No...Really - It's Like 9th Grade Math Class, Only Funnier (and with more art). No, Really.

It's only a lie if it isn't the truth...

2012-02-17T14:15:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Lately, my 3 year old daughter's tiny dolls have been participating in an all nude revue of some sort -- the whereabouts of their clothes unknown. Until now. As I was sorting the darks from the lights in the laundry hamper, I came across these... Lord knows being a doll is a dirty job, what with being carted here and there by chubby strawberry jam covered hands.

From Russia with love (this explains everything).

2012-02-14T14:58:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater A quick peek at my blog statistics this morning revealed the real reason I've been receiving so many emails from Russia, addressed to сексуальная женщина*. Meanwhile, I thought about including a photo of a Russian sex doll race featuring air-filled women, (a couple of plastic men) and one anatomically incorrect crocodile. But instead, I thought this might be more

Trust me - I'm an artist (no, really)

2012-02-08T08:34:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater For those of you who don't know, I am an artist. No, really. I am. I make art. I even went to school to learn how to do it. Make art I mean. Paintings, sculptures, that sort of thing. Not that I have been doing it lately. Making art I mean. Mostly because my workspace for the past several months has consisted of a 4" square area on the corner of a dining room table -

Oh crap, that's no elephant...

2012-02-07T08:22:00.004-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater We are moving soon and so, the cleanup has begun. As I was sorting through some of my daughter's toys yesterday, I came across one I had forgotten about. It was covered in dust bunnies - after having lived under the bed for quite some time - but it still looked perky as ever... Geoff, Jan, Jannique and I were at a train station somewhere in The Netherlands,

Week in Review - 02/02/12

2012-02-02T12:58:00.000-04:00

When you are a stay at home (work at home) mom like I am, one day really blends into the next. Tuesday might be Sunday and Saturday could be Monday. This is why My Week in Review is coming to you today - on a Friday. Or is it Thursday? Nevermind. You decide. AndreaMulderSlater.com (you are here) What would Mary pin? And then, there was drywall... What's that up your nose? Oh nothing,

What would Mary pin?

2012-02-01T14:09:00.000-04:00

Once upon a time, a guy named Ben and his friend Paul had an idea. They thought it would be phenomenal if there was a place where people could create and share virtual catalogs or bulletin boards of things they like, with strangers. From that thought, came a little social networking website called Pinterest. It's like a birth story, only with a lot less goo. Trouble is - not everyone "gets it

And then, there was drywall...

2012-01-30T17:01:00.002-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater No, really.

What's that up your nose? Oh nothing, it's just a bluebird - of happiness...

2012-01-27T08:34:00.003-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Something occurred to me recently. I'm a fan of Dave Barry. Well, actually, I've known this for a while. When I was a kid, it was a family tradition to pick up the national newspaper on Saturday, find the Dave Barry column, sit down with a giant cup of acidic coffee and a cigarette, and listen to my dad read the words that made him laugh so hard his eyes would fill

Word Filled Wednesday

2012-01-25T11:54:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater No, really.

Sundays are for snow or sand... whichever.

2012-01-22T15:23:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater What do you do when you can't get to a warm, sandy beach - y'know, because it's the middle of winter? Easy. You go to the home improvement store and mess with their displays. Or, you just give in and brave the cold. Either way... No, really.

My quiet sucks

2012-01-20T08:24:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Geoff was up well before daylight today. The basement floor was poured at the new house two nights ago, and warmth from the fireplace heat dump is required to help it set up. So he drove out to put another bunch of logs on the fire. For the record, I dislike the word "dump" immensely. Growing up, "dump" had a very specific meaning and I can't shake the connotation. I'm

People... as seen by a 3 year old

2012-01-18T21:05:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Yesterday, Jannique announced that she was going to draw a girl. Next, she drew a boy. Then she drew the entire family. Later... a village. And just like that - she is drawing people. Every person is drawn the same way, with the same proclamation, "A head, and two eyes. Some hair. And some legs!!!!" The drawings are always followed immediately by a happy

Week in Review - 01/16/12

2012-01-16T13:40:00.003-04:00

I realize it might seem strange to do a week in review at the beginning of the week, but for some reason, I've been easily distracted lately and therefore I'm all mixed up - and falling behind. For example, I just spent far too much time on a sports website, trying to catch a glimpse of a friend of mine who was caught by the camera in the stands at a hockey game. The thing is, I could have

That is one badass farm

2012-01-15T13:01:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater My daughter is crazy about tiny plastic toys. It’s an obsession that began just after she turned 2 years old. I blame the owners of Sundog Books in Seaside, Florida for getting her hooked. That’s where she first saw them... a large round basket full of 'em. We're talking a massive collection of dogs, cats, birds, snakes, bees and beyond - designed to keep the kids

Calcium pills should never be swallowed at night

2012-01-11T09:56:00.001-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Lately, between the full moon, Tim Roth and the endless stream of creative thoughts and dark imaginings that regularly occupy my mind, sleeping has been near impossible. For more than a week I've been working on five or six hours at best - when I'm lucky. This wouldn't be an issue except for the fact that when I get less than eight to thirteen hours of rest a night, I

Damn you Tim Roth. Damn you.

