If so, you are not alone.

It is very common for people to feel stuck because fear of making change has got a vice like grip of them. As a result they don’t take the actions that will turn the change they want to achieve into reality.

The reasons for fear can be many and varied. Things like fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of what others might think, fear of financial implications, fear of lack of skills and so on.

But it is important to remember that fear can actually be useful in the quest for creating change in your life and/or business.

It is perfectly normal to feel fear when you are doing something new or stepping outside your comfort zone. It alerts you to potential dangers and highlights areas where care, attention and action are required. This focus can help with ensuring the changes you want to make are more likely to be successful. All good stuff.

Fear only becomes a problem when it becomes so consuming that it stops you from moving forward and taking action.

When that happens, and fear is keeping you stuck from shooting for the changes you would really like to have happen, it is useful to have a way to deal with that.

Here is an exercise to help you get started with that process:

Dealing with fear of change

• Get a blank piece of paper. At the top write a change you would like to make happen in your life and/or business.

• List down all the things that you fear about that change.

• For each point on your list, write down what would have to be in place to deal with that fear so that it doesn’t keep you stuck and you can move forward, despite feeling fearful.

• Next work out an action plan to start getting those things nailed.

• Revisit your list and action plan regularly and work out the next steps you need to take – and take them!

As you build momentum and put practical and tangible things in place to deal with your fears you will find it easier to stop the fear keeping you stuck and move forward despite it.

Fear isn’t what is keeping you stuck. Doing nothing about it is what is keeping you stuck.

Taking action to deal with the fears you have about creating change will foster courage. And courage combined with action is a powerful antidote in the fight against fear that keeps you stuck.

So use the exercise above to help you get clarity on the fears you have around changes you would like to make. Create an effective action plan to get yourself unstuck and turn the changes your want to have happen into reality.

Have fun playing with this.

One of the questions I get asked a lot is:

“What is the key to having BOTH a fulfilling life AND a thriving business?”

There are many things that contribute to that.

So I think it is important to start at the very beginning.

A significant contributing factor is that people haven’t got total clarity on what “ideal” is to them.

They know what they don’t want, but what they want isn’t detailed and specific enough to be able to create action plans that will create the results they really want.

Having a fulfilling life AND a thriving business won’t just magically happen. You have to design it and then look for ways to make it happen.

Many people live their whole life by accident or by someone else’s definition of success. They conform to the status quo even though it leaves them feeling unfulfilled.

You have to be willing to challenge your own status quo.

If you don’t design your life, you are leaving it to chance. And that is a hell of a gamble to take with your one and only life.

So if you want to change things in your life and business, you need to start by getting clarity on exactly what a fulfilling life and a thriving business looks like for you.

So, grab a blank piece of paper and a pen and start writing down what “ideal” looks like for you. Be very specific.

Important: this exercise isn’t about what you THINK is possible. It is about thinking, “If I had no limitations, what would ideal look like to me?”.

Don’t underestimate the power of this blank piece of paper exercise. It is the start point to creating a fulfilling life and a thriving business (often the simplest of tools are the most effective!!!).

It is an exercise I use frequently in my own business and a tool my husband and I have used to design our lives – as individuals and as a family.

I did this exercise after my husband had a serious car crash two years ago. It led us to decide to emmigrate to Canada and change a whole load of other things in our lives and my business.

For more on how I used this exercise at that time, read Lessons From A Wake Up Call.

So if you would like something, big or small, to be different in your life and business, I encourage you to have a go at this blank piece of paper exercise.

It is a great way to get more clarity and to get yourself started on the path to a more fulfilling life.

Have fun playing with this.

Related posts:

• 4 Reasons to Start Designing Your Life as a Matter of Urgency
• A Letter to Mediocrity
• Lessons from a Wake Up Call

Sounds like the odds would be stacked against that doesn’t it? But that is exactly what a client I worked with for a few months last year did.

Meet Betty Smith

(Important note: all the work I do with clients is held in the strictest confidence so everything you read here is published with Betty’s approval and kind permission).

