Kindergarten Readiness and More

Thanks again to Jill, Mahealani, Moani and Yasmin for having me on again this morning. I took viewer questions live on discipline, kindergarten readiness and more!

Baby # 3 is now READING. Wow! How did we get here? My thoughts and suggestions.

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

ADHD Questions and More

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

I’m digging deeper into the decision of whether to start Kindergarten this fall — or not. Look out for 4 in-depth posts on the subject. Check out my video over here –> for a sneak-peek!

Next, check out my first post in the series, where I show you how I make tough parenting decisions when there isn’t an easy answer. You can apply my method to your kindergarten decision, or any other tricky parenting dilemma.

Here’s the second post, for parents of shy kiddos. Even they can have a great start to their school careers.

And now for the third post. The “Redshirting” craze has me worried: Here’s why.

My fourth post requires a box of Kleenex for the sentimental among you (and I certainly count myself a member of your group). Our babies are growing up so fast! Some ideas on how to Let Go As They Grow. (Sigh.)

There will be 4 total entries this month, and I’ll post as they’re ready for you — so come back and check for each in the series.

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

Mahalo to Jill and the gang at KITV!

Despite awakening at 4 am with bloodshot eyes from an allergy attack (perfect for HDTV, right?) — I was psyched to head down to KITV yesterday morning to talk story with the gang about parenting. So mahalo to Jill Kuramoto for inviting me, and a big aloha to Mahealani Richardson, Moanike’ala Nabarro, and Yasmin Dar for making me feel so at home in the studio. Looking forward to seeing you all again next month!

Here’s the link: Dr. Heather on KITV — January 17, 2012

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

Rip it up, girl!

I’m especially proud of this post I wrote for my fab partners over at The Learning Care Group: Check it out, and let me know what YOUR tips are for staying sane when trying to stay on top of it all.

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

Sometimes I need a good cry before a nap, too.

One of the most primitive, innate reactions any mom has is to comfort her crying child. But as we’ve talked about here before, many babies can tolerate — and thrive — with some crying, when their parents thoughtfully decide why and when that might be necessary.

That’s why articles like this leave me mystified — especially when they come from one of my shrink colleagues.  Her bottom line is that CIO is dangerous. She trots out all the old arguments, hailing the Dr. Sears “science” behind her claims, and providing one of the most common misinterpretations of infant research. She makes the mistake that clinical research findings about abused and maltreated babies — babies who were pervasively denied their needs over the long-term — should be applied to NORMAL babies in NORMAL families.

The fact is, there is no evidence whatsoever that occasional CIO in typically developing babies causes any damage. PERIOD.

More importantly, there IS evidence that severely sleep-deprived mothers are at much higher risk of developing an already common –and dangerous — condition: postpartum depression. And PPD certainly CAN lead to long-term damage to both baby — and the entire family. CIO is a method that, when implemented thoughtfully, can often lead to improved sleep (and health and happiness) for everyone.

Firebombs like those thrown in the Psychology Today article only make the burden heavier on moms. What a shame.

Aloha as always,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

PS: Wow, what a response! After commenting here, please also see the comments developing over at the Fussy Baby Site.

See? I'm 5 now!

Remember this guy? This sweet, cuddly, awesome 4-year-old? Well, now he’s a big 5-year-old, and he’s been in kindergarten for about 7 weeks. He started out with an enthusiastic bang, but now we’re dealing with tears and major foot-dragging when it comes to going to school.

I know, I know — I shouldn’t be surprised. “Help! My Kindergartener Hates School All of a Sudden!” is one of my most popular posts — and a very common parenting dilemma. Fact is, young children are totally different animals than “school aged” kids — and by that, I mean 8-year-olds and up. Little kids are still developmentally more like preschoolers. And that means they’re likely to change their minds about — well, just about everything. So, starting off kindergarten all excited — then losing steam after a few weeks — isn’t a surprise. Check out my post (and the growing comment section, with my additional suggestions) for coping ideas.

And hang in there, if you’ve got a balking kindergartener. Usually, if you can support your child through this tricky developmental stage, the protests wind down by Thanksgiving.

In the meantime, Happy Halloween!

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink

A Classic Must-Read

I’m reading every parenting book ever written on an obsessive quest to find helpful nuggets and insights to include in my first BabyShrink book. Those of you who know me know that I think much of what’s available these days is garbage. Junk. Not practical. Not worth the money.

But once in awhile, I find a gem. Most of these gems are “oldies but goodies” — dated, in some ways, but true and superb in the way that classics always are.

Louise Bates Ames, PhD, wrote a whole series of parenting books over 30 years ago, with a new book for each year of life. I’ve read most of them, but so far, this is my favorite. It might have to do with the fact that I have a particularly spicy 1-year-old in the house (thankfully NAPPING, at the moment — something I don’t take for granted with her).

Ames doesn’t take 12-24 months for granted, like so many other parenting writers. Ames contends that, in fact, this is one of the trickiest ages to parent – and I fully agree. In this book, she explains why — and gives the simplest, sweetest, most effective suggestions I’ve ever read on how to contend with your newbie toddler.

Enjoy.

Aloha,

Dr. Heather
The BabyShrink