I feel like the past 18 months have been a blur. I don’t want this to be a laundry list of everything that has gone on in my personal life, so I will just leave it at this – I am so glad that 2017 is here! A new year means a new page in my book of life. I am ready to start this new chapter fresh, and ready to embrace all that this year has to offer!

6 swims, 6 walks, 12 hours, all across the Scilly Isles – which are off the southern England coast of Cornwall, in the Atlantic Ocean…

Considering that I haven’t been swimming much (read: about three times) since my husband broke his hip in August, it is time to get started on the training. I reckon a good solid 30 weeks of training will get me to the start line in good shape and ready to succeed.

So I jumped back into the pool yesterday.

It is hard to start again. I think the hardest part was turning off my mean girl inner monologue “wow you sure have gotten slow” “wow you used to be able to do this without getting out of breath now look at you” and just focusing on where I am now, how I feel now, and knowing that (with work) I can and will get back to where I was.

I left the pool feeling remarkably good.

In the coming weeks in addition to getting back in the water with more consistency, I will be laying out my training blocks. I’m super excited to work with our club coach Lorcan to develop my plan – this is my first time self coaching myself to a big swim so I’m really looking forward to that challenge too!

And… I’ll blogging my way through it all. It has been a long time since I blogged consistently, and this seems like the perfect time – and reason – to get back into writing again Just like when I started to blog – chronically my way toward a big challenge.

Here’s to 2017 Goals!

First, how crazy is it that it is already November? Then again, my life since mid-August *has* been rather crazy, so maybe it’s not so surprising that time has flown?!

The big news is that my fractured hipster husband is now the healed hipster (recovered hipster?!) and is walking again! I am super proud of his dedication to recovering – including hours of physio each day – and in my head I saw him going for a walk with me and our dog Felix on my birthday in November. But he exceeded expectations! He went for a few 3km (and one 5km) walk this past weekend. Amazing!

This means that slowly life will be returning to its normal schedule. I got back in the pool to swim with Red Top Swim yesterday – my first Red Top Swim since August! Talk about a painful re-entry. But it was so nice to be swimming again. I am going to sit down for a date with my calendar to figure out a good training plan for the coming months, and am definitely planning on swimming making a strong return to my weekly training!

What else is new & good?

For those of you who subscribe to my newsletter, you will know that I started a course on health coaching with the Institute of Integrative Nutrition in March. Well, I have hit the halfway point of the course and continue to learn (especially from my amazing course mates).

If you are at all interested in helping me to practice and develop my skills as a coach, please get in touch! I am happy to do an initial consultation with people, and will be looking to work with a few people (for free, no strings attached) for a period of four months as well, to go through a programme cycle. If you are interested you can email me donna@beatinglimitations.com

Called it synchronicity, call it a quest to learn how to make increasingly delicious food, call it a part of my neverending quest to find balance in life, but I also started a course in macrobiotics in September. I signed up to learn from Simon Brown not only about the food (which I love, and which draws on some of my favourite parts of Japanese home cooking), but also to deepen my understanding of Asian philosophies. And did I mention, the food? I am looking forward to more hands on experiences making some delicious wholesome food. Like this simple, delicious, warming and seasonal apple dessert.

I am posting the recipes that I love over on my Beating Limitations Facebook group, if you are interested in joining – please do!

And as I continue the path of exploring health coaching, I have also taken the decision to continue to deepen and further my education and experiences. Stay tuned for more and exciting news on that subject.

And finally, new & good in the world of paratriathlon

Although I took the decision this  year to take the step back from competitive racing to protect my knees – walking became a priority, and racing was threatening that for me – I am still involved in the world of paratriathlon.

I was elected to serve another term as the Triathlon England London region paratriathlon coordinator, and am working hard on our regional paratriathlon day for coaches and clubs. Set for January 28th I hope this will be a great chance to share learning and experiences so that we can effectively grow and create opportunities for athletes in the London region.

If you are interested in staying informed about all things paratriathlon in London and the UK, let me know. I am setting up a newsletter for my position, and would love to add people to my list.

