I asked the children to find dead sticks yesterday and they brought me a bunch of sticks just about a foot long. It was precious–but not quite what we needed to be able to hang ornaments on. We found just what we needed this morning by clipping twigs from an old bush that in the winter season looks to be without life. There are parts of us that have no life…where life once was or where life just has never been. It is our prayer that this journey of Lent together will reveal those places to us and that the Lord will breath new life into these places as we follow Him.

In my mothering, there have been so many things I have let go–some that I’ve had to let go and others that the Lord is calling me to bring back into my life. There are probably things I can’t even see yet that need to return…and the same for my children–things that need to return or things that the Lord wants to show us that He is ready to bring to them and have them add to their walks with Him to know Him deeper.

Arranging the twigs this morning…I ask for the Lord that as we fill these branches with ornaments that teach us of His faithfulness–that we will begin to trust in Him more and rest in His plans for our lives…

Today’s reading is on HAVING FAITH…

Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.(Matthew 17:20)

What does it look like to HAVE FAITH?

What does it look like to BELIEVE in Him?

What does it look like to have faith as small as a mustard seed???

To read this verse in context with the Biblical story…you can read more here:
14 When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him. 15 “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water. 16 I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him.”
17 “You unbelieving and perverse generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.” 18 Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.

19 Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?”

20 He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

For me…I am choosing to believe God is who He says He is. I am choosing to trust in Him to write the rest of my story. Every morning, I wake up to find the little sparrows on our table in different places. The children rearrange them–and I take joy as I drink my coffee to some times see them kissing, some times with the mommmy and daddy bird together while the babes are playing…some times all huddled together. The children move them around–and it is a sweet little thing I always look forward to observing.

His Word also says, “Three things will last forever–faith, hope, and love–and the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13).

Today–we start our journey with FAITH. Increase our FAITH Lord in YOU during this journey. Make our faith unwavering. Open our eyes to see, our ears to hear and our hearts to understand and grow our mustard seed faith. We open our hands to you and ask that you will lead us on this Lent journey…we want to PRESS IN to You and know You more.

Soooo…the WORD in our house lately is that Rico Suave has purchased 2 roundtrip plane tickets to Park City, Utah for a ski trip! One has Rico’s name on it–and the other…NOT MINE! I’m super excited that he did this–and I had to practically TWIST HIS ARM and make him do it because my sweet husband doesn’t want to leave me right now. (I heart my man!) BUT…there are times when little boys need a special get away–and I’m SO EXCITED to share that the other ticket belongs to Parker man!

Have you ever read the book Raising a Modern Day Knight?? It is AMAZING and full of goodness!!! Yes…this is what we are raising our boys to be–knights in shining armor!

TRUE STORY–Several years ago I was doing photography, and I was at a client’s house–a day I will NEVER forget. The mom was snickering telling me what her husband “hoped” their sons would get into when they were in high school…things they considered “cool” for boys to do. (I felt like I needed to cover my ears hearing what the hopes were for this tender, sweet 5 year old boy one day.)

I stood there–dumbfounded, not knowing what to say or how to respond…wanting a camera crew to jump out and shout, “JUST KIDDING! You are on candid camera!) I wanted to show love toward her and try not to offend her by acting shocked–and I think I was so surprised and just realized how sheltered I was in my world–that it’s just a different world…or it’s always been this way some are just more vocal about the reality of it. I realized that not everyone has the same desires for their boys–not everyone is raising their boys to be modern day knights–and ours might just stick out in the crowd. And that’s okay:)

It is our hope that they will pray for their friends–that they will pray for girls they HONOR as sisters in Christ. I hope they write them letters instead of texts. I want to raise them to open their doors…and stand up to excuse them from the table. To respect and encourage and to build them up in their walks with Jesus. You might be surprised what some kids these days are actually encouraged or high-fived even from their parents for doing. It’s a crazy world out there–and we’re choosing to raise our men to be men of honor. Okay…so if you haven’t read that book…it’s a great one!

