A barefooter's quest to find the better way.

Such an interesting article on gluten...

2012-02-16T11:42:00.000-08:00

Trust Sarah Wilson of "I Quit Sugar" fame to break it down for us.

"what's with all of the gluten intolerances?? let me explain..."

Progress: Weight Doesn't Matter

2012-02-15T11:20:00.000-08:00

I started Primal Blueprint knowing I was pretty fit and didn't have a ton of weight to lose, just some muffin top to banish and some toning to do.
I didn't expect to lose 10 lbs in the first 3 weeks. I also didn't expect to plateau for week 4,5 and 6. The needle on my scale hasn't moved much in the past few weeks (2 lbs). I just might toss it out the window- not because I'm angry at it, but because weight doesn't mean all that much!

We've all heard the "muscle weighs more than fat" adage. Technically, muscle has denser mass than fat, but I'm just nitpicking here. As I've browsed the Mark's Daily Apple Forums, I've read it over and over- your body composition is changing. Pay no attention to the flashing numbers! I wanted desperately to believe it. I thought maybe I felt it. I knew my skin was better, my nails were harder, my energy was up, and so many other beautiful little benefits. I pored over "before" pics and 1-month-in pics, mentally grasping to the little lift in my bum, the slightly smaller love handles, and the beginnings of my killer ab muscles peeking out the edges of my mama chub. I could swear my jeans were slightly easier to pull on.
Then last night I went shopping with my husband. Normally, this is a stupid thing to do and only ends in anguish, impatience and a flippant "I don't care!" as I mope to the car. To do this on Valentine's Day seemed idiotic. The shop we went to seemed like even more of a set up for disappointment as it was obviously geared to the younger-than-us crowd. (Obviously younger than us, evident by the fact that the music track sounded like a 12 year old was singing and made us both want to gag!) Alas I was in a good mood and decided to give some jeans a whirl- and maybe a pair of cords too. I grabbed a "realistic" size and a "hopeful"size and asked the squeaky dressing room attendant to let me into a stall. Then I stood in the dressing room marked garishly with "Princess", just GAPING at myself. The 11/12s I had grabbed first didn't fit. They fell off. The "hopeful" 9/10 jeans fit like a glove. My adorable husband made that "oh baby" face when I walked out. :) The cords ended up being those skinny pants that I have loathed for so long on others and secretly wished I could wear without looking idiotic. They had a little stretch to them and fit gorgeously on my thighs and calves, but were a little loose in the waist and butt! I got to ask for a 7/8!! The 7/8 fit beautifully all but being a little snug on my powerhouse crazy thighs to be flattering, but I fit in them!! Without sucking in!! I haven't been in single digits since I was sixteen!
As I woke this morning, still high from an amazing Valentine's night with mine, I started to come down to earth a little. "It has to be the store's sizes," I thought. I stepped on the scale... no change. Then I pulled out my tape measure.
I wish I had taken my measurements on day 1. Alas, the first time I thought to do so, was February 6th. 9 days ago. That's not a lot of time for change. But I told myself I would be objective and gave it a go. I had to measure everything 3 times to believe it.
The only place I didn't lost inches was my bust line!(You read that right ladies!)
Waist is down 1/2 inch, Butt down an inch, hip line down an inch and a half, thighs down an inch! I lost half an inch almost everywhere else and a quarter inch off my forearms. In nine days.
I feel amazing- and now I have the mental place to match it.
And that ladies and gents, is how weight doesn't matter.

It's Not About Low Carb

2012-02-08T08:39:00.000-08:00

I've been Primal for a good month and a week now. It doesn't make me an expert, but I have a lot of thoughts that have been stewing in my research-devouring brain that are getting ripe. Not sure how cohesive this will be, but they need to come out in words somewhere, so LUCKY YOU! Bear with me.

I LOVE the Primal Lifestyle. Love it. One of the reasons I love it is the embracing of unbiased research, the "moderation" attitude, and the return to the simple and real. Unfortunately there are always the extremes- those who grab one aspect and run crazy with it. These people are the reason that others hear "primal" or "paleo" and think- "Those crazy carnivore cavemen are going to die of malnutrition and clogged arteries."

I'd like to clear something up here.

It's not about avoiding carbs, its about avoiding toxins.

Go back and read that again.

Now go read the research. The Primal Blueprint or Wheat Belly, or Good Carbs, Bad Carbs.

What is considered Primal?