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This month’s Spotlight is on Donna DeWick, a seriously tough cookie when it comes to training, whether it be swim, bike, run or in the gym!

Passionate about all things training, read on to discover her trials and tribulations, what training means to her and how she over-comes her own very personal obstacles…

T) Hi Donna! Many thanks for doing this interview with me!

D) No problem, Tim!

T) Having been raised in Hawaii, I expect water sports were a big part of your early life!! Were you a pool-swimmer as well as an open-water swimmer? Did you partake in other sports when you were younger?

D) I was a complete beach bum growing up, but far from sporty! I had some serious knee issues from about the age of 9, so the doctors actually advised me NOT to do any sport. So instead of organised sport, I spent a lot of time body surfing and body boarding, and reading my school work on the beach. But… I was on the junior varsity bowling team!

T) You’re known as being a keen triathlete as well as a stand-alone OW swimmer. What first at-tracted you to triathlon?

D) Back in 2006 we moved to a house with a lot of stairs. Going up and down the stairs all the time started to feel difficult for me, due to my nerve disease Charcot Marie Tooth, and I had developed what I called “frankenlegs” – a feeling of permanent stiffness in my legs. With the swim-bike-run elements basically equaling total body conditioning, triathlon seemed like a great way to get strong-er and to become more able – to get comfortable climbing my stairs. I bravely hit the register button for my first race after a friend that I shared my plans with told me she would help me with my first tri. That was the London Triathlon at the Excel Centre in 2007.

T) Life for you includes managing 2 health conditions, namely Charcot Marie Tooth disease and Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. Can you summarise their symptoms and explain how they affect you in both a day-to-day sense as well as a sporting environment?

D) Charcot Marie Tooth impacts 1 in 2500 people. It is a problem of the nerves – my myelin protein forms incorrectly, meaning my nerves do not transmit signals well. This leads to progressive degenerative muscle atrophy and loss of mobility, from the extremities (hands and feet) to the core.

CMT means that for me, anything with speed is tough. Think of it this way – if a normal person has 10 nerve cells firing a muscle, maybe I only have between 1 and 4 functioning cells doing the same job. And if a normal person has nerves that are at Autobahn speeds, mine struggle to get above the school zone limits. With raw speed not my strength, I have had to focus on developing good technical ability.

I also lack a push function in my calves, due to muscle atro-phy, and struggle with tendonitis in my ankles. This means that running is exceptionally difficult for me.

Ehlers Danlos Syndrome is a connective tissue disorder. Es-sentially, my collagen is flawed. I have hypermobile type EDS meaning that my joints are loose and can dislocate easi-ly (I alluded to this when I mentioned my knee problems grow-ing up, I have also had major reconstructive surgery on my elbow in 2007). I have crossover symptoms with classical EDS, meaning I can have an erratic or exceptionally high heart rate (my max. heart rate on a track was about 210!) and that my blood pressure may not regulate right, meaning that I can pass out easily. This is particularly fun to manage in the context of a triathlon when you jump from horizontal to vertical in transition one…

I think EDS has given me the most to manage when it comes to sport. I find understanding where my body is in space quite challenging, so developing the good technique to compensate for the CMT lack of speed is vital – but learning good tech-nique can be hard for me. EDS also means that it can be hard to build muscle – and incredibly easy to lose it. So I do lots of functional strength training. EDS also means that when I do get injured – for example when I tore my suprasprinatus ten-don in July 2015 – it can take me a long time to rebuild and heal.

You can always read more about me, sport, CMT and EDS on my blog, beatinglimitations.com

T) How important is sport and exercise to you in terms of managing your health, both physically and mentally?

D) As neither of my medical conditions has a cure, exercise, quite literally, is my medicine. I use exercise to manage the impacts of CMT and EDS on my life. And honestly, I am definitely way better physically today than I was growing up. The doctors were clearly wrong in advising me to stay clear of sport! Thank goodness the advice has now evolved so kids don’t wind up like me – now kids with EDS and CMT are encouraged to discover the joy and power of sport from an early age.