ONE thing in this book involves special outings where father’s invest in their sons…have a little man to man building up time. I couldn’t be more excited for Parker to be turning 8 this summer and to take one of his first excursions–one of many–to be built up and to even simply bond with his daddy.

Here is Parker receiving his gear (FOR SKIING!)

I’m sending them with the flip video and a camera…and the countdown is ON like donkey kong:)

Frank’s Question

So–we were on the way to Timothy Ministry today (where our kiddos go once a week where they take extra curricular activities) and Parker (my 7 year old) was asking a MILLION of questions with unknown answers…How old was the oldest man that EVER lived in Biblical times??? If God made everything–then who made God?? If you had to guess how far space goes, what would you guess???”

These are GREAT questions–but at 8am in the crazy mini-van with a mom who hasn’t had COFFEE…I was answering them the best I knew how, “Parker–I don’t know! That’s a great question. Um–what do you think? Do you want to listen to some music;)???”

I looked in the rearview mirror, and I could see Frank THINKING HARD (you have to picture that sweet boy in that picture there in deep thought!). He was looking at the window and then his eye brows lifted and he SHOUTED, “MOM! MOMMA!!! Lis-en!!! Who was da GREATEST man dat eva lived??” And before I had a chance to answer my 3 year old threw one hand in the air and shouted, “JESUS! Dat’s right momma! JESUS!”

We all couldn’t help but laugh–and he had the BIGGEST Frank grin on his face. For those of you who KNOW Frank know he NEVER talks. But when he does–you better get ready!!! This 3 year old boy says the sweetest things when he does choose to talk. I can’t wait to see how God is going to use this little arrow!

And a checkup…
GREAT news. I went to the retina specialist and a cornea specialist yesterday. They confirmed that my blurred vision is NOT anything permanent and there is no damage to the optic nerve yet. They retagged me with Sjogren’s Syndrome and I started new anti-inflammatories for my eyes…and they are hopeful in 6 months I’ll be able to see clearly again. HOPEFUL! No more doctor visits for me this week:)

Thank you everyone who continues to lift me and our family up in your prayers. We are so, so thankful to be on this journey with so many dear believers all over the country who pray for us–many whom we have never met. I hope to one day meet each and every one of you who have prayed for us–and if not in this world…I’ll be finding you in glory to thank you for your prayers!!! Thank you also for the emails and comments of love and encouragement. How I treasure each of you!

Love in Christ,

Andrea

Every week, I visit random doctors for this ailment or that. One says maybe it’s the beginning stages of MS. Another confirms through blood work Lyme’s disease. My eye doctors send me up a tier each month to another specialist–even tomorrow morning at 7:30 (the best time for stay-at-home mommies to get in so they can be back home in time to start the day…changing diapers, fixing breakfast–and in my case–teaching homeschool to my two older ones while the younger two play Thomas.)

Every week, I feel like I lose more vision in my right eye…I’m more and more fatigued…I feel like I struggle with remembering things…and some days I’m challenged to pronounce words and I have to concentrate to express myself (so forgive me if this blog post makes no sense–but I hope it does:). I’ve always felt called to write–and my heart still wants to write a book–and I have to smile thinking maybe it’ll be a children’s book instead of the novel my heart has always longed to write. Still…I hold on–believing. I am called to walk by faith.

Last March, the Lord laid on our hearts the call to adopt a special needs little girl from China. I still believe that will happen. Walk by faith.

As we stepped out in faith, completed loads of paperwork, finished our home study…we dreamed of a BIG family. Richard asked me if I was SURE we were also done having children biologically. I laughed…winked at my man…and said, “Nope. I’m not sure;).”

These longings and hopes–they are still in my heart.

But for now, they are put to rest…just in a slumber. We are at peace. Yet, every now and again–when Laney says, “Momma, can I put this dress away that doesn’t fit me any more for my little sister?” or when I fold up the 18 month jammies that no longer fit Isaac…I feel it…the struggle between walking, trusting and believing and fear of accepting broken dreams…things that we were sure were promises and even calls from our sweet heavenly Father.

Have you ever experienced this?

Are you there now?

It’s the struggle between being called to walk by faith and fear of the future if things do not change the way I want them to.

