Chester Chronicle - And Finally

And Finally... German comedians named least funny (apparently)

Wed, 08 Jun 2011 08:49:19 +0000

Germans struggle to raise a titter and are the least funny nation in the world.

But Americans can make us laugh like drains and came top of a poll to find the funniest of 15 nationalities.

The verdict on the UK, lagging in seventh place, was "you're not as funny as you think". And certainly not as amusing as the Spanish, Italians, Brazilians, French or Mexicans, who all beat us.

The poll by social network site Badoo concluded that German comedians were the least amusing because they could not laugh at themselves. Their humour was often lost in translation.

But German stand-up Henning Wehn said people did not understand his country's love of slapstick, adding: "An old codger falling over or a cake in the face is always funny - even in a famine."

And Finally... Boy sells his kidney to buy an iPad

Mon, 06 Jun 2011 08:35:40 +0000

A DESPERATE teenager sold one of his kidneys... so he could buy the latest iPad.

The 17-year-old Chinese lad, identified only as Little Zheng, arranged the sale over the internet.

He told a local TV station he was prepared to risk almost anything to get his hands on the hi-tech gadget. But now he is seeking help after medical complications set in.

And Finally... Ants found living inside girl's ears

Tue, 31 May 2011 08:42:03 +0000

DOCTORS have found almost 30 ants living in the ears of a teenage girl who loved snacking in bed.

Fallen crumbs from the 16-year-old's night-time treats tempted the insects into nesting in her ears.

Medics found six in her left ear and more than 20 in her right after she went to a hospital in Taiwan with pain and itching.

The ants were successfully removed and doctors said she was lucky to have no permanent damage. They also told her to stop eating in bed.

And Finally... Penguin gets a wetsuit

Fri, 27 May 2011 11:45:45 +0000

A balding African penguin in San Francisco has been given a helping flipper. His keepers have created a mini wetsuit for him.

And Finally... People have double the amount of online friends than real life ones

Mon, 09 May 2011 09:08:47 +0000

The average person has double the amount of online friends than physical ones, a study has revealed.

And people tend to be more open, confident and honest with their virtual friends than their "real" counterparts.

The study, commissioned by the Cystic Fibrosis Trust shows that people typically have 121 online friends compared with 55 physical friends.

And Finally... First toasted beef burger to go on sale

Tue, 03 May 2011 11:19:44 +0000

A ÂBURGER that can be popped in a toaster to cook is about to hit supermarket shelves.

Tillman's Toast Me! Âburgers can be put into the toaster straight from the freezer.

The German meat firm's UK boss Jon Gymer claimed: "There's nothing else like it out there at the moment."

Packs of two, costing Âbetween Â£1.39 and Â£1.59, are due to be sold by Tesco later this month.

And Finally... Fat families to be given lessons on how to shop for food in supermarkets

Tue, 26 Apr 2011 09:56:34 +0000

GETTING obese families to ditch junk food is often a losing battle for doctors.

Now officials have decided to try something new - by taking them round supermarkets to learn how to buy healthier food.

Adults living with overweight children in deprived areas are being offered a free 10-week course on nutrition and better eating.

And Finally... "Royal" couple both boys (apparently)

Tue, 19 Apr 2011 09:39:58 +0000

CHESTER Zoo's pair of royal starlings - called William and Kate in honour of Prince William and Kate Middleton - have been renamed after keepers discovered both are male.

The birds, hand reared at the zoo, were named after the royal couple to mark their engagement in November - as their natural habitat is in east Africa near to where Prince William proposed in Kenya.

However, keepers have now discovered the pair are in fact of the same sex - forcing a name change to Billy and Nate.

"Royal starlings are very difficult to sex when they are young," said Andy Woolham, team leader of parrots and penguins at Chester Zoo.

And Finally... 36-week-old foetus threatened with Asbo

Wed, 13 Apr 2011 09:41:58 +0000

LEARNING good behaviour can never start too early for any child.

But Charlotte Childs was stunned to receive a letter from police threatening an Asbo - for her unborn child.

Pregnant Charlotte, 33, was invited to attend a meeting to discuss her naughty son.

And Finally... The brilliant twin babies chatting (video)

Tue, 05 Apr 2011 09:30:46 +0000

Here's a fantastic video that's big on Youtube - the twin babies talking....

And Finally... Cars to be made from bananas and pineapples (apparently)

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 14:58:03 +0000

BANANAS and pineapples could be the secret ingredient for a greener car.

Fibres from their leaves and stems are being used to create a new generation of tough automotive plastics.

Scientists say they could be used in car bodies and engines in just two years.

Dr Alcides Leao, of Sao Paulo State University in Brazil, said: "Their properties are incredible. They are 30% lighter and up to four times stronger than regular plastic."

Manufacturers are already testing the material.

And Finally... 34 million hits for Rebecca Black's song branded 'worst tune ever recorded'

Tue, 22 Mar 2011 09:15:30 +0000

A SONG by a girl of 13 has become a web sensation after it was branded the worst tune ever recorded.

Rebecca Black's pop song, Friday, has racked up more than 29 million views on YouTube.

But critics have slammed the lyrics and the video.

Part of the chorus goes: "Yesterday was Thursday Thursday, today it is Friday Friday, gotta get down to the bus stop, gotta get my bus, I see my friends."

The song was produced by Los Angeles-based Ark Music Factory, which says its goal is to discover future No1 stars.

But Rebecca, from California, may have the last laugh as her song is now on iTunes and is climbing the charts.

And Finally... Wireless stamp invented. Whatever next - an electronic letter? Oh, wait...

Wed, 16 Mar 2011 10:02:24 +0000

Scandanavian techies have developed a way of buying stamps for letters through text messaging.

Whatever next??!?

Full story at www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-12703744

And Finally... 7 billion people - Are you typical? (video)

Tue, 08 Mar 2011 09:38:23 +0000

Here's a great little video from National Geographic worth sharing...

And Finally... Smoker will have to pay his neighbours Â£1,200 every time they smell his smoke in their home

Tue, 01 Mar 2011 09:14:34 +0000

A SMOKER must pay Â£1,200 every time he puffs on a cigar in his flat if his neighbours can smell it.

Russell and Amanda Poses said the "foul odours" waft through the window from an apartment below.

Harry Lysons, in his 70s, agreed to Manhattan supreme court's ruling.

His lawyer said: "He'll have them on the street."