Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

I seem to have a backlog of questions I hadn’t noticed about death and dying. My intention is to help you see that there is nothing to be frightened of. We have all died many times and here we are today.

From Tionna:

“This is so deep. I was crying. It’s scary to die and not know what’s going on and where we’re going to go next…but I hope me and my family go to paradise.”

(in response to: http://www.askyourangels.com/alive-after-life/where-where-do-you-go-when-you-die-7-options.)

Tionna, no matter what your life is like today, when you pass on, you will be given all the options, both positive and what you think of as negative. How you choose to live today is how you will live tomorrow, dead or alive. When you pass on, you take yourself with you. Your level of consciousness is how you decide how to live: with love or without, happy or sad.

In a body, there are opportunities each day, no matter how seemingly horrendous a situation is, to ask for guidance from God. You may remember, “Ask and you’ll receive.”  Based on your decision, and it is a decision, you can choose your life. Does it always work out filled with love and joy? Of course not. On the other hand, how you choose to respond makes a huge difference in what and how you receive life.

The same is true in death.  Most of us don’t want to die, but we do anyway. There is nothing to be worried about. You do the best you can. We all make mistakes. We all mess up. However, your level of consciousness, Tionna, will not let you do tortuous things to another. And so you won’t. You will make mistakes that you might very well be sorry for but you return to your normal goodness.

Learning to forgive yourself and others leads to peace of mind and an everyday smoothness that enables you to live what life spews out relatively unscathed, even when the apparent worst happens.

In death, you are given the opportunity to move into the Light. Just intend to step into it and you’ll be fine. If you “miss the bus” so to speak, be open to looking again and it will appear.  Those you know will appear to usher you into what you call paradise. It’s a happy occasion and not frightening.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Angels,

I have made some terrible mistakes in my life and feel crippled by guilt for them.  I desperately need guidance to get over these mistakes and create the happy life my wife and children deserve. Please help me.”  Mark, London, UK

Dear Mark,

There is not a human being alive, if they are honest with themselves, who has not had variations of this thought.

No matter what happened in the past that has created this remorse, what you can do is begin again, today. Make amends to those you hurt. Apologize. Ask for their forgiveness and if you are still involved with these behaviors that you think are so odious, then either go for counseling to help you let go or join AA to back up your intention with real hard core inner work (it’s free.)  You are ready to move forward, to create a change, now.

Your mind is creating havoc with your life.  It’s thrashing you, reminding you of all your perceived misdeeds from the past, and your projected screw-ups into the future that leave you flailing about in the present. The answer is to look at yourself as if your best friend was talking to you.

It is only through facing your “misdeeds” head on that you will be able to detach yourself enough to make changes.  You have been holding yourself way too tightly for too long. You still have a drive. Use it to be the man that you really are. The guy that other people like and want to trust.

The ego-mind always wants to be in control. The only real answer is to let go of your control. To realize when you listened inside before, you heard only the squawking of your ego. The problem is you are trusting the wrong part of you. Instead, if you partner with your Inner Guidance and trust that that Still Small Voice speaks the truth, you will be able to pull yourself together to begin again. 

One more … You must face that you have been holding on so tightly to your emotions for fear of losing control, that the exact opposite has happened. You have no control. You must learn to share the real you by allowing yourself to break down. You are locked tightly in the prison of your own mind.  Without allowing the dam to break, you might break first.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

There have been so many comments on this blog that I haven’t had time to answer. I will focus here for awhile to see if I can assuage your joint fears. Please remember that that I am answering through my Angels’ guidance; left on my own, I don’t know any more than you.

From Anna, Nelson, NZ
“The question I have is when a spirit/soul sticks around near earth perhaps due to unfinished business….how does the essence of that being retain their human personality?

“When things have been channeled through from my dad, he is very much sounding like my dad, and not a soul/spirit accessing source (or maybe it’s both but he is relating to me in a way he thinks I will relate?). So why is the human personality retained after death? Is it that they are not ready to let go and hold onto that? Or does spirit individuate into personalities anyway?”

Anna’s Angels answer:

When someone passes on, in this case Anna’s dad, he has moved into the Light but continues to “watch over her.” They seemed to have a deeply loving connection. That connection does not disappear at death.  It is natural for him to relate to her in a way she can recognize as him, otherwise she would think that I, as a Medium, was making it all up. I remember her laughing. She was reassured that her dad was very much with her.

The personality of our deceased is how we identify him/her in our physical environment.  It is my experience, that the personality that we knew gradually disappears. My mom, who was at odds with me most of her life, began to appear in my dreams a year or two ago. The 30 years before that, she wouldn’t look at me. I would see her and beg her to to interact with me, but she ignored me.

What I think happened is that after 30 plus years of living minus a body, she has finally released her old judgment of me. We are now loving friends, the same friends we were in life when she was “in the mood.”

