Arash's World

Novel Experiences and Their Effects on Memory: Reflections on Dr. Lila Davachi’s Quinn Memorial Lecture 2026

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 15 Mar 2026 01:03:00 +0000

It is that time of the year again for me: To attend the annual lecture of the Quinn Memorial, which has become a dear tradition to me. I started going to these fascinating and memorable lectures more than a dozen years ago and it is something I look forward to every year. The only times I have missed the Quinn Memorial were due to the pandemic where it was canceled or due to other commitments, for instance, work or appointments that I could not escape from.

Let it also be stated that part of my own personal tradition includes the complimentary and much appreciated glass of wine (I usually opt for red) as well as a brief chat and a few questions for the renowned speaker, all reasons why an online option is not feasible and only half the experience.

This time around I did something I had not done previously: I invited a handful of people to come along with me. Doing new things or doing things differently with its effects on memory will be discussed further below but the main reason I had not done this before was that as a generally reserved and private person, I like to go there alone. That way I could pay close attention and take notes during the talk. Also, I felt that I could freely mingle afterwards and talk to other guests and meet a variety of people. As a final point, it was also because I did not feel that many people in my social circle would be genuinely interested in these types of talks and lectures.

As the subject coincided with an upcoming book club discussion of Andy Clark’s The Experience Machine (more on this later as well), I figured that there might be some interest and perhaps overlap with group members, but alas, yet again, I ended up going solo. It was a shame because it was another wonderful talk that I would have loved to share with likeminded friends, but I get it, people are busy; they have busy lives and priorities, or they may simply not be as interested in these events as myself.

But enough preamble and let’s dive in! The talk was entitled “The wisdom of the unconscious mind: offline reactivation consolidates, integrates, and updates knowledge” by Dr. Lila Davachi from Columbia University. The title may not be on par with the talk itself; first off, I must admit that the title on its own does not necessarily sound sexy or exciting and may be a bit too technical particularly with the added subtitle. At the same time, the lack of capitals takes away from the transformative features that were included in the lecture itself, and finally, although it deals with the unconscious, it is a bit of a misnomer because the talk was more about brain processes than the mind per se.

Sadly, not much psychoanalysis to speak of and on the topic of dreams, Dr. Davachi simply stated that neither she nor anybody else she is familiar with has any clue or idea why we dream and what its purpose may be. I differ on this matter, but she has a valid point in terms of memory retrieval and consolidation of course and that was the main focus of her talk.

There were interesting insights alongside a new understanding of how memories are formed, how they are strengthened and/or weakened and, as a language instructor, I appreciated that she provided some useful tips and vital points on how to be able to consolidate them further so our memories and knowledge do not end up decomposing in the waste bin of our mind.

But what are the different processes that occur in the brain to ensure that we have memories in the first place? I remember from psych undergrad classes that memory was closely tied and connected with the hippocampus. And although that still holds true, the real story is much more complex and more intricate than that.

First off, there are two parts to memories, the encoding and then later its retrieval. The encoding is basically the input, which is then converted into a memory. This often occurs offline, that is the hippocampus replaying the information after the event. Yet the brain is not passive in any of this; it actively selects what to consolidate and what not. In other words, what is deemed relevant is offloaded and distributed to other cortical parts of the brain, and what is not is left behind and may be forgotten completely.

As a result, the memory becomes consolidated not just by replaying it but rather by having it play like an orchestra. If the memory itself is strong, that is salient, vivid and involves an emotional reaction, it becomes more resilient and has a much stronger survival rate. In fact, connectivity is crucial here and can protect against forgetting.

The retrieval itself can come from cues, with some of them being partial. This may be something we see or something someone says that then triggers a memory; we may actively look for specific information or try to recall an event in the past. This is also not only related to the context and the circumstances of the memory event, but it also depends on what happens afterwards, whether it is repeated consciously or subconsciously or not. Sometimes associations and associated occurrences can aid the memory to remain strong even in the face of time.

This can occur in different ways. One of them is reward. If we are expecting a certain reward, we may work harder to ensure that we can later recall the given information. Put differently, it is motivation that can ensure both short and long-term retrieval. This is even more prevalent when we have motivation to remember. Hence reward and repeated encodings improve memory retrieval. This is also true with any information that we prioritize, something that we cherish and value for whatever reason.

It is noteworthy that cortical networks are more stable than just the hippocampus. In this cortical dialogue and interaction, weak memories need to be replayed more than strong memories to ensure that they can be recalled at a later time. There is also a significant difference between recalling simple standalone episodic events versus the gist of the situations and with it some overlapping details. When memories are clustered together, they tend to be more resistant to the erosion of time.

Interestingly, the same can be applied to routine memories if they are combined with novel and interesting or intriguing information. For instance, social and special novelty helps both mood and memory. Going out of your way to take on different activities or to take a different route will not only help you better recall the new information, but it will also make you feel better, excited and aroused. At the same time, all this will color your regular routine actions and make them stand out more than previously or otherwise.

Let’s face it, if you are living on autopilot, your routine actions become a muddled and indiscriminate mess of sorts, and you would either confuse them or forget them altogether. But the moment you encounter something or someone new on your regular path, you remember everything much more vividly and in greater detail while also feeling good about the whole experience.

This is your cue to get out and do something differently. When you do this, you will feel more alive and remember it much better. Carpe diem may not just be about going out there and taking risks but also trying out something new and different. Sure it can involve minimal or moderate amounts of risk but more importantly, just stepping out of your comfort zone or regular routine can indeed aid your overall memory in this case.

Now to return to my book club reading of Andy Clark’s book. His theory is that the brain is not just a passive recipient of sensory information but that it plays an active role in the process. It is not just encoding and processing the information that crosses its path but it constantly tries to predict what will happen.

When the prediction is correct, we can save time and energy and focus on things of greater importance to us. This is not unlike our experience of driving. When we start off, we need to pay close attention to everything around us and try our best to move this metal box in a safe and sound manner. But after time, it becomes more innate and automatic and our brain takes over the driving until or unless something surprising and unexpected occurs needing our attention.

So, during the reception I had the opportunity to ask Dr. Davachi about the brain predicting events and whether salient information would help us remember them better. She said that most likely we would. I then asked her whether the new incoming information would override the previous predictive pattern or maybe have us forget it altogether and replace it with something new.

She said that it depended on how strong the pattern was encoded, whether it was part of a weak or a strong memory. If we took that path more than a dozen times, we may just carry on with as it may be resistant to a single episodic memory or minimal incongruent information. Hence, in the case that the pattern has been more entrenched, it would not be so easily abandoned and replaced.

All this has also some relevance with trauma and traumatic events. They can lead to rumination, which can occur both online and offline. Yet at the same time, they may also become stronger because the brain would read certain cues in that particular light and frame of mind. Hence, for a war survivor, any loud noise can be seen as a potential threat where fireworks or car exhaust backfires may feel threatening.

Yet, on the flip side, good experiences will fill us with positive feelings, and we would look forward to other or similar events. In my case, this was yet another outstanding and memorable event that makes me look forward to the next one, regardless of whether I shall be accompanied or not.

Rock on, Disco Sucks! The Explosive Music Culture War

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 11 Jan 2026 00:38:00 +0000

When disco became mainstream, it was already much more than merely music. Disco was a colorful umbrella that hosted and included a lifestyle, a sense of fashion, a sub-culture, and a mentality, whereas for certain parts of the population, it also represented a viable threat to their own understanding and perception of music and of the world.

This is why disco caused a strong backlash from people who with their heart and soul embraced rock’n’roll; they suddenly felt that they were being pushed in the background and eroded by a music genre that they despised. It all culminated in an explosive encounter and a riot at a Disco Demolition night on a baseball field essentially burying this genre once and for all. The backlash against the Beatles for John Lennon’s infamous Jesus comments pales in comparison to this.

To understand why there was such hatred against disco, we must look at its origin. This type of music started off underground, and it was played at gay nightclubs to great acclaim. A certain distinct and often over-the-top fashion sense went hand in hand with the genre. Yet because it was catchy and there were beats to groove to, disco spread like wildfire. More and more women took part in these parties, and they brought their own lavish styles with them, which could not help but raise the curiosity of heterosexual men as well.

After a while, it came as no surprise that colored women singers would not only embrace this music but add their own touch and flourishes to the genre. In a sense, this added to the budding sense of feminism, and it is perhaps nowhere as clear and distinct as in Gloria Gaynor’s hit “I will survive.” Not only was she telling off her ex, but she did so in a groovy style. As we can note, race, feminism, and political aspirations were embodied with disco from its outset. Basically, disco took the demonstrations for equal rights of homosexuals and women away from the streets and onto the dance floor.

The turning point was of course the quintessential classic Saturday Night Fever which popularized both the music and the dance moves and made it accessible to everyone regardless of gender or race. Disco became universal and by extension even more egalitarian and moved from the underground to the foreground and into everyone’s living room. Soon enough, radios switched to disco whether it be The Bee Gees or various other bands and musicians of the times, and yes, that includes The Village People. This was a decisive shift from more rock-oriented riffs to groovy beats on the radio waves.

Enter rock’n’roll enthusiast Steve Dahl who literally suffered the consequences. In fact, he is considered one of the first shock jocks who was, like Howard Stern, not afraid to speak his mind on the radio and who would share inappropriate and controversial comments with, for, and for the sake of his audience. Yet overnight - and it happened to be Christmas Eve and right after he and his wife had opted to buy a house - Steve lost his job because of disco. This did not sit well, and he vowed to fight back.

The term that become popular at the time was Disco sucks and rock aficionado Steve Dahl took a jab whenever he could. This ubiquitous slogan then appeared on signs, banners, and T-shirts throughout the country but it all culminated in an event that Steve Dahl helped organize: The disco demolition night where people were encouraged to bring their disco records; these would then be carried to the baseball field only to have them exploded with good old-fashioned dynamite. This event that occurred on July 12, 1979, at Comiskey Park in Chicago was intended as a Major League Baseball promotion but ended up in a full-out riot with significant damages and destruction to property, equipment, and the field itself.

The crowd was predominantly young white males most of whom were not baseball fans and were half or fully drunk right before and when the "disco explosions" occurred. Although Steve himself strongly denies it and says it was all about the music, there are elements of race and ethnicity, and sexual orientation at play that cannot be overlooked or ignored in this case.

Yet these gender and racial differences tend to be also embodied in the respective genres themselves. Rock’n’roll has a masculine attitude attached and embodied within it. A stereotypical rock star would be someone who drinks a lot, does drugs, also a lot, behaves irresponsibly on stage, off stage and in hotel rooms and then caps his day by having a lot of sex with many different female fans and groupies. Rock stars are expected to act in that way and hence are given carte blanche to this excessive and aggressive lifestyle. After all, their own self-professed slogan is sex, drugs, and rock’n’roll and they believed they had to live up to it.

Disco, on the other hand, is a whole different beast. It is about dancing, peace, sweat, sensuality, and love, as well as lovemaking. It is basically better-looking and better-dressed hippies moving their hips and their whole body to specific beats.

That said, the disco lifestyle, however, was not immune to drug use either, with cocaine being the yuppie choice. All this was encouraged with the opening of Studio 54, a very poplar discotheque that was all about style, even more so than the music. So much so that the owner would personally select and decide who looked good and fashionable enough to be allowed entry to the premises. The rest would have to go home, lick their wounds and wounded pride for the night, only to hope for a better fate or prepare a more outrageous costume next time around.

All this ended overnight right after the riot at Disco Demolition. This was a major fiasco, and nobody wanted to have any of it. Radios stopped playing disco music on their waves and rock made it back on, at least temporarily. This meant that certain social progress was suddenly cut short and undermined while many black female singers lost their jobs and income overnight. Interestingly, this was somewhat similar to Steve’s fate although he ended up doing fine in the end.

Yet do not fret and do not cry for the lost and forlorn heydays of disco. Disco may have stopped but it did not die. In fact, it transformed and was reborn in what is known as house music, and it really brought DJs to the forefront. The groovy beats continued still albeit in a different form and with much less resistance the second time around. And rock’n’roll may have become a relic of the past but it still rocks.

The City of Shenzhen: Symbol of the Benefits (and Drawbacks) of Technological Progress

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 02 Nov 2025 20:32:00 +0000

So my relationship with the digital world is a rather interesting one. I find technology inherently fascinating but am also terrified of its potential consequences. On one hand, it can drive humanity to connect in a variety of ways and help us solve problems together while on the other hand, it can sow division and mistrust and drive us apart, i.e. today’s world. Yet my main concern remains the erosion of humanity and the lack of human touch.

That said, it is indeed technology that has brought you dear reader to this page of my blog, which enables me to communicate with you in such a personal form coming at you from my hometown to yours across the globe. Like in a letter I have been given the opportunity (or taken the opportunity) to share some of my innermost thoughts and often feelings on different subjects of interest and concern. Yet unlike in a letter, I do not know who the addressee is or will be and almost always do they not respond or comment, hence turning this into a peculiar one-way means of communication.

The important thing is that you are here and that you are willing and taking the time to read my post. For that I am truly appreciative, and it would have not been possible without the aid of technology. But all this is serving as a prelude to a place that has in my view fully embraced technology as a part of their existence, lifestyle, and raison d’être, which is mostly quite fascinating and inspiring, albeit, as it pertains to anything, it comes with a few caveats of its own.

In fact, few places around the world are as modern and as technologically advanced as the city of Shenzhen in China. We may claim to be living in a technological world here in North America, but it seriously pales in comparison to how this Chinese city is run and operated by fully integrating technology into daily life as well as their way of life.

Full disclosure: I have not been there myself (yet), and all my knowledge is based on a French-speaking documentary that I have recently seen. What was demonstrated in this program was mind-blowing to say the least and only proves how backward, in fact almost cavemen-like, we and our current lives are in contrast, technologically speaking.

Shenzhen is a fascinating case because not only do they fully embrace the latest and most innovative technology of the times, but this is fully integrated into the society at large. I have always seen technology as a means to having more ease and comfort but there can be two issues with this. Either the technology does not work as advertised or intended (yes, I’m looking at you cursed printer!) or it is filled with glitches. That urgent payment you need to make becomes impossible if the server is down regardless of if it be yours or theirs that is lacking.

But in Shenzhen everything has moved to the technological domain. So much so that any vendor, food stand, or panhandler will not accept cash but only automatic payments, which are often accompanied by a QR code. All this is even taken further in certain stores where you pay with your handprint or, in some cases, the store camera may use facial recognition, see what you have bought and then automatically charge you the amount on your credit card or bank account on file. The idea of simply walking into a store, taking items and just walking out without archaic forms of paying cash or card - and certainly not committing theft - is a wonderful idea to me.

People might object about privacy, but they tend to be the same people who then overshare on social media. At the same time, who cares if other people can see what I am purchasing, which could be accessible by gaining access to credit card statements. And if you do not want to be seen entering a store with someone, then don’t enter with them. In this case, a lack of privacy is a minimal cost to pay for major convenience.

In fact, younger generations may simply love the fact that there is no interaction whatsoever with a salesclerk. If you prefer your interactions online, the city of Shenzhen has it all in one place, one app that allows you to do practically anything. If you want to make bank or mortgage payments, buy food, hail a cab, bet on sports or buy pretty much anything online, you can do it with an app that includes various single apps under one umbrella.

Also, if you want to have food delivered to you in a park, you can access the vending machines that actually sell real fresh food. You order whatever you want, and the restaurant delivers it to you in a drone by dropping off your order in the said vending machine, which you unpack and you can immediately recycle its packaging in the adjacent bin: voilà, now you can enjoy your hot freshly made food outdoors or anywhere you find yourself. This was shown in the documentary, but I am certain soon you could order the food from wherever you are and have it delivered to you promptly with a personal drone service.

Apart from cameras throughout the city, robots are also everywhere. That includes various self-driving cars that yield to pedestrians more than human drivers would. In fact, your hotel service will be a robot taking your luggage, effectively operating the elevator, and providing room service at any hour of your choosing.

Cameras will also be found at the workplace, which would be part and parcel of a smart building. You enter your workplace and do not need a security card as facial recognition will let you enter. You will be easily tracked, so employees who want to cut corners or kill time will have a more difficult time but at the same time, you can be easily located in case of an emergency, a fire, a natural disaster or what-have-you.

Every place with the exception of the washrooms has cameras. The smart building will tell you of available parking spots in the building so you do not waste any time or effort; it can automatically regulate the temperature of your office or workplace, and it can easily detect intruders or address threats in a prompt manner.

Speaking of intruders, there was a case of a foreigner who in a moment of oversight had left his laptop unattended in an outdoors café, which was stolen a few minutes later. The security guard assured him that he would be in possession of his computer in a few hours’ time. And so, it was. They went through the cameras spread throughout the city and were able to locate the thief, follow his movements to his home and easily identity him through the large database at hand.

This was the other amazing bit that crime is literally non-existent in the city of Shenzhen. It is not due to the virtue or moral conscience of its residents but simply due to the fact that you would get caught. What better and more effective way of preventing crime! Residents can leave their bikes unattended and their cars and houses unlocked, ironically hearkening back to a good old era - at least in certain small towns - where life was just safer and more peaceful. Unless you are a potential criminal or you are supporting crime, this situation is a win-win for all residents.

What exactly are the drawbacks here? As eluded in my earlier prelude, technology can be misused, abused, or used improperly. You could track an ex and hence invade and impinge upon that person’s rightful private life; you could watch people’s movements seen as a potential political or ideological threat and not so much for the sake of public safety. The owner or supervisor will have absolute control through constant surveillance of the workplace. All of these are valid concerns that should not be downplayed or ignored and should be accounted for.

There is also a different darker side to technology that the documentary looked at as well in the form of AI and having an artificial companion or a sex robot. Those are also parts of technology that would, as I mentioned, undermine the human touch and replace it with something much less fulfilling or satisfying.

It comes not as a surprise that this trend would also thrive in a technologically sophisticated place like Shenzhen or any other place in the world. Yet like with blogs, videos, and social media, we also have accountability and the responsibility to act with integrity. At the same time, we need business, political, and community leaders to help and support us in this endeavor and to put certain guardrails for our overall protection.

All in all, I believe that Shenzhen is a symbol of how modern technology can make life not only easier and more convenient but also safer and more satisfying for everyone. That is the whole point of technology: to facilitate and not complicate our lives. This can be taken a step further to solve problems and even come up with solutions not only regarding daily interactions but also offering avenues for a better, more peaceful and sustainable future. We have the means, know-how and technology, so why not delve into it and make it part of our future lifestyle?

Reflections on Luck: David Milch’s Series on Horse Racing and My Own Life Karma

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 12 Oct 2025 18:13:00 +0000

I’m fascinated and maybe slightly obsessed with horses now. This is news and unexpected to me because equines had never stood out for me, with the brief exception of Mister Ed, a show that I had sporadically watched in my younger years. Two things did not strike me as odd back then since I took them for granted and as a given: one, that a horse could talk - why, of course, they can! - and two, that I should be actually watching a show in which a horse would talk.

After that, horses completely disappeared out my life - except one scary pony ride but we shan’t talk about that - until my recent decision to watch David Milch’s series called Luck. This show deals with the world of horse racing and everything else that’s even remotely related and connected to it. Although luck, coincidences, synchronicity and serendipity are all themes that have always been of interest to me and that I have previously written, thought, blogged about in one way or another, I got into this series for quite a different reason.

As luck would have it, I happened to ask myself one day, what were some of my all-time favorite series, and David Milch’s Deadwood sprang to mind. The series stood out for me because of its colorful language and its well-rounded characters. By colorful, I don’t necessarily mean the swearing and cussing – though there are exorbitant amounts of that and at times a bit too much for my innocent prudish ears – but rather the poetry behind them. It felt like profanity-ridden Shakespeare on steroids.

But entering Luck was a different ballgame altogether. This was another series that came to a sudden halt but at least it was not as screeching as Deadwood, which ended on a climax and left us not only hanging for more but literally hanging. The addition of the TV movie many moons later was welcome news, but it was too little too late for me.

My initial hesitation to enter the world of Luck was that there was little appeal for me to begin with. I was not a fan of horse racing nor gambling. The fact that it got cancelled due to accidents surrounding a few of its horses, which had to be euthanized, only underscored the irony of the situation. In a series that purported to analyze luck while also imbuing all episodes with a palpable love and concern for horses and their wellbeing, it was highly unlucky that it ended up being eventually cancelled at the behest of PETA.

Yet, apart from learning some of the ins and outs of the world of horse racing, what trainers and owners go through, how agents recruit jockeys and how jockeys train and how - not unlike supermodels - they have to watch their weight to be able to ride and participate, and let alone all the folks betting money on potential outcomes, there was a lot to digest in this series.

To be honest, I needed at least three episodes to get used to the jargon and understand some of the motivations behind the characters but albeit confusing, it was never boring to me nor was it ever too much to handle. Incidentally, I was happy and content to find out that seasoned critics had been struggling with the same issues, so it was not just me nor my lack of knowledge and understanding at play here.

The most fascinating thing, without giving much away here, is that Milch looks at luck from an objective almost clinical perspective. In a way, he shuns our traditional and admittedly moral view of good versus bad luck. Bad things happen but then they may lead to good outcomes, while good outcomes can have negative consequences while at the same time, there are good intentions that lead to tragic and disastrous results. At other times, luck has no repercussion or value whatsoever on some of its protagonists. They either don’t see it or just don’t care.

Early on in the series, a group of friends make a bet, and they win big time. Now we would say that they are lucky. But for starters, this was due to a meticulous and hard-earned winning strategy by one of the group’s masterminds – let’s call him Jerry because that was his name - who made very precise and calculated bets that luckily enough paid off.

Yet, we soon find out that this genius on the horse racetrack has been struggling with his own set of demons. He has a gambling addiction and loses most of his share in playing poker against a Chinese shark; they mock and spar with each other and egg the other one on to continue playing with racist jeers from either side. The previous gain from the bet is making Jerry play and play on and lose more money hence turning what ought to be beneficial into something detrimental.