T) In 2015 you represented USA at the World Paratriathlon Open Championships across the Sprint distance, and in 2014 you competed in the ITU Paratriathlon Elite field. You also got on the podium! Talk us through this awesome race experience and result!

D) In 2013 after a terrible knee problem which flared after doing a 5km run on New Year’s Day, I received the medical advice to stop doing all triathlons or to face a total knee replacement. With the help of a great sports rehab doctor, I was able to get back to a decent level of sport.

When my classification in parasport was validated before the elite race I did (the 2014 ITU World Paratriathlon Event in Chicago) I felt truly humbled. Also scared. I mean, have you seen how small a TYR compression suit is before you put it on?! How was I going to fit into my Team USA kit?!

Racing for the USA in Chicago in 2014, and then again at Worlds in 2015, was a true honour. I love paratriathlon, as honestly I believe that triathlon was the path that helped me to reclaim my health. And to represent my home country on home soil was just amazing.

It was hard in 2015, though. It was my third season racing with my knees in very bad shape. Toeing the line to start, I knew that I would rely on a run-walk strategy to finish. And not everyone was accepting of this – including some of my fellow paratriathletes. With my knee troubles, finishing was a triumph. And the podium? The podium was a gift. And in its own way, the podium was also a sign.

I like to leave a party on a high note, when things are still in full swing and while everyone is still laughing. That bronze in 2015 was my sign. Worlds was the last time I would race for USA Par-atriathlon. Now I’m just a fan

T) What do you feel has been your most enjoyable sporting achievement? I ask this because for many people simply repre-senting their country is the greatest achievement, but I feel for you that something like the satisfaction of swimming a distance without your wetsuit, or perhaps a stunning open-water swim such as the Monte Cristo event might top it?

D) Hmm… Most enjoyable moment. That is tough! The most en-joyable moments for me are the ones when I have felt the edge and gone past my own perceived limits. There are different mo-ments that stick in my mind. Like when I went to a cycle training camp in Spain. I was a complete newbie and went on a hard core camp in 2011. I had no idea how hard riding up a mountain would be. That camp pushed me way beyond what I thought I could do, and indeed one of the pros on the camp quite literally pushed me (technical term: gave me an elevator ride) up an extremely hard climb. I sat at the top of the climb and cried. It was so hard, but I did it, with a lot of help and support.

And when I swam across the Chesapeake Bay. That was before I joined Red Top – and a key motivator for me in joining Red Top. On almost blind faith in my swimming abilities and a little training, I swam the 7km across the bay. The ship channel current in the middle of the swim was CRAZY. I had to learn really fast that to move forward, I needed to swim perpendicularly. It was a swim that was full of beautiful moments, that I did with a bunch of friends I met on Twitter where we all shared our swim training for the event, it was full of challenge, and I had such an enormous sense of accomplishment when I walked ashore.

And finally, when I did the West Reservoir swim in July this year without a wetsuit. I am prone to terrible cold cramping from my nerve disease, but after Croatia and the colder waters we had this year, I figured I could handle a race without my wetsuit. It was a real mind-over-body challenge. Although not long by any stretch, it was just as important as an endurance challenge for me, and it gave me the confidence in my body to do more and longer “proper” non-wetsuit swims in my future.

T) Do you feel that the legacy of 2012 (and indeed 2016) has helped paratriathlon in a similar way to that in which it has helped triathlon? Where do you see the future of Paratriathlon in the cap-ital and indeed on the national and international stage? Having been voted London Paratriathlete of the year in 2015 as well as having an audience at the Triathlon England London regional committee meeting earlier this year, you clearly have some clout!

D) Oh my. That’s a big question and one I could write an essay on! I’ll try to be brief… I think in the UK we have a unique opportunity for para-sport. The profile of the Paralympics here is HUGE. But for how large the opportunity could be, the sports themselves – and the media – have a long way to go to reach full potential.

What do I mean? In particular, for paratriathlon?

This year, the date and location for Paratriathlon National Championships were not announced until July. The race was in August. And the England National Championship held in 2015 was not of-fered again in 2016. From an opportunity to race perspective, this simply is not good enough. Brit-ish Triathlon knows this. I am optimistic that we can change the scope of opportunities to race in 2017. Because it is through good grassroots opportunities to race that the sport itself can devel-op.

