Alex in Essex

Giant Crabs Descend Upon Detroit

2009-03-14T08:50:00.001Z

"I trust the scientists, they know what they're doing!"

Experts Agree Giant, Razor-Clawed Bioengineered Crabs Pose No Threat

Stacy's Mom

2009-03-10T20:07:00.001Z

For lack of anything better to say, enjoy:

April Fools Day

2009-02-28T20:33:00.002Z

$787 Billion Stimulus
$13 Extra a week
Starts on April Fools Day
Now It Makes ¢ents

HT: Hot Air

Bwaahahahaha!

2009-02-24T20:56:00.004Z

Detroit is so fucked up:

Listen to this, it's the president (President!) of Detroit City Council, wife of Congressman-for-life John Conyers.
Detroit City Council President Monica Conyers got a little heated in her discussion of the controversial Cobo Hall Project

Read this:
Detroit City Council rejects Cobo deal

Go get 'im, Jake!

2009-02-05T23:27:00.000Z

Facebook is Evil

2009-01-23T23:08:00.006Z

Aside from work being rather... interesting, I also made a big mistake a few months ago and joined Facebook. A guy from work suggested it, saying it wasn't just for college kids anymore, and was handy for keeping up with friends back in the States.

Anyway, I've caught up with quite a few friends from HS and college, but man can that site suck you in and make time disappear. I did learn some interesting things, like who's gained weight and who looks the same as always, how many people I know became teachers (a lot!), Julie (Young) Abbott creates some funky art, and Matt Hopkins is expecting a baby girl any minute now.

I can be found here, but don't say I didn't warn you!

Where I've been

2009-01-23T22:25:00.004Z

I know, I know, I haven't posted much the last few months. Here's a summary:

In October, we celebrated Emily's birthday by going into London to visit the London Eye (photos) and the Florence Nightingale museum. She'd been studying about Florence Nightingale, so once she found out there was a museum in London, she had to go.

The girls had the next two weeks off from school, so we did some traveling. First we went to Rome. (photos) There we had a fantastic time visiting the Vatican museums, Sistine Chapel, St. Peters, and wandering around Rome. And the food was fantastic!

Then, after spending a few days at home (and attending the Saints - Chargers football game at Wembley Stadium) we went to Dublin. (photos) Dublin was cold and expensive, but awesome nonetheless.

Three world capitals on three consecutive weekends. Not too shabby.

November was a blur, work was pretty hectic, auto sales continued to tank, etc.

December was better, getting ready for Christmas and looking forward to a couple weeks off. We celebrated Christmas at home, doing the usual Christmas Eve mass and presents on Christmas morning. On Boxing Day (Dec 26th) we left for Tenerife, one of the islands in the Canary Island chain. We had a wonderful time, it was sunny and warm, and the sun didn't go down at 4 o'clock like it did in England. Sorry, no pictures up yet.

Anyway, that's the last three months in a nutshell.

God Bless America

2009-01-20T12:00:00.001Z

I am sure President Bush feels the exact same way as President Washington did when he told President Adams, "I am fairly out and you are fairly in...we shall see who is happier."

Mean Automakers Dash Nation's Hope For Flying Cars

2009-01-07T09:23:00.002Z

Mean Automakers Dash Nation's Hope For Flying Cars

Merry Christmas

2008-12-25T12:28:00.002Z

Holiday Wishes

2008-12-24T10:32:00.000Z

To All My Democrat Friends:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

To My Republican Friends:

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Good news!

2008-12-02T22:52:00.002Z

November Ford sales were down only 30.6%! Compare to:
HONDA 31.6%
TOYOTA 33.9%
GM 41.3%
CHRYSLER 47%
NISSAN 42.2%

Defrosting Instructions

2008-11-27T13:47:00.001Z

Defrosting Instructions, originally uploaded by alecea.

You don't see that in the U.S.: "Thaw your turkey in a cool room for 45 - 48 hours"

In case anyone was wondering...

2008-11-22T15:01:00.000Z

Yes, I am still alive...

Saying of the day

2008-10-21T10:21:00.001+01:00

A fool is a terrible thing to have around, but a fool with energy is a nightmare.

Message from the Queen

2008-10-10T10:00:00.003+01:00

Message From The Queen

To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately.

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas , which she does not fancy).

Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.

Congress and the Senate will be disbanded.

A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

(You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)

1. Then look up aluminum, and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.

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2. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour', 'favour', 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise'. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').

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3. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as 'like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as US English. We will let M*crosoft know on your behalf. The M*crosoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize.

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4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

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5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

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6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

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7. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables.

Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

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8. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

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9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

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10. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting Nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

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11. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

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12. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body Armour like a bunch of nancies). Don't try Rugby - the South Africans and Kiwis will thrash you, like they regularly thrash us.

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13. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

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14. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

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15. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

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16. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 pm with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

And so it begins...

2008-10-09T23:06:00.004+01:00

For the first time my automatic headlamps came on during my drive to work this morning. They've been turning on during the drive home for three weeks, but now it's the beginning of the long dark winter...

Of course, I haven't exactly been leaving work early the last couple of weeks the the markets in turmoil and lots of issues at work. Can discuss much, but suffice it to say we're keeping a close eye on where our cash is and which banks failed this week. My fear is that we screw up and something like this happens (click for larger version):

Best video yet

2008-09-27T10:06:00.001+01:00

Seen on Instapundit, the best political video yet...

Samantha's Birthday

2008-09-13T15:09:00.009+01:00

Yesterday was Samantha's fourth birthday. We met some friends at Pizza Hut for food and a big decorated cookie.

Afterward, we opened presents at home:

This morning she could wait to dance with her Dance With Me doll that her uncle Pat gave her:

Samantha loves to read

2008-09-12T22:19:00.003+01:00

I wanted to record Samantha reading before she turned four years old. :-) I recorded this last night, but for some reason my network connection was reduced to dial-up speeds. Tonight we went out to Pizza Hut to celebrate with some friends, I'll post photos tomorrow morning...

Summer's over

2008-09-04T23:21:00.005+01:00

Today the girls went back to school. Samantha had her first day at the same school as her big sister Emily. She was quite excited. Here are some more photos (click for larger version):

Who Wants to Go Polar Bear Huntin'??

2008-09-03T20:18:00.001+01:00

Let's hope not...

2008-08-31T16:46:00.004+01:00

Keepin' it Classy

2008-08-30T19:01:00.001+01:00

Michael Moore: Hurricane Coming During GOP Convention 'Proof There Is a God in Heaven'

American Prayer

2008-08-26T23:32:00.004+01:00

Seriously, people, go find a church or read a bible, don't join this cult. This is just scary...