Thoughts on leadership and the power of communication.

A World That Can't Stop Talking

Thu, 18 Apr 2013 12:51:00 GMT

Charles Schwab, Bill Gates, Lou Gerstner, Brenda Barnes - what do these CEOs have in common? According to Harvard Business School Professor Quinn Mills, an expert on leadership behaviors, their personality profiles classify them as introverts. Quiet CEOs may not be obvious - they can be quite comfortable on stage or socializing with colleagues and friends. The introvert test is that they don't get their energy from other people. They leave the party early and recharge by retreating to their offices or studies, spending their favorite time reading or thinking.

I haven't been able to put down the hot new book Quiet, The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. Author Susan Cain makes a compelling case for the power of the introverted leader. A masterful storyteller, Cain also convincingly shares example after example of how brilliant people can be overlooked and over-talked by extroverts. In American business, where we value the gregarious individual, this has consequences. She chronicles the history of how we came to favor the outgoing personality, and what companies must do to avoid always capitulating to the leader or team that is quicker to put forth an idea and able to argue until they win the debate.

Cain also cites the work of Gregory Berns, a Harvard Business professor and expert on leadership traits. Berns explains the consequences for companies that rely too heavily on presentation skills to weed out good ideas. He shares examples of companies that try to solve it - like a software company which set up an online idea exchange so good ideas wouldn't be squashed by the conversational dynamics of the typical extrovert-oriented brainstorming session.

It may seem odd to read a blog that praises the introverted leader, written by the CEO of a communication strategy firm. First, I must tell you that by Cain's definition, I am clearly an introvert. Perhaps that's why our courses on executive presence have always focused on substance first, style second. While companies call us to help their leaders develop greater executive presence, we have always believed our job is to help the smart, but not necessarily outgoing leader become more influential by giving voice to substantive ideas and making their case.

Yes, leaders who are introverts must learn to be effective on a big stage, or in boardroom. It's just the reality of succeeding in our extrovert culture. They also have to express clear and compelling ideas in their written communications. That isn't what they teach you in engineering school, or finance school, or the laboratory.

There is so much to learn on this topic. Check out Quiet, whether you suspect you are an introvert, or know without a doubt you have Extrovert stamped on your forehead with a capital E. It will provoke your thinking about why we need to make sure the I's and the E's in our organizations learn to talk, and listen, to each other.

A Cup of Observation: Innovation Strategies

Tue, 16 Apr 2013 14:27:00 GMT

Do you ever wonder how game changing business ideas like Starbucks are born? You may have heard the story behind it; if not, it highlights a great lesson about how innovative leaders turn flashes of brilliance into global enterprises.

The way CEO Howard Schultz tells it, he was working as the marketing guy at this little Seattle store where they sold imported coffee beans. He loved the business and loved the coffee, but they only sold the beans in bags. The owners thought great coffee should be ground and roasted at home for the perfect experience. Schultz wanted to start up a little counter in the back of the store where you could buy a single cup of coffee. The owners were not impressed with that idea.

But Schultz couldn't let it go. So, he traveled to Italy to observe the classic Italian cafe experience. He figured that Europeans had been sitting at little tables, enjoying good coffee and conversation for centuries. (Assuming, they must know something about it!)

He visited 500 of these cafes, watching how baristas stood behind the counter, grinding the beans, steaming the milk, pouring each cup of dark espresso or foaming cappuccino. He came back to the US utterly convinced that he had seen the future. He cajoled the owners again to let him try. They resisted, for a long time. Ultimately, Schultz was so convinced and so passionate, he persuaded them. The rest is history. His idea launched an industry.

Schultz has, in spades, at least two of the traits truly innovative leaders exhibit -- a keen ability to observe and see a pattern, and the courage to communicate it to influence hearts and minds. While you might assume the creative, influential leader's skills are in their DNA, research says otherwise. A famous study of twins revealed that up to two-thirds of innovation skills can be learned.

What does this mean when it comes to coaching leaders to drive innovation? After working with great leaders and hanging around the periphery of the leadership development world for a while now, I don't think we do nearly enough to identify and develop these skills in leaders. We don't pay enough attention to the people who have this ability to observe, see a pattern, and translate it into an idea.

We need to coach the executives who need to lead innovation to encourage quieter people to give voice to their ideas. Too often, we allow the loudest voice in the room to prevail. How many game-changing ideas in your company have been drowned out by the cacophony of dominant personalities? Every leader needs to master the art of facilitating meetings and creating environments where ideas are heard and nurtured.

Flophouse Opportunities- The Power of Observation in Leading Innovation

Fri, 12 Apr 2013 14:09:00 GMT

Sometimes, as the saying goes, opportunity comes along, dressed in overalls, disguised as work. Such was the case back in 1919, when Conrad Hilton went seeking fortune in Cisco, Texas. The 31-year old intended to buy the town bank, but when he arrived for the meeting, the owner upped the previously agreed-upon price. Hilton said no thanks, and huffed off down the road searching for a night's lodging. When he arrived at the only place in town, a flophouse, he couldn't get in the front door. Exhausted oil field workers were lined up, renting rooms in eight hour shifts, some with their heads down on the dining room table, or slumped in chairs in the lobby.

Hilton approached the owner, Henry Mobley, and learned he was weary of the business and ready to sell. Hilton offered $40,000, half of what he'd planned to pay for the bank. The deal struck, he pivoted and spent the next four years of his life schooling himself in the inn-keeping business. As he toiled away, he dreamed of building a chain of hotels; a dream that would eventually take flight, manifesting into a global hotel empire, which became the gold standard in the industry.

I am indebted to, and have stolen liberally from, travel writer Carlton Stowers, who tells this story in American Way magazine. Above is a photo which makes it evident that this guy had vision. The flophouse was a modest, two-story boxy brick industrial building, resembling a 1930's factory or a 1950's school. The Mobley Hotel, now a museum, in no way resembles the modern Hilton Hotel of today.

What struck me about Hilton's story is the vision. It is a timeless story. A guy with a little imagination and a modicum of courage turns disappointment into opportunity.

Leaders you admire, especially in these challenging times, often have this quality. They have a plan, but they acknowledge that things can change. So, they keep their eyes wide open. If things don't work out, they look around. And when they see it, they take that proverbial leap of faith, knowing they could fail, but believing they can and will succeed.

A couple of weeks ago, I had the opportunity to present a new program on "Coaching for Innovation." The research we found in preparing for the program shows that one of the qualities innovative leaders have in spades is the power of observation. Innovative leaders have their eyes and ears wide open. They exhibit a genuine curiosity. This leads to insights others don't have.

The good news is, two-thirds of innovative leadership skills can be learned. You can train yourself to stop and open your eyes. One secret is to read widely, and network outside your usual circles. When you have an inspiration, act on it.

Visitors from across the U.S. and 20 countries have visited the Mobley Hotel in Cisco. I think its because we all want to learn to see possibilities, even if those opportunities look like flophouses.

Missed Deadlines

Fri, 05 Apr 2013 14:09:00 GMT

I'll never forget the time years ago when I was working on a project that required a client send me a critical set of data by a mutually agreed upon date. I even padded in some time so I'd have it in plenty of time. The deadline slid. And kept sliding. They wanted to be sure they had it all before they sent it. I finally got down on my knees and begged. Our team pulled it together in time for the senior leader briefing, but we pulled out our hair in the process.

Why is it that some organizations, and people, take deadlines seriously, while others take them as a suggestion? This trait plagues so many companies, and the cost is high. Just look at Boeing. In 2012, the FAA fined them $13.5 million simply for failing to meet the deadline to provide manuals on preventing fuel tank explosions. At the outset of 2013, the FAA grounded the 787 while it went to work fixing those batteries. Commercial Aircraft chief executive Ray Connor told the press there was no question most of the mistakes were made early on in the program.

Missed deadlines are almost always a result of a failure to communicate.

The trouble is there isn't much really good advice out there on how to get better. When I Googled "tips on meeting deadlines," all that came back were articles on personal productivity. I don't know about you, but I have little trouble meeting my own deadlines. It's coordinating the work of many that can trip up even the best-organized leader.

The cost isn't only financial; our organizations pay the price in other ways that are harder to measure, like engagement, productivity and innovation.

You can articulate a better project management flow, and do a better job getting on top of projects, but I think there's another answer that is much more simple. Deadlines aren't so much about rules as respect. Your organization has to create a culture where people respect each other's need to get things done.

We also have to have the wisdom to know when good enough is good enough, or when a project requires more time to get it right. Heart surgery requires perfection - brochures do not. We have to agree on the definition of success before we slide the target date further and further back.

My high school orchestra leader used to say, "On time is late, and early is on time." I used to hate it when he said it, but funny how it's always ringing in my head.

Keeping Score

Fri, 22 Mar 2013 14:51:00 GMT

When it comes to your own retirement planning - the very words make you shudder, don't they? It's been a depressing pursuit for most of us for a long time, the recent stock market high not really making that much difference, yet. Most of my friends tell me that by traditional retirement calculators, they'll be able to stop working when they are about 93 years old.