I am hoping to build on the back of a successful debut of paratriathlon at the Paralympics to develop a Triathlon England London Region training day for coaches / tester day for athletes during this off season. This idea has been a long time in the making, now is the time to put it into action. If we can train club coaches and event organisers a bit in paratriathlon, that can help to in-crease possibilities for participation. Without participation there would not be sport!

T) For you, this year has been a season of consolidation and recharging the batteries. So, what’s next on the racing agenda as well as the bucket-list of ambitions?!

D) I’m not quite sure what next year will hold. I learned about the British Open Water Swim Nation-als a bit late this year. Maybe that is something to target in 2017?!

I’d love to do some iconic swims. Things like Gibraltar. Or the Scilly Isles swim that Juliette Bigley did. Or the Lanai to Maui ocean swim in my home state. The list seems endless.

But it all starts with getting back into the pool, which I hope to do very soon! I miss swimming!

T) Yes Donna, and we miss you at the pool too Many thanks for answering all those questions in such detail. Still can’t get over your 210 max heart rate!! See you on poolside… soon!!

Immediately after surgery, David messaged this to a friend of ours.

It has been important for us to quickly embrace the new reality, to shift perspectives FAST. It has been hard. Scary. Dramatic. Slowly, our new reality is becoming familiar. Less daunting. Finally, we are relaxing into things. Especially me.

I gave myself two weeks to adjust to the reality shift. Yesterday I started back to the gym. My plan is to get back to pilates on Monday next week, and then to also add in swimming again.

It’s all about finding balance in our new situation. It’s about David resting and recovering, healing his hip fracture – and it is about me figuring out how to be an efficient caregiver, and to be comfortable doing things solo, the things we used to share. I figure it will take time to re-establish routines – and I am okay with letting things slide. If that means skipping swimming in order to walk the dog, I am fine with that. It may take some time to figure out how to get back into routines, time to line up dog walkers so that I can hit the pool again, but that is fine. It’s not about being perfect and having it all figured out from day one – it’s about figuring things out, day by day, and adjusting to this new reality in a way that feels comfortable. For me, that means not feeling rushed or stressed, but able to breathe into the situation, to expand into my new role, and to enjoy it too. And yes, I am enjoying parts of this, especially the cooking!

And it’s about celebrating ALL of the wins. Each day brings new challenges AND new achievements. No matter what the achievement is, especially after such a huge dramatic TRAUMATIC event, it needs celebrating.

This is us, on date night on Saturday. David crutched from our house to Galvin, about 200m or so. And home. A huge achievement.

Celebrate success. And above all else, never forget that #loveheals.

I haven’t blogged since March. A lot has happened –  and not a lot. At the same time – if you know what I mean!

My 2016 Racing Season

I think my first big decision about my 2016 season was just before Easter, when I started to pull out of planned races. I logged a DNS (Did Not Start) at the Egg Hunt Triathlon. Something in my gut was telling me to pull back. To think twice about jumping in and just on reflex approaching 2016 like every other year since I started taking triathlon more seriously in 2009.

I suspect that “thing” that told me not to race was the same thing that saw me declare way back in January that my key goal for the forthcoming year was to do a swim race wetsuit free. Not to do XX race or complete something in YY time. I had already decided back in January to shift the nature of my goals completely, to focus on something that was at the same time familiar but new.

A Season of Rebuilding

I think this shift was a result of my shoulder injury. It has been a long time healing, but I am finally – FINALLY – there. Back to where I started from, back to July 2015, and only now feeling like I can start to build up to a goal again.

A Fallow Season?

As we sat there after swimming chatting in the sun, Juliette said to me that we all need a “fallow season” now and then, to rebuild and just enjoy being active without any goal pressure.

I have been mulling her phrase over in my head since then.

A fallow season.

I am still working and building, but my goals? Different now, things I don’t know if I would have thought of as “goals” before this injury. Like swimming wetsuit free, or pulling myself to vertical with stable shoulders.

