As I See It . . .

Energy Conservation - The Need of the Hour

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 02:56:00 +0000

My article in "The Hindu"'s Open Page...

Have we brought power cuts on ourselves?

My earlier article in "The Hindu"'s Open Page...

The six myths about Engineering you should know

Intelligent Vs Brilliant

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 12:17:00 +0000

It is not how much intelligent you are that actually matters. It is how you channelize the intelligence that you have that matters and makes you brilliant - akp

There is one Professor who influenced me a lot (and so did he on several others too!). He is intelligent. But thinking deeply, I feel it is not just his intelligence that brought him the laurels - for I think there are several others whom I have come across who are at least as brilliant as he is but not so renowned. I believe it is his brilliance to channelize what he knew into actions that made a difference in one way or the other that singles him out from the rest!

Man Vs Monkey

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Tue, 15 Dec 2009 16:29:00 +0000

1990s

Then I was a school kid. And, we lived in university quarters (and still we do live at the same place) - my father being a faculty at a medical college. You can imagine the quarters to be a couple of flats - the typical one you must have seen in some movie where lot of kids have fun playing cricket and breaking the window panes of houses [I can cite one movie atleast - Anjali]. And, as my mother often says, "the best part is that you can find no kid at the playground the moment the glass is broken". Every house had a balcony in the front - adjoining the hall. And, some houses like mine had a balcony at the rear end of the house too - adjoining the kitchen. The balcony - I suppose - is meant to serve as a means to sit out leisurely in the evening to enjoy the breeze or the beautiful view of the moon - something the flat system deprives otherwise - as compared to those who stay in an individual house. However, in our quarters it served several other purposes too. One use of it was that it served as a means of communication - telephone having not made its way into the middle class homes then. Kids and ladies - equally - would be seen talking to their friends from the balcony. Another use of it was to wash the utensils - the kitchen being nearer to it. And, some others even washed their clothes there. Usually, those houses where they washed the clothes/utensils in the balcony would have a tap brought out to the balcony from the kitchen so as to avoid carrying water in a bucket every time.

All was well - with the balconies being a important area of the household - till the time the monkeys found their way to the quarters - in search of food. They would come in large numbers and enter into the house either through the balcony door or through the windows - if they are open. Now, the balconies which once served as the means of chit-chat among the ladies and kids turned to be the way to communicate the arrival of monkeys. Often someone would be shouting out aloud,"Aunty onga veetla korangu" [translates in English as, "Aunty, there is a monkey in your house"]. But as the monkey menace increased, a request was made and all the houses soon had a wire mesh door for the windows [so that the main window would still be open for air to come in but at the same time the monkeys cannot enter the house]. Now, we kids had fun looking at the monkeys sitting outside. And, one such day - as I was watching the monkeys, something caught my eye. A monkey that was sitting at one of the houses was trying to open the tap that had been provided to wash clothes. I was amazed that a monkey had the brains to know that the tap - if opened - would provide a means to quench its thirst. I called my mother and showed it to her. She replied, "Yes. I have seen it opening the tap several times before". As I watched, the monkey successfully opened the tap and started drinking water. I was awe-struck and started to wonder if the monkey had so much intelligence, can it do whatever man could do? I was confused as to what exactly differentiates the monkey from a man - if it could THINK! By that time the monkey had finished drinking water to its need and then it happened... The monkey started moving away - without closing the tap. Immediately, I got the answer to my question. The monkey's thinking was driven by need. It had seen water flowing out when the knob was rotated. It learnt it because it needed water. Once its thirst was quenched, there was no "need" to think. In fact, this cannot be thought of as a process of thinking. It is a natural instinct ("a survival effort" - if I have to quote it the way my father would have referred to it!) that drove it to open the tap. It was just a simple event - but it stayed at some corner of my mind through the 90s and into the 2000s when something prompted it to pop out from the corner where it was lying idle all those years...

2000s

Throughout the 2000s I stayed away from home - doing my B.E, working in a software firm for a year, doing my M.Tech and currently doing my Ph.D. And, much of these years were spent at hostels - at three different institutes (at three different states) - all government institutes and were supposed to be places were some of the best minds of the country studied. It was at these hostels that I was reminded of the monkeys now and then. At times (in my B.E it was "many times"), there used to be water shortage in the hostels and one would wake up in the morning to find the taps dry. As I have seen - in all the institutes that I stayed - invariably, one would find many people not closing the tap after seeing that there is no water. Especially, if the water had stopped in the night, it would be those few people like me who wake up early - who would have to run around closing the taps. Now, this reminded me of the monkeys - monkeys that did not close the tap once they had their need satisfied. One of the characters that separated it from human community. I wonder if one did not have the common sense to close the tap foreseeing the water that might get wasted once water was available, what difference do they have from those monkeys? It is not just about closing the tap. I get angry seeing people who just care for themselves and not bother about others - those selfish people who do not think beyond themselves. The people who park their vehicle on the way obstructing the path for the others in my hostel basement and in the mess, the people who do not bring shuttles to the badminton court just because the shuttles are costly, people in the lab who would not bother to switch off the lights when they are the last to go out, people in the lab who do not wish to do anything that concerns the lab (and think that "someone" would do it), people who leave the lights on in their room, the list goes endless. It is not just the institute I talk about. You can see selfish acts of humans at every public place you go. I feel that common sense is an important character that alienates us from the animals. When that is lost, man is still just a monkey wearing a dress and moving around in a scooter. And, it is a pity that many times, education takes away the "common sense" man otherwise naturally has [To put it the other way, once educated - a lot of people become more concerned about themselves and themselves alone]. Next time you do something, just for a moment - think if you would like to be a MAN or a MONKEY.

Ph.D Rules...

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 12:52:00 +0000

Over the last two and a half years of doing a Ph.D, I learnt a few things and I wrote the same as tag lines on my Orkut profile. These five Ph.D rules appeared over a period of five days on my Orkut profile - one per day. Considering the viewership it brought about and considering that some of them missed a few of the rules... I thought I can compile them and make it a blog post. Here is the compilation (thanks to my memory... I could remember all those five rules which I wrote!):

1. Do not do things in a way that satisfies others (includes your guide too); Do things in a way that satisfies yourself!

2. Decide not the time-frame within which you would like to finish your PhD; Decide on the learning you would like to have - doing your PhD.

3. Your PhD ends the day you get the confidence to work independently and solve the problems that arise in your field of interest.

4. Do not blame your guide. It does not help. Do things in such a way that you and your guide remain happy.

5. Pursue atleast one non-academic activity that you are passionate about. Know that there is life outside your lab too!

Decisions

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 19:23:00 +0000

Decisions – that is what our daily life is filled with most of the time. It might be as simple as to decide whether to get up once the alarm goes off in the morning or it might be so important a decision like whether one has to join a job or opt for higher studies. Many a time, I have seen people (of course it includes me too!) committing two (too?) biggest mistakes while taking decisions. I have done it myself – at least one of them and atleast once in my life. And, I was about to do it again. There was a thing I had to decide over – something that had been pressing me for around a week or so. It did not let me concentrate on my research. I had almost done one of those two mistakes which people commonly make while taking decisions. But today suddenly, I realized what I was doing and stopped myself from doing the mistake. My mind became clear. And, I thought it was time again for me to sit down and pen my thoughts… And, here you go into my realm of thoughts…

The first mistake people make is that they let others take decisions for them. The second mistake they make is that they take the decisions first and then try to come up with satisfying logic to convince themselves that their decision is correct.

