In Estes Park, Colorado, there is a river walk that includes a tunnel. The entrance and exit of this tunnel are lined with ceramic tiles decorated by local school children.  This one is particularly amusing:

Click for full version

As you can see, the kid in the middle just wants ‘Whirled Peas’.

~P

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Random Thoughts for Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

/begin Random Thoughts

The Supernatural Favorite Quotes Of Dean Winchester Edition

Dean Winchester:

“Well, if it’s isn’t the Ghost of  Christmas Screw You.”

“You stink like sex.”

“Snow White? Ah, I saw that movie. Oh, the porn version anyway.”

“What do you want me to do, Sam, huh? Sit around all day writing sad poems about how I’m going to die? You know what, I’ve got one. Let’s see, what rhymes with “Shut up, Sam”?”

“Every complaint called in this week about anything big, black or doglike. There’s 19 calls in all. And, uh, I don’t know what this is.” “You mean Carly’s MySpace address?” “Yeah, MySpace, what the hell is that? Seriously, is that like some sort of porn site?”

“I’m gonna go stop the big bad wolf. Which is the weirdest thing I’ve ever said.”

“It’s like we got a contract on us. You think it’s ’cause we’re so awesome? I think it’s ’cause it’s we’re so awesome.”

“House rules Sammy. Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole.”

“Sammy, wherever you are, Mom is a babe. I’m going to Hell. Again.”

“That fabric softener teddy bear… Oh want to hunt that little bitch down.”

“Look at me, I came back from the furnace without any of my old scars, right?  You know bullet wounds, knife cuts, none of the off angled fingers from all the breaks, I mean my hide is as smooth as a baby bottom, which leads me to conclude, sadly,… that my virginity is intact.”

“Oh, I’m sure he has, its just your standard haunted campus, alien abduction, alligator in a sewer gig.”

“Is that Gandhi?” “Yeah.” “Dude is squirrely.”

“Dude, I full on Swayze-d that mother.”

“Dear Castiel, who art maybe running his ass away from Heaven, we pray that you have your ears on. Breaker… breaker.”

“They were grabby incandescent douche bags.”

“Holy! UFO! UFO!” “Whoah, dude, stop yelling. I didn’t catch that last part.” “Close encounter! Close encounter!” “Close encounter? What kind, first, second?” “They’re after me!” “Third kind already? You better run man. I think the third kind’s a butt thing.” “Empathy, Sam! Empathy!”

/end random thoughts

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Me: *goes to bed*

Shadow the Cat: *hops up onto the bed, walks to the far corner, meows. Walks up the side of the bed to the other corner, digs around a little, meows, sits down.*

Me: *rolls over*

Shadow: *Walks to the foot of the bed, meows, hops over my feet, stares at the bathroom door. Walks up my legs to my hip, sits down.*

Me: Seriously?

Shadow: *Reaches one paw out, touches the blanket, tests it. Steps down, does a circle, pauses, stares at me, walks to the head of the bed and looks between the mattress and the headboard, meows.  Returns to the spot he tested, does a circle, pauses, does another circle, pauses, looks at the wall, another circle, curls up into a tight ball*

Me: Every freaking night?  Really?

Shadow: I’m patrolling! I keep you safe from blanket monsters!

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Well, I took a break.

Sort of.

Closing in on the end of the Cold as Ice manuscript, two things occurred to me; 1) there was no way in hell I could pull it together under 95,000 words and 2) my original plan for the end wasn’t going to work.

This caused me to stop my momentum and think.  Think about how I could rework the end I had in my head with the direction I have taken the manuscript in these last few weeks.  See, I’d actually written an outline for this novel, which is new for me.  The changes an agent brings.  Anyway, I had this outline and, for a bit, I stuck to it.  But I realized that the ending in that outline was easily 50,000 words and I was already at roughly 92,000 words.  A new ending had to be worked out.

Brent Weeks actually gave me some advice about the outline when I created it in the first place – You won’t be held to it!  I took that to heart this week.

So rather than push forward, I went back.  Back through the manuscript, fixing little things, adding a word here, changing another one there.  Found a couple of things I setup and never followed through on (marked those and fixed em this weekend).  Hit maybe 300 words Wednesday, Thursday and Friday nights.