As for Anna’s question, “…does spirit individuate into personalities anyway?”  This is a fascinating thought. What I’m hearing is yes and no.  There are parts of all of us that appear when we are with one person and not another, in one situation but not another. 

Those in spirit can manifest different parts of themselves from their old personality initially. Those who are dead but not in the Light, whom we call ghosts, retain their old persona until they choose to let go of their judgment and forgive themselves and others. 

In the place of Unconditional Love, the God-Light, what Anna calls “spirit,” you return to Source until you choose to reincarnate. What I’m hearing is these spirits can try out new behaviors, because they are not judged. However, your level of consciousness never moves backwards; i.e., a “good” person in a body would not choose to be a murderer. 

The process begins again with birth into a different body. We forget the feeling of unconditional love when the world surrounds us. It is the remembrance that makes life worth living.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Angels,

“What is my life (career) purpose?  I know I want to work for myself and I am just really confused. I am having a very difficult time getting clear answers on this subject. Maryann, Yachats, OR

Dear Maryann,

Oh my gosh, Maryann, you have been through “it!”  Something has happened in your life, maybe your mate leaving, or threatening you, that has left you hanging emotionally by your fingernails.  This is a place of transformation and it’s important to look at it this way.  Most of us don’t make scary changes in our lives until something knocks us out of our comfort level, even if that level was not so high before. 

You are worried, terrified perhaps, to step up and into bigger shoes. You’re feeling as if you have been taken advantage of when you were doing your best to make your situation better.  Your Angels are saying to be careful to take threats from others seriously and get out of harm’s way.

Your challenge is to understand that nothing in life is stable.  We are made of energy and energy changes. The trick is to ride the wave and not resist. To understand that life presents us with opportunities which feel like anything but. It is time to ride the wave in terms of working for yourself. To think about how you want to feel in your life. What do you want, and then set your intention to create it.

Your Angels’ purpose is not to tell you what to do, but rather to support you in the doing. When you ask and don’t seem to receive an answer, what’s really happening is one of three things:

1.  The time is not right to step forward to begin something new.  It is time to allow yourself to balance in whatever way you can and continue asking.

2.  You are asking but too scattered to listen. My suggestion is that you do something that relaxes you.  Sitting numb for hours in front of the TV doesn’t count.  Asking from a place of desperation doesn’t produce results. Believe me when I say, I know how this one works.

3.  It is time to let go and let God. The idea is to focus on how you want to feel in your perfect job. Imagine yourself working alone. Where are you?  What are your gifts? What is your training? See yourself happily fulfilled even if you have no inkling of what to do. 

We all have to learn to give up our control in order to be able to take it back.

If we are living in a perpetual tug of war with the Universe, we makes ourselves nuts. You seem to have issues that are not work-related, but emotionally threatening. Notice if you feel compromised. As if you have been ignoring your own wishes to please someone else, perhaps for so long that no longer do you know what makes you happy. Your normal boundaries seems splintered.

You are a sweet woman who seems to have lost herself temporarily. You have to find her first, perhaps by spending time looking at you. Don’t be afraid. You don’t have to share. If you are feeling like you are being judged constantly, it might be time to get some help psychologically.  Or even through AlAnon or AA, where for a couple of bucks you can listen to others share their similar issues. There is no finger pointing. No judgment. Just support. When you are ready, you talk. When you are not, that’s fine as well.

You deserve to share your kindness with you. You think you can fix others but now you have the opportunity of fixing yourself. No one can do that for you because you must honor yourself first or you will go into “replay” automatically.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Hearing from the other side can be a bit unsettling until you figure out what, if anything, needs to be done.

“I am 16 years old and believe I have the gift of communicating with spirits.  What I would like to know is how can I improve this as I am unsure about my abilities’ strength.  I sometimes have the same dream more than once and on occasion, there has been someone asking for help.

I just need some advice.”  Jessie

Hi Jessie,

Thanks for asking.  You are doing the right thing in asking for help before you are unable to sleep at night from so many knocking at your dream door.  Like most things in life, you need to figure out what is acceptable to you. Is it okay for you to be bombarded in your sleep with those who have passed on? Don’t you need your rest too? Might it be useful for you to set up some guidelines to what is allowable and what is not?

Here are my suggestions which come from me personally, and from various teachers looking to lend an emotional hand.

First of all, realize that you are already open to receiving or you would not be “getting” information. The question now is, what do you want to do with it? How much time do you want to attend to the needs of those who want to pass into the Light, because believe me, you must learn to set boundaries or you won’t finish high school without bags under your eyes from lack of sleep.

