From the Files - Articles on Dealing with Eldercare Stress

Eldercare Lessons: Quality of Life - Rudy's Story

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 14:00:00 GMT

By Rita M Files

Throughout the years of working in the elder care industry, I have had the good fortune to meet a handful of people who have positively impacted my life on both a personal and professional level. The lessons I learned from them have changed my view on my own "golden" years and the true meaning of the quality of life.

One person who stands out the most is my beloved Rudy. He and his longtime companion, Helena�after spending the previous 40 years living in an apartment in New York City in a neighborhood laden with crime and danger�reluctantly agreed to move to a senior living community after much pressure from both their families. Their home had become a virtual prison, complete with bars on their first-floor apartment windows and multiple locks on the door. Neither Rudy nor Helena had been able to leave their home unescorted for several years.

My first encounter with them was the day they moved to the senior living community where I was working at the time. Quiet and sullen, they both appeared frightened, tired, and resigned to living in "a place like this." Helena, noticeably the younger of the two, seemed to take the lead. Rudy appeared to be a shell of a man as he held his partner's hand tightly and shuffled along through the tour of their new home.

As we approached the main resident gathering area, also known to most as the 'piano room," I was somewhat relieved that our tour would end here. As we entered, Rudy suddenly stopped and gazed for several minutes at the beautiful white grand piano that was the focal point of the room. Seeing what I believed to be a sparkle in his eyes, I asked, "Do you play?" He responded "my whole life." Seizing the moment, I asked Rudy if he would play a song for me, and he readily agreed. As he approached the piano, he asked what I would like to hear, and my request was "Some Enchanted Evening."

As he sat on the bench and lifted the keyboard cover, he transformed before my eyes. Head high, shoulders back, he began one of the most beautiful renditions of the song I had ever heard. As the glorious music filled the community, Rudy drew quite a crowd that day and every day thereafter for the entire eight months he lived with us. He passed away in his sleep one night. Finding a list of songs next to his bedside that he was to play that day, I took great comfort in knowing he died doing what he loved to do.

For many of today's seniors facing the prospect of moving to a senior living environment, the mere mention conjures up visions of nursing homes from yesteryear. Perhaps they had a parent, other relative, or friend who spent their last days in a facility that was cold, sterile, and known as a place where people go to die. Convincing your loved one otherwise can seem nearly impossible. However, look for the magic keys such as a well-stocked library, a community garden, a bible group, or a creative writing club to assist with opening their minds.

This experience also taught me the importance of developing and maintaining hobbies and interests early in life, as they may be what bring us the most comfort in our older years.

How Safe are Your Medications?

Wed, 22 Apr 2009 14:00:00 GMT

When Kurt Rauer's doctor suggested he switch heart medications from Digoxin to Digitek he didn't think much of it. But after about a year of taking Digitek, he received a recall warning him of a potential problem with the medication dosage.

As it turns out, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) had recalled Digitek due to double the dose of medication in a single pill.

Yet what's most surprising is that Rauer received the warning not from his physician or pharmacist but from an independent drug safety service.

The RX Guardian, a service of Aging with Grace, is designed to keep you, the consumer, informed about the safety of your medications.

This free independent drug safety service supplies information on drug interactions, drug-disease interactions, safety alerts and medication recalls.

Whether you take a prescription drug, over-the-counter medication, or vitamin & herbal supplements, The Rx Guardian can keep you informed by providing personalized alerts from the FDA, manufacturers, and researchers about:

Recalls
Label errors
Interactions
Clinical findings

The RX Guardian service is FREE, SAFE, and SECURE for registered individuals who want to be informed, stay informed and share feedback about their medications. Members rely on their personalized information from The RX Guardian to take a more active role in their own care.

Features of The RX Guardian include:

Drug-interaction checker:

When you register, you input all the medications that you take (prescription, over-the-counter and even supplements). The RX Guardian processes this information and flags every potential drug interaction, and then sends a personalized risk-rating alert via e-mail.

Portable profile:

A printable document listing all the your medications and supplements to take to your doctors, keep with your travel documents, send to school/camp with the kids, etc.

