Coffee House

Ten things you do on Facebook that shit me

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sun, 10 Jul 2011 07:21:00 +0000

Stop guessing.

This is not about your Cityville invite to build the city of my dreams, run trains, launch ships and more.

Or your desperate cry for help to survey your farm land.
In fact, I don’t mind your game invites at all.

I find it amusing that you reckon I could be your Poker buddy, that I will give you four cups of All Purpose Flour to run your cafe and help you make delicious cakes while playing ‘Tea4Friends’.
The truth is I suck at poker, can’t tell the difference between Atta and Maida and the only thing I probably make in style is Lipton Dip Tea.
But you don’t know this. So I don’t mind your invites.
After all how does the ignore button achieve its ‘life purpose’, right?

***
This list of ‘things you do on Facebook that shit me’ is a very different one.
It is a list of things my Facebook friends ‘commit’ that I struggle to control.
Mostly I am amused, sometimes annoyed and once in a while speechless.
So here’s my list in order of annoyance from to 10-1, 1 being super psycho.

NOTE: This post was not written with any particular person in mind.
So don’t take it personally, be offended, unfriend me, call me a bitch and create a scene.

***
10) Setting up a Fan Page for yourself
Are you serious?
Did you accidentally set up a page instead of an account?
Or do you think it is high time your acquaintances and friends became your fans too?
Unless you are some sort of a celebrity or one in the making, I am not sure I follow your logic and that cracks me up!

9) Making a calendar of friends’ birthdays and worse, tagging them
Why do you do that?
Do you print these January Birthday photos and pin them on your bedroom wall?
Are you afraid that Facebook might screw up and forget to notify you of their birthday?
Worse you tag your January born friends.
As if there is a chance they might forget their own birthday.
If this is an app you have accessed, have you ever, ever questioned its logic?

8) Punctuating your post. Or not
If it is not funny enough that you write a Facebook post to say you have emailed someone, your utter lack of respect for the ellipsis or any punctuation for that matter is (if only mildly) disturbing.

Dear A,
Read your email and I have replied to it…………………………………………
‘Reply me’ when you have a moment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!With Love; P

7) Updating your status with sad, poignant and mysterious statements, every single day
A normal person has a thousand wishes…but I have only one…to stop you from updating your status with sad, mysterious and philosophical messages that want me to choke you. You might have been back stabbed by a friend. I have been too. In addition I have lost my job and a parent, broken up with my boy-friend and been rejected a visa. My life sucks too but save the self-pity. Let me know when you have moved on. Please repost this in honour of someone who moved on…one who stopped annoying us with sad LIFE quotes copied from various pages on the Internet. I know 97% of you won’t post this as your status…but 3% will.

6) Sts updts tht rd lke dis
Are you on drugs?
Do you confuse Facebook with text messaging?
You have 420 characters to update your status.
Then why do you torture my soul with updates that look like you have been forced to use the left over characters from a game of speed Scrabble.
Dis msg is 4 ppl who wrt lke dis. Hw tuf is it 2 wrt in full? It is nt kewl!

5) Using David Beckham’s or Pippa Middleton’s photograph for your profile picture
It is okay. Occasionally. May be L.A.Galaxy won a match.
Or you are celebrating Doppelganger week on Facebook and someone mentioned that you are a Pippa look alike.
But if you have celebrity photos or low resolution images of Simpsons quotes (that you found on the Internet when you googled ‘FUNNY’), as your profile picture FOREVER, then it is strange. Just strange.

4) Changing your last name to your status
Either you are stuck in Orkut 1.0 beta mode or you simply don’t get it.
How can your last name be ‘happily-married’, ‘in- Hawaii’ or ‘on-a-roll’?
Why don’t you explore the possibility of updating your daily status, relationship or current city?
How am I supposed to respond to a friendship request from Raj Coolismylastname?
It is really not that funny, unless, your last name is ‘has-no-clue’.

3) Letting your dog post on my wall
I know he is ‘sooo cute’.
But he can’t post on my wall and ask me to Skype with his momma.
It is unnerving enough he has a Facebook account.
It is so not ‘awwww’ when he does that. So not!

2) Checking into bed with your partner
Screams PSYCHO
Not funny.
Not cool.
Just wrong.
Stay away from Facebook Places.
Please.

1) Allowing your new born to poke me
Welcome to creep-fest heights.
Have you any idea how unsettling it is when your three-day old baby pokes me?
Friend, I have come to accept a lot of things in this friendship.
Like the fact that your bundle of joy has a Facebook account of her own.
That she uploads her own photo albums.
And captions them with much creativity like “I couldn't stop giggling” “Me, when I was two days old”
In some way I even get it.
But allowing him or her to poke me is both bad manners and spooky.
So stop it.

As I said earlier, no offence intended. I certainly look forward to our continued friendship on Facebook.

Six lessons from an adventure holiday in New Zealand

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Fri, 11 Feb 2011 13:01:00 +0000

My Kiwi adventure began on Christmas Day'10 on what I call a 'pseudo international' flight from Sydney to Auckland. With four kilos of carry on luggage and 'Seat Only' tickets on Air New Zealand, this was quite literally the 'lightest' trip I had ever made (I remember carrying more luggage from Chennai to Pondicherry).

Here are six lessons from a near perfect adventure holiday in New Zealand's North Island.

1. Sometimes the journey is more exciting that the destination

Day 1: Hole in the Rock, Bay of Islands, New Zealand. Photo Courtesy: Siddharth Chandrasekar

Driving from Auckland to the Bay of Islands to go on a cruise to the famous rock, Siddharth and I comfortably, almost implicitly, followed our three year old Garmin. That is, until it began taking us on endless stretches of abandoned and precarious gravel roads in the name of 'avoiding traffic'. Driving at 10kmph, we arrived at our cruise pick up point in bad mood and only two hours late.