All the while, the group is hesitant to declare their winnings at first. This is because they are paranoid that somebody could try to steal the money from them, to rob them. As a result, they are trying to keep a low profile. And just like the gambling addiction, they do not call it quits, taking their winnings and starting their new happy life; no, they keep on betting because they want to win even more money, and thus the vicious cycle continues. To increase their winnings, they even buy their own horse to run and bet on, and they take on added responsibilities of paying a trainer all the time worrying about their horse’s health, a common preoccupation among this type of ownership.

Now what has all or any of that to do with my own life? Apart from me wanting to go to my very first horse race soon – I will keep you posted with a post on that! - and being drawn to anything horse-related - there was a weekend I attended an awesome show entitled Blue Horse Opera (by the way horse opera was a term used for westerns and it was not an opera) and later attending a wine tasting of a local vineyard run by a French-speaking philosopher-friend entitled Whispering Horse, which I am going to drink around Thanksgiving - there are certain aspects that have been shaping my own perspective on luck and karma.

I have noted and it is something I repeatedly mention on my podcast that it is the suffering or admittedly bad luck that helps us advance more in our quest for spiritual growth and healing as opposed to when things are just fine or going well for us. This is because when things are going good, there is little incentive or motivation to do things differently: if it ain’t exactly broke, why the hell would you want to fix it in the first place?

It’s when things go sour, and worse, when you are about to hit rock bottom that you are forced to do things differently or change your view and outlook on certain things. This is also directly related to my view of luck. I would consider myself lucky overall but have had ratches of not-so-good luck even though I have been working and trying very hard.

This has been felt and observed in my personal and professional life. I just could not help feeling that the cards seem to be stacked against me. Yes, I am blessed in many ways and very grateful for many good things that I have in my life but there has always been a cap, which I have found rather unreasonable and not proportional to the amount of work, effort, energy, and good will that I bring to the table. To put it more bluntly, I feel that I am not getting what I’m due and that I’m being short-changed in the process.

In other words, I’m still waiting for a lucky break, and karma just does not seem to be on my side. I do understand that this is a rather simplistic view of things, and it has a why me or oh-woe-me flavor to it. It reached its apex around two years ago when I was crossing the Burrard bridge after a Cosmic Night event at the Space Centre. I had just missed the bus and was stuck in the cold with both my professional and personal life in shambles at the time.

They still are by the way but I have come to accept that things do take their time, that even though I experience headwinds they do not last forever – albeit a really long time – and yet, I have to keep trying and preserve my vision and pursue my dreams despite the odds. This is often difficult and very frustrating when things do not work out for no apparent reason. It is like studying very hard for an exam and still failing it over and over again.

It feels not fair, and one may even feel entitled to get angry and lash out, but this is not how I want to react from now on. I want to continue working and trying hard for its own sake by not expecting (immediate) results. And in fact, ever since I am focusing only on the path and the journey by lessening my own wishes and expectations, I find myself in a much happier state. All I can do is to be true to myself and try as hard as I can.

Certainly, the desire to have tangible outcomes is important, and without it, I would be deluding myself but at the same time, expecting things to work out simply because one puts in the effort goes counter to how real life and karma work. There is a lot to be happy about and it is my own negative – and why not spell it out: toxic – way of seeing things that gets in the way of my own happiness.

What if things are going exactly the way they are and they are supposed to go and that my own luck and happiness with smooth sailing are just around the corner but that I cannot see it yet? What if the next curve or curve ball will lead me to my own treasure, not only an outer one but more importantly an inner one?

And yet, I feel very happy, and yes, lucky, and the rest shall fall into place sooner or later. What I need to do in the meantime is to empty myself from certain unreasonable and inflexible demands of the petty and limited ego voice and be open and receptive to what shall come my way and then embrace it wholeheartedly. It most likely is not what I expect but it may be in fact even better. And it’s going to be about time that my chickens will come home to roost, and my horse will finally win the highly coveted and cherished Kentucky Derby!

Out of this World: My Lower Back Pain and Space Genetics with Christopher Mason

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Wed, 08 Oct 2025 19:54:00 +0000

Over the past years, I have attended the Don Rix Distinguished Keynote Addresses with great enthusiasm and almost religious fervor. And no, it’s not just because of the food and wine (full disclosure: we receive a complimentary drink coupon) but it is for the distinguished speakers who share and present their research and various insights with all of us.

In fact, I have seen a number of speakers on different topics at this wonderful annual Genome BC event starting with Dr. Clare M. Fraser on the human microbiome in 2019, the pandemic-induced virtual event with Carl Hansen in 2020 (alas no food or drink for that one!), then had Dr. Caroyln Hogg talk about koalas and Tasmanian devils in 2022, followed by the always interesting and outstanding Wade Davis (the author of The Serpent and the Rainbow) talk about "The Wayfinders of Genomic Wisdom" in 2023, and just last year, we had Dr. Sam Aparicio help us decode cancer and its management via the genomics revolution.

So here we are in 2025 and I was looking forward to Dr. Christopher Mason’s talk entitled “Space Genetics: Epigenetic evolution in Cancer, and a 500-year plan for Synthetic Biology” which was almost as bonkers as Wade’s brilliant address and I should have expected it based not only on the title but the slightly erratic and idiosyncratic spelling thereof. As someone who can be analytical and structured, I found the random capitalization or rather non-capitalization of certain words like evolution and plan to be equally disconcerting and enticing.

That Monday started off with a low-grade lower back pain, which I decided to completely ignore and disregard and went to the gym, nonetheless. I wanted to embrace the “No pain, no gain” mentality for a change. That said, the subsequent walk to the Convention Centre was difficult to say the least. Not only was I space walking in slow-mo with various involuntary stops due to sharp back pain but I realized and understood why lumbago is called “Hexenschuss” (literally "shot by witches") in German. I pictured three witches in black rolling with laughter and putting pins in that precise area of my back as I was trying to walk down the streets.

There were moments I considered dropping by the emergency room worried whether I would be able to make it there if the pain continued and increased proportionally. And yet, the pain-gain correlation was still fresh in the back of my mind, and I really did not want to miss out on this talk on space and genomics. I made it there in one piece, found my seat and decided to sit still and not budge for the remainder of the address.

Next to me were a couple of math teachers – I assume this because one of them was marking a bunch of math exams before the talk commenced. Those numbers and symbols were the root cause of some trauma for me, and I was going to tell her this was giving me PTSD. Then, I thought, she probably did not want to hear this from me and instead noticed how the lack of physical movement was good for my back.

And so, the event started after the usual predictable openings, introductions, and formalities, which I would have gladly skipped on a recording but unfortunately, you cannot really do that at live events. I was eager to see what Dr. Christopher Mason was all about and I was not to be disappointed. He did not mince words and started right away with a journey to Mars and asked us whether the body can survive such a physically and mentally demanding voyage.

What were the potential risks and hazards and how could they be circumvented or be accounted for? There were drills and exercises starting in parabolic flights in the 50s to simulate and prepare for such trips to space, including a rather hilarious video of cats floating in microgravity. This was not all fun and games as the scientific question of whether cats would land on their feet when in space was probed and examined in rigorous detail. The answer is no. I wondered if people felt back pain in space and whether one could say “no gravity, no pain”? The question did not occur to me at the event, so unfortunately, I did not ask him there and then.

By using NASA Twins Study, with Mark Kelly being on earth and Scott Kelly in space, scientists were able to discern and note some key differences between the two. Scott Kelly, who was in space, had certain changes to his genes: he got taller and younger! Sadly, those effects did not last but the interesting finding was that his telomeres were longer. These had something to do with the aging process, i.e. a positive effect, but they seemed to be also somewhat corelated with cancer. You just can’t have it all, can you now?

The interesting observation here was how the immune system responds to gravity and how gene expressions could be turned on and off in that process. Everyone is different, not only on earth but also in space and we all have different stress responses. By engaging in space omics studies, there is a lot that can be learned from all of this. (There are the inherent drive and desire to study pregnancies in space but that is obviously ethically questionable. Apparently, according to the records, there has been officially no sex in space, but that statement seems rather doubtful and perhaps unrealistic; anyhow, this particular study has been put on hold for now.)

The other aspect to study is the effects and changes of the microbiome. Dr. Mason gave the examples of crowded elevators or physical sports where microbiomes are shared and exchanged freely and copiously, which sounds like great fun. The most telling and slightly disturbing example of microbiomes was his daughter’s first visit to New York in which she licked a subway pole, which would be a most terrifying event in any parent’s life but putting on his scientific hat, he found the question rather intriguing.

As a result, they swabbed whole areas to find out. A simple lick snowballed and led to a full-fledged study, which demonstrated that 50% of found organisms were unknown. I found this shocking and terrifying, but Christopher Mason seemed rather at ease and nonchalant about it all including the discovery of 11000 new viruses. He claimed that they were not dangerous and that it all depended upon one’s immune system but licking random poles may be “probably fine” as he was later (mis)quoted in the media.

Now the question is how could we improve not only the microbiome but also make genetic modifications that could help an astronaut survive (and may I add thrive) in space? This would form a sort of protective shield or mechanism where certain genes could be turned on or off at will. For instance, apparently, we have a gene that can produce Vitamin C but that is turned off and no longer used.

Why would that matter? Well, here’s an interesting tidbit of information: both cats and dogs can produce their own Vitamin C, and this is why they do not get scurvy. Us humans, however, need to ensure we get our dose of this vitamin to protect ourselves from this disease. Why not just turn on the gene and be all right? And what would be the repercussions in terms of other diseases and the treatment of cancer and genetic illnesses? These are realities and possibilities thanks to many advances made in genomics and gene technology, such as epigenetic CRISPR.

This was an interesting mix and exploration of genetics and space, merging the micro with the macro world. As Chris (we are on a first-name basis now) remarked our time on this planet and this universe is limited seeing that we shall experience either a Big Crunch or a Big Rip sooner or later. It is shocking that regardless of what we do or don’t do to each other and our species on this planet, there is an expiry date attached to the universe.

And that would make space exploration a necessity for survival. And one of the biggest takeaways here is that we should preserve and keep hope alive and not be crushed by worries or back pain, which incidentally went away after a couple of glasses of red wine, courtesy of Genome BC.

Ode to Astrology: That Cursive Writing in Them Skies Above

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sat, 30 Aug 2025 19:58:00 +0000

“Que será, será.

Whatever will be, will be.

The future's not ours to see.”

Doris Day

I cannot but marvel at the night sky canvas filled with stars and imagine how they influence our lives on this tiny blue planet. We have various tools at our disposal to try to make sense of what is happening to our human lot down here and they can range from philosophy and religion to astrology and the occult arts and humanities. I am omitting sciences here not because I don’t believe in them or their utility but rather because disciplines like biology tend to be microcosmic and reductionistic in nature and are often set and grounded in their views and outlook; to illustrate, the one astronomy course I took as an elective (and as one of my science requirements) bored me to tears despite its grand scope and scale.

Astrology is to me akin to psychoanalysis like a distant cousin or a half-sister. It expresses a deep hidden truth that the more earthbound sciences (choose to?) miss out on. Astrology not unlike Tarot or I Ching dives into the unconscious and unearths gems and treasures that are not visible to the naked eye and impervious to cold facts and hard-boiled logic. It is not about selecting one or the other; it is about acknowledging that reason is valuable but so is our intuitive sense, something that we often ignore, underplay, or disregard to our own detriment.

Full disclosure: my own personal relationship with astrology has been spotty. I have managed to cover the whole gamut and spectrum starting off with teenage curiosity and with my young adult version casting doubts, as he was skeptical about its claims whereas at this stage of my life (i.e. midlife crisis), I find myself on the other side, hence completing my character arc from a cautious believer to a full-fledged fan and perhaps a few steps short of being a fanatic.

That I should eventually embrace astrology again and more warmly should not come as a surprise because I have been a fervent believer in oracles with some decades-long practice of reading and consulting Tarot cards that have been spot-on, precise, and uncanny in their predictions, alongside my unusual and uncommon habit of finding numerous playing and occasionally Tarot cards on the streets that would then guide me in my personal and professional life, including and most notably The World Tarot card, which at the time encouraged me to continue not only with my blog endeavor (Arash’s World) but to expand into podcast territory. The signs spoke, and I listened and acted upon them.

All these arts are linked and interconnected and are somewhat unfortunately labeled, stigmatized, and categorized under the occult rubric, which if you strip away the negative connotations can be simply seen as the diving into the unknown, a mysterious and mystic yet certainly existent and feebly tangible realm of sorts.

So what made me reconsider and turn around and embrace astrology more firmly? On a more objective level, I began to wonder how large physical bodies in space can affect each other in different ways. This goes beyond the gravitational push and pull and I’m not referring to spooky entanglements (though they are assuredly cool) but it also includes how emotions and perhaps outcomes may be influenced by a physical body from afar.

The moon does not merely affect the ebbs and tides but also our emotions, leading to restless and sleepless nights for some or a general surplus of positive and negative feelings for others. All the while, the moon is such a small body compared to the innumerable stars and planets all around us, and so, it is not farfetched to acknowledge that there may be something there.

Yet, more importantly, I have seen the stars work their magic on a more personal level. On one hand, there seems to be consensus and overlap among different readings and horoscopes. Of course, there may be fluctuations in how the data is interpreted and represented according to the given astrologer but there tends to be enough common ground across the board. A parallel I could think of, and I have mentioned earlier, would be psychoanalysis, another discipline that I moved heartily towards believing in its insights fervently and with all the fibers of my triple mind-body-spirit being.

Astrology like psychoanalysis is essentially an art form. For instance, a symbol in a dream may slightly change according to a psychoanalyst or the patient in question but there tends to be a general agreement and a baseline consensus among the professionals and practitioners.

Yet the poignant level of detail, depth, and accuracy never fails to surprise me in these fields. Sometimes my horoscope would not predict what happens but rather give me a very precise and uncanny snapshot of my emotional state of a given moment, which I can immediately verify to be true, and which is a staple of Tarot card readings that are referring to past or present circumstances.

At times, it may feel as if someone either has found access to my thoughts or to my journal or even both but that’s crazy talk of course, even crazier than what I am contemplating and saying in this blog post. But there is an at times jarring and spinetingling realization that there is more than is apparent to the eye or the logical brain.

I want to thank astrology and all astrologers that are engaged in this noble profession and who day in day out face the skeptics and non-believers with poise and confidence and their heads up; they know this to be true deep in their hearts and souls and are fully aware that their profession is noble and of help to others. Astrology is not unlike religion, but it is freer and more precise while fluctuating according to outward circumstances. It is about reading the signs and then coloring and interpreting them but one does not control the signs and becomes only a messenger and transmitter of them.

Also, over the last year or so, astrology has been serving as my unofficial guide and therapist (interestingly a both cheaper and more accurate and more competent one). What used to be sporadic findings of cards is now a regular daily practice for me. Not all predictions and observations are and come true of course. But when they are right, they are exact. And it is sometimes hard truths that I must face while also offering encouragement when I find myself drenched in doubt or stuck in a quagmire. The other benefit is that this source, like the other occult practices, is wise and sees beyond oneself in space and time and it can even read other people’s minds and intentions.

In a sense, Doris Day gets it wrong. The future can be read if you look at it closely. It is like reading tea leaves, runes, or cards; at the same time, you do not need any of them, you just need to understand to read the signs, which comes in the shape of coincidences (which incidentally do not exist and are not coincidental after all), happenstance, synchronicity, and intuition. The latter is similar to gut feelings but goes much deeper and is often harder to discern yet much more accurate and reliable with its straight and express connection line to the heart.

Moreover, there are two realms that exist simultaneously and may or may not be connected to each other. On one hand, the free will that we have, and which often comes with a surplus of mistakes and errors (such is the lot of being an imperfect human), while the other domain is fate, namely that which is embedded and engraved in the stars and cannot be changed, moved, or altered. Occasionally, they may be linked to each other in a certain degree or angle, at least in the sense of awareness, where one needs to come to a certain conclusion or gain certain insights so that one can fully embrace and embark upon one’s destiny.

I believe that many of our major life changes, including our eventual demise, fall into the fixed and permanent category. We can rail against it; we can try to avoid it, lock ourselves up in a bunker or a germfree hotel but when the time has come, we must leave one way or another. There’s no escaping that part of our fate.

Intuitively, I feel that finding true love or encountering one’s soul mate is also part of that domain. This gives me a sense of hope with a certain relief since I may, with my free will, mess things up (romantically things almost always go haywire but not always nor necessarily due to my own fault and misgivings) but that the stars will already know this and take it into account by correcting, adjusting, and guiding me along the way. Eventually, they will put me on the path that I am meant to tread as opposed to the maze I am currently finding myself in. To quote from a motet by Bach (though not the one you are thinking of), I do not let you, but you bless me, nonetheless. *

*“Ich lasse dich nicht, du segnest mich denn” BMV 1164 by Johann Christoph Bach who was Johann Sebastian’s father’s cousin and not to be confused with Bach’s son Johann Christoph Friedrich Bach.

Quinn Memorial Lecture 2025: Selective Attention and the Inner versus the Outer World

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Mon, 19 May 2025 21:24:00 +0000

It is that time of the year again when I venture out to UBC to engage and grapple with the current year’s Quinn Memorial Lecture. This time around, I had to rush to make it on time as my online university course ended just an hour before the event was set to begin. But as usual, I ended up being early, so I had more than enough time to settle comfortably and wait for the lecture to start.

In fact, I have been going to the series for over a dozen years now. The first talk I attended was on “Free Will, Neuroscience and Personal Responsibility” by Michael Gazzaniga. There were a couple of Quinn Memorial Lectures I had to miss due to work scheduling conflicts, and then, there was the pandemic, which crossed out and canceled entire lectures and events across the board, including a beloved concert series celebrating my then-favorite composer Ludwig Van. (In case, you’re curious, my post-pandemic go-to composer has been Mozart, so in either case, I find myself in excellent and capable hands.)

Back to our sheep, as the French would say. Incidentally, today’s topic was selective attention and for someone whose mind tends to wander, not so much because of a lack of focus but rather on focusing on too many things at once, I was curious to learn more about this tendency of mine. Digression is my middle name as you may note and witness in this post of mine, heck, who am I kidding, the whole blog is all about digressing!

But I digress. Yet I must confess that from the get-go, my attention was split. I was there to listen and take notes because it is something I do at these lectures with the aim of reproducing the content as faithfully as I am able, alongside my own thoughts and reflections. But the split existed since the Winnipeg Jets were fighting for their survival at the Stanley Cup series, so I would glance or could not help peeking at the scoreboard, which updated the score on an infrequent basis.

The title of this talk was, as you may have already noted in the image, “Focusing attention on sensory x memory contents to guide behavior” by Dr. Anna C. Nobre, who was inexplicably nicknamed and addressed by everyone as Kia. So, I shall permit myself to continue with the same trend.

Kia’s talk was about the outward and inward arrows of attention, their influence and interplay in relation to memory, both stored and incoming. As she stated in one of her slides (I’m not making this up nor reciting from memory here): “Memory and attention work together linking past and future to guide adaptive behavior.”

So, what does this mean? Well, on one hand, we have stimulation, which could be objects or events that lead - or at least have the potential to lead - to perception and action. At the same time, this interacts and is in flux with our internal attention, which is comprised of memories, either in our working memory or as part of our long-term memory. This then works as a way of anticipating, prioritizing, and selecting information, data, and stimuli, and would then potentially trigger or prime our reactions and actions upon them.

In other words, we have not only a perception and action loop, but we are dealing with our own cognition and objects in space versus objects in time (basically moments in space) as well as the inner world, thoughts, reflections, feelings, emotions, distractions, what-have-you. That includes and involves stimulation and processes that have been stored in the past leaving trails and traces in the present moment.

Hence, selective attention is not a state but a function. Put differently, goals and objectives from the inside are guiding the process of attention, whether we acknowledge this or not, and they all interact with the outside world. These “memory traces” then aid us with picking up signals and relevant cues from the world.

In these cases, voluntary and involuntary attention are happening together, and this is a highly dynamic system, which can also be flexible and reversible as we are actively engaging with the world. This is occurring because the brain is shifting and moving constantly between intangible memories and concrete sensory objects.

To illustrate this, we can look at two different examples. Imagine you are sitting cross-legged and meditating. Your focus is on your breath. Now as you are predominantly switched to our inner world, the outer world may be tugging on your attention strings. At this point, we are ignoring the inner distractions, such as random thoughts seeping into your focus, and we will also ignore and disregard the pain or discomfort in your legs as you are not new to this meditation practice, at least in this scenario.

But what about the car alarm sounding on your street? You may immediately switch back to your meditation because it is not yours. As a matter of fact, you don’t even have a car, so you’re all good. The situation would be different if it was your building’s fire alarm. At that point, you would most likely - and hopefully - stop the meditation and quickly get yourself to a safe place.

Here we see how the inner and outer world is vying for your attention, but you are selecting and prioritizing which one to attend to. In my next example, the situation is more complex as you are about to fulfil a task: making coffee.

Now as I have written previously on “How the Brain makes Coffee and dislikes Multitasking,” according to cognitive psychologist David Badre, a seemingly simple task is much more complicated than we think; making coffee involves a number of processes that are previously stored in our memory and this is being retrieved and held in our working memory as we are going about the given task. In this case, we are also dealing with sequencing as you need to put in the coffee before running the water, or else, you just end up with hot water.

But what happens when the unexpected intrudes and disrupts your whole procedure? What if the filter is not in its usual place, or worse, you have actually run out of filters? In such situations, your focus would shift toward the outer world where it is not about making coffee but finding a way of procuring the necessary bits and pieces to make it happen. Coffee, especially in the morning, is the tangible object we want to physically drink not to just imagine or think about.

In such situations, you may resort to creative thinking or even use your intuition to solve problems. In fact, that was the question I asked Kia. She told me it was a good one but at this point, she was looking at simpler tasks and experiments so that she could provide the facts and hard data on them.

Once these were fully established, the goal would be to do more complex sets of experiments to test such fascinating and more juicy (my word not hers) concepts and notions like creativity and intuition. Although inherently interesting, it is also admittedly much tougher to study.