Having told that there are two big mistakes that people generally make, let me state them first. The first mistake people make is that they let others take decisions for them. The second mistake they make is that they take the decisions first and then try to come up with satisfying logic to convince themselves that their decision is correct. Both the mistakes are equally destructive – especially when the decision is crucial for one’s future.

At times, people come to me asking suggestions as to what they have to do. Typically, they would describe a situation and would expect me to decide what they should do under that situation in which they find themselves at that point of time (Most of them are people who had known me as a person who writes a lot of blogs that sound convincingly logical that they think that my decisions would always be right!). I generally would tell my suggestion and then add up saying that it was their life and that it would be wise to take suggestions from anyone including me but that the decision they take must be their own self. One should understand that their issues are best understood only by themselves and that the decisions can be proper only if they decide – as they are the ones who would be knowing the bigger picture of it (When I say bigger picture I mean that there might be different factors that might have to be considered while taking the decision and others might not be aware of all those factors). I remember a long time back my parents when they wanted to shift from the rented house that we were in into the university quarters, they took the decision by writing chits and asking me to pick one of them [I was a small kid then and they thought that God (in my form!!!) let them take the right decision. I still remember being both worried and happy to do that at that time. Worried – because I wanted to shift to the quarters as it was something new for me and I certainly did not want myself being the reason for not shifting should I pick out the chit that said we should not shift. And, happy - because it was me and not my sister who was given the once in a lifetime opportunity to pick out the chit!]. It was several years later that I thought about that incident and wondered how people could let their decisions taken not by logic but by pure chance. I would say that it is one of the biggest mistakes one could do.

Considering the second mistake, I would as usual try to elaborate with an incident. When I came to know of pre-marital sex affairs happening at the institutes I studied (both at the institute where I did my M.Tech and where I currently do my Ph.D, I understand that this is not so common but does exist), I thought I should write about my views on it in my blogspot. But, when I started to think of my views on it, I understood something. My views were largely biased as it had already been driven into my mind that it was wrong to have sex before marriage. And, as everyone would agree – in India – even talking about or using the word ‘sex’ is considered to be a taboo. Having been brought up under such an environment, I could not help fixing my view (that it is wrong to have pre-marital sexual affairs) first and then coming up with some logic to prove my view to be correct. So, I never wrote that post and probably would never write about it in future too (I feel that some things that are driven into one’s mind in childhood can never be changed). Most of the readers of my blog believe that my views on various issues are highly logical and true. It is because when I write about my views, I start with a clear mindset. I do not fix my conclusions first. I rather try to think about the issue through logical reasoning. The conclusion is the result of the logical discussion I have within myself on the issue. This holds good even when one takes decisions in their life. Decisions would be correct only when they are arrived at through logical reasoning. Trying to attach some reasoning to a blindly taken decision makes no sense.

“Mind” knows only logic. Further it can take inputs from the “heart” and can reason out if what the “heart” says is sensible. The “mind” does not have emotions. On the other hand, “heart” knows no common sense logic. It is largely driven by emotions.

Whenever humans are in the process of decision making, there usually are two things within them that actively participate. To differentiate the two, let me call them “the mind” and “the heart”. “Mind” knows only logic. Further it can take inputs from the “heart” and can reason out if what the “heart” says is sensible. The “mind” does not have emotions. On the other hand, “heart” knows no common sense logic. It is largely driven by emotions. Love, affection, hatred, jealousy and the like – these are what it knows.

To make myself clear, I have to give you a few examples. One fine Sunday morning, I had throat infection at its beginning stages. I took some ayurvedic medicine which usually cures it better than the antibiotic that the doctor prescribes (If you would like to try it out, just mail me. It really works well!). When it was lunch time I remembered that they give ice-cream in my mess on Sunday afternoons. Now, I had to take a decision on whether to eat the ice-cream or not. And, I obviously liked ice-creams very much. I thought for a moment. My “mind” advised me not to eat. My “heart” knew I loved it. It asked me not to worry but to eat as I was already taking the medicine. I let my “heart” take the decision. And, in the next two days, the throat infection worsened and in addition I got fever too (Of course, I could not eat ice-cream for the next two weeks). To give you another example, once I was down with some illness. And, it did not seem to be getting cured that easily. My mother was too worried. And, at that time some one told that a piece of cloth given to her probably months earlier had to be tied at the temple of a particular God and should not be kept at home. They suggested that it probably was the cause for my continued illness. Now, my mother let her “heart” take the decision. She wanted the cloth to be immediately tied at the temple. Unfortunately, the cloth was not found. My mother was getting worried and my father was getting angrier. Finally the cloth was somehow found and it was tied at the temple. In a few days, I began to recover from the illness and my mother believed that it had something to do with the cloth also. So, decisions based on “heart” might not just be wrong. But they might also be foolish. By now, you should certainly have understood what I mean by “mind” and “heart”.

“Those decisions taken by “heart” will many a time be wrong. Those decisions taken by the “mind” would always be right but not the best for the situation. Those decisions taken by the “mind” with inputs from the “heart” is what would always be the best.”

Immediately, if you jump to the conclusion that one should always let the “mind” take the decision, it is not really correct. To understand that, let us consider that a neighbour gives three pieces of a sweet to a mother whose kid likes the sweet so much. If the mother lets her “mind” make a decision, she would give one each to her husband and kid and would have the third one for herself. As I told earlier, the “mind” knows only logic and nothing else. But, if she were to let her “heart” decide, she would be giving one sweet to her husband and would give the rest two to her kid. Obviously, now we have a problem as to when to let the “mind” take the decision and when to let the “heart” take the decision. The solution is simple. Though the “mind” can think of just logic, it can analyze what the “heart” says and can come to a conclusion on whether what the heart says is sensible. It would be acceptable to the “mind” to give two pieces of the sweet to the kid. To put it in three simple statements, I would say: “Those decisions taken by “heart” will many a time be wrong . Those decisions taken by the “mind” would always be right but not the best for the situation. Those decisions taken by the “mind” with inputs from the “heart” is what would always be the best.”

Decisions make up life. Decide yourself how you would take decisions the next time you find yourselves at crossroads in your life.

Of Marriages [Part II]

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 13:28:00 +0000

Reading my first post in this series, if you had come to a conclusion that I am in trying to say that love marriage is the best, you are wrong. As I had mentioned in my first post, I am just trying to put forth my views on Indian marriages (or probably south-Indian or more precisely marriages in TamilNadu!). In this post I am laying down my views on love marriages in India.