As a result, when that darn retirement statement comes in the mail, we glance at it briefly and then file it away. Maybe at the end of the year we look at the "score;" where we are relative to 12 months ago. And anyway, as an economist would tell you, that statement is a lagging indicator, not a leading indicator, of how you're doing.

If you want to make real progress, you can't just look at the score at the end of the year. You have to look at the data that tells you what to do now to improve your odds of retiring. You need to measure other things, like how much you're automatically diverting from your hot little hands, the checking account, to your retirement account each month. Otherwise you're just kidding yourself and spending your discretionary money on stupid stuff.

That may be a simple analogy, but I think it's what has gotten a lot of well-meaning big companies in trouble. They are drowning in data and reporting after the fact, but they aren't tracking the metrics that track the changes they're trying to make in real time.

Alan Mulally insisted on a metrics approach at Ford Motor Company and took them from $17 Billion in debt to profitability in five short years. I just read with interest in the WSJ last week that Citigroup's new CEO, Michael Corbat is planning to do something similar. "You are what you measure," Corbat is quoted as saying to a gathering of 300 executives. He's telling his leaders to create scorecards with clear measures in five weighted categories: capital, clients, costs, culture and controls. This is expected to set him apart from predecessor Vikram Pandit, forced out by the board in October after a series of mishaps.

If you can agree on which data actually measure the change you're trying to drive, you'll have a much better conversation going with the leadership team. For instance, you can't do anything about it if you're only measuring deals signed; why not measure the increase in the number of meetings with qualified prospects, or the higher percentage of meetings with people who can introduce you to them? Leading indicators make better conversations for leaders, because they can hold each other accountable and do something early, not late.

Corbat wants answers to a simple question - "You said you would do this. Did you?

Read the article here: Citi's CEO Keeping Score

Walking the Dog

Thu, 21 Mar 2013 17:20:00 GMT

There are two reasons at our house to look forward to Sundays. Football is a given. The other is a close second...taking the dog for a long walk. We live in a town built for walking. The sidewalks bend and wind through neighborhoods and meet with a brook path lined with trees and pretty New England Capes and Colonials. Eventually you come into town where you can stroll along window shopping before you reach our guilty pleasure destination - Bruegger's Bagels. If you leave the house early enough, you can buy a bagel hot out of the oven, with cream cheese oozing out of the sides onto the waxed paper wrapper. Personally, I like the jalapeño bagels with jalapeño cream cheese.

We joke that our Jack Russel Terrier, Rosie, knows it's Sunday before we open our eyes. We don't even hint right away about a "double-u-A-el-Kay" but she knows wassup. Yes, we spell W-A-L-K and she still deciphers the human code. All I have to do is put on my black workout pants and her eyes go wide; she cocks her head and goes crazy, barking and herding us to the door as we gather jackets, sunglasses, and the twenty bucks we'll need for breakfast.

We have her on a leash, four miles, round trip, but she could find her way there on her own. What never ceases to amaze us is how excited she is about going the same old route. I got to wondering, why is it that dogs are always excited to revisit the same path, to reclaim the same old trees, fences and fire hydrants they visited a hundred times before? Somehow, they manage to sniff and waggle out exciting information, and do it primarily though one sense, the power of smell.

Apparently, a dog's sense of smell is between 1,000 and 10,000,000 times greater than a human, if you believe what you read on the Internet. Even if it's not ten million times more than our human smell power, their noses are never-the-less amazing. The part of the dog's brain that interprets smell is 40 times larger than ours. So when dogs sniff they don't just get a scent, they get a whole story.

While we are no match for our canine pals in this arena, and never will be, I got to thinking that there are some things we can learn from dogs to help us in business. For instance, dogs actually embrace routine (our equivalent of going to work) because they feel safe. They crave an environment predictable enough to relax, sniff and explore. Studies show that innovation is far more prevalent in safe environments where experimentation is encouraged. What if, as leaders, we created safer environments where people could wander a bit, sniff and discover?

In addition, one of the qualities often correlated with great leaders is curiosity. What if, as leaders, we went out into the same yard every day with a greater sense of wonder? What if we approached a pile of...well...poop...the equivalent of a mistake...as an opportunity? What if we asked ourselves, "Wonder what I can learn from this mess?"

I am working on a speech for a national leadership development conference and thinking of bring along a picture of Rosie. I thought I might talk about "sniffing for innovation." Do you think they would mind if used the word poop in the presentation?

Hmmm... Maybe I will just bring along bagels instead.

Flat Tire

Wed, 20 Mar 2013 19:03:00 GMT

It was 6:30 PM, I was on my way home and saw the tire pressure diagnostic come on. It's a funny graphic...four tire-like images, three green, one red...indicating that my right front tire pressure was going down...24...18...12...10...

I kept hoping it was just a fluke, an error, but the worst was confirmed when I heard the thud, thud, thud of the rubber giving way to a puddling mess, the metal of the wheel starting to make contact with pavement.

I pulled off the main route in town into an area next to the local post office. I was hungry and tired. Called my husband. He suggested the obvious, call roadside assistance. After rummaging through the glove box I finally unearthed the pamphlet, found the number and called. I gave my location to someone who probably works at a call center in Nebraska. And then I sat.

They always tell you that a local service will get back to you immediately; in this experience, "immediately" meant 15 or 20 minutes before the service guy even called.

"Where are you located?" he asked. As I explained where, it was pretty clear by his reaction that he was foggy about it, though it is a landmark in our town. "Where are YOU located?" I asked him. Turns out, he was four or five towns away. "So, are you the closest truck?" I asked. And without awaiting reply, I commented, "It's going to take you an hour!" He was still real nice. Just assured me he would be there pretty quickly.

As it turns out he made it in less than 30 minutes. He couldn't have been more pleasant. I was glad I hadn't embarrassed myself any more than being a little impatient on the phone. He put the spare on in about 47 seconds, and I was on my way home to a nice fire and a home-cooked meal.

So why did I predict the worst?

My expectations were low, based on several previous experiences. I had waited almost two hours in a parking lot the last time I had a flat; another time, I'd waited nearly three hours on a snowy, icy Christmas Eve. The guy never showed up; my husband rescued me.

I was reminded that what happens in the past is not necessarily useful in predicting the future. Those "data points" are not that relevant. I wasn't looking at THIS guy's response time. Instead, I had only examined random past experiences.

The other day we were working with a team on how to evaluate performance. They had lots of metrics available to them. But most of the data they were reviewing routinely was either historical, lagging indicators of things that had already happened, or, it didn't really tell you much about the goals and changes they were trying to drive.

To promote productive conversation and good decision making, you have to be analyzing a meaningful dashboard that is representative of the gap between your current and future state. Had I had the information on this particular service guy's response time, I would have had a different attitude. It would be worth it for your team to take that step now; while we are still near the beginning of the year, evaluate whether you are discussing the right data. You can't predict a flat tire, but you can have better information available to you when you get one

Advice from the Pilot

Wed, 20 Mar 2013 18:55:00 GMT

A month or so ago, a colleague and I boarded a short flight to Philly. We were assigned to Zone 1. Everyone who flies knows that if you don't get to sit in the big kids cabin (first-class), at least Zone 1 gets you on the plane early enough to find a spot for your carry-on luggage.

What we didn't realize was that we were flying on one of those new, smaller jets that the airlines are buying for short trips. I'm sure these planes are lighter and more fuel-efficient. Thousands of design hours and hundreds of executive meetings were undoubtedly devoted to this cutting-edge design. I'm sure there were toasts all around when they rolled out the new prototype for airline fuel-efficiency.

However, what all these brilliant people forgot is that the newly designed overhead bins don't hold more than one piece of luggage for every four passengers. And, they're so shallow that nothing but a glorified briefcase fits up there.

So....I get to my seat, and even though I'm in Zone 1, the bins are full. I slide awkwardly into the row, balanced on the armrest as waves of miserable passengers slowly file to the back. At a break in the flow, I maneuver toward the front to hand off my bag to an attendant. I was informed that the bag would be checked (not gate checked), meaning on arrival, we would have to detour to baggage claim. This would put us 30 minutes behind on our day's itinerary.

As I turned to go back to my seat, I muttered in frustration to my colleague, "This is why I hate XYZAir." Just then, I saw an XYZ Airline pilot, dead heading in the seat right behind my colleague. He looked down, pretending he didn't hear. After a beat, I felt bad, so I tapped the pilot on the shoulder and said, "Nothing personal. Like the people. Hate the airline."

He looked up and smiled. "We tell them all the time," he said. "They put these planes on busy routes with too much luggage. But they don't listen to us," he advised. "You need to write to them. They need to hear from the passengers. They won't do anything if they don't hear from you."

Rather than write customer service, I'm writing this post.

That plane has already been built, but future design mistakes can be avoided. This is an example of what happens when companies turn inward to solve their problems, without considering the customers' needs.

