world::girl

Daily Affirmation

2010-10-01T11:36:00.000-07:00

I don't often follow viral YouTube videos - but when a friend showed this one to me, it put a big smile on my face :) Since then I've found myself blurting out my own Jessica-esqe daily affirmations (car rides are my favorite place to do so!)

Here's the video if ya haven't seen it yet...

And here's a little daily affirmation of my own...
Now… my whole life is great. I can do anything good. I like my job, I like everything, I like my housemates, I like my family, I like my car, I like my car club, I like my skirts,
I like my ideas, I like my city
I like my whole community (clap!)
My whole community is great. I can do anything good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I can do anything good.

2010-07-13T21:39:00.000-07:00

I've been working on switching over computers and so looking through the gobs of older pictures (which is always so fun!) And I just love this one, so I thought I'd post it. Taken with my best friend, Kim, after getting my bird tattoo.

Kim does have a tattoo now though, but not on her shoulder. If you're best friends for someone long enough - I guess you do grow together in some ways that you might not have imagined. I like that :)

have yourself a merry little Christmas...

2009-12-22T01:59:00.000-08:00

I always love Christmas time. Maybe I'm still wearing tank-tops in LA - but it's Christmas none-the-less. Below are some picture highlights of my month!

My new roomate, Danielle, and I got all dressed up forties-style to attend "It's A Wonderful Life" shown in the historic downtown "Million-Dollar Theatre". Such a good movie. Such a good time.
Afterwards we got our little tree and decorated it...tree-trimming has always been one of my favorite things.
This past weekend, Kim and I got all dressed up in vintage(the dress I'm wearing was my great-Grandmother's!) and attended the LA City Ballet's "The Nutcraker Swings" at the Orpheum Theatre. The outfits were fantastic...the ballet seemed more like a dance recital. But fun none-the-less.
The next day, Kim and I did our annual Christmas baking. This year we downscaled to 3 recipes. Which sadly enough didn't turn out as good as usual. The gluten-free molasses cookies crumbled to pieces (I'm hoping to salvage this into a cobbler or pie-crust or something) and the toffee is a little bit off. But the fudge turned out yummy. I'm really looking forward to doing some baking with my neices on Christmas Eve!
Other than that I've been busy doing some nesting (finally got pictures hung!) and lots of various crafts. I re-visited pinstripping after awhile and was very pleased with the results. Pleased enough with my skills that I embarked on putting the first stripes on my "pinstripping toolbox!" I've also been doing mending and fixing up old vintage clothes, making little hair things, painting, and getting the beautiful lamps below done!
Aunt Pam gave me these lamp bases from a Montana auction-sale. At the time they were creme colored with some light-blue accents...blah! I painted them gloss black and found these matching newly-made, vintage-styled shades on Ebay for a very reasonable price! The results are splendid...and just the lamps I've always wanted for my family room!

That's it for December! 2010 is looking like it will be quite an interesting year...I really have NO idea what's around the bend...but I'm pretty sure there might be some surprises!

When life give you chocolate chips...

2009-10-09T14:10:00.000-07:00

...make pancakes!
I love food. Particularly breakfast food. Now that I've been gluten-free for a year now (!) I can only indulge in pancakes at home, when they're made from non-wheat flours. So when a girl is in need of a little comfort food, what could make one feel better than chocolate chip pancakes?! Delicious. Why comfort food you ask?? Well, to begin with, keep reading below!

Yes, I am in a new house. Some say its because the house owners were foreclosed upon. Others speculate that our house was being taken over by giant flies, fleas, and cockroaches. (Seriously though, can you believe the size of this fly!? It must have been sleeping, because I was close to touching him and he didn't buzz off!)

It actually isn't a house, its an apartment. My household of 7 people is now going to be an apartment of 2. Which is a slightly odd but welcome change, I think. In the past months my housemates and I have sought to buy something, but that's not working out at the moment. And when we began looking for a rental to hold the 9 of us (we're growing) it was very clear we weren't going to find such a place within the mile of our house that we were looking. So for the time being we're segmenting into 3 households (while continuing to pursue our idea of "intentional community"). We'll begin looking to buy again in the new year.
On other news fronts, I made my first TV filming! It will probably be Februrary when it airs though. It was tons of fun and they loved me! They found my GreaseGirl blog and wanted me to teach a lady how to do some basic car maintenance stuff - like change a tire. We used Studebaker during filming, which makes me very proud. However, when we took her tire off I noticed the inner rim had worn all the way down to the wiry part! No bueno (I'm also attending a spanish class at community college this sememster)! I had sworn to get this checked out first thing the next day - but on my way home from spanish class later that night, a tire blew! Everything was okay. But as I waited for the tow truck on the embankment where the 101 & 110 freeways meet, watching my Stude on a very narrow pull-out, I couldn't help but laugh.
For now, I'm safe and sound. But its good to know that chocolate chip pancakes are always a possibility...

2009-09-03T17:36:00.000-07:00

A little glimpse into things I'm thinking about all the time.
Wouldn't a chiropractor office seem innocent enough?? We need to retrain our eyes so as to not let injustice pass by right in front of us.

