We got the call almost a year and a half ago.  Emily on the other line, "PLEASE PRAY FOR MARIA!!" she screamed and hung up almost as fast as I could say hello. 

We had no idea what was going on, but we gathered our staff together, and began to pray.  "God, whatever is going on, please be with the Chapman family.  We don't know how to pray, but we know you're watching."

The next cal from Emily "Maria is dead." and the silent sobbing began.

You know when tragedy strikes, and you don't know what to say, or how to comfort?  All we knew to do was buy a plane ticket to Nashville, and hug a lot of people. 

So Jamie Jo and I did what any other friend would do, we traveled all the way across the country, un-prepared for the darkness hanging over the church, the family, and all the friends who came to give their final respects to a little girl adopted from China, with so much life yet to live.

We wept a lot.
We hugged even more.
And our hearts were just so incredibly sad.

Maria Sue Chapman died at 6 years old, on a warm spring day in May, 2008.

I continue to watch a family deal with the loss of a child.  I can't even begin to imagine the waves of sadness that continue to pound at the heart of these wonderful people.  But one thing I know, Steven and Mary Beth are 100% committed to the faith they proclaim.  They're the real deal! 

They've traveled a road that you never find and end, at least on this side.
But they show the world their faith remains.
They ask hard questions about why, when, and what if.
But they continue to call God their rock and their refuge.
They profess a faith that challenges every day existence.
And, they live it, most notably by writing some of the best music I've heard from Steven in a long time.

I've been an SCC fan since I was in High School, but this album is the culmination of a desperate father, a husband longing to find answers, and the knowledge of a faith that will someday, on his journey,  rise to Beauty!

You won't be disappointed.
Get over to iTunes and download this wonderful masterpiece outlining the Journey of one man to find the answers to life's hardest answers. 

May we all be courageous enough to drill deep into the heart of our faith.
May we understand God's ultimate reconciliation of the world.
But for now...may we be a people who can mourn for our friends loss, celebrate with them in those times of triumph, and allow them the time to heal as God would heal.

We're praying for you guys today here at andybraner.com, and we believe, as you've recorded so well, BEAUTY WILL RISE!

And the stories keep coming in of people PAYING IT FORWARD. 

My best buddy in college just sent me this link to his son's company, Noah's Mugs.  (http://www.wfaa.com/video/?nvid=411302&shu=1)

If you go to the link, you'll see the video of Noah (7 years old) who had a passion to start a business making coffee mugs.  Each coffee mug is sold for $16, and 100% of the revenue goes to provide drinking water to a ministry they work for in Africa.

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is happening!!

There is a movement continuing to go forward as people see their contribution to this world is bigger than themselves.  Led by a 10 year old girl selling lemonade, and a 7 year old boy making coffee mugs, SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TODAY?

What are you going to do to Pay it Forward for someone in your community.

Maybe it's just going to buy a mug from Noah (http://www.noahsmugs.com), and maybe it's something that you can do, and be highlighted here.

It's kind of like that game back in grade school on the playground.  Let's keep it rolling.  Let's keep the ball up in the air.  Let's see how long we can go with stories from around the country, and around the world that keep us with the right mindset over the holidays. 

Pay it forward for the holidays is already beginning.  I just got a message from a guy who told me about a little girl setting up a lemonade stand.  She saw a video at a church of a little orphan living in poverty.  She set up a lemonade stand for 25 cents a cup, and over the course of a weekend, she raised $1200.00. 

SHE IS 10 years old. 

So you can see.  It's already beginning.  Those who are interested, send your stories in to andy@campkivu.com.  I'd love to highlight how our communities are coming together. 

If you tuned into the radio station yesterday at castlerock radio, you heard Ryan and I talking about the concept of Pay it Forward.

The Story started when Ryan told of a person in line at a fast food drive through.  They decided they were going to pay for their meal, AND the meal of the car behind them.  The restaurant reported that the giving continued for the next 42 cars.  Isn't that awesome!!

So, here on andybraner.com, we're going to highlight some Pay it Forward stories. 