It is great, however, that the groundwork is being set. In her lecture, she gave a number of experiments they had done, including some that involved retrocue tests and other studies that measured and studied tiny movements of the eye, and those ended up being moments where my selective attention zoned out and focused on other matters, so my memory and knowledge are hazy regarding these points.

The simple fact is that I did not find them interesting enough to warrant my attention. This is perhaps the main reason that I’m not a psychologist. The most interesting aspects of human nature are hard to pinpoint and prove in a matter-of-fact scientific way, especially since each individual is different and their inner world is inherently unique and not comparable to others. This has also been a failing, in my view, of Freud’s overall attempt to turn psychoanalysis into a science. But guess what? Oops, I did it again! I digressed.

Nonetheless, there are a few takeaways that I found most interesting in the 2025 Quinn Memorial Lecture that I would like to flesh out here. First off, as previously mentioned, it is not either/or, or one or the other but these shifts of attention can occur very quickly and even simultaneously. When crossing domains, it will have an effect on reaction time and there may be accuracy costs, and there are studies to prove that.

Furthermore, there is no “domain police” (Kia’s words) whereas other control functions and parameters may be at play. It may even be a battle or an interplay between external and internal domains. In other words, at times, they may be at odds, and at other odds, they may be working together hand-in-hand.

In the end, our brain wants to help us and help us figure things out. Another interesting bit about the brain that Kia mentioned is that the brain is frugal and super lazy. I shared that observation with my teenage son, and he agreed whole-heartedly with the finding from personal experience.

In fact, the brain does not want to waste energy and tries to do as little as possible to get things done. This is not necessarily a bad thing as there are a lot of things on the brain’s plate, so it tries to cut corners as much as possible. Yet, in certain situations, this may complicate things or lead towards actions that are not in our best interest.

For instance, when we need quick information, we may rely on experiences that may be too general, and in some cases, they may be inaccurate or not offer a whole story. We may pounce upon or hold onto salient images or perceptions in our mind that are not based on rigorous analysis but on vague feelings or impressions. In those cases, we may be vulnerable and susceptible to hear-say, gossip, or prejudices instead of taking the time and effort to look at the situation in a more objective, balanced, and reasonable manner.

A final thing that Kia mentioned in this talk is that essentially everything is in our head. This is because we perceive the world through our eyes, thoughts, and experiences. In fact, she admitted that there is nothing but inner world and that everything is essentially thought or experienced through and by each of us. Yet such essentially mystic musings would preclude any kind of scientific study, so we need to accept, confirm and reaffirm the outer world as a separate entity, which interacts with us in the same way that we interact with it.

And in that process, we learn and grow and gain knowledge and wisdom. But to do so, we ought to first overcome our inherent neuroscientific laziness, we need to accept that we do not already have all the knowledge and information at hand – that we do not know it all - and then, choose and select to be open and flexible to incoming information, stimulation, and experiences, these objects and moments in space and time.

The Sudden Awakening of Canada’s Slumbering National Pride

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Fri, 14 Mar 2025 20:06:00 +0000

These are strange times when one must not only state the obvious but also mean it and wholeheartedly stand by it: Canada is an independent sovereign nation. It is not a state of another country, it is not up for sale, and it wants to live in peace and harmony with its neighbors. The fundamental values of liberty, freedom of choice, equality, human rights, and democracy are not only cherished and valued here, but we know deep in our hearts and bones that they are worth fighting for.

Yes, Canada is relatively young and not a perfect country, but it has forged ahead with strong values and good and well-meaning intentions while also setting itself apart from its neighboring superpower by making conscious choices and efforts steeped in peacemaking and respect of other nations, cultures, and ethnicities with an official bilingual system and a living practice and emblem of multiculturalism.

There is lot to be proud of, and yet, it is rarely demonstrated or talked about in terms of national pride, for different reasons and under separate pretexts. As an immigrant to Canada, I was surprised to see how Canadians often downplayed and subdued national pride. Unlike their often boisterous and unapologetically proud neighbor, this northern side of the continent was rather humble and humbly modest.

Almost sixty years ago to the day, we officially adopted our red and white Maple Leaf flag but they were not waved about unless there was a serious international hockey game in the offing, and flags could be spotted here and there - albeit diminishing in recent times - on the first of July, Canada’s Day and a sort of counterpart to the July 4^th of our American neighbor - minus the grand festivities, the overflowing enthusiasm, and the fireworks.

Why do Canadians not embrace their nation more wholeheartedly, I asked myself, a previous asylum seeker who has grown up in Germany. Here in Canada, there seemed to be a block and reluctance to freely express national pride, as if Canadians were insecure about themselves and their nation or just incredibly shy to make any waves and as if they were uncomfortable putting themselves in the spotlight. Back in Germany, we would hear very little about this large country up north and would hence imagine snow-covered huts and cabins, waterfalls, diligent hard-working beavers, and lumberjacks hunting for bears.

And yet, this modest poise and calm seem like a cool outward veneer, a type of facade that could be punctured, and then erupt in wild and sudden outbursts, particularly during hockey games where bodychecks would be dispensed and delivered with glee and the gloves would be dropped; in fact, fighting has become a staple of this popular national sport.

Who could tell, especially if day in and day out, we would see Canadians everywhere apologizing for everything regardless of if they were at fault or not, and they would be walking on eggshells afraid of accidentally and even unconsciously offending others and avoiding microaggressions like the plague, except of course, the previously mentioned fighting in the ice rink, which was more bravura and fun and games than a blood sport.

This contrasted with the brash expression of Americans and the direct and upfront demeanor of Germans. With each of these nationalities, there would be not much mincing of words and especially with the former, there would be no shortage of personal, often unsolicited opinions no matter how outrageous they would seem to others. Germans in terms of their nationality and the expression thereof were heavily burdened by their horrible and devastating past and their flags would be the exclusive domain of international soccer games, their source of pride but also the vortex of pain considering the lack of success and accomplishments in recent times.

Yet the American dream and this lavish, carefree, and often careless lifestyle were filled with an enthusiasm, a sense of freedom and unfiltered patriotism that in some ways are the envy of many countries, including us here in Canada. Evidently, the American experiment is not without its flaws, detours, or shortcomings. The issue of race and the unconcealed practice of slavery as well as oppression of others tend to be ignored or brushed aside.

Moreover, the involvement in political wars and international affairs, be it Vietnam or the Middle Eastern wars are downplayed and even ignored, while the focus and attention are posited more on positive results and outcomes, be it their budding economy, their innovation, their steadfast and unwavering determination and the firm handheld belief that anything is indeed possible, and no dream is out of reach. These are commendable perspectives and attitudes as long as they are carefully calibrated, and checked and counterbalanced with the negative aspects and counterparts, the push and pull and gravity of truths and reality.

When it comes to Canada, we seem to have been carrying an invisible stain of guilt and shame all along and this exploded when news hit us regarding the atrocities of residential schools. No nation is perfect, and every country has its dark side and its bleak past, but this hit hard and temporarily sank the little pride that Canada still had in itself. The same way blindly believing in oneself despite and against the facts and reality can be detrimental to the psyche, being haunted and weighed down by feelings of guilt and shame are also harmful.

Over the past years, this has gone into overdrive with the implicit approval and even insistence of the government. Any person who was or could be oppressed was hailed as a hero and any who had privilege, whether merited or not, whether through their hard work or not, was seen as potentially evil or was seen as part of the problem. Not only would a large portion of the population be accused of engaging in “microaggressions” – a vague term that could be applied to pretty much anything - on a daily basis, but they would also be considered racist unless they were from a minority, who were incidentally given carte blanche and were automatically and a priori exempt from any potential blame or wrongdoing.

This led to an obsession and preoccupation of offending or slighting others that it became even frowned upon to wish someone Merry Christmas or for busses to support our local hockey team because anyone who did not like hockey would and could be potentially offended. This misguided relativism dilated, weakened, and undermined many of our traditions, practices, and even values, so we wished people happy holidays to be as inclusive as possible while ironically excluding large swaths of our population.

This untenable and unsustainable state continued, and people would even avoid saying “Happy Canada Day” as if the nation was a dirty word and needed to be eradicated and replaced with something else or a different name. Any citizen with an ounce of national pride would be cancelled or ridiculed and be “educated” and put on the supposedly right path and side of history.

All this continued and put in question our identity and values until our very own sovereignty and existence came under threat. It was a seeming running “joke” by the American president that was actually meant as a serious comment underlining and harboring a malignant intention of usurping this young country that has stood on its feet and has a strong reputation and standing in the world. Suddenly, we all woke up, put our elbows up and showed grit and stamina that no one, perhaps not even ourselves, thought we had.

Suddenly we realize that we have taken so much for granted as we have either wallowed in self-pity, shame and guilt or were divided and polarized, with all of this weakening our resolve, will, and confidence along the way. Yet this existential threat to our land and our home put us back on the map. We may have weakened but we remain strong and resilient, and we can come together and fight for our freedom and independence as we have done in the past and shall in the future.

Romanticizing versus Demonizing the Other: How the Left Was Lost and Where it Got Us

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 23 Feb 2025 22:14:00 +0000

Coming off two interesting back-to-back days in February, namely Valentine’s Day on February 14^th and National Day of the Canadian Flag on February 15^th, I have felt motivated (or rather driven/compelled) to write about certain issues that have been on my mind for quite some time while these two dates provide a good reason and convenient excuse to share them with you here.

They will be presented in two parts: The first one deals with the dangers and threats of romanticizing the past and others and it is something that is contributing tremendously to division and polarization in our common era, while the second will give an honest and unflinching look at Canadian patriotism (or lack thereof) as well as issues and potential threats around it, especially when viewed under the current political lens and climate.

As a self-professed (incurable?) romantic, love and romance have been close to my heart starting since early adolescence. Even my thesis has dealt with this topic, in fact, the potential threats, heartbreak, and disillusionment that can come with a distorted view on love and longing stemming from reading (and believing) romance and chivalrous novels whereas my most recent novella that I am putting the finishing touches upon is about the quest for true lasting love.

Yet the romantic ideal and the act of romanticization are not limited to love and romance alone; it can be part of a distorted perspective on reality, what is often referred to as seeing the world through rose-colored glasses. This may be in relationships where we only focus on what we want or wish to see within ourselves and others by only focusing on the positive aspects alongside the tendency of putting the other person on a pedestal and turning them into a goddess or a knight in shiny armor. Often, this dream or fantasy will clash with reality and turn to dust when we realize that these wishes have not been grounded in reality but are an offshoot of wishful or even toxic positive thinking.

Yet these rose-colored glasses can be applied to anything including a perspective that romanticizes the past, different lifestyles or even certain people. We talk about the “good old days”, but the view is often selective and distorted. Although certain things may have been better in comparison, there are still challenges that we would conveniently ignore, downplay, or disregard. It is a case of rearview confirmation bias where we only highlight points that correspond to our current view by shunning or ignoring anything that runs counter to that narrative.

It is true that life used to be different without technology and there are certain things we have lost along the way. Yet, at the same time, there is so much we have gained and so the discussion of the impact of technology on our lives must be taken in a balanced way and not be seen as a polarized or polarizing issue. We would like to have clear-cut answers, but things and life are messier and more complicated than that.

I have previously written about this romantic view not so much in the sense of romance but rather the romantic period where nature and the simple and "primitive" life was glorified to an unrealistic and even dangerous degree and level. It is essentially a naive and distorted view because in the case of wildlife, it can be utterly dangerous to assume that the animals are well-meaning, docile, and humane as was the tragic experience of the Grizzly Man and an implicit error in transcendentalism as a rule.

This distorted view is most prevalent and dangerous in the current mentality and approach regarding morality. In the past, religious groups would claim to have privileged access to the truth and assume that their morality was superior to anyone else’s. Essentially, those who were acting not only in “good faith” but also within the parameters of their chosen faith were expecting and counting on being rewarded in this life as well as the afterlife by gaining and fully deserving their entry ticket to paradise. On the other hand, everyone else would burn in hell, spend time in purgatory, desperately roam the heavens and the earth, or its equivalent.

As a result, whether consciously or not, these adherents of their chosen religion and dogma would adopt and embrace a holier-than-thou attitude in relation to others and everyone else not within their group and community. They would perceive themselves as having special status and being lifted in the eyes of their God or their divinity of choice. Although many religions preach tolerance and equality, in terms of morality, the other would still be seen and regarded as a heathen or an ignorant and primitive person.

This superiority complex or bigotry would be pronounced in those who embraced their belief with the most fervor and who would not allow for any compromise or concessions, firmly believing that their way was not only the right way but also the only way to be and live. In other words, in this extreme view, everyone else was considered wrong and there would be no middle ground or half-way compromise to speak of.

Now what used to be the purview and domain of religious fundamentals has been adopted by the secular far-left. It is the same playbook, minus religion or divinity. The perception that the view of this radical faction is the only and "correct" way of seeing things and that everyone else who opposes or even dares to criticize it is ipso facto a “heathen” (i.e. transphobic, racist etc.) and deserves to be excluded and shunned has been exemplified in what is commonly referred to as cancel culture. Again, no compromises, no concessions, no middle ground, not even a debate; it is our way or the highway and with it the death of your career, reputation or even your claim to personhood.

The most hardened religious and self-proclaimed social activists (aka warriors or heroes) would claim to know the truth and convert others by any means at their disposal to their uncompromising view; they would even use force, bullying, and physical, mental, and emotional violence to conquer others and to make them see for their own good that the zealous proclaimers of social justice are and always will be in the right.

Debate or open dialogue would not be engaged in and would be even shunned and discouraged as these self-evident facts and truths would not be open for debate. Yet the truth is, deep inside, the ardent zealots fear and suspect that it would expose the fallacy of their logic and expose the shaky foundation their dogma and subsequent actions are built upon, and hence, you would have to accept it or else be ex-communicated and essentially become a pariah.

Although community and inclusivity are underscored, neither of them is practiced in these cases. In fact, the group is an exclusively inclusive community of sorts, only those who agree on all the points are allowed to become a member and everyone else is denied entry or cancelled in the first place.

In fact, no one is immune to this, and every single individual goes through constant surveillance and a vetting process whether they are aware of it or not. It is like using a magnifying glass to find the most minor word or phrase that could be twisted around and taken out of context and be used against the given person. Anything you say could be used against you used to be applicable only to those who got arrested yet in the left-o-sphere it applies even retroactively to anything you have said and done starting from your childhood years. Ironically, those who claim to be tolerant tend to be the most intolerant of the lot, and they jump to conclusions and do not embrace innocent until proven guilty.

This is the perfect environment and breeding ground to eliminate any doubt or critical thinking and to foster and increase groupthink. It is not different from how totalitarian governments operate, be they communist or fascist in their outlook.

In this process, certain people are romanticized and by extension others would be demonized. The poor are entirely blameless and innocent and seen as the oppressed and victims of greed and injustice while the wealthy are the enemies as they are perceived as oppressors. Communism in fact is driven less by love for the poor but hatred against the rich and this is exemplified by the popular phrase of (wanting to) Eat the Rich, which also contains elements of envy towards them since the have-nots deep inside would love to have what they do not have.

On the other hand, fascism sees their own race as superior to all others and with the right to decide over them, scapegoat and blame ethnic groups and to mistreat or even kill them if deemed necessary. It is essentially a black and white issue as this view operates under the implicit assumption and belief that every single person from a given race is good or bad.

The Nazis themselves embraced and committed to their view and framework and believed not only that they were superior but also that everyone else was inferior. It is the holier-than-thou belief in action. As a result, the fascists in their twisted and distorted mind and way of thinking did not see themselves or their actions as evil; in fact, they thought that they were doing good and acting for the common good.

This relative morality supposedly gives them and other extreme groups the right to strip, limit or take away people’s humanity and rights with a potential “license to kill” under the guise of moral justice and superiority. This includes communists attacking the wealthy, colonists attacking indigenous people, terrorists from the right and the left as well as jihadists targeting infidels or traitors to the cause, the nation, and the environment, or vigilantes killing off people that they believe and deem to be undeserving of life.

Violence seems justified for one’s cause and beliefs and this is dangerous territory no matter how morally justified the action may seem in the mind of its proponents. The end just does not justify the means, and people’s rights, and humanity should never be stripped of them regardless of their gender, race, belief, or sexuality. It is unethical to treat women unfavorably, the same way, it is unethical to be biased against men, the poor, the wealthy, Jews, Muslims, Christians, heterosexuals, transsexuals, and anyone else. No one is better nor ought to be above anyone else or above the law. This is something we tend to overlook, downplay, or excuse when it is our side doing it but it is and should be universally applied.

We say love is blind but so is hatred. This hypervigilant, uber-romanticized and ultra-sanitized vision does not only stain the present but goes back in time while also moving into the future. Apart from seeing things merely in black and white through the lens of good and evil, it is myopic and very limited in scope and vision.

It is with sadness that I must note that the left has lost not only its path but also its collective mind. As someone who used to be supportive of their ideals and principles, and you can find it expressed here in this blog over the span of many years, I can only shake my head vis-à-vis the developments over the past years and like André Gide realize that it is not what it claims to be, and that its remedy may be even worse than the disease.

It is a misnomer that the left is progressive. It is not so no longer as it has renounced progress, advancement and technology and has stumbled over its own feet and become stagnant, rigid, set, and fixed in their views. Trying to erase the past, to change it, to mold it according to their likes and dislikes or even worse, to ignore it all together will only add to the problem and not solve a single thing. Often, this is done not to shed light, knowledge, and understanding but out of resentment with the aim to stoke and to fan hatred against certain targets, which tend to be the usual suspects, white, male, racist, Christian colonizers or women by the name Karen.

True diversity means including others you may not see eye to eye or agree with. And if everyone in your book is a racist, then the parameters of your definition must be flawed, or there may be blind spots you are not consciously aware of. This is not about the romantic view of good versus evil but rather of different groups that are at odds and even culturally at war with each other and the need to accept a compromise that is acceptable to both sides and which does not merely represent the desire of one group over the other.

It is in fact one thing that the left has lost, to work towards a world where everyone is truly seen as equal, and everyone is judged, according to Dr. Martin Luther King’s dream and vision, by the contents of their character while no one is judged (favorably or unfavorably) by the color of their skin.

Year-End Reflections: Continuing the Path of Transformation and Healing

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sat, 28 Dec 2024 23:40:00 +0000

Another year is ending; not much has changed from the outside, and yet this year has been an anomaly in a few ways and manners. 2024 began on one side of the fence, the familiar, the commonplace, the routine, the usual habits, and fears alongside a (long) list of grievances, complaints, wishes, and desires. In short, the usual and the typical push and pull that epitomizes New Year’s Resolutions, the wish and desire factors pinned against the real and practical with the usual suspects and culprits of more joy and less weight topping the good old (wish) list.

In that sense and from that viewpoint, nothing has apparently or effectively changed as life is flowing on the same path: I have not traveled nor switched jobs, I have not received a promotion (if my employer is reading this, please take note and hopefully also some action in this regard), I have yet to go viral or achieve overnight success, and my belly fat is still where it is at. All this time, true love, the one that knocks off your socks and takes you on a thrill ride remains as elusive as it has been since time immemorial.

Although the context and situations may look like they are business as usual, the inner world and the personally experienced emotions and reactions are not. Something has clicked, switched, and moved on a deep level. This has been part of a process that has been continuing and building over a period of years now (you can read about it here), but this year has most definitely accelerated it. When I compare myself to the person I was at the onset of the year, it feels like two different results or versions show up with the latter and updated one being the preferred, better, fitter, happier, and improved version so-to-speak.

It is perhaps the step right before synthesis, which is building upon and going beyond a mere plan, the illustrated map, the vision board, or setting willful intentions. It is like being ready for a trip: passport in hand (something that is only meant metaphorically here because despite good intentions, I have yet to submit the paperwork for my passport application!), with visa requirements and immunization all taken care of and the ticket fully paid for but still not sure where the destination is (or who the traveling companion will be), except that it is going to be an amazing and mind-blowing experience.

Put differently, you have made the gains but have not cashed them in yet; you have an awesome podcast that you have not monetized yet, or, and perhaps my favorite analogy here, you have picked the winning numbers but are yet to claim the grand lottery prize.

Add to this the necessary emotional and mental precursors and prep work that has already been covered and gone into it (i.e., getting rid of previous excess baggage though I am still missing or needing a few more items here and there in my metaphorical luggage) so that I am all in, psyched up and prepared for the giant leap into the unknown. The remaining gap can be somewhat reduced via intuition, a feeling that this or that would be the right thing to do despite not knowing exactly what it is that is heading towards me and/or that I am heading towards, barring that it could all be a matter of wishful thinking (though I fully wish it were not so).

I can only state that something outstanding is about or bound to happen and that I am looking forward to it. This is not only desire, the wish for something to happen and closing your eyes and crossing your fingers for it to appear but it also includes dotting the i’s with the internal and external hard work connected to this type of manifestation.

This is something that I have experienced to some extent in previously expressed wishes (right here on this blog as a matter of fact) that did indeed come true, yet we are talking about a whole different ballgame and arena here. I am going to get into some of the specifics in a bit, but for now, the best way I can explain it is this: you need to first create the necessary inner qualities to be able to materialize what you desire most until it can actually appear in front of you, a kind of master appearing when the student is ready type of scenario.

In terms of relationships, it is about clearing pervious trauma and negative experiences to not only see and feel things more clearly but to be able to take appropriate action and make better decisions from now on and going forward. In terms of jobs, it is not only having the necessary requirements in terms of education, skills, and experience but to round it out with a newly found confidence in yourself with the necessary dose of stamina and resilience.

You must first believe it deep within. It is all about dreaming big and finally being ready to respond to and act upon the given opportunities, to accept the marvelous gifts of the universe without second-guessing yourself or dousing it with feelings of guilt and unworthiness that often lurk in the shadows.

It is being yourself, true to your principles, authentic to your core values while also saying, nay shouting a big and uncompromising YES to life and to the universe. It is a sense of earned entitlement and deserved privilege that you embrace wholeheartedly not only for the good of yourself but by extension for the good of the community and the world around you.