2009-08-24T12:32:00.001-07:00

Most of my writing efforts have been siphoned over to GreaseGirl...but I will still post here when I feel like there's something particular I would like to share!

Found this story today at The New York Times on "Truck-Stop Girls". I know I think about this stuff all the time...but lately I've been feeling more of an urge for a "next-step" - whatever that might look like. And the interaction this article describes really strikes my heart...

I asked her what she needed most. “Someplace safe,” she said. “Someplace to be a girl. Someplace where I won’t have to have sex with men anymore.”

I had that. I was given that. I want to make that place...

2009-08-07T08:51:00.000-07:00

Kim has reminded me many times that I need an update...so this won't be long as I currently have Dad's car completely packed for the weekend at Bonneville salt flats for speed week...but I thought I'd at least share a few pictures!
Summer Fun!

Creating...

oops...gotta go...but perhaps you'll hear from me when I'm back from the races!

adventures with Dad

2009-05-21T17:52:00.001-07:00

Last week I had a slight break in my teaching - which was lucky...because my Mom had foot surgury last Monday, and I was able to get away from LA and head to LV to help out Mom while she was confined to bed/wheelchair.
I was really glad to get a little time at home. And of course, Dad and I found some spare time to get away and have a little adventure. I just thought this was going to be an outing to our regular breakfast outing, the Polaris Cafe and then taking a fancy pen Dad had given me that needed fixing to Paradise Pen...but Dad created a little adventure out of it (like he's so good at doing)...with pictures to ensue...thus, here you enjoy the goofy spoils of our adventure :)
Dad and I enjoying breakfast (and the FT paper) at Polaris Cafe.

Can ya find me?! Entering Paradise Pen at the Fashion Show Mall...I haven't been to this mall for years. I used to LOVE malls, but tend to stay away from them now...this one's pretty posh...it even has a runway fashion show...only in Vegas!

Dad buying a little prize in Betsy Johnson...

Browsing one of my favorite home stores, Z Gallerie...

And checking out his newest building project - the Veer Towers at City Center (those two yellow-checkered ones that twist)...

This week it's been back to work - starting up classes at yet another school! One more month of this crazy teaching schedule!...but I sure am looking forward to an extra day off this weekend!

Viva Las Vegas and other happenings!

2009-04-29T00:14:00.000-07:00

It's been a long month since my last post...and I have to admit, this is gonna be a fast one...to make up for it though, I do have lots of pictures!

This past month has been crazy! First getting ready for Viva Las Vegas included sewing and car projects (finishing up my headliner and changing out the transmission). I was also busy preparing at work for a month and a half's worth of classes.

Viva Las Vegas 12 was tons of fun. Stude and I drove out, along with my friend Emil. We made it to Vegas without a hitch! Stude was in her first car show ever and I got to meet up with a bunch of old and new friends alike! I had tons of fun. And also got some great material for articles...which is something else I've been spending lots of time on!

Over at GreaseGirl I've teamed up with another website called MyRideIsMe.com - so all my articles are being put up there too! It's been fun to connect with new people through that site and am excited about helping to build that site up! I've got a list of articles ready to write...and no time to write them!

I also got to spend a little bit of time with the family as I was in Vegas, which was nice. And enjoy a Easter Sunday brunch and time with my parents and nephew Blaise.

After returning home, I was swamped with starting to teach my classes for the pregnancy prevention program. I'll be teaching with that 5 days a week until mid-June. (I normally only teach 1-2 days a week...so this is different for me!) But within that time I have the opportunity to teach 1200 seventh graders! Which I think is awesome, and am willing to put a little work into it ;)

Things are finally calming down a little bit and I'm looking forward to getting a bit more sleep, hanging out with friends a bit more, and of course surfing!

enJOYment

2009-03-17T23:02:00.001-07:00

It ended up being quite a lovely weekend. Despite the fact that I couldn't muster up the needed energy to dive into one of the various projects I would have liked to. Once I succumbed to the fact that I needed rest...it was quite nice. So on Saturday after a CPR class, a much-needed bi-car washing, and a failed attempt at pinstripping - I retreated with a favorite author to one of my favorite little restaurants. Philip Marlowe at Masa Cafe on Sunset...great noir-ish detective story, leek soup, and a drop in by my friend Ann, what more could a girl ask for on a Saturday evening!?

Sunday was quite equally great. An easy morning followed by a trip out to the Hollywood Farmers Market. Produce buying and people watching there is fantastic - but I was really going for the Petrovijic Blasting Company in the good company of my friend Emil. I first saw the Petrovijic Blasting Company play on my birthday, and it was delightful to enjoy their unique blend of parisian jazz/circus/i don't know what else music once again! I headed home from that for "house church". Which is something my housemates and I hold once a month - people come over and we worship some and talk about something. This was our third "church" and we talked about what the Bible says about the environment...it was great! Thank God for his creation...even though we do have to care for it...even when the "it" might be our tired bodies - Thank God that joy can come through the caring-for too!

it's complicated...

2009-03-07T13:11:00.000-08:00

I'm not saying life is complicated - but rather...things, situations, and people are complicated. And when I think about it, I'm thankful for that...although sometimes in the moment frustration gets the best of me.