If you have an example of someone that is reaching out to someone in their community, on their own, then send it to me at andy@campkivu.com.

I'll highlight you and your story here on the blog, and we'll get you a spot LIVE on the radio show Thursdays, or Fridays, until Christmas. 

Let's get to it, and PAY IT FORWARD!!

(if you want to hear the archived radio show from today, be sure to check it out on iTunes under the KORKAST netowrk, Ryan Dobson, and CastleRock Radio.)

Remember playing on the playground? 

Remember when the ills of life just slipped into a world where all things were negotiated with a kickball, monkey bars, and a bag of nutter butters?

It was a life much simpler than mortgages, insurance payments, and health insurance.  We didn't worry about politics, well; most of us didn't worry.  The beauty of the simple life was faith that all things would be taken care of. 

We didn't worry about food.
We didn't worry about clothes.
It was who could go fastest on the merry-go-round.
Who got picked to play in the recess kickball tournament.
And how fast could you chase the girl with the pig tails in her hair.

Ahhhhh, the simple life.

Right after Jesus spoke of the consequence of divorce in Matthew, the very next section describes when the people brought children to Jesus to be prayed for.

Then little children were brought to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked those who brought them.Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." When he had placed his hands on them, he went on from there. (Matthew 19:13-15)

Isn't it interesting? The king of the universe has likened His kingdom to children. 

It wasn't the greatest minds.
It wasn't the most athletic.
It wasn't the warriors or the politicians.

It was the children.

The children who come full of faith that life can be simple, yes; it's the simplicity of a child like relationship which causes Jesus' heart to move. 

My prayer today...

May I have a childlike faith that will resist the temptation of the world to be busy, or filled with incomprehensible worldly things. 

May I focus on the things God wants. 
May I spend time on the things He spends time on.

As I've been dealing with teenagers for almost 15 years now, one issue continues to rise to the surface without fail... Divorce.

I would be willing to say 90% of all the kids who end up causing some sort of trouble in school, at church, in sports, or even out here at camp; come from some sort of dysfunctional family, and most often; a divorced home. 

And Here me say, "That's ok with me." 

I love helping kids navigate through tough times.
Whether it's divorce at home, rejection from friends, or just trying to grow up; I love walking with teenagers through the hardest time of their life.

But the issue remains...

It's no secret, Divorce is the plague in today's marriage relationship.
Nobody wants to get Divorced.
I mean think about it...

Bride is all dressed up on her wedding day
Groom is getting ready in the groom's chamber
Bridesmaids are delicately sashaying to the classical music in the background
Pastor stands up front
Vows are said
Reception celebrates the beauty of a new relationship
Nobody is thinking, in the middle of all that, "I can't wait till we end this thing!"

It's the furthest thought from their minds.

But recent statistics show, America's divorce rate centers around 41% for first marriages, 60% for second marriages, and 73% for third marriages. 

The divorce breakdown looks something like this according to the Institute of Professional Psychology...

AGE            BOYS            GIRLS

under 20        11.7%            26.7%
20-24             38.8%            36.6%
25-29             22.3%            16.4%
30-34             11.6%             8.5%
35-39              6.5%              5.1%

It's really sad when I talk to teens and hear the effects of divorce on their own self-worth, self-esteem, and their overall emotional growth through their teenage years. 

It's just sad.

I know there are times in marriage that are hard.
I know we mess up all the time.
I know expectations and failures plague relationships
But it's just super sad when something so good, so right, and so pure ends up in tragedy.

This morning I was reading in Matthew 19, and I found the section where Jesus spoke of divorce. 

 When Jesus had finished saying these things, he left Galilee and went into the region of Judea to the other side of the Jordan. Large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.

 Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"

 "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh' ? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

 "Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"

 Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."

 The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."

 Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it."

I'm in the middle of writing a book on teen dating, sexuality, and marriage.  I just wonder...

Is Divorce the plague, because we're in America?
Is it the sign of our times?
Have we missed out on teaching about relationships to teenagers?
Or, what's going on?

Obviously it's not God's design, but there are lots of things that aren't God's design.