One of the mistakes that many make here is comparing yourself to others. Although it can motivate and drive you and serve as a push to get you off the couch and do something, it is still misguided because they are them and you are you. It is not even a case of apples and oranges: the personalities and situations and circumstances are so different that you cannot possibly compare one with the other.

That said, there are still basic truths and rights that underlie us as humans and spiritual beings that apply to each and everyone. But again, it is more about core similarities than perceived differences. The truth is one and the same, but it is expressed and embodied in different ways and manners.

So much for the aspects of the soul and now a few things I would like to point out in terms of the specifications of how this transformation may be brought about. The main stumbling block is fear in all shapes, sizes, and formats: the fear of being yourself often counter-balanced against the fear of not being yourself, the fear of what others think of you, the fear of missing out and wasting your life, the fear of making a wrong decision, the fear of hurting others versus the fear of being hurt.

This list goes on and is unending, but it can be reduced to a common denominator: insecurity around being and loving yourself combined with concerns around being loved and accepted by others. It is also about lacking faith and confidence in yourself and constantly worrying about what may or may not occur in your life.

This has been my work in progress, but it has felt quite comforting to be able to work certain things out, at least in terms of processing them and clearing obstacles on the path ahead. One of the ways of doing it was also changing certain habits and patterns, that is simply doing things differently or doing different things.

I used to equate the gym with literal hell. I was adamant and stubborn about entering there over my dead body. And I meant it. Yet now, over the past months, I have been going about two or three times a week, and the oddest thing of it all is that I often look forward to it! That one I did not see coming but it helped to release the subconscious holds, brakes, and obstacles, and then be able to move forward more freely.

Another one was to socialize with others. That can be overwhelming but not so much, if you find yourself in groups that you enjoy and that appreciate you. For instance, I have signed up and shown up for regular French group meetings, then added on, a German language club, and it is amazing and magical to immerse yourself in these worlds and spaces and to connect with others without having to travel far and wide.

Not to mention the absolutely wonderful philosophy groups I regularly attend and where a community of like-minded and curious people discuss different topics and issues. It is enriching and stimulating not only because there is something to be learned from each session but to know that deep inside, we are all not that different from each other despite our differences in views, opinions, and philosophies. And yes, that we can get along if we wish to do so.

Finally, I would be amiss not to mention the awesome local writers’ group I began attending at the beginning of the year. I had previously attended a few other groups and had also created and run my own way back, but this one has been a goldmine. What I love about it is that it is a true community that cares about all types of writing and where they offer unflinching support while also delivering at times deliciously blunt and in-your-face (for the most part) constructive criticism. They are partly responsible for me picking up the proverbial pen and writing a few poems as well as a novella over this year.

So these are my reflections for a year that was promising with the promise of an even bigger year to come. It has been great to stimulate and build upon both the body and the mind to improve overall health and wellbeing. Most of all, I am most grateful for this year, which has brought its share of challenges, but also wonderful insights and great moments shared with others alongside a better appreciation of myself.

A Happy New Year to each and every one of you and a big thank you for visiting my blog and checking out my podcast!

The Lasting Impact with Some of the Best End Credit Songs

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Fri, 11 Oct 2024 17:50:00 +0000

Music and songs have always played an important role in filmmaking since its inception of the silent era. Whether it is a moving soundtrack or a well-placed song, music adds not only to individual scenes but to the entire movie and even beyond. We often recognize, identify, and associate movies with their unforgettable soundtrack; be it the themes of the Godfather, Lawrence of Arabia, or Love Story, the soundtrack takes us right back to the movie itself and is often intimately connected with our feelings and sensations experienced while watching the said film.

As someone who has grown up with music videos having been part of the glorious MTV generation, I especially appreciate it when filmmakers make effective and full use of this. The film may at times come off as a music video or worse a perfume commercial but in the right and capable hands, all this will make us feel elated. Not that music is always necessary as the Dogme 95 movement has demonstrated, yet it paints a vivid picture and adds push, drive, and adrenaline as seen and experienced rather memorably in films like The Social Network or even Challengers (a shoutout to the talented duo of Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross).

Yet, I believe that end credit songs are equally important and relevant to the movie experience, and they may be somewhat underrated or downplayed in their overall effect and influence of the movie itself. This is rather a type of after effect or of coming together of sorts. It can also accentuate or emphasize certain emotions either experienced throughout the film or be intimately connected to a given protagonist. I will briefly discuss a handful of end credit songs that I found lasting and impactful and that have significantly enriched my movie experience. Here we go in no particular order:

Suicide in Civil War

No, not the Marvel movie. Sure, that one was quite good and impactful but not as heart-wrenching as Garland’s depiction of what a (second!) American civil war would look and feel like. To be honest, I hated the film at my initial viewing; when it was over I thought it was mediocre at best. The plot was nonexistent, it was random scenes connected to a misguided road trip, snapshots of a conflict that was never fleshed out alongside characters that were one-dimensional; the dialogue was not well-crafted and not really memorable, and the ending was just dark and pointless.

That may have been the point you might rightly point out as the characters, both new and seasoned reporters and journalists are just taking note and documenting events outside of their control via the medium of pictures. This is undertaken perhaps for posteriority, out of curiosity, or simply for themselves, a type of self-gratification. Yet, before we get to the final shot, not unpredictably another still, there is the intro of a song that feels out of place and yet at the same time precisely augments and elevates the feelings of despair expressed in the movie.

The song in question was by a band I had not heard of before but it has been rather influential. Their name is characteristically Suicide, and the lyrics are simple but effective in their simplicity: dream, baby, dream. There was devastation, death, and destruction throughout the film’s running time, and then the film ends on rhythms that may have come from a second-rate synthesizer with lyrics that could have been penned by a high school student. In other words, it was baffling and utterly brilliant.

In fact, I had to look up the song and got a Google alert due to the band’s name and then I put it on repeat, listening to it countless times. As I was doing so, the final scene from the movie started replaying in my mind and I began to appreciate its deliberate tone and overall message. It literally helped me change my mind and feelings towards the movie and I saw what Garland was trying to show us here. In fact, it turned out to be a movie that must be watched especially in the background and context of today’s world, politics, and polarization.

Although some have criticized the film for not taking sides, I believe those critics missed out on the whole point (yes, it did have a point after all!), namely, to show us and document the brutality, callousness, and evil of a civil war and that it would not be in any way or manner a glorified war or a glorious revolution. No, all we would get is mayhem, chaos, death, and destruction, and the end of a once beautiful and promising nation. But as the song points out, we should not lose our ability to dream, baby, dream of a better future and a better more peaceful world despite it all.

Sinnerman in Inland Empire

Now Lynch’s Inland Empire was a baffling movie and that is a serious understatement. It also means a lot especially considering that we often equate the word “mind-bending” with this filmmaker whose films have pushed envelopes, boundaries, and our imagination, and which often represent Kafka’s worst nightmares reimagined on the screen. Throughout, his movies have been scored by the outstanding composer Angelo Badalamenti, whether it is the sad melancholic opening piece for Blue Velvet or the jazzy but equally sad and yearning intro of Fire Walk With Me.

Yet nothing compared to the ending of Inland Empire. This may be a spoiler except first, there is nothing to spoil here, and second, nothing really happens and yet everything does. The driving song is “Sinnerman” by Nina Simone, and we see characters coming together not as characters but as actors portraying them.

It is dark but weirdly uplifting and, in a way, there is a sense of catharsis not in a clear and direct way but rather in a surreal unconscious way and form. Suddenly, everything comes together, the monkeys, though random, somehow make perfect sense, and we understand on a nonverbal level why there were talking bunnies, and the film feels complete as a result.

The counterpoint and statement of this well-chosen song brings it all home and ties up the different knots or rather unties them for us and give us a full picture. Perhaps any other ending would have made me feel that I had just wasted a good three hours of my life on a movie that was disjointed and all over the place. But that was not the feeling I left with, courtesy of the vibrant and memorable song of “Sinnerman.”

This House is…. The House

The House is yet another surreal experience woven around the concept of a… house. It is stop-motion animated and consists of three short films that are in no discernible way connected to each other and that each feel different as they take place in different time periods and more importantly in different houses made by different filmmakers.

The first one is more like a traditional goth horror story set in the 1800s; the second one, a bizarre real estate interaction set in the 2000s involving various rats, which goes horribly and devastatingly wrong as the place becomes infested with bugs and insects (don’t ask), and the third one set in a (more or less) distant future, which ranges from anthropomorphic cat renters from hell to renters from another spiritual realm during an upcoming end-of-world disaster.

Although each vignette was well-made, I was wondering what the point of this anthology was. Then I heard the final song. It was not only thematically linked to the house and delineated the difference between a house and a home, but it was in the voice (literally) of one of the characters.

It was the second film’s real estate developer played by Jarvis Cocker singing as an anthropomorphic rat musing about how a house was nothing but a building, just a number of bricks put together, whereas a home was where the heart was. And suddenly, the house transformed into an important symbol of both estrangement and feeling at home, and I could not help but to love and appreciate how the film somehow with the aid of this final song managed to connect three random stories into one.

Hoist that Rag in A Most Wanted Man

A Most Wanted Man was very good throughout, but the final scene played brilliantly by Philip Seymour Hoffman, such a huge and irreplaceable loss to the world of cinema, summed up despair, frustration, and desperation in palpable ways. The song by Tom Waits only underscores the feeling of helplessness of someone being played by higher forces or simply forces that are outside of one’s control.

In the film, we see how the protagonist tries hard to make things work and to gain credit and recognition only to have everything unexpectedly snatched away from him in the last minute. He steps out the car, drives along but you can sense his nervousness and anger, and then it all ends and culminates in the mesmerizing Tom Waits song. I think of this character whenever I hear this song; they are intricately linked together in my mind, and at the same time, I realize how much I miss this towering acting legend who left us much too soon!

Honorable Mentions

I would like to finish with three honorable mentions. First off, Tarantino’s rather mediocre Death Proof, arguably one of this worst and least interesting films (I did like Jackie Brown but had strong reservations when it came to The Hateful Eight), but this grindhouse film ends with a brilliant piece of filmmaking and a catchy punchy end song.

It feels quite liberating and feminist as the women joyfully and gleefully take revenge on the perpetrator played coolly by Kurt Russell with the Serge Gainsbourg song "Chick Habit" in the background (originally “Laisse tomber les filles”) that is a warning to better not mess with girls (in its original not to play with an innocent heart) as they could just like that come back and bite you and even kick you in the head before you know it. This ending elevated what was a rather bland and uninteresting film when viewed and considered by Tarantino’s standards.

Then there is a Dogville that not unlike Inland Empire made us think what the hell we had just watched until the pulsating tune of “Young Americans” by David Bowie appears with images from the civil rights movement, and we suddenly understand that the film was criticizing and commenting on various elements of American history, culture, and mentality. And just like that we find ourselves back at square one.

Authenticity, Role-Playing and Leading Double Lives in Bertolucci's Last Tango in Paris

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 25 Aug 2024 17:18:00 +0000

One of the movies that had been on my watchlist for a very long time, we may be even talking decades here, is Bernardo Bertolucci’s notorious and controversial Last Tango in Paris. Bertolucci was known to often push the envelope, yet in this case, it may have backfired a bit. It seems that the film got a lot of attention and publicity for the wrong reasons and for its somewhat shallower and superficial aspects, which overshadowed its different strengths alongside the depth expressed in this idiosyncratic film.

The frankness and vulgarity can feel shocking and even jarring to this day, whereas the graphic nature and the explicitness in terms of sexuality fail to compare with other films that have radically pushed ahead and passed and surpassed many taboos and boundaries since the inception of this film. Arguably, this may have been due to the existence of Bertolucci’s groundbreaking Tango and let us not forget that famed French enfant terrible filmmaker Catherine Breillat appears briefly in it; still, there is more than meets the eye and much more to this movie than its controversy.

In fact, the strength of this film lies in what it has to say about its characters and their relationships with themselves and with others, including but not solely pertaining to issues of sexuality and the physical expression thereof. Furthermore, the film brings up and touches upon various themes that play with notions of reality versus fiction, lived versus imagined lives, and wishful thinking versus the reality of things. On the surface, it is an anti-romantic and anti-idealistic film but somehow it ends up holding and containing certain elements and seeds of romance and idealism within its dark heart.

To further explore this, the symbol of the double is of relevance. Interestingly, the word double has in fact two meanings. On one hand, it is a copy or mirror image of something or someone, while on the other hand, it is a splitting and separating into two, which may contain unequal or unwanted parts.

In the first instance, we have a type of doppelganger, someone who looks, acts or thinks as we do. The focus is on similarities, which can be eerie in some cases, and it is not unlike being identical twins. A cinematic equivalent of this would be Kieslowski’s The Double Life of Veronique where it seems that the same person is simultaneously living in two different parts of the world (Weronika in Poland and Veronique in France) as a type of carbon copy or duplicate of the other. This double life is as if the same soul had been split into two equal or equivalent parts of the self with each leading its own separate existence miles apart.

Yet sometimes, the double is the shadow or the shadowy self, the parts within us we don’t acknowledge or do not wish to, and this has been exemplified in the push and pull of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, for instance. The personalities lead a double life as there are two different sides to them that for one reason or another are hard to reconcile within the same person and their shared environment.

In fact, the art of filmmaking falls somewhere between both realms. Some filmmakers may create an alter ego, a character that shares many similarities with its creator, say Guido in Fellini’s 8 ½. At the same time, no matter how faithful the representation may be of the real person or real things and events, the film only manages to reflect them and can only be based on them as it is not able to fully and accurately capture the entirety, the same way a snapshot does not give us the full picture.

The problem is that the event cannot be identical with its representation, no matter how hard one tries, and the closest you can come to a potential replica would be to do a documentary on it; and yet, focus, editing, and other filmmaking choices can slightly - or significantly - distort the issues and facts at hand.

Let us now discuss the different doubles and their reflections, deflections, and mirror images in Bertolucci’s film. Please be aware that from now on there will be major spoilers and do proceed at your own caution. You can of course watch the film first and then return but again, you may need to proceed with caution.

The Double Life of Paul

The main protagonist played by Marlon Brando creates a double life for himself. His wife has just committed suicide, and he feels angry, lost, and in limbo. He is looking for a place to stay and then meets Jeanne by accident. It is not that he is sexually attracted to her (at least not initially) as he shows little interest in her or anybody else for that matter. Both are just taking or filling up space in an apartment that feels as dark and gloomy as Paul’s soul.

Yet suddenly and with little warning, he grabs her and makes love to her. It is instinctual and animalistic and has very little to do with any type of feeling. She goes along and does not resist him. Then both walk out, each their own way. But something lingers within each of them, so they decide to continue meeting for these clandestine sexual trysts, but he sets the ground rules from the beginning.

It is essential, he proclaims, to stay away from personal details and information with absolutely no names whatsoever. Each would remain anonymous in this artificial space, and they would agree to never meet outside of the confines of the apartment. After a while, Jeanne finds this frustrating as she has become curious about this strange enigmatic man. Oddly enough, it is this air of mystery that makes him so appealing to her. It is not difficult to see and understand why she is intrigued by Paul, especially after we meet her fiancé, the bland and self-absorbed Tom. But more about their relationship later.

As to Paul, he is grieving but he also displaces his anger, frustrations, and personal failings upon this young woman who has happened to cross his path at an importune time. He is cruel to her at different points of their time together. This makes Jeanne uncomfortable and yet she keeps returning to him and continues taking the abuse and humiliation that he inflicts upon her. This reaches its most extreme point when he anally rapes her while spouting nonsensical phrases about family and religion.

When taken in conjunction with his request to being fingered by her and then spouting vile and disgusting images of pigs and bestiality involving Jeanne, it made me wonder whether the character had been abused by the clergy. In another scene regarding his wife’s funeral arrangements, Paul vehemently opposes his mother-in-law to have priests present at the service while in another scene he almost beats up a man while angrily calling him a “faggot.” There may be homosexual tendencies or traumatic experiences that these scenes and situations insinuate or point towards, especially when taken and considered in connection to each other.

The sexual frustration and the double motif also existed on the side of his wife. For a handful of years, she, the hotel owner was living with one of the guests, an ordinary and insipid-seeming man called Marcel. In fact, she turned him into a stand-in Paul as she got matching bathrobes for each and re-lived and re-enacted similar or the same routines with either one of them.

The scene where both Paul and Marcel are sitting next to each other in identical bathrobes after the suicide of their respective wife and lover has a surreal touch to it; it also underscores the hinted double life that Rosa had during her marriage with Paul. Her lover Marcel went along with the charade and did not counteract or oppose Rosa’s wishes and desires. Soon enough, the passion ran out, but they still pretended to be a duplicate version of the joyless marriage she had with Paul who was residing a few hotel rooms away from there.

After Paul, in a moving and emotionally stunning scene, pours out his heart to the corpse of Rosa surrounded by an array of flowers and with make-up on her pale motionless face, he seems to change his air. Suddenly, he comes to or becomes more himself and then passionately pleads Jeanne to stay with him. Jeanne who up to then had merely been a projection of Rosa with all his bottled-up hatred and resentment aimed at her suddenly becomes a different person to him. Although he had previously turned her down and even mocked her for confessing her love to him, he now wants to start anew and begin an actual relationship with her.

At this point, Paul breaks all his made-up rules, goes up to her on the street, gives his name, tells her his age and that he is a widow and that his wife has committed suicide. All these intimate details pour out in a frenzy and in less than a minute. He also shares with her later that he owns a hotel and that he would now like to be and live with her.

This sudden move has its opposite effect. Jeanne may realize that she was never in love with him but that she rather loved the persona, this fictious double that he had created for her. As a result, she loses interest and decides to break up their relationship (or whatever it was that they had previously). Instead, she prefers to get married to Tom. In typical fashion, Paul cannot accept this and starts chasing her down the streets of Paris in another surreal scene that borders on the comical in its emotional overreach and intensity.

Before the film and Paul, the American, reach their respective end in her Parisian apartment, I would also like to point out the fact that Brando did not stick to the script but added his own flourishes and lines throughout the movie. The infamous and humiliating use of butter, something that the actress Maria Schneider had not been aware of was indeed his idea. There are other lines that stand out and look and sound improvised and probably were not part of the script.

Instead of simply being an actor that plays the character, Brando was modifying the role as he went along by adding a more personal dimension to Paul. This is Paul as imagined by Bertolucci and reinterpreted by the actor Marlon Brando. The alter ego becomes another double that is split apart from what the original character was supposed to be like and this occurs and evolves during the process of acting and filmmaking.

The Double Life of Jeanne

Jeanne seems like a person full of energy and zest for life who has unfortunately settled for an artificial relationship with wannabe filmmaker Tom played by Jean-Pierre Léaud. In this sense, I cannot help but think of Bertolucci, the director who is trying to express his desires, wishes, and fantasies alongside his pain and confusion via the medium of images, words, and sounds.

Yet, there is a hint of criticism there as Tom is as shallow and vapid as they come. He does not seem capable of true feelings and in fact lives in a world of fantasy in which there is nothing else but he himself and the movies. This can be seen from the moment they first appear together where he wants his crew to film everything they say and do, no matter how private and confidential. She is, according to him, the main subject of his next film.

There are various other scenes in which he supposedly explores Jeanne’s childhood and past including her first experiences of love and romance, but it is serving only the purpose of making an “authentic” documentary-style film. In this case, what is real is turned upside down and is put on its head. Although Jeanne expresses her feelings, he is less interested in her than capturing all this to make a movie out of it. It is exploitative in nature and serves only his own purposes instead of appreciating and respecting her feelings.

In that sense, Jeanne is just a character he happens to marry for the intents and purposes of making a movie about a man who decides to get married to a woman like Jeanne. He does not explore her because he is not interested in her as a person while he himself has little if anything to offer because he does not have a self or personality to speak of.

What is it that Bertolucci intended to say or show with this film? Part of it is of course the desire to make a film that pushes boundaries but also it talks about how we create doubles in different shapes and forms in our lives. It could be a double of ourselves, where he split into two seemingly incompatible beings, Paul in his two versions, Jeanne as Paul’s lover and Tom’s fiancée, Rosa as Paul’s wife and Marcel’s lover.

In each of these cases, this lack of authenticity creates a vacuum that accentuates the pain and suffering underlying each life. At the same time, since each of them fails to connect with their own nature, they are incapable of connecting with other people and their relationships become a bundled mess that lacks honesty, integrity or any type of sincere feeling or sentiment.

Final Thoughts?

In the end, we can create works of art via sublimation, but we must be aware to distinguish one from the other or at least not get confused between the two. Reality is a tricky thing and the moment you try to capture it, it seems to fly off the handle. Yet at the same time, we do not want to live in a world that is purely of our own making; we ought to rather find or settle for a comprise and integration of the two while continuously trying to find or be ourselves or remain authentic to what we believe to be our true nature.

Otto Rank and Thoughts on Individuality, Education, and Indoctrination

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sat, 27 Jul 2024 20:26:00 +0000

All absolute viewpoints, positions, and actions are fallacious; moderation is the key to everything, and we ought to question all things and matters. Although I believe in that statement, I am also aware of its inherent fallacies and contradictions. It is in and by itself what it claims to denounce, and it is like the statement that reflects on itself by saying that this statement is true. In other words, it is an absolute statement that wishes to eliminate or at least sow some doubts into all statements, beliefs, and thinking that are deemed absolute but at the same time, it is essentially and inherently a paradox in and of itself.

Secondly, this also underscores the importance of moderation and although we can counter that the practice and statement itself should be also taken in moderation, i.e. everything to be taken in moderation including moderation itself, yet it should be seen as a more balanced way of refraining being taken or rather being taken in by any radical one-sided viewpoints and lifestyles. Lastly, we should question everything including questioning whether we should question all things, or not. The main aim here is not to confuse or play with words but to point to serious issues and reach some potential and hopefully clearer understanding of them.

Otto Rank in his book Beyond Psychology points at the internal conflict and dilemma of the educational system, which at the same time becomes a microcosm and symbol of the paradox of human existence. On one side, education aims at general knowledge and the formation and development of the self, as in the inspirational Greek call for self-discovery, namely, to search for and “know thyself.”