2 Corinthians 5:7 “We live by faith, not by sight.”

And for us–we are walking by faith because we have seen and experienced His faithfulness on this journey.

Every step of the way, the Lord has provided…a new doctor–another person going through this same thing to shed light and encouragement. While every doctor seems to have a different plague for me to hear–there has been some light shed in it. Recently I found a new doctor who comes highly recommended…who thinks she can help me…but of course she doesn’t take our insurance. So–walking by faith here is emptying our adoption savings–trusting He will provide again–and spending $2,000 in just 2 visits in 2 weeks with many more on the horizon. But she is helping me strengthen my immune and GI system which have both been compromised–and I see bits of the puzzle being put back together. I heart though–wants it all at once.

I told Richard I want to reach out…and touch His coat…and be healed.

The God who performed miracles is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Don’t you love this story…

“A large crowd followed and pressed around Jesus. And a woman was there who had been subject to bleeding for twelve years. She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors and had spent all she had, yet instead of getting better she grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.

But Jesus kept looking around to see who had done it. Then the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell at his feet and, trembling with fear, told him the whole truth. He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.”

I have faith He CAN and WILL heal me. I really believe He will. But while I wait–I will just put one foot in front of the other and follow Him. I will go to the doctors He gives me guidance to go to–and on weeks He tells me to wait–I will wait. While this might sound crazy to many, I sense His presence and know He is enough and He is caring for me.

Today I can just see out of my left eye. I got glasses last July–and tomorrow I’ll need new ones as the blurriness grows. I’ll make decisions based on reality and what is true today–but I will also press into to Jesus. I will continue to reach for His cloak and in faith believe I can be healed–by Him alone.

Last night, I lay in bed unable to sleep. I felt I was battling so much more than unknowns…but there was a spiritual battle in all of this as well. I lay there hearing lies, “This is your new life…you’ll never be the same again…people are going to just think you are crazy as your memory goes…you have no future because you are going to get sicker and sicker and sicker…” Lie after lie–I whispered truth in my heart. THE LORD, MY GOD, IS WTH ME. HE IS ENOUGH. IN MY WEAKNESS HE IS STRONG. And I felt His Spirit calling me to CLING to Him and walk by faith. To trust Him. TO BELIEVE I COULD BE HEALED…and THAT I WILL BE HEALED.

I got up and went downstairs and began to pray. I took my supplements for my GI and sleep problems that join the list of issues I am striving to run the race with and press through. Then I felt Him guide me to go to my computer type something in the search engine. The first article that came up was enough to encourage my heart in the calling I feel He is
calling me to walk in…

To trust in HIM.

To wait on HIM.

To listen for Him to tell me what the next step is.

To walk by faith AND NOT BY SIGHT (I’m losing that anyway…so I better walk by faith right;)?!

I started this blog 2 years ago to document our adoption journey. God shined and showed off all through our adoption journey. If you don’t believe me–read this blog from beginning to end. I love how He laid the name ISAAC on our hearts–which means “to smile”…and what do you know the ONLY thing checked on our boy’s referral paperwork that HE COULD DO was “smile”. He was 8 months at referral–and couldn’t lift his head, he couldn’t sit and he couldn’t even eat anything other than the special formula UNICEF provided. We knew he was ours. The international pediatrician told us that the problems looked to great and she didn’t recommend us to accept His referral. YET the Lord gave us peace. We knew in our hearts Isaac…this boy who only smiles was to be ours…and we walked by faith AND NOT BY SIGHT. Praise God that we did! Praise God that He has healed our boy! Praise God that our problems with him now are just normal sharing and listening like any 2 year old boy! Glory be to God in the highest. We heard His call and followed. Despite what the world said–we listened to our Creator…because He is good. And ultimately His desire is to heal and bless His children He so dearly loves.

Last night–I felt the Lord whisper to my heart–to BELIEVE. To trust and believe I will be healed. This blog is no longer just about adoption–but about following Him…walking by faith…and trusting God is who He says He is and that He will do all He says He will do.