It's complicated that as I'm driving home across downtown "When You Wish Upon A Star" comes on as I'm passing through Skid Row. Those not familiar with LA's skid row...the homeless services are all centered in one area - thus so are the homeless people. There's lots of shelters, services, etc all within a few blocks square. During the day, these streets are lined with tons of people hanging out. At night they're lined with tents.

Somehow the words don't fit "When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires will come to you. If your heart is in your dreams, no request is to extreme." Although I realize these words are from a fairy tale and don't truly work for real life, they seem to work even less for the people who inhabit the sidewalks of Skid Row. I would consider myself a hopeful person...some people might even say a dreamer or at the least an idealist. And I have a life where the cards are pretty much in my favor. Yet there are times, situations, where I sometimes lose hope. I can only imagine how hard it is to keep hope when the only home you have is on the sidewalk.

Life right now for me is very busy. This too is complicated. I love everything I'm doing. I feel invigorated. And sometimes I feel like disappearing for a few days. I still haven't reconciled those feelings of excitedness and exhaustion. Of courage to go out into unknown territory and wanting to slink back into my safe little shell. Of putting myself on the line and staying on flat land. Of paddling out into the ocean against the waves or staying on shore.

I think the tension, the complexity, of these feelings is normal. And in a sense, good in fact. Because I don't want to just stay safe. I want to live the life that really is life. Even if that means failing. Even if it means enjoying the most fantastic weekend only to be left with a sunburn and stolen wetsuit.

Recently I came across this quote and want to shout it out amongst the world.

All power and joy to that man who can say, 'today, in this day, I have lived'; tomorrow may bring rain or sun, but nothing can undo, or render worthless, what the fleeting, unrepeatable hour has brought." -Horace

what have I been up to?!?

2009-02-19T00:17:00.000-08:00

It's been very weathery in LA lately. Mind you, not in regards to the rest of the country. But the weather just can't decide. One day its in the 80s and the next its super cold. AND rainy! Oh...I'm not complaining...I'm just bitter about the rain because it means I can't surf. So between the winter storms rousing up waves too big for me and the rain - I've only gotten one good day of surfing in this entire month! It was a fantastic day...my old pal Anthony is in town from Hawaii, so we got to surf together for the first time which was awesome. And a new pal came along, a vintage girl like myself, Chryss. New friends, old friends...good times.

Of weather, there was one night that our power went out. I had made the most delicious home-made non-gluten pizza (the only kind I can have now) and was planning on taking it easy with a movie. But instead, I ended sitting around the table chatting with my roomates in candlelight...which was good as well! I really like this pic I took from there...

Today I purchased my glitter vinyl for the Stude! VERY exciting! I shouldn't have bought it before the transmission...but the store had 20% off. And Viva Las Vegas is approaching quickly...only 6 weeks away! I've gotta have the Stude in top order, as this will be her first official show. I think a new friend and I are gonna girls car afternoon followed by an evening of rockabilly in a couple weeks...something to look forward to!

cooking and other goodness

2009-01-22T11:16:00.000-08:00

It's been a busy start to the new year! Along with revitalizing this blog - I've also created a new one for me and my Stude! You can find it at www.greasegirl.wordpress.com! I hope to begin to connect with more people in the hot rod community and have a venue to post articles with beginner car knowledge...it's been fun so far and I've gotten lots of good responses!

I've also been back to work creating some art. I finally finished the painting begun for Kim's 30th birthday. As well as beginning to work out some of the figures for a new painting. Which reminds me...I'm wanting to expand my "blue boy" painting to a whole series of kids. If you have any great photographs of a childs face...I'd love to have it - the idea is to have kids from around the globe, with stories to go along. I also finally got some pinstripping laid down on the bottom of my skateboard. To see this stuff, visit :create:, my artblog. (Click on :create: to be redirected).

The skateboard finally got done, because I was creating an example design for what may be a budding business amongst 3 of my neighbor kids. A friend gave them a "seed" of 6 skateboard decks in which to start a little business with. It was fun going to my friend's, John from InnerCHANGE, office and having him talk to the kids about business, money, and what not. We also made another trip to a skate shop (Non-Factory) to get grip tape. The guy working there was super nice and gave the kids a great lesson on how to apply grip tape to the board. After that we came back to the house and everybody took turns putting a sheet on a board. All of our fingers were all rough and sandpapery after that! At the moment the kids are a little discouraged because they're not finding buyers as fast as they thought they would. We'll see...even if nothing else happens it's already been a really good experience.

This past Sunday, my community had its first ever Sunday gathering. Much like church, but in the home. It was really fantastic! Some friends came - we sang, took communion, talked about grace. Since it was the day before MLK - I was happy to be able to focus on that a little with others. I'd been realizing last week how much grace exists in hope and in the ability to pursue one's dreams. So each person read a segment of MLK's I Have A Dream speech - which was so cool for me to hear a collective group of people read. I love hearing the voice of Martin Luther King Jr., but hearing the voice of my community say those words was pretty cool.