Fortunately, the incident was a great reminder to me about communicating change. Every company in America is working hard to update its products, processes and technology to drive efficiency. However, before you communicate the change you want to see, you have to be clear, as a leader, about the needs of all the stakeholders. Everyone must be served or at least considered. Before you set employees loose on a change initiative, you have to communicate the stakeholder issues, so they go to work on solutions that are not diametrically opposed to your strategic goals. Change shouldn't come at the expense of your customers' loyalty and satisfaction.

We have a simple tool called 180 Thinking, which we use in facilitated strategy sessions, to help leaders analyze the needs of all stakeholders. Before communicating a strategic plan, if the senior leadership team does not take a step back to analyze all the "audiences" (employees, suppliers, customers, etc.) then they risk setting in motion a strategy or project that will have unintended consequences. Let me know if you would like a copy of this tool or a copy of our white paper on communicating change.

The Wake

Wed, 20 Mar 2013 18:49:00 GMT

The Monsignor, in his 90's, doddered over to the front of the church, turning to face a small group in the first few pews. They were the wife and daughters, cousins, nieces, nephews and a couple of friends who were "like family" to Tom. We had assembled for a closing prayer after a wake punctuated by some hearty laughter and too many tears. Anticipating a brief ceremony, we had no expectation that any words might comfort us; no hope anything would salve the searing pain we felt after losing him to a long, brutal battle with cancer.

The wake was an extraordinary outpouring of love and respect for a man and his family. The guest book recorded 396 names. That wasn't even close to everyone who came. Tom wasn't famous by standard measures, but he was widely known to all in the community. He worked for nearly 40 years as a guidance counselor at the same high school where his wife taught home economics until they retired. She is the kind of person who gives kids lunch money or a ride to work after school. He was that guy in the guidance office who believed everyone should be given a chance. Not to mention, he was a walking encyclopedia on the ins and outs of college admissions. Tom never stopped to count the number of kids he guided. It must have been at least 7,000. In his spare time, he went to every one of his girls' games and recitals, and pursued his other passion, refereeing local football.

Our feet were killing us. The doors opened at 3:00 on a blistering cold Friday afternoon. Friends and neighbors, coworkers and extended family lined up all the way to the back of the church. The family had correctly guessed that no local funeral home would have the space to accommodate the crowds. People stood patiently in line in the sanctuary, speaking quietly, looking at the photos, waiting an hour and a half before passing by the casket to hug Joan and the girls. Visiting hours ended at 7:00 pm but it wasn't until 8:15 when the last family acquaintance shook our hands.

I can't count the number of times a person said something like, "Tom was my hero," or "He got my son into Cornell," or, "He made me believe I was college material." "We worked side by side for 25 years." "I've never known a finer man." And the referees! You could spot them from afar. Strapping guys' guys who walked confidently, sporting broad shoulders and contagious smiles. What a fraternity. So many showed up that they started joking they could have held their annual upstate New York referee association meeting right there.

Now, with our small band assembled in the front three pews, the rush over, the place quiet, we were thinking more about getting some sleep and steeling ourselves for the next day's funeral, which promised to be hard.

The Monsignor smiled gently and began. His body was frail, but his voice was strong. "I am reminded tonight of something the English poet Charles Lamb once said about good deeds. 'The greatest pleasure I know is to do a good action by stealth and to have it found out by accident.'" The corners of his mouth turned upward ever-so slightly, his eyes twinkling, his tone almost mischievous. "What has happened tonight is that Tom has allowed you to discover by accident his many good deeds."

We laughed. We knew.

My husband's only brother had often been called George by his wife. As in, George Bailey, from the movie "It's a Wonderful Life." He was the richest man in town in all the ways that you count, at times like these. He and Joan had a circle of friends, other couples, and their kids, whom they referred to as "the extended family." Christmas photos through the years chronicled the passing of time with taller and taller children, and grayer hair. Tom was always quick with a one liner. Never failed to ask how you were doing. A fiercely devoted father, he raised two gorgeous, loving girls. In retirement, every single morning, he met his pals at the Panera restaurant down the street to tell stories and talk sports. All in all, he touched more people in a real way than most of us will ever hope to.

During the quiet of an airplane ride, I had a chance to reflect. What could I take from this? What sense could we make of the loss of a great guy who left us too soon?

And it hit me.

I've been reading some books on productivity. These prompted me to think that I need to become more "ruthless" with my time, more selfish about my calendar. I'm confessing it because I am certain that most people I know wrestle with it. People come along in your life in need of...something...from you. Help making a connection; getting a book published; a speech critiqued; advice about a boss or board of directors; finding a job. I am ashamed to say that the strong desire for greater productivity and better calendar management was making me think all this stuff was distracting me from business.

I was missing the point.

This is my business. It is the business of...a wonderful life.

In Tom's last days, he could do nothing for himself. His wife and daughters, and my husband, took up the burden of caring for his body and spirit. There were friends that stopped by almost daily; cousins that took long drives on weekends to stand witness. Tom gave all the opportunity to do their stealthy good deeds. As a result, in his final days, all experienced the gift of giving back. It is the work of our lives and as Tom showed us, someday, accidentally, our good deeds will be discovered.

The Future

Mon, 28 Jan 2013 19:56:00 GMT

The other night as we settled onto the family room couch with a couple of blankets to watch a movie, my husband turned to me and said, "And don't ask me what's going to happen, because I haven't seen this either." This preemptive strike got a laugh out of all of us. I must admit I have an annoying habit of querying him, several times, at the scariest or most suspenseful points in a film. I'm surprised I still get invited to family movie nights.

Sometimes, I just can't stand not knowing what is going to happen. I think it's because I lose myself in a drama to the point where it becomes real. My husband can fall asleep in the middle of the part where the guy is standing on the ledge; I will hang in there until midnight, even if it's a terrible story. I steel myself for the journey from here to there, even if I have a pretty good idea how it is going to turn out.

It is human nature to want to know what tomorrow holds. We ask pundits and economists to take the guesswork out of it. If we could know, we could relax, worry less, plan better. In business, we would just follow that roadmap to produce a particular result.

The 24 hour news cycle also fuels this fantasy that if we talk about what's going to happen, we might actually figure it out. In a way, this does happen, especially in Washington. The political stalemates are self-fulfilling prophesies. The more we talk about the failure of government, the more it fails.

So now we have the army of prognosticators pointing to trends and telling us, based on what has happened under a set of particular circumstances in the past, what's going to happen this year. It's good to be informed of what could happen, or as the saying goes, we are destined to repeat our mistakes.

However, this information cannot assuage anxiety, and it is very likely to be wrong. Look at the black swan theory. Taleb's premise is that we cannot predict unpredictable events; we can only build in robustness to negative ones and be prepared to exploit positive ones. This in a nutshell means keeping your powder dry while staying nimble. And to stay nimble, I would argue, what you need most is a belief in yourself.

The courage of our convictions can help us stare down the future and take destiny into our own hands. As Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "the future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." This is a good time to get a firm hold on those dreams of ours and pursue them with a vengeance. We will become what we imagine, if first, we believe.

I don't know if I will ever break my bad movie habit, but I'm thinking it's a good place to practice. At least it will make for better evenings in front of the TV.

Give Me a Hand

Tue, 22 Jan 2013 13:54:00 GMT

Back in the years when the little things were a big deal, I was a cheerleader. In those days, at our school, cheerleading was the only "team sport" for girls. There was tennis, but tennis isn't a team sport, and nobody goes to the tennis matches in high school. In contrast, everybody goes to the football and basketball games, especially in the Midwest. For all you guys who think this is some girly article, keep reading, because it's about guy stuff, too.

Despite some beliefs, cheerleaders aren't just there to cheer on the other teams; they are competitive themselves. The summer between my junior and senior year, our squad had the honor of being invited to compete at the ICF (International Cheerleading Federation) in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

A few weeks before the event, I was out in the backyard practicing, and ended up in a big fight with my mom. She yelled at me. I came to the back door. We argued. She slammed the door in my face. Stupidly, as the door was careening shut, I stiff armed it to stop it. The glass shattered, I looked down, and there was a huge gash. Blood was streaming down my arm. My neighbors drove me to the hospital.

Five stitches later, I was back home teary, weary and bandaged from wrist to mid forearm. I could not flex my wrist, which was a problem because my role in the competition was to lift my best friend and partner Debi onto the fourth tier of our mount, onto my shoulders, where she would give the victory sign on top.

We took the long bus trip to Michigan. I was a nervous wreck. We started the competition fine. I was able to climb up two tiers, but when I stood and reached back for Debi's hand, I couldn't hold on. As my hand released, she lost her balance and spilled backward, the fall broken by the rest of the squad collapsing onto the gym floor like a house of cards. (Here's the guy part.) Imagine watching the star high school wide receiver going out for the game-winning pass with five seconds on the clock in the biggest game of the year, running a perfect route, getting open, and then letting a beautiful pass slip through the tips of his fingers.