I am not sure if I can attribute it to the proper alignment of our stars, but the staff at Awesome NZ were so welcoming and flexible that within minutes we were on our way to the famous 'Hole in the Rock' on a fast boat ride that was incredibly true to its promo line 'adrenalin, fun and adventure'.

2. It is not in the head...or is it?

Day 2: Black water rafting, Ruakuri Cave, Waitomo

When I signed up for the Ruakuri cave adventure I knew one of two things would happen. Either I would overcome claustrophobia or I would die trying. After all, black water rafting, watching limestone formations inside a cave that originated millions of years ago and staring at magical glow worms are straightforward, only from outside the cave.

Yet, as I was floating and tubing on the underground river, leaping on my back into cold and cascading waterfalls, navigating through the seemingly endless and bottomless cave, depending on the flow of the river and the distant voices of the guides to find my way, I discovered, as Siddharth often says, that my fears are in my head.

3. Your biggest weakness can be your biggest strength

Day 3: Hell's Gate Geothermal Park and Wai Ora Sulphur Spa, Rotorua

The first thing you'd notice about Rotorua is the ridiculous smell in the air caused by active thermal activity, erupting geysers and geothermal springs.

To pay no attention to this smell, transform it into a 'natural' experience and make Rotorua an adventure destination is simply sheer genius.

Walking past pools of boiling mud on a gloomy day, I could see why GB Shaw had called this particular geothermal reserve Hell's Gate.

Overlooking the unearthly reserve was the Wai Ora spa that invited us into its warm sulphurous waters promising to refresh, exfoliate, detoxify, revitalize and give us the much sought after wheatish complexion (I am kidding of course). The only annoying part of this truly relaxing experience was the lingering smell of sulphur that continues to haunt our swim wear.

4. What does not kill you only makes you stronger

Day 4: White Water Rafting, Grade 5, Kaituna River, Rotorua

When our complimentary pick up van pulled into the rafting base, Siddharth spotted a bill board that explained how we were about to raft on the highest commercially operated waterfall in the world and he was furious. A mariner himself, he was not remotely faint hearted but the likelihood of damage to his already sore back worried him endlessly, and he would later discover, rather needlessly.

Along with our guide, Sydneysider Catherine and her mate from Brisbane, we set forth on one of the best water adventures of our lives. We rowed hard, struggled with instructions, closed our eyes at every rapid and nearly contributed to the River Rats statistic that 'one in twenty nine rafts overturn'.

Catherine probably got the best bang for the buck when she tumbled into the river while we rafted down the highest rapid. The guide deeply appreciated Siddharth's rowing abilities and sense of balance and all of us came out like conquerors.

5. There is nothing trivial about a Skydiving experience.

Especially not its costs.

Day 5: Nzone Tandem Skydiving, Rotorua

Skydiving in Rotorua makes it to the top three most incredible moments of my life and I have a feeling it will stay there for a long time. Even now when I recall the 'dive' my heart beats faster and I feel nervous.

It was only when the plane chugged 12000 ft into thin air, I realized what an insane idea it was. I recited Hanuman Chalisa and thought of my family. My heart pounded rapidly and I feared I would pee in my suit.

When the time came, I reluctantly jumped from the plane and I swear there are few words to describe the outlandishness of the moment. The entire experience was surreal, up in the air, hanging from a parachute and looking at the the world below, like it was a normal thing to do.

The photos and videos package was almost worth another sky dive, but what the heck, you only do these things once.

6. Never judge a restaurant by its name. Or its location.

Day 6: Satya, South Indian Restaurant, Auckland. Photo by Siddharth Chandrasekar

Yes, I am a food xenophobic. I can't get over the awesomeness of Indian food especially (for lack of a better word) the orgasmic combination of crisp Dosai + Sambhar + Chutney and so I hunt down Indian restaurants wherever I go. Well you can judge me, but that's the truth.

On one of our last evenings in Auckland, Siddharth who sometimes shares my passion for the Dosai chose 'Satya', a South Indian restaurant that also had the rare Uttapam on its menu.

On our way to the restaurant, I wondered about its quality and lack lustre name. No India Palace, Little India, Spices of India, Tandoori Palace....simply Satya. As we pulled up in front of the restaurant, my suspicions were confirmed. Just a block away from Satya was a strip club with a massive A rated bill board. I made a huge fuss about the location and accused Siddharth of being careless. I shut up and acknowledged my narrow mindedness as soon as I tasted the most brilliant Dosai I had had overseas, ever.

So yes, there they are, six lessons from nine days of adventure and I can't wait to explore the famous South Island, NZ. You see, I have mountains to climb and more fears to conquer.

Any Good News?

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 13:19:00 +0000

“Any good news?” enquired my sixty something neighbour aunty, as I stepped out of the taxi. This year, my summer holidays in India began on that note of interest. A deep interest displayed by a variety of people in our society – the neighbourhood shopkeeper, a friend’s would-be-mother-in-law, the Secretary of the ‘Colony Association’ as they bump into twenty something married girls they hardly know.

Earlier that day, I had invested about two hours of flight time mentally preparing clever remarks that I would come back with to tackle the profound curiosity of acquaintances and fifty something maamis, about the success stories of my sex life. Yet, as I stood in front of the familiar building in good old T.Nagar, no witty response came to my mind. Instead, I found myself mumbling something like “Not this time aunty” and hastily walking away, realizing that no amount of preparation can train you for the missile

Any good news?

The bad news is that it is launched infinite times, restrained and otherwise by a number of ‘relatives and friends’ and by the end of my holidays, I had heard it all - from the delicate

Are you and your husband happy?

the implied

Hasn't it been three years since your wedding?

the ingenious Your classmate Lavanya has named her second daughter Diya
and the candid

When is your father going to have a grandchild to play with?

This time there was even an order

By this time next year you should be in the family way!
No kidding – by this time next year. Clearly adding a branch to the family tree is that straightforward.