2012-01-08T21:29:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Tim Roth has taken over my life. It all began at the holidays when I noticed Geoff making frequent retreats to the bedroom with his laptop and a set of headphones. Me: Um, what are you watching? Geoff: Lie to me. Me: I’m pregnant. Geoff: WHAT?! Me: You said I should lie to you. Geoff: Well played. Turns out that while searching for a Tim Roth

That awkward moment when you realize you're old. And crispy.

2012-01-05T12:27:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Something dreadful happened to me in bed this morning. I woke up, turned over and stretched – like I always do. That’s when it occurred… A pain shot from my right ear, down my neck and straight through to my shoulder blade. Even now, after having downed a painkiller (or two), I still can’t turn my head more than an inch, or look down at my feet without

Most Read Posts of 2011

2012-01-02T08:40:00.001-04:00

Follow my blog with Bloglovin by Andrea Mulder-Slater Now that it's the second day of the new year, I figure it's safe to start reminiscing a bit. With that thought, comes a list - and a craving for a latte. An large egg nog latte. And maybe a bag of salt and vinegar chips. So much for resolutions. Here are the 11 most read posts of 2011 (written in 2011)... The Social Net Worth I'm such a (

Week in Review 12/31/11

2011-12-31T17:17:00.003-04:00

Here's what happened this week - online only, not in the real world. My life isn't an open book. No, really. I redesigned our Mulder Slater website and successfully removed the "web site design company" vibe. Now it's simply a place to go when you want to find out what we Mulder Slaters are doing. That is, if it matters to you. http://mulderslater.com/ Meanwhile... Jarea Art

All is Calm, All is Bright

2011-12-27T08:16:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Christmas morning came with no immediate sign of the littlest one who slept in while Geoff, Jan and I enjoyed a quiet cup of coffee next to the child-decorated tree. When Jannique awoke, we discovered why the delay. She got my cold for Christmas. Poor kid. Still, she was game once she saw the presents waiting for her beneath the tree. How ironic that she had asked

Three Little Coffee Charms Sitting in a Row

2011-12-23T08:17:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater This Christmas, I created some coffee charms for a good friend of mine. He is a potter and so I used images of his work as the inspiration for three tiny coffee & ink paintings. I slipped two of them into fridge magnet frames and made the other one into a key-chain. He was pleased - especially when he recognized the work as his own. Thought I would share them with you...

There's a search engine developer in my bedroom

2011-12-22T12:04:00.002-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater Geoff and I were watching Two and a Half Men on the laptop the other night. Well, we were planning to watch it but it was a rerun - which was incredibly disappointing, even though we're not completely sure we even like watching someone as pretty as Ashton Kutcher for more than 5 minutes at a time. But that's not the point. The reality was that Geoff and I were in bed

For the love of God, don't mess with the Particle

2011-12-14T09:50:00.000-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater I woke up to see Geoff staring at me. He asked me what time it was. I contemplated poking his eyes out but instead got up to go the bathroom, glancing at the clock radio as I walked by. Four twenty four. Geoff: That’s it? It’s so bright out. He was right. Our bedroom was filled with light. I pushed the blinds away and peered through the glass. It was

Slam that door again and the moose is coming for you

2011-12-09T14:24:00.001-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater I need to kill Geoff. I do. It's getting out of control -- and by "it" I mean his nighttime bathroom door slamming habit. It's the little things. He's always been a door slammer. I knew it when I married him but I suppose, like most idealistic wives, I ignored the problem and hoped that it would just go away. It didn't. During the day, I really couldn't care less if

Make it stop...

2011-12-09T14:14:00.001-04:00

by Andrea Mulder-Slater If the staff at the Hotel Napoleon knew what Geoff and I were doing in their Junior suite at midnight, they would have had a conniption fit. Have I got your attention yet? Good. For more, you'll just have to read the latest Witty Glitter blog post. Here's the link: http://wittyglitter.blogspot.com/2011/12/lights-and-pillows-of-paris.html No, really.