Truth be told, there are some children who merely exist this week.  Sadly, they have little to nothing to be thankful for.  They are away from their homes, family and routines.  Even if the environment they come from is unsafe and unhealthy, it is what they know.  Now imagine being transplanted into the lives of unknown people, however good, involved in activities that are completely foreign.  Children who have experienced abuse and neglect in their home are often afraid of healthy family activities simply because they don’t understand.  This doesn’t make them ungrateful. Sometimes, it takes years or even a lifetime for these children to be thankful for anything.  It only means that they have experienced a profound trauma and what they need is understanding.  Helping them feel included while not forcing them to be someone they are not, is vital.  If they are younger, they may just need to be held.  Older children may need enough space to experience the silent presence of someone who cares.  Many children this week might just be thankful for a safe place to hurt, mourn, emotionally wrestle and cry without being forced to BE thankful. Can you offer that place?

Thousands of children in foster care struggle around the holidays.  No amount of turkey and gifts can heal the brokenness they feel inside.  Their greatest need is to experience The Savior who alone can heal all their pain and brokenness.  Will you consider being Christ’s ambassador through foster care and adoption?

4 The Kids,

Ryan

Ride the lift

Take the easy road

Make it convenient

It is too difficult to climb

You were made for flat ground

We care about you

While few still climb, those few still remain.  Climb on!

Fast-forward more than 25 years. Today, as I was driving through a parking lot, I briefly stopped in front of a store to allow exiting customers to pass.  A woman came strolling out of the store.  Normally, I wouldn’t have noticed, but something caught my eye.  Attached below her knees were two (that’s right, TWO) prosthetic legs with running shoes attached.  Her gait was normal, and besides the obvious structural difference, everything was ordinary.  All I could think was “Awesome!”

Today, I appreciate those who stare down adversity, and I understand and value diversity.  However, that appreciation hasn’t always existed within me.  It takes a conscious effort and significant humility (aka – getting humbled) to be inspired by those who overcome formidable obstacles and achieve great things.  Unfortunately, our world would rather mock those who are disabled, impaired or different.  My question to you is: Are you inspirable?

Some fans go too far with their obsessions.

http://bit.ly/nqOS9f

Tech

Pickup lines from techies take LAME to a new level!

http://bit.ly/qFyMfR

Business

Hot dogs can’t be that important.

http://fxn.ws/qFQzGN

Social Media Marketing

If I couldn’t use social media at work, I might die!

http://bit.ly/nYc2zH

Foster Care

Befriending a cockroach is sad. (Can you help with this problem?)

http://bit.ly/qUrheW

Pregnancy

Yep,  that says HYPNOBirthing!

http://bit.ly/nHnLpF

Art

Mary Poppins is real!

http://tnw.co/qcfxEe

Culture

Bert and Ernie are not gay according to Sesame Street.

http://on.fb.me/n6hsnr

Tech

Whiteboards may not die like chalkboards.

http://bit.ly/qdV2Bc

Faith

Even ducks teach us about God.

http://bit.ly/nlm00p

Social Media Marketing

Coming up with content isn’t that difficult after all.

http://bit.ly/qlVhpP

Foster Care

Wimpy excuses don’t cut it for not doing foster care.

http://bit.ly/pWVeUo

April 20, 2007

Being a daddy is:
One of the greatest honors of my life.
The most humbling experience I have ever had.
Pure Joy!
The greatest responsibility.
Fear to the greatest degree.
Love, like I have never experienced.
Hope of the future.

I pray that God gives me the courage to be the daddy He wants me to be.

I love you Jacob, Gaige, Baby J & Micah

She leaned against my leg, begging in silence to be held and comforted.

Her small dress was yellow, and she, like so many other children, was waiting. I noticed her as I walked by. I could have kept going, BUT something inside me told me to stop. When she first noticed me, she was shy. Having endured what she has endured in her short time on earth, I can understand why. As I spoke softly to her and showed her my eyes, she timidly walked towards me. She leaned against my leg, begging in silence to be held and comforted.