Don’t misunderstand me. I am neither against the idea of breeding nor do the incessant and obnoxious family quizzes fluster me. I only find it tedious to explain my life’s plan to random folks I bump into. Every time a person so innocently picks my brain I find myself questioning their logic and motive – and in most cases I am unsuccessful in discovering a reasonable answer.

Since pretending not to have heard the question never works with maamis who are adamant to hear your story, I often try the “My husband and I are living together in the same city. Isnt that great news in itself maami?” Mostly it works. Other times I surrender and listen to the scientific explanations and strong recommendations of these self-made family counselors – “When I was twenty six, I had my fourth child” (Clearly your recreation options were rather limited!), silently counting my blessings. After all, the REAL good news is that these nosy neighbours are an exclusive summer holiday special.

As for my own parents and immediate family - they say,

Leave it to God. He will make it happen when the time is right

Easy. Isn't it?

Oh wait – Why is God a ‘He’? Well that calls for an entirely different post, doesn't it?

Nothing like Australia - Tasmania

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 07:52:00 +0000

For most part of my life I have lived in a big and busy city...so a getaway break was something I always looked forward to. And then some remarkable events brought me to Tassie, a pure travel destination, a physical stunner! And ever since I have looked around for 'unique experiences', not featured in Lonely Planet Guides...Here is a list I hope to keep updating for the rest of the year.

Hollybank: Tree Top Adventures

Catch an incredible bird's eye view of the intriguing forests of Tasmania by gliding across treetops. You can enjoy the adrenaline rush of a high-wire, super-fast canopy ride in Hollybank, just twenty minutes from Launceston.

Wynyard: Unforgettable Views
The Wynyard Tulip Festival (September-October) is a chance to walk amidst thousands of blooming tulips and feel like a Bollywood star in a romantic song sequence. If flowers do you no good then explore the bleached sands of Sisters Beach and go swimming in the crystal clear waters of Boat Harbour Beach.

As they say, Tassie is nothing if not for its dazzling wilderness, colonial charm untouched beaches and incredible wine and food. Its urban spirit, fairly recent, will make you wonder if God froze time in Tassie for a small period in time. For a place that accommodates some amazing natural wonders, Tasmania is rather shy...this is my attempt to unearth its dazzling character.

I love Chennai

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 10:07:00 +0000

I have waited a long time to see this postcard. To see the cultural capital of South India get branded. Although an 'I love Chennai' postcard is hardly any 'destination branding,' it is a refreshing step in that direction.

I love Chennai postcards are available at Ashvita, R.K.Salai

For a city like Chennai that has a fine history and a rich culture, it has often been misunderstood and sometimes even written off. (Remember the Lonely Planet review that claimed that Chennai lacks the optimistic buzz of Bangalore?)

But look beyond its oppressive weather and difficult auto-drivers, you will find history in its sights and smells. Competing on every respectable stage beginning with technology, manufacturing, culture, education, media and cinema, Chennai is a grand assortment, a city that has something for everyone.

Yet there's very little that has been done when it comes to branding the city.

WHAT MUST BE DONE?
While the government must continue to invest in roadworks, waterworks and civic maintenance, there is an urgent need to tackle outsider perceptions of the city. Government, business, arts and media must come together to promote Chennai as an exciting destination for investment, tourism and talent! The very same principles of branding products apply to branding cities. So we need a strategy and a well executed campaign that will improve the city's image and communicate a promise of value to both its residents and its visitors.

I hope we can learn from New York, L.A., Melbourne and Sydney, some cities that have been marketed more than successfully. And no, I am not referring to a tourism logo, a tag line and a city web page, although these elements are an integral part of a branding exercise. I hope our government too can commit to thousands of Rupees to help create a brand identity and boost national and international tourism.

I hope there will be campaigns, destination brochures, city information centres and souvenir shops that will soon put Chennai-ites (or Madrasis?) on the same pedestal as New Yorkers!

To a terrific 2010!

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 05:32:00 +0000

In the beginning there was nothing. God said, "Let there be light!" And there was light... Watching jaw-dropping fireworks by the Sydney Harbour Bridge has been the highlight of the new year so far! Here's to a terrific, mad and exciting 2010!

Postcards from Melbourne

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 08:55:00 +0000

Bourke Street - saturated with department stores, malls, high-end boutiques to cafes, restaurants ranging from Vietnamese to Thai, is a heaven for those who love to shop and those who love to eat!

A performance on Swanson street (thanks Dave Krunal 46 for correcting me) - brimming with life, the city is home to the best in music, art and fashion.

Similar to the acclaimed Macy's windows in New York city, Myer on Bourke Street had a grand Christmas window up. Crowds of people, young and old hijacked the pathway as they stood glued to the animated OLIVIA windows!

Parvathi's Diary - Scents and Scenes

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 04:41:00 +0000

The only way Parvathi kept track of days during summer holidays was by following serials that appeared on DD Metro. This morning the unimaginative tune of Chandrakantha woke her up...just when she was about to ride appa’s brand new scooter. For a while she wriggled in her bed in an effort to shed the drowsiness and then jumped on to the mosaic floor. As she walked past her thatha (whose hands were busy conducting the coffee wave from the tumbler to the davara) Parvathi gave him a dramatic good morning salute. She didn’t notice his gesture in response, as Parvathi was already headed in the direction of an aroma that was beginning to envelope the house.

In the kitchen Paati sat meddling with the karuveppalaia and the delicious scent of arachi vita sambhar made Parvathi hungry instantly. But as it happens with children, Parvathi’s attention to food was brief and it hopped on to her young cousin in the verandah. He sat there memorizing the ranks of gigantic men on ‘WWF’ cards.

While Amma had forbidden them from playing The Singapore Airlines cards, somehow it was okay to engage oneself with meaningless cards that had men’s biceps and chest sizes listed on them...As she stood at the entrance of the verandah staring at her cousin who had staunchly refused to play more intelligent games, she noticed something.

