Bad Stock Art

Searched for: surprised businessman (redeux)

badstockart — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 23:03:35 +0000

Well kids, we finally received our first scary legal email from one of our favorite places to find the best stock photography garbage. We had to remove many of our classic favorites. It’s sad, we know. We’ll have to start licensing all of our junk from now on, like this junk here.

Hulk scared!!!

Searched for: blue collar worker (pt4)

badstockart — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 14:25:10 +0000

Um, can you at least throw a tarp down before you cut off your own head? It’s just common decency.

Don't worry, this is just a cry for help.

Searched for: blue collar worker (pt3)

badstockart — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 19:41:53 +0000

The photographer has prudently depicted a timeless classic: the business casual ladies spank fight. It’s a scene we’ve all witnessed at the office before, and FINALLY, for a nominal licensing fee, advertisers can use this image to sell products of all kinds to needy children near and far. Or just laugh at how stupid it is.

It's my turn to use the facsimile machine!

Searched for: blue collar worker (pt2)

badstockart — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 17:58:21 +0000

Is stripping considered a blue collar job? I suppose maybe it is…

Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

Searched for: blue collar worker

badstockart — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 18:17:06 +0000

Work it till it hurts, bitch!!! I have NO EFFING CLUE why jumping is so popular. It’s not really an expression of any kind. Except in this case, it expresses this fierce bitch working it until it hurts.

Ohhhh yeeeeahhhh!! FEEL my delivery!!!

Searched for: fashion model (pt5)

badstockart — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 15:45:05 +0000

Finally. She’s dead. I assume she’s supposed to be exhausted from running on the treadmill. But I think she’s tired of posing like an idiot for her boyfriend, er, “photographer”. (Yes, those are sarcasm quotes)

Dead. Like my modeling career.

Searched for: 4th of July

badstockart — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 15:33:48 +0000

If only this were a hugely popular tradition and the streets were filled with naked couples wrapped in flags. Brings a patriotic tear to my eye… sniff…

Hey, where's the flag pole ... OH! there it is...

Searched for: fashion model (pt4)

badstockart — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 17:02:32 +0000

I couldn’t help myself – I had to pick on this girl again. Her confused, raised-eyebrow expression is supposed to be her “sexy look”, I suppose, since she’s not wearing underwear. Add to this the awkward way she’s kicking out her leg and it’s clear that something “not good” is going on “down there”.

Got that not-so-fresh feeling? Maybe you shouldn't put hammers down there.

Searched for: fashion model (pt3)

badstockart — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 17:55:45 +0000

Dear photographers… Please don’t set up confusing compositions full of obscure objects. I know, you were just trying to get that model in bed, but, do you really have to publish and attempt to sell the useless fruits of your fantasy photo album? (she’s wearing a utility belt and posing at a “construction site”, if you’re still trying to figure that out)

Who wants to get hammered? I'm lookin at you, big boy.

Searched for: fashion model (pt2)

badstockart — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 17:33:52 +0000

There he goes again… trying to intimidate us with his aggressive emoting and gangster props. That cowboy hat just screams aggravated assault.

Does this gun make me look scary?