Yet on the other hand, there must be necessary limits, restraints, and compromises for society to co-exist together in relative peace and harmony, a type of social contract or acceptance of laws and responsibilities to be able to live together. This is the other aim of education to help and guide us by living the life the way we want while also balancing it with accepting and respecting others to be able to do the same. It is individuality pitted against social conformity, or the individual good versus the common good, and education is the playground where this is played out.

It is a balancing act between what Otto Rank calls the psychology of difference versus the psychology of likeness and it affects us all in one way or another. We want to stand out and be different in terms of our own personality and ways of thinking and being, yet not to the extreme idiosyncratic degree where we would have nothing in common with others. We do need others not only as a foil or point of comparison, but we need them in the sense of our own identity formation be it via groups, clans, nations, families etc. all making part of that which we personally identify with.

It is an existential push and pull (the duality of being an individual) and if taken to its extreme on the side of individuality it can lead to eccentric behavior at best and utter madness at its worst, while conformity in its extreme would strip us of everything that makes us unique, and we would, again at its worst and most extreme, be nothing but a mindless cog in the machine or a humanoid instead of a full-fledged human being.

Education finds itself at this crossroad. On one hand, at least ideally, it wants to help us put ourselves on the path of self-discovery to find ourselves and to bring out not only our unique ways of being but aid us in expressing this via speaking and writing and to guide us towards thinking for ourselves, commonly referred to as critical thinking. That said, I much prefer the term thinking outside of the box and in that sense to be authentic, steadfast, and even revolutionary in one’s own thoughts and viewpoints.

Yet, left on its own and unharnessed, this could potentially lead to chaos and dissonance, and even further left field to anarchistic tendencies, hence education wants to also help us maintain and adhere to social order. This is not meant in the fascist or communist sense but rather as its opposite, to uphold democracy and democratic tenets and not to give sway to forms of totalitarianism of any stripe or color.

As Otto Rank put it, communism and fascism are two sides on the same coin. It is in either case, a denial of freedom and choice by means of force and violence. In communism, the ideology that we are all the same and equal is enforced and imprinted upon everyone whereas individual difference is not only frowned upon but intentionally stifled.

In the case of fascism, we have the opposite end of the spectrum; it is the individual and their differences that are underscored alongside the belief that a given collective group, entity, and ethnicity is not perceived as equal and as a matter of fact deemed superior to others. In both situations, the individual and their rights and choices are disregarded and trampled upon for the sake of what each ideology sees as the common good.

Education plays a crucial and often unspoken role in all of this by ways and means of indoctrination. Ideologies are then inserted, consciously or unconsciously, into the curriculum or the institution. Education ought to be free of any politics or ideologies but, in practice, this is often a different story. A particular ideology may hold sway at a given time and/or in a certain environment, and, as such, the school or university would not be educating people anymore but molding and even brainwashing them.

This is not limited to the realm of education but also applies to psychology. The current norm is upheld as a golden standard and everything that goes against it in one way or another is shunned. The individual who does not fit the particular mold is then fashioned and molded to get rid of the parts that are in conflict with it. This could be achieved via different means and methods, ranging from medication, institutionalization, or on a more common basis, by changing thoughts and views through cognitive therapy. The given patient or client is adjusted and re-adjusted to what is considered to be the current standard of sanity or normalcy.

Certainly, in many cases, this is indeed helpful and necessary as I would not want to state absolute statements or throw the baby out with the bathwater. Yet, the problem lies exactly in the mistaken belief that one’s view is and must be absolutely correct, whether we are talking about the patient, the psychiatrist, or the mental health expert.

This can be evidenced in what was considered abnormal in the past, including any difference or deviation in terms of sexuality or sexual preferences. What was considered abnormal and even illegal has become more accepted and commonplace because our views, values, and ways of thinking have changed. We have in addition to the conflict between the self and the other, the individual and society, another factor that is rigidity versus openness and flexibility.

That is another element of a delicate balancing act, and it should be a staple not only in psychology, politics, and education but also a personal practice of each and every one to move from fixed beliefs and mindsets to one of curiosity and empathy so that one is not held captive or hostage by the latest trends and fashions of the day.

Change is a constant that we experience in our daily life but at the same time, we are often enticed and driven to latch onto the most current view by eschewing anything that went before because we feel we are at a vantage point, which we deem superior to the previous one. Regardless of the truth and value of this, issues may arise when this is done in a radical and absolutist way and by denying or ignoring the necessary nuances and considerations that come with it.

You may also be interested in the following post and the podcast below:

Otto Rank The Soulful Psychoanalyst: From Psyche to Beyond Psychology

The Work, insights, Influence, and Legacy of Otto Rank with Robert Kramer and Kirk Schneider

On Labels, Boxes, and Memes: Being Open and Non-Judgmental

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Tue, 09 Jul 2024 21:08:00 +0000

Most of the time and throughout our lives, we tend to label things and people. It is a natural tendency of the brain to organize and structure information, which aids memory, learning, and retrieval. We need to define and classify the input to make sense of the data points and information and then to expand and expound upon them.

Labelling per se and on its own is neither good nor bad but it is generally efficient. Imagine going to a nameless store that has no labels whatsoever on any of its products. Where the heck are you at? What kind of meat or cereal are you buying? What’s inside the given product? Does it contain any allergens, gluten, or trans fat? And how much does it cost?

Many years ago, when I was working at a store, someone had mislabeled the price of an electronic item. It turned out that it was at a significantly reduced price. The person’s accidental error came at a cost for the store, but it was an unexpected boon and surprise for its clients who walked out smiling and grinning from end to end with the afore-mentioned item in hand.

Now my memory is a bit hazy on this matter, but I sincerely hope it was not an error of mine as there were times when I was not at the cash till but was designated to price items, a rather monotonous and mindless activity that lacked interaction of any kind. I also hope the store’s manager does not read this. It is highly unlikely but stranger things have happened indeed.

Hence, when it comes to labels, we want to make sure and verify to the best of our knowledge that the information is accurate and true. As an avid reader of cereal boxes, I found the details provided to be somewhat educational as I would learn about the breakdown of vitamins and minerals in relation to portions as well as how all this would change with the addition of skimmed milk.

Yet as a high school student, I was shocked to find out that anything that ended with -ose was essentially sugar. Why not be honest and upfront and label it as it is without trying to trick and deceive us? Sugar by any other name would taste as sweet, and we should not overlook, kid ourselves, or dilute the fact that most cereals are sugary in nature and purpose.

Yet, even when labels are correct, they may have adverse effects and repercussions, especially when they are put on living beings. The label that most of us tend to be comfortable with and often willingly and consciously identify with is our profession. Although it is a label that we generally accept and perhaps embrace, we may wish to peel it off during our off times.

Yet some jobs are considered constant and on a 24/7 basis. This applies to police officers and medics, for instance. They appear to never have an off switch as they are constantly thinking and are always preoccupied with health and safety. When someone is in medical distress, we call out for a doctor; when there is a violent incident, it is police officers who instinctively act and react often without thinking as it is their second nature.

On the other hand, we would blame either one of them on civic and moral grounds for not interfering or intervening despite them being off work at the time the same way we would reproach a lifeguard for not intending to save a drowning person on their break or day off.

As a language instructor, my cases tend to be much lower stakes, but I have been able to help tourists and foreigners with directions or with expressing their thoughts and wishes at different agencies and offices. At times, I may not feel so inclined – again we are not talking about emergencies or urgent situations – and I feel only slightly guilty afterwards, but occasionally I may not feel like helping others out despite having the ability to do so. That should not be an issue on moral grounds though most of the time, I tend to help and do oblige willingly.

This gets juicier and even more interesting when it comes to psychologists. The moment you mention that profession, people tend to tense up, hold their breath and visibly swallow. The assumption is that these professionals may be able to see through us, read our minds, or more realistically, infer and get information from our words and behaviors. The ones who have secrets they prefer to keep hidden under the rug or locked up in the closet will not feel free or willing to continue the conversation at that point.

But what I wish to express here is not just how jobs and professions affect others but the labels that come with them and the effects all of this has on us and on our psyche. Some of these labels seem permanent. Once you are a police officer, you will always be one. You may say that you are an ex-cop, but something generally remains.

An ex-doctor is something you rarely hear; we might say that the person is not practicing any longer, but it is not something you can or would want to just shake off. And then, on the other side of the spectrum, there are spies, drug lords, and criminals who cannot or would not divulge or talk about what they do for a living and must come up with lies and tales to cover it up.

Job labels can come at a cost as we can see, yet they are, of course, not the only type of labels we must cope and deal with. There are labels and stigmas associated with our gender, sexual orientation, marital status, ethnicity, nationality, age, religion and political beliefs, to name a few. Sadly, these tend to be fixed and inflexible and are often filled and peppered with hearsay, anecdotes, and stereotypes. There are often untested and unexamined assumptions and preconceived notions associated with each of these labels.

Apart from the labels that we carry and that we may or may not identify with, there are also those that we impose upon ourselves. We may come to see ourselves as a product of them and not feel free in our choices and decision-making. For instance, I may feel pressure to conform to the lack of punctuality of my ethnic group so that I do not stand out like a sore thumb or offend others who expect me to arrive late.

This is evidently a rather humorous example of the link between label, expectation, and peer pressure; nonetheless, there are much more serious cases and occasions where people go or feel they have to go against their own nature to appear a certain way so that they can gain approval or avoid and circumvent disapproval.

Labels are like fashion, and they can change, or new ones can be created anytime. When I was growing up, people who dressed or acted oddly or who tended not to be in conformity with the norms of society were seen as weird and labelled rather pejoratively as “weirdos”.

Flash forward to our modern day and age, and they are not seen as outcasts but are essentially celebrated as heroes that everyone must accept for inclusivity’s sake; they are even put on pedestals so that others (feel pressured to) emulate them. People may claim they are being progressive and liberal-minded by removing all labels whatsoever but, as a matter of fact, they are just replacing one label with another, while, for better or for worse, they encourage discriminating and going against anything that is not weird, i.e. the norm in this case. No, there is nothing wrong with being normal or even slightly boring and mundane.

The one place in which labels continue to have negative effects as they box people in and where despite goodwill and intention only little advance has been made is that of mental health. There is an equal tendency of completely going the other way of seeing (or at least claiming and pretending to see) mental illness as normal, which is too extreme and harmful both to the individual and to society at large. It is not akin to celebrating obesity for the sake of aesthetics and inclusivity while ignoring, disregarding or even turning a blind eye to the myriad health risks and complications that are associated with that condition.

Although things have somewhat improved and people talk more openly about their emotional and psychological struggles and feel generally less conflicted about seeking help to maintain, boost, and improve mental health, this has been of course also exploited or taken advantage of by many and for different, often harmful and nefarious purposes.

For many, mental health has become an empty word, a slogan, an excuse, or a political rallying cry. We are far from fully accepting it and of taking away the stigma and label attached to it but, at least, we are more aware of it, and it has become a topic of conversation instead of immediately being swept under the rug or rapidly dismissed.

Labels may designate the box, but they are not the box. In any ways, labels are just that, yet we exaggerate their importance and relevance and feel boxed in. We are then afraid to think outside of the box but rather feel restricted in our thinking and behavior and essentially vis-à-vis our unique way of being. Conformity can create the feeling and illusion of harmony, but it comes not only at an individual cost of freedom, but it is also not something that is healthy especially if done over a prolonged time.

Notwithstanding, these same labels and boxes have now become a meme. A meme can be anything that goes viral, that is, it is repeated on a seemingly endless loop without much thought or consideration. It is the modern earworm where notes seem to get stuck in our head whether you enjoy them or not. The same way, not only images and posts can become memes but also words, ideologies, or ways of thinking.

Not only are they being accepted and taken as is, but they are also endlessly and mindlessly repeated until we give up and accept and embrace them, be it consciously or unconsciously. This goes hand in hand with Nazi propaganda claiming that for others to come to accept a certain falsehood, it is important to bombard them with it on a continual basis, i.e. drill them with carefully chosen and selected memes. These memes then become lodged in our brain and are not based on critical thinking nor are they checked for their level of truth or falsehood, but they become stuck and keep crawling in our heads like the earworms of old.

This is not a political issue of left versus right as propaganda and falsehoods are perpetuated by both sides on the spectrum if not at the same level and quantity. They further undermine our freedom of action and thought and the expression of certain ideas that soon become taboo. This leads to a type of self-censorship and peer pressure in which many do not utter certain words or unpopular statements out of fear of retribution or attacks.

It also makes some scientists and researchers either willingly drop research interests due to their potentially polemic nature or in other cases when they attempt to do so, there will be no funding or grants for that line of research for the very same reasons. In such cases, the box is synonymous with a noose muzzling and even killing not only research and science but also putting a stranglehold on creativity and humor.

The consequence of all this is ironic. In a time that we are claiming to be most diverse, we are less so. In a time when we claim to be open-minded, we become more bigoted. In a time when we claim to stop judgments, we are being judgmental. In a time where we claim to abolish boundaries and combat stereotypes and prejudice, we essentially foster and encourage them.

It is more than ever important to embrace and feed our creativity and to not let ourselves be boxed in by thinking outside of the box. In fact, the box represents our own limits and limitations that we and others have set for ourselves. We can choose to accept the labels and boxes, or we can discard them and connect with who and what we truly are.

Labels are just that; they do not compare to the actual product. At best, they would be the trailer to the movie, but you are the real thing and are not the label unless you choose to identify as such. If it helps, you can expand a label to become a box. That way, it would be less limiting because a label sticks to you but with a box you have at least some legroom and you a have a bit more freedom. Plus, boxes come in different shapes and sizes and can be easily expanded.

And as you are considering and weighing your options and responses, you would do well to take things easy and take them with a grain of salt. Moreover, allow yourself to have a good time, to enjoy the process and the journey, and, most importantly, remind yourself to have a good laugh every now and then.

Don’t Bank on it: Neoliberalism with its Reckless Pursuit for Money and Financial Gain

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 23 Jun 2024 05:21:00 +0000

Before reading the insightful and eye-opening book “The Quiet Coup: Neoliberalism and the Looting of America” by Mehrsa Baradaran, I was under the impression that neoliberalism is synonymous with capitalism. Part of it is because neoliberals have presented themselves in a broad light and they have touted not only market freedom with healthy and productive competition, hallmark signs of capitalism but also claiming to be free and independent from government control and intervention.

Yet when I think of freedom, it is essentially democracy that comes to mind in which people are the emblems of the society, nation, and community and, as a result, they keep politicians accountable for their decisions, seek transparency and demand honesty from the elected members of the parties. The views and opinions of the people enshrined in the constitution as a collective “we” would matter because they are (or at least ought to be) the ones that are calling the shots and that select and determine who is going to be at the helm of the government.

Yet since the coup of neoliberalism, there has been more instead of less government intervention; the laws have been surreptitiously tipped in favor of the big corporations. At the same time, because there are fewer legal limits and limitations, there is less pressure and accountability on the side of these corporations, and they have become – or at least they claim to be - too big to fail and hence must be bailed out at all costs and regardless of the circumstances. It is no longer an issue of left versus right but is now deeply embedded and ingrained within legal bureaucracy essentially and effectively holding both parties at bay and in the palm of neoliberal hands.

At the same time, there is no longer much competition to speak of as large corporations have either bought and engulfed the smaller businesses or they have run them into the ground and out of business, or in some cases, they have done both. What is touted as freedom is now a subject of control, and where there seems to be a plethora of choice, it all comes back to a handful of companies that are essentially running the show and pocketing all the money and profits.

There is not much in terms of rule of law and much less in terms of fairness and justice as the prime objective of neoliberalism is the darkest side and corner of unbridled capitalism itself, to make maximum profit in the shortest amount of time with little consideration or respect for the environment or people’s lives.

Anything that would bring in a quick buck or two, namely, an increase in financial capital and monetary value would be all good. The easier, the better, and, in addition to the ubiquitous loopholes, specific rules and regulations have been set in place to protect the companies from prosecution, failure, and even bankruptcy. In other words, and as Mehrsa puts it herself, the game is rigged.

Matters of fairness and justice are being ignored ever since this economic ideology has infected politics, and now mega corporations are running our lives. Democracy is on the decline as money, to borrow from Bob Dylan, does not speak, it swears, and reaches and extends its spiky tentacles in practically all areas of life and existence. What was seen and presented as market freedom has delivered its opposite, not a state-controlled economy but a corporate-driven state turning everything into minable commodities.

Add to that corruption and cases of unchecked and even unlimited lobbying, and everyone’s hands become tied and sullied with mud. As Mehrsa explains, it is not necessarily single individuals that are responsible and to be blamed but it is a system, a big dumb machine that has been the culprit and like memes, it keeps incessantly and mindlessly reproducing itself with the aim of increasing profits up to unimaginable heights and draining the pockets and livelihood of honest and hard-working people everywhere within its reach and vicinity.

In fact, this is eroding and undermining the middle class and thus creating a larger divide between the super wealthy and the very poor. Not only do most people need to work harder to barely make ends meet but they are also bending under the burden of serious amounts of debt. Without regulation and skyrocketing debt, usury, a practice frowned upon by major religions across the world since time immemorial, is not only good but excellent for business. It is dumb money in action as capital reproduces itself at high speed with little effort and not much productivity to speak of.

And yet, to my surprise, it has not always been like this. Previously, with the help and aid of government rules and regulations, corporations were made aware of the duties they have to the public. Often with various government contracts pending and at stake, corporations aimed to address social problems while equally contributing to the overall wellbeing of society. This was another dimension of corporations because it was actually good for business.

Embracing their role of corporate social responsibility made economic sense and it was not driven out of the goodness of their heart but for more practical reasons. They were seeing and treating people as their prospective clients and treated them with a certain amount of respect or tact. Yet in the world of absolute power, the same people are just viewed as mindless consumers that can be and are exploited in various ways and via different, often shady and even nefarious means.

In fact, modern day corporations seem to take people and their influence and their many contributions for granted. It is because of the honest and hardworking taxpayers that corporations have the infrastructure to move their goods and services across the world as well as police and security in each of the towns and cities to ensure safety, safe transport, delivery, and consumption. It seems so unfair and frustrating that while citizens are pulling their part and paying their dues, corporations seek tax havens to escape paying their much needed and obligatory share to us, the people.

Yet it is not corporations alone that are causing issues and ripple effects across the economy to the detriment of ordinary citizens. Banking, which used to be restricted and constrained in its operations to ensure that it would give less cause or occasion to abuse and to provide additional layers of protection to the public became another corporate structure piece under the helm and guidance of neoliberal stewardship.

As a result, banks started taking reckless risks with other people’s money. And it did not stop there since it gave rise to “shadow banks” that, not unlike corporations, are driven by financial benefits and profits. Enter the derivatives, which are seen as “synthetic” as opposed to what are considered “real” assets. There is no productive value in this except the possibility of increasing one’s own financial assets at the expense of others.

Yet this erodes what has been the staple of the banking system and the currency itself, namely people's trust. It was the erosion of trust that was a significant catalyst for economic crises, be it the Great Depression or the Wall Street crash of 2008. Banks need and bank on people’s money for their own investments, which can incur considerable risks and losses, yet when there is distrust, bank runs become more likely and possible.

The problem is that banks cannot guarantee the availability of each patron’s money at the same time. If everyone takes out their money within a short time span, the bank will not be able to pay out the necessary and requested amounts and would essentially become bankrupt. This is what Roosevelt was concerned about when he talks about perceived fear being potentially more dangerous and threatening than actual and real threats and dangers.

This is additionally troublesome because money, with the absence of any guarantee after the elimination of the gold standard is essentially only paper, or in the digital world, flickering numbers on a screen. The economy runs on trust and so a lack thereof can trigger or be its downfall.

The distrust and frustration with mega corporations are already present, their influence and control upon politics is suspect, and with it, democracy is at stake. This can only forbode impending disaster, and it becomes more important than ever to change course and to ensure that faith and trust of the people are slowly and carefully upheld if not restored. Otherwise, it will not merely be the end of democracy but the rise of totalitarianism, and we already know from painful experience what it can do to the social and human fabric and existence.

The Iron Claw of Trauma and Toxic Masculinity and Going Beyond the Family Cult

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Wed, 29 May 2024 15:41:00 +0000

It is rather strange that someone who does not like wrestling or fighting should enjoy movies about them. Oddly enough, I am not referring to David Fincher's Fight Club, a classic for many, a masterpiece for others but which failed to impress me, and I thought that, at least in some ways, it contributed to instead of being critical of toxic masculinity. Yet, when it comes to family drama/trauma, two of the best movies out there are Gavin O’Connor’s Warrior and Sean Durkin’s The Iron Claw. Both films tackle fighting and competing in the ring, and both have endings that broke my heart and made me cry.

As usual, there will be spoilers galore and then some, so proceed with caution; it is best to have already watched the movies and trust me they are worth your time. While Warrior focuses on mixed martial arts, a sport that I find violent and abhorrent, The Iron Claw tackles wrestling, and yet interestingly, both are driven by dysfunctional families with flawed fathers at the helm. While in the former, the father is an alcoholic former boxer, played stunningly by Nick Nolte, who fails to hold the family together, in the latter, the father is an imposing figure that demands unconditional loyalty and unwavering obedience and respect from all its members.

While Warrior focuses more on the sibling rivalry between two rather different feuding brothers, the impetuous and rebellious Tommy (Tom Hardy) versus the family man Brendan (Joel Edgerton), in The Iron Claw, it is the unity and the cultlike adoration of the father that is its focal point. What moves us more is the fact that the latter is based on a true story and the various devastating and heartbreaking tragedies are not just a figment of the imagination but are grounded in real-life flesh-and-blood people and experiences. While Warrior moves us, The Iron Claw cuts deep.

Fritz Von Erich is the glue that not only holds the family together, but he is also the existential driving force of every individual within this circle. He projects his own dreams and failures onto his family. Essentially, he wants each of his sons to succeed where he personally failed, namely, to make themselves a name in the field of wrestling. The Iron Claw is his signature move and his legacy, but it is also symbolic of the tight grip he has on all his sons and his wife.