I haven’t left being active behind. But I have definitely changed my purpose this season.

On the back of this fallow season, I sense something new is on the horizon… And I am ready.

I’ve teamed up with my friend Kendra from Strength/Flexibility/Health/EDS to shine some more light onto stories of hope, strength and perseverance – no matter how big or small the accomplishment.

Many times, taking a few extra steps each day or taking a shower is as of big of an accomplishment for some as finishing a triathlon is for others.

Within our community (meaning the EDS & chronic medical condition community) it’s important to support those who are fighting against tremendous obstacles to find the right diagnosis, to support those who are battling against incredible odds to find proper medical care, and especially to support those who are fighting to survive every day. AND, it’s equally as important to recognize and support those who have remained focused on the positive, despite incredible obstacles. It’s especially critical to cheer on those who are pushing the limits of what they CAN, as well as those who are finding out how to persevere in other ways.

I don’t think many people know of all of the incredible athletes we have in our community — Allysa Seely is one of them.

Allysa Seely is an elite paratriathlete representing the USA and working towards her dream of the Rio 2016 Paralympics. After her first triathlon in 2008 she began to lose sensation in her legs, and she began a two year process of figuring out what was happening to her body.  In 2010 she was diagnosed with a Chiari 2 Malformation, Basilar Invagination and Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, and soon after had brain and spine surgery.

After being told she would not walk again, Allysa worked her way back to compete in triathlon, with her first race post-surgery at Collegiate National Championships in 2011. After her success in rehabilitating from traumatic brain injury, extensive surgery, and racing again, Allysa faced another challenge in 2013 when the neurological damage to her left foot led to her decision to have her leg amputated below the knee. She went on from this to win the 2015 Paratriathlon World Championships in her category, PT2 (the most severely impaired paratriathletes who do not use a wheelchair and who are not visually impaired).

I make a choice to find happiness in every experience, this is not to say I have not gone through my fair share of struggles. Some days I feel like I have had more than my fair share of struggles, but I also realize how incredibly fortunate I am. I have had bad days, bad races, made silly mistakes that have cost me, I have struggled with a chronic and progressive illness among other health issues, and I deal with chronic pain day in and day out. None of this is ever easy, but because of my bad days, I appreciate the good and even the mediocre. More than that I make a choice to be proud of everything I have accomplished, everything I have learned from my mistakes and my bad days. I make a choice to find the best in every moment. I make a choice to not make excuses. I make a choice to be happy because at the end of the day why not be happy and grateful. Am I perfect? No, of course not, but my life has been imperfectly perfect.

Allysa’s first chance to secure a place in Rio 2016 Paralympics is this weekend on March 13th in Sarasota Florida at the Continental Americas Paratriathlon Championships. The race in Sarasota may be Allysa’s biggest race ever, as she needs a win to ensure she will compete in Rio. She faces stiff competition from former PT2 world champion and above-the-knee amputee Melissa Stockwell.

Sadly, we’ve heard people within our community dismiss the success of other EDSers by suggesting that their success is because they don’t suffer as much, or are only “mildly” affected. Both statements could or could not be true, but who are we to judge the suffering of someone else?

How do we know how much someone suffers? Solely by judging the way they look? Or by deciding what someone can and cannot do – what someone should or should not be able to do who has our same chronic condition?

Isn’t this the exact battle that the chronic/invisible illness community struggles with daily? If so, why would anyone subject individuals within our community to the same judgment we seek to eliminate, especially if their stories provide hope and something positive to read to balance out the sad?

Stories of perseverance from either the athletes with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome like Allysa do not discount the very real struggles and devastation that some in the EDS community face. These stories will not change another EDSers diagnosis – but the stories of strength and triumph bring us hope and a ray of positivity in what can sometimes seem insurmountable.

As a community, we need to ensure that we both support all struggles AND that we celebrate all triumphs  – big and small. Good luck Allysa – we are all cheering for you!

