four Moments in Prayer

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Fri, 18 Jan 2013 05:00:00 PST

Photo by Zulfaqar Mohd. Khair

The five daily prayers are the pillars that keep the Islam in a Muslim's heart stand firm. The Muslim is the caretaker of these pillars. It is imperative that the caretaker keeps them in check and takes care of any imperfections, for they are not free from imperfections. They are not suppose to.

It is the caretaker's job to keep them standing strong with constant care and regular check ups. Otherwise the whole structure may collapse, even from a single crack.

I reflected upon my prayer and upon my (lack of) concentration in it. I found myself fixated on four different moments in my prayer. I feel that these four moments are pivotal in my prayer and to pass them by without reflection - albeit for only a second - would be the crack to my pillars.

The Takbeer

The moment when I first say "Allahuakbar". I raise my arms up, palms facing front. I throw everything aside as I bring my arms together and embrace my body. I throw everything aside, except Allah. Except Allah.

Because Allah is Greater.

Allah is Greater than my worries.

Allah is Greater than my possessions.

Allah is Greater than my loved ones.

Allah is Greater than myself.

As I embrace myself, I exit this world and enter into a new world where it is just me and Allah. In that space and time, there is true bliss. This, as how my Prophet expressed it, is the coolness of my eyes.

The Fatiha

The moment when I recite, "It is You we worship and it is You we seek help from."

This outlines my purpose in everything I do in life and in doing so, I realize that I need His help. I am in total dependence to Him, and Him alone. Being a Muslim is not easy, and rightfully so. It shouldn't be easy. Life is hard. Life is a mess. Such is the nature of this dunya.

But being a Muslim equipped me with the tools to handle the hardship, to persevere, and to succeed. To be content.

"It is You we worship and it is You we seek help from."

I think that one line summarizes a whole lot about what or who a Muslim is. A short sentence that speaks volumes.

If only we reflect.

The Sujud

The moment when I lay my forehead on the ground.

Is there a humbler experience than this? Is there a symbol of dependence more profound than this?

The closest place I can be to my Creator. In this lowest position, my heart is at its highest.

In my sujud, I speak most intimately to you, O Allah.

The Shahadah

The moment when I reiterate the declaration of faith in my Tashahhud. This is what a person says in order to enter into Islam. This is also what a Muslim says in each prayer, at least five times a day.

Imagine that. Being a new Muslim after each prayer. Rejuvenated.

"There is no God except Allah and Muhammad is His Messenger."

This shows me my destination and the path I must take to get there.

Where?

Home.

In the Pursuit of Marriage

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sun, 06 Jan 2013 23:01:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

Someone sent me an email asking me a very good question and I think I should share my answer here. I hope it will be beneficial, Insha Allah.

Q: I know that we have to put an effort into pursuing marriage. But what does that mean? What exactly do I have to put my effort in?

A: Regarding effort, I can summarize it in two dimensions:

1. Yourself
2. The potential spouse (husband/wife)

1. Yourself

This part is the most crucial. You have to put in the effort to better yourself (not only applicable in marriage, but in life as well). Allah doesn't ask you to be perfect, but He does ask you to try your best to become as "perfect" as you can be.

Don't become a spouse only after the nikah, start becoming a spouse NOW! Don't become a parent only after the birth of your first child, start becoming a parent NOW! This means that you have to analyze yourself in terms of your potential as a spouse and as a parent, before entering into the marriage.

In order to do this, you have to come up with some kind of a system to evaluate yourself in terms of your progress as a Muslim - evaluate your relationship with Allah and His creations.

For example, your five daily prayers. You could evaluate your progress by counting how many times do you pray on time.

For example, your relationship with your parents. How many good have you done for them this week? How many bad have you done unto them this week?

Like the saying goes, "Take account of yourself before you are taken into account."

2. The potential spouse

Not only do you have to work on yourself, you also have to know what kind of a spouse you're looking for. My contention is that you will seek based mostly on what your heart desires.