Saturday morning I got up and did my reading for writers group early, then sat down to write.  Didn’t know what, only that I needed to write something.

This is where random thoughts comes in handy.  I decided to do something completely different.

And it worked.

2200 words later (I forgot to screenshot my progress Saturday, so that’s Sunday’s count) and I’m well into the end, over my 95,000 word goal and feeling really good about it all.

The end is nigh.

~P

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If you’re a writer who likes to outline, Scrivener has a cool feature you might be interested in.

Here’s a simple Scrivener Project that I’ve created:

Click for a full view

Notice I’m in Corkboard View/Mode with a Chapter Folder selected.  This means that the SubDocuments, called Scrivenings, are each represented by Index Cards.  On those cards, I’ve written a quick synopsis for each Scene.

When I select the first Scene in my Binder, I can start writing – but note that the Synopsis is still visible now in the right sidebar – also called the Inspector:

Click for a full view

I can also add to the synopsis right there in the Inspector:

Click for a full view

And if I select the Chapter Folder and the Corkboard View again, those changes are now on the Index Card:

Click for a full view

More Scrivener Tips coming!

Don’t have Scrivener?  You can try it free here (no, I don’t get paid for pointing you at them!).

~P

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Click for the full version

No, sorry – that’s not Treebeard.  What that is, I can’t say.  Other than weird.  Pucker up?

I snapped this photo at a tourist attraction in Manitou Springs, Colorado – the Cliff Dwellings.  Cool place.  Weird tree.

The sign hanging from it reads as:

Click for full version

The Ponderosa Pine!

…with Mister Potato Head features…

~P

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Random Thoughts for Thursday, January 26th, 2012

/begin random thoughts

I went and got a haircut this week. I was overdue.  The lady said, “I see in your notes that you like a scissor clip.” (wait – they have notes on me?  So, the friggin hair cut place HAS NOTES ON ME?  DOES EVERYONE HAVE NOTES NOW?)

“Welcome to Olive Garden! Oh, I see you’re a shitty tipper.  We’ll be seating you by the kitchen door tonight.” “Wait, what?  I TIP 18%!  SOMETIMES 20!  I SWEAR!”

* * *

Tips are earned.  People in food service work their butts off – I was one of them.  So I reward good service.  I also can be a bastard when I don’t get it…

* * *

*Fresno, CA. The 90′s.  DiCiccio’s Italian Restaurant*

Me: I can’t believe we’ve been sitting here with empty glasses for so long.

Friend: Oh, no!  You’re not going to say somethig, are you?  DO NOT SAY ANYTHING! I DON’T WANT THESE FRIGGIN PEOPLE SPITTING IN MY FOOD!

Me: >_>

* * *

Because I’ve been working on the book exclusively, and it’s a 1st draft, I have nothing to take to writers group this week.  This makes me sad.

* * *

“…and Tebow has the ball, he’s scrambling in the pocket, he’s throwing, OH! Interception!  Wait… wait… there’s a bright white light shining down from the sky, it’s enveloping Tebow!  Yes, the light has completely surrounded him!  He’s rising up off the ground!  Now he is shooting up into the heavens!  Proof that God exists!  Proof that God exists!”

*onboard the alien spacecraft*

“…probe the hell out of this guy.  I lost $50 cuz he can’t throw worth a damn.”

* * *

I often wonder if a barrier to my working out at a gym might be some repressed high school trauma.

* * *

“…and this is the weight room.”

“Wow!  Pretty cool!  What’s that?”

“Dead rat.”

“AAIIIEEE!”

“…did you just scream like a little girl?”

“…no?”

* * *

(there wasn’t really a dead rat)

* * *

2 years of pulling Coach Herzog, the CROSS COUNTRY COACH, for P.E. might have something to do with it.

* * *

“Okay, boys, today we are going to run.”

*loud groans*

“The more you groan, the more you run.  Once around the school, please.”

* * *

In HS, I took a computer programming class.  We were working on TRS-80′s (TRASH EIGHTIES!) and had to create a custom animation (monochrome, low resolution by today’s standards).  People did things like a football going through the goal posts, cars racing down a road.