Murder isn't God's design, but it happens.
Failure isn't God's design, but we see that every day.
Adultery isn't God's plan, but men and women fall to it on a daily basis
Lying isn't God's design, but every corner of business I deal with navigates little lies here and there, surely God didn't intend on that happening.

So I don't want to overstep my bounds here, but I do want to address the elephant in the room.  I do want to help parents see the effects divorce has on teenagers, and I do want to make sure teenagers understand the commitment of marriage.

What I do know, God is a forgiving God. 

He came to heal the broken hearts of the world. 
He came to mend relationships. 
But in the middle of ugly separation...can anyone help me here? 

Why is divorce such an o.k. thing in our culture today?

A Friend of mine shared this video with me the other day, and it struck a chord somewhere in my soul.  I'd like to get your thoughts on this.  As we forge ahead in our Faith, there must be a component of passion, a component of anguish, but...

What about the JOY?

What about finding the abundant life God came to offer?

You see, I think the anguish for the next generation is real.  The passion David Wilkerson calls to break the hearts of nominal believers is real.  But what about walking with people of the world, and finding joy in the creation God gave us to enjoy? 

I don't know. 

I'm torn here.

May we be a people that find tremendous passion and care for the next generation.
May we live lives true to the gospel.
May we forge ahead, and be a light in the dark world with the fuel of God's heart.

What do you think?

There's no doubt there's a constant debate among people of faith about Halloween.

Is it a day of evil worship, or can you just have fun times in the neighborhood?

The traditional roots of Halloween go all the way back to the Celtic Druid traditions.  Actually Halloween was a harvest festival celebrating the crops coming in, and noting the beginning of the dark winter.  Historically the Druids thought they could predict the future, connect with the spirits coming to usher in the dark cold winter months, and in more recent history the Romans used this time to worship the gods that influenced the harvest of fruits and grains.  This may be the origin of our traditional boobing for apples and giving of fruit in the "trick or treat" tradition. 

There's obviously a lot of historical reasons for the season, but the argument for or against Halloween in the world of faith often centers around the evil, vampires, demons, devils, and the worship of evil spirits. 

So our answer to the evil question is to create a "Christianized" holiday that takes all the bad stuff out, and several communities engage in Harvest Festivals. 

They set up activities for kids, allow them to dress up in various costumes, give out candy, and in essence have a big party to celebrate the harvest time. 

I know several churches who use the party as an outreach, which is an awesome way to give back to the community, and present the gospel, but some just try to clean up the party, call it something different, and somehow feel like they're doing "God's Holiday."  When all the while it's just Halloween with a different name.

Please don't read criticism in this post.  I don't mean to offend anyone spending all the time and energy creating a 'harvest festival,' but rather; I'd like to just open up the conversation to a broader topic.

Can Halloween be a time where people of faith can engage with their community, who are already celebrating, be lights in the dark places, and rather than trying to create a subculture of cleanliness that really is doing the same thing, be people who drive culture rather than follow it?

I know there are good things involved with giving young kids a place without all the scary monsters, but this week I ran into good church people of faith who are trying to eliminate halloween with their harvest festivals, but their doing the exact same things going on in the neighborhoods right outside the church.  It just doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. 

It almost seems like we've taken something of the world and re-created a "Christian Halloween" to suit our communities. 

If we're so offended by the holiday all together, why don't we try and make something totally different?  OR...Maybe we engage with the world for a night, and try to show there is evil in the world, but there can be good to overcome it.

Just a few ideas...

What if we had people dress up like heroes coming to conquer evil.
Or..what if we had Halloween parties at our homes that explained the history, and gave a good message somewhere in the evening.
What if we had people of faith who turned it into a night of giving, without trying to re-brand Halloween, and in effect start creating a separate sub-harvest culture.   

I'm just asking the question. 

I'm sure there are some of you out there with strong ideas on the subject, and I'd love to hear what you think. 

Is Halloween something we should ban, or can we find a way to be "in the world-but not of the world" without silly Christianese sub cultures?

What say you?