If your heart desires Allah, then you will seek a spouse that can help you get closer to Him. If your heart desires dunya, then you will seek a spouse that can help you get closer to dunya.

Not only that, you have to realize that you are not just choosing a spouse but you are also choosing a parent for your child. Know that the first right of your child is that you choose a righteous parent for him/her.

The Prophet said, "Choose a spouse for your children..." (Ibn Majah).

Here, he gave us a tool (this is not the only tool, but it's an important one nonetheless) for us to evaluate who is the best person to marry. Not only that, this tool can also be used to evaluate ourselves.

Istikharah

With this effort, don't forget to do your istikharah.

Istikharah is a way for us to seek counsel from Allah. To learn more about istikharah, Shaykh Abdul Nasir Jangda gave a comprehensive explanation about istikharah in this video:

Allah knows best.

May Allah accept. Ameen.

The Illusion of Numbers

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Sat, 29 Dec 2012 21:08:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

Oh, we are so preoccupied with numbers. Today I thought about the numbers that I have.

What does 40,000 likes on Facebook and 25,000 followers on Twitter mean? Do they mean that I am somewhat better than someone who has less than 40,000 likes and 25,000 followers? Am I more "credible" because I have those numbers?

If so, then riddle me this: what about the Prophets? Some of them had only a handful of followers and some of them had none.

NONE!

But they are Prophets, the greatest human beings ever walked on this earth. If numbers were the measuring stick, then where do you place them?

Astaghfirullah.

I learned a valuable lesson today: Truth is free of numbers.

Even if the whole world is on my side, without Allah al-Haq (the Truth), then I am nothing.

Nothing. That number is zero.

I Met a Famous Singer

noreply@blogger.com (Aiman Azlan) — Wed, 26 Dec 2012 04:47:00 PST

Photo by Umar Mita

Yesterday, I was in close proximity with a world-renown singer.

If I mention his name, it is likely that you will know him. But I won't mention his name because it's irrelevant to the point I want to make. Just knowing how famous he is is enough to bring meaning to this point.

It was the time of Maghrib prayer when I saw him. In order for me to go to the prayer room, I would have to walk pass him. As I slowly approached him, there was an increasing feeling of admiration in my heart.

"OMG, it's him!"

"Wow, I can't believe he's here!"

"He's so close, I can touch him!"

"I want to take a picture so badly!"

"OMG! OMG! OMG!"

I saw that people were crowding him. They are possibly driven by the same feeling that I felt in my heart; the result of being close to a celebrity.

I bear no ill feelings towards that famous person. I admire his work and Masha Allah he is doing a good job.

However, as I walk slowly closer and closer to him I am faced with a dilemma: should I stop to meet him or should I continue walking and pray my Maghrib prayer?

My inner struggle was rough. The argument was simple.

"This may be my only chance of meeting him! So I should stop and say salaam. Perhaps take a picture with him."

Then it hit me. As compelling as that argument was, I find it to be a trap.

"Am I willing to delay my meeting with my Lord just because I can't delay my meeting with this man?"

No. Something is not right. Though my admiration towards him was almost instinctive, but what I do with it is my choice.

So I walked pass him and answered my Lord's call.

I am not saying that we cannot love those we admire. There is nothing wrong in that. I still admire him as I walked pass him. But if I am to choose between him and Allah, then my choice should be obvious - Allah.

Take control of love before love takes control.

If somebody or something is more dear to us than Allah, then we need to recalibrate our love. We need to reflect upon where Allah is in our heart.

May Allah bless that famous person. Ameen.

Even if I do not meet him here, I hope to meet him in the Hereafter. As famous as he is, he is still my brother in Islam after all. Thus for any brother (or sister) of mine, I should wish nothing more or less, than a reunion in Jannah.

May Allah guide us all to love and to love wisely. Ameen.