To learn more, visit The RX Guardian web site

Aging with Grace,a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program,members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

Learning About Eldercare: It is Never too Soon to Start

Tue, 24 Feb 2009 14:00:00 GMT

Informal or family caregiving for an elderly loved one when they are ill or disabled is expected in virtually all cultures of the world and is generally accepted as the "norm" in most developing countries. In the US, family continues to provide most of the care and supportive services to older family members. The family contribution to health care represents between 70 to 80 % of all such care in the form of informal caregiving.

Family members provide both short-term assistance (e.g. following surgery) and long-term assistance (e.g. for permanent or extended loss function such as loss of sight, mobility or cognitive impairment). Family members provide direct services (grocery shopping, transportation to doctors), the purchase of services (housecleaning, nursing services) and the management of services (coordinating and overseeing medical/rehabilitative or custodial care) as well as financial, emotional and social support.

Who becomes the primary caregiver for a frail older person? Usually it is the spouse, followed by an adult child, or other such relative such as a sibling, niece or nephew or grandchild. In terms of gender, the primary caregiver is most often female. While it has been observed the world over that women assume the bulk of responsibility in caring for elderly family members, 40% of the current caregivers in the US are men (husbands and sons). Studies have shown that wives, adult daughters-in-law and daughters provide most of the personal care and help with the household tasks; transportations and shopping for the elderly while men are more likely to purchase services or provide the management of services. Women sometimes leave the work force or work part time in order to care for frail relatives (generally spouses or parents) just at a time when they may want to work for retirement benefits in their own old age. Other women have responsibilities for frail relatives while adjusting to their own retirement, widowhood and reduced incomes. Many school age children may have parents or grandparents who provide care to an older relative and may themselves be involved in the caregiving activities such as grocery shopping or providing custodial care after school hours in lieu of extracurricular activities.

Due to increased longevity, many caregivers are now finding themselves in the position of becoming "serial" caregivers -� providing support to a parent, then a spouse and in many cases to a functionally impaired adult child, or to grandchildren. An older adult caregiver may spend many decades in caregiving activities.

For many people, the overwhelming anxiety of eldercare issues may appear suddenly after an accident or unexpected illness. Having access to the right information and knowledge of available services and governmental resources can reduce the stress on the entire family at a time when quick decisions, with little or no preparation are necessary.

Aging with Grace,a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

Why Brain Fitness is Important

Wed, 11 Feb 2009 14:00:00 GMT

You may have seen a link to MindFit brain fitness training on our home page and been curious to learn more about the importance of brain fitness.

The importance of brain fitness is something you've probably been hearing a lot about lately. Brain fitness products are based on recent discoveries and developments that have been made in the field of cognitive science. Research shows that brain fitness is as essential to your good health as physical fitness. In fact, the two go hand in hand.

Maintaining brain fitness is important because, as you age, some of your cognitive skills begin to decline. Skills such as short-term memory and multi-tasking are most useful for keeping up with the pace of modern life. This cognitive decline, which begins in your early 30's, is a gradual process and it happens to everyone. If you do nothing to slow this process down, it can interfere with your quality of life as you age.

Thanks to a concept known as "neuroplasticity" there's a way to slow down and even reverse this process, through continuous cognitive stimulation. Recent discoveries have shown that exercising your cognitive abilities, by learning and practicing new skills, can measurably improve the way your brain functions. This is what brain fitness training is about. As with physical training, it requires regular online workouts. But it's easy to do, it's fun, and the rewards are well worth the effort.

Why CogniFit

We decided to partner with CogniFit because their brain fitness program, MindFit, is based on many decades of neurological research and development. What makes MindFit's approach different from other programs is that your training begins with a baseline assessment of the 14 cognitive abilities that are most affected by aging. Since no two people are alike, it makes sense that your brain fitness training program will provide better results if it focuses on the areas where you need the most work. From the assessment, MindFit learns which of your cognitive skills are working well and which are most in need of help. This allows the product to tailor your training regimen precisely to fit your unique cognitive profile.

Because your MindFit brain fitness training is designed just for you, it's very efficient. Over 90% of users see a measurable cognitive improvement after one training cycle. Just three 20-minute online sessions a week are all that's needed to produce measurable improvements in your quality of life.

Visit www.agingwithgrace.net� to learn more about MindFit and the special pricing offered to Aging with Grace members.

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Is the cost of Assisted Living tax deductible?

Thu, 22 Jan 2009 14:00:00 GMT

With so many seniors living in Assisted Living communities across the United States and many of them paying their monthly fees with their own financial resources, it is important to know that some or all of their costs may be tax deductible.�

According to the 1996 Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA), "long-term care services" may be tax deductible as an unreimbursed medical expense on Schedule A.