Allysa is a good friend of mine, one of the first paratriathletes I met at the 2012 US Paratriathlon national championships, and a constant source of advice and a great sounding board as I work my way through my own training and issues. She stayed with us during her 2015 season which brought her to London for the world series race in May. Felix, our dog, fell in love with her too. All of us – and especially Felix – wish you the very best this weekend Allysa!

But then on the walk home, I found myself feeling a bit overwhelmed and frankly a little scared. Fear loomed.

Was I biting off too much? Was I too ambitious? Would I be able to deliver my ideas?

I woke up this morning to an email from the Skinny Dip Society 10-day challenge (I signed up to this because I saw Sonja post a beautiful photo on Instagram and thought – hey! that looks like something I’d love doing!)

Anyway, that email… The challenge today was to burn up your fear. And after last night, the fear I needed to transform was that the task is too big for me to handle…

I mulled it over. How could I transform my fear. My fear that I have bitten off more than I can chew, that I won’t be able to deliver my promises? By adding a few simple words, I created a path toward success and instantly reduced my fears. I embedded a reminder to myself.

NO task is too big for me to handle – if I remember it’s ok to ask for support!

Support has been offered to me in lots of ways to help to transform my ideas into realities. I just need to remind myself that it is OK to follow up and ask. I do not have to climb this mountain alone – in fact, it will be a whole lot more fun the more people I can get on board… And lots of people WANT me to succeed.

Transforming fears. One word at a time!

Someday I will write about it, more than what I have already shared on the odd Facebook post, Instagram photo tribute, and this blog. When your last parent dies it is all just so final. And to have the person they chose to spend the end of their life with just shut you out is MEAN. But I’m not there yet. Not ready to peel the onion, to share all of the layers of hurt and to relive the emotions and the pain. Not yet, not in full.

But what I can share is that my experiences of “living in my post-dad world” have taught me a few things.

1. I am learning to draw the lines between acceptable and unacceptable behaviour, and learning that this is a key part of “keeping whole” when you are working through grief and hurt inflicted by others.

One of the best things said to me when I got back from the US in August was that I needed to find a path through the terrible acts done to us, the exclusion and the isolation and feeling robbed of time and space for grief, so that I would not lose myself in the process. So that I could keep my faith in the goodness of people, despite having this tread on in the most egregious of ways since dad died.

One of the things I have been exploring as a part of the healing around the hurt inflicted on us in the post-death process has been the practice of forgiveness.

I am not there yet – not ready to forgive the wrongs that have happened. I am not sure I can ever truly forgive the extra layer of pain that has been handed to us.

But understanding the boundaries of what I consider “right” and “wrong” has been a huge part for me in dealing with how I feel I have been treated.

From what I have read (although like I said I am not there yet in bringing this onboard into my healing process), by defining boundaries of “right” and “wrong”, when you eventually forgive you do not excuse the crossing of the boundaries.

This post on Tiny Buddha is a great walk through on how to explore forgiveness in situations that defy believe and which seem to cross the boundary of forgiveness.

When you decide what boundaries to put in to place, and what you will and won’t stand for, you release the fear that “it” will happen again. What “it” can touch you when you’ve already decided that you aren’t going to let it penetrate?

You can forgive an individual while keeping your boundaries intact. And by seeking to forgive you free yourself from the situation, the hurt.

This post on forgiveness by Phillip Moffitt really helped me to understand that I needed to define my rights and wrongs to get to the point of finding peace and not losing myself to the injustice I experienced:

If you hold on to a personal claim because of what you lost, you assume the identity of the victim. It may seem right and proper, but oftentimes it is just another form of self-imprisonment.

Both of those pieces are incredibly good and worth a read. And a re-read. I still reflect on them weekly.

It must be working a little. Last night I dreamed about letting go of the hurt, realising that I did not cause the way that I feel – but that I can control how I react to it. In my dream I did not lash out or yell at the person who has caused me so much pain. Instead I just told her she has fated herself to be alone because of her actions, whereas I am not alone no matter what is happening. I have my family. Love. My integrity. I can’t tell you how at peace I felt when I woke up from this dream. Stunned that it was not a nightmare. And pleased with my dream-self’s reactions.