"In love marriage one has a lot of expectations since he/she knows his/her spouse for a long time. So, when they start to live together, any small deviation from what they had imagined will be a big blow in love marriage"

As I had pointed out in my first post, love marriages provide solution to a lot of issues that arise in the case of arranged marriages. And, in addition, there are more positive points in the case of love marriages - they help us create a caste-less society; and generally there will be no issue of dowry and there is no requirement to verify the details of the spouse [this becomes important as I have heard in recent times - some stories of guys (living abroad) cheating the bride's parents with wrong information about their job or concealing the fact that they are already married]. However, love marriages too have pitfalls. When someone falls in love, everything about his/her lover seems to be good if not great! To tell the fact, both the girl and the boy in love projects the better half of them to the other. The reality strikes only when they start living together. For then, they look at each other from close quarters… In one way arranged marriage is better than love marriage. In arranged marriage there are fewer expectations since the spouse is a total stranger. But in love marriage one has a lot of expectations since he/she knows his/her spouse for a long time. So, when they start to live together, any small deviation from what they had imagined will be a big blow in love marriage. So, all I can say is, "If you love, don't be in a hurry to propose the girl/boy. First get yourself clarified if it is really 'love' or just an attraction. Try to know more about the person before you propose or accept a proposal. If you have the slightest doubt that things could go wrong after marriage, don't propose. And, in case you start loving, don't let your imaginations fly high - till the time you get married and start living together".

My mother once pointed out that in love marriages, things like food habits might cause havoc. I could not comprehend the point she made. Then, my mother explained: Suppose two people from different states love each other. There is very less chance that they might think about the difference in their food habits – before marriage. But, once married, they will start realizing that they cannot adjust with the food their spouse likes. Now, food being a daily issue will indirectly cause problems. At that time, I had less real- life experience to accept that [Actually my immediate thought was (though I did not tell this to my mom!), "I like Punjabi food more than south-Indian food. So do you mean to say that I can love a Punjabi girl?"]. But then, after staying in the hostel and then traveling to different places, I understood the truth in her statement. Though it might seem silly, small things like food do matter really when it comes to living together. Here, arranged marriage helps since generally we choose people who have a similar background as ourselves. So, food and daily habits will be similar if not same as that of ours. This – my mother says – is the reason for people to search alliance at places in and around their hometown.

"If people are ready to leave their parents who had played an important role in making them what they are today, then it is highly likely that they may not be true in any of their relationship."

Another issue about love marriages is the decision made by some lovers to leave their parents for the sake of their love. I do not support such a decision. If people are ready to leave their parents who had played an important role in making them what they are today, then it is highly likely that they may not be true in any of their relationship. Even if they are true to their spouse, there are other issues. There was this guy – a roommate of mine at the college – whose parents had separated from his grandparents (both paternal and maternal) for the sake of their love. He used to say, "As a kid, whenever summer vacations begin, I will see people leaving to their grandparents' house. But I had to stay home since I had no relatives. And, whenever others speak about their grandparents (on returning from vacation), I would simply walk away from that place. I never knew how it would feel having grandparents and other relatives." One might think that leaving their parents would be a good option. But then, by doing that they are depriving their children of what they are entitled to. And, surely they don't have the right to do so. So, all I would say is that, one should try to convince his/her parents to accept their lover. In case it is not possible, I would advice one to do what his/her parents say. This obviously necessitates one to tell their parents of their love at a very early stage.

Considering all those things that I have seen happening around me, I would say that there are several things that require deep thinking before decisions are made in case of a marriage – be it arranged or love marriage. Anyhow, from my point of view, the order of marriage options that might lead to a better married life is (anyhow, this does not mean that I would follow this order as a rule... it all depends on circumstances...):

Conventional love marriage.
Arranged marriage to someone one had known for a long time.
Love marriage where either the girl or the boy had only loved the other person but the other person had no reason to say no to the proposal.
Arranged marriage where the bride is chosen by some good logical means.
Conventional arranged marriage.

Of Marriages [Part I]

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 07:17:00 +0000

In India, "marriage" is the most celebrated event – more than any other festival I could think of. May be it is because this event happens to be a turning point in the life of those getting into wedlock (whether the turning point turns out to be good or bad is a entirely different story!) or probably it is because marriage is a sort of family get-together – the only event where you meet many of your otherwise not-in-touch relatives. And, at 25 I thought of this grand Indian event and that resulted in this article. Unlike my other articles, here I am not trying to come to any conclusion of what is better – love or arranged marriage. Rather, I am just laying down my views on both love and arranged marriage. There is a reason for doing so: Life does not have "Two plus Two equals Four" sort of rules. Rules of life differ from person to person – what might be applicable to me, might not suit you. So, I leave the conclusion to you – the readers. In this first part of the article, I lay down my views on arranged marriage...

Looking at a typical Indian way of selecting a bride/bridegroom, here is what happens (If at any step the result is negative, people generally go back to step 2):

Parents ask relatives to inform them of any prospective bride/bridegroom. Also matrimonial columns of newspapers will be made use of (now-a-days, matrimonial sites in internet are also widely used).
Based on the inputs received, the bride/bridegroom will be short-listed on a variety of basis. In case of a bride search, it is mostly based on the looks (invariably all guys want slim girls with a fair complexion... if only the creator had known this!), dowry (I wonder if the word will be out of the dictionary ever!) and education (of course guys want their wife to be educated enough to present herself in the society!). In case of the groom search, it is mostly based on the salary (simple theory, "money = happiness"), education (required to earn money) and looks (of course their daughter might reject otherwise!). [Going through some matrimonial advertisements on the internet, one would find that the word "god-fearing" being used often by both parties... I wonder if those people who write it used to commit serious crimes that they keep 'fearing' God instead of having 'faith' or 'love' towards Him!].
A preliminary enquiry about the bride/bridegroom is made through known people (especially in the groom search... to know if the boy smokes/drinks, etc).
Horoscopes are exchanged at this point (optional).
If things are fine, photos are exchanged (this is skipped in case it had been done at step 2. Sometimes, at step 2, the looks are judged only through the inputs given by relatives/matrimonial ads).
The boy/girl is shown the photograph and provided the details about the bride/bridegroom and asked for opinion.
The bridegroom meets the bride at her place (or at a common place) and both parties agree if they like each other (no one knows how they conclude that!).

Going through the above steps, one can easily see that the boy/girl makes his/her decision mostly based on the 'looks' alone and nothing more, nothing less. There are two major things that make me feel that (this type of) arranged marriages have high probability to go astray…

"In arranged marriage, even after marriage, your spouse would still be a stranger to you. It is in one way like throwing two people in an uninhabited island – they don't have any other choice but to start liking each other no matter what differences they have!"

Firstly, I don't understand how one would be able to select a life partner just by the looks and then start believing that he/she loves that person more than anyone and/or anything else on earth and that he/she can trust that person completely and can share all his/her secrets/feelings (It brings me laughter to think of meeting a girl who is a total stranger – a few months before marriage – and then telling her the day after the marriage: "Darling, You are my life!"). I will make my point more clear: In life, we get into relationships by two means – one is by birth (I refer to Father, Mother, siblings and the whole lot of aunts, uncles and grandparents who come into our life by our birth) and the other is by choice (I refer to friends and others whom we like to be in touch with). The reason we get along well with those in the first category is that we are with them from the time we are born (or from the time they are born, in case they are younger to us) and so we get used to their way of life and thinking. We adjust with them even if we have conflicting ideals and mindset. The reason we are able to cope up with those in the second category is that 'we choose them'. We don’t make choices just at the instant we meet someone. We take decisions based on their behaviour, their way of life, their attitude and the like. To tell the truth, except for our parents and siblings (and may be grandparents can also be included), we always have the choice to decide with whom we should be close to. When this is the case, how can one make the decision of selecting a life partner just within a few minutes without knowing much about him/her? I do not understand how one - while thinking a lot to choose his/her friends and others with whom he/she should be close to – can make an important decision as this, without much thinking. The point is this: "In arranged marriage, even after marriage, your spouse would still be a stranger to you. It is in one way like throwing two people in an uninhabited island – they don't have any other choice but to start liking each other no matter what differences they have!" In simple words, in arranged marriages people are "forced" into liking each other.