Sunday evening I went and saw the movie Slumdog Millionaire, after a bunch of people told me I should go see it. SUCH a good movie! I went in having no idea of what it was about...which is how I suggest it. Enough to know is...it's a story, it portrays some realities, and it's hopeful but not easy. Highly recommended! After the movie I was lucky enough to go swing dancing. The Derby, of long-standing placement, is going to be closing it's doors at the end of this month. The building is a historical spot, so it will eventually reopen again - I hope with better owners who can really bring the original feeling of the club back.

On Tuesday I was super excited about the inauguration of President Obama. I couldn't help but shed some tears during the proceedings. I hadn't been gung-ho for Obama from the beginning. I actually didn't decide who I would vote for until about September. But since then, it's been really exciting to see people excited again about the President. Especially when its, for example, impoverished kids from Watts. I thought his speech was fantastic - hopefully an indication of his handling of his office. I felt he was able to lay out the seriousness of the situation that we're in while at the same time reinforcing ideals and instilling not only hope but action.

One thing that really struck me as I watched everything was how much all of the individuals on that podium seemed like family. Not that I'm naive to think all of those relationships are rosy. But it is something unique about America I think. That all of our past living leaders can stand together. The ideal closeness and intimacy of the American family is quite unique.

And lastly...I haven't been too shutter-happy lately, so there's not many photos to share. I thought I'd share my very impressive baking project of non-gluten bread. Since I stopped eating gluten in September, one of the things I've craved most is just a regular old sandwich. (I do have sliced bread which works really well for toast, but not so much for sandwiches.) So this was my first trial of non-gluten yeast bread...and it's post-creation, a delicious BLT. Oh...and then below is the pictures from December I failed to post...Kim and I's holiday cookie-baking extravaganza!

New look! New look! New look!

2009-01-08T19:06:00.000-08:00

Sometimes things need to be updated...so wah-lah...the new look for my old blog. No, you have not navigated to the wrong page...it's still me. My hair is still red, but my blog is no longer blue.

1 day

2009-01-07T16:58:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a very interesting day…so I wanted to share it with you all.

It began as a nice, normal day. I made rice pudding for breakfast, which was a delicious treat.
Soon I headed out to work, meeting a colleague to do some trafficking outreach together. He wanted to go check on an 18-year-old Central American he’d met before the holidays who had said that he just wants to go back home. He had got into the US illegally and is finding that work is hard to come by. The worker center at Home Depot said only about 5% of the guys who show up get work these days. Some guys show up every day, all day and don’t get work for weeks.

This young Central American led us to an appointment at the his consulate, where we actually got a meeting with the Consulate General. I had no idea we were meeting with someone of her position, and was fumbling around to use my Spanish properly. She was a lovely woman however, and I think possibly may be able to help our young friend somehow. It was very interesting to hear her viewpoints on things such as immigration and human trafficking.

From there we dropped our young friend off and began making some rounds of lofts around downtown. Over the past 5 or so years, downtown has been going under mass revitalization and is now quite the place to be. In fact, there’s a huge Ritz-Carlton residence building going in right now (that looks quite odd if you ask me.) From the neighborhoods I dwell in, the world of luxury loft buildings is quite an odd one. For the most part, concierges seemed quite interested that we wanted to offer training on human trafficking to their occupants. I say give me the color of my neighborhood over the fabricated hipness of luxury loft living any day.

Some more errands and work occupied the rest of the afternoon until it was time to run out to Little Tokyo to pick up some miso paste. I’m planning on making miso soup from scratch tonight – something I’ve always wanted to do. Going into a Japanese grocery is such a shock! I know there’s every little ethnic neighborhood in this town – and I’m in them often – but there’s just something about going into the Japanese and Korean grocery stores that gives me the jeebies. I’m the only non-Asian person in there, everything is so clean and stark, labeling is all in letters I can’t read, and people look at me weird! Globetrotting all within 5 miles of my house!

Anyhow – I found the miso, which was very exciting. And I also enjoyed taking out the Stude. The transmission is going awry and I haven’t driven her since Christmas. It felt very nice to chug down the road again makin some noise!

To end the night off, Kacie, an in-town friend who lives out-of-town currently was in-town. She’s one of the few swing dancers I’m friends with – so of course, we went out dancing together. We drove the Stude up to Joe’s, a little pub sort of place with a live band and swing night on Tuesdays. This place has one of the most interesting mix of characters. From the older guy, who looks very Irish and must be a bar regular, walking in a sitting down at a table alone all night, with no drink, just taking in the sights. To David, a theatre writer who is very…theatrical. To a host of different swing dance characters, old skool and not, good and not, funny and not. The music was good, the people were good, the dancing was good. Great.

The day isn’t over quite yet. After Joes we hear Skinny’s is the place to go. Skinny’s has a West Coast Swing lesson earlier in the evening and people dance there until 2am. (For those who aren’t hep to swing…I dance East Coast/Lindy Hop which is very different then West Coast. Technically Lindy is the same steps as West Coast, but just arranged very differently). So we pull up to Skinnys, the Stude get’s a front door parking spot (which I love…and even more so when I glide on in parallel parking like a pro!) Skinny’s is an upscale, club-ish atmosphere. Club music is thumping through their fancy sound system. There are West Coast dancers on the floor getting their groove on. Same steps as I dance…completely different vibe. Kacie and I likened it to what “parents did in the early 90s when they went out.” It was like they were out dancing at a club but were doing crazy complex dance steps. As sexy as Salsa but with a different vibe.

