Crushable

Celebrity Lookalikes: Garrett Hedlund And Rooney Mara

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 16 May 2012 23:03:38 +0000

Photos: Taste of Country/Quillings

I can’t even tell you what was going through my head, but a week or so ago I looked at a photo of On the Road star Garrett Hedlund and thought, “Weird, but he looks like he could be related to Rooney Mara.” Like, siblings, or at least first cousins. Think about it—they’ve got similar bone structure and coloring, and that same calm but piercing blue gaze.

Not convinced yet? Here are a few more photo comparisons.

Photos: Flixter/Barnorama

I’m not saying that Garrett seems feminine, or that Rooney comes off as masculine. (Even as Lisbeth Salander, it’s androgyny she’s going for, not drag.) And honestly, it’s her pre-Dragon Tattoo roles where you can make the best comparison, since she’s rocking her natural hair color.

Photos: Now Have Fun/The LA Times

Both are cool and collected here, and even have similar taste in fashion.

Photos: Zimbio/SF Gate

Of course, your best indicator is laughing. My sister and I look nothing alike, and only when we’re cracking up can people recognize any sort of resemblance.

I guess I’ve stopped this celebrity couple from ever happening, right?

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Not Content With Piranha 3DD, Syfy Brings Us Piranhaconda

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 16 May 2012 22:36:20 +0000

You would think that Syfy would let Piranha 3DD sweep through theaters on June 1, with its deadly armies of razor-toothed creatures and the promise of all the naked breasts and torn-apart bodies in glorious 3-D. But instead the network has decided to shove out its own take on the “deadly amphibious creatures” genre lickedy split—and it shows, as Piranhaconda looks like a low-grade porno with special effects dropped in from iMovie.

Piranhaconda was made in 2011 and stars a bunch of barely-recognizable actors who look like other stars. So if you squint, it’s almost as if Rob Lowe and Diane Lane are the adventurers who wind up on the receiving end of this part-snake/part-fish’s wrath. Adding to the amateur-porn feel, the snake apparently spits up its eggs onto the female cast members’ ample bosoms. Yeah, it’s that kind of movie.

And if you have basic cable, then you don’t have to pay anything for it when it comes out on June 16th. You’ll probably laugh just as much as if you had coughed up the $15 for a movie ticket, so good job, Syfy.

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Sacha Baron Cohen Does His Most Bizarre The Dictator Stunt Yet: ‘Killing’ Elisabetta Canalis

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 16 May 2012 22:00:05 +0000

Photo: Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

Our favorite version of Sacha Baron Cohen is when he’s mocking Hollywood and the American obsession with fame. So even though The Dictator is full of unfunny pube jokes, we’re heartened when we see Cohen roping in celebrities in promoting the movie. The best was when he “accidentally” dumped Kim Jong-Il’s ashes on Ryan Seacrest at the Oscars red carpet, and we know from the trailer that he manages to combine Megan Fox and Kim Kardashian in one joke.

His latest publicity stunt seems to be a mix of the two: He was recently photographed at Cannes with Elisabetta Canalis, first canoodling on a yacht… and then pretending to harass and murder her. Let’s look at the photographic evidence.

Photo: Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

At first, things seemed fairly run-of-the-mill: Gorgeous celebrity cavorts with rich, less attractive man in the middle of the sea, but just close enough for the photogs to capture. At least General Aladeen knows how to woo a lady.

Photo: FameFlynet Pictures

Everything seems to be going well as they apply sunscreen to each other’s sunkissed bodies. But then either he flashes Elisabetta — or as the photos from Perez Hilton imply, she asked to look at his package — and she rejects him with a slap to the face.

Photo: Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

Maybe he won’t let her take the photos to TMZ, but something has Aladeen motivated enough to start dragging Elisabetta below deck.

Photo: FameFlynet

And then they threw a body bag over the edge of the boat. Thankfully it was just a bunch of visuals without any context, because we can’t handle another “American women are whores” joke. Although he would be within his rights to mock the lengths to which people will go to stay famous; obviously Elisabetta’s breakup with George Clooney has had her taking on publicity stunts she wouldn’t have had to consider were she still George’s arm candy.

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Because You Always Wanted To See A Photo Of Harry Styles Wearing A Bra

Jenni Maier — Wed, 16 May 2012 21:13:48 +0000

Whenever I find something as amazing as this photo of young Harry Styles from One Direction on the Internet, the entire soundtrack from Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit plays in my head all at once. That’s just how my body reacts to this kind of excitement.

How did I get so lucky as to stumble upon this photo of young Harry from his childhood? I did so much black magic. You don’t just sign online and just happen to find a photo of grade school Harry wearing lingerie. Sorry, no one is that lucky. Not even the Crushable readers who now get to share this find with their 1D obsessed friends.

You have 1D obsessed friends right? Because sometimes I feel like the only person born in the ’80s who knows everything about them. I’m so tired of having to explain to my friends that a Zayn Malik is not a sexually transmitted disease. Nor is a Nialls Horan a dirty British slang terms. These are real men (well men-ish boys) with real talent.

Tell me the last time you walked down the street and 75 8th grade girls flung themselves at you. Sorry to get hostile, I just sometimes worry that not everyone appreciates this boy band. Long gone are the days of *NSYNC and O-Town’s wet dreams. These are our role models today and we have to accept that.

So accept it today by staring a this photo of Harry Styles wearing a bra. I mean, don’t stare in a creepy way. Just in an admirable way. A safe for work way.