As I picked her up, she relaxed and laid her head on my shoulder. We soon found ourselves sitting on the floor playing. I showed her pictures of my babies, and she showed me her toys. Not long afterwards, she was again in my lap, wrapping her arms around my neck. A short time later, as I left that room, I placed my hand on her head. I wish she could have felt the love and blessings I was pleading with God to pour down on her life, soul and being.

Hours later, I hurt. I hurt for the souls of all the children who have suffered more disruption and loss in their moments here on earth than most of us will endure in a lifetime. I am pained by all those children that move throughout our lives, churches, and community that never get to be held, whether it be physically, emotionally or spiritually.

If we walk by that room, we deny Jesus to that child.

Kids, especially those kids, walk through life looking for Jesus. If you dare to, you can see it in their eyes. Through their brokenness and pain they are begging to see Him.

He was one who would stop everything and let the children come to Him.

When we open our arms, our lives and our homes to these children, we reflect THE loving and caring Savior to them. We open a door for them to experience the ONLY thing that will heal their wounded and broken lives. They are looking for Jesus, TODAY. Will they see Him in you?

I met a child today.

“The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.’ – Matthew 25:40

Every day that I walk into my office at a Christian child placement agency, I am challenged by some very real statistics. Each year, more than 400,000 children are in foster care in the United States. Over 100,000 of them are available for adoption right now. My work involves inviting Christian people to join in the ministry of James 1:27 by caring for the children in this world who need to see Jesus more than ever. Today is the day for the Church to answer the call of thousands of children and live ministry rather than just talk about it!

I, by no means, have fatherhood figured out.  Most days I wouldn’t consider myself to be good at my job at all.  My kids frequently find my weak points and lack of patience.  However, there are three things that Amanda and I strive towards to help our sons be successful in life and faith.  We do this work and ministry as a team! So when I talk about parenting, I always say WE.

Proverbs 3:12

because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.

Discipline – As foster parents, we have to answer a lot of questions about how we parent.  The response we get when explaining our philosophy of discipline often gets a caseworker’s attention.  We have no hesitance in telling people that we have HIGH expectations of our boys.  When we say HIGH, we don’t mean unreasonable or unattainable.  If a child is going to excel, they have to have the bar placed slightly above their comfort level.  If they don’t have to try, they will never succeed.   We also impress upon our children that there is a standard.  It is one that none of us gets to create.  Our faith calls us to follow the Bible as the guidebook for how we are to live our lives.  It is fair because we have to follow the same standard.  It holds us accountable because we, as parents, lose our credibility if  we live as a hypocrites.  Without a standard, children will grow up making their own rules, and as a result, will create conflict in every corner of their lives.  When they make mistakes, consistent discipline calls for a punishment that is fair, appropriate, immediate and done respectfully.  Afterwards there is ALWAYS unconditional forgiveness and a clean slate.  This not only teaches a child how to ultimately become “self disciplined,” but also teaches them continuously about the nature of God.  As a result, discipline is essentially an education in how to love God, love others and love self.  To discipline is to teach.  Teaching without discipline is negligent. We are committed to discipline!

1 Peter 1:8

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy,

Joy – Many people define Joy as Fun.  While fun is definitely part of the equation (and don’t be mistaken…we have LOTS of fun!), it is possible to have joy when there is no fun in sight.  The foundation of this joy is hope. We teach our boys that there is much more beyond the temporary delight of fun.  In our mistakes, struggles, pains and heartaches, there is something much more solid than our pursuit of self-serving pleasure.  There is joy in putting hope in an eternal existence with a Heavenly father that cares and provides for us beyond what we can imagine.  There is joy in serving others even when it causes us discomfort because it enriches the life of another and shows the compassion of God.  There is joy in having confidence in something that will not and cannot fail us.  Forgiveness continually provides joy in discipline.  Children thrive in a structured environment where they can grow and joy is produced out of excelling beyond the expectations you have for them.  Knowing that family is an eternal word rather than a temporary one gives comfort and overwhelming joy.  We don’t expect our boys to be joyful.  We expect that it will be a natural bi-product of a life that is eternally and outwardly focused.  Joy comes from the spirit of God living in you.  We train our boys to love God and allow His spirit to guide them.  We continually rejoice as we experience their joy from the time that they wake up in the morning to the last laugh of the day! Life without joy is not living at all.  We want to LIVE!