I believe we WILL adopt a little girl from China one day. I even believe it’s possible one day for me to have another baby. While doctors and the world might look in and say we are crazy…or that’s impossible–I have to tell them that I serve a God who makes the impossible possible and is able to do all things. I have nothing to prove–I don’t want the impossible just because it’s impossible. I want the impossible because I feel He is calling us to it. We will wait on Him, and REST in HIS PEACE.

Luke 1:36-37
“Now indeed, Elizabeth your relative has also conceived a son in her old age; and this is now the sixth month for her who was called barren. 37 For with God nothing will be impossible.”

Matthew 19:26
“But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

The next practical steps for us is to decide if we are going to stick with the naturopath doctor who has been treating me since November, go with this new internal med doctor here who thinks she can help me (as we deplete the adoption fund–that I know He will refund in His time) OR to head to a new doctor in Florida who will take a more aggressive route with putting a pic line in and doing IV antibiotics with mommy probably getting really sick before she gets better.

I will not live in fear but wait on Him to lead me. And I won’t lie to you and tell you that I haven’t had fears since this new journey began because it actually started in fear. My calling my daddy crying–telling him I was scared how this all might turn out. I caught myself praying with my children for mommy to be healed–and then I realized I needed to teach my kids not for mommy to be healed (for this cup to be taken from me)–but instead for HIS WILL TO BE DONE. That is how Jesus taught us to pray. That is the example He set. The lessons we are learning as a family…will change us forever…as we are learning to trust in Him in new ways together and to walk by faith and not by sight.

We are holding hands now believing in His healing power–and reaching for His coat. I will press into Jesus…nearer and nearer…trusting in His perfect timing…and His will to be done.

And I will lift my hands in worship while I wait on His promises to be filled…believing ONE day I will be completely healed. And this story–it will be a testimony to His healing power.

He who has called you will not forget you–His timing is perfect. Will you trust Him and believe Him with me? If there are things in your life you feel He has called you too–and you are longing to be restored so His promises can be fulfilled…take a minute to sit before Him…to listen to this song…and step out in faith with me…trusting Him in a deeper way…

Our first lesson consisted of memorizing the poem “The Caterpillar” by Christina G. Rossetti. We added to that by role-playing a bit and extended it in an art activity. THEN we took it to Mama Reid (their GREAT-GRANDMOTHER) on her 90th birthday!!! Frank, our 3 year old, REALLY wanted and tried to memorize it–but he opted to take an extra’s role and acted as the bird:)

Here is their rendition…

Soooo…that was our Monday! OF WHICH–I also fit in going to my new doctor and did some kind of treatment where they take blood, put something in it and then put it back in. Starting this different Lyme’s treatment and we’ll see how it goes. I’ve been SOOOOO tired lately so I’m hoping to turn a corner soon:)

Today–we celebrated Valentine’s AND Parker’s half birthday a few days early:). I figure if you are going to celebrate your half birthday–it’s alright to do it a few days early! Can you tell we LOOK for days to celebrate over here???!!! But isn’t that a fun thing about LIFE and about being a MOMMY!!! Teaching our children to look for reasons to celebrate life!

I have to tell you–it was partly an excuse to party with the McBrayers–a family we do A LOT of life with. Our Valentine’s were also out of town on business–so it was a great excuse to party together. Our girls made too cute Valentine’s tees, our boys played and we laughed! THEN I came home–and my sweet 7.5 year old;) came and grabbed me–and said, “MOM! Today was the best birthday I’ve ever had! We got to eat candy for Valentine’s. I got to give a bunch of glow sticks. We ate with the McBrayers. THEN we had birthday cake. Really!!! It was THE best birthday I’ve ever had!”

And to think…I just decided this year I’d be fun and start celebrating half birthdays;). I’m totally IN now. That was totally stress free and REALLY fun!