"...if I want my wife to be broad-minded – wise enough to accept logically convincing facts, how can I ensure that through our present system of selecting a life partner?"

Second is the issue of "clash over core ideals/values". Everyone has some core values and/or ideals around which their life revolves. They are those things for which they will die for and they are those things for which they will not compromise even with their parents or siblings (with whom they generally adjust over other issues). In arranged marriages there is a higher probability that there will be a clash over some/all of the core values/ideals. To make my point clear, let us assume that you always like to be honest whereas your spouse turns out to be one who takes bribe at his/her office and in case your spouse is so obsessed with bribery that he/she cannot stop that habit. Then, how would life be? This is in fact a very imaginative example of mine that you might be able to throw up arguments against it in case you are a bit smart. To lessen your burden, I would do that myself… one can easily make "honesty" a necessary condition during the matrimonial search (or probably in the advertisement one gives in newspaper/website) and it "would" (or rather "might") solve the problem. Or a better way might be to choose a spouse whose job has no chance for bribery. But, that was just an example and there are a thousand things that the (present way of) matrimonial search cannot ensure. To make things more clear here is another example. Supposing that I get married and have a daughter and that when she attains puberty my wife wants to share the news with relatives – as is the practice in India (generally in houses where people are more conservative, a customary function will also follow the announcement). Now, I would not certainly allow this. I may not even allow her to tell the news (I use the word 'news' here just to make it appear the same way as people think… but for that it is no 'news' at all!) to her/my parents. As for me, it is just a natural biological phenomenon, which does not require publicity. For me, it is a bad social practice that has to be stopped. Why do you want to go around announcing that a girl is ready to reproduce? That was a practice that was followed in olden days when people wanted to get their daughters married off as soon as possible. Now, how do I know that the girl I choose as my life partner will be someone who understands and accepts this? Put in other way, if I want my wife to be broad-minded – wise enough to accept logically convincing facts, how can I ensure that through our present system of selecting a life partner? I certainly can’t imagine living with someone who cannot agree with something that is logically correct. This is what I term it as the "clash over core ideals". When you have a spouse who cannot agree or adjust with your core ideals, your marriage life is bound to be a disaster.

Now, you may ask me if I mean to say that I will not adjust with my wife over anything. My answer is, I would. In fact 'adjusting with the life partner' is the basis of married life. But then, there is some difference between 'adjusting' and 'compromising over core values'. For example, I generally don't like to go to temples on special occasions when there will be too much rush as I believe that concentration is the basis of prayer and one cannot concentrate in that crowd. But if it turns out that my wife likes going to temple on special occasions, I would certainly take her even without herself telling me. This is 'adjustment'. But, if she wants to go there and participate in the ritual of walking on hot coal (as is the practice in many Indian temples), I might not agree with her, as it is one of the worst superstitious beliefs. More than much concerned about the harm it might do to her feet, I believe that it will set a wrong example to my children. Also, I believe that superstitious beliefs should never be supported by any educated person. Now, this is 'core principle' which 'cannot be compromised'. In case my wife turns out to be one who can compromise over this, it is fine. But, if it is something that she considers as important to her and cannot compromise, things become difficult.

There is yet another question you might ask me: "Then, what do you tell about the fact that most of the arranged marriages are successful?" My answer would be, firstly we cannot come to any conclusion like this since we do not know exactly how many are really satisfied with their married life. In case the statement is really true then, it would be primarily because people have been made to think that it is the way life goes [They might think that things like marriage and spouse are determined even before birth and that God writes the name of one's spouse somewhere on the head (and certainly not visible to human eye!) at the time of creation!] and nothing can be done about it. So, probably they had prepared themselves for the Indian way of marriage and married life. While it might suit those who don't question age old customs, it might not suit people who tend to write long blogs out of them.

"...probably we can think of using blogspots in the place of horoscopes and live chat and phone in the place of photographs."

To tell the truth, I don't hate arranged marriages. All I don't like is the way in which we find a bride/bridegroom. It certainly needs a change. I believe that we need to rethink from scratch to arrive at a better way of finding a good life partner. Probably we can think of using blogspots in the place of horoscopes and live chat and phone in the place of photographs. Also, we need to change the priorities that are used in selecting the bride/bridegroom. Instead of the job or looks, we need to give more importance to the common interests of the people involved, their expectations and the like. Probably we can try something like marrying someone with similar thoughts as ourselves - whom we meet at the workplace or college. In this regard, love marriage is a good option as it solves many of the issues that I have put forth... but wait that was just a remark... to know about my complete opinion about love marriages (and also about some other view points about arranged marriages), await my next post...

"Of Marriages [Part II]"

Science and Engineering

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 13:37:00 +0000

“Science is the foundation over which the building of Engineering stands. The building (Engineering) cannot exist without the foundation (Science) and the foundation (Science) alone is of no use.” - akp

Why did it happen?

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 06:24:00 +0000

“Some things happen just because they have to happen” - akp

Some things that happen in life make us ask, “Why did it happen that way?” At times we like to go back in time to stop/change the event that had eventually led to something “happening that way”. We would like all those things that had led to “that” to become a dream so that we can wake up and find life to be smooth. Everyone experiences this at some point in life and life becomes miserable when one thinks more about it and wants to answer the question, “Why did it happen?” Of course there is an answer to every question (about life) and this too has an answer. But why life becomes miserable is that the situation is so complex that people expect the answer to be complex too. But, actually the answer is simple. And, more than just being simple, the answer is invariably the same for all those situations that make people raise the question, “Why did it happen that way?” The answer is what I have quoted above. “Some things happen just because they have to happen”.

I know: You would not accept this. This would seem ridiculous. You might argue that this is not an answer in the first place since it does not explain anything. I told you, “the answer is simple”. And, the simplicity is what puzzles people. And, those who understand and accepts this answer will lead a happy life.

Expectations ruin life...

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Thu, 10 May 2007 12:17:00 +0000

'Uncertainity' is the basis of life. So, don't have expectations. Have goals and work towards them. But never expect that you will always end up with success. - akp.