Something beyond the dependable walls of her grand parents’ cosy home in Officer’s colony. Something that grabbed her attention in a manner that the sambhar or the Herculean men on those cards had failed to do! As she took in the scene, Parvathi stood defeated by many emotions that swamped her all at once....May be it was the peppery air around her or the hopelessness she felt when it came to her cousin’s silly games, you see, Parvathi couldn’t stop crying.

Birds of Paradise

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 02:43:00 +0000

"We all lead boring, ordinary, mundane existences and now and then a bird of paradise comes along, and we all get scared. It scares us because we're not like that, our feathers aren't brilliantly hued in red and green, we're brown and gray and seeing that bird of paradise makes us feel ugly or as though in someway we have failed. Some of us love to watch that bird, and we dream that one day we might be birds of paradise too..."

My most favorite lines from Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach, 1970

Sid's shot of the Blue & Gold Macaw, Jurong Bird Park, Singapore, July 2009

The path less traveled

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 23:14:00 +0000

I believe that sometime during his sailing years Sid got the idea that continent hopping was fashionable. That can probably explain how we found ourselves in Australia. Of course there was the motive of higher education. I, for once followed him like a dutiful obedient wife to the second largest city in Tasmania,Launceston...

Honestly to call Launceston a city might be a bit of an exaggeration. When I look at it, the place reminds me of surreal pictures in exotic travel magazines and Lonely Planet guides. Nothing like the ever-so-crowded world of Pondy Bazaar or the urban ruggedness of Dallas.

But I get the feeling I am not remotely disappointed by the absence of bling malls and gigantic super markets. You see for a non-nature lover I surprised myself by falling in love with this small yet beautiful place. I wouldn’t call it quaint...but Launceston seems to be lost somewhere in between its natural unspoilt environment and its raging enthusiasm to keep up with the concrete civilization.

Caught sight of a massive and perfectly semi-circular rainbow while walking back from work and was reminded of how...

We may run, walk, stumble, drive or fly but let us never lose sight of the reason for the journey or miss a chance to see a rainbow on the way!

Mangalore Marvels - Day 2 of 3

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 09:13:00 +0000

A part of a post does little justice to the magnificence of the gigantic idol of Shiva located on the banks of the Arabian sea. At 123 feet, it is the tallest idol of Shiva in the world. Designed to receive the rays of the sun throughout the day, Murudeshwara shines in an unparalleled radiance, delighting his large and eager audience.

After Saturday night’s rest, we reached the Murudeshwara temple on early Sunday morning. Apart from the main deity, we found two other deities interesting – Dattathreya and Jattigeshwara. After the darshan we headed up the stairs to learn and enjoy the history of the place. Right beneath the massive idol is a cave carved with murals narrating the origin of Murudeshwar (again in Kannada). If you prefer, there are guides outside the cave who would be willing to narrate the story with its engaging nuances in a language of your choice.

Our final and obvious destination was the beach beneath. With its fine sand and angular waves, it is easy for a bunch of travelers to forget their agenda and relax in the waters.

While we did not check out the Tipu Sultan’s fort in the vicinity, it might be a good place to check out if you have the time.

After breakfast at the RNS Highway Hotel we headed straight to Kollur.
Where to stay: The RNS Hotel on the beach. The air conditioned rooms can be a little too expensive at Rs.2000 per room for a day. Your best bet is the RNS Highway Hotel maintained by the same management on the way to Murudeshwara. Located 5 minutes from the beach, this newly constructed hotel has the facilities of a 4 star hotel and offers clean and fully furnished rooms (including TV) starting at Rs.300.

After Shiva, we headed to see Shakthi on the banks of the Sauparnika river in Kollur. It was in this Moogambikai temple that we waited for almost half an hour before we received the Darshan, despite having purchased special tickets @ Rs.15/- for a short-cut to see the deity. It is believed that Goddess Mookambikai, the unified form of Lakshmi, Saraswathi and Parvathi appeared before Adi Shankara in this very Kodachadri valley.

The lengthy queues, the gold plated crest and the “jerugandi” (or move quickly) orders inside the temple gives the impression that one is in Tirupathi. Being a part of the seven “mukti” sites in Karnataka, Kollur attracts thousands of devotees every day.

The temple hosts some rare idols like the panchamukhi vinayaka (five faced Ganesh) and a string of lingas such as the Pranalingeshwar, Partheshwar, ChandraMouleeshwar and Nanjundeshwar. More information is available here.

After a photo session at the Agumbe sunset point, our final call for the day was on the banks of the Tunga river, the beautiful Shringeri, one of the most prominent Hindu sites of pilgrimage in India. Words can do little justice to the striking scenic features of this place. There is little surprise that Adi Shankara decided to make Shringeri his home ground where he stayed and preached his principles of Advaita Vedantha. The Sharada temple in the premises houses the most pleasing looking deity bedecked in exquisite ornaments.

Nearby is the Vidyashankar temple, acknowledged as an architectural wonder, where the first rays of the sun corresponds with the zodiacal sign of the month that is engraved on its walls!

There runs a bridge across the river and on the other side is a dense rain forest. If not for our packed schedule, we would have loved to stay back in the lovely gardens of Shringeri where there are guest houses run by the temple administration. After an early dinner right outside the temple, we left to Horanadu, where we had planned to stay the night!

Mangalore Marvels - Day 1 of 3

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 08:36:00 +0000

A brilliant journey cutting across the glorious green canopy of Karnataka began with the darshan at our family deity’s- Kateel.

Kateel (Cut-eel) is a magnificent Durga temple right in the middle of river Nandini is located 27 kms north of Mangalore. The presiding deity of this temple is the “Sowmya Rupa” or the softened manifestation of the fierce Durga Parmeshwari. The deity’s unusual sitting posture is evident as her feet peep out firmly from under the elaborate decoration and a grand saree (most likely to have been an offering from her devotees).

The deity had such an unmistakable charm, certain ‘cuteness’ about her that almost everyone wanted to catch a glimpse of her poised form before we left. With the sound of flowing water (Nandini) and the echo of gigantic rain drops falling on the temple roof in the background it would have been easy to have remained immersed in the lure of this temple.