Very interesting. That was my day. One interesting of many. I’m rarely in want of wonder, which I’m thankful for.

"mantrap"

2008-12-10T23:44:00.000-08:00

Recently I've been doing some teaching at a couple of schools down in Watts. Each week as I leave one, I see on the corner "MANTRAP NAILS". I couldn't believe my eyes the first time I saw it - brilliant name. And what I imagined must be inside was a very 70s chic interior plastered with mirrors and laminate with lots of up-do'ed women getting very gawdy nails done.

Today was my second to last class at that school....and as a treat and for a laugh, I decided to venture into Mantrap Nails myself. I was under-whelmed by the empty-ness and bleak interior, I must admit. But for all of my under-whelmedness...I have to say it was partially overcome with an amusing and very nice fellow who did my nails as well as getting told from both he and a customer that I looked like a 50s model :) Hehe...it's amazing what a complement can do!

Since I was at Mantrap I decided that I had to diverge from my strict rule of only painting my nails red. I mostly let my nail-man pick the color and design. I was thinking even a more striking design...on all of my fingers...like many of my students do...but what came to be was this. A very hot metallic pink with a tasteful stripping on my ring-fingers. It's quite nice. But I think it would be a brilliant project to overhaul the Mantrap Nail Salon into what could be its full glory!

"Going to church does not make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a car."

2008-12-08T22:54:00.001-08:00

I've been spending alot of time in garage's lately...and I'm not a car yet. But I am getting to know them better! About a month ago I had stopped by my Studebaker shop and the guys and I were shooting the breeze when Bill pipes up and says why don't I come work at the shop. I wasn't sure if he was kidding or not - but I told him I'd be really excited to do that 1 day a week. He was serious - and thought they'd have lots there for me to help with.

I don't think I could do it 5 days a week, but 1 is fantastic! It's the perfect mix of physical, artistic, and problem-solving! The way my 4-5 different jobs have pieced themselves together in my life blows me away. It's pretty amazing that a number of months back I was thinking of switching jobs. I'm really happy in ALL of my jobs right now - and never could have imagined piecing this together on my own. It's pretty rad how things work out sometimes!

So far I've done a number of little odd jobs. Some re-wiring. And today I learned how to take off/take apart drum brakes (and then wire-brushed them nice and clean). I'm learning much and having fun. Most people who come through the shop I've already met, because they drop in on a regular basis. However there has been a couple people who were really surprised by a girl working there. Like the two young ladies who came in and exclaimed "A girl works here!...cooool!" or the weird guy missing his front tooth who just sort of oogled at me. It makes me chuckle. Just like I can't help but chuckle when I roll down my block and the rumble of my Stude's engine sets off a car alarm - I loooove that. Ahhh...simple pleasures.

Which reminds me of Thanksgiving (simple pleasures that is!) I was quite worried to drive the Stude to Bakersfield where I was meeting my parents on our way to Sacramento. (Stude is having some transmission issues). But she made it. The drive was very nice - being in an old car just slows down the pace a bit. Arriving in the country felt really good - the slight fogginess, the cold, the fields....I kinda just wanted to keep driving around as it makes for good reflection time. But...as it ends up, I met up with a friend, and then with my parents and Blaise, and from there we safely got to Sacramento and enjoyed the weekend with family. The kids are at crazy ages (2,3,4) so you can imagine it wasn't exactly a relaxing weekend. But was wonderful to be with family. Enjoy the pictures...which for the most part were taken by Trey(also included are a few Christmas tree ones :) )

sundays are nice

2008-12-07T23:28:00.000-08:00

I recognize it's been a long time since my last post...the 30s are busy! While I can't sit down and catch you all up on the last month - I thought I'd start with today.

Waking up late to an empty house (a treat when one lives with 6 others) I decided to make delicously bread-like non-gluten blueberry pancakes. Although I was worried that I'd used a bad egg in the batter, everything turned out fine and I even had hot maple syrup - yum. I stuffed myself while enjoying the Christmas tree and a really good book. (The Razor's Edge by Someset Maugham...a regular at the cafe recommended this writer based on my other likings...and as I've found it hard recently to find good fiction its been great finding some.)
Skipping some things in between...I met a friend for a drink before heading off together to an Over The Rhine concert. My friend had seen them about a dozen times, and I never have although I have multiple CDs. It was such a good show. Really fabulous music and really fabulous lyrics. Leaving the show my friend and I were both really reflective and split. I enjoyed a short walk and the park while writing the following poem...

The lights are low
music and beauty around the room
I sit comfortable in my chair
my arms hugging my bent leg.
One quick moment I'm struck
by my ease and routine
of providing my own needs
this both pleases and distresses me
full, I don't look for food
but who wants to be hungry?

I know, nothing like OTR's songwriting. Lyrics sticking out to me from tonight are from Drunkard's Prayer..."you're my water, you're my wine, you're my whiskey from time to time."

I must end my weekend - for tomorrow morning I must be at the Studebaker Shop bright and early...perhaps I can write about that tomorrow...

thirty years old!