For a long time, I absolutely could not see the point of this episode in my 17-year-old life. My friends, the other nine on our squad, had killed themselves to get to that competition. Every morning, we'd hauled ourselves out of bed at 6:00 a.m. for summer morning practices. It was meant to be us. Now, as the girl responsible for our competitive demise, I was mad at my mom, embarrassed that I'd allowed it to happen, and in despair that I'd let down my friends

It took me a very, very long time to appreciate the lesson, which is: The squad, my friends, my teammates, never held it against me. Not for a minute. They weren't angry, they didn't blame me, though they were deeply disappointed too. As a matter of fact, I was voted captain that very same year.

The point is, we really were a team. When you are a team, you win or lose as a team. In business, I don't hear that as much as I'd like around the hallways of many companies. What I hear instead is the blame game. This one is in over his head. That one dropped the ball. This one blew it. That one is worried only about himself.

The hard truth is that sometimes you're going to be the weakest link. It's at those moments that you're going to appreciate being on a real team. If the team rallies around you, even when you stumble, you solidify your commitment to them. You can't always win, but you will never win as a team if you don't know how to lose as a team too. And those losses make the wins so much sweeter.

Keeping Me Waiting

Tue, 22 Jan 2013 13:47:00 GMT

We had been greeted and escorted into the interior waiting area outside the office of the new SVP. My colleagues and I had a 4:00 PM meeting, arranged behest of his team, who had worked with us on successful leadership training projects. He was certainly a busy guy; scheduling the appointment had been challenging, but we were finally able to make it work late on a Thursday afternoon.

The sofa and chair were positioned twenty feet from the inner office, so we had a direct view to his desk. Door flung wide open, we could see him seated in a generous leather chair, phone cradled against his ear. The time was about 4:03. His assistant offered coffee, we said no thanks. Sitting within earshot, we didn't speak, except for occasional whispers about the agenda for the meeting.

Around 4:15, he looked up and gave a brief wave, as if to say, "I'll be just a minute." We smiled back, still friendly, and returned to our silent vigil. There were no magazines or newspapers, and we couldn't make noise, so we sat there shifting around uncomfortably in our chairs.

At 4:25, he was still on the phone. At first I had assumed that it must be some type of critical personnel issue, since he was the head of Human Resources. No one would keep visitors waiting this long unless there was a crisis. However, as I tuned in (I couldn't help but hear drifts of his end of the conversation) I noted there wasn't a shred of urgency in his voice. Several times he actually laughed out loud.

Finally, at 4:30, I stood and walked over to his assistant's desk. "If this has turned out to be an inconvenient time for Mr. X to meet, we would be happy to reschedule," I said. "Oh, gosh, he is behind today," she replied. "Let me go in and give him a note." I sat back down, reluctantly. She entered the inner sanctum, returned and advised us it would just be a minute or two more.

At 4:45, he was STILL on the phone. I stood and walked back over to the assistant. "Let's reschedule," I said politely but more emphatically. "Yes, I'm really sorry," she replied with a hint of pain. "Great," I said, "we'll give you a call."

We had already picked up coats, bags and briefcases and stepped toward the hall, when suddenly Mr. X appeared. "I'm sorry to keep you waiting. I was talking with (I will call them) Chris and Maureen. Please come in." The two individuals to whom he referred were people that reported to him. My suspicions were confirmed. There was no crisis, a fact they later confirmed. He had decided to keep us waiting.

You can imagine how the meeting went. We rallied to plaster on our best professional faces. He mostly waxed about his considerable achievements. Let's just say it wasn't exactly a two-way exchange of ideas. At 5:15, we thanked him and left. Maybe a year and a half later, I heard he was gone. A year or two after that, the company slashed its US business by two thirds. The huge campus of offices now appear mostly dark when I drive by at five on a winter afternoon.

I'm just sayin'.

I've often reflected on the reasons people keep you waiting. Whether they do it because they can't manage their time, or because they are arrogant and self-important like Mr. X, I am certain they have no idea how this behavior reflects on them and their companies. The impression lingers, well, FOREVER.

This is all about how you treat the people who you THINK don't really matter. I had a similar experience with that company's previous CEO. I don't believe it was a coincidence that they were unable to compete in their industry. Arrogance in the way you treat "unimportant" people is just a symptom of what is happening behind closed doors as decisions are made that make or break a company.

To every boyfriend I ever kept waiting in my parents' front hall when I was a teenager, I wish to apologize. It was inconsiderate. No excuses. I have tried never to do it since. To every business person over the age of 22 who keeps people waiting in the foyer of their office? I like to say that this isn't high school. You're not that cool.

Destination Maternity: Leadership Readiness & Anticipating the New Arrival

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 21:50:00 GMT

This will sound shortsighted, but when I first got pregnant I was really obsessed with maternity clothes. I remember going to one of those maternity stores, I think it was called A Pea in the Pod, trying on lots of stuff, and probably spending too much. My girlfriend Bryan tagged along to give me her opinion. As we were walking out of the store, I hesitated, saying "maybe I should go back for that other sheath dress, and maybe those color washed jeans, and the gray sweater, too." Bryan stopped me. "You know, it doesn't matter that much," she said, "You're not going to wear them that long. Before you know it you'll have a baby. And you're going to be so sick of the clothes you'll throw them all in the trash!"

It hit me then. I was going to have a BABY. I know it's crazy, but I had been so focused on pregnancy I didn't yet have my head around the new human being about to arrive! Babies show up here on earth without a suitcase. They need a place to sleep, and something to wear. I needed to start planning a baby's room, and setting aside funds for creature comforts like rocking chairs, bassinets, and onesies, not to mention the stuff every parent eventually wants to provide, like swimming lessons, saxophones, and a college fund.

Last night as I was driving by a store called Destination Maternity it struck me that when a woman is pregnant (the first time) she actually may believe for a short time, like I did, that the destination IS maternity. Hah! With those emotions kicking in, it's hard to get your mind past the changes in your body, never mind start shopping for car seats and checking on potential babysitters. Brain freezes won't allow you to think beyond where to find the prego version of skinny jeans.

Similarly, when big change is afoot inside our organizations, we often have trouble getting past the immediate. Nine months out is a long time, and a baby is just theoretical at that point. The feelings and emotions of the moment freeze up our brains and prevent us from planning for the enormity of matters in the not-so-distant future.

Just as every mother and father-to-be is jolted into new reality when the day arrives, so business leaders feel on day one of a launch or a major organizational change. That's why, right now, you need a plan. You have a lot of communicating to do before and after "Day One," or nobody will know what to do when the new baby comes home.

As a business leader, you have to get everybody ready for the new arrival and then keep them focused on the right tasks when the baby is awake in the middle of the night and people are exhausted. This is where your communication skills and plan come in handy. A plan and good execution will not only get your organization past exhaustion, it will enable them to do the things that allow that new "baby" to grow and thrive. Whether it's an acquisition, a new product launch, an IT conversion, or a global expansion, you need a communication plan and leaders who are committed to it.

By the way, we have an excellent white paper on M&A communication that you can read on our website.

Pecan Pie

Mon, 17 Dec 2012 22:33:00 GMT

When I was growing up, my mom used to put me on the train up to Chicago to see my grandmother. Marion Whitmore was an elegant lady and devoted grandma who lived in a thoughtfully appointed one bedroom apartment on the city side of a high rise right on Lake Shore Drive. Her building stood proudly on the edge of the fresh water ocean known as Lake Michigan. In those days you didn't need a car because you could call down to the little grocer on the first floor and have eggs, milk and bread delivered to your door.

I thought she was the coolest. Little did I know just how cool. Years later, I learned that after marrying and having two boys and a girl in the 1930s, her husband abandoned her for another woman... the night after my grandmother threw his 40th birthday bash. She was left alone to raise three small children on a secretary's salary. This was her thanks for traipsing across the country during the Depression and making temporary homes for the family in log cabins in the CCC camps, where the government gave guys out-of-work a job logging or clearing roads.

I would travel up to Chicago wearing a dress and white gloves (mom insisted) and Grandma would take me shopping at her favorite children's boutique. I remember the year she bought me the orange polka dot suit. To this day it remains my favorite outfit ever. After shopping, we would make our way to Marshall Fields to lunch in the cafe on tea sandwiches and iced tea. Dessert was pecan pie, a la mode. It was always pecan pie. We both would declare how much we loved it. I couldn't wait until the next time we could go. Two forks, two kindred souls.

The other night while traveling to a client engagement, I ordered the pecan pie a la mode from room service at the Omni Hotel in Philadelphia. The memory came flooding back again. I've always wondered why this is such a powerful anchor for me. I know it must be that sharing something small with people you care about comes to symbolize something much more, especially over time. Eventually the memory becomes a trigger that reconnects you with all those good feelings.

In a healthy work environment, shared rituals should happen, too.

Sometimes people just create them on their own, but as a leader you can also invent them. Pizza to celebrate a win; popcorn at 3 pm on Fridays, cake every time somebody on the team has a birthday. I never really worked in a place with shared rituals before I started this company, which is maybe why I really appreciate them now. It takes the stress out of the day, reconnects you to the human beings known as "co-workers" and forces everybody to talk about TOTW...(Things Other Than Work).

