Over the last month or so since I’ve launched this blog, I’ve been annoying everyone who was reading with my stories on how SCARED I am to quit my job. No, I’m wrong, I was scared to have a conversation with my manager about my decision. I knew it all the way: the decision was easy (well, kind of), and it was right; it’s the requirement to tell those in charge about it that was making me so nervous.

I just hate confrontations of any kind (I’m the kind of person who finds it difficult to say “no”), and that’s what made it so damn difficult for me.

But I’ve gathered my courage, asked for a meeting and it was it. I’ll be free to do whatever I please in about 3 weeks time. There’s a whole back story to it – my boss threw me a (pleasant) surprise, but I can’t talk about it right now for a number of reasons.

I feel relaxed and ready to go ahead with my business. And I have a ton of new ideas – including ones for this blog. But it is why I am putting it on hiatus – for now.

When I launched it, I needed a place to vent my fears and frustrations. Although I didn’t publish much of my writing, it certainly helped me to get my act together, and the simple fact that there’s someone reading it made it easier for me to commit to my decision. Now, when I’m about to launch into my new business, I fear that I won’t have much time to devote to any other projects. Also, I don’t like to hide behind a mask and want everything to be very transparent – which I can’t realistically do with this blog right now.

So, this blog goes on hiatus. When I’m ready, I’ll revisit my ideas and relaunch it with some new exciting content, but the subject will stay the same: quitting your day job, doing what you love, going out of your comfort zone, conquering your fears and just doing it.

Until then – best of luck to you!

I’ve stumbled upon this video where two awesome photographers Dane Sanders and Gabriel Ryan have a chat about quitting your day job to start your photography business. Have a look!

So here it goes. I am still scared. My heart sinks every time I think of it.

I imagine how I will ask my manager to talk to him for a minute next Monday (yep, I want to do it then… well, maybe Tuesday), and then imagine how we’ll go into a meeting room, sit down, have some obligatory chit-chat and then I’ll break the news… and my heart sinks.

And I just don’t know why. During these last few days I’ve been buried in my new business-related work. It’s a lot of work, and I feel frustrated at times, but it still feels very exciting and I am totally absorbed by it! And then… this fear I don’t want to be feeling.

It’s not the fear of leaving as such – I am very excited about that. It’s the fear of having the conversation. And I couldn’t put my finger on why I would be feeling that way.

So I googled for advice. The search turned up Penelope Trunk’s very old blog post which explained exactly why people might feel like that before they announce their departure at work. Turns out, it’s all to do with assertiveness (which I am often struggling with) and – most importantly – shifting the balance of power from your boss telling you what to do to you telling them what you are going to do.

I’ve already been in a similar situation a few months ago. I asked for a meeting and told my boss I can no longer lend my equipment to the company without being compensated for it. It was a fair request, but it was hard work coming up with courage to ask for it (it took me MONTHS!). But I’ve done it and got my compensation (could’ve gotten more… but was too scared to ask for more… scared of the questioning and having to explain every single pound I was requesting).

So okay. Assertiveness and power shifts. Explains it.

Now how am I going to get over it? I googled some more and read other people’s stories about experiencing the same sort of fear mixed with hesitation when they approach telling their boss they are leaving.

One theme that repeated itself in all those stories was people feeling very loyal to the company (or to their boss). Being loyal makes it so much harder to leave. I am pretty loyal too (despite being paid peanuts for saving the company thousands of pounds… but that’s not the point). I’ve learnt a lot since I’ve joined, they’ve been pretty supportive of my desire to do what I like and not to do what I don’t. I am constantly thinking that they won’t be able to find a replacement who would be able to do as much for the money offered.

But the question is: would the company be as loyal to me had they decided it was time to let me go? Or if they needed to make my position redundant? Whatever loyalty they may feel, business is business and business decisions often have no place for loyalty.

So I need to start thinking as a business person. What is in the best interests of my business – that is, myself? Is it to stay (and annoy my friends for another 10 years about not being paid what I am worth and dreaming of having my own business) or is it to go?

A recent example: one of our pretty valuable members of the team just left to work for a competitor (well, kinda). He was loyal to the company since the very beginning, in 2001. And yet he didn’t hesitate to leave when he decided he didn’t like it anymore. Why should I?

