Bad Stock Art

Superbowl part 2

badstockart — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 19:46:44 +0000

The illustrator named this picture “Football Bowl”. I like how the weird blood red table cloth is both inside and outside the bowl. That’s football bowl magic.

Happy Football Bowl everyone

Superbowl

badstockart — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 20:02:08 +0000

Get it? It’s a pig kicking around a pigskin. You know, the flesh of his mother or best friend wrapped around a ball. FUN!

Touchdown!

obese child

badstockart — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 02:15:44 +0000

Is this kid praising Jesus or summoning his flying animatronic friends to come feast on the living?

Come brothers! Let us devour the fat ones first!

determined woman (pt 3)

badstockart — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 19:52:05 +0000

The stupidity of this stock photo speaks for itself. But not for long.

Cut. It. Out. No don't. Really, don't.

comforting mother

badstockart — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 23:38:10 +0000

Not much is more comforting than the warm embrace of a clown.

Mommy the other clowns said they eat bad little boys. You won't eat me, will you, Mom? Mom?

Searched for: determined woman pt 2

badstockart — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 02:48:06 +0000

The title of this is “young woman accepts medicine”. I’m going to go ahead and assume that the medicine is Rohypnol and the photographer is the doctor.

Mummy want meds! Rrraaaaghhhh!

Searched for: determined woman

badstockart — Wed, 11 Jan 2012 23:47:00 +0000

Women are made to look like idiots. A lot. It’s kind of the hallmark of advertising. You’d think that would make this image useful. It doesn’t.

Iron Woman

Searched for: diversity

badstockart — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 21:20:52 +0000

My favorite stock photography site claims this is a mixed-race father and daughter. This may well be true, in which case, bless you and your diverse genetic beauty. But, could you put some shirts on and stop having face sex with the camera? Thanks.

Creepy smile for Daddy. Gross.

Searched for: business owner (reader submitted)

badstockart — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 18:50:39 +0000

Technically, the photography isn’t bad – they did a pretty good job with the whole miniature set thing. Her giant head and tiny legs just creeps me the hell out. Also creepy: photographers making children cry for their shot.

Don't cry kid... you only have to work until you're dead.

Thanks to Elyse M. for this creepy little worker bee.

Searched for: thanksgiving

badstockart — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 19:34:15 +0000

This is such a typical distortion of history by the Man: pilgrims didn’t have cell phones!

What do you mean they killed all the indians??