Qualified long-term care services have been defined as including the type of daily "personal care services" provided to Assisted Living residents, such as help with bathing, dressing, continence care, eating and transferring, as well as "maintenance services", such as meal preparation and household cleaning

For some Assisted Living residents, the entire monthly rental fee might be deductible, while for others, just the specific personal care services would qualify for a deduction.

Assisted living residents and their adult children should speak with their own income tax advisors to get clarification about their personal situation. Read full article

Aging with Grace,a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

Senior Holiday Gift Ideas

Mon, 08 Dec 2008 14:00:00 GMT

This wonderful time of year can be both joyous and stressful for many of us. With all the preparations and festivities involved you almost wonder if you will get through the season, let alone enjoy it. Yet we still manage to come away with yet more fond memories of a wonderful holiday season.

The holiday season is even more challenging when you're a caregiver, a demanding role at the best of times. As caregivers, we want to enjoy the holidays and make it a special time for our loved ones without feeling overwhelmed and drained.

With this in mind, here are gift ideas that families we suggest to help manage the stress the holidays can bring.�

Here are our top ten suggestions for senior gifts this holiday season:

Senior Fast Food Holiday Basket - contains food items that are quick and easy for the senior and also fast and nutritious, i.e. crackers, cheeses, single serve soups, single serve cereals, tuna, figs, dates, jellies, peanut butter, canned fruits, coffee, tea, sweeteners, and of course their favorite cookies.
Health and Beauty Basket - an assortment of the vitamins that they may take on a regular basis, Tylenol, soaps, hand creams, shampoo, toothpaste and/or denture cleaner, toothbrush, denture brush, shower cap, tissues or other items that they use all the time. This can be a significant savings for folks on a fixed income.
Pre-pay telephone and or cable bill for a few months. The payment will go as a credit on their bill. Again, a great savings for people with a fixed income.
Large face clocks or telephone with oversized keypads and adjustable volume (pre-programmed of course by a family member with all the most frequently called numbers.)
Gift certificates for the barber or hairdresser�s, neighborhood grocery store. Assortment of greeting cards, note paper and a roll of postage stamps. Large print playing cards, subscription for large print magazines and publications, large print calendar with generous spaces for noting appointments and special occasions. Decorative cozy throw for sofa or bed.
Memory Box: filled with pictures and mementos of significant events in the senior�s life, i.e. their wedding pictures and military pictures, kid�s baby pictures, school pictures, and letters from children and grandchildren, a copy of their favorite book, invitations from major events, etc.
Home Safety Box: Batteries for smoke and carbon monoxide detectors, night lights with built in sensors (remember a supply of replacement bulbs), Remember "The Clapper"? This is a great gift for a senior, new non-slip strips for bath tub, non-skid throw rugs, rubber bottle top grips, flash light with extra batteries or rechargeable flashlight that automatically comes on when power goes out, magnifying glass with or without a light attached, tote bag to attach to a walker or wheelchair for ease of carrying items, oven mitts and hot pads.
Video tapes of old TV shows such as I Love Lucy, Carol Burnett, Golden Girls, Milton Berle or tapes of old movies. Lawrence Welk is always a big hit! Many of these are available as gift sets or available through the local library. Plan to spend an afternoon complete with a picnic lunch and enjoy the shows.
Dinner for One (or Two) Club: prepare several dinners complete with dessert, freeze and place in their freezer for their future use. Be sure to mark what is in each container.
Make a "Family Memory" video. You might start with photos of Mom & Dad when they were young, school pictures, wedding pictures. If possible take shots of the neighborhoods where they grew up, the place where they were married, etc. Have each member of their immediate family (children, grandchildren and greats) record a message such as what the elder means to them. This is a wonderful gift that reminds the receiver how much they mean to the family and a chance to thank them for all they have contributed over the years.

Of course the best gift we can give our loved ones (and ourselves ) is meaningful time spent together. It only takes a moment to create a lasting memory.

We hope these suggestions might help to make this holiday season joyful and meaningful for you and your family.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus,the Alliance for Retired Americans and American Federation of Government Employees.