So my answer is: to go. That’s my business decision. No hard feelings. The best thing I can do is to offer to come in on a freelance basis every now and again (but not every week) if they are struggling. Good for me, good for them (well, better if I just told them to sod off).

Now with that in mind, where’s my Paul McKenna’s Instant Confidence CD?

I had it hammered into my head for the last two or three months or so: be niche. Do one thing and one thing only. Be THE authority on that one little thing that you do, and you will not regret it.

And I would totally agree and would sniff at people who said they were doing “corporate, product, wedding, portrait and landscape photography” because they were totally missing the point, weren’t they?

And yet what did I do myself? I did exactly what they did, maybe on a slightly smaller scale.

I mean, I decided quite early on I won’t photograph weddings, because I don’t think I can handle them alone and produce results I’d be proud of every time. So I said I’m going to be a portrait photographer. And then I added headshots on top of that (because well, lets face it, headshots is something people need all the time and I’m good at headshots). And portrait photographer surely involves babies and children and couples and maternity and what not. And then maybe I’d do couple of weddings as well, but they’ll have to be small weddings. Because I mean people get married all the time, it’s so much easier to get people spend on their wedding photography than it is on their family photoraphy. And of course there’s Trash The Dress and Engagement Sessions opportunities that I will be missing by not doing weddings. So I said okay, I’ll say I’ll do small weddings and limited number of them per year.

And it’s like I do everything now.

Not good.

So… I’ve been listening to a couple of interviews from More Buyers Mastermind (which I bought when it first came out, but it kinda slipped my mind as I never received an email saying it’s now live, but luckily I was reminded of it yesterday) with Naomi Dunford and Pam Slim… And yeah, it’s all cool and again they were hammering their point home: you have got to be niche if you want to succeed.

But I heard it all before, so I was like “yes of course I need to do niche” but it hasn’t really clicked.

But you know what did it to me? Discovering – by pure accident – Kiss Books. Their simplicity and their philosophy has blown me away. They have shamelessly reproduced Apple’s website design, but I don’t care, because Apple is a good thing to copy. And they have this “Simple is hot” strapline which is just PERFECT. And I am yet to even come close to ordering one of their books, but I’m head over heels in love, and I have this amazing feeling about them that I would love my future clients to feel when they come across my website.

So I wrote on my brainstorming wall: SIMPLE in really big red letters and had listed lots of things that should be simple about my business. And then as I was cooking my soup, it suddenly hit me and rushed back to the room and wrote: “Simple = Do one thing” and kind of scribbled what could potentially become my niche.

Or I will freak out again and go back to being jack-of-all-trades.

But I hope I won’t.

So here it goes. Months of reading the same old advice and ignoring it. And then when you see a really good implementation of this advice in your industry it finally does the trick.

Oh, and if you’re celebrating today – Happy Christmas everyone!

P.S. My brilliant brainstorming wall is Magic Whiteboard if anyone’s wondering. Really brilliant thing and a great example of being VERY niche.

So, the BUSINESS PLAN. The scary monster. Something I’ve been dreading and delaying for months and months. I’ve been looking around, downloading some samples and giving up as I couldn’t quite put my ideas into any sort of structured document.

I told myself that despite everyone saying that you have to have a business plan, I don’t need it. I’ll just go with the flow. (I did realise it was a stupid decision, but I couldn’t help myself).

But completing on our house purchase last week (YAY!) got me thinking about money and whether leaving my job is such a great idea afterall, with all the expenses & bills that are coming in now.

Then I told myself that I’ve decided to do that and that I’ll stick to my plan.

So then the business plan and financial plan and marketing plan issues resurfaced again. And then (today!) I stumbled upon the Right-Brain Business Plan which sounded like fun and I bought the PDF instantly (at $19.99 – about £13 – a steal!). It’s short and sweet and I was able to read it all in just about 10 minutes.

The actual (creative and fun!) work will require more time, of course, but I’m already inspired. As a side effect, it immediately got me thinking about my new office space and how I should arrange it. I started thinking how I can display the business plan on my wall and how I could order some beautiful milestone calendars to keep me focused – and inspired. And, and… My right brain is now flooded with emotions and ideas and all other cool stuff the left brain just can’t cope with.

It is such a relief to realise that you don’t have to have a 40 page boring document with aims and objectives and a scary PLAN. It’s great to know you can be creative in your business plan, too.