Legend has it that Nandini (the daughter of the sacred cow Kamadhenu) was cursed by a sage Jabali, to flow as a river on earth and that Durga takes birth as her daughter to release her from the sage’s curse.

You can read more about Kateel history here.
Kateel can easily be the starting point of your pilgrimage+of a weekend getaway. Not only is it located only 25 minutes from the city, but the route to the temple is also absolutely scenic, cheerful and green. Our next destination was Udupi. However on the way to Udupi we stopped at four other must visit sites.

First was the Bappanaad Durga Parameshwari temple located in Mulki. It is believed that Bappa, a Muslim merchant was responsible for building this temple. A detailed explanation of the temple history is available here.

At the temple, you are likely to notice the fine architecture, the neatly maintained premises, and the temple authorities who are friendly and personal. The Bappanaad Dolus (drums) an essential part of the temple’s annual utsava (festival) hang majestically in a corner. If you like you can capture some of these antique instruments on camera as you are allowed to do so.

Our next stop was at Sri Vishweshwara temple, Yellur.The deity Vishweshwara is represented by the Shiva linga with an imposing face. The Linga is made of ‘Rudrakshi Shila’ a rare variety of stone and we were told that the Linga was discovered by a tribal woman who found the ground bleeding after she cut the woods. The attraction in this Yellur temple is the giant ox (Nandi) who is decorated splendidly during festivals and other special occasions. More information is available here.

Kunjaragiri Durga and Pajaka Kshetra

Located on a hill in Pajaka (the birthplace of Sri Madvacharya) around 9kms from Udupi is the Kunjaragiri Durga temple also known as Durga Betta. With two flights of stairs, it is an easy climb up hill. This is a must see location as it offers a fascinating panorama of the land around and the Arabian sea beyond.

Upon climbing down we visited the ancestral home of our Guru, Sri Madvacharya at Pajaka Kshetra. It is amazing to see how the place tightly holds traces of the life of Sri Madvacharya. Every visitor is first taken to see the Ananteshwar deity in the premises and then guided around the house. One is offered snippets from Sri Madhva’s life (in Kannada of course) including stories about the magical banyan tree and the two mammoth rocks that Madva used as a lid to protect milk from cats. It might be useful to have someone with the knowledge of the language accompany you.

After quick darshans at the Chandreshwar and Ananteshwar deities in Udupi we landed at one of the most ancient temples in Udupi, that of Sri Krisha. The idol is adorable and is decked up elaborately with rich jewels and stones. Although one can see him only through a small window on the beautiful carved door of the shrine, the spectacle is breathtaking.

The manifestation, believed to have been installed by Sri Madvacharya leaves a memorable and lingering impact. One must not miss the “Kanakana Kindi”, a small window through which Kanakadasa, a lower caste devotee of Sri Krishna is supposed to have been blessed with his darshan.

You can find the legend of Udupi Krishna here. If you land up in Udupi around lunch or dinner time (like we did) there is a vegetarian restaurant by name Sarovar that you might want to check out.

On our way to Murudeshwar from Udupi on Saturday night, we stopped at Anne Guddi a Ganesh temple. A large silver Ganesh dressed in rich tones awaits his audience and five year olds take up the responsibility of distributing the prasadha. After a long and magnificent day we headed to Murudeshwar through pouring rain and highway traffic. The Maravanthe beach beside the road added to the excitement late that night

Two to Tango

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sun, 17 May 2009 19:22:00 +0000

It was another evening well spent at Alliance Francaise. Rebelz, a relatively new theatre group in Chennai, released their first production for this year - Two to Tango.

The production was an assortment of two plays 'Playwriting for Dummies' and 'Alice in Blunderland'. The show kickstarted with 'Playwriting...' a short play with an interesting twist to the art of playwriting. Preethika Hari as the world renowned playwright Sheila Punter gave a tremendously natural and realistic performance. In a story about characters taking control of a play, Preethika connected well with the audience.

Despite more than a couple of "rewind" moments in the play, the actors maintained pace with ease.

I am personally a fan of minimalistic sets, but this one was too empty for my taste. I was reminded of Gowri Ramnarayan's Mathemagician where Aarabhi Veeraraghavan had created a minimal but fine and artistic set. While such intrinsic artwork might have been unnecessary, a little detail could have created interesting compositions. I must grant one thing the lighting was impecabble; minute-minute and beautifully co-ordinated to help the audience focus on the characters. Overall short and sweet!

It was however 'Alice in Blunderland' that was certainly more entertaining. A handful of actors, another handful of masala in the story, well scripted lines, decent use of sets and apt costumes that made Alice in Bluenderland complete and enjoyable. Simon works for a company that appreciates family values in a man. In all earnest he engages an agency to send him one Miss Alice to act as his girlfriend in front of a boss. The fun and laughter was nearly unstoppable this evening with several 'Alices' playing their parts in their own true style!

Of all the ladies this evening, it was Anupama who stole the show. She was a lady of few words today, playing a non-english speaking girl mistaken to be Alice. Anupama was a riot with her expressions that truly spoke her mind. In my opinion, if someone can make an audience laugh with some priceless expressions and a one liner "I pay, I stay", then she has truly mastered her character!

With some great support from his co-actors, Ashwin as Simon pulled off a neat and well rehearsed performance. Had the introduction of 'Alistair Campbell' been avoided the play would have scored full points for script tightness as well! Once again the presentation was rather stretched only because it claimed to be against a British setting. There was some interesting experimentation by Sandeep on the sounds with Tom and Jerry dutifully playing when appropriate. Overall a thoroughly enjoyable show. Who said a team full of technology professionals cannot make your laugh your guts out?!