I won't say we are perfect at it in our office. The big joke is that we celebrate for 34 seconds and then go back to work. This year we worked on it - extending that celebration to a minute and a half. That was progress. But at least we do it.

With the New Year on the horizon, it seems like a great time to think about rituals that might build the bonds among your team. Little things can really mean a lot. In a year that seems destined to be filled with uncertainty, those anchors might just get us through it, together.

If we can't appreciate what we have, more will never be enough.

I include myself among the sinners who forget how much there is to be happy about.

Happy Holidays!

Taking Risks

Mon, 10 Dec 2012 15:34:00 GMT

A week or two ago, I picked up Fortune Magazine's 50 Most Powerful Women. Virginia Rometty, IBM's 9th CEO and first woman chief executive, was named the most powerful woman, chosen for her influence on the world of technology and her company's impact on the financial markets. IBM is the 9th largest US company by revenue and the 5th largest in market valuation at $235 billion.

Rometty's 30 year career at Big Blue spans a transformation that has been underway for more than a decade and is still unfolding. Some years ago, Rometty caught the eye of executives by championing the $3.5 billion acquisition of Price Waterhouse Coopers consulting business. Charming and cajoling 150,000 IBMers to integrate with 30,000 PWC consultants, she turned a risky business venture that could have been disastrous into a huge success. She managed to forge together a mishmash of cultures, while simultaneously squaring up the complexities of two disparate compensation and operational structures.

Rometty became known as a leader that takes risks and wins. Fortune didn't really go way back into her history to say why. However, when we went searching, we found a fun little video clip where she speaks quite candidly, almost girlishly, about that day early in her career that many women have. Her boss offered her a big job. Like women sometimes do, she over-analyzed it; standing there, she reacted, told him she wasn't ready, needed to go home and thinking about it. "So I was blah blah blahing to my husband about it," that night she shares, "he stopped me finally and said, do you think a man would have said that?" She took the job. She did it very well. She learned that even if you don't feel confident, you have to believe in yourself.

One thing I've noticed about leaders (men and women) is that while early in their careers they do take risks, they grow more reticent as they get promoted because there is more to lose. Not Rometty. She kept going, which is what got her to the top of one of the largest most successful companies. Of course, it's never enough for the press. "Ginny Rometty isn't trying to reinvent Big Blue," says Fortune, "but she has to live up to ridiculously high expectations...IBM has said it will add $20 Billion in revenue growth in the next three years," To put that into perspective, that's a business roughly the size of Nike, according to the magazine, a company that is #136 on the Fortune 500.

There she goes, making another big bet!

What inspires a leader to keep taking risks? I mean, after they have the big job, when there is so much at stake, when everybody is watching. I'm talking about what could happen to the company, its position in the marketplace, as well as the CEO, and his or her reputation; their legacy. It's all on the line! After all, when you look around corporate America, you have to look for the risk takers. Why don't we take more risks? I think it's simple. First, there isn't a lot of reward, really, for those who do. Second, the resources of the organization often aren't marshaled around risky moves. Third, if you miscalculate, the downsides aren't so painful. Or so goes that kind of thinking.

Trouble is, very often, working on the margins isn't treading water, it's going under. Plus, meaningful change is exciting and motivating for a team and an organization. When they understand where they are going and why, they can move mountains. You may know the story of Daniel Burnham, the architect of the amazing, absolutely incredible feat that was the Chicago World's Fair. If you've never read Devil in the White Cityby Erik Larson, put it on your list. Burnham was responsible for that often mangled quote, "Make no little plans. They have no magic to stir men's blood."

Burnham believed you had to think big or go home.

There is one more factor, which Burnham's story highlights. It isn't so much that we're afraid to take risks, as we don't imagine bigger things. Of course you have to analyze the risks and rewards of a big play. But to do that, you have to start witha big idea. Big ideas inspire us, and our organizations.

I would really encourage you to read the Fortune Magazine profile. I was inspired. Made me think about what I'd really like to shoot for.

Tell me about a risk you took that paid off!

Worry

Mon, 26 Nov 2012 19:12:00 GMT

There is a lot of worry in the world right now. Everybody is fretting. The “fiscal cliff” has become our national nightmare. This vision of going over the edge is frightening. Collective worry is driving our blood pressure up and the stock markets down. Do we tack this way or that? Hire or retrench? Invest or sit on the sidelines?

It’s not like we haven’t been through worrisome times. The financial crisis of 2008 wasn’t so long ago. Yet it seems we have forgotten a little about how we got through it. So, I went digging around in the news archives to try to remember what we did the last time we thought the sky was falling. I found a New York Times article by Gregory Berns, director of the Center for Neuropolicy at Emory University.

“Everyone I know is scared,” wrote Berns on December 6, 2008. “We are caught in a spiral in which we are so scared of losing our jobs, our savings, that fear overtakes our brains,” he observed. While fear is a deep-seated and adaptive evolutionary drive for self-preservation, he explains, it makes it impossible to concentrate on anything but saving ourselves.

I’d never heard of a neuro-economist, but apparently, these are folks who use brain-scanning technologies to decode the decision-making systems of the human mind. Berns's interest was in sharing how to keep the human brain from short-circuiting sound decision making. They identified something called the “endowment effect” in which fear of loss makes us grip tightly to what we have. When everyone does this at once, we go into an economic spiral.

“Ultimately, no good can come from this type of decision making,” said Berns. “Fear prompts retreat. It is the antipode to progress. Just when we need new ideas most, everyone is seized up in fear, trying to prevent losing what we have left.”

Anyone reading this today that was in business in 2008 remembers that worry was all people talked about. Interestingly, we haven’t had a real, robust recovery, which may be why a boomerang recession is so scary, emotionally. It threatens to rip the Band-Aid off of our fragile psyches and put fear back in the driver’s seat. And that would be a mistake.

I remember how I felt that month. My company, five years old, had just moved into new office spaces when clients started canceling and postponing. The payroll was due, the rent check was owed, and I had to decide how I was going to react. I won’t tell you that I wasn’t afraid. I simply decided I wasn’t going to let circumstances dictate my fate. The dream of building a business and making it thrive was too important.

Fortunately I had a team of colleagues who felt the same way. We got together and thought about new clients and new approaches. We did a lot more reaching out. When it started working, we wrote a a booklet and did a webinar about Communicating in Challenging Times. Ideas big and small got us through. One coach suggested we bring in our own coffee. Every day we kept putting one foot in front of the other.

I’m not suggesting that the fast-approaching December 2012 will be exactly like 2008. It won’t. But we can and should bring the mindset that got us through before into our new reality. It’s time to stop and remember how to cope with uncertainty and refuse to allow worry to drive our decisions.

Berns suggests that the first order of business is to neutralize the brain system that tells us to avoid risk when we feel fear. That means you have to stop talking about fear, avoid people who are overly pessimistic about the economy, and tune out media that “fan emotional flames.”

You can prepare for a slower economy; you can be smart about where you invest; but if you don’t walk away from the negative stimulus, you may make decisions you regret. Or not make decisions at all. Let’s have a little faith. It will lower our blood pressure and raise our spirits.

A Thanksgiving Message

Wed, 21 Nov 2012 15:27:00 GMT

I’m grateful because...

This country offers us opportunity limited only by our imaginations

Work allows us to find a place for our talents and a purpose for our lives

Challenges force us to rise up, test ourselves and find the courage we need

Colleagues are there to celebrate success and lift us up when things are hard

Foes force us to learn lessons that might otherwise elude us

Pain breaks us, humbles us and makes us more reflective

Joy makes us stop and truly appreciate the life we have

Home provides a safe place where we can revitalize and restore

Friends remind us who we are, where we’ve been, and why it matters

Family prove to us we are loved and cherished simply for who we are

Love brings us closer to higher purpose, and the meaning of it all

May we each find a moment of gratitude in each and every day.

Happy Thanksgiving

Suzanne

Unity

Tue, 13 Nov 2012 17:48:00 GMT

These are strange and unsettling times, post-election. Winners are trying to disguise the joy, even glee; losers are trying on a countenance of humility, fighting through bitter disappointment. The electorate has spoken. The vote is done. We are a democracy. Now we move forward.

With incessant talk about avoiding crisis, coming together, finding compromises and seeking unity, I got to wondering, how will we get there? How do we define unity? What are we really trying to achieve?

The assumption is that unity means we must all agree on something. If absolute agreement is the goal, we can be sure that we will fail. We are so utterly divided over what the problems are that we are unable to see eye to eye on the solutions.

So maybe it would be good to have a better, more nuanced definition of unity. Perhaps if we could redefine it, we could actually work toward a more harmonious state.

The dictionary defines unity as "the state of being united or joined as a whole, especially in a political context," and "harmony or agreement between people or groups." Given the ever-growing gaps and level of vitriol in the political sphere, it seems hard to achieve something as simple as "agreement between people and groups."