I first met Betty when she signed up to do my Successful Women in Business programme (a programme that takes people through a step by step process to create the results they really want in their life and business).

She had signed up because she had a financial need to earn some money and she wanted to get some clarity about the best way to do that and work out a way forward.

As the programme progressed Betty came to one of the group sessions and announced that she had come up with a business idea and had started a food production business.

That is something I got to know about Betty quite quickly – she doesn’t mess about! She makes a decision and gets straight into action.

Her business idea was to produce Poitin (pronounced “po-cheen”) Marmalade and sell it as a premium product.

(For those of you that don’t know what Poitin is, it is an alcoholic spirit unique to Ireland. It can legally only be manufactured in Ireland – in the same way that Champagne can only be manufactured in the Champagne region of France).

At the tender age of 76 Betty was on the path to what would become a thriving business in just 12 short months. Thriving in the worst economic crisis Ireland has probably had in living memory. Thriving even though she had no prior experience of running a food business.

But before it got to the thriving stage, there were all sorts of challenges to navigate.

For example:

• she needed money to cover the start-up costs of the business. But due to her age and the Irish banking crisis (most banks are being bailed out by the state to stop them going bust!!) she couldn’t get a loan. Betty was determined to find a way to raise that money. So she had a good sort through her house and sold a load of stuff and that gave her enough money to get started.

• she had no experience of running a food production business so there was a mountain of things she had to learn about production, business skills, industry regulations and health and safety laws.

• she faced a lot of negativity from some people. Including a number of people telling her that her idea had no potential. And even some patronisingly suggesting she should pack it in, go home and enjoy her retirement!

But Betty refused to be deterred by the many challenges that crossed her path. She found a way round each and every one and kept moving forward.

Twelve months on, her product is already in a national supermarket and a number of other retailers. She has a customer list that is growing all the time. She has been featured in 5 newspapers. She is now adding new products and considering expansion plans.

Her business is thriving. And so is she.

So what can we learn from Betty’s inspiring story of creating success when the odds are stacked against you? What insights can we find about how to create the results we want in our life and business – fast.

Betty and I discussed this at some length and here are some of the factors that contributed to her incredible results in such a short period of time:

• She took action consistently and persistently  – no matter what.

• She committed to learning personal and business skills that would help her achieve her goals.

• She didn’t know “how” to make it happen but she let go of needing to know “how” and just committed to finding a way.

• She experimented – a lot!

• She didn’t allow herself to get knocked off track by challenges, setbacks, problems and negativity of others. She learnt from those things, implemented what she learnt and moved on – fast.

• She was solution focussed, outcome driven and creative in her problem solving.

• She reached out for help and created a good support network – me and the other participants on the programme, local business support organisations and her husband Jim (aged 80, who Betty tells me calls himself the “nuts and bolts” of the business).

• She was willing to step outside her comfort zone – consistently.

• Her mindset was “I have to find a way to make this happen now.” (As Betty pointed out to me, at her age, having a 5 year business development plan isn’t really an option – it HAD to happen NOW).

• She made decisions fast, acted fast, failed fast, took calculated risks and repeated this cycle ongoing.

I asked Betty of she had any tips that she would like me to include in this article. This is what she said:

There are always challenges in life and business. Accept that and commit to overcome them. Experiment. There is always a solution. Take action consistently. Success isn’t a straight road. Keep a sense of humour.

Betty’s journey over the last 12 months is an inspiring example of what can be achieved in a short period of time, even when the odds are stacked against you.

Her story offers us all some valuable lessons and insights into some of the factors that contribute to getting results fast.

When you are goal setting, on what basis are you choosing your goals?

The reason that this is an important question to be able to answer is because it is easy to make the mistake of setting goals based on the wrong criteria.

And this could cost you the results you really want to make happen.

What is this goal setting mistake?

Well, it is what I call ‘goal setting by menu.’

Imagine you have gone to a restaurant and the waiter presents you with the menu. You look at all the lovely options and think; ‘Oooo, I fancy a bit of that, followed by a load of this and finished off with a great big dollop of that.’