Where the grass is green

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 06:42:00 +0000

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but the places and moments that take our breath away - Anonymous

This weekend half a dozen of us headed to Valparai, in the Anamalai ranges 3500 ft above sea level. A town that is almost isolated. Surrounded only by staggeringly beautiful greenery! Following a sumptuous lunch at Pollachi and a stop over at Aliyar dam, we drove uphill. 20 of 41 hair pin bends further was the accommodation we had arranged for earlier this month -an unpromoted private bungalow that belongs to one of the numerous tea companies that dominate the area. We were welcomed to a connoisseurs' tea + biscuits session that no hungry flock would have refused.

Our bungalow was a sheer delight - private, peaceful and with all stylish comforts we hadn't quite anticipated. Of all the amenities available to the visitor it was the unpretentious and magical touch of our full time cook Chandran that gave hospitality a new meaning.

The next morning we explored the tea factory, a discreet animal retreat called "Poothotam" and traveled up to Mudis, the highest peak in Valparai. On our way down, we stopped at the small and friendly town and grabbed some chocolate ice creams. By this time the sunny landscape had transformed into a notorious stage for the rains above. We then retreated in a hurry, listening to some Rahman melodies, awe struck by the beautiful moment when the falling drops teased the canopy of leaves above us.

The little time we spent at Valparai was intoxicating to say the least. The eager staff, the inaccessibility to Internet/cellphones, the breathtaking beauty of the small, clean and green scenery left us wondering why weekends couldn't be longer and more frequent...

The stage for this spectacular drama was however set much earlier. After a rugged overnight journey, we reached Coimbatore early Saturday morning. Our first stop was undoubtedly Annapoorna's for a delightful breakfast. Taking advantage of the clean and well maintained toilets, we freshened up and directly headed to Isha Yoga - located in the Vellingiri foothills. The Isha Yoga center acclaimed for its clever combination of ancient Yoga principles and modern science was a spectacular sight. As we sat in an ageless silence inside the humongous dome, an unexplained calm settled over us. There is a beautiful energy and vibrancy about the place that any one who is interested even a little bit in the path of personal exploration is certain to enjoy. I am not sure if it was the profundity of the moment, the dip in the sacred water or the time of day, but we were starving hungry. Following lunch at Gowri Shankars in Pollachi we headed to our ultimate destination - Valparai. Our last stop on Saturday before we reached the bungalow was the Aliyar dam.

Despite the unpleasant heat, the Aliyar dam was full of travelers and locals who were promptly diving into the water that runs inside the park, thronging boats in a mood so festive and so unnatural for some of us who believe we are too sophisticated to enjoy an unassuming cone ice cream on the top of a dam under the unpardoning spite of the afternoon sun.

WHERE: Weekend getaway, small town, staggering scenery near Coimbatore

HOW: Take a train/bus from Chennai and reach Coimbatore. Hire a cab in Coimbatore to avoid depending on local/public transport

TIME: March-November when it is certain to rain intermittently during the day. Forest department also allows entry into certain areas during this peak season.

MUST CARRY: Glares, Caps, Water Bottles, Anti-motion sickness tablets, Summer wear

Bangalore Bangles

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 18:59:00 +0000

Breakfast in Basavangudi, coffee on MG road, visit to National College, dinner at Kamath hotel listening to a soulful kutcheri, prayers at Ragi guda, sloshed evenings at Firangi Paani, hot paranthas from a friend's kitchen, Taste of Rampur, ice cream at Corner House, Changeling @PVR, fire at Forum mall, lunch at Shanti Sagar, coffee with besht friend, shopping at Blossoms, paani puri on Brigade road, The Lord of the Rings, magazine store, coffee at Barista, Midnight's children, vodka at Vaayu's...

Parvathi's Diary - Kumar insists

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sat, 21 Feb 2009 06:23:00 +0000

For those of you who think you know Parvathi...Thank you for loving her so much!

Kumar had telephoned the previous night and asked her for an unusual favor. "Will you meet me at The Fruit Shop tomorrow morning?", he had said with a lady-like hesitation in his voice. And for the first time in her life she wanted to refuse Kumar. "I suggest we meet in the evening. That way we can go to the beach" she retorted hoping that her best friend would get convinced by the sincereity in her voice. Afterall she was not yet prepared to break the news to him. How would he react to her story? Would he accept the idea of another man in her life? Would the three of them hang out in coffee shops together? Or would Kumar leave her life forever? A barrage of questions were haunting her while she waited for Kumar to suggest an alternate plan.

But Kumar was insistent. "No yaar. Why can't we meet as I suggested? What better plans do you have? Thatha and Avva are coming home by Lal Bagh. Amma has asked me to pick them up. And remember you owe me one. The last time you were upset about Prabhakar I heard you out patiently for an entire week. In fact I want you to spend only half an hour with me..." As Kumar went on and on with a list of reasons why she couldn't refuse him two thoughts came to her mind. Why was Kumar so insistent? And what would she tell Dev?

It was way past midnight and she had very little energy to argue with Kumar. Blasted son of a lawyer she thought to herself as she meekly agreed to his plans. She could always come up with something to tell Dev. A flat tyre or too much traffic near Nandanam signal. She was sure Dev would understand. Afterall he seemed to be the guy she wanted to spend the rest of her life with...
29th December 2002

You, I and a chocolate massage!

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 19:50:00 +0000

This valentine's day Sid and I managed to escape to a spa - Aura, located in the heart of the city. We had signed up for an exotic (or should I say extravagant?) 'You and I' massage. After the customary refreshments we were ushered into a royal ruby red suite. There we indulged ourselves in a 'choco+strawberry+essential oils' massage executed in a traditional Balinese style.

The massage full of robust strokes, rolling and kneading almost miraculously cured us of the severe back and leg aches haunting us (following some terrific time on a kinetic honda on the much pleasurable roads of Madras!). This was followed by a rose and milk bath in an imposing jacuzzi and I couldn't help but appreciate the majestic decor that added an unmistakable aura to the entire experience.