2008-10-26T23:24:00.000-07:00

I'm just finishing the celebration of my birthday weekend- the big 3-0! I've been nothing but excited to turn 30, and was a little put off by the Maitre'D commenting on how now I'll have to lie that I'm 29...as if that's where a woman would want to stay - hah! As fabulous as the 20s were, I am looking forward to my 30s. Whatever is in store for the next 10 years!?!

The first half of Saturday I spent doing things I like to do around the house (reading the FT, lollygagging, crafting) and then I went up to the Griffith Observatory in Griffith Park. This had been closed down for 4 years undergoing renovation, but has been re-opened for nearly 2 and I hadn't make a trip up there yet. I instantly fell in love with it. From the fantastic drive up there to the views to the old-school-ness of it. A really fabulous place to hang out for awhile. I appreciated the perspective it gave me of my own incredible smallness in this vast universe of ours.

In the evening I celebrated with dinner and frivolity at The Dresden I hadn't had a "party" in years and years, and it was really fun to have so many people I know and love gathered in one place! It was a truely fabulous time and I'm thankful to have so many great people in my life.

On Sunday I didn't feel like doing anything too spectacular...just things I liked. So Kim and I moseyed on down to the Hollywood Farmer's Market. Where there happened to be 2 guys by the name of The Petrojvic Blasting Co. playing music that really did help make my day. They basically were most always playing 2 instruments at a time, some combination of drums, accordian, trumpet, trombone, tamborine, and singing of course. Their music was delightful and cemented the day early on as fantastic. After that we spent some time combing the music archives of Amoeba (where Kim bought her 1st CD ever and I bought a 45 record whose song title will be my mantra this year..."ace in the hole"). Then came back home for hanging out, making non-wheat chocolate chip cookies, and so forth.

All-in-all a very successful birthday weekend. Thanks to all of those in my life that make me feel so loved! Mmmuuuuuaaaaaahhhhh!

For a complete look at photos...click here for my facebook birthday album

What does it mean to love?

2008-10-21T16:44:00.000-07:00

While the rest of the world is concerned with financial stability, baseball, elections, or what be it – I find myself engrossed in an (arguably) more sober topic. Violence. Not towards me, to put loved ones at peace. But around me. Somehow in the past week I’ve crossed paths with quite dramatic violence a handful of times. Combine this with an unintended conversation on what the Bible says about war – and you have the ingredients that necessitate much mulling over and pondering.

The snowball of violence began slowly rolling in when my friend Chris emailed prayer letters from Guatemala. He was there doing work among imprisoned gang members. His talk of both the violence and the hope experienced have primed my outlook on the following encounters.

A very interesting conversation about gangs with young men at the continuation school I've been teaching at.

A disturbing conversation with a 16-year-old pregnant student. She looks to be 5-6 months along and it somehow offhandedly came up in class that her “babies daddy” (aka: Father of her child) was shot and killed recently by a gang-related incident. I don’t know which concerns me more – the fact that he was killed or that her remark was so flippant and un-emotive…like that’s just what happens.

Two friends-of-friends were violently killed last Saturday. I’ll spare you the details.

One of the men killed is named John McGrahm. (click here for LA Times article) He was a homeless man who had been sitting on the same corner in Koreatown for years. Apparently he had piercing blue eyes and was a known and gentle presence in the neighborhood he inhabited. My friend Jonathan used to live nearby him and when he heard about what went down, he wanted a way to memorialize and celebrate John’s life. Jonathan created a poster using a portrait of John along with the letters RUOK (read: Are You Okay).

Making wheatpaste and heading out with Jonathan late Sunday night seemed like a burden when I could have easily been in bed sleeping. But it ended up being a solemn and hopeful activity that I feel privileged to have taken part in. As I read notes left at the shrine erected on the sidewalk dwelling place that was John’s, an awe and confusion filled me. Awe because we so seldom express our regard for one another’s humanity…but somehow this awe that’s in all of us somewhere gushes out when a human life is lost. Confusion because some of the messages left seemed awfully at odds with each other. Compassion for a life lost, prayers for peace, and regret for not expressing more love while John lived—in contrast to calls for justice and violence to whoever perpetrated the crime.

Which makes the poster seem like a succinct statement in response. Seeing John’s face will be a reminder of peace and kindness to those who miss him as well as a bitter reminder of humanity destroyed to those involved in the crime.

I have a hope that violence is almost never aimed at destroying humanity. As I talked with the young men at the continuation school about gangs, we came up with the realization that aggression isn’t based against a person, against a human being. Aggression shown by gangs is against where you’re from or who you’re associated with. While it pains my heart that such violence is created because of things outside of personal control, it also grows hope in me that man, humanity, is a much harder target to aim disrespect at.

So what is my place in shedding light on the humanity of different human beings that may have been forgotten as human? In war we no longer have to see the eyes of the person we kill. In business we no longer have connections to the person we rob. In our lives we no longer have much contact with the disinherited, disenfranchised, damned, different.

In the Bible we see two contrasts. The Old Testament with God standing behind armies and the New Testament with Christ disappointing the Jews waiting for a triumphal, conquering Messiah. It’s quite easy for me to say I’ll certainly never go into the military. But can I say that I’m ready for our whole military to stop working? Am I ready for the repercussions of treating each and every human being on earth as a unique, distinct creation of God worthy of love and having their basic needs met?