So I’m going to be working on my new  RBBP over the Christmas holidays and then I’ll share what I’ve come up with. Ooh I’m so looking forward to it!

Are you planning to use Right-Brain Business Plan to come up with your roadmap to success? If so, do share what you come up with – it’d be fun to compare results and share inspiration!

I had a pretty rocky couple of weeks.

I already mentioned that my husband and I are about to buy our first home. And as any house buyer (or seller) will tell you, that’s a pretty nerve-wracking and often frustrating process. It starts from the moment you walk into the property you like right until the completion date, or probably even further.

And who makes this whole thing that incredibly stressful? Your solicitor. The one you pay shitloads of money to, and who doesn’t seem to be doing anything but being on the phone all the time and not answering any question straight. Well yes, there are other things that make house-buying stressful, those probably account for 1 per cent of the whole amount of stress you go through.

Ask anyone who ever bought a property how they found dealing with their solicitor, and 99.9% of people will tell you it was awful, horrible, frustrating. And it’s not about whether solicitors actually do their job or not – because they clearly do something as many people actually end up buying properties – it’s about the perception they create in their clients’ minds of how they do it.

Tell me who in their right mind will ignore phonecalls from their clients, fail to explain how their service works – in plain English, forget to consult with a client on issues that can delay the process, and just generally not care whether their client is happy or not? No one but the solicitor.

For a second, let me go Seth Godin style. Imagine there was a solicitor firm in town, who would go down to their customer level, and would explain everything in a simple language; a firm that would send weekly (and as it gets closer to completion – daily) updates to their customers on how their sale was proceeding and what still needs to be done. The firm where the customer could call in with any stupid question and get a simple, straightforward answer without feeling incredibly stupid about it.

Bet you – given that this firm has solicitors as qualified as anyone else – that firm would kill all the competition: the very first customer would have told everyone they know how easy they were to deal with.

I’m going to end it now. But I’m working on a post with some anti-advice on how to deal with your customers. Stuff like “let your secretary deal with them” kind of thing. You are welcome to share your stories!

In no particular order, these are the top 6 blogs that I follow. There are more, of course, but these are the ones that had the most impact on me.

I have to say, I got frustrated at one point when I kept discovering more and more inspirational blogs and people who ran them, but didn’t have enough hours in a day to read everything they had to say. After about a month of having zillions of tabs open in my browser and reading everything I came across, I am now content that I don’t need to read every single thing everyone writes (although I’d love to if I could!).

Zen Habits

Zen Habits is about finding simplicity in the daily chaos of our lives. It’s about clearing the clutter so we can focus on what’s important, create something amazing, find happiness.

Fearless Endeavours

Nate’s mission is to help us – and himself – to overcome our fears in everyday life. Open up to the possibility of actively experiencing life instead of passively watching it go by.  To treat life as an experiment. Live uncomfortably. Face your fears head on and ruthlessly strive to overcome them.

Self Made Chick

Christine has made a wonderful change from working 12 hour days in the office to staying at home and making a living through passive income. Something that I aspire to achieve in a few years time, alongside my photography.

Simple Dollar

Financial talk for the rest of us and simple, straightforward strategies to follow if you want to fix your finances and live the life you want. I have recently started working through Trent’s “31 days to fix your finances” workbook (admittedly, it is taking me longer that 31 days as I’m not doing a chapter each day), and it has already helped me realise what’s really important in my life and what’s not.

Escape from Cubicle Nation

A seasoned coach and writer, Pamela helps frustrated employees in corporate jobs break out and start their own business. Escape from Cubicle Nation is one of the top career and marketing blogs on the web – and that’s most likely the reason it was the first blog I discovered when looking for some advice and inspiration when trying to decide whether to quit my job or not.

The Art of Non-Conformity

The Art of Non-Conformity is a blog full of unconventional strategies for life, work and travel. Chris writes about not having to life your life the way other people expect you to. He convinces you that work can be meaningful and fun. And he travels! Boy, he travels! That’s my other deep buried ambition – to travel the world and to photograph what I see.

One more inspiration – but she doesn’t have a blog (although she really should!)