Not only are they to be blindly obedient to his wishes regardless of their own desires and passions, but they must be disciplined and hard-working throughout. There is no room for individuality or finding your own talents or even creating your own life; they are supposed to do as he says without doubts or hesitation. The ideology or reasoning is that the world out there is not a safe nor a fair place; yet there are two ways to protect oneself and to reach success: one, it is important to be physically and mentally strong to thwart opposition and challenges, and two, the family must remain united and support each other to the max.

The Von Erich family is a brand and a cult-like entity. Interestingly, one of filmmaker Sean Durkin’s previous movies Martha Marcy May Marlene dealt with the repercussions of identity and trauma after having been in an abusive religious cult. The gospel in this case are the sayings and proclamations of the father and the ring is the place where salvation can be attained. The tenet is masculinity in its rawest and most muscular form, men who fight and bully themselves to the top with an iron will and with no room for emotions or vulnerability. When in pain, be it physical or emotional, one must man up and suck it up as Kevin (a brilliant Zac Efron) is painfully reminded of throughout the film.

Not all the sons commit to this ideology because they believe in it but all of them accept and embrace it because they want to impress their father and yearn for his love and respect. In the case of Mike, the youngest of the clan, he would much rather be a musician, and yet, he is discouraged from doing so and is thrown into the ring against his will. Each of them suffers the consequences and breaks down from the physical and emotional tolls, and sadly, only one of them manages to eventually stand up against the abusive father and break away from this cycle of trauma.

To rationalize the amount of tremendous suffering they must go through as a family unit, they catch and hold on to the belief that the family is cursed. At first glance, it may look like it but when we look and dig deeper, we see that the curse is trauma itself, a trauma that is propagated by false and unhealthy beliefs and lifestyles. Everything becomes centered on wrestling with the coveted belt as the Holy Grail, the same way others may blindly and unquestionably worship religion, money, or political ideologies to reach their aims and purposes. Neither of them is bad per se, but when it becomes an obsession and a compulsion at the expense of life itself, then it poses a serious problem.

So much so that two of the Von Erich brothers (three in real life!) commit suicide. They are unable to continue living under the tyranny of such an utterly restrictive, bleak, joyless, and pointless world. Slowly, the family unit becomes more and more disentangled and fragmented, and only Kevin is left at the end. He who had dedicated all his life to the support and wellbeing of his brothers whom he loved dearly and whole-heartedly was on his own now with all his brothers having passed away.

Yet, fortunately, he manages to break away from this vicious cycle and from the grip and power of his father. Anyone who has not experienced abusive relationships or a dysfunctional family of that ilk may criticize its members for staying and holding on against rhyme and reason. But it is much easier said than done.

Your family is the starting point of life. Views and values are shaped by its members, and they become embedded and embodied by each person. As you take them at face value and for the God-given truth, it is very hard, but not impossible, to shake it off and look beyond it. Cults tap into that mindset and often claim to be your ersatz family to better control your mind and behavior while they restrict the contact with others who are not likeminded. This is because often a close third-party outsider could serve as a sounding board and can encourage one to move away from the abusive and toxic environment.

In this case, a lot of credit must go to Kevin’s wife Pam (Lily James) as presented in the movie. She is the very opposite of toxic masculinity and unlike Kevin’s subdued and submissive mother Doris (Maura Tierney), she does not go along with it, nor accept or tolerate it. She is a strong, determined, and independent woman who knows from the get-go what she wants. This becomes apparent in the first meeting of the two. Like other fans, she asks Kevin for his autograph, but then, she basically makes him ask her out. Kevin is shy and has had little contact or experience with women (he is a virgin), but none of this poses a problem here as she makes up for all that and rectifies the situation.

But it is not just this determined quality that makes her stand out; it is also and further bolstered by her empathy. She understands and supports him. On their first date, after he talks about the pain of losing his elder brother (yes another one!) at a young age, she hugs him and gives him what his mother is unable or unwilling to provide him with, emotional support.

At the same time, he supports her and her ideas and lifestyle. She bluntly tells him on that first date that she wants to have children but that she also wants to work as a vet, and if he would be all right with all that. He does not hesitate and accepts. We can see that the toxic masculinity is not ingrained in him; it is just used as a means or a tool to please and wring and wrestle love and respect from his father.

When Kevin finally goes against the will of his father by not only giving up on wrestling but also selling the company, he ends up becoming a stay-home Dad. He seems much happier in this role and embodies this lifestyle and in a sense also transmits it to his two boys. The trauma bolstered and fueled by toxic masculinity has come to an end. He can tune into and be himself with a healthy sense of being male albeit with muscles and a bad haircut.

And then, there is the unforgettable and heartbreaking ending as he is watching his kids. They are engaged in playing sports, and he suddenly begins to cry. His sons immediately come to his side. For the first time, Kevin processes his grief and immense pain and tremendous loss. He says that he used to be a brother and that was his raison d’être before having his own family. In an impulsive act and show of beautiful empathy, his sons tell him that they could be his brothers if he wants.

And that makes him (and us!) cry even more. When Kevin apologizes for crying, as it is not a masculine thing to do, the kids, i.e. the new generation, tell him that it is in fact quite a natural thing to express one’s emotions and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. And they are right, and with them all, we can cry freely regardless of age and gender, and be free to be ourselves while loosening the iron grip and bolts of toxic masculinity and letting it rest in peace.

The Dark Side and Misguided Passion of Bizet’s Carmen

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 12 May 2024 00:52:00 +0000

Prelude

I have now been to various opera productions by the Vancouver Opera and have enjoyed them all, some more than less, but they have been excellent experiences, nonetheless and regardless. It turned out, not by design but by fortuitous circumstances or maybe even impulsivity, that this year and season, I ended up attending each and every one of them.

The one that was highest on my list was The Magic Flute, which I absolutely loved and actually saw for the second time, the previous one had been put on by the UBC ensemble various years ago. To Don Pasquale I went by accident and did not regret it all. Both, I went to by myself, reason forthcoming below.

And then, there was Carmen. This opera was never high up on my list, which is a bit ironic for someone who has studied 19^th century French literature and who loves and relishes in unbridled passion and romance and the bright and dark side of desire. The music has wonderful bits of course, but overall, it did not manage to sweep me off my feet. And yet, as my wife had her eyes set on it and reproached me (among a host of many other things) to have missed a previous production some years ago, I felt compelled and obliged.

Overture

Like concerts, these types of events one is fond of and tends to look forward to. One ensures that nothing encroaches upon the date and expects and hopes that it will be a resounding success. And as I am wont to do, I meticulously plan things in advance, leave little to chance and (try to) ensure that nothing goes wrong. Well, many things can still go wrong.

For starters, I have the tendency to arrive much too early to events. Usually, I attend the pre-talk but, on that day, I did not feel like it, and yet, I had allotted a good solid hour to get to the Queen Elizabeth Theatre, which is about a twenty-minute bus ride and a thirty-minute walk. The weather forecast included some rain after a few sunny days, but I assumed we should be fine.

The annual BMO marathon scheduled for the same day was in the back of my mind, but previous events of that caliber had not interfered in significant measure and led to only minor delays. We had a lot of extra time factored in just in case.

Yet when we stepped out, we noticed that this time it was different. There was an insane amount of traffic on our street and a noticeable lack of buses in the direction that we were planning to head. I suggested to grab umbrellas and walk, but it was immediately and forcefully vetoed. My wife chose to call a cab. I doubted that would be fruitful and merely pointed at it but was attacked on the spot. Like often, I shrugged and went along.

The cab ride was a disaster. It turned out that others were attempting to take the side roads as well and we were often caught in traffic that moved at a snail’s pace. Time was dangerously approaching showtime and bottled stress and frustrations culminated during this slow-motion ride through hell. The accusations flew from both sides, and although the cab driver did not speak Spanish (I presume), he could feel the tension between this quarreling couple.

And that was the exact reason I had gone to the opera by myself. The day I told her that I would go to Mozart on my own, there was an argument as well. I just did not want her to cast shadows on my enjoyment of that masterpiece; I was aware that it could and would happen with Bizet but was not as fazed by it. And this is not limited to the opera, watching Barbie with her was an ordeal as well, yes, Barbie for goodness’ sake!

All stress and worry for nought, we arrived there on time, but she gave me, as is wont to happen in such situations, the silent treatment. She would not even give me mono-syllabic responses. I could not wait for the music to start but felt sad and let down that I would not have anyone to talk to about and on the event. Lo and behold, two charming women sat by my side, and they were very pleasant and easy to talk to.

I do not know their names (I kind of wished I had asked them, but I wanted them to remain anonymous here; notwithstanding, I did tell or rather warned them that they would be mentioned in my post) and will refer to the first one as the German lady and the other one by my side as the first-time opera attendee.

We talked about how opera was such a unique and immersive performance that involved a high level of expertise in multitasking. Not only were the people on stage asked to sing, often challenging arias and had to do so quite often in different languages, but they were also supposed to act, move about, and in some cases even fight with each other and do minor stunts. In fact, they even had a knife fight in this opera.

The German lady told me how she was interested in learning Italian to be able to understand opera from the region and she also mentioned an Italian singer by the name of Giovanni Z. (for the life of me I cannot recall his full last name) who would turn and transpose German folk songs into Italian, which sounded interesting, daring, and challenging.

Meanwhile, our cherished first-time attendee was looking forward to this event and I was hoping, almost praying that it would turn out to be a thoroughly positive and enchanting experience for her (sadly, it was not) so here is to hoping that she will still continue to visit operatic events even after this letdown of Carmenic proportions.

Love for the Exotic, Uncommon, and Unattainable

In the opera, Don José is presented with two options. He could choose filial duty, his mother an invisible yet imposing presence via her letters brought by the charming messenger Micaëla, a village maiden who his mother suggests as a potential mate and spouse, and on the other side, the passion and desire for the attention-seeking and -grabbing Carmen who bursts on the stage and turns the head of all the soldiers present.

While the reasonable choice would have been the good and faithful girl sent by his mother, he chooses to go for the person that attracts him much more and on the spot. But duty and doing the right thing is one thing, following one’s desires and passion is another. He is smitten with the fiery Carmen, her appeal apart from her unparalleled beauty and uninhibited demeanor also comes from being a foreigner, having Spanish and Gypsy blood in her.

When she gives him the eye and the rose and basically encourages him to pursue here, there is no way back for this young soldier. He is even willing to go to prison for her (twice actually but the second time is for a completely different and much more sinister reason) and he consciously commits a misdeed for her by letting her escape from the shackles of the law.

This sacrifice of his does not go unnoticed by her so when he is released months later, she awaits him. She professes her love to him, which should be taken with a grain of salt as she has a long list and history of pervious lovers, but he takes it in completely, and again, against all odds and reason.

Yet when she discovers that he was planning to return to his post, she feels slighted. She wants all his attention and asks him to go even further and sacrifice his duty and livelihood for her. They would roam the mountains on horseback together living a fulfilling life of crime if only he deserted his post. For someone with narcissistic tendencies, it is always a matter of all or nothing and even all is just not enough or good enough for them.

When put on the spot, Don José hesitates for a moment, and she gets annoyed and angry. She even questions his love for her because if he really loved her, he would do absolutely anything to be with her. Ironically, he does show her at the end what is willing to do in the name of what he perceives and designates as love.

At this point, the impulsive young soldier gives in to the domineering Carmen and decides to go along with her fantasy; he is under the impression that he is in love with her, and worse, he believes that she loves him back. We already know and feel that it is not going to work out as there is another boy in town, the flashy and overly confident toreador Escamillo.

Leading a life of freedom and adventure is a recurring theme of this opera. In her view, she represents both; she gives no man her heart at least not for a long period of time, and she is free to reject anyone as she feels fit. Love is a free-roaming bird that is unbound and can go and land wherever it pleases, she sings with gusto.

As such, Don José is certainly not a good match. He is a go-between because the toreador just seems so much better suited to her temperament and lifestyle. Escamillo is a free spirit and a rebel who does not believe in rules and boundaries. In comparison, Don José is bland and boring and utterly naive. In this production, there is really nothing special about the young soldier, neither his looks nor his costume design, he is wearing jeans, and as one my opera companions stated, he looked like a “country bumpkin.”

Add to that the lack of chemistry between the two leads in this opera, perhaps due to the last-minute switch as the person destined to do Carmen had to cancel, and it seems implausible and even improbable that she should choose him.

The problem is also that we as the audience do not buy it, and even worse, cannot feel it. The actors sang very well and were proficient and professional throughout, but the main relationship never came to life and did not convince us and when they fail to resonate with us, the opera suffers as a result.

Neither me nor the charming ladies beside me felt the passion and love that was portrayed here, and it took away from our enjoyment and identification with the two characters. Yet, when she chooses Escamillo, it makes perfect sense, but he is just a foil and counterpoint to the rather insipid Don José, and we know too little to care about the toreador, merely that he appears to be the male version of Carmencita. But his entry on a motorcycle was quite impressive and it was easy to see and understand why everyone was a fan and was cheering for him, and if anyone was worthy of Carmen’s infatuation, it would have to be him.

Finally, since we find it hard to feel for and understand Don José, the ending makes little sense to us and does not have the emotional impact it should have had. She does seem to entice him and to egg him on by repeating that she would rather die than to be with him, but the fact that he commits this horrendous deed what is commonly referred to as a "crime of passion" seems rather far-fetched in this production.

As neither character is particularly likable, none of us shed a tear for them, which is unfortunate because good and classic opera is supposed to be a focal point and magnifying glass for the feelings and passions of life. Here, we did not care for either and were not particularly moved by their actions. One of them ends up dead, the other in prison, and neither is or was free nor was there much to speak of in terms of passion, adventure, and let alone, love.

The Serendipity Plus Synchronicity Equation and the Dilemma and Challenges of Finding True Love

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sat, 04 May 2024 23:35:00 +0000

Call it coincidence, happenstance, or fate, but often, there seems to certain elements missing from the equation of love. This goes beyond emotions and connections and even further past attraction and infatuation. When it comes to love, there are different shades and colors that come into play as there are so many different kinds and types of love, but here, I will be focusing on romantic love and meeting the person one is meant or destined to be with.

Before we take a closer look at the special someone, let us talk about love itself. I see love as something that cannot be willed or brought into existence. It is more akin to the allegorical representation of Cupid hitting us with an arrow. Often, it is unexpected and can happen in an instant. We may run into someone and suddenly feel a warm feeling around the heart.

It can also appear unexpectedly. We may be suddenly feeling differently about a friend or a co-worker. This may be initiated through a specific word, gesture, action, or moment, merely a shift in feelings and perception, or an epiphany. In other words, how we see and feel about a person can suddenly and unexpectedly shift. It is like having the rug taken from under your feet and you are left floating in the air. Love almost always has a weightless air about it, and as Kundera might attest, the lightness can be unbearable if it lacks a calibrating counterpoint or influence. Love can also suddenly fly out of the window and leave us emotionally stranded.

Some people believe that there is a soul mate out there, the “perfect partner”, the designated person who wholly understands us and fully complements us. Others say that such a concept, entity, or person is merely a figment of the imagination and wishful thinking. That does not however preclude that any relationship must go through difficulties and challenges and only with the right amount and level of care, communication, and commitment, one can turn it into gold and attain lasting joy and happiness.

Yet not just anyone can do the trick for us. The problem, if you want to call it as such, is that each of us is unique, not only in personality but also in our past experiences, and we are often strongly influenced by unconscious negative thoughts, feelings, moments, and narrative patterns in addition to the constant rewiring and readjustment that our mind and heart go through due to living in and traveling through time and space. Put differently, we are not only different to begin with, but our experiences constantly mold and shape us in unique and idiosyncratic ways.

Notwithstanding, there is an underlying and utterly complex network of connections and requirements necessary to meet someone special, let alone the one. First off, there is the matter of timing. To physically meet someone, we need to occupy the same time and space. This could be a café, a bar, a workplace, church, or a party, but we need to be there at the same time.

Secondly, we need to notice each other. How many times have we walked past someone who has looked at us with sparkling romantic or longing eyes, and we just did not register it and walked on. There is a level of awareness and mindfulness necessary that goes beyond merely occupying the same space.

Let us say that our eyes do meet. If it is a stranger in a public place, the next step can be very difficult, again relative to personality characteristics and personal experiences. One or both may be too shy or timid to initiate the interaction. How many thousands and millions of people pass each other with a half-smile but do not utter a single word. How many matches and connections could have been potentially made if one of them had the guts to utter a simple hello to the other. Ironically and sadly, we find it much easier to express our anger and dissatisfaction than our interest and curiosity.

But we are going to assume that all these hurdles are met and overcome. We meet the other person, we perceive and notice the immediate chemistry, we strike up a lively conversation, and a connection is made and established. What is the next step?

It depends. This is where another facet of synchronicity is at play. We have had the fortune to meet the person we are meant to meet and both of us noticed and realized this. It is for a lack of a better word, love at first sight. We are going to assume that there are no other complications, they are not tourists, do not have visa issues, do not live too far away, etc.

Yet what exactly is each person’s relationship status? To claim that two people who are soul mates would meet in the prime of their lives while both happen to be single and do not have any other major concerns and impediments in terms of entering a life-long relationship seems like a bit of a stretch. At the least, one of them may be in a relationship, serious or not.

This is an added complication, especially if one has been in a longer intimate relationship or if one or both is married and even has a family. Serendipity may in fact bring us together at any point of our lives and what if we had an established path and were now asked to make a serious detour. Should we drop and abandon everything to engage in this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity or should we just ignore it and let it fly? Should we fight and repress it?

The cynic and the realist would not engage in such a risky if not reckless undertaking. We may feel the spark and chemistry, but we do not know the other person. To take a leap in such a way and manner can be akin to suicide, the potential ending of everything that went before. Do you put all your money on a single card? Are you fully aware of the chances and probabilities at play and what a loss would and could mean to you and others around you?

And yet, like anything worthwhile and fulfilling in life, one must make a decision and even sacrifice or give up a thing or two in the process. It is never easy and that could be a sign that it is a potentially meaningful choice. So far, we have considered synchronicity, various coincidences and happenstances putting us on the same path of life regardless of our current circumstances, relationship status, and other types of considerations.

The good news is that if you believe in fate or destiny, it tends to be, thankfully, stubborn and insistent. It does not just let go or drop the endeavor but will give you various signs and signals like Gatsby’s flashing green light on the bay or other more hidden and subtle clues. Dreams may also play a role and guide you in a certain direction. It is, however, each individual’s responsibility to see and recognize this and then to decide what to do about it. Fate cannot, and of course will not, force you to be with the ideal mate; love though a forceful feeling is much too precious for that and can be ignored, downplayed, and repressed at one’s own cost and peril.

Love is also rare. Although some claim to fall in love every other day, that may be doubtful because love is not a common or ordinary thing or feeling. If you are asked to think about a person that you have truly loved, that is with emotion, passion, and abandon, there tends to be only a few or perhaps just one person that comes to mind.

If it is the person, you are currently with, then count yourself lucky, but the relationships we have are not always based on true love. There are other factors that are being considered, which factor in this choice and equation. Some of them may be unconscious like the quest for a father or mother figure or replacement. Others are more practical as certain types of evident benefits, such as finances, status, looks, or connections.

Even if you have married your high school sweetheart, you may have doubts now, whether they are justified or not. Or you may meet someone else who makes your heart skip a beat, and you are certain it is not merely attraction but goes much deeper than that.

Many hearts are broken on the path of life. Some of the people may not have been a good fit for us; we may feel a lack of love, interest, difference in priorities, or even a clash of personalities that can become more pronounced over time. And some people change. It could be us or the partner, or both. If the path we are talking about is significantly different, one or both would suffer in the process.

As can be seen, love is fickle, precious, and has a mind of its own. It can come out of nowhere and drop and enter into our lives unexcepted, perhaps even wreak a little or a lot of havoc, or it might never cross paths with us. At the same time, we might be too occupied and preoccupied to see and feel it. We may be set on a routine that gives us comfort and safety and are not willing to budge even a bit despite not feeling fully alive throughout.

In that sense, love is a bit like vocation. You may be engaged in work that is pleasant, brings in sufficient amount of money and that you are good at, but it just does not fulfill you in a profound sense. It is not the dream job you had imagined in your childhood and so something will feel amiss, and you may not find lasting joy and fulfilment. Love is not that different in the sense that you know when it is there but unlike vocation it cannot be conjured or realized with work and effort only. There is a magical and even mystical aspect to it that can be often out of reach. While we have a certain say and can influence certain actions, some things will remain out of reach no matter how hard we try.

But when you are fortunate enough to have serendipity knock at your door, listen up. Consider answering, if only out of curiosity at first or because it is the polite thing to do. Unlike coincidence, serendipity tends to be fortunate, and it often includes elements of synchronicity. It is not commonplace and may not occur again. It is the universe communicating with you and trying to get through to you. It has the best intentions in mind. But in the end, you are the one who has to respond and take action, and it is your call after all.

The Mirhady Lecture 2024: The Existence, Purpose, and Metaphor of Prisons in Iran and Around the World

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Tue, 09 Apr 2024 16:13:00 +0000

After a four-year hiatus, which was not out of choice, the Mirhady Lecture with its focus on Iranian studies was finally back on the map again last week. The previous one was on March 1, 2020, which was a handful of days before Covid 19 officially became a pandemic and when subsequent safety measures and restrictions came into effect worldwide. It is interesting to note that this year’s chosen theme and focus was on prisons as we have had globally - due to the pandemic -first-hand experience of being locked in and isolated from each other for a substantial amount of time.

It is also a moment to reflect upon the history and practices of incarceration, which despite the narrow focus on modern Iran in this lecture has much wider, global, historical, social, and political repercussions, which were partly addressed and which I shall add to and expand upon at the end of this post.

The invited speaker was Dr. Golnar Nikpour talking about her recently published (first) book The Incarcerated Modern Prisons and Public Life in Iran published by Stanford University Press. As a historian, she defined “modern” in this context as starting from the 18^th century to the present, which were partitioned into three separate breaking points: the Qajar period, the Pahlavi reign from 1925 to 1979, and then, the subsequent Islamic State after the ‘79 revolution right up to the current day.