So, I went searching for a better definition. And I think I found it in music and art.

Artists don't pick up a brush and paint a single color on a canvas. Musicians don't play one note.

In fact, the definition of unity in art is when all of the elements of a piece combine to make a balanced, harmonious, complete whole. It's hard to describe but your eye and brain know it when they see it. They can see how balance is achieved in the sum of the work.

In music, unity consists of repetition (similarity) and contrast. If you're a musician you'll recognize terms such as a repeating refrain; thematic unity, tonal plan (starting and finishing in the same key visiting related keys in between), or recurrent intervals. I played the violin and the piano, but I'm not a musician. What I know is that whether you prefer the Beach Boys or Baroque, great music finds the balance between similarity and dissimilarity.

The point is that we need to embrace a different definition of unity so that we come to believe we can achieve it. We are not seeking to be the same. We are not seeking even to agree, completely. We are seeking to find a balance in the variance by including the right amount of this and that. We have to give our differences a place on the canvas so that the result is a true artistic or political triumph.

John Lennon's most celebrated song, "Imagine," described his view of a utopian world - one in which there were no disagreements:

"Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say that I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one"

I think the "Imagine" concept is so foreign to what we expect to achieve in our lifetimes that we should appreciate it, but seek something else. Not to avoid disagreement, but to listen for the opportunity to transition from the minor to major chord. Not to paint all the colors on top of each other, but let them live side by side. With that we can create one interesting canvas.

"The Destiny of Man is to unite, not to divide. If you keep on dividing you end up as a collection of monkeys throwing nuts at each other out of separate trees." - T. H. White, The Once and Future King

Decision Day

Tue, 06 Nov 2012 18:37:00 GMT

So, it has arrived. Decision day. A good time to consider the power of decision.

According to Columbia researcher Sheena Iyengar, the average American makes 70 decisions a day. We spend half of our average waking hours (17.3) at work, which means I suppose that in that 8.65 hours, half the decisions are related to our business lives.

Nick Tasler extrapolates in Psychology Today that we have 35 chances a day to propel our business or career forward. If you apply this formula to your team, or the entire company, then the factor is 35n. So thousands of decisions are made each day in your organization to the power of n, and in the aggregate they will accelerate, stall or derail the proverbial train.

Are some decisions more important than others? Of course. The one thing we agree on this Election Day is that the differences between our presidential candidates are crystal clear. It is a momentous choice. By 8 PM tonight, we will have determined a collective future for our children, grandchildren and generations beyond. Someday, they will look back on this day in history, and study why we took one road and not the other.

There does exist a small percentage of American citizens who don't think this decision matters all that much. They rationalize that whoever wins still has to face-off with a deeply divided, partisan Washington, elected and empowered by us yet unable to put their heads together and use common sense as their guide. That the state of our government today is gridlock cannot be denied. However, most Americans still have faith that with the right mix of leadership, we can make sensible policy that benefits the common good.

It must be really fun to reside in one of those swing states (the ones where the TV stations have been popping the cork to celebrate gazillions in advertising dollars) since living there, you KNOW your vote COUNTS.

But my sense is that wherever they live, people can't wait to go to the polls today. We want our voices to be heard. We relish the opportunity to mark that ballot. There is the wildly crazy, remote possibility that our home state will confound the political pundits; maybe a sure-thing, true-blue state will go red, or a reliably-red state will turn blue.

Maybe voters will confound a sophisticated get-out-the-vote machine, where coordinators equipped with high-tech tracking software seem to know where and what time your grandmother is shopping for groceries, so they can pick her up in a van and get her to the polls.

We have a choice. Roughly 230 million of our 300 million-plus population is over the age of 18, and today, if they are registered, they can choose.

Choice is empowering. Choice is liberating. Choice inspires us to be better citizens, and better people. We inform ourselves. We debate, listen, analyze, consider, discuss, and defend. The mere fact that we have a choice makes us more responsible. We take ownership of our choices. We are thrilled by the chance to determine our destiny. We understand that we will only have ourselves to thank or blame for the outcome.

In business, it works this way, too. When people are empowered to choose, they are liberated. This choice unleashes a force that simply does not exist when leaders make decisions that should be made by their teams.

Great leaders understand how potent choice is. They know that when they set the direction and insist on choice, not simply allow it, something amazing happens. People begin to debate, analyze, consider, discuss, defend, and take ownership. When they take ownership, they make better decisions. And then, with a say in the choice, they work harder to see it through.

As a political junkie, I really love this day for all it stands for; the hopes and dreams of individuals, and the possibilities for a nation still defining itself in the world. If you're reading this before you walk or drive to your polling place to cast that ballot, I hope that you hold the pen or puncher in hand, and savor the moment. And then perhaps you may also be inspired to go to work and unleash the power of choice in your organization. Who knows what will happen that you cannot yet imagine?

Resistance: Leading through the Stages of Change

Tue, 30 Oct 2012 16:18:00 GMT

Some years ago, I was living too far away from work, and had to get up too early to get there at a ridiculous hour. Winter mornings were especially treacherous. At 3:30 a.m. I would get into my Jeep Cherokee, head out on a dark, unplowed road, and hope to be lucky enough to fall in behind one of those conga lines of snow plows clearing the way. That stretch was so isolated, driving it so stressful, that I couldn’t do one more January-February commute. My daughter was about to start first grade, so if we were going to move, this was the time.

The answer seemed obvious – move to a town with similar attributes, closer to work. It meant finding a buyer for our adorable little Cape-style house in a not-so-great-market, and finding a home in a neighborhood as cozy and neighborly. We’d grown used to this historic Massachusetts town with great little shops, restaurants, and excellent schools. And, we would have to spend more.

My fiancé, now husband, got a vote, but since I owned the home, my vote counted more. My daughter was too young to vote, but old enough to feel forlorn. Saying goodbye to the cul-de-sac and her three-Musketeer friends across the street was something she didn’t understand. Our beloved nanny was even less thrilled. She was soon returning to Ireland, and didn’t exactly feel excited about packing up our family before she got herself out of dodge.

Looking back I think our tiny family was a perfect laboratory for the change leadership we so often talk about with our clients. It was an early taste of what the process of change is all about. The emotional ups and downs were similar to what happens in a company when change seems like a good idea, until people have to do it.

People can agree, in theory, a thing must be done, and then feel differently when they think about what it’s going to take. Things have to be fixed, changed, moved, and altered. The daunting nature of daily life sends us back into “denial” about whether we need to do it at all. We start, and then revert back to denial. It has to be discussed again. Resistance reappears; as a leader you feel like you’re taking one step forward, and two steps back.

When we work with our clients we often refer to the process model below. Change dynamics start with denial, and morph into resistance. You’re trying to move people into the next two boxes, trying things out, and then committing to action. What happens, if you don’t keep everybody focused on the benefits, is they start thinking about all they have to lose, forget about what they stand to gain. The way things are doesn’t look so bad. You start to appreciate the status quo. When those emotions kick in, people’s brains go into “park,” and they find other things to do.

I saw this happen to one of my clients recently. His own team would nod their heads when he got them together to talk about the strategic plan. Then, one by one they showed up in his office, to tell him why it wouldn’t work. Some of them actually quit because they painted themselves into a corner defending the merits of the status quo.

I remember those emotions. Even though I was convinced moving was right, I felt overwhelmed trying to find the new home, get the one we lived in sold, and do it in time for my daughter to start school. Maybe I was trying to do too much. I think this is how leaders feel sometimes. They're confronted with all that denial and resistance, start to question their decisions, and wonder whether change is even possible. They begin to blame the organization or the culture.

The move worked out beautifully. We purchased a home we still live in. We love the neighborhood. My daughter went all the way through school there. It was worth it.

It’s hard to imagine what change is going to be like until you live it. You tend to imagine only pain, not bliss. That’s why it's absolutely essential for leaders to keep talking about what's out there in the future, what it’s going to look like, and how it’s going to feel. Your job is to paint that picture and keep people’s eyes on the prize. You need to communicate the vision with courage and conviction. Conviction overcomes resistance and gets you through those early, difficult days.

We have an excellent special report on communicating to lead change. Let us know if you’d like a copy.

Rivalry: Leadership Lessons from Mark Twain and Theodore Roosevelt

Thu, 25 Oct 2012 13:37:00 GMT

I've recently been reading about a fascinating time in our nation's history, more than 100 years ago, the topic, a previously unknown rivalry between the writer Mark Twain and the political leader Theodore Roosevelt.

These two famous, brilliant, highly-regarded and influential men held widely divergent views of America's place in the world. And the story is instructive, when it comes to understanding what happens when smart, successful, well-intentioned business leaders in our time become rivals.

The turn of the last century brought unfathomable transformation, equal or greater than what we in this generation have witnessed. It was the dawn of the age that would bring automobiles, radio, air travel, and electric lights, and other changes that would issue in modern America. Today we talk about Jobs, Gates and Zuckerman; at the dawn of the 1900s the visionaries were Rockefeller, Edison, Carnegie, Wright and Ford.