And this is often the approach people take when setting goals – just randomly picking something that has caught their attention that seems a good idea at the time.

You may be asking yourself ‘What is the problem with that if it is a goal that person is interested in?’

Well, the problem is this:

When you set goals in this random way, they are often not the goals that will deliver the the results you really want. This is because they are not chosen based on what you have identified is MOST important

You may well be slogging away at goals but they aren’t necessarily taking you any closer to what you really want to create. Goals just plucked at random is not a great strategy for designing the life and business that you really want.

How do you avoid this goal setting mistake?

Well, before you go about setting your goals do this first:

Create a compelling vision of what your ideal outcome looks like based on your core values. Make sure your goals are based on that.

That way you will know that the goals you are setting are the right ones for you. The goals that are MOST important. The goals that will deliver the results you really want and keep you on the path to achieving your vision for yourself and your business.

Important reminder: all goals aren’t equal. Your challenge is to make sure that you focusing on your most important goals. And you can’t do that if you are just selecting goals like you would select food from a menu.

So, what action do you need to take now, to avoid this goal setting mistake and make sure that your goals are driven by a vision that is based on your core values?

Would love to hear your views on this subject in the comments below.

Related posts:

• How to stay on track to achieve your goals
• 8 Reasons You Are Not Achieving Your Goals
• Quick Tip to help you Achieve Your Goals Faster and Easier

Why is this?

Well, many people are using their to-do list to manage day to day “noise.”

“What is wrong with that you?” you may ask.

Well, when you are mostly doing tasks that are driven by getting day to day noise nailed, you might well be getting stuff done, but it isn’t the stuff that will achieve your most important goals.

It is just like peddling a hamster wheel – you can peddle the wheel round as long and as fast as you like but you are still going nowhere. You aren’t moving forward. You stay stuck in a never ending rut.

So what is the solution to ensure that your to-do list isn’t killing your results? What needs to happen so that it is marching you forward to the results you really want to achieve in your life and business?

Well, the key is to ensure that the majority of the tasks on your to-do list, each and every day, are driven by your most important goals.

Take a look at your “to-do” list.

Are the majority of things on there the things that will move you forward to achieve your most important goals? Or are they things that will just keep you spinning the day to day hamster wheel?

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not saying ditch all the day to day stuff. What I am saying is make sure that the primary focus of your to-do list is to take the next steps to achieving your most important goals.

It is all about a shift in focus. It is the difference between being busy and being effective.

What action will you take to ensure your to-do list isn’t killing the results you really want to achieve?

The starting point is to make a commitment to yourself to stop tolerating the things that are making you feel overwhelmed.

The reason this is important, is because what you tolerate persists. Often we keep on tolerating the same old things week in week out, month in month out, year in year out. This creates feelings of overwhelm.

What do I mean by tolerations?

Well, it is all those things that need actioning but you never quite get round to. Things that have been bugging you for some time. Things that keep playing on your mind over and over.

It could be things like:

• weeks of admin that haven’t been done
• a backlog of house chores
• business struggling
• financial situation
• unhealthy relationships

All the things you tolerate contribute to feeling overwhelm – until you deal with them. They are not going to go away on their own. You have to take personal responsibility for getting them nailed.

But tolerating things doesn’t just make you feel overwhelmed. They are a huge energy drain. They suck the life out of you. They hold you back. They keep you stuck.

And not to mention the negative impact they have on things like quality of life, self esteem and motivation.

Here is a four step action plan to help you nail the things you tolerate and reduce your feelings of overwhelm:

Step 1 – Get really clear on what you are tolerating

Get a piece of paper. Split it into headings like business, home, relationships, finance and health. You might have headings of your own, specific to your life and circumstances. For each heading, write down as many things that you can think of that you are tolerating and/or causes you to feel overwhelmed.

Step 2 – Create a toleration and overwhelm busting action plan

Create an action plan to start getting these things nailed. Some items on your list will be things you can nail quite quickly and others might be bigger things that will take much longer. For the bigger items on your list, break them down into small, manageable chunks. Then start taking the first steps.