My suggestions follow:

1. I have no idea what part of the country you live in, but in San Diego, I have found a wonderfully encouraging and inexpensive teacher/moderator through MeetUp.com under the “Psychic Gym.” It is useful to sit in a group of like-minded people who receive information from the spirit world, but only if it is a non-judgmental atmosphere. We all “see” a little differently. Personally I tend to hear first. Others see. Sometimes I feel. We’ve even smelled smoke.

2. Teacher or no teacher, the first thing to do today is to set up a protocol for yourself. Whether spirits are approaching you all day or just in sleep, you must set up the rules that work for you or you will be besieged. It’s as if there is a miner’s light on your head that shows those who have not walked into The Light for one reason or another, that you are available.

“Cool,” you might say until you can no longer sleep through the night. On the other side, the spirits do not deal with what we think of as everyday life. Remember there is no time in the Afterlife; therefore, they have no understanding that you need your 7 or 8 hours to pass your math test and make your English teacher smile as well. Time and space are constructs of our planet.

My suggestion is that you follow your religious beliefs and pray by asking for protection. Or if you are a “I can do it myself” kind of person, like me, I set up my own protocol. I deliberately connect with my angels, my High Self, the Christ Consciousness and God Her/Him/Itself.  I ask to see what needs to be seen for the Highest Good of all concerned. If I am doing this before sleep, I deliberately ask for protection from the angels as well as reminding them that I need to sleep. I am available for counseling ONLY for a specific amount of time, and state what that is. 

I have found that if I don’t set up a specific time, I can be bombarded with ghost energy, or those who have not moved into The Light, 24 hours a day. I don’t want that and if you want to graduate, most likely you won’t either.

3. It is a great gift that you are already moving the deceased into the Light. There are lots of reasons the dying don’t automatically move into the Light:

4.  Jessie, my suggestion is all of the above, plus know that if you choose, and it appears that you do, that this is a beautiful calling. Many need your help. You will improve simply by practice. The more you dapple in the spirit world, the better you will become.  It will be important for you to maintain your grounding as well. If you are not involved in sports, you might adding some physical activity. Your physical body needs to be strong to handle the emotional pull of those needing assistance.

5.  Understand that practice never makes perfect, but if you maintain your connection to the God Source and pray for guidance for the Highest Good of all concerned, it will all get easier. And do remember, that the wisdom comes through you. It is not of you. You are simply the conduit for the energy of the Divine.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

A young woman’s fiance, Dirk,  was stabbed on her 30th birthday three years ago. The two of them had had a fight and she walked out, only to find out afterward from her Dad that her boyfriend was dead.

She’s having trouble releasing him. “He was my world and now I’m lost. I know I feel him or I think it’s him.  My mom was also murdered when I was 9.  I guess I just want to know they are okay and if there are any messages for me.  I need to find a way to accept their deaths.”

This is way too much for most of us to handle. Your angels want to point out that you are the one left here while they took off because you are the strongest.  You are the one who can surmount these challenges and perhaps, even help others as they go through similar losses.  You are more powerful than you realize or this backward “opportunity” would not be coming your way. 

As you master this for yourself over time, you will be able to help others recover as well. The wisdom that is and will continue to come to you as you allow yourself to love and mourn and move on, can be of great service to others undergoing similar losses, whether murder or dependencies.

Your angels are saying that it is time to heal your heart. To stop worrying about how or why these horrific things happened. They just did and it is not your fault no matter what you think today.  Now is a time for you to move forward slowly in your life. Perhaps your boyfriend was a little hot-headed and aggravated a situation when he should have walked away.

As for you, notice that you are beginning to come into a more disciplined life. You are better balanced. If you were doing drugs, you are beginning to exhibit self-control. Perhaps you are managing your emotions better than before.

Dirk is opening up to a different way of living than what he knew when he was your boyfriend. He is living in a more openhearted, loving way. He is learning the lesson of allowing as opposed to pushing. He still loves you and will continue to do so but wants to encourage you to move forward in your own life, to love again, and to make the best of a rough start.

Your mom is a little different. She seems not to have moved into the Light.  She was afraid of being judged because she didn’t realize that she was the one doing the judging, not the Divine. When we don’t feel deserving, we imagine we will be shunted into the basement when the penthouse is available for the asking. If you choose, you can help your mom by forgiving her, even if it is for leaving you when you were only nine.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Angels,

“Is my future life and love to be physically together with Jerry soon?”  Kari, St. Paul, MN

Dear Kari,

The challenge for you is that you are seeing yourself as if you are still a powerless little kid who can’t make anything happen. You’re feeling trapped, held captive by your thoughts.  It is your work for this lifetime to accept that there is no longer anyone holding you back except you. You can create the life you want but you have to be courageous enough to open your emotional gates and step through. Take a chance. Trust that you have so much more to offer than what you believe about yourself.

Your challenge is to stop comparing yourself to every one else, although we all do. There is nothing holding you back from creating a happy relationship and future but your inner picture of who you are. You are like the horse always at the gate who never runs the track.