Oh and I ALMOST forgot to tell you what we did on FRIDAY. We went with the McBrayer’s to see an exhibit at the High Museum of Art. It was the Picasso to Warhol exhibit–and it was amazing…and the kids LOVED it. I mean LOVED it. They had their little head phones on–and they would go to each piece, type in the number of the piece and STAND there–taking it in. FRANK especially loved it!!! And adults around us would just stand back and look at FRANK instead of the ART because of how into he was!!! The funniest part was when he spotted Pollock’s piece and said loudly, “THIS ONE’S MY FAVORITE!”

Now…let me tell you WHY this is his favorite;). Cause Frank’s baby brother LOVES Olivia–and we have to read this book almost every night:)

How fun is that?! Parker says he can totally paint just like Pollock if he wants too;)

Alright–a disclaimer from this post–PLEASE do NOT let this blog post fool you that I’m on top of it and have it all together. Because I don’t. And it’s okay for you not to have it all together too:). More and more, I learn that it’s really just DAY by DAY by DAY. Because each day has enough trouble of it’s own (Matthew 6:34). We really have to just LOOK to the LORD–and not compare ourselves to anyone else—to simply put one foot in front of the other each day and just do the best we can for HIS glory (and NOT our own). That means…undone laundry, a sink full of dishes and remembering at 10:30pm you need to make your kids Valentine’s with glow sticks that say “You make me glow!” (yes–I know…my kids should do it for themselves…but we were doing other things–and that’s okay!) Keep your eyes on Jesus–pray to Him throughout the day–trust Him to walk with you through it–LOOK for Him as you walk…trusting and believing He is with you…and at the end of the day…REST. It’s really amazing that when you decided to JUST start living for THAT DAY–you really fill it with SO MUCH more than if you wasted time worrying or even planning too much for tomorrow. JUST TODAY–one at a time–trusting Him to be with you through it!!!

Blessings to each of you.

Andrea

This morning in the worship service at our church I was taken back as I listened to the testimonies of several new believers before they were baptized…

First–an 18 year old girl who had struggled with identity after having a learning disorder. She had struggled through school. Struggled with self confidence. And finally–she met her Savior. His grace was enough for her.

She shared about her life growing up as an only child–and then finally becoming content with who she was in CHRIST. He is enough.

Then she shared about a radical change in her family’s life. Her parents adopted 3 children out of foster care–who were refugees from across the world. Their birthmother suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder and relinquished her rights as she entered an institution and was unable to care for them. This 18 year old girl–then struggled through family changes…no longer being the only child and having 3 brothers enter her home who were struggling with their own changes and grief. The Lord worked in her heart–and taught her to give more than she had ever known possible…and as she followed Him–He led her to love more than she ever thought possible. HIS GRACE was enough.

Her father baptized her…and the tears fell down my cheeks. And then as she stepped out of the water…her father remained in the water—to baptize now one of the three sons who had now found Jesus.

He shared about being a refugee. His eleven year old voice so strong, yet quite–he had already lived a hundred years in his life time. He shared about losing his family and entering the foster care system here in the U.S. He shared about being ALONE–although he had two brothers by his side. He shared what was once his fear…and how darkness seemed to follow one thing after the other. Ant then…

a family…

A family came forward to adopt not only him–but his other brothers as well. A family who had just one older princess who was beginning her walk with her King. He shared about seeing Christ through his new family…he now had parents, a sister, aunts and uncles and grandparents—WHO LOVED HIM. And then…He accepted Christ. His grace was enough.

Just before his father baptized him, he looked at him and told him that God’s grace covers him. And then he was baptized in believer’s baptism and raised to new life with Him. And my shoulders couldn’t stop moving as I weeped for joy. THIS! This is why we grow.

To hear this boy say, “I praise Him because I am not only adopted here on Earth–but now I am also adopted by God forever as His child!”

THIS IS IT!

Oh that OUR children would know Him…that we would NOT get caught up in the busy culture of our world…that we would sit before Christ and bring our children with us. If we choose to grow our families for any other reason besides THIS…then what is it for??? His grace alone.