The 'Men Of Honour' Series

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Sun, 07 Jan 2007 14:25:00 +0000

I intend to write a series of posts titled “Men of Honour”. The series will be about people who have taught me great values of life. They are ordinary people whom I have come across in my journey of life. I know not the names of many of them. Yet, they made me think and they influenced me. Some of the people who would find a mention are: the farmer in the bus who argued with a person who tried to convert him to Christianity – his views on religion and God amazed me; my house owner at Mysore – from whom I learnt a lot about social service, patriotism and life on the whole; two young students (in bus) both of them deaf and dumb – who taught me a strong lesson on hope; the village schoolmaster – whose views on education left me dumbfounded; my Tae-kwon-do master and a mess worker – both of whom taught me a lot about dedication at work; the list will keep extending…

There are some things that need a mention at this stage. Firstly, there are several others who do not figure in this series but influenced me. I do not mention them intentionally since they are too close to make a mention in my own blogspot. If I write about them, it would be nothing short of boasting. Secondly – about the title, it is just to attract the readers. So, it in no way means that I honour only men… I will write about women too in this series – if someone does influence me. The first post in this series will appear soon…

Internet – The +ve Side [Part I]

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Thu, 26 Oct 2006 13:29:00 +0000

This is not a serious write-up about internet. I just share two of my experiences [in two parts] – one that I had at Orkut and the other that I experienced at blogspot

Looking at the subject one might very well think that it might not be worthy of a read since the +ve and –ve sides of internet are being discussed from the time internet became popular. The answer to this is that, here I am not writing about the usual things that have already been talked of. In fact, this is not a serious write-up about internet. I just share two of my experiences [in two parts] – one that I had at Orkut and the other that I experienced at blogspot. This part might very well be a good choice for a leisure-time read. [Caution: If you don’t have an Orkut account what follows might seem Greek and Latin]

It was a fine Sunday morning in March. I entered my department computer centre only to find people sitting glued to the computer monitor. Without even going nearer to any of them I could easily tell that it was "Orkut" which was keeping them busy. I had got used to seeing this. Anyhow, today I was not in a mood to study so I thought of exploring myself - what made my classmates spend all their out-of-class time at "Orkut" [I did not have an Orkut account then]. Soon, I got an invite from one of my classmates and had an account for myself. The next one-hour went in filling up the profile and scrapping some unknown people chosen at random. Then, as I explored further, I saw the "communities" feature. So, I searched for my school in the communities. My school name is - say - "Xyz Matriculation Higher Secondary School". So, I searched for "Xyz School" and it did yield several results – none of which turned out to be my school. By that time it was lunchtime and I left.

The next day, when I went to the computer centre I was eager to see if anyone had replied to my scraps. But then no one had replied. So, I thought that I lacked the skill to speak to strangers and so I wanted to delete my account in Orkut. But before doing so I thought of giving one try for my school community again. This time I changed my search keyword. I used the abbreviation for my school name. Never did I think that this one search was going to make something unbelievable happen...

That search did give a link to a community created for my school people. It had been created just 5 days before I had searched and the sole member was the owner of the community - a girl. All I could know was that the girl lived in Canada and she called herself - say - "abc" in Orkut. Anyhow I joined the community and left a scrap in her scrapbook asking her to introduce herself. I was expecting her to ask me if I had really studied in that school. But the next day she replied saying that she knew me very well. She not only told my full name correctly [I had not given my full name in Orkut at that time] but also reminded me of myself having burnt my hand during a Deepavali 15 yrs back. I was astonished at the reply but guessed that she must either be my classmate or my sister's classmate. The next day she mailed me and she was indeed my classmate.
What happened actually is that... 13 yrs back when I entered 7th standard (11 yrs old), a girl from my class left the school. All we (me and my classmates) knew at that time was that she was going to US as her father got a job there. The girl was none other than the "abc" I met in Orkut. Actually she had left for Quebec, Canada. What happened at her side once she left the school is what makes things unbelievable. Having been in India for 11 yrs, she had developed closeness with the Indian culture (basically she is not an Indian) and so when she left the school she had taken the contact addresses of many of my classmates. But, during a change of flight at Singapore she had missed the address book. From that time all she could remember was the name of majority of her classmates. Her search for her classmates began once she was introduced to the internet – with the only information of the names of several of her classmates which needed no address book to recollect. She chatted always with Indians - especially south Indians... with the belief that one day she might catch up with one of her classmates… she cross-checked every time she came across a person who had the same name as one of her classmates… and years passed - THIRTEEN in number - but with no result. So, when she opened an account in Orkut, she searched for our school - only to get disappointed to see that none of the thousands of students who had studied there had created a community. Then, she created the community by herself and to her surprise and joy the first person to join the community was her classmate (myself). It was a memorable day in her life as finally all her efforts gave some result!

But the reality was well evident only when I got a call from her from Canada three days after I had met her through Orkut. It took me some time even to understand her accent... I had to ask her to repeat what she said - most of the time - to understand her words

After that, I chatted with her through yahoo the next two days. At that time, all I was thinking was that I was chatting with an eleven-year-old girl as I had only the faint memory of her face - when she had left - in my mind. Though I did understand that she would not be the same as 13 yrs back, less did I think that 13 yrs is so big a gap... But the reality was well evident only when I got a call from her from Canada three days after I had met her through Orkut. It took me some time even to understand her accent... I had to ask her to repeat what she said - most of the time - to understand her words. From what she spoke, I could understand that she was bold, broad-minded and I felt that she would not have got even half of those characters had she been in my town in India. I promised her to get her in touch with as many of our 7th standard classmates as possible. When she listed the names of more than 10 of them (and also our maths teacher's name) I realized how many years had passed and also wondered why I had never thought about them all these years. All she says is, "for you people in India, it might not matter... but for me it is a treasure to get in touch with my classmates". The main reason she had been searching for our classmates is that we are the only people in India whom she knows (none of her relatives are in India) and she still has a liking towards Indian culture (She talks Tamil pretty fluently, likes going to the temple wearing saree, hates those Indians who come to Canada and forget our traditional values, … the list goes on). She wants to come to India some day and walk through the same places she had once walked and meet the people who had once been her classmates at school. After talking to her I could not help thinking whether we people in India do not know the real value of our tradition.

"More than just helping in getting information about various things, internet helps in building and maintaining relationships"

I still am not able to believe that someone had been searching for my classmates and me for the past 10 years - sitting at a place several thousand miles away. Without the advances in technology and the presence of internet - I don’t think that it would have been possible for her to establish contact with me. I would say, "More than just helping in getting information about various things, internet helps in building and maintaining relationships".

Dowry

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Wed, 25 Oct 2006 06:13:00 +0000

[Excerpts from my mail to my college and school groups]

As everyone knows and would agree, getting dowry is certainly wrong and does not conform to the practices of a civilized society. In spite of this, even the educated still get/give dowry. There are several questions that I would like to try answering (and in that process lay down my views on the issue): Why people practised giving dowry and is it relevant today? How many still get dowry? What makes people still follow the age-old custom? And finally, what can be done to stop this practice?

Taking up the first of the list of questions, I remember my mother telling me that it must have been followed in olden days just because girls were not sent to school. Her explanation is quite satisfactory. What she says is that parents must have given dowry – mostly in gold – at the time of marriage of their daughter as a means to bring up her children should anything happen to her husband. Obviously, since girls were not given education nor were they allowed to go out much, it must have been the only means to ensure that life went on well. The gold must have served as jewels and in case of any unforeseen thing happening, it would have been sold. But today girls are given education and they explore the world around them. Is it not high time that we think of changing an age-old custom, which is not relevant today?