Your angels are suggesting that you begin in a small way.  Put Jerry to the side in your mind for awhile and work on you. Create each day where you begin to take back some small part of you and your life.  You have given your true self away and therefore are not able to create good things, including a lasting relationship.  In losing yourself, you have lost your emotional balance.

Begin to let go. To trust in the Divine within. And to step out, one baby step at a time. When we rehash what we think of as our fatal mistakes, and when we feel guilty for not being what we think we are supposed to be, we get to a place where we are so busy punishing our self, that we unable to create a positive life today.

It is time to release your past by realizing that the judgment of others comes from their own self-doubt and guilt. It is not who you are. You are hiding your inner beauty by repeatedly punishing yourself. It is time to let go and move on, whether it’s with Jerry or someone else.

“I am looking for my soul mate lady.  I’m 44. Still single. When can I expect to get one?”  Jayant, New Delhi, IN

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Jayant,

Sometimes people ask about a partner but there are too many distractions for them to notice when someone shows up. You do not seem to be this way. Your intention is clear. The good news is that you are learning to love and respect yourself.  In doing this,  you make it easier for another to love you.  You have learned to be comfortable in your own body. You know who you are and what you require to be happy.

You are changing and ready to begin a new stage of your life.  You have spent enough time “on the mountain,” enough time preparing, and are ready not only to ask for what you want but also to receive it.  With your eyes open, you will find your mate.

Life always seems to have a “but.” The but is that you no longer want to be alone yet you must trust as you walk your path, that you are being guided.  A relationship has either come for you already or will shortly. It is one where the two of you are aligned in the Light together yet each of you is following your heart, but perhaps on a slightly different path. 

If you allow it, this can be a beautiful relationship where you can each be yourself, a match of loving with a minimum of controlling.

Master this and you’ve got it!  If it all seems too good to be true, it can be because in the past you thought you had found the right one but she was unable to manage her emotions in a way that supported her or you.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Angels,

“How may I serve myself with love?” Roxanne, SA

Dear Roxanne,

Interesting question from an interesting person. You seem to be having a problem common to many spiritually open people. How do you integrate your age-old knowledge into your everyday life? 

At the same time, you are dealing with personal issues that you have yet to master. You have been given the gift, although it doesn’t seem like it currently, of learning to stand up for yourself. This seems to be a life issue for many women, myself included.  Our fear of self-assertion can knock us off our feet, when if we only saw “it” coming… but we didn’t, because we were afraid to look. If we don’t look, then we can fool ourselves into pretending that we didn’t do anything. It is not our problem. If we just stay out of the way, then we’ll be okay.

This is not the answer to loving yourself. The answer for the heart-centered is to accept that keeping your boundaries is a life-long issue for you. 

Perhaps it is difficult to see you are a natural leader because of your integrity of spirit. You have ethics. You care about people.  As you allow yourself to step forward, to hold your ground when you know you are in your heart, then others will follow. 

You have the heart of an artist. In allowing yourself to practice your natural inclinations, you will express what others are not aware of within themselves;  or if they are, you will express the heart of you, your love, through your work, whether is is gardening or painting. 

The Divine wants to speak through your hands, your heart and your vision.  In loving the part of you that is your true core,  not only will you be expressing love for yourself, but for all of humanity, whether it is exhibited through a 3 ft garden plot or clay sculpted into a blob that only you can decipher or sharing your love with a lonely child.

Serving yourself a good dollop of love comes from sharing the true you hidden underneath your lovely exterior.

Courtesy Ramsiel, Love&LightWorld

Dear Angels,

“Will I ever feel permanently safe and satisfied with life, ever?”  Michelle, Ontario, CAN

Dear Michelle,

No wonder you are writing. You are in a difficult place, but not without hope. 

The everyday, “Oh this again…” of life is getting to you.  Notice if you wanted  something so badly, you thought your life would come to a halt without it.  As you pointed out in your question, when you got what you thought you wanted, you were still not  happy.

You hold a picture of yourself as someone very powerful.  This someone is you in another life. You were the healer, the one who could mix healing potions both emotionally and physically.   There is a memory of your power that still hangs on for you.  What you have yet to learn is that this power came not from you, but from the Divine through you.  You were the conduit.

Instead you have used your power in this lifetime to take what you want, perhaps without consideration of others.  Be honest with yourself and face that you might very well have a substantial problem with alcohol or other addictive behavior.

If your relationships have fallen apart, you tend to be depressed, and the best part of your day begins after you begin drinking, my suggestion is you give AA a try.  Fabulous people emerge from AA backgrounds but it is not for the weak of heart. It takes guts to admit, “I’m so messed up I am willing to do something about it. ” Why would you do that? Because in your heart of hearts, you want a different life AND you deserve it.