1 John 4:7

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.

Love – The foundation of all parenting is love.  Love is not something that we feel.  To quote the old song “It is something that we do.”  It is not a biological connection.  The connection of the soul is much greater than any connection that exists.  Being created in the image of God is one of the greatest sacrificial acts of love God, who IS love, ever committed.  We strive to let our boys know that same sacrificial love through the daily outpouring of ourselves for their spiritual and physical benefit.  Actions speak louder than words, but that should never diminish the importance of looking your children in the eye and proclaiming your never-ending love for them.  Without love, there will be no discipline and certainly no joy.  Parenting without true love is not only obsolete but toxic to all.  We choose love!

Deuteronomy 4:4-7

⁴ Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one.^{[a] 5} Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. ⁶ These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. ⁷ Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Our parenting journey is just beginning.  In just a few months, we will renew our lifelong commitment to parenting with the arrival of Micah.  While I’m sure strategy will change slightly with more children, unique personalities and age, I feel confident that the principles will never change. As long as we are parents, our children (and future children) can be assured that we will seek their physical and spiritual success through discipline, joy and love.  I pray God continues to guide us in our parenting as he parents our souls towards eternity!

In the midst of it all we have had a lot of people praying for us.   Many have called, sent texts, written Facebook messages, or told us as much, and that has been a GREAT BLESSING.  I don’t know that we could navigate these waters alone, without the many people asking God to guide our lives.  Not to make light of any one of those prayers, but there has been one that has stood out from the rest.  For months, I have been receiving text messages at all hours of the day and night.  Dozens of them.  Not too long ago, at 3:07am I got a text, rolled over, blurry eyed and looked at the screen.  All it said was “Still.”  It was at that moment that I understood the meaning of 1 Thessalonians 5:17, and I rejoiced with tears in my eyes.

I don’t know about you, but I have been guilty of telling someone “I prayED” for you. While I am sure it was a blessing and comfort to that individual and confident that God heard it, I have failed repeatedly to pray without ceasing.  There has been more than once in my life where I felt overwhelmed by the number of things I needed to pray for that I quickly checked things off a list and never returned to pray for them again.  For that I am sorry.  Prayer is one of the most important things for a follower of Christ.  It is the way we communicate with God and a way we can bless the lives of others by speaking to God on their behalf.  If we do this occasionally, we cheat both ourselves and our fellow man.  If we put an “ED” on the end of it, all we have done is missed a great opportunity.

As you pray, go with the “ing.”  May “Still” be our encouragement to others as we share the blessing of prayer.

For all of you who have prayed for and are praying for our family….THANK YOU!!!

Time: 3:30pm

Blend Name: Unknown

Aroma: bold with a hint of berry.

Body: Moderate

Flavor – Oaky with a little nutmeg

Acidity: slightly bitter

Aftertaste: pleasant

Age: Unknown

Cost: $2:18 Packaging: General Dixie coffee cup and lid that you can buy in bulk at Sam’s or Costco

Atmosphere: Drive thru brick hut on the side of the road. There are two lanes on either side. It is off the main road but near two hotels.  I believe they picked this location to serve all the oil workers who stay at the hotel.

Service: Attendant was friendly.  When I asked if there was any fresh coffee, he seemed surprised to find some (not sure if that was a good sign or not). He also gave me a Mountain Mudd “Club Card” that entitles me to every 10th cup of coffee free.

Notes: This is another place that I have not visited in my time here. The price is high and I was worried when I found out Cool Beans is owned by Mountain Mudd.

Conclusion: Not the perfect cup of coffee BUT it was surprisingly good!  The bitterness was offset by the flavor and although it wasn’t a strong as I like it, it definitely ranks in the top 5 for the town.