Coping with Elderly Depression around the Holidays

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 14:00:00 GMT

For most of us, the holidays are a time to gather with friends and family, celebrate, and reflect on the past and plan for the future. However, for some, especially older individuals, the holidays can be a difficult time. During the holidays, older adults may feel more acutely the passing of time, the absence of parents, siblings and friends who have died, and the distance of loved ones who have moved away. Traditional reunions and rituals that were observed in the past may not be possible and in their absence, the holidays may seem devoid of meaning.

It is normal to feel subdued, reflective and sad in the face of these losses and changes. But family members or friends may notice that a senior is experiencing the "blues" for a long time and what they may have thought was simple sadness is actually a serious case of depression.

Some major factors contributing to holiday depression in the elderly are:

�Financial limitations

Loss of independence

Being alone or separated from loved ones

Failing eyesight (and lessening of the ability to write or read holiday correspondence)

Loss of mobility and/or the inability to get to religious services

Depression is not a natural part of aging.

Everyone feels sad or blue sometimes, and the stress associated with holidays may stir feelings of loss or separation. However, a person who is sad or anxious around the holidays, can, in most cases, continue to carry on with regular activities. Such feelings are generally temporary and the individual eventually returns to his or her normal mood state. However, a clinically depressed person suffers from symptoms that interfere with his or her ability to function in every day life. These symptoms include much more than feeling blue.

When clinically depressed, the affected older person may lose the will to live. These persons begin to question the value of life and may think of suicide. There are often feelings of diminished self-esteem or excessive feelings of guilt. As these symptoms develop, the older person may take to bed or not bother getting dressed in the morning.

Appetite and sleep may suffer while lethargy sets in. The person may show little interest in his or her own welfare and little interest in doing things that in the past brought pleasure.

Recognizing depression in older individuals is not always easy. It often is difficult for a depressed older person to describe how he or she is feeling. In addition, the current population of older Americans came of age at a time when depression was not understood to be a biological illness. Those who are depressed may fear being labeled "difficult" or worse, or may worry that their illness will be seen as a character weakness.

Those who are depressed, their families and friends may think that a change in temperament or behavior is simply "a passing mood," and that the person will just "snap out of it." Unfortunately, a person suffering from depression cannot just "get over it." Depression is a medical illness that should be diagnosed and treated by trained professionals. Left untreated, depression may last months or even years.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus,the Alliance for Retired Americans and American Federation of Government Employees.

Eldercare Issues Impact the Workplace

Wed, 22 Oct 2008 14:00:00 GMT

Many caregivers today are sandwiched between caring for their own families, and assuming the responsibility of caring for aging parents and, in many cases, grandparents or even aunts and uncles.

Balancing all the responsibility has truly become a juggling act, especially for working caregivers. Attending a child�s final soccer game versus taking an elderly loved one to a medical appointment has become a stressful decision that tugs at the hearts of caregivers. Coupled with working full time, the reality of the days growing longer as the nights grow shorter becomes increasingly evident.

Although statistics show the burden of care giving still falls on the woman of the household, the number of men in this role is increasing steadily with a 60/40 ratio of female/male caregivers.

In light of the aging workforce, coupled with a decrease in the available workers needed to replace them, more and more forward thinking employers are offering elder care services to help their workers manage this growing issue. Elder care as a workplace issue is now at the stage where childcare was 20 to 30 years ago. If elder care follows the same trajectory that childcare issues took, employers could find themselves radically restructuring employment benefits policies to accommodate this social change. It is estimated that elder care issues presently cost the national economy $34 billion annually and this cost is expected to increase at a staggering pace. Realizing the impact that elder care giving responsibilities has on their employees, many forward thinking employers have made elder care services available to their employees as a benefit.

Providing greater access and utilization of the right kind of information allows an employee to balance their commitments to career and family while maximizing productivity and enhancing the employee's quality of life.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus,the Alliance for Retired Americans and American Federation of Government Employees.

Eldercare Issues: Beware of FREE referral, placement, and directory services: They are not really free

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 14:00:00 GMT

During these tough economic times, more and more stressed caregivers are gravitating to the web for help and guidance. With the plethora of "free" internet referral, placement, and on-line directory services for families in search of eldercare products and services such as homecare and assisted living, it is important to know exactly how these services make their money and how it might affect you and your loved one in the end.