2. Sometimes things are so awful that the only way to survive is through humour.

This past weekend I watched The Martian. If you haven’t seen the film, I loved it. Sure, it is a typical Hollywood movie in that the good guy always wins. But the build up and uncertainty in getting to that point kept me on the edge of my seat.

When faced with life or death, Matt Damon’s character decided to give his best and to fully commit to life. In a fairly dire situation he turned to humour as a survival mechanism.

My sister and I have done the same thing when it comes to grief and working our way through things following the saga of July. We recently went on a road trip to clear out the storage unit we took when we were asked to remove items from dad’s house. As a part of that process, we had to have a valuation of all items we had taken. Including the absurd decorations that my father collected, such as the Candy Man (part of his treasure trove of Hallowe’en things).

Since the Candy Man had already returned home with my sister and spent Hallowe’en with her family, we had to take him back to my father’s town. But rather than just chuck him into the trunk, we decided to take the Candy Man on a road trip. To take photos and to tell the story about the Candy Man’s trip back to northern Florida. One in which he road shot gun, in which he was valued as a part of dad’s estate, where he lost his head, and where he helped us to laugh through the grief and pain and finality of it all.

Thank god for humour.

To paraphrase one of my sister’s friends, we chose to laugh through the pain, rather than to cry from the grief.

And thank god for my sister. Sharing this experience with her has made all of it infinitely more bearable.

Behold. Mitchum Ultimate.

Also known as a nightmare for this paratriathlete.

See that cute little green dial on the bottom?

I cannot turn it.

Try as I might, I just don’t have the grip strength to do it.

So I ask my husband. I Insert tweezers to try to get better leverage to turn the dial. And I struggle.

And I sweat.

Alas. The struggles are real.

#cmtproblems #edsproblems #paratriathlon

It has been hard for me to think about 2016 knowing that I am injured and still not “right”. In addition to managing my ongoing knee problems (a constant theme since January 2013) I now have a torn shoulder tendon to think about. So Josie’s tips for goal setting while injured really resonated with me.

As much as I would like to jump in and announce big lofty plans for my 2016 season I think I need to take a step back and admit that what defines a successful season for me is just managing my way back from and through my injuries. Rehab is the goal. Full stop.

How boring! No sexy races to shout about. No bucket lists to tick off. Just boring scapular strength work, glute strength work, hip stability work, lat engagement work. Dullsville, right?!

Well… I do have some dreams in the back of my mind fuelling the work.

2016 Dream Swimming Plans

I have signed up to do the 5km Defi Monte Cristo swim again in June, hopefully this time without a wetsuit.

In support of this dream goal, I have signed up for swim camp in Croatia, have upped my personal training sessions to twice a week, and can regularly be seen doing scapular push ups on my kitchen counters.

I also signed up for a season pass for the swims and aquathlons at West Reservoir hosted by Capital Tri. The season pass includes weekend swims in the reservoir. Hopefully I can find my bravery to get in the water in May this year to start to build up my cold water stamina.

2016 Dream Paratriathlon Plans

In an ideal world my paratriathlon season would include four of the London League events as well as the Triathlon England national race and the ITU Open Paratriathlon World Championship race in Rotterdam.

But we know that the world of managing chronic conditions like CMT and EDS can be far from ideal, so I am equally putting my efforts into the non-racing side of the sport, laying the foundations for grassroots paratriathlon in the London region. I have some preliminary ideas in the works, and have started to reach out to and build bridges with the London triathlon community. There is huge potential here, and the opportunities energise me (dare I say more than racing?!). Even if my own season winds up derailed, I see so many ways for me to be involved with (and grow) the sport.

The Real Plan: Rehab

And in the meantime, I continue down rehab road. I can definitely tell that my cortisone shot is wearing off as I feel a shoulder ache after hard training. But the ache is different now – not so much pain as sore muscles, and not on the front side of my shoulder, but in my lats and around my scapula – where the ache should be… Finally, after feeling no power for so many months, my lats are firing again! And I was able to last a full swim session with only a few workarounds last week. Plenty of upside!

And my bird dogs are getting pretty good!