Step 3 – Create a system to stop the tolerations you nail raising their ugly heads again

Once you have nailed an item on your list, put a system in place to stop it becoming a problem in the future. For each item, ask yourself “what do I need to put in place to stop this happening again?” Remember, prevention is always better than cure.

Step 4 – Rinse and repeat

Doing this exercise once is not going to solve the problem permanently. Make this exercise part of your regular routine to help keep the overwhelm demons at bay.

Don’t underestimate how much the things you tolerate are contributing to your feeling overwhelmed.

Related post:

The Hidden Cause of Feeling Overwhelmed

He has played an important role throughout my life.

He drummed into me that life isn’t a dress rehearsal – that it is good to challenge the status quo and not to settle for mediocrity.

His influence and support over the years have helped me create positive changes in my life. He has been a role model for living life large and on your own terms.

I don’t know when, or if, I will see him again as me, my husband and son are in the final stages of preparing to move to Vancouver, Canada to live.

Spending time with this particular family member, and seeing the positive and inspiring way he is dealing with this curveball that life has thrown at him, is a reminder of the importance of grabbing life by the scruff of the neck, designing how you want it to be and taking action to make it so.

Designing life isn’t a new thing for me and my husband. It started as dawn broke on 1st January 2000.

We were sat on top of our favourite mountain watching the sun rising on a new millennium. In that moment, we made a pact to design the life we really wanted.

Our pact stemmed from a growing dissatisfaction with many areas of our life.

So we set out to design life on our own terms, based on what we value most and our own definition of success. Over the last twelve years, living and working by design has become a way of life, reaping benefits by the bucket load.

Here are 4 reasons to start designing your life as a matter of urgency:

1. You don’t know when life will suddenly throw you a curveball that will rob you of the opportunity to have the life you want with the people you want. (I wrote about this in more detail in Lessons from a Wake Up Call after my husband had a serious car crash in April 2011).

2. The pain of settling for what you don’t want is far more than the pain of creating change. Because the pain of staying stuck is endless. The pain of the change process is temporary.

3. A designed life is a fulfilling life – on so many different levels. A life lived by accident or by someone else’s definition of success is just gambling that it will all turn out OK. And that is a hell of a gamble to take with your one and only life.

4. Life is too short to settle for mediocrity (The philosophy me and my husband live and work by)

Don’t leave life to chance. Design it. Then find ways to turn it into reality because:

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than the ones you did. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” – Mark Twain

Related posts:

• Lessons from a Wake Up Call
• A Letter to Mediocrity

But there are things you can do that will help you minimise those feelings. Things that will not only help you achieve your goals faster and easier, but also enjoy the process too.

Here is one very simple but effective way that can really help:

Introduce a daily “feed the brain” session at the start of every day.

What I mean by “feed the brain” session is this:

To achieve your goals you have to do things like:

• Learn something new
• Improve a skill
• Know how to effectively deal with setbacks
• Deal with mindset issues like fear, feeling stuck, limiting beliefs, confidence etc.

If you start each and every day feeding your brain with stuff that will help you achieve your goals, you will speed up your progress. It also builds momentum. And harnessing the power of momentum is a great way to create an easier and faster route to achieving your goals.

Feeding your brain could be things like:

• Reading a motivational book
• Researching training courses to help you improve a skill
• Learning how to deal with an obstacle that is holding you back
• Doing positive mindset exercises to set you up to succeed

The trick to maximising the benefits of implementing “feeding the brain” is:

• Do it daily
• Do it first thing every day before you start your work

To start with, just experiment with doing 15 minutes. Once you experience the benefits, you might want to start doing a daily “power hour.”

Introduce a daily “power hour” by getting up an hour earlier than normal. For those of you horrified at the prospect of dragging yourself out of bed any earlier than you absolutely have to, I can tell you that the benefits are well worth it and it gradually becomes a habit – just part of your routine. (I am a raving fan of the daily power hour).

You can utilise your “power hour” in different ways. For example:

• Break the hour down into sections. Maybe 30 minutes reading something motivational followed by 30 minutes learning something new.
• Commit your “power hour” to one subject that would help you most at the moment.