Yes, they do provide their service to you at no charge; however the service providers that they refer you to pay them for their services. Since most employees of these "free" services work on a commission basis, it stands to reason that most will refer to providers who have agreed to pay the "free" agency a fee for your information rather than the provider that offers the services that best suit your loved one�s needs.

Typically, these "free" service providers are only interested in assisting families that can afford to pay privately for eldercare and at best send a cursory response referring people to their local Area Office on Aging office if they are not "financially" qualified. The "free" services that assist families regardless of their ability to pay, sadly, are the exception, not the norm.

There are also a host of listing or directory services which are actually lead generation services for senior care providers. They ask questions directly related to your care needs, finances and geographical requirements and then in turn "broker" your information to providers that pay them for your contact details. One overwhelmed caregiver that completed one of the online questionnaires on the web site of a leading provider of qualified lead generation/listing services, received 16 telephone calls in a 30-minute time frame from a variety of eldercare service providers who had paid this listing "broker" for her information. Not only was she barraged by the calls, but also it happened at work since she included her work phone.

So, "buyers beware" ��. be sure to read the fine print on these web sites so you are prepared to deal with the "cost" of utilizing these so called "free" services.�

Aging with Grace,a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus,the Alliance for Retired Americans and American Federation of Government Employees.

Eldercare Issues: NATIONAL SILVER ALERT ACT (H.R.6064)

Mon, 06 Oct 2008 14:00:00 GMT

NATIONAL SILVER ALERT ACT (H.R.6064)

The House of Representatives recently passed the National Silver Alert Act. This act is similar in structure to the Amber Alert for children. It establishes a formal system to quickly locate missing seniors, especially those suffering from Alzheimer's and other dementia related illnesses. The Alzheimer's Foundation reports that approximately 3 million Americans with Alzheimer's disease will wander away at some point in time.

The bill which is now heading to the Senate was originally introduced by U.S. Representative Gus Bilirakis of Palm Harbor, Florida. He brought up the idea after 86-year-old resident wandered away from an assisted living facility and was later found dead in the Intracoastal Waterway.

Once passed it will authorize up to $10 million in state grants to build and maintain Silver Alert programs throughout the Unites States.

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus,the Alliance for Retired Americans and American Federation of Government Employees.

Finding Funds for Eldercare: Veteran�s Benefit for Aid & Attendance

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 14:00:00 GMT

�The veterans of our country are entitled to health benefit programs from our federal government. However, few take advantage of the Non-Service Connected Improved Pension Benefit, commonly referred to as the "Aid and Attendance" benefits program. The program�s purpose is to assist Veterans as well as spouses or widows of Veterans with paying their out-of-pocket medical expenses.

Veteran Affairs (VA) considers the program as one of the department's most underutilized offerings. Here�s why: most veterans do not know about it, or how to apply.

To qualify for this important benefit, the veteran, either alive or deceased, must have served ninety consecutive days ACTIVE duty with at least one day during wartime with an honorable discharge.

The VA indicated periods of wartime are:

4/21/1898-7/15/1903 Mexican Border Period

5/9/1916-11/11/1918 World War I

12/07/1941-12/31/1946 World War II

6/27/1950-1/31/1955 Korean Conflict

8/5/1964-5/7/1975 Vietnam Era

8/20/1990-present Persian Gulf

In the case of a surviving spouse, the deceased veteran must have met the service criteria. The widowed spouse must have been married to the veteran at the time of his or her death and never remarried. In addition, he or she must have been married to the veteran for at least one year or have had children by the veteran.

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available. Visit our web site for tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus and the Allliance for Retired Americans.

2009 Medicare Parts A and B Costs Announced

Mon, 22 Sep 2008 14:00:00 GMT

2009 Medicare Parts A and B Costs for Beneficiaries

What you will be paying for Medicare in 2009:

Part B monthly premium $96.40

Part B annual deductible $135.00

Part A hospital deductible $1,068

Part A hospital daily co-pay $267.00 for days 61 through 90

Part A hospital lifetime reserve co-pay $534.00 per days, days 91-150

Part A Skilled Nursing Facility co-pays $133.50 per day, days 21 - 100

Part A "voluntary" enrollee premium

Fewer than 30 quarters of coverage $443.00 per month�

Between 30 and 39 quarters of coverage $244.00 per month

The Part B premium is the same in 2009 as in 2008

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available. Visit our web site for tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus and the Allliance for Retired Americans.