In Mark Twain and the Colonel, author Philip McFarland masterfully weaves together two compelling biographies, that of humorist, frontiersman, author, lecturer and newspaperman Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens), and that of war hero, Rough Rider, easterner and then-Vice Presidential candidate Theodore Roosevelt. McFarland documents how these two equally flamboyant figures (constantly quoted in the newspapers, admired, influential, and neither at a loss for words) came to develop vastly different views of whether America should be the protector and defender of the world, or a benign presence. Samuel Clemens, always quoted in the invented persona Mark Twain, came to believe our powerful nations should not determine the fate of other sovereign states; Roosevelt, who would become President, held that expansionism was our duty, protected not only to protect this country's interests but more importantly to bring the blessings of democracy and self-determination to oppressed people beyond our shores.

The similarities were clear. Both men were well-read, intellectual, and worldly. That's where it ended. Clemens grew up on the Mississippi River in the 1840s with a stern father yet idyllic childhood, until at 11 when that father died, throwing the family into poverty, before ultimately they grew rich selling the land they owned. Roosevelt on the other hand was a patrician, an Easterner born to a Southern Bell and a Northern abolitionist father. He believed privilege compelled one to duty.

Clemens sat out the Civil War in the Western United States and from 1891-1900 lecturing, writing and later living abroad for a decade in Europe. Roosevelt threw himself into the front lines of the Spanish-American War, assembling a choice cavalry of remarkably courageous, disciplined fighters who would be the first to land in Cuba. The Rough Rider cavalry, from all walks of life, charged up Kettle Hill to free the Cuban people enslaved by an oppressive, brutal regime.

Roosevelt's bravery, heroism and example made him a beloved war hero who was soon nominated as VP in McKinley's second term. Roosevelt became an expansionist. He believed America had a duty to bring democracy to far flung shores. Clemens' years away from America made him skeptical of warring to free people. He thought America had no right to intervene; people should determine their own governance. There isn't time here to share all the factors that shaped these two, but if you are interested, it's a very satisfying read.

What is relevant to business leaders today is a deeper understand of how rivalries develop. I think back on the times when our coaches have been asked to work with executives that are at at odds, the common theme is everyone is quite frustrated. Why would smart, hard working leaders be so stupid as to let pettiness undermine their projects and reputations? It happens. The reason, beyond ego and ambition, are simply that it takes years to become who we are and it is well imprinted. Life's experiences define us, and sometimes, divide us. That intelligent, gifted leaders see things through different lenses shouldn't be a big surprise.

Twain and Roosevelt had only their own axes to sharpen and grind. They didn't have to work it out; being at odds served them. In contrast, rival business leaders in the same company will wreak havoc.

I have heard that Steve Jobs used to give battling Apple leaders one day to work it out, or be fired. That made the point. It sent the message. But there had to be consequences.

So when and how can you help two leaders work it out?

Here is a five step process the coach can walk them through:

Acceptance of the urgency of the situation
Understanding of the consequences of failure to collaborate
Common objectives that they agree on
Shared outcomes they can work toward
Development of a communications plan

This last piece is often ignored, but that is a mistake, because agreements can be ignored unless they are communicated. As I say to the people dealing with a feud, the speed of this process is critical. If you don't resolve it right now you jeopardize morale, alienate talent, scuttle projects, damage reputations, delay sales, and jeopardize customer relationships.

Get them out or get them a coach. Otherwise, they will not only be "history" you will be left to explain decisions that you don't want to defend.

The “IT and the Business” Paradox: Organizational Leadership Unity

Mon, 22 Oct 2012 20:09:00 GMT

Some years ago, a senior IT leader was leading a project that ran amuck. Over budgeted by nearly a million dollars, there were significant, unanticipated, unresolved issues and recrimination was sweeping the function. Morale was sinking, the leadership team was warring, and it appeared the IT leader was not acknowledging the magnitude of the problem. The VP of Human Resources called to see if we could help.

After surveying the organization and interviewing the leadership team, we quickly isolated a few factors in the debacle. As you undoubtedly guessed, the overwhelming issue was a lack of communication. There was no clarity around the procedures, outcomes, or timelines. There were no regular meetings among the teams, and communication with the business was sporadic. When IT people tried to sound the alarm about issues, they were aware the message wasn’t reaching the CIO. Her own team leaders were hushing up the problems and blaming each other’s teams.

To make matters worse? The CEO at this point still had virtually no idea how bad things were. Why is that a bad thing? Because of course, he found out.

It hadn’t started as a deliberate “cover-up.” Most people in the IT organization had the best of intentions. But as the situation spiraled into a crisis, and the CIO was still hoping to fix it before she reported back to the CEO.

As the saying goes, hope is not a strategy.

When a project is in trouble, at the first sign, it is time to speak up. You have to be frank and forthcoming with your senior colleagues, or you are putting a trusted relationship at risk. Once you lose that trust, it is hard to win it back. It takes years to build, and minutes to ruin. More important, long before there is trouble, the communication plan has to be clear.

Earning a seat at the table of course begins with alignment between IT and the rest of the organization around the business imperatives, including strategic goals. Then there must be absolute agreement on expectations, metrics, deadlines, how you will deal with conflict, and of course, outcomes and benefits. It isn’t enough to get it right at the beginning. Communication has to be constant, and must include a feedback loop – multiple-channel communication- with all stakeholders – from the team to the businesses to the C-level.

Martha Heller’s new book, The CIO Paradox, brilliantly highlights the challenges that CIOs face as partners in the business. Earning a seat at the table is a perennial topic at CIO gatherings. Why is it such a challenge for so many CIOs to get shoulder to shoulder with the rest of the executive team? Well, for starters, technology speaks a different language, operates in a different culture, and faces different complexities, as Heller points out. This creates a mentality of separation. “We don’t say ‘finance and the business’ or ‘sales and the business’ or even ‘HR and the business,” says Heller. “Clearly there is something about IT that causes uncertainty and confusion among the members of the executive committee.”

Uncertainty and confusion goes both ways. Sure, many CEOs don’t “get” how IT can be the greatest ally to the business. They don’t understand what an impact technology can have in creating efficiencies and cost-savings, innovations, even new products and services that generate significant revenue.

However, very often it is also the CIO mindset that keeps the technology leader from becoming a full-fledged partner. You cannot offer value if you view yourself as at all separate. If you allow a separate mentality to creep into your own thinking, you can be sure it will also live in your organization.

I say this with all due respect, because technology leaders are among the most exceptional, talented, collaborative, brilliant leaders I’ve ever worked with. Yet often they become discouraged and beaten down by the daily battles. They tire of the criticism and get sick of the corporate blame game. Their battle scars are written all over their faces. This is why of all the paradoxes Heller names in her book, this one is the hardest to resolve.

When a CIO has the “right” mindset, he or she becomes a most trusted confidante of a CEO and senior team. I remember the CIO who taught me a lot about this. He was so effective communicating the business imperatives, and his values, that everyone I ever spoke with in his organization could repeat them to me, and did. He also set the expectation to over-communicate with each other, and their business counterparts. Everyone knew the goals, metrics, timelines and outcomes. They were evaluated by how well they aligned their activities around those. They were applauded when they elevated issues. They were expected to acknowledge and resolve conflicts. When a project did hit a bump, everybody in IT knew what to do and who to call because they were in constant communication.

The mindset of the CIO is the mindset that will permeate the IT organization. The right mindset will inspire you to go above and beyond, which includes creating a robust communications plan. Set the expectation –no one should assume he or she has communicated enough. Reinforce the partnership mindset.

80% of your time as a CIO should be spent on communication.

Heller recommends that you revisit some communication basics. Here are a few of her tips:

Downsize reports
Don’t hold too many IT only meetings
Live and die by your communications calendar
Get rid of the jargon, once and for all
Borrow your metaphors from the business
Give your organization a motto

I strongly recommend this book, not only for IT leaders and aspiring leaders, but for everyone in the C-Suite. If you’re an IT professional, purchase two copies, and give one of them to your CEO.

About the author: Suzanne Bates is CEO of Bates Communications, a strategy firm that drives business results with powerful communication. She is the author of three best-selling business books-Speak Like a CEO, Motivate Like a CEO, and Discover Your CEO Brand. Bates provides executive coaching, consulting and leadership development for C-Suite and emerging senior leaders. Their clients are leaders in world-class companies including American Express, Dow Chemical, State Street, Fidelity, Kimberly Clark, Met Life, and EMC.

Self-Determination: Future Leaders of The United States

Tue, 16 Oct 2012 13:08:00 GMT

If you were scanning the Economy section of the Wall Street Journal the other day you saw these headlines:

"Euro-Zone Nations Seen Falling Short"

"World Bank Cuts Asia Forecast"

"Banker Warns on Spain Budget"

"Fed Official Warns Inflation Won't Cure Debt Woes"

"Factory Orders Fell 5.2% in August"

It appears that nowhere in the world is there an engine of economic growth. China is slowing down. Europe continued to fumble along. US companies have issued conservative if not downright pessimistic forecasts. And whatever you thought about Jack Welch's scathing analysis of the government's report on unemployment (he makes a case in the WSJ last week for how implausible the numbers are) there is no doubt that our economy is treading water.