(Photo: Happy Fame)

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Carly Rae Jepsen And Ryan Gosling Should Be The Next Canadian Power Couple

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 16 May 2012 21:06:15 +0000

Part of what we love about Carly Rae Jepsen is that she’s a typical twentysomething. And in a recent video interview with MTV, she revealed herself to be even more of an Everywoman by admitting that she has a crush on Ryan Gosling. Or as she said,

“I’m obsessed with Ryan Gosling. Not in like, the creepy way, I hope. Just in like, a healthy way… I’m obsessed with him in a completely normal way.”

At this point, to not daydream about Ryan Gosling talking feminism to you or pulling you out of the way of a speeding taxi cab means you don’t have a pulse… and yet, we can totally see Carly Rae dating Ryan. Mostly because they’re both Canadian, and there was something really sweet about him dating fellow Canuck Rachel McAdams back in 2005.

If we close our eyes while listening to “Call Me Maybe,” we can pretend it’s Ryan who’s the subject of Carly Rae’s lyrical love letter. Your stare was holdin/Ripped jeans, skin was showin’/Hot night, wind was blowin’? That describes him in just about every movie, though especially his most recent big romantic role in Crazy, Stupid, Love last summer.

Plus, they’re both incredibly memeworthy, as you can see from the above photo. His face plus her lyrics… it’s a match made in internet heaven.

Photo: Troll.me

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Jennifer Lopez And 6 Other Women Rule The Forbes ‘Celebrity 100′ List

TheGrindstone — Wed, 16 May 2012 20:49:46 +0000

Forbes put out what feels like its 87th list this month with the release of the Forbes Celebrity 100 list. Jennifer Lopez, with her $52 million in earnings in the last year and omnipresent-like quality, topped the list. Six other women including Oprah, Kim Kardashian, Katy Perry, Rihanna, Britney Spears and Lady Gaga managed to nab spots in the top 10. According to the Washington Post, this female heavy top tier shows the importance of “us ladies in the whole being-famous-and-generating-money business, the sort of significant thing that studio moguls should probably pay attention to.” More »

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If Matthew McConaughey’s Stripper Scene In Magic Mike Made You Hot, This Interview Will Make You Orgasm

Jenni Maier — Wed, 16 May 2012 20:27:34 +0000

Forget every “good” movie you’ve rushed to the theaters to see this year because we’re positive that the epic stripper drama Magic Mike will blow them all away. The movie stars genuine Hollywood hunks like Channing Tatum and Matthew McConaughey. Men so wonderfully beautiful and well-sculpted that you can’t help but use the incredibly outdated Teen Witch era term “hunk.”

This month the free-spirited actor/drummer Matthew McConaughey spoke with The Advocate about his gay fanbase, his filthy movie dancing and how he would respond to his kids if they came out. His answers simultaneously made me want to smile and check TBS to see if How To Lose a Guy in 10 Day was on. While I did smile, I’m sorry to say H.T.L.A.G.I.T.D was not playing.

When asked if he enjoyed stripping for the movie (as much as future movie viewers will enjoy watching), he responds:

At first it was scary as hell, but then it became like a drug, and I couldn’t wait to do it again. Look, I love to dance, but I’ve never been a stripper. Channing’s one of the best hip-hop street dancers I’ve ever seen, and I didn’t want to challenge his style, so I worked on my own strengths. I also knew that my dance had to be the dirtiest. It had to be wonderfully filthy.

A compliment for his male co-star and a nod to his wonderfully filthy dancing. What a gentleman! A knight in shining armor. Thong armor of course. He is a stripper.

He goes on to say that the support of the gay community means the world to him. And then makes my heart grow 3 sizes by continuing on to say that we need to do more than just “tolerate” people who identify as LGBT. It’s about empowering, not oppressing.

It’s much appreciated. You know, I have some good friends of my own who happen to be gay, and when it comes to gay, straight, or whatever, I’m for anything life-affirmative. I’m for gay power, straight power, male power, female power; everybody should feel empowered without oppressing anyone who’s different. You know those World Cup banners about tolerance? I always thought that was one short. No, don’t just tolerate me. Understand and accept me.

And now, just in case you’re not convinced that Matt (yes, we’re on first name basis now) is all kinds of awesome, this is how he responds to a question about his own children potentially coming out.

That’s got to be really hard for a child, even if they think the parents’ reaction is going to be great. I’d sit down, talk to them, and ask them to walk me through how they knew, because I’d want to be open about it. There’s nothing in me that can understand disowning your child because they’re gay. You deal with it, you support them, and you also help prepare them for how some people in the world will treat and think of them. I don’t think you can sugarcoat it, because they will run into some adversity and roadblocks.

Honesty and realism and acceptance all wrapped up into a nice quote. His children are not only lucky to come from physically beautiful parents, but also from wonderfully open parents.

This interview definitely made me respect the Rom-Com actor a lot more and slightly made up for his horrible choice to be in the Kathy Bates thriller Failure to Launch. I could wax poetic all day about this interview, which you should read in full, but I’d prefer to spend my time figuring out when the first Magic Mike tickets go on sale.

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Anchorman 2 Teaser Poster Doesn’t Tell Us Much About The Sequel But Is Still Occasion For Scotch

Natalie Zutter — Wed, 16 May 2012 19:54:17 +0000

We’re cautiously optimistic about Anchorman 2, and so far this new teaser poster doesn’t tell us anything—but its mere presence is also really exciting! Even just seeing these guys’ legs brings back memories of that wonderfully quotable movie… But who’s wearing two different pant legs? Well, Anchorman did have some very ’70s fashions.

OK, there’s one thing we might have learned: Seems like the sequel will be called Anchorman: The Legend Continues. Could it pick up in the ’80s where the original movie ended, or will it be some sort of go-between? Only time — and some teasers with actual plot details — will tell.

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