Apun ka web !

Conversation

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 07:03:37 +0000

Husband comes home early and sees his wife with another guy.

Wife: why are you early?

Husband: Who is he?

Wife: Don't try to change the topic.

A true Fact of Life :

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:56:00 +0000

Beemar Employee se uski biwi boli - Iss bar koi janwaro ke doctor ko dikhao tabhi aap theek hoge…

Pati - Woh kyon ?

Biwi - Roz Subah Murge ki tarah jaldi uthh jate ho...

Ghode ki tarah bhag ke office chale jate ho...

Gadhe ki tarah dinbhar kaam karte ho...

Aids ka mareez

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:53:13 +0000

1 Dr. ne Aids k mareez ki kamzor halat dekh kar pucha
aap kuch lete kyo nahi....

Mareez bola:abe aur kitni loon,
Le le k to ye haal hua hai............

Who kaunsi situation hai...

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:51:39 +0000

Wo kon si situation hai jisme mard 15 min me thak jaata hai aur aurat chahati hai ki wo karta rahe....

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"shopping"

magar aap ki soch ko 100 topo ki salami.. ;

Share if you are against racism

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:49:48 +0000

A 50 something year old white woman arrived at her seat and saw that the passenger next to her was a black man.

Visibly furious, she called the air hostess.

"What's the problem, ma?" the hostess asked her.

"Can't you see?" the lady said - "I was given a seat next to a black man. I can't seat here next to him. You have to change my seat"

Rone se kisi ko Paya nahi Jata

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:43:32 +0000

Rone se kisi ko Paya nahi Jata,
Khone se kisiko Bhulaya nahi Jata,

Waqt Sabko Milta hai Zindgi Badlne ke liye,
Par Zindagi nahi Milti Waqt Badlne ke liye.

Vo ik dost jo pyara sa lagta hain

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:41:32 +0000

Vo ik dost jo pyara sa lagta hain,
Bahut pass hai dil k phir bhi juda sa lagta hain,

Bahut dino se aaya nahi koi paigam uska,
Shayad kisi baat pe khafa sa lagta hain …

Sochte h ki aapka naam kya rakhe,
sirf dost rakha to ruth jaoge

Khwab rakha to tute jaoge,
chalo aapka nam zindgi rakh de kum se kum maut tak to saath nibhaoge.

Master Joke of the Day

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:38:27 +0000

SCENE: VI STANDARD CLASSROOM IN INDIA

HISTORY TEACHER: "Name some famous Indians who struggled against the British ?"

STUDENT: "Tendulkar, Dravid, Laxman, Sehwag, Dhoni, Raina..." !!!

India, my beloved India, where the religion of cricket unites us like none other. :D

Mohabbat Nahi Mili

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:35:18 +0000

Aisa nahi ke hum ko mohabbat nahi mili
Jaisi chahte thhey hum ko woh ulfat nahi mili,

Milne ko zindagi mein kai humsafar mile
Par un ki tabiyat se tabiyat nahi mili,

Chehron mein doosron ke tumein dhoondte rahe
Soorat nahi mili kahin seerat nahi mili,

Kaun kehta hai dost ki tumse

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:31:15 +0000

Kaun kehta hai dost ki tumse humari judaai hogi,
Yeh afwaah zaroor kissi dushman ne uraayi hogi,

Shaan se rahenge tumahre dil mein hum,
Itne dino mein kuch toh jagah banayi hogi.

Surprise Dance on Finnair Flight to celebrate India's Republic Day

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:28:39 +0000

Takeoff to Bollywood! A Dance Crew surprises passengers after boarding of a Finnair flight to Delhi to celebrate India's Republic Day on January 26th 2012.

Read more about what happened behind the scenes in the Finnair blog: http://blogs.finnair.com/2012/01/26/take-off-to-bollywood/

Value of a girl

Tue, 07 Feb 2012 06:20:08 +0000

-A Girl will Smile in Pain, Cry in Joy..

-She will give Up all Her Pleasures; just for a Smile from Someone She Loves..?

-She will Change a 100 Dresses, and still not Like any..

-She will Shout Like Maniacs; Then Cry Like a Lil' kid..

-She would Hug you, and forget the World..;)

world famous painter

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 07:01:49 +0000

There was this world famous painter.

In the prime of her career, she started losing her eyesight. Fearful that she might lose her life as a painter, she went to see the best eye surgeon in the world.

After several weeks of delicate surgery and therapy, her eyesight was restored.

The painter was so grateful that she decided to show her gratitude by repainting the doctor's office.

The last Sane Generation

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 06:39:16 +0000

We are the last generation that learnt to play in the street.

We are the first who've played video games, seen cartoons in color and went to amusement parks.

We were the last to record songs of the radio on cassettes and we are the pioneers of walkmans and chatrooms.

We Learned how to program the VCR before anyone else.

Nadaan Golu !

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 06:35:02 +0000

Traffic Police: Ap 180 Ki Speed Se Q Ja Rahe Ho?

GOLU : Ap logo Ne Hi to Side Wale Board Pe Likha He

Yaad Rakhe Ghar Pe KOI Apka Intezar Kar Rha He...

Jab Koi Baat...

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 06:32:14 +0000

Jab koi baat

bigad jaye

Jab koi mushkil

Pad jaaye

('-') mai kya

<) (> karu??