Tips for Reducing Eldercare Stress: The Reality of the Mirror

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 14:00:00 GMT

For a person with Alzheimer's, time is a matter of mind. Their here and now is often our past and long ago. Daughters become mothers and sons become fathers. For the most part, they are in the prime of their life and the thought of having grown children or grandchildren is often inconceivable.

So, when your mother who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, yells out, "Help...someone is in my room" or "there is a stranger in the bathroom," it is the reality of the infamous mirror that is playing tricks. However, as unsettling as this may be for you, her call for help is her reality. You need to respond in a calming and loving fashion. Don't contradict her and declare that no one is there. She taught you better. She saw someone she believes to be real. At this juncture, a confrontation is the last thing you need. So, assure her that you will take care of the situation. Calmly redirect her to a different room and attempt to involve her in a simple activity.

Full length mirrors tend to be the most offensive culprits. There is a life sized person from head to toe, staring at her. There is a life size person moving when she moves and being still when she is still. She doesn't recognize herself. Finally she cries out loud, "Who are you? Don't hurt me. Help someone, help me!"

Decorative mirrors or vanity mirrors are less offensive but can still cause a great deal of stress. The reflective image isn't full bodied but can still be perceived as a threat. A woman or man with Alzheimer's could become combative at the site of this stranger.

While it's best to remove these antagonistic objects, it is understandable that it may not be feasible. Therefore, be creative. Currently, there are many products on the market that can mask a mirror. Decals are also a good solution to break up the reflective images. Finally, you may even want to tape up a collage of favorite pictures for everyone to enjoy.

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available. Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus and the Alliance for Retired Americans.

Eldercare Stress: Helping a Senior Make a Smooth Move

Fri, 15 Aug 2008 14:00:00 GMT

When it is time to assist with transitioning a loved one from their "family" home, a place where they may have spent the last 30, 40, or 50 years the physical aspect of the move can indeed be a monumental undertaking. However, it is the psychological aspect that in many cases is the true source of overwhelming stress.

Having assisted many seniors with the task of "downsizing" and having to part with many of their treasures, I learned first hand the importance of giving the older person the opportunity to "let go" of their belongings. Often this process includes sharing memories, especially if it is the house where they raised their family and spent a major part of their life. I learned that closure and saying goodbye to the home the senior is leaving is the key to a successful later life move.�

If your time and/or patience is in short order, it might be wise to call in a professional senior move manager who is adept at dealing with the older population when faced with making a later life transition.

Proper preparation, along with allowing enough time to get through the experience by sharing memories, can help immensely with the later life transition.

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus and the Alliance for Retired Americans.

Tips for Reducing Eldercare Stress: Caring for the Caregiver

Fri, 01 Aug 2008 14:00:00 GMT

The added responsibility of caring for an elderly loved one can deplete a person not only physically, but also emotionally and spiritually. Caregivers very often experience depression, resentment, worry, helplessness, exhaustion, guilt, anger, and sadness.

The National Family Caregivers Association reports that 25 percent of caregivers feel "out of control" and "emotionally stressed," and 61 percent became more depressed after assuming a caregiver role.

Caregivers caught in a web of guilt, anger, and depression clearly put their own health at risk. So acknowledge these feelings and focus on positive ways to deal with them.

One of the best ways to combat your guilt is to start the process of self-care slowly.

Some tips include:

Rather than trying to take an entire day off, see if you can make arrangements for an hour of coverage. Then spend that hour any way you want, but don't feel guilty about taking time for you. Adopt a mantra: "Taking time for me guilt-free." Think of this as time for you to replenish yourself, your body, your soul, and your spirit.

Play music you like.

Wear perfume or cologne you enjoy.

Put on something you love to wear.

As you become more comfortable caring for your needs as conscientiously as you care for your loved one, pleasure and relief will soon begin to overcome the negative emotions.

Realize that your health matters - it benefits everyone if you stay healthy, less stressed and most of all "cared for".

Aging with Grace, a national eldercare resource company, has embraced the mission of educating, coordinating and facilitating the many eldercare issues that face you each day. Through our unique program, members have unlimited access to experts in the senior care field, who are ready to answer questions and guide individuals and their family through the maze of senior care options available.

Visit our web site to for more tips on reducing eldercare stress and discover all that Aging with Grace has to offer www.agingwithgrace.net

In affiliation with UnionPlus and the Alliance for Retired Americans.