I feel like until I can answer those questions it’s somewhat extraneous to figure out for myself the Biblical stance on war. Christ took God’s laws and cut to the heart of them. The heart of God is love. Which is why I’m so thankful for grace – because I know I will never love perfectly. But for now I feel reawakened to ask my self some difficult questions about what it means to love. But for now I feel reawakened to ask some difficult questions of myself about what it means to love. To love in people and places around me. To keep my eyes, ears, and heart open to the undercurrents running beneath day-to-day happenings and people’s facades.

What does it mean to love?

2008-10-01T14:21:00.000-07:00

Today began the first day of my teaching classes since last January. It was splendid! The classes I taught today are being held at a continuation high school in Watts. I usually begin my first class with a little get-to-know-you game. Students pick two cards, each with a question. They then choose one question to answer themselves and one to ask me.

A put-together young lady in the back row, looking to be in 11th or 12th grade, read her first card, “If you spend a week doing whatever you wanted, what would it be?” She said that if she were 21 she would spend the week clubbing, because she really like dancing. When I asked if she would stay in Los Angeles or go somewhere else to do this, she thought for a moment and replied, “Well maybe like Inglewood, Carson, or Long Beach.”

For those of you who aren’t from the LA area – all of these places are 5 to 15miles away from Watts! Given the opportunity to go anywhere and do anything…she chooses to stay very close to her small world.

One could read this and conclude that this young lady must really love her home. Unfortunately, I don’t think her answer is so heartwarming. Although kids from the inner city live in and near places where worlds meet and diversity abounds – they themselves are usually drastically confined to their own personal complexes walled within their neighborhoods. Sometimes to extents that may cause disbelief. Such as a kid from MacArthur Park never having been to the beach (merely 15 miles away.) Almost like living at the base of the Alps and never having seen snow!

The smallness of their worlds worries me. How can one dream of a world of opportunity when one isn’t even able to dream of venturing out of one’s own town? I have a feeling my challenge is cut out for me…to open the door of opportunity and encourage these students to dream of making life and sexual choices different then the oppressive and unhealthy situations they have been forced to grow up amongst.

A Dream Deferred
by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun?

Or fester like a sore--

And then run?

Does it stink like rotten meat?

Or crust and sugar over--

like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags

like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

things i like...

2008-09-15T12:16:00.000-07:00

Celebrating my best friend's 30th birthday (mine is coming up soon) and looking forward to this new decade in life

Getting my iTunes to run off a new external hard drive. And surpisingly simple to do at that, thanks to help from this ilounge article. I now have 16.2 GB free on my whooping 27.9 GB laptop hard drive...a huge increase from the mere MB's available to me just a few days ago (although the purchase of this external hard drive had to take precedence over the purchase of a wetsuit...which I'll be needing to surf with quite soon)...which leads me to...

A welcoming hint of fall in the air - I think September thru December could be labeled as my favorite string of months.

Living in intentional community, there's nothing quite like it. (I promise we're not as stoic as we were trying to look in this picture!)

Car alarms set off by my Studebaker driving by! Heehee...it just makes me a little proud.

Coffee in the morning, especially when its the weekend and my Financial Times has been delivered. (Yes, I read the FT (only the weekend edition) - a fantastic paper if you haven't read it before - and based out of London, so unfortunately I trust it more. I read it not because I care greatly about finances...but rather, it provides a good overview of world news, great editorial pieces, and always an interesting story on art/culture/politics/etc.) In fact...look for a soon-to-be new sidebar with vocabulary words I like - most usually found while reading FT. By the way, did you see the new recipe section on sidebar to your right? I've been enjoying some cooking as of late - really all sorts of domestic things. I've been on a gluten-free diet for the past month. I'm feeling much better than I was, and it surprisingly isn't that hard to follow...especially with brown rice bread and the delicous non-wheat cupcakes I made on saturday!

Liking my job again. Sex education...some body's gotta do it - and I feel privileged to at the moment.

Going out for special girl time with Shirley and Adia to see Sleeping Beauty play at El Capitan theater. Way to make a movie into an event!

pink

2008-09-10T23:31:00.001-07:00

Being quite the girly-girl, pink has always been a present color (though never a primary one). Just a few weeks ago, I had a overwhelming urge to wear something pink. And when I say “pink,” I mean that sugery-sweet cotton-candy color of soft pink. But I was shocked when I turned to a completely lacking closet. Who pulled the plug and drained all of the pink from my closet?! Despite the frilly skirts, puffy sleeves, and silk shirts that abound in my wardrobe—it’s as if the absence of pink is a ding to my femininity.

Being the youngest of four and the only girl, I’ve been swaddled in pinks from the day I was born. From the hot pink tu-tu for my tap dancing recital to the elegant blush-colored easter dress—pink has always been en vogue in my fashion book. However, its been a surprising 10 years since I last recall purchasing a pink clothing piece…it was a short-sleeved angora sweater since lost from my collection. One day while wearing said sweater my grandfather commented on how pretty I looked. It was an out-of-the-blue sort of compliment, the kind that gets to you the most. It wouldn’t have surprised me if I went on wearing pink every day just because of it.