J L

tumhari Harkate hi aisi hoti h

Pta nhi kab sudhroge

The Ambulance and the Indian

Thu, 19 Jan 2012 06:29:32 +0000

An Indian living in Westmead, NSW (Australia) suffered a heart attack in front of the Pendle Hill Take-Away Restaurant on the road and was picked up by an ambulance.

Being religious, he kept repeating - "Hari Om Hari Om Hari Om ".

When the ambulance pulled into his home , instead of the Westmead Hospital,

his wife came out and screamed to the paramedics: 'Why didn't you take him straight to the hospital?'

Italian Maths Test

Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:56:53 +0000

An Italian workman wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he passes a little math test.

'Here's your first question,' the foreman said. 'Without using numbers, represent the number 9.'

'Withouta numbers?' the Italian says, 'Datsa easy.' and he proceeds to draw three trees.

'What's this?' the boss asks.

Kya saboot hai ke tum Gadi..

Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:51:14 +0000

Judge : Kya saboot hai ke tum Gadi (CAR) Speed main nahi chala rahe thay?

Admi : Sir main apni biwi ko lene SusRaaL ja raha tha

Judge : Thats All Case Dismissed.

Aaj Ka updesh

Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:46:39 +0000

Aaj Ka UPDESH:

Girlfnd chahe jitni b kharab ya chalu ho Kabhi us se dosti mat todna,

Qki "PANI"kitna b gnda ho jaye "AAG" bujhane k kam to aa hi jata hai..

English chalegi na??

Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:44:46 +0000

Ek ladka ladki dekhne gaya.

usne english me baat karne ka socha or bola. "english chalegi na?"

ladki sharmate huye boli. "soda sath me ho to desi bhi chalegi .."

quit smoking

Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:42:47 +0000

A burnt cigarette ash said:

Today its me, because of you !

but Tomorrow its you, because of me!! .

Quit smoking before smoking quits you

The Five Toughest Female Questions Are:

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 05:05:08 +0000

What are you thinking about?

Do you love me?

Do I look fat?

Do you think she is prettier than me?

What would you do if I died?

What makes these questions so difficult is that every one is guaranteed to explode into a major argument if the man answers incorrectly (i.e. tells the truth). Therefore, as a public service, each question is analyzed below, along with possible responses.

cricket in heaven

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 04:52:18 +0000

Two guys, Arun and Sumit, are sitting on a park bench feeding pigeons and talking about Cricket, like they do every day. Arun turns to Sumit and says, "Do you think there's cricket in heaven?"

Sumit thinks about it for a minute and replies, "I dunno. But let's make a deal: if I die first, I'll come back and tell you if there's cricket in heaven, and if you die first, you do the same."

They shake on it and sadly, a few months later, poor Arun passes on in an accident .

One day soon afterward, Sumit is sitting there feeding the pigeons by himself when he hears a voice whisper, "Sumit... Sumit..."

technical abilities to give an art form

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 04:49:31 +0000

# Local variable -

Mein pal do pal ka shayar hoon,

pal do pal meri kahani hai

pal do pal meri hasti hai..

# Global variable -

Main har ik pal ka shayar hoon,

har ik pal meri kahani hai

har ik pal meri hasti hai …

Can we see this around us?

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 04:45:14 +0000

"AJEEB HAI NA"

Rs.20 Ka NOTE Bahot ZYADA Lagta Hai Jab

GARIB Ko Dena Ho, Magar HOTEL Mein TIP

Dena Ho To Bahot KAM Lagta Hai.

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Can I Borrow $5?

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 04:41:36 +0000

A woman came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find her 7-year old son waiting for her at the door.

SON: 'Mummy, may I ask you a question?'

MUM: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the woman.

SON: 'Mummy, how much do you make an hour?'

MUM: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the woman said angrily.

Dad: Whos this girl???

Sat, 07 Jan 2012 03:14:35 +0000

Dad: Whos this girl???

Boy: My girlfriend .

Next day

Dad: Now whos this"new"girl???

Boy: Rishta wohi, Item Nayee...!! !

An evil Atheist

Sat, 07 Jan 2012 03:13:42 +0000

An evil Atheist explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of natives. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself "Oh God, I'm screwed!!!!!."

There is a ray of light from heaven and a voice booms out: "No, you are NOT screwed. Pick up that stone at your feet and bash in the head of the chief standing in front of you."

So the explorer picks up the stone and proceeds to bash the living heck out of the chief.

As he stands above the lifeless body, breathing heavily and surrounded by 100 natives with a look of shock on their faces, Gods voice booms out again: "Okay ..... NOW you're screwed."

The Financial Crisis Explained humorously !

Sat, 07 Jan 2012 03:09:12 +0000

Mary is the proprietor of a bar in Dublin . She realises that virtually all of her customers are unemployed alcoholics and, as such, can no longer afford to patronise her bar.

To solve this problem, she comes up with new marketing plan that allows her customers to drink now, but pay later.

She keeps track of the drinks consumed on a ledger (thereby granting the customers loans).

Word gets around about Mary's "drink now, pay later" marketing strategy and, as a result, increasing numbers of customers flood into Mary's bar. Soon she has the largest sales volume for any bar in Dublin .