We can get side-tracked by others–by comparing ourselves to others–by worrying about the next thing. We can stress out about our children with learning disabilities–will they catch up…will they be accepted…when in reality–just like this 18 year old girl who had academic struggles to overcome…really–that has no value in eternity. She let the world push her down for a time–and then she met Jesus! His grace is enough!!! How we spend time with your children, the way we educate them, the things we surround them with should be LESS about keeping up with the world and instead EVERYTHING about what shines more of Christ into their lives…so that ONE DAY–Lord willing–they too see that His grace is enough for them.

Oh that we would keep our eyes on Christ–and live out our days to walk more closely with Him…that we’d be okay with letting dust settle here and there in our homes so that we might instead focus on having clean, pure hearts and motives…that we’d make decisions based on eternity instead of this world.

His grace is enough…for you and for me. May you rest in His grace this blessed Sabbath.

xoxo,

Andrea

On Monday, however, I decided it’d be more interesting to teach and learn if we were Egyptians:) Frank didn’t seem to understand. I’m quite sure there were pirates then…minus the Mater hat of course;)

I even pulled up “Walk Like an Egyptian” on YouTube and showed them how it’s done;)

LOVE my little Egyptian princess!

On a side note–Laney asked me yesterday: “Mommy, do you wish you had golden hair like me?” OH YES baby girl. I love how she describes her hair…she is truly a little princess through and through.

And this one is for Papa. My dad is a HUGE Alabama fan–and as many of you know Rico Suave and I do NOT get wrapped up in sports. So despite Rico Suave being a GA boy (Rico’s daddy was an All-American at UGA) OR my being a Tigerette for Auburn back in my day)…my daddy thinks it’s funny to gift us lots of Alabama gear. My parents weren’t even here this weekend–but because it’s fun for them to match…AND because I get this stuff for free…I geared them all up on Saturday. Now in the SOUTH college football is HUGE–so I think people ’round here think we’re weird that we gear our kids all up in another states gear that we don’t even root for–even rivals of the teams we went to. It’s free people–and football really doesn’t matter…so this is just like princess and pirate stuff to me;) Aren’t they cute though???

Check out my line-backer’s game face in this one…

Isaac calls this his “MAD FACE”! Watch out people…

looooove this sweet boy!

Frank on the OTHER hand…he doesn’t do so well with a “mad face”…

Just in case you’re missin’ Parkerman. He says he’s too cool for our shenanigans. We are still counting down the months (almost 8 months waiting) for one of his front teeth to break in:)

In OTHER news. The kids have decided they really want a baby in our house. I told them we ALREADY have a baby! I ran to the garage–carried the stroller downstairs…popped on the carriage attachment that I never used for Frank…and put it to use! We played “push the baby” which involved running and turning corners AS FAST AS YOU CAN! Our “baby” had a blast!

AND…YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT…

LAST but not least…Y’ALL get geared UP for the 2012 Wiphan Warthog Waddle! THIS YEAR…Frank and Isaac will be taking each other on in the 1K…and Frank is sacrificially agreeing to give Isaac a 30 second HEAD START! Stay tuned for a rockin’ promo video featuring these two. You know we don’t play when it comes to Wiphan Waddle promo videos And a sneak peak of this year’s Wiphan Waddle’s trophy (carved in Ndola/Zambia by Justin one of Wiphan’s skills training teachers)…modeled by my sista April…YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT;)

That’s a wrap folks! I want to say thank you for all the comments of encouragement and prayers you guys have been sending our way. Thank you for being on this journey with us…I know He makes ALL things beautiful and I’m truly excited to see what He does through it!!!

Love y’all!

Andrea

This morning I went to a new doctor because I’ve been a little frustrated with doctors scratching their heads…giving me prescriptions…and feeling like the current holistic meds really aren’t helping. I found a new doctor that specializes in internal medicine and is really known for her work with infectious diseases (Lyme being one of them). I was kind of hoping she would tell me that everything looked great–and I could go on my way. BUT I really knew by my symptoms that probably wasn’t the case. And that was the case. Frustrating for a mommy who just wants to REWIND and hit PLAY again and get back on track with what was normal…and continue in our adoption in bringing home a little princess from the China special needs program.