If you think that dowry refers only to those things that are 'demanded' from the girl's parents at the time of marriage, you are seriously wrong. Dowry not only refers to things that are 'openly demanded' but also to those that are 'expected though not demanded'

To the next question, how many people still get dowry? I would say, "Almost everyone". You might not readily accept this. To make my point clear, a proper definition of what constitutes dowry is certainly required. If you think that 'dowry' refers only to those things that are 'demanded' from the girl's parents at the time of marriage, you are seriously wrong. Dowry not only refers to things that are 'openly demanded' but also to those that are 'expected though not demanded'. Now-a-days people – especially the educated – do not want to explicitly ask dowry, as they know that it is wrong (their conscience pricks). So, they just 'expect dowry'. In case they are 'offered' less or no dowry they surely will cite other reasons to stop the marriage proposal (astrology helps them a lot here!). There is rarely any marriage where the girl's parents do not give any gold and/or cash as dowry. I tell you, "Even if a guy does not ask for dowry, but the girl’s parents give, still the guy is morally responsible for that and he deserves to be punished at his conscience's court".

The main reason for people to still follow this practice is that they consider dowry as a means to show off their status. The more they get dowry, the higher is their status! (The truth is that the girl’s parents also think that it is a mark of status and they tend to give more… most of the time more than what they can afford to give!) Also, both the parties fear the society. They are not ready to face the questions of their relatives who will pester them asking about the dowry given/taken. What nobody seems to think is that society is nothing but themselves. This answers the third question, "Why people still follow the custom?"

The solution - I feel - is that boys should make it a point that they do not take anything - gold or cash (the few ornaments the girl regularly wears alone can be exempted)

Finally the important question is what can be done to put an end to this practice of getting dowry? The solution – I feel – is that boys should make it a point that they do not take anything – gold or cash (the few ornaments the girl regularly wears alone can be exempted). Of course, the boy has to convince his parents, his relatives and also the girl's parents (convincing the girl's parents implicitly includes convincing her relatives also). I do know that this is easier said than done. While the boy's parents might very well accept the fact that getting dowry is a wrong practice, they might have apprehensions about the questions they have to face from their relatives (after all, the relatives will not question the boy. They will only ask his parents and they might even say that their son is still a "kid" and his words are to be ignored). Coming to the case of the girl’s parents, they might insist on giving gold and/or cash saying that they are giving it just as a gift for their daughter or they might say that they have already made all the ornaments for their daughter (thinking that they may not be able to find a boy who does not ask for dowry!). Though they cite different reasons the reality will be just that they too fear facing the questions of relatives. The trouble might not be as simple as stated above. A boy who insists getting no dowry might sometimes have to face more problems. A sample is that, people might think that the boy has some serious illness (now-a-days people just don’t believe that there might be some good people around).

Now there are some valid questions you might ask. Why can't it be that the girl's parents really want to give something as a gift to their daughter at the time of marriage? I would say, in most of the cases people go beyond their affordable level to give the 'gift' (if at all it can be called so). Moreover, I wonder why parents think of giving gifts only to their daughter and not to their son. The simple reason is that still we follow the practice of handing over the parental property to the son (and the son in return is expected to take care of his parents). Excluding girls from having their share of parental property and giving them the choice of not caring about their parents are two more things that I do hate but then I don't want to mix up those issues with the current discussion. Anyhow, if the girl's parents insist too much on giving something as a gift to their daughter, the boy can ask them to give it in cash - but not at the time of marriage. Instead, he can ask them to give that when his child goes to college so that it will be used for the child's education. Now, you might wonder whether this does not constitute dowry. There are several reasons why I suggest this:

Once the boy gets married, he can convince the girl's parents to use the money for themselves.

Sometimes changes can be expected to happen only in phases. This can be considered as a step ahead towards putting an end to the practice of getting/giving dowry.
Money spent on education is always worthy.

Another valid question might be, "If there are many problems (as I have mentioned previously) in trying to stop the practice, why try stopping it at all? Let it happen when it happens". My point is that if you want to see changes, you can't dream of something to happen by itself. You know it is wrong to give/take dowry and you want it to be stopped but you want to dream of that happening on its own. Every change has to be initiated. Will you be one of those who initiate a change is what you should think of!

One of my classmates once told, "Girls, know your value. Don't give dowry." I would like to add the following line to it: "Guys, respect their (girls') value. Don't take dowry"

Whenever I happen to hear of incidents wherein the parents of an educated girl spend a lot of money as dowry, I wonder why people don't understand and respect the self-esteem of a (educated) girl. Doesn’t the girl's parents shatter her self-esteem in a minute by giving dowry? I further don't understand what respect a girl will have over a boy who accepts dowry (eventhough he becomes her husband). One of my classmates once told, "Girls, know your value. Don't give dowry." I would like to add the following line to it: "Guys, respect their (girls') value. Don't take dowry".

You might very well ask why throughout the article I have been stressing on the point that boys should stop taking dowry. Why not the girls stop giving dowry? I do agree with that point but then, I feel that it is easier to stop the practice from the boy's side. It is in some way analogous to the issue of bribery… if we want to stop bribery we can only think of not taking a bribe. Trying the other way – not giving a bribe – is not that much an easy approach. If a guy does not get dowry, it will be followed on during his son's marriage… and things would start changing.

If you are unmarried, when you plan for your marriage give this a thought and if you are married, think of this when you arrange your child's marriage. Let us strive to make the society better!

SMS...

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Wed, 05 Jul 2006 10:05:00 +0000

Sometime back I got this SMS...

U want and U get that is LUCK
U want and U wait that is TIME
U want and U compromise that is LIFE
U wait and U don't compromise that is SUCCESS!

So, try, try and try!

Women's Liberation

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Tue, 30 May 2006 08:55:00 +0000

If you ask me if women’s liberation has been achieved in India, I would say, "there is a long way to go". It might seem that I am exaggerating things. But, it is not so. People have a wrong notion about "women’s liberation". Many think that it is just about girls getting educated and going out to work. Isn’t liberation a thing related to the "mindset" rather than "external" things? Surely, you would immediately expect me to elaborate on what I mean by "mindset" and "external". Hope what follows – starting from the next paragraph will make it clear. Before you further proceed, you have to understand that whatever I write here is having the "majority" of the Indian [or Tamilnadu - in particular] women/girls in mind. There are always exceptions and I have met them myself. But they are one in a million or so.

Education is one of the first steps towards liberation. Yet girls do not take that seriously. If it is not so, why is it that just three girls were there in the top 100 in Engineering rank list in my batch? Is it that girls were not given good education or is it that they did not have talent? It is merely because girls still think that there is no actual need for them to get educated. There are very few girls who think beyond getting graduated.

"...still girls give dowry on marriage, don’t ask their husband to help them in the kitchen, resign their job after marriage, rarely go abroad for higher studies..."

In India, women (and men too) still believe that it is a man’s job to run a family. When it comes to marriage, people look at the "salary" of the boy [and if he works in the US, preference is given] and "beauty" of the girl. Rarely does a girl marry a boy who gets a pay less than her (The reason is obvious: A boy wants his wife to be less brilliant than him… and they obviously think that salary is a measure of brilliance though it is not so!). As my classmate Venkataprasad pointed out in one of his posts, most of the Indian marriages leave one of the couples to remain unsatisfied with their marriage. I believe it is just because Indians still see "salary" and "beauty" as the main factors for marriage. Further, still girls give dowry on marriage, don’t ask their husband to help them in the kitchen, resign their job after marriage, rarely go abroad for higher studies and so on. I have observed that except for those who work in software companies, mostly girls limit their communication to a very few outside their family circle. Now, after all this, how could I say that women are "liberated"?