Interestingly, forced confinement was rare during most of the Qajar period. There were cases and occasions of corporal punishment on display, such as the public whipping of the soles of the feet but there was no systematic punishment via incarceration. In fact, there were no prisons to speak of at the time; they existed only in a makeshift form and fashion to keep and house criminals for a certain amount of time.

Nonetheless, this was about to change starting from 1910 due to growing lawlessness in the region. There was a decisive shift with a more systematic approach as uniforms were introduced in the 1910s and 20s and the concept and institution of the modern prison system started to catch on and take hold.

This was what Golnar called the “public life of the prison” during which Iranians had to learn how to adjust and navigate around not getting arrested alongside ideas of good citizenship as opposed to more clear-cut criminal acts and behaviors of previous times. A new awareness of one’s own duties toward others and the nation began taking shape in the consciousness of its people with the introduction of the added punishment of being isolated and locked away from others and losing one’s liberty and freedom of movement due to transgressing and breaking the established codes, rules, and laws.

This was expanded upon by the Pahlavi period and different reasons and motivations were added to the fray. The immediate repercussion was that inmates increased from mere dozens to tens of thousands during that reign. Ironically, the post-revolutionary Islamic period, which had criticized the previous administration on its restrictive and inhumane prison system, rose and expanded to a quarter million, if not more, inmates.

The emergence of the modern prison system had various consequences on daily life. To begin with, despite the appearance and promises, justice was not necessarily enforced in a uniform and fair and balanced way. As there was not enough independent democratic oversight, it led to corruption and abuses, and not just an increase in corporal punishment but also the implementation of torture and forced confessions.

This changed the whole dynamic regarding power, citizenship, and incarceration. It also had effects on the psyche of its people around notions of freedom and unfreedom, the finer details and print between lawfulness and lawlessness as well as the distinction between what constituted good citizenship versus a more simplistic view of being a bad criminal.

That said, the purported intentions were not merely to punish but rather to reform and even train the ones who had allegedly swayed from the “good path.” Prisons were previously seen and referred to as places of council, but during the Pahlavi period, it had a more therapeutic outlook, namely, to cure if not purify people from their criminal tendencies and to turn them into good or model citizens. Imprisonment was not presented as a punitive measure, but the inmate was treated as a patient and the prison was thought to provide the necessary albeit mandatory and enforced cure.

Yet, politics was always going to play a role and so there were political prisoners as opposed to ordinary or more common ones, i.e. those who had engaged in infractions ranging from minor to more serious crimes. Yet, political prisoners would always be a sticky point especially in less democratically inclined nations, where these inmates would be presented, represented, and framed as a national security threat or a danger to the public.

The lines would not be as clearly defined. Incidentally, many political dissenters ended up not only meeting each other in these confined spaces but they also created networks and learned from each other. In fact, Bozorg Alavi, a communist sympathizer, explained how “in prison, one read in earnest” and due to less distractions of daily life, preoccupations, or entertainment, their focus was more on learning and by extension to further their respective causes.

Alavi touted his educational achievements because it was thanks to prisons that he had learned Russian and English, which were most useful and helpful for his political aims and aspirations. Moreover, it was not uncommon to write and even publish clandestinely in prison and to even create political parties in confined and concentrated places like those.

Ironically, (note that history and politics tend to be filled with moments of irony), the prison system became the rallying cry for the revolution itself and many of them had had first-hand experience of being imprisoned. That did not, however, stop the new administration from creating an elaborate, even more restrictive, and punitive system themselves. Even so, the Islamic government may not have defined prisons as therapeutic, yet they considered them to be “virtue training schools,” where inmates were supposedly taught necessary life and vocational skills in addition to morality and Islamic values.

This is not too far off from the modern political system on a global scale. Even the term penitentiary involves a certain aspect of penitence, of having the criminal repent their sins and wrongdoing and upon release to be cured or reformed from doing evil. This is the blueprint or foundational structure of the prison system because it tends to see itself as a place of reform and rehabilitation. In some cases, therapy is an added element in addition to the establishment, support, and maintenance of law and order both within and outside of the prison walls.

It is something that both pre- and post-revolutionary periods have in common. The difference would lie in its focus; whereas the previous would be more secular, the other would be decidedly Islamic in nature and outlook. Nonetheless, the other aims of the modern prison system exist equally in various parts of the world, that is, to make society safer by incarcerating dangerous repeat offenders and keeping them off the streets for the benefit of the populace and society.

This becomes arbitrary when there is a lack of independent and institutional oversight with a less clearly defined and designated judiciary system. There is also both an overlap as well as a distinction between the role and purpose of prisons and mental asylums or psychiatric facilities. Yet, sick people, whether in the confines of a prison system or any other type of facility, ought to be treated humanely before there could be any talk of a potential cure.

Also, the prison system should not purposely aim to lock up troubled, troublesome, or troublemaking populations. Whether it is a social or political matter or a case of addiction and substance abuse, there need to be appropriate and distinct categories and measures applied to each case and situation.

In the current example of Iran, not only has the prison population exploded for a wide range of alleged misdemeanors and crimes but there is also more surveillance of its people. Ankle monitors are other forms of punishment and restrictions of movement that are being practiced; in fact, this includes people that are not officially counted as part of the prison system as they are not kept or housed within its compounds and premises.

There is, moreover, the use of biometric technology as well as traffic and police cameras to enforce rules established and enforced by the morality police for what are generally not considered offenses in other parts of the world. Technology has become part of a system that can in different ways lead to other types of control and punishment, which are not necessarily physical in nature.

The lecture by Golnar was quite insightful and thought-provoking as you can attest for yourself and as exemplified in the summary here. I found it most interesting that she kept referring to her book as a “book project” even though it has been already published. But I would like to take the opportunity to add some more thoughts to this topic of discussion and not just look at prisons as premises or means of enforcing and propagating ideas and ideology but also to see it as a metaphor for our current socially and politically volatile times.

Prisons are not just social in nature but they are also in our imagination. Although Golnar briefly referred to this, her point of view was more about being controlled by others, government and elite forces, which are often perceived, designated, and judged as evil, malignant, and nefarious entities with a hidden (or not so hidden) agenda.

Yet there is a blind spot here. By firmly believing and standing by her own point of view and interpretation of events and circumstances, she may be missing and overlooking important clues and opportunities. It is of course a tendency that people not only want to be right but to convince others that this is indeed so. It is not just her specifically I am referring to but also a wider culture around her that supports, encourages, and applauds her ideology, such as the institution of Simon Fraser itself.

Over the years, I have been to dozens of talks and lectures, and they claim and tout themselves in offering open dialogue as well as diversity. Yet with one notable albeit unintended yet utterly hilarious exception (I’d be glad to provide more details on this “colonial oversight” in the comment section should there be any interest), every single talk and lecture has been minor variations on a common theme and refrain. There is no element of surprise and no insight that does not perfectly if not artificially align with the established doctrine.

Those are taken as true undisputed and untouchable facts with no pause for reflection or allowance for any other points of views or observations that may even slightly diverge from this “absolute truth.” This is hardly a case of open dialogue because it lacks and even prohibits a priori any type of openness or discussions.

Although there can be moments of insight and the furthering of education and knowledge, this is all framed within such an obvious and narrow agenda in mind that it can become rather counterproductive. An educational system ought to teach us how to think, not what to think, and sadly, our minds are not only being taken hostage here, but they are imprisoned as well as force-fed, not unlike the systems they tend to point fingers at.

Finally, prisons are not just places where movements are restricted, but the exact opposite can be the case where the place itself is off limits, so you are not able to go or move there at the peril of your own freedom and life; in fact, being away from it is a form of prison and punishment as it causes tremendous pain and suffering.

In the context of Iran, this applies to those who have sought political asylum abroad and may not be able to return to their homeland at risk of being punished, imprisoned, or worse. My father was one of those people who deserted his homeland, sacrificing everything in the process, his home, his job and career and leaving his family and friends to save those who mattered most to him, us, his children.

Although we lived in different parts of the world, I do not think that he ever was at home or felt accepted. In Germany, this was certainly not the case, as we were unfortunately tagged and branded as Ausländer (foreigners) despite having lived there for more than a decade; even if you did not have an accent, it was your looks that signaled and gave away that you did not belong.

In my own case, not having a home has been its own joy and cross. On one hand, it means that I am home wherever I feel at home and wherever my heart may be at a given moment, yet it also means that I have no specific home to speak of, no place to rest my weary head or to be fully seen and accepted as who I am.

In ancient Greece, Socrates was first imprisoned but then he was given a choice, to either leave his home and live in exile or drink a cup of hemlock. He chose the bitter cup of poison because he could not imagine being away from his native home and country. He would rather die in a place where he was not free than be free in a place that was not his home.

Creating Space Within and Giving Yourself Room to Grow and Explore

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 31 Mar 2024 05:31:00 +0000

As children, it is often of paramount importance to us to have our very own room. Although for economic reasons, we often must accept shared accommodation with siblings, and in times of poverty or exorbitant and uncontrollable inflation, you may all find yourself in the same room, or if the situation is even dire, you may not have shelter to speak of, let alone your own space. Notwithstanding, it becomes clear that for each of us, it is important to have our own personal private and un-intruded space.

This is part and parcel of and even a visible and tangible sign of independence, yet at the same time, it also comes to represent the place where we can be truly and fully be ourselves. If we have liberal-minded and permissive parents, we may even have a say in how we wish to decorate it. Moreover, in the comfort of this space, we can engage in activities that we enjoy, that resonate with our inner core and that give us pleasure.

As life progresses, many of us lose that access or at least certain aspects to that sort of privacy. In our college days, we may have a roommate or types of shared accommodation where we can be ourselves and feel perfectly at home, but it may come with certain limitations. Later, when we are living with our partner, that space is lost physically, yet we may maintain it in our minds by spending time away from home, either with friends or on our own. It then becomes a figurative or invisible space where we can be completely who we are without any pretense or excuses.

Incidentally, I am currently writing this not from my home but from a café. The idea, or rather the reason I tell myself, is to be less distracted but that is not always the case and that is not the main reason I choose to do so. It is rather looking for a different kind of space where regular distractions are warded off against and where I can experience different facets of myself. Add to that, the unexpected where I could potentially run into someone or meet someone new, which, however, rarely happens not necessarily due to a lack of people but because of my own timidity.

Oddly enough, I find that ideas in this “other space” tend to flow more freely, which may not be too surprising as there are various others who appear to tap into the same vibes and frequencies or thought patterns. As a university student, I would indeed often “escape” my room, which was tiny, but it was purely my own living space as part of the residential college I was at, and I would go to nearby beaches, including a nudist one, to do many of my assigned readings. Reading outdoors is just more fun, whenever the weather cooperates of course, and the surroundings are not too distracting.

As you can probably tell by now, the room I am talking about here is as much mental as it is physical, if not more so. We all need a room of our own was a song by Billy Joel and it is also a previous blogpost of mine based on and inspired by a podcast I did with creativity coach Eric Maisel. His view was to redecorate and redesign our mind and mental space and give it the renovations, uplifts and upgrades that we wished to have.

The concept is very interesting, and I would like to add to it here. It is not so much the way the room looks, whether your curtains are grey, blue, or multi-colored but how big or small it is. Size does matter. We often take up a more unassuming space not only in reality but also within our mind and spirit. In the real world, it is often due to financial pressures or limitations, and it is no secret that the increased square miles come at a rather significant cost.

Nonetheless, we take on the same mentality and apply it to our psychological space. It may be due to modesty, humility, lack of confidence, or fear of being seen as pretentious, arrogant and ungrateful, or simply because we think we do not deserve the extra space and have to accept and deal and content with what we got and what we get in life as the Rolling Stones remind us that we can’t always get what we want in life.

But those are limitations that we are setting ourselves and sometimes even imposing upon each of us. I agree with setting boundaries to protect ourselves, whether it is physical or in terms of effort, time, and energy invested but I disagree with these types of artificial barriers that we may unconsciously fence ourselves in and with. It is not only about what our room looks, like Eric Maisel explains in his book and on my podcast quite eloquently and creatively, but also how much space we give and allow ourselves. And in our imagination, should the sky not be our upper and topper most limit?

I am saying this at a moment in my life where I find that I have been selling myself short. It comes with the fact that I feel I have come up short and that I have been generally underappreciated, which at the time I assumed was only my imagination until I realized that it was not. It had its roots and anchors in facts and reality. Yet, in all fairness, I have not been doing myself any favors with my own false sense of modesty. This is the type of modesty that lacks true understanding of the facts and actual situation and circumstances. It is false because consciously or unconsciously, it denies and even diminishes if not denigrates our own skills, talents, and abilities.

Put differently, I need to expand my (mental) room because it does not allow for my essence and talents to exist fully. I do not have to continue living in my shabby self-imposed apartment because it is not where I currently belong. Perhaps it is time to move out or move up or even move altogether to a new mental space.

Psychologically speaking, this small room has been difficult because I have been limited myself in many ways. This is what Dr. Carla Marie Manly would designate our jail cell, the place that may be our so-called comfort zone but where we are willingly staying and lodging because we have shut the door with locks and all and barely dare to look out the window.

On one hand, this limited space restricts movement. If your inner space does not have much “legroom”, you will find it hard to go to places. You are not free but often restrained and constrained. You are also filled with negative expectations that seriously hamper your outlook and chances. Anything that is beyond the room you are occupying is not seen as an invitation or a welcome challenge but quickly brushed off as simply not for me.

In our cocoon, we live in an artificially set comfort zone, which is not comforting in the sense of its culinary cousin comfort food, which, although often not the healthiest option out there, fills us up with warmth, pleasant sensations, and pleasing memories. Here, we just remain entrenched in our “home” and filled with fear. The small black-and-white television gives us comfort although we are aware that there are more modern and much better options and variations out there.

Additionally, to grow, we need the room to do so first. Like a potted plant, that needs a bigger pot, so we need an area to expand more freely. That means, we need to tweak our views, perspectives, and expectations. We also need to take a good look at our fear and insecurities, which often turn out to be defense mechanisms based on previous situations that are simply outdated and no more valid. But we hold onto it like our tiny black-and-white TV set in front of us in our shabby apartment space.

We need not only a room of our own but room to grow. And to get there, we need room for error. It is a misnomer that we can get it right just right off the bat. No one can really do that because it is not realistic or feasible. You cannot expect to play Beethoven without taking piano lessons and without those hours and hours of endless practice and millions and millions of fumbles and mistakes along the way. I do not think that practice necessarily makes perfect, but it certainly helps us to tackle things much better. Yet, all this involves both effort as well as the willingness to make errors and be ready and willing to occasionally or often fail as we do so.

Give yourself room for errors and failure. They are not the end of the world but as vital and necessary for your growth as learning scales on the piano. It may not always be fun but if you have your eyes and heart set on a bigger living space, then you must accept this as a part of necessity. Incidentally, once you give yourself the much-needed extra space, you will also give others more room in your mind. They also need space, but it is hard for you to see that when you yourself can barely move.

Finally, you must be willing to accept change and to welcome it into your life. This is a hard thing to do because we get used to and entrenched to certain things and places. We get accustomed to our room as it is the place we know, and we have lived in for a long time.

Moreover, the job that we have may be far from perfect but it is the devil we know. It is better than nothing, we tell or try to convince ourselves. The person we are with we assume to be the best possible option because no one will love us more or better out there. It sure beats being alone and lonely, we tell ourselves. The country we live in, whether it is our home or the home of our choice is simply where we belong, for better or for worse.

Certainly, all or any of this may be true, no doubt. This cannot be judged here without additional details and some scrutiny as well as complete honesty and after serious, intense, and intimate introspection and reflection. Yet, there may be a change in the offing or at the very least some room for improvement in your living space, be it physical or mental, in your relationship or at your place of work.

But if we are blind to it, if we do not see it or choose not to perceive it, it does not mean it is not there. The best way is to expand our room, to not only look out of the window but step out, and then take a second look and find out for ourselves. We may be surprised that we have been living in an unnecessarily confined place but no more starting from now on.

Ode to Supporting Actors And Actresses That Do Not Win

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 17 Mar 2024 00:34:00 +0000

The film industry’s award season tends to come to an annual end with the culmination of the popular, prestigious, and much-coveted Academy Awards. Although each award and film festival are precious and valuable on their own, combined they give weight and momentum to several selected individuals who then become the frontrunners at the Oscars.

There is a building and budding narrative that gradually takes shape and form over this period, and we often see certain trends emerge where a handful of specific movies, actors, actresses, filmmakers, etc. are favored throughout. For better or worse, all of this then culminates in the Oscars, the playoffs of all things movies and filmmaking.

Yet, more often than not (the occasional upset, snub, or surprise notwithstanding), we have an inkling or two of who or what movies are most likely going to win in their respective categories. It is not always set in stone, but the element of surprise may have less of an impact once we get to the award ceremony. That said, things become more interesting when there is a close competition or run-off, usually between two opponents that are just too close to call.

Although it may be a more muddled affair regarding Best Pictures (we even had a mix-up in which everyone had easily accepted La La Land as the year’s recipient when it in fact it had not won), it usually becomes more or less clear who the frontrunners especially when it comes to the acting category. This year, the leading actor with a realistic and probable shot was pretty clearly outlined, that is Oppenheimer’s proud Irish boy Cillian of course although Paul Giamatti had a good run and made a strong push by gaining some admirable momentum towards the end.

The Actress in a Leading Role category was an altogether different matter, however. It was a close and virtual tie between two powerful performances (sadly at the time of writing, I have not seen either movie so I cannot weigh in or make any credible or valid judgments on the matter) and up to the very end, it could have gone either way. At any rate, both deserved to win but only one had to be chosen.

Yet what about the other nominated actresses? Essentially, there was no chance for them to win. They started off the award season with high hopes and the potential to win, but they would have to be content with just being nominated. I mean, of course, it is an honor and accomplishment to be there (so many in the acting profession would envy them) but think of it how it must feel to put on your best outfits knowing fully well that you had absolutely no chance of winning.

This is not a matter of performance. The performance has already been done and it is finished now and all they can do is watch and hope for a miracle. Miracles do happen but this is one of the cases where there is very little one can personally do to make it happen or to bring it about. Unlike athletic events, you could have an exceptionally great day and pull off an upset, or the favorites may just have a bad and unlucky day, yet in this case, your fate is in the hands or fingers of voting members.

Many of these nominated actors and actresses know that they have almost no chance of winning and so they go to network and socialize and have fun. A funny incident in the television award season was Pedro Pascal who had given up hope and decided to get drunk only being shocked that he actually won! Yet, for the most part and for most actors and actresses, having a good time is what it is all about.

Yet, I am curious about what it feels like to go to each of the award seasons and not to win a trophy each and every time. Is that not discouraging or having a negative effect on one’s mental health? To say to yourself, here we go again, and we will yet again not win another award? Would one at times not prefer to be watching afar instead of facing cameras and subsequent social media scrutinizing each nonverbal gesture and response to the often expected announcement?

Although generally those in the acting profession tend to show up and they should be good at bottling or hiding emotions like anger, disappointment, frustration, all courtesy of their career, there have been occasional glaring absences, which may be due to involvement in other projects or simply because they do not wish to be there and go through the motions. Yet, here we go again, I am making pronouncements on things I will never experience myself and hence know next to nothing about. And yet, it is curiosity that makes me think and wonder about such things.

I do not have a solution or suggestion here. Except to ensure that those who are not on the winning side ensure that they do not carry negative feelings but instead focus on the positive aspects and experiences. To boycott those events when you know you cannot win would send decisively negative vibes to the entire award season and the film industry itself so showing up on the red carpet smiling and going through the motions despite knowing that there is little to no chance of winning still seems to be the best option out there.

But this is my ode here to support all the actors that do not win and including those who never get nominated. Some of the greatest actors and filmmakers have not won awards and it does not make them any less great. Quite to the contrary. They are who they are, and they (hopefully) know this deep inside.

Then, there are those who should not have quit their day jobs, but they did anyway. They may not be particularly good at acting or filmmaking for that matter, but they have a passion and a dream, and I would be the last person to step on those wishes and desires. You do what you do and if you are fortunate, you will be doing what you love. If awards and recognition come to you, it feels great but that should not be the end goal. The end goal is to do what gives you joy and if it happens to bring joy to others as well, it is definitely a win-win situation.

Maybe we can learn from Ryan Gosling who in my view had the best performance of them all. But like his character Ken, he is a ten, but he does not get what or who he wants. At times, life is such. No matter how hard we try or how much we desire something or someone, we are left wanting.

It is like waiting for a call or calling that just won’t come or materialize. And yet, the best (and really only) thing one can do for sure is to give an awesome, inspired, fun, and memorable show (Gosling’s showstopping performance anyone?) and not take any of this too seriously. I mean, after all, it is just an awards program and there are other things to life than winning or not winning an award.

Upcoming KPU Talk on Arts and Humanities, Creativity, and Mental Health

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Wed, 06 Mar 2024 21:37:00 +0000

Dear Blog Reader,

First off, I would like to express my gratitude to you all for visiting my blog! It is very much appreciated! Moreover, I am thrilled and excited to invite you to a free virtual event taking place on March 13, from 12 – 1 PM (PST) on the topic of mental health. I shall be sharing my research interests, my lifelong love and passion for the arts and humanities in addition to personal life experiences.

My proposal is that the arts, in whatever way, shape, and form, have the potential to help us not only deal with stress and anxiety but also to give us comfort and solace during difficult times in our lives. Furthermore, they can motivate us on the quest to find and refine our own unique voice and carve our own path in life filled with empathy and purpose.

Although anything can have its share of disadvantages and downsides, if the arts and humanities are channeled and seasoned with care, hope, optimism, and critical thinking, they can lead us to unexpected shores of knowledge, insights, and epiphanies.

I will talk about my interest in literature, my passion for classical music, opera, alternative rock, and cinema (everything from Taxi Driver and The Matrix to The Dark Knight and Wings of Desire) as well as my deep fascination and appreciation for philosophy and psychology. I believe they can all liberate our hearts and minds from undue stress and negativity, unlock our hidden creative potential, unleash our beautiful splendent uniqueness, and bring inner and outer peace into the world.