So the moment I noticed the pink flight in my closet, I promptly set out to rectify the situation. Much to my dismay, I’ve been completely unsuccessful. Sure, I’m sorely lacking in finances and so I’ve been relegated to the very inexpensive LA street-side shops…but surely there are other gals out there who also want pink?! Are we that limited to the color trends that when a girl is searching for the perfect pink blouse, there’s not one to be found?

Of course, I have found some pink-ish articles of clothing. The $3 bargain ribbed tank in either barely-there pink or fuschia. The light pink polo shirt. And a number of loud, look-at-me pinks that simply don’t begin to fit the bill. What I’m looking for is the understated, makes-you-feel –like-a-woman-the-minute-you-put-it-on sort of pink clothing…not too white of a pink and not too bright of a pink.

Searching Ebay for “pink” under women’s clothing returned gauds of lingerie, Victoria Secret branded “Pink,” and a varied assortment of fashion disasters. I had a momentary spark of hope when I remembered Betsey Johnson – her stores are clad in pink, surely she must have something. Turnign to Ebay once again, I was disappointed. While there was one gorgeous Betsey Johnson party dress and another lovely blouse…neither were in my size (nor my budget).

So what’s a girl to do? I think I have no choice but to dive even deeper into the feminine and pull out my sewing machine. When the world doesn’t present me with the choices that I care to choose from, I’m always glad to be able to choose my own way. And hopefully, with a quick trip to the fabric district and an afternoon with my faithful machine – I’ll be frolicking on a hillside out in the blue yonder….wearing nothing but fabulous PINK!

<<<*P.S.*>>> I did take to my machine…but ended up sewing a dress in blue. The dress fit so fantastically I decided to make a skirt in the same pattern, using a fabulous piece of material I’d been saving. It’s a woven wool with both pink and black threads. I’m particularly proud of this article as I took the extra effort to finish off the inner seams with a Hong Kong finish, using the most fabulous color of pink silk (of which I also added a pleat panel with). And if this weren’t enough…I finally found a bargain of a shirt quite unexpectedly…which I think fits the bill quite nice. It’s good to be back in pink again!

Baby Borrowers

2008-08-26T13:15:00.000-07:00

I’ve been following the show The Baby Borrowers for work purposes and have just been exploring the NBC website for the show. On the message board was a post regarding the teens sleeping in the same beds. I’m astounded, saddened, and frustrated after reading the posts.
For those who haven’t seen it, The Baby Borrowers is a reality show that put teen couples in an adult situation for a few weeks and gave them a taste of what it would be like to care for a baby. Said message board post began with a woman “disgusted” by airing of teens sleeping together and who turned the show off as soon as she saw the teen couples in the same beds. People bantered back and forth on two extremes for 7 pages of posts. Very, very few took anywhere near a logical stance. On one extreme were people talking about “fornication” and sin while the other extreme berated them for having any opinion on the issue and told them to get realistic or turn their TVs off.

Where do I start? First, a word about “Entertainment.” Many posts noted that this was just “entertainment” so “should stop complaining.” Being entertained is the golden chalice of our current society—what we’re continually seeking. Entertainment, albeit created for our enjoyment, carries within it intrinsic values, messages, and meanings. Too many people are fooled that what they’re watching on TV is having no effect on how one lives out their life. Marketing is just one small proof of this.

And on to the main subject, sleeping in the same bed. I think of two main points not being understood here. A failure to see the reality of how teens are integrating sexuality into their lives and an enormous lack of understanding as to the qualities which make a marriage successful and lasting.

Teens are integrating sexuality the way they’ve seen it modeled for them by those in their lives and the society at large. What does this mean? Largely….Failed relationships. Betrayed trusts and intimacies. Seeking to fill ones needs and desires.

And why so much bad modeling? Perhaps it leads from a lack of understanding as to the qualities which make a marriage successful and lasting. Sacrificing of oneself and commitment. No marriage will last without these. People arguing for living together before marriage because you get to “see what they’re really like” are missing the point. There are no guarantees with people. Even if you did completely know everything about them before “I do” doesn’t mean that they might not shift tremendously sometime down the road. Yes…spend plenty of time and energy in getting to know the person you’re marrying – in all sorts of aspects. But when that time comes to decide about marrying that person—you must decide if you want to commit to them for better or worse. To fully give of yourself to build a marriage and make it work. I’ve never heard anyone say marriage is easy. But those I know with the longest and best marriages say that every bit of work they’ve put into their marriage has been worth the effort.

In my job seeking to reduce teen pregnancies I get to hear all the arguments about what and how we should teach our teens about sex. Our society’s polarity surrounding sexual topics detracts from beginning a helpful conversation. We could give teens the best “sexual” educations possible—but will be, I think, missing the point if we fail to instruct them on what marriage is truly about and what it takes to make marriage work. And our society will continue to be full of hurting individuals until we learn that the most precious things in life come with a cost. Love is one of those things that require you to give it away in order to really get it.

"Justice is what love looks like in public" -Cornell West

2008-07-29T20:52:00.001-07:00

Hey all! This is a great opportunity to learn more about human trafficking and get a chance to respond! Check it out!