I have affectionately dubbed this fall "restructuring season" because of the number of companies where leaders are behind closed doors, sweating through budget planning, realigning around "reality," which translates to reductions in workforce, closing offices and facilities, flattening organizations and facing off differently with customers. When in doubt, shuffle the deck.

Much of this restructuring needs to happen. It's good to shake things up. It's just that a ton of energy, angst and time is going into this effort. Once through it, I hope that these same companies and leaders will pivot. We need to set our sights on growing our way to prosperity.

If you are like me, you are sick of the gloom and doom. I am ready to make a prediction. I believe the US will lead the world out of this long, tiresome economic malaise. Because we are a nation built on self-determination.

We rise up and overcome challenges. It is our DNA. That is who we are. We don't like to be told it can't be done, or that some other country, or region, or outside force will determine our fate. At the moment we have intractable federal debt, unacceptable unemployment, and distressingly high gas prices. We are buffeted by the economic woes of other global regions.

But for heaven's sake people, this nation was built on self-determination. We have the will and the know-how to choose our path and determine our future. When we meet an obstacle, we redouble our effort and renew our commitment. This country saved the world from tyranny. We are a beacon of hope for the rest of the world. People come to our shores every day because they believe opportunity abounds. It does. If we are the nation we say we are, then as leaders, we must lead the way.

My money is on us, to accelerate the global economy and drive a recovery forward. That means that as business leaders, we must be prudent, but we must also take risks. We must protect our resources, and also redeploy them to explore new markets, find new opportunities and push innovations.

As someone who has worked with business leaders now for well more than a decade, I don't think the problem is a vision for the future. I think it is making sure everybody is on board and we have ignited their passion to take risks and think big. It means getting out of our offices, figuratively and literally, to communicate a vision of greatness with the people who have to make it happen.

When people in the organization know exactly what must be done, and they believe in the plan, they are excited. They are excited, they become focused. When they are focused, they accelerate. When they accelerate, they get results. Results fuel commitment. Commitment sparks belief in ourselves --the powerful force of self-determination.

As leaders, we have the ability, and the responsibility, to unleash the forces of self-determination in our companies and in our nation. If we do, then collectively American business will lead the way.

Oatmeal: Maintaining Your Company Brand Abroad

Tue, 09 Oct 2012 16:37:00 GMT

Sitting in a lovely restaurant in the South of France, the morning sun cast a band of light on the water so glistened like diamonds. The sky was so blue, the air so warm, the light so blinding, I was sure nothing could possibly mar the tranquility.

That's precisely when a gravelly male voice broke through. "Oatmeal!" I looked over at the table next to mine where a bear-gutted, red-eyed businessman was stuffing a linen napkin into his collar. "Oatmeal!" he sneered again at the French waiter who was bending in to listen. "OAT-MEEE-AHL," he repeated as if the man were stupid or deaf. "Do you understand OH-A-T-MEAL!!!!"

At that, the poor hapless server scurried to the nearby register to confer with his manager and another waiter. They were equally perplexed. Did I mention that the hotel restaurant had a massive, gourmet buffet breakfast? Omelets made to order, buttery chocolate croissants, 27 cheeses and 32 meats, fresh fruits, cold cereal, sausages, scrambled eggs, bacon, and delicious fried potatoes. Just about everything BUT oatmeal. If you had spent 42 seconds at the buffet you'd have seen that. I'm not sure the French even eat oatmeal. Who can blame them? No matter whether it’s Quaker, instant, or steel-cut, mush falls short of the definition of fine cuisine.

The manager returned, explaining he was terribly sory, they had no "porridge," so the sorry sack invoked his spouse. "My wife wants oatmeal," he declared. Just then the skinny little thing turned up. "I am trying to get you oatmeal," he declared as she shuffled by, indifferent to his husbandly effort. "I thought that was what you would want."

That's when I noticed his name tag. He was obviously attending an international banking conference at the convention center next door. I presume this U.S. bank sent him to gain an education about doing business abroad, maybe to meet and impress international bankers. I got to wondering, had they sent him through an international business etiquette course? If so, maybe they could get their money back. The only thing that course taught him was to make sure his passport was up-to-date.

I spent the rest of the morning with a great group of international consultants, friends, who collectively converse in French, German, Japanese, plus the varieties of English-Australian, British, Canadian, and of course good -'ol American. (I am not multi-lingual, but thankfully they are). It was lovely. Yet I couldn't escape the specter of this businessman, who I fear will be remembered by the hotel staff as...a typical American.

If we are truly to become respected global companies, we still have work to do when we send out our emissaries, to make sure we project a kinder, gentler, more respectful demeanor abroad. This wasn't my only encounter with American ATTITUDE. The very next day, while waiting in a long line to check out, a middle-aged American couple approached me abruptly from behind and asked impatiently, "Is this check-in or check-out?" When I replied that I was waiting to check OUT, they walked right in front of me and collared a roving front desk clerk. He looked sheepishly at me and said, "I'm sorry, I am moving them through because this is a check-IN." I knew he had made up that policy on the spot to keep them from imploding. He knew I wouldn't object.

Look, Americans don't have the corner on rude behavior. It’s everywhere. But that's no excuse. When we travel we represent our country, its institutions, government, culture, and way of life. We represent our companies, too. We are the avatars. The world doesn't owe us special treatment. Sure, U.S. English is now standard around the world. But that doesn't give us the right to lord it over other people.

I’m home now, looking at a can of as-yet-uncooked, steel-cut oatmeal in my pantry. I suppose I will cook it and eat it, to make up for a few too many croissants, but I won't be able to sit down for breakfast without thinking about that guy. I hope if you are sending your people abroad that you will take this time to forward this little story to them. Afterall they are ambassadors. Their actions reflect your company brand and the integrity of your corporate culture.

Living the Dream:Telling Your Story

Mon, 01 Oct 2012 16:45:00 GMT

I was dining alone in a Sheraton in Brooklyn, I think the name of the place was Grubsteak. It was too late to go out with an early morning speech so I settled on a Blue Moon and a burger (no bun, no fries) and sautéed spinach. Other than the spinach, It turned out to be a pleasant meal. My waitress, Fatima, was lovely. As I was getting ready to go, I asked, “So, what’s your story? Why are you here?”

She looked surprised but answered directly, “Well, I’m actually a make-up artist,” “Really, that’s great.” “Yes, I’m starting to get some great clients. In fact, I’ve worked on a couple of movies. I feel good. In fact, I’m hoping to leave here soon, so I can go full time.”

I left her a ten dollar tip for an eighteen dollar meal, which won’t get her a ticket out of the Sheraton, but may be a little sign from the universe to pursue that dream.

The next day it just so happened that my speech on Discover Your Brand was to dreamers. They were almost all entrepreneurs. Not my typical crowd, but great people, many with solo businesses that need their own brands.

“How many of you were told by your parents to just work hard, and success (and money) will follow?” I asked. Every hand went in the air. “How many of you think that’s all it takes?” Of course the answer is – it can’t be. Lots of hard working people never make it. And most of them are good at what they do, they just don’t do enough to tell their stories and make themselves known.

For example, a woman named Pamela snagged me to tell me she was trying to figure out the brand for her start-up -a software technology - actually a game that helps chronically ill patients manage their diseases.

I asked her to tell me her story. It turns out a couple of years ago she was diagnosed with pancreatitis, a chronic disease that kills. She was whisked from graduate school to the acute care center in the hospital where she learned she was one of three patients with a similar diagnosis. The other two died within weeks. She decided to live. She collared every doctor, specialist, nurse, minister and rabbi to learn everything about it. Defying the odds and her own doctor’s prognosis, she hobbled out of the hospital on Labor Day, with a still uncertain prognosis. She refused to succumb by Thanksgiving or Christmas as they warned she might. Instead, she finished her graduate thesis, which became the basis for her business plan. She already has United Health as an investor.

Here’s what’s crazy. I asked if she had shared her story with the investors she’s approaching. “No!” she replied. “I never really made that connection!” So, I had he get up and tell her story to the group. They had tears in their eyes. Afterword, she was positively giddy. “I’ve got my story!” she proclaimed. The next time she goes out to talk to investors, I predict they’ll be pulling out their checkbooks. There are 30 million people in the US suffering from chronic illness. That’s a market. And with a story like that, she has a pretty good shot at standing out among other entrepreneurs.

It’s funny how sometimes we just don’t think to tell our stories. Think how powerful it is when you hear one like that. A story connects with hearts and minds. People want to hear your voice. In telling your story, you connect with your audience on a deeper level.

Didn’t get Fatima’s last name, and didn’t get her whole story, but I hope just the same, that she does tell it to some people who can do something to support her dream, too.