There’s one person who was the first to inspire me and get me thinking. My friend Irina, who I don’t keep in touch with as often as I should, went off travelling with her husband a few years ago, with a goal of crossing the Pacific (they’ve done the Atlantic a few years before that) and coming back to Europe to live “properly” and have “proper” jobs. It’s been about 3 years now – she is still hopping from one Pacific island to another, and I’m never quite sure where she is. And they now have a baby-boy. And a little hut they call home. They don’t have loads of money and you bet it’s not easy living. But they don’t look back.

Now that’s most inspirational.

After yesterdays’ post on kicks in the butt I got stuck again. I have my pricing figured out, and the discount strategy to build my portfolio and get some new clients thought through (well, kinda… I can’t really think things through properly. I had a go at putting together a business and a marketing plan, but guess I just prefer to go with the flow. Anyway, I digress)… So I wrote a post about my new fantastic discount, and prepared a nice graphic to go with it, and reviewed it like 10 times, because I wanted to make sure the wording is right, and so on.

And I still can’t press that damn publish button. It’s not the perfection thing this time round. It’s the fear I’ll get loads of enquiries (oh, drama, drama! how awful that would be) and won’t be able to deal with them as I’m still working full-time and will be moving house in a couple of weeks. And I also don’t want to shout about it too much in case someone from work will hear (kind of thinking having pricing on my website is one thing; actively trying to push something is quite another).

Oh, decisions, decisions. That’s why I like everything straightforward, honest, in your face, tell-me-like-it-is-and-lets-not-play-silly-games.

Maybe I should sleep on it.

Kicks in the butt every now and again are pretty important. I had three in the last two days.

First one was finally finishing (devouring, rather) the Pastry School by photographer Alicia Caine, which finally made me stop obsessing about releasing my photography pricing and just get on with it and put it up there on my website. A very good but gentle kick in the butt it was. It made me realise that it’s okay to change prices once in a while, or maybe even quite often. That if I don’t try this pricing out I will never know whether it’s right or not, and won’t be able to grow.

The second one came yesterday, over a rather unpleasant house-buying drama. I won’t go into too much detail, but due to lack of communication between all parties (myself included, but I blame my solicitor and the estate agents more than others) we have had over 2 weeks delay in the buying process, an unhappy vendor on the brink of withdrawing from the sale, and me realising that if I don’t start acting (and kicking somebody else’s ass, too) we might just loose the house it took us a year to find. A very useful kick in the butt, but I’d rather I didn’t get it.

The last kick up the backside came today, as I was on the train home and reading Ali Hale’s of Aliventures post on being consistent. The post is quite insightful and, no doubt, useful, but it wasn’t the consistency bit of it that got me moving. It was the last paragraph about people quitting their diets because they are too perfectionist:

Many dieters feel that if they’re not 100% consistent, they might as well give up. In fact, one large meal or one day of over-indulgence isn’t what causes 95% of diets to fail … it’s the perfectionist attitude which says, “I’ve failed, I might as well give up now.”

And it finally hit me: I realised than that I am too bloody perfectionist when I don’t really need to be. I will obsess with something for very long, and then decide it’s not quite right, and will delay finishing it and releasing it to the world for days and weeks… until it finally becomes irrelevant. Same with writing, same with editing photographs.

I mean, I know I am perfectionist, and I know it’s not necessarily a good thing, but you know how it happens when you needed just that final drop for something to dawn on you?

I have got 3 draft blog posts saved for this blog. I couldn’t post them because I felt they were not quite there yet, not quite perfect for me to release them to my huge audience (hello you four two, by the way!).  I don’t post on my photography blog often enough: I didn’t have any new photography sessions recently, and I don’t want to post the old stuff… so I don’t post anything.

And that’s not helping anyone. It’s not helping me, and it not helping others to find me.

So I am thankful for those three. And I am sure as hell I will need more to truly progress. But guess what? I know I’ll handle it!

Photo credit: BrittneyBush

I read it everywhere: when you just start a blog or launch a website, you obsess about the stats. You check them daily (if not hourly) as if by some sort of magic people will start appearing on your blog, and subscribing to your posts.

I thought it was a joke until I launched into blogging.

I’ve got 4 subscribers on this blog and 6 on my photography blog.
I check them daily. I also check every single page view.

I get upset, because yesterday I had 7 subscribers on my photography blog, and clearly someone didn’t like my latest post.

I also procrastinate a lot and think about what I’m going to write about and how I am going to write about it waaaay too much.

How bonkers is that?