I had a dog walk up and take a piss on a fire hydrant.

So.

Yeah.

/end random thoughts

~p

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Ever find yourself stuck because you need a name for a character?  Happens to me all the time.  Different people handle this in different ways.  I know writers who keep baby name books on their desk as a reference, or baby name websites bookmarked for the same reason.

As cool and useful as those options are, it would be nice to have something integrated into your writing app, right?

Scrivener’s answer to this is the Name Generator:

Click for a full view

Located on the Edit Menu under Writing Tools, the Name Generator has a lot of options:

Click for a full view

Male, Female or either is your first option.  Scrolling down, you can see you have loads of different kinds of names to choose from too, including: German, Hindi, Italian, Japanese, Polish, British, American and Spanish, to name just a few.  Make your selections and then set how many names you would like generated:

Click for a full view

Very useful when you need to get the brain juices flowing to find a name.

More Scrivener Tips coming!

Don’t have Scrivener?  You can try it free here (no, I don’t get paid for pointing you at them!).

~P

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My writers group has been passing emails back and forth today re: Apple’s new iBook EULA.  I know this is also a hot topic across the ‘Net today, so I wanted to share with everyone what I sent to the writers group.

–

I would put forth that EULA’s are, for the most part, universally bad for the end user and intended solely to benefit and cover the ass of the service provider – no matter who that provider might be.  They are also a contract not unlike any other contract you might encounter in your life, albeit one that 99% of us never bother to read.  We check the box to continue and move forward.  (South Park did a particularly gross episode on this very subject)

A plain English breakdown of the Microsoft Windows EULA, posted online by a lawyer, explained that by installing Windows on a computer, you agree that you have no expectations whatsoever that the software will wok, run, or be compatible with the hardware in your computer or any other software you might have or install, or with any peripheral equipment you might have such as printers, monitors, scanners, etc.  Anything that the software does outside of that is considered an ‘unexpected benefit’ of the software.

In other words – if it works, good for you. If it doesn’t, oh well – you can’t hold MS accountable for it because it was never intended to ‘work’ in the first place.

The Apple EULA’s have been criticized quite a bit for iTunes, iPod, iPhone, iPad, etc and so on – and in a lot of those cases, the criticism is justified.  But we click ‘accept’ anyway.

DropBox, a popular online cloud storage solution, used quite a bit by writers and content creators because they developed seamless integration/backup for wireless devices, laptops and smart phones, last year changed their EULA to state that by using their service, you agree that they own all content uploaded to their servers.  Essentially, this meant that if you wrote a book, and you used DropBox to store a copy of that book digitally, you released the rights to that material over to DropBox including copyright.

This was heavily criticized on the Internet and DropBox saw a massive reduction in its userbase, prompting a change in the EULA’s wording.  Many authors still avoid this service.

Amazon’s EULA’s have also been heavily criticized for, among other things, giving Amazon the right to remove content from your Kindle if they want to or are pressured to by a copyright holder.  They don’t even have to tell you they’re doing it.  There is also a provision on each individual download/purchase of a Kindle eBook stating how many times that book may be downloaded to your device per purchase.  What this means is that some people found that books purchased for Kindle 1 could not be downloaded to their shiny, brand spanking new Kindle 2′s because the publisher had a download limit associated with the eBook.  It’s in the fine print.  No one knew this and there has been a lot of outrage over it, but Amazon has not changed the EULA.

Have a website hosted on one of those $4.95/mo discount web hosting companies?  Ever read the EULA?

When you signed up for web hosting, you agreed to their terms of service (EULA) which includes things like:

• You agree not to engage in unacceptable use of any of (Web Hosts) products and/or services
• It is a violation for anyone to employ posts or programs which consume excessive CPU time or storage space
• You are responsible for ensuring that there is no excessive overloading of (Web Hosts) DNS system or servers
• You agree to follow generally accepted rules of “Netiquette” when sending e-mail messages or posting to newsgroups
• You affirm that you are not a spammer
• You affirm that you will not host or distribute any material that, to a reasonable person may be abusive, obscene, pornographic, defamatory, harassing, grossly offensive, vulgar, threatening or malicious;
• You affirm that you will not host, distribute, disseminate or transmit files, graphics, software or other material, data or work that actually or potentially infringes the copyright, trademark, patent, trade secret or other intellectual property right of any person
• If You elect to sell or resell advertising or web space to a third party then You will be responsible for the contents of that advertising and the actions of that third party (and you affirm it won’t be porn)
• In the event that You exceed Your allotted bandwidth and thereby overload (Web Hosts) DNS or servers, You shall be assessed any and all fees, costs and penalties associated with such overloading