Further, girls want to prove that they are equal to boys in all aspects and they think that that is what is meant by "liberation". I have many a time wondered if girls wear jeans, t-shirts and pants just to have a satisfaction that they are equal to men in all aspects. Though they claim that they wear it just for comfort, I suspect if it is true. The reason is that a jean is a dress that is uncomfortable for anyone in Indian environment. It will suit only people in cold countries. Often people when speaking on women’s liberation compare men and women. They show Mother Teresa, Marie Curie, Indira Gandhi, Arundhathi Roy, Kiran Bedi and several other women as examples. Firstly, I don’t see any point in comparing men and women. That has nothing to do with women’s liberation. Men and women have different capabilities. By comparing themselves with men, women are achieving things lesser than what they actually can! Secondly, till the time one can list the number of women who have been "liberated" it just means that there are a lot more who are not liberated.

Many a time, men hinder the progress of women. There was a group of girls – seniors – in my college. They used to do some programme every year at the cultural show. The first programme of theirs that I saw was creative and good. It was like a dance-drama [with no dialogues] and the theme was about women’s liberation. But, the boys of our so-called one of the top institutes of Tamilnadu did all that they could do to disturb the show. The reason – the programme was by girls and it was about "women’s liberation".

They want to have all the advantages of being a woman and yet they want to be liberated also.

Though men are in many cases responsible for women not getting liberated, women too are responsible for it. They want to have all the advantages of being a woman and yet they want to be liberated also. I was shocked when I came to know that there is 33% reservation for girls in engineering colleges in Andhra. Reservations in any form do not help in progress.Why did not the women’s organizations fight against that? Where were those organizations when 33% reservation was suggested for Parliament? Why did not they oppose the concession given for girls in paying tax? I have seen elderly people wait in a long queue at a railway reservation counter just because many college girls were using the queue meant for "women and senior citizens". They could have very well used the common queue. But they wanted to take advantage of being a "woman". Then how could they dream of "liberation"?

Finally, as I end this blog, here is what I want to tell to women and men. To women I tell, "If at all you want to have liberation, change yourselves – at heart. Realize that men are not your competition. The talents and capabilities bestowed upon you are different. Utilize your potential to the maximum and you will be liberated". To men I tell, "If at all you want to see more development in the world in all fields, women are to be liberated. If still you insist on not doing that, world will always remain 50 years behind what could have been achieved".

Phoenix

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Mon, 15 May 2006 10:41:00 +0000

Expect continuous posts from now onwards. Actually, when I started this blogspot, I wanted to use it as a means to quench my thirst for writing general articles. So, I took a long time to write in the way I wanted it to be. Generally I write only when I feel like writing i.e. when I have the mood to write. But, one of the viewers - Vasanth - pointed out that my posts are too long to read. It is true. Very few people will have patience to read till the last line of my articles. I know that myself but did not bother as I wanted only those few "real" readers who can have the patience to read till the end. But now I feel that my blogspot is not having any posts at all for a long time. So, I have decided to post short posts now and then. Anyhow, I will also post longer ones when I get the mood to write one... Have a nice time reading my blogs!

God - I

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Sat, 01 Oct 2005 16:05:00 +0000

It is when I was in 10th standard that I questioned myself what "God" means! This blog is just an outcome of my conversation with my inner-conscience, around 10 yrs back. I remember very well - I was going in my cycle when this question of "God" struck my mind. It was actually a series of questions... Does God really exist? If so, is God a "person" with extraordinary powers? And, where is God? Everywhere? Then, why does not God show Himself up to any of us? If God is so good, why does He let evil creep into the earth? Is God controlling the Universe? Is Universe a plaything for Him – some sort of sport? ...the list goes endless! And, when I found (after a lot of thinking over this issue) a satisfactory definition for "God" – something that could convince my conscience, I changed many things in my day-to-day life.".

As a student of science, I could not accept that God controls universe... or to put it in other words, I did not believe that God is someone who could drench you in rain when He wished.

When I began to think about what God really meant, my primary concern was to answer the question, "Does God really exist?" If the answer is "No" then I could stop at that point. But if the answer is "Yes", I have to justify it by giving a proper "definition" to the word "God". By "definition" I refer to explaining the basic questions 'Who, Where and How' is God? Now, this definition should also solve the endless list of questions that I had in my mind – atleast to a greater extent possible! As a student of science, I could not accept that God controls universe... or to put it in other words, I did not believe that God is someone who could drench you in rain when He wished. I believed that the mysteries of nature could be explained by science... after all with the development of science, it was already possible to forecast climate, study about stars and planets, make satellites circle the earth,... . If there was something that science could not explain, it just meant that science had not advanced that much to give an explanation. It cannot be termed as God’s act. But, even after having these thoughts, I still could not say that there did not exist any "God". The reason is that, there were many things that pointed to the "existence of God". For example, people could get their problems solved when they prayed to "God". Though I did not support the theory that God solved the problem, I could not despise the fact that prayer had some effect in getting solution to problems. So, I chose to "logically" believe that there existed "God". Having accepted the existence of God, I now had the uphill task of defining "God

When I started out to "define" God, I could rule out the possibility of God having a "physical" presence because if God had had "physical" form and was too good at heart, He would have done two things. Firstly, He would have shown up before some people atleast (who are good and believed in Him). Secondly, there is no reason why He should allow humans to do wrong things! Now, I began to think of what "God" could be! To arrive at some conclusion, I chose to think logically again. There was one clue towards getting the solution – "prayer helped in reaching God". Thinking on these lines, it also struck me that if someone concentrates on a particular thing, he/she is bound to get some solution for what he/she is thinking about. This I myself had experienced. Also, there were many incidents supporting this. So, I began to analyze if – God might be related to "thoughts". Finally – after a lot of for and against arguments (with my inner-conscience) on this assumption – I came out with final acceptable (to me!) definition of God that can be put forth as follows:

"God is a conglomeration of all the good thoughts let out by humans. There is also a collection of all bad thoughts – that we call it the "Satan". Both God and Satan will repay us in proportion to what we contribute to them. But it is to be kept in mind that God can repay us by good only and Satan by evil deeds only."

I could convince myself with the above definition as it answered majority of questions related to God (though there are still some unanswered questions!) in a satisfying manner. Now, I could say God existed everywhere as God is just "thoughts". No one has ever seen God, as "thoughts" have no physical presence. When people pray, they think of good things only and so they are being paid back with good deeds. And, when people pray, their problems get solved – not because there is someone watching them pray and provide solutions to them. It is just that, when they pray, they concentrate more towards their solution and also contribute some "good" thought. As a result, they get a clear mindset to think of a solution to their own problems. This might also be thought of as a "pay back" for their contribution to the "good thoughts". Actually, even after defining God as a "conglomeration of good thoughts", I wanted some strong support for my definition as it was just a child’s conclusion (considering my age at that time – 15 yrs) on a topic which can be analyzed in greater depth only by elder people who have more experience in life (However, I still believed in my conclusion!). The support I was looking for did come accidentally – when I joined my B.E in 1999.I came across the works of Swami Vivekananda and in that I could see to my astonishment every point which I had discussed to myself – but in a more refined way. He had written in one of his works, "all our minds are a part of the universal mind" which is what I call it the "conglomeration of thoughts". He had discussed the powers of the mind (thoughts) and about concentration. On reading his works, I began to have "high respect" for him. Though he followed Hinduism, he stressed on the oneness of all religions.