I sat there today telling the doctor that maybe I was just crazy–but as she looked over my tests she assured me that I was not. Then I felt that bubble in my throat…wanting to cry…but I didn’t. As I listened to her go over my tests and order a million more…I had hope—that hopefully we are on the right track. We have gone out of our network to someone who comes highly recommended–and at this point–I just said I don’t care what we have to pay…just to KNOW what we are dealing with and to get mommy all better again. They drew more blood…even cut hair off at the roots for testing…you name it…and finally sent me home with lovely stool sample collection kits. Before leaving, I made another appointment for more blood work next week–and then came the bill.

OUCH.

I sat there…sad.

Not because it’s so expensive–although it does stink having to leave network for the best doctor to be able to treat you.

And I wasn’t sad because I’m up to my ears frustrated because my rheumatologist, infectious disease doc, opthamologist constantly contradict one another–because truly–I’m weird…and that part has been comical and entertaining to me. And I really feel like the LORD is leading me…and we are finally on to something–and in good hands.

Sad…because every month I watch our adoption savings account go away…to another blood test, another doctor…another thing recommended to help with a promised, faster recovery–which in my heart and mind really means bringing home a little girl who my heart longs for.

BUT…my plans are not His plans.

His plans are greater…

RIGHT?

They are…RIGHT?

My heart…it does believe this.

And as I drove away–I was thinking that I bet we could be sweating some of these appointments had we not THOUGHT we were going to adopt and stashed every extra penny away for adoption expenses. Still…this wouldn’t be my first choice of alternative ways to use it. Just saying.

As I sat here–I heard His voice speak to my heart…MY WAYS ARE NOT YOUR WAYS…

I looked up Isaiah 55. (bolding is mine:)

He has a purpose for ALL things.

Nothing from Him is without purpose.

EVERYTHING will accomplish what He desires for it.

And in it…before, during and after–He will lead out with JOY…He will lead out with PEACE.

Even the mountains and hills will burst out in song before me!

And instead of thorns…life will grow. Beauty will grow from hurt…and all this waiting–will be worth it…because His purpose–His story for your life and my life–always prevails. Nothing can thwart God’s purposes.

And THIS…

This life that springs out in the darkness…

Will be–

FOR THE LORD’S RENOWN.

And the purpose…the fruit from it…will not go away.

As I sat there today–I desperately wanted to REWIND. But not now. I know this is good. Now…I just dream of the fast-forward. Not to rush through any of it…but the excitement, the expectation, know the purpose one day of what all of this was for. I have a feeling that I will look back and be thankful for all of this–and that I’ll even say that I’d do it all over again. Because I really believe His story for me–is going to end that beautifully.

Blessings to you as you wait on His beautiful plan for your life.

Love you all to pieces in Christ Jesus…

Andrea

For those of you wanting to join me in creating a Lent tradition, I have created 5 word documents for you to download and print so that you can walk your children through Lent growing in the knowledge and understanding of God and the Passion of Christ. This activity requires you to find 41 treasures for the 40 days of Lent (a few after to celebrate the resurrections!). EACH day you will have a scripture reading and an ornament that accompanies it. PRIOR to beginning this journey–you will need to go on a mommy scavenger hunt all over town (dollar stores, craft stores, etc) to locate an item for each day. This will be not only an amazing journey for your children BUT ALSO FOR YOU!

When your children are little–I encourage you to read the scripture before hand and then retell it so they can grasp it according to their age level. As they grow older, they will be able to sit through the entire chapter (or chapters) of reading, and each year you will be amazed at the nuggets the Holy Spirit gives them through each day’s reading.

The list that I used is in each document download. I found these 41 treasures (one day is a “nothing day” as you wait on the resurrection) at Dollar Trees, Hobby Lobby, ebay and some I made myself out of felt when I couldn’t find the ornament recommended. These word documents were created to be printed on shipping labels—so you can easily print them on 2″x4″ labels and stick each label on a ziplock bag to store your ornaments in to remind you the story and verse—as well as to store safely from year to year.

All the work has been done FOR YOU as far as the labels go! Now…you just need to run to the store and buy white shipping labels – 10 per sheet 2 in x 4 in. (I bought Office Max’s offbrand and it matches the download template of Avery 8163). But as long as you purchase the 2″x4″ with 10 on a sheet—this should work!