Your “power hour” isn’t fixed and rigid. Adapt it to what would best serve your current focus areas, needs, challenges and goals . I highly recommend implementing a daily “feed the brain” session in some way, shape or form – there are so many benefits on so many different levels.

Committing to a daily “feed the brain” session is an effective way to help you build momentum to achieve your goals faster and easier.

Have fun playing with this.

What tips do you have for making achieving goals faster, easier and more enjoyable?

Here is a very simple, easy and effective method you can experiment with and implement straight away:

Allocate a set amount of time for every task you have to do.

The reason this is so effective is because:

With no set time to get a task done, often, tasks end up taking more time than they need to.

So if you allocate a set time to every task you are managing your tasks rather than your tasks managing you.

And this puts you in the driving seat to boost your productivity and improve your time management.

So, have a look at your to-do list for today. Make sure that it is in priority order. Then, for each task on the list give it a set amount of time you will nail it in.

At the start of each task set a timer going for the amount of time you have allocated to it. Remove all distractions. Focus on getting the task done in that time.

Experiment with doing this with everything – telephone calls, work tasks, house work, meetings, shopping etc.

It is also a very effective method to protect time for the really important stuff. For example, say you don’t feel you are spending enough quality time with the most important people in your life.

Set a time slot and commit to being fully present and focused on the quality of that time with those people. Don’t answer the phone. Switch the TV off. Disconnect from emails and social media. Remove all distractions.

This simple but effective approach will really help protect and enhance what is most important to you.

Allocating a set amount of time to every task really does work a treat with boosting productivity, improving time management and protecting the important things in life.

Give it a go. Let me know in the comments below how you get on with it. If you have a different method that you find works well for you, please share it in the comments below. It is always good to hear different things that work for different people.

Related articles:

• Busting the “I don’t have enough time” myth
• 10 Tips to Improve Productivity
• Are you being Busy or Productive?

Boy, was I glad I did. The concert blew me away. It was brilliant. I could see why his fans adored him. It is one of the best concerts I have ever been to.

You might be wondering what this has got to do with Small Business Owners. Well, there are a lot of useful lessons Small Business Owners could learn from Bruce Springsteen. Here are just a few:

1. He knows his audience. He knows that they want and he delivers it – consistently. Result? They keep buying. What can you do to increase your knowledge of what your audience really wants so you can meet their needs better?

2. He offers exceptional value for money. You come out of his concert feeling you had a fantastic return on your investment. This creates raving fans that stick with you. How could you improve the value your clients get from their investment in you?

3. He is totally engaged with his audience. Who wants to do business with someone who they don’t feel engaged with? Nobody. How could you improve the quality of your engagement with your audience?

4. He is real and authentic – this builds trust and connection. An audience that trusts and connects with you is an audience that is loyal. If you aren’t being real and authentic people can smell it a mile off – and it is a big turn off.

5. He is excellent at what he does. As a result he has credibility in his industry as well as with his audience. Credibility and excellence are a powerful combination. How will you improve yours?

6. He is unique. He stands out because he has his own style and his own approach. His uniqueness can’t be copied. What is unique about you that makes you stand out in your market?

7. He doesn’t try to appeal to everyone. Thinking your products are for everyone is the kiss of death for Small Business Owners. Focus on who you can best serve and serve them well.

8. His songs tell powerful stories that connect at an emotional level. People make buying decisions based on emotion. What do you need to do to make a deeper emotional connection with your audience?

9. He leaves them wanting more. So his fans come back time and time again. How can you improve your client’s experience of working with you so that they want to come back for more?

10. It is obvious he enjoys what he does and has fun with it. If you aren’t enjoying your business it shows – and it is big turn off. As Eckhart Tolle says “Life isn’t as serious as the mind makes it out to be.” And the same is true for business.

Useful business lessons aren’t always gained just from the business world. Have a look around you at the people you are a fan of – maybe a pop star, a world leader, someone in your community doing great things. What lessons can you learn from them to improve your business?