I am not sure if it was the soothing influence of the ambient music, the regale setup or the personal service of the therapists but both of us seemed to be in a romantic daze for the rest of the evening.A must-go for any one who is visiting Madras and is overwhelmed by the city's snarling traffic and sunny madness!

Flavors of Madras

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 08:47:00 +0000

From custom made pastas in Little Italy to the Chef's baked bowl at Eden's, Sid and I have explored almost every vegetarian specialty in the city this margazhi season...However our favorite continues to be the signature 'idli vadai sambhar' and 'degree coffee' in Saravana Bhavan on the busy roads of Pondy Bazaar.

There is something nostalgic about relishing the idli dipped in the delicious sambhar. And I have never tasted anything like what I call 'the red chutney'.

It reminds me of childhood. Of days when I used to return in Bus #2 and hurry down the busy roads in order to watch whatever appeared on TV. I used to wait for Amma to return from office, so that we could take the much awaited trip to the Siva Vishnu temple on Usman Road. Now I have to admit that my primary interest was to window shop on my way to the temple. The bangle seller, the poo-kaari, the second hand book store, the kulfi-wala and the the panjumittai-karan with his hot pink cotton candies provided the sort of entertainment that Door Darshan didn't.

And once the archanais and abhishekams were over, Amma would occasionally walk me across to the tiffin section of one of the earliest Saravana Bhavan outlets. On the days she had enjoyed herself at work I would be rewarded with my favourite 'sada dosai' in the A/C section on the third floor. The waiters who by then were our extended family always made it a point to keep an extra kinnam of my 'red chutney'. After dinner I would grab some somph in my right hand and salute the sentry at the door. Outside Saravana Bhavan, Amma would help herself to the customary paan and advice me on the repercussions of children tasting paan! If I managed a convincing puppy face she would buy me a Goldspot or Frooti from Shekar stores on the way home. We would walk back with an unexplained contentment in our lives. And I would thank Siva Vishnu for being so strategically located...

Almost 19 years later, the sada dosai with red chutney (and now a degree coffee has joined the list) brings back memories of innocent days and carefree moments...Of times when all that mattered was that extra kinnam of red chutney!

The not so curious case of 'Slumdog Millionaire'

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 16:58:00 +0000

A couple of years ago I issued 'Q&A' from a library in the neighborhood. That particular copy had hardly been issued in the months it had been in circulation. I noticed a marketing bubble slapped on the cover page. It read 'Now being made into a film'. After a hundred or so pages I was convinced that Vikas Swarup had a knack of being intricate and untangled at the same time. The story teller's incredible gift was reflected in his straight forward story line and the boquet of experiences he had tied together and in style.

Now three years later I sit in front of the TV screen, watching the BAFTA awards on Sony Pix, getting excited and cheering for the incredibly talented and humble cast and crew of the film Slumdog Millionaire. Beginning with a very simple acceptance speech by the genius who scored the music for the madness of Mumbai, A.R.Rahman, the unassuming and enthusiastic responses of Dev Patel and Frieda Pinto to the cheerful Danny Boyle with an infectious pregnant smile, the team seemed to deserve every bit of attention and awards that were coming its way!

There seemed to be honor for the film for simply being stacked against the likes of 'A curious case..' and 'Changeling'. With 7 stunning awards and nominations in almost every other category Slumdog Millionaire, the real underdog, beat the much awed 'A curious case of Benjamin Button '. As they received their awards and congratulated each other, the Slumdog team made competition seem irrelevant.

And now if media reports are to be believed not only did the film win India a couple of statues ,it is now attracting the attention of world travelers to the slums of Mumbai. Now my curiosity is restricted to the big stage... I only hope there arent many surprises at the Oscar!

A choice of accommodations

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sat, 31 Jan 2009 18:29:00 +0000

Pulitzer Prize winning author Jhumpa Lahiri's work(s) have become an obsession of late. Her latest novel, Unaccustomed Earth is rich with thoughts and stories that cannot be quickly forgotten! A rather (brutally) honest reflection of the lives of Bengalis in The United States. The following are her words from the novel (that I am deeply fond of for apparent reasons).

Sudha had no fondness for her younger self, no sentimental affection for the way she had looked or the things she had done. She had looked of course, perfectly ordinary, her black hair worn in pigtails or braids, grown to her waist...And she had done ordinary things: played clarinet in the school band...And yet she could not forgive herself. Even as an adult, she wished only that she could go back and change things: the ungainly things she'd worn, the insecurity she'd felt, all the innocent mistakes she'd made. 137/ Unaccustomed Earth/ Lahiri, Jhumpa

Of nausea and being back home

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 06:08:00 +0000

There is something queasy about coming back home to India. It is not the scorching heat outside, the mangled traffic on the roads or even the invisible odor that hovers around you throughout the day...It is the uncanny ability of people to impose their ideas and opinion on you. In the past week alone there have been moments, moments where I have wanted to scream in rage and wondered if I had the jutsu to inflict similar tortures on them. But of course I am an over-absorbing married woman that belongs to a middle class brahmin family. So it might be a better idea to wear my bindi and tolerate the claustrophobic company of presumptuous people...

Parvathi's Diary

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sat, 06 Dec 2008 20:10:00 +0000

It was a quiet afternoon and one of her favorite TV serials Shanti had just ended. There was no particular reason why it was her favourite. Of course she was captivated by Mandira Bedi's large eyes and impeccable attire. And fascinated by the lives of 'rich people' as shown on DD2. However these weren't reasons why she watched Shanti. In an odd sort of way she didn't have much choice. The only other serial during that time of the day was Swabhiman where the Tamil dubbing was worse. Well, she could have done other things; like build a toy kitchen with Cheruba (the only other pre-teen in Officers' Colony) or play running and catching with her baby-sister (who had just started kindergarden) or solve that week's crossword in The Hindu, Young World. But she chose to watch Shanti instead. If not anything, Shanti's life was richer and more exciting in all senses. After all, as a 11 year old, she better get trained to face the real world soon.