I very much look forward to seeing you there and you will also have the opportunity to comment or ask me questions at the end of the session! 😉

You can register here: KPU Arts Speaker Series

Thank you very much and hope to see you soon!

The Algorithm of Relaxation and How Being Yourself Is Your Best Version and Option

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Thu, 29 Feb 2024 17:15:00 +0000

I have always been suspicious of the concept of attempting to be the best version of yourself, and for good reason. This idea tends to be sponsored and promoted by the Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy community that was pretending or believing that it was merely a matter of changing your mindset and then you could just act out what you think or assume would be the best possible scenario in your mind and by extension the best version of yourself.

Although I am not averse or opposed to this notion and idea when it comes to planning, setting goals, following dreams, and even setting boundaries, there can be no better version or substitute than being who you truly are deep inside; that is authentically giving your innermost essence a voice and acting from it, that is from the heart.

But how do you know who you are? It would start with first figuring out what resonates with you. This cannot be achieved except by tuning into yourself and looking inward, a curious mindful mix of introspection and reflection that would give you insights into the core of your essence. It involves an openness to thought, feeling, and action to discover and uncover who you truly are. Many times, you are not who you think you are or even who you wish you were, and yet, the real you needs to shine through like rays of the sun. That is in fact the only time you would not only find but also embody inner peace and calm.

How to get there? The answer is it is not easy and will take effort and hard work. Yet one thing is certain, you cannot be yourself and worry at the same time. To attain a connection with yourself, like your source of creativity, you need to be calm and collected. Anxiety would create ripples in the sea of your essence and not let you see and feel things clearly.

Put differently, to be yourself you must relax, and ipso facto, the first step is to deal with anxiety. Anxiety, stress, and worry tend to be negative and toxic emotions that make you tense, and they are by definition the opposite of relaxation. In many ways, they would lead to thoughts and behaviors that may be the exact opposite of who you are and how you are as well as how you would like to be.

For your anxiety to diminish, there are a few things to keep in mind. First, you would want to be aware of it and accept that it is anxiety. Although it may fluctuate in level and intensity, we all have it and those who claim they are not anxious tend to score higher on the spectrum as they fail to recognize that they are human and will need to have a certain level of anxiety to function and survive in the world.

Anxiety is like thinking and so we can paraphrase Hamlet by saying there is nothing either good or bad in the world, but our anxiety makes it so. If you look at the sensations we have when we are thrilled and excited and when we feel anxiety, there is essentially not much of a difference there except how we label and respond to the feeling.

Even in daily jargon, we say that we are anxious for something to take place meaning that we are looking forward to it. To illustrate this with another example, we can cry for various reasons. It may be out of sadness or an exuberance of joy. This means that the act of crying on its own does not mean or constitute that it is always due to sadness; too much laughter can fill our eyes with tears. Feelings are often not as clear-cut, but we need to process them. It is of course much easier to process feelings of happiness than those of sadness but process them we must.

To be able to process them, you need to face them. Avoiding or circumventing them will rob you of the opportunity to process them effectively and by extension to learn and grow from them. Yet at the same time, it is important to be gentle with yourself and not push yourself too hard or criticize yourself too harshly.

It is best to lean into what is giving you anxiety, a form of tiptoeing into water instead of throwing yourself into the deep end. With patience and practice, you will learn to swim and even surf the waves. A given situation will not arouse strong uncomfortable feelings anymore, and even if they do, you will be better able to handle and deal with them.

To help you along is also the necessary insight and awareness of the situation and context. Our fear has kept humanity alive since time immemorial as we dodged tigers and wolves to survive. This inbuilt alarm system with its fight, flight, and even freeze options is a necessary component for our survival. We want to appreciate it and not curse it.

Yet, due to previous trauma and experiences, toxic feelings, and negative thinking, we may lose focus and even see things out of focus. That is when context is essential for us to notice that it is not always an existential threat even though it may feel as such. With this awareness, that it may not pose a grave threat but may even be innocuous in the grand scheme of things, we can reappraise and reevaluate the situation and respond to it in an appropriate and much calmer manner.

This is where AR, the algorithm of relaxation can become rather useful. You then look at a given situation and decide whether it is a serious issue or not. There are generally two options; either it is serious, or it is not. At first glance and as your knee-jerk response, you may think it is not only serious but an absolute tragedy or disaster. Yet when you ask yourself, is it really that serious and important, you may see it from a different light and perspective.

In some cases, we may not have sufficient bits of information to make a judgment call. In those cases, we often opt for the worst-case scenario, but we ought to keep that in check as worrying is not going to help us to deal and tackle with the issue in an effective way and manner.

Let us illustrate this with a few examples. Say, your boss wants to talk to you. This is usually followed by an immediate feeling of dread. We assume the worst and are already imagining getting sacked. A lighter shade of this strain of catastrophic thinking would entail being criticized, scolded, or reprimanded for something we have done.

It would be best to ask ourselves, is there any real cause for concern? Did we do something wrong? If we made a mistake, was it that serious? Will there not be a remedy for it? We could apologize or promise to do better the next time around.

What if it is nothing of importance but just a simple and friendly chat? Perhaps they might ask you a simple question that may not be even related to you and your work. Or, even better, what if it is good news and you are going to receive some praise for your great performance. What if there is the possibility of a promotion? Instead of jumping to conclusions and expecting the worst, you are giving yourself the freedom and latitude to imagine possible and potential alternative reasons for this tête-a-tête with your superior or supervisor.

If it is indeed serious, then you can tackle it with a clear focus. If it is not, you shall not waste your time and energy worrying about it. In either case, you want to avoid assuming the worst, especially without any sort of proof and evidence that it may be so. If you, however, have acted unethically or inappropriately, then it would be best to face the situation and the consequences, the same way one would face one’s anxiety.

What if your loved one wants to have a talk with you? Let us not sugarcoat this, that is usually a sign of trouble. Then again, if it is, ask yourself, if perhaps something good can come out of it. It is perhaps a long-due conversation that needs to happen, and it may not be as devasting and shattering as we make it out to be. In fact, although we may not wish it or would try anything to avoid it, it may even clear the air and lead to an improved level of communication and rapport and much less tension between the two of you.

Again, if it is indeed the end of the relationship, you may not necessarily see it as the end of the world but see it as the turning of a new page no matter how painful it may feel at the moment. That dreaded talk with your boss or partner may end up being much less serious than you thought it to be, and by using the algorithm of relaxation, you may be able to see through it much easier and much faster and spare yourself the drama and unnecessary worry and preoccupation that usually comes with it.

So why not try AR in your daily life whether it is the cancellation of your favorite concert or the just or unjust loss of employment? For instance, I used to fret over mistakes. I would call it part of my perfectionism, but one day, I realized that being a perfectionist was often used as a euphemism for one’s insecurity. It may be a different matter when it comes to the arts but for me, it was ensuring that my exams did not contain any errors. I would triple-check everything and God forbid there was a mistake on the sheet, which had somehow escaped my probing eyes.

You can imagine the amount of stress and pressure I would feel and put on myself for something that was not that important after all. Deep down, who cared if there was indeed an error? This was not precision surgery or rocket science in which a minor detail could endanger people’s lives and, in some cases, even one’s own.

Errors are part of life and for those of us whose work is not a matter of life and death, they are really not a big deal. A mistake on the exam or a wrong answer to a student’s question? Or even failing an exam here and there at high school? On the scale of AR that is simply not that important to fret about, so it goes straight to the category of not to worry about it. Alternatively, throughout all these cases, you may just be taking yourself too seriously to begin with!

Now I am aware that AR could stand for augmented reality but in a way, it is not that different from it. You are turbocharging your reaction and seeing things more clearly and are not overreacting to situations by seeing the bigger picture and putting them into context.

The more you do this, the more relaxed you will be and much less on edge that something bad will happen to you. The side effect is that you may be a bit too relaxed at times and perhaps confuse or misplace minor things, miss the occasional deadline, forget a commitment or an appointment here and there, or you may even, God forbid, make an error at work or in your private life or both.

But on the grand scale of things and when looking at the bigger picture, none of them would be life-shattering or as important and as serious as we take them to be, especially after looking at them again with the magnifying lens of AR.

Conversely, you will feel more comfortable in your own skin, which is the most important outcome, so instead of worrying about being the best version of yourself, actually be yourself, which is essentially the only version that really counts and matters.

On How the Transcendentalists Searched in Nature What They Could Not Locate and Find in Themselves

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sat, 17 Feb 2024 23:31:00 +0000

One of the main features of American transcendentalism was its quest for and refuge in nature. Both Emerson and Thoreau purposely as well as spiritually and physically turned their respective backs on what was shaping up to become an urban lifestyle and instead decided to search for peace and quiet in and within nature. Mind you we are talking about the 19^th century before the advent of the noisy hustle and bustle of traffic and way before the clutter of the Internet, smartphones, and Artificial Intelligence. Their technology looked puny and rudimentary in comparison to today and to be honest, there was hardly much to speak of in that regard, as there was no television and not even radio.

And yet, these thought leaders felt the push and pull to move away from even relatively small crowds, partly because they could; they had the means and the choice and opportunity to do so. In the wild expansive nature of the North American continent, which was still largely unexplored and undeveloped, they still had pristine places to roam and delve into, unlike the much more restricted and relatively set geographical areas of Europe, for instance.

Let us also not forget that they had the means to live and survive in the wilderness. In fact, it is more often those who possess at least a moderate amount of income who would even dare and contemplate such a crazy idea, to begin with, namely, to seek a different and more minimal and austere lifestyle away from the comfort of one’s home. In the somewhat paraphrased words of the French singer-songwriter Soan, I’d like to sleep under the moon but only when it is my choice. Unlike many wanderers, nomads, and homeless people, both Emerson and Thoreau had a home to return to in case things went south, i.e. if they encountered dangers, ran out of food, or simply did not enjoy the experience anymore. People less fortunate would not have a backup plan to fall back on.

But such ideas do not come out of nowhere and are not created in a vacuum or on a sporadic whim. In fact, French thinker and philosopher Rousseau was quite influential in propagating this idea of a type of return to nature and the (supposedly and allegedly) simple rural life of peace and tranquility. In certain ways, they are also echoes of Jefferson’s dilemma regarding the American spirit, should the nation embrace a rural life and lifestyle or bend towards an industrialized urban life of workers and factories?

This was driven by a general dissatisfaction with the status quo of the rapidly growing and changing cities and it seemed like a viable option or a kind of refuge from the madness to venture far from the madding crowd and into the arms of Mother Nature.

On the other hand, this ideology was also expressed in the work of Spinoza and became a quasi-religion. Nature was regarded as a pantheistic phenomenon with an apparent return to more “primitive” and original beliefs of spirits living in trees and blades of grass. Although Spinoza stressed reason and rationality, he made it all part and parcel of nature, which was seen as a type of Mother goddess, the origin and pinnacle of creation, and the continuous ever-flowing source of nourishment and subsistence.

These views hearken back to a collective experience we all have and which psychoanalyst Otto Rank talks about in his books and writings ever since his quintessential and revolutionary publication of The Trauma of Birth a hundred years ago. It is the dreamlike and fantastical prenatal world and experience of the womb. In a certain sense, the turn to nature represents a return to the maternal womb, the place where one felt still, at ease, sustained, fed, nourished, and at peace. This longing has driven us from the world of crowds to the stillness that nature embodies or at least that we imagine and presume it (or she) does.

That said, it is not only an idealistic view of nature but a very romantic one and perhaps even dangerously so. The romantics who stressed feeling and all things emotional over the rational and logical embraced the natural world but failed to see it in its entirety, which included not only beauty and grace but also the power to destroy alongside other destructive forces.

This idealization of the natural world is a dangerous human fallacy that ended up costing various lives and it can be illustrated by two real-life stories depicted in two forms of art, a movie as well as a documentary. First off, we have the insightful and moving documentary Grizzly Man by Werner Herzog where self-proclaimed American environmentalist Timothy Treadwell dissatisfied with his own life and struggling with mental health issues decides to go to the Alaskan wilderness to live with bears.

He preferred their company over their human counterparts and was perhaps inspired by his affection for his cute and cuddly teddy bears in his childhood. In other words, he denied these furry animals their wild and beastly qualities and saw and idealized them as peaceful and loving beings and not as bears that would be driven more by instinct and less by reason.

That said, some humans may seem wilder and more unpredictable than animals but that is a different story, which leads us to the sad story of another nature-enthused individual who is cinematically depicted in Sean Penn’s Into the Wild.

This idealistic but depressed young individual Chris McCandless who also went by the pseudonym “Alexander Supertramp” decides to take a deep dive and plunge into the wilderness by (apparently) rejecting the materialism and consumerism of his time and era. At the same time, despite being good at school and having the opportunity (and means) to study at a prestigious university, he throws all potential and caution into the wind, burns cash, drives to live in nature, and eventually dies there due to accidental food poisoning.

Again, this seeking of nature is less a going-to-somewhere but rather a running-from-something. The same may be said of all the individuals mentioned here whether it is Thoreau (whose philosophy of civil disobedience ended up influencing Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr.) or Emerson (whom Nietzsche considered “the most gifted of the Americans”) as they had their own motives to move away from traditional society, religion, and thinking.

At the same time, the transcendentalists served as the inspiration and role model to young idealistic but tormented individuals like Chris McCandless to embark upon a recklessly dangerous trip while using their books as a guide, source of inspiration, and motivation throughout the journey. They build upon Rousseau’s apparent dialectic between what is human-made and what is natural and organic and that the latter is what one should and needs to always ideally strive for.

In such dualism, we may overlook various segments of life where both can interact for the benefit of us all. This is very clear in the case of science, in particular, medicine and medicinal advances that have helped us survive the various onslaughts of naturally occurring diseases and circumstances. In that sense, a full and unprepared return to nature as in the above cases could and should be construed as foolish and misguided and certainly not beneficial to the body, mind, and spirit of all and any of those involved.

As mentioned earlier, they all had the means and the luxury to renounce a comfortable life for a lifestyle of unease and unpredictability. At times, it may feel not so much as a form of liberation but perhaps a kind of self-punishment stemming from one’s feeling of enslavement when faced with pain and trauma that one wishes to numb or escape from. Be it as it may, the notion that they are free in the wild and can howl like wolves or run around naked without necessary consequences comes from a romantic past and heritage. And yet, it is fraught with danger and each of them would have to wrestle with their own demons sooner or later.

This is not to say that the rich and wealthy cannot have insights; they can and indeed have, and it is perhaps best demonstrated in Siddhartha Gautama who gave up and sacrificed a life of comfort for his spiritual endeavors. However, I find it rather interesting to contrast the Buddha, a wealthy and privileged prince to Jesus who was born in a manger next to farm animals, rode a donkey, and died with few if any possessions, which I believe is food for thought for another and different kind of post.

Yet this does underscore that although it is important to embrace nature whose majestic beauty we do not appreciate enough, we should not use it as an excuse for not facing our troubles and personal issues. Though being in a retreat or a monastery may provide temporary relief and shelter and serve as a potential incentive for peace and calm inside of us, true peace and happiness await us and come from the inside and that could transform any place and dwelling to make us feel at home by even turning a simple nutshell into a luxurious palace.

The Power of the Individual: Being Yourself and Increasing Your Personal Psychology of Difference

noreply@blogger.com (Arash Farzaneh) — Sun, 04 Feb 2024 19:00:00 +0000

Be yourself no matter what they say. This revolutionary piece of advice is embedded in Sting’s tune “An Englishman in New York” which by all accounts and purposes depicts a relatively mild-mannered Englishman who walks around with a cane, drinks tea instead of coffee, and prefers his sliced bread toasted on one side only. In these small things of everyday life, he stands his ground and as he himself proclaims a gentleman will never run.

By today’s standards, you may not see his stance even remotely as revolutionary or significant, and yet, it is quietly subversive and perhaps much easier said than done. Western culture, which prides itself on individuality, at least in theory and ideology, hardly demonstrates this in practice and in real life. If anything, it is indeed closer to a culture of uniformity and conformity than subversion.

In fact, even those who would stand out before and used to be considered and judged as “weird” or “strange” have now become, for better or worse, embraced and assimilated by the mainstream; now they tend to be if not commonplace then only minimally different from the rest. In a twist of irony, in contemporary society in which weirdness appears to reign and have the upper hand, it is the common, the traditional, and the ordinary that soon shall be standing out like a sore thumb.

In a world where most people drink their coffee at Starbucks, Sting’s Englishman is different and outstanding indeed. Otto Rank talks about this constant push and pull, if not love-hate relationship between the psychology of sameness and that of difference. Yet individuality by definition must exist, develop, and thrive via difference. I cannot be myself if I am predominantly just like you.

Akin to the proverbial black sheep of the family, it is the true individual who carves his or her own and often unique path away from the mob and the masses. In that courageous act of defiance, as a matter of course, these individuals will be scorned, envied, and rejected by all the others who have been caught and lulled in the comfortable web of conformity. Their scorn is also equivalent to a type of punishment for straying from the preset established course set by most people.

Put differently, it is easier (i.e. takes much less effort and courage) to conform and to be like anyone else. Seen from this perspective, the person who does not go along but actually defies the Hitler salute during Nazi Germany (depicted extensively and masterfully in Malick’s true story of A Hidden Life) is a rebel but in today’s world in the background of which any such display is discouraged, frowned upon, or even morally and criminally punished, one could potentially construe the opposite. Morality and commonsense aside, it is the addition of context that defines the act as either cowardly or courageous. A less extreme case would be males coloring their fingernails, which in the past was rather unusual and would have raised an eyebrow or two, while under current circumstances it has been sufficiently norm-alized and become rather a standard fare in most places.

Yet in either case, the above examples are not necessarily individuals who are living and acting following their true nature, but rather people who engage in isolated rebellious acts meant to merely defy the norms. It is like the child who more out of spite than personal conviction opts for the opposite of what the parents tell them to do. And defying norms just for the sake and thrill of defying is not a sign of individuality. In fact, it could be even a sign of conformity if you wish to gain the respect of your clan, tribe, or clique; this is regardless of political affiliation because they are driven by the psychology of sameness and use their supposed demonstrated difference only to fit in, curry favors, or please their own crowd, no matter how big or small that group may be.

In any case, these acts and behaviors are not their own nor unique in the sense of individuality nor are they being themselves in a deep and meaningful fashion. In fact, these types of people are as fickle and perhaps chameleonic as fashion itself as they are being driven and compelled by what is in and trendy at a specific moment of time. Being yourself this is certainly not; it is more a quest for a desperate substitute self because if you are acting in accordance with who you truly are, you are not being guided or swayed by the latest fashion but by your inner guide and compass.

Incidentally, a more extreme case of this would be the attention-grabbing narcissist who would do anything to stand out and be seen as different even though they may not even have a self to begin with or identify with. Full-fledged narcissists tend to copy and paste from others, borrowing what suits them most at a given moment and discarding what does not benefit them personally. They are not themselves, and sadly, they may never be able to be so.

The question arises how you can really be yourself in a culture that pays lip service to individuality while in reality, it discourages and even tends to punish any divergence whatsoever from its fixed and rigid standards and expectations. Anyone who dares to speak differently is under the threat of being expulsed, and this has been more pronounced in the wake of cancel culture. It does not matter what your group or political, ethnic, national, or religious affiliation may be, if you dare to challenge adopted views, you are more often than not excommunicated. Evolutionary speaking, inflicting and receiving this type of reputational damage would be seen and treated as a death sentence.

Returning to our opening statement, it is easy to say it does not matter to us what others say but we do care what others think of us. Since we cannot please everyone (believe me, I have tried for many years), it would be best to become shunned, canceled, or a persona non grata at least for a cause or something that truly resonates with you. The trouble is that you may think and believe something resonates with you or that something is truly worth it but deep inside, you may not really care for it after all, and you may just do it because it makes you look good in other people’s eyes and to artificially increase your self-esteem.

In terms of evolution, we seek and depend upon community, hence sameness, for our physical survival. We also seek sameness and the norm for evaluating and maintaining our sanity because psychologically speaking, being normal means following and adhering to the norm. The norm has undergone many changes and what is seen as outlandish and crazy in the past may be considered as perfectly normal today, and vice versa.

To complicate matters, anyone who stands out from the crowd will instill fears and doubts in the common majority. This is the power of the individual, but it is also its inherent danger because these individuals are an easy target, and they will be attacked from all sides for being different or having a different and less popular opinion. Difference can be physical or psychological in nature but instead of shying away from it, we must not only embrace it within ourselves but also encourage it in others.

At the same time, when all dress and think alike, whether the colors and jerseys of a given sports team or the scary uniformity in clothing and thinking of cults and sects, the one person that is not in alignment will be seen as hostile and is considered the “other”. Our survival instinct comes with the pledge and desire to protect our own kind, be it relations of blood and kin or geography and nationality or culture and religion. It is pitting us against them and living in constant tension and fear of being attacked and eroded by the other or at least imagining and believing these outcomes. This is Otto Rank’s fear of death projected onto the ones that we see as different to ourselves and by extension, our group and supposed immortality comes from identifying with and propagating our own kind of people, whatever that may be for the given person.

With all this comes paranoia and hysteria. Whether it is alleged communists, supposed terrorists, or what-have-you, anyone who does not fit into this predesigned box is seen as a potential threat and danger to the status quo or toward the aims, goals, and ambitions of the specific group. When these emotions mix and blend in with one’s own feelings of anxiety and of wishing to be accepted by our fellow beings, it can get very tricky to just be yourself.

Yet this is the moment where it is important to be setting our own boundaries, affirming, and confirming our own beliefs (not just mindlessly or rapidly adopting or swallowing the beliefs of others but honestly questioning and scrutinizing them), and increasing the difference and potential distance between ourselves and others.

As long as you are true to yourself, to who you are deep inside of yourself, after turning off all the voices that push and pull you in different directions or trying to grab, label, and put you in specific boxes, the voice deep inside of you that remains is your true one. If it is allied and aligned with your intuition, which would be naturally inclined to act out of love and bend towards the highest good, then you are good to go and can be yourself no matter what they say.