I followed the instructions found in Carol Brazo’s book “No Ordinary Home: The Uncommon Art of Christ-Centered Homemaking” which by the way is a must have in any mommy’s library! Carol Brazo walks you through how to beautifully celebrate the final week of Lent, Holy Week, with your children—and this is SURE to be a memory they will forever hold dear in their hearts as they encounter the Savior this powerful week in an amazing way. My favorite is one of her explanations of how she celebrates Sunday…

On the FIRST day of Lent–you will read the Bible story to your children and your littles will take turns putting the ornaments up on the tree each night. The first ornament: a teeny, tiny mustard seed. Your first scripture reading is short–Matthew 17:20. Short, but not simple. It is about faith. And faith we will need on this journey to the cross.

Matthew 17:20 says, “And He said to them, “Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you.” Oh Lord, will you give my little preschoolers faith for this journey with us. Oh that Your Holy Spirit would teach them and do a miracle in their great big hearts the Lent as we travel the Lent Tree journey together…

Now it sits empty…but in a few hours it will have a mustard seed. If we have faith the size of an itty, bitty mustard seed…then nothing will be impossible for us.

We found twigs from our own yard for our Lent Tree. We attempted spray painting it white–but found it much easier to paint it with white acrylic paint and sponge brushes. Two paint cans are needed if you spray paint only. Just a small amount of acrylic white paint and a single sponge brush is needed to paint it yourself. This would be a fun (and messy…but in a good way…fun/messy:) do to with your children! AND I’ll tell you that your tree will be JUST AS PRETTY NOT painted. My friend Christy found cool artificial twigs at Hobby Lobby that she keeps as a table center piece year round and uses as her Lent tree each Lent season. As we find twigs for our tree–we talk about how these twigs no longer have life–essentially they are dead. But throughout the season, we will add ornaments to them bringing life to our tree just as Jesus Christ offers life to us through the cross.

For those of you without little ones at home or with wee ones too young to understand, consider doing this with your spouse! This is a worshipful way to walk through Lent together, and what fun it could be to treasure hunt each day for that day’s ornament. At the end, you’ll have a precious set to keep in a Hope Chest for that baby you have hoped for or even as a gift to a grandchild. Either way, the Lent Tree isn’t just for families with children. I think adults enjoy it just as much…if not more!

IMPORTANT to read if you are doing the Lent Tree with us! DO NOT do an ornament on Sundays during Lent! There are 40 ornaments—and there are 40 days of fasting between Ash Wednesday and Lent *IF* you don’t count Sundays! SOOO—you will do ornaments Monday through Saturday only following Biblical Lent tradition. “When observing fasting or abstinence during Lent, regard must be paid to the fact that Sundays are Feast Days, so there is no fast or abstinence. The days from Ash Wednesday to the day before Easter Sunday, excluding the Sundays, are forty, corresponding to the number of days Christ spent in the wilderness.” So…technically you fast for 6 days and then Sunday is a Feast day where you get to have what you fasted. Did ya know that??? Lent is a custom not a Biblical requirement–and traditionally you fast for 6 days and on the 7th day you celebrate the resurrection with a Feast day.

Here are some examples of some of the ornaments we found and use year and after year:

The story of Adam and Eve…how sin was brought into the world and how Jesus would cover our sin

The story of Abraham and Sarah…Abraham having to work the land

The story of Isaac…God providing a new sacrifice

It will take some time to find all your ornaments but it will be a fun, interactive way for you to study God’s Word together! It is SO worth the mommy scavenger hunt! I am about to teach 17 sweet ladies in my Sunday school class how to do this–so we’re making it a PJ Party night and I’m dividing up the ornaments so each mom will only need to find 3 each. They will just buy 17 of 3 each and then we’ll come together and share the wealth…and have a really fun girls night that will bless our families for years to come!

Hope this inspires some of you in ways you can invest Eternity into the hearts of your children!!!

Blessings to you!

Andrea