Once the serial displayed its customary 'To be continued tomorrow' message, Parvathi would spend the next half hour reading Champak or Gokulam sitting on her jula. She could never really understand why Swabhiman wouldn't immediately follow Shanthi. That half hour in the middle seemed like days. Although she preferred Shanti over the longer and weepier Swabhiman, she yearned to see the handsome face of Rishabh. At 11 years, her secret love for Rishabh was one of the most promiscuous things she had ever done. And she tried to conceal her impatience to see Rishabh on screen as she read the moral stories in Gokulam. Honestly Nancy Drew and Five Find-outers would have been her idea of 'reading' in the afternoon. However she made a conscious choice to reserve the thrillers for the night. It somehow made the entire experience more chilling. And she liked that edgy feeling...the goose-bumps on her hand when Nancy decides to explore the ranch by herself...

And so she continued on her jula, humming the Shanti title song that was stuck in her head...

America creates history

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 04:36:00 +0000

Today, America elected Barack Obama as its 44th President. The very first African-American President in its political history and I consider myself lucky to have been a part of an experience of a lifetime...For it is not everyday that you see history unfold in front of you. And this is a story I will tell my grandchildren...This extraordinary moment. Here is a nation full of people, who chose to see issues over color, who chose a path that is not just radical, but is sincere and hopeful!

Before you jump on me with all your cynical heart,;I am not an American. I have temporarily made this country my home and I have less than two months left in this land. Yet, I feel so connected, so much a part of this election that I want to experience the "high" of this historic victory and savor it.

While it does not surprise me, what leaves me in awe is the spirit of this nation, well reflected in both Obama's and McCain's speech tonight! In his gracious closure speech, McCain pledged his support to Obama to help him lead us, although conceding that differences will remain. And Obama was equally impressive. For a long time I will remember the smile on his face when he said "Hello Chicago"!

I am excited about this because here are millions and millions of people that voted and voted for change and made the country stand upto its reputation of being a place where everything is possible. And you know what is truly beautiful? The fact that Obama stood there as a lovely leader, underplayed his African-American victory and said "it is only a chance for us to make that change". I particularly loved his mention of the 106 years old lady and her heartaches and hopes. She might not have voted because she was a woman. May be because of the color of her skin. But today like millions others, she was given the right to make a choice and she exercised it.

This is why the democratic victory is not a victory for a candidate, but for an entire nation that embraces free spirit like no other. Truly the land of democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope...

Sangam 2008

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 00:41:00 +0000

Yesterday I hosted the UTD Indian Students' Associations' annual day celebrations - Sangam 2008. Given that this was the 10th year of celebrations, the entertainment was bigger, better and more professional than ever.

To say that the 'desis' present at the Charles Eismann centre last night was one of my most beloved crowds would be a miserable understatement...Because in the last 8 years of professional emceeing I have never addressed such a berserk audience ever!

My co-host Rajiv Karanam and I had prepared a very tight script which did not give room to any last minute confusions. We based it on a Bollywood theme and tried to convert the emceeing into more or less a FilmFare Awards ceremony. But lo and behold! That is reel and real world is very nasty! Some logistics issues demanded that the very well prepared emcees had to fill in for up to fifteen minutes - extempore!

A wikipedia article on Bollywood (that we had printed out in order to have snippets on our fingertips) was our saving grace. Not just that...time and experience had taught us to sport a smile and tell a story without the audience having a single clue about the craziness backstage.

As for the delivery itself, I thoroughly enjoyed interspersing my commentary with Marathi (Shah rukh, tu kutte ahez), Hindi (Ek Chutki sindoor ki kimat tum kya jano), Telugu (ipudi choodu), Punjabi (chado hunnu luvu shuv) and of course in Tamizh (enna koduma saravanan idhu)!

Apart from the insane cheering from the crowd each time I reminded them that I was Aishwarya Rao (and not Rai), friends and school mates screaming out my name in deep affection, the moment I will remember for a very very long time is when I mentioned the name of my favorite rock star- Rajnikant! For a full 40 seconds the crowd applauded in a fashion that could have only one description-maniacal. The last time I experienced such a thing was at the preview show of Rajnikant's Sivaji in 2007. Yesterday, I simply stood in front of the podium sweetly paralyzed by the frenzy of the people in front of me.

It also reminded me of an old lesson.

When you speak to an audience of a thousand people there are various touch points. It is important to touch all of them, but also find that one common thread and connect. Once that happens the engagement for the rest of the show is a cake walk!

Altogether Sangam 2008 was an emcee experience I will cherish for a lifetime...The very adorable crowd (that wondered where I vanished and demanded I be brought back when the second set of emcees took over) made my day. Sangam might have been one of my few non-commercial shows, but the feeling, the sensation and thrill of being a part of a very large and happy Indian crowd was unparalleled!

Microsoft's latest ad - "I am a PC"

noreply@blogger.com (Aishwarya Rao) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 22:47:00 +0000

I wasn't surprised that Microsoft came down a spot (to #3) in the Interbrand Best Global Brands ranking this year. If the value of a "brand" to its business is evaluated just like any other asset, surely the retirement of a CEO whose name was synonymous with the brand itself has to make a difference...

Now for a moment let us forget the ridiculous Microsoft-Jerry Seinfield commercials. And look at this one - Microsoft seems to have done an excellent job with the latest "I am a PC" ad. The idea is simple. (Given it is an outraged reply to Apple's PC user, the idea is not annoying at all). And it tells a story. A normal story that an avaerage person can relate to. A story even a Mac user would enjoy (without admitting it ofcourse!) with a smirk on his face. Yes, it is warm and real. (even with Bill Gates in it!)

I believe a communication like this is a guaranteed winner in this consumer driven world. Simply because it does not insult my intelligence. And it does not complicate things. Or overwhelm me. And also because it sincerely follows the most cliched and romantic theory taught in every brand management class -

Keep It Simple, Stupid!