Lastly, have you ever seen some of the things publishers try to slip into their version of a EULA?  (book contract)  Non compete clauses (if you write an epic fantasy for me, you agree not to write one for someone else until after our series is complete), character locks (you write this character for us and we have first rights and refusal rights on any other stories involving this character so you can’t write other books with other publishers after our contract is up).

How about this one: Upon termination of the Contract, the Publisher retains the right to sell or dispose of any media format, of inventory. The Author will receive applicable or adjusted royalties on these copies, and the rights not used by the Publisher, will revert to Author for the manuscript, but not for the cover art. The Publisher will have an inventory amounting to 1000 copies per any media format at termination of Contract. Rights for the book will stay with the Publisher, until all copies are exhausted. This is any media format…e-book, print, pod, audio, etc., which the book is published. All media formats are considered published and in inventory, when they go up for sale.

Writer’s beware explains: This puts a unique spin on a publisher’s traditional right to dispose of unsold inventory when a book is taken out of print or a contract term ends, either by selling the inventory through traditional sales channels (and paying a royalty on those sales) or remaindering (in which case, usually, no royalty is due). The publisher can’t produce more inventory, it can only sell off what it has on hand; and “inventory” is understood to mean “physical inventory”–i.e., not ebooks, which should be removed from sales channels immediately (though it usually takes a little while for vendors to comply). Moreover, the fact that the publisher is allowed to try and recoup some of its expense for unsold product does not delay rights reversion, or indeed, affect reversion at all.

With this publisher, however, termination triggers a refill at the inventory pump. Whatever the publisher may have on hand (and ebooks are never really “on hand”), termination causes inventory to magically shoot up to 1,000. Worse, it delays the reversion of rights, making reversion contingent on all inventory being sold, down to the last book. Suppose your book was available from this publisher as an ebook and a POD print edition; just imagine how long it might take a small publisher to sell 1,000 copies of each format.

In effect, termination isn’t really termination–it’s an indefinite extension of your original grant of rights, rendering the official 3-year contract term moot. And–talk about a Catch-22–because the contract has officially terminated, you’re no longer covered by its guarantees and protections. Is this even legally enforceable? Perhaps a lawyer or two will weigh in.

Plus, you’d have to trust the publisher’s accounting. This particular contract does include an audit clause–but with the contract terminated, the publisher could argue that your right to audit had terminated too.
—

SO – What the hell is this all about, P?

• All EULA’s are in place to benefit the service provider, not the end user
• All EULA’s pretty much screw you, the consumer
• Always read a EULA (or attempt to read it) before you click that little accept button – if something bothers you, don’t click it.  You can actually do that, btw – there are other places/websites/service providers/vendors/publishers out there
• Realize that services providers like Amazon & Apple are out to be the only game in town (they don’t exactly hide this fact any more than Microsoft does), so they release tools like this one to make it easy for content publishers to use their systems, but almost ALWAYS have a gotcha hidden somewhere in the agreements.  I believe Amazon’s CreateSpace has exclusivity clauses in some of their agreements.
• If it looks too good to be true, it probably is
• Nothing is ever ‘free’
• Money should always flow towards the Writer/Content Creator (not away) (whole other subject) (probably) (ie Never use Publish America or any other service that wants upfront money from you)

~P

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This photo was taken with the same point and click camera I mentioned in last week’s Photo Friday.

In this case, I was further south near Colorado Springs.  Yes, I was on a mountain, and I was looking down from a decent overhang when I decided to snap this shot.

Click to view the full image

I keep trying to take this shots, but they don’t give the right sense of scale that I’m looking for.  I still like it, though.

~P

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