For those who know me, I tell you, "I am not an atheist. It is just that I have a different perception of God. I am a person who believes in science more than superstition; and believes in common sense more than science itself!"

As I already mentioned in the starting paragraph, I had to change many things after "defining" God. Having understood that "concentration" is the basis of prayer, I no longer liked going to temples on special occasions when there is a rush and "concentrating" becomes difficult. Also, I could not accept large amounts of money being spent on performing costly rituals in the name of "poojas" while there are millions of people starving. I began to believe strongly that "God" exists only if "people" exists, for "God" is just good thoughts. My stress is on improving the living condition of humans. My point is that it is enough if we maintained the existing places of worship and to divert the remaining money for the development of mankind. However people around me began to consider me as having "indifferent" attitude towards the "holy rituals" and they doubted if I am an atheist. Some have even asked me so! For those who know me, I tell you, "I am not an atheist. It is just that I have a different perception of God. I am a person who believes in science more than superstition; and believes in common sense more than science itself!" Actually there is still a lot I would like to write on this topic… without which my views on God is incomplete. However, I do not want to burden the readers with too much of my views. So, await God – II (might come up after a month or so!) where I will write how people are seeking God without knowing what "God" meant. Also, I will write why certain things needs to get changed for the betterment of the society! And, if you think – after reading this – that I am trying to bring up a new religion or that I am trying to make people follow Swami Vivekananda, I will prove your assertion to be wrong in God - II. Will meet you in God II!

Success

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Sun, 03 Jul 2005 09:40:00 +0000

Before you start reading, list down five to ten people whom you think are successful... Have you done it - atleast in your mind, if not in a paper? Now, see if they fall under any of these categories… scientists who changed the world, rich businessmen, well-known politicians/freedom fighters, sports persons, spiritual saints, peace-makers, cinema artists or famous writers. Are there people in your list whom you have been around with atleast during a part of your lifetime? If no, then I would say that you do not have a correct definition for success. Many of us think that money and fame is what success is all about and so our list of successful persons contains people who fall under one of the above mentioned categories. But success is not simply making money or becoming famous… and here are my views on success - in the following paragraphs.

I have many a time heard people talking about success and most of the time they come up with examples of people who are either rich or famous. And, one day I began to wonder is it all fame and money that decides success. Should I have to invent something new or built a million dollar industry to become successful? – was the question. After thinking about this deeply, I came to a conclusion that many of us don’t have a proper definition for success.

"We have an illusion that success is synonymous to money and fame. So, we miss out the ordinary – yet successful – people whom we meet daily."

Many a time when we think of success, we take examples of the rich and the famous – say, Bill Gates or Dhirubhai Ambani or Dr.Abdul Kalam. Now, have we ever met them? Most of us haven’t. But, we speak about them from what we have heard about them. I do not say that they are not successful. Also, I do not say that we should not get inspirations from them. But, I do believe that we should also look at people around us – people who are not rich and famous – but can be taken as examples to be followed; people whom we have been meeting daily, speaking with and are known to us. We have an illusion that success is synonymous to money and fame. So, we miss out the ordinary – yet successful – people whom we meet daily. Probably, some of us have thought in these lines… but even those who have done so are not ready to discuss it – fearing that the society might not agree with what they think.

If I were to explain what success is – in a single sentence – I would say,

“Given the set of constraints one has by birth (money, education, circumstances under which one is brought up) and given one’s interests/goals, if he/she is able to make the most of what is given to him/her - trying to reach his/her goal - then, he/she is successful in life.”

Here are some successful people I have come across in my life… these examples of people I give here should drive home my point…

After six years of passing out of school, still I make it a point to meet my teachers atleast once in a year. They had an interest in teaching. They considered teaching not as a job but more of a service. They are not rich. They are not known world-wide. Yet, given their circumstances and interest, they are successful. They didn’t build industries but they did make good humans.

And, then there was a person in my college mess - who worked as a server. When every other worker used to brood over the lower wages and worked with insincerity, he used to do his work with dedication. He used to serve the food just the way we serve food for relatives who pay a visit to our home. The instant he spots someone’s plate getting empty, he would be there asking if that student would like to have some more rice. There was something that people around him could learn from him – sincerity and dedication at work. Given his circumstances, I would say – he is successful in life.

Here is one final example to reiterate my point - my paternal grandfather. Though he has had very less of formal education, he educated his children and there is a lot one can learn from him – which no formal education can impart in you and me. How can I not say that he is successful?

"Life is like a game of chess. Just like every coin on the board is unique by its position and allowed movements, everyone of us are unique with respect to our talents. But the problem is that everyone of us wants to be the king or the queen (the rich and famous)."

Often people compare themselves with the famous personalities and the rich people and start to believe that they are not successful. Life is like a game of chess. Just like every coin on the board is unique by its position and allowed movements, everyone of us are unique with respect to our talents. But the problem is that everyone of us wants to be the king or the queen (the rich and famous). By wanting to be the king/queen, we forget our talents as a pawn or a bishop or a horse or a rook. Remember – just like the fact that a pawn, bishop, horse and the rook are indispensable for a game of chess, we need people of different talents in the game of life. Imagine a chessboard full of king/queen alone. It is what would happen if all humans were to be rich and famous. Don’t hesitate to be a pawn – if that is what your circumstances and interests dictate you to be. Think how you can make the best use of your talents. Be yourself and don’t ever compare yourself with anyone. You can learn from other’s lives but never should you want to be just like others. The day you start wanting to be others, you lose your identity and you are not towards success!

Now, you might have a question lingering in your mind. By what I have said till now, do I mean to say that everyone is successful as they are? Can we attribute everything to the circumstances/fate? No, certainly not. I just mean that we should have a clear definition for success and we should understand that success is not money/fame. Everyone of us should ask ourselves, “Am I successful?”. We should be true to ourselves when we answer to this question. If our conscience says that we are doing our best to reach our goals – given the circumstances under which we live, then, we are successful. If we think there is something more we can do – we have to try improving ourselves.

WISHING YOU SUCCESS!

Xpect It Soon!

noreply@blogger.com (akp) — Thu, 30 Jun 2005 10:53:00 +0000

Hi... Watch out this space for my views on different things that happen around us... This blogspot is to share my thoughts with everyone... May be some of my views are unacceptable to you... for views always differ. This blog is not for arriving at a conclusion over issues but merely a platform to put forward how I see things... That is why I have named it "Through My Glasses" and titled it "As I See It".

Due to time and other constraints, new posts will come up once in a month or so... So, you can check this link once in a month... if you like the posts. Also, I am not so good at writing... so don't have too much expectations... Hope you will have a nice read at this space...