*Eating grass-fed, free range meats (and their fat) and eggs
- Fat is the body's preferred fuel-Saturated is better! It's been given a horrible rap by decades of skewed science.
*Eating loads of fresh, organic fruits and veggies.
*Eating wild-caught, omega3-rich fish and seafood.
*Eating moderate or limited amounts of raw, full fat (healthy as you can find) dairy- if that works for your body. Especially if it is fermented (yogurt, kefir).
* Eating avocado, coconut, coconut butter and coconut oil.
* Eating nuts and seeds in moderation- again, if that works for your body.
* AVOIDING toxic things such as most grains and legumes (yes they are toxic-read that research!), Polyunsaturated fatty acids (canola oil, soybean oil, corn oil, vegetable oil, anything with "hydrogenated" in it's name), refined sugars and unnatural sweeteners. Raw honey is a beautiful thing in small amounts, as are Stevia leaves and Maple Syrup
* AVOIDING processed foods
* Moving more- but not over the top! Chronically stressing your body without proper rest periods raises cortisol levels and can lead to adrenal fatigue along with countless other issues. Way more is not better.
* Playing more
* Connecting more
* Sleeping well- letting our bodies chill from screen time before bed is important!
* Getting sunshine! (ps. healthy fat consumption is the body's natural sunscreen)

A Primal diet is by nature a lower carbohydrate diet than the Standard American Diet- where the majority of carbs come from toxic foods (most grains). Does it have to be a super low carb diet? Nope. Sweet potatoes, fruit, veg- all those things contain carbs. If you are looking to lose weight and get to a good maintenance spot, then keeping your carbs low is a good idea. Otherwise, figure out what your body loves according to your activity level and eat that. Keep it real!

80% of our health is dependent solely on how and what we eat. 20% is exercise. Even lazy bums can look pretty good naked (don't pretend vanity isn't even a little bit involved!) and not be skinny fat.

Sensible indulgence foods
Lets get real here. We live and we love to enjoy. I have found myself not even wanting "cheats" that I'd have drooled over 2 months ago. Your body changes when you eat clean and well- balanced. But I need chocolate. I adore chocolate.
There are those foods that are worth the risk to us, there are those that our body can compensate for easily enough, and there are those foods whose health benefits outweigh their not-so-awesome bits.
Dark chocolate (70% or darker) is my sensible indulgence. It's antioxidant benefits are well documented. It has a beautiful stress-relieving effect in sensible amounts. My body has adapted so that a square or two is plenty for me. The serving size on the package is 4 squares- with 2.5 servings in a bar, so I'm well under common limits, and still getting my "fix"!
Mark recommends keeping it at least 80% Primal. That, my friends is easily doable once you've adapted your body to fat burning. I find it easy to stay around 95% Primal.

Random crap I throw in at the end:

*Quinoa is not technically a grain- rinse it well before cooking and it is an awesome super food.
* White rice- While lacking in the nutrient department, is also lacking in the toxin department. If it's worth the calories to you, or you are super active, then it's okay once in a while.
* Grains have nutrients- Of course they do- they are like grass eggs! They also have anti-nutrients. Do the benefits of whole grain outweigh the toxic effects on gut, nervous system and brain? No.
* I dislike those who depend on one source for information. You will notice that pretty much all my links here go to Mark Sisson's website. This is because there has not been one article on that site that has not been well-researched and cited. Citing Mark is like citing the library, or pubmed.
* I know this post in linked to death, but there isn't a single link here that I don't think is important to know.

Give your body some credit...

2012-01-31T08:19:00.000-08:00

Sure, taking in less calories than you burn will probably help you lose weight, but lets give our bodies some credit. We are much more sophisticated than that! Are we losing water weight? Muscle mass? Fat is obviously what we are hoping for and aiming for right? Problem is, your body loves to burn sugar and protein. This means (in a carbohydrate heavy diet, like the Standard American Diet) quick energy, burned very fast, and then what? It starts using up your muscles, that's what. Like I said, a complicated and sophisticated process that we need to understand in order to utilize. It's time to re-program.

Become a fat burner.

I'm a logical person. I love to know the 'whys' and 'hows' of things- especially ones to do with my health and my body. I've read a lot of "research" in the past, most of which, upon further "research" (and usually after I've argued shallowly, yet passionately on it's behalf) is thoroughly debunked. (ahem.. China Study *cough* lipid hypothesis *sneeze*)

I've come to love scientific voices that are objective, thorough, and make sense. Mark Sisson is that. He presents the science, understands the interpretations, and never dodges a tough question. His Primal Blueprint education is brilliant.
It's hard to argue with feeling better, stronger, more comfortable, and more in control than you ever have- and interacting with thousands of others on the same journey. Marks Daily Apple has an awesomely supportive community!

Finished 21 day challenge and beyond!

2012-01-27T11:44:00.000-08:00

We finished up the 21 day challenge on Sunday. Even amidst family gatherings and carbs galore, the hubs and I stayed oh so true. It wasn't very hard.
I'm 10 lbs down and feeling strong!
We took "after" pics to compare to our before shots and I can actually see a difference! In 3 weeks! My collar bones show, my legs and butt have tightened up, my arms are smoothing out some, and my abs are on their way out to say hi! The pictures may or may not get posted as we originally intended them as personal journal keeping, and I don't relish the thought of putting bikini pics of me on my blog. Maybe if/when I get crazy amazing results and look fabulous in a bikini. :)
I keep meaning to post recipes, but there have been so many great ones that I've lost track!
I must say, there is something strangely empowering about making ones own mayonnaise. I added lemon essential oil and dill to go with my tuna and cucumbers on romaine lettuce. DELISH!
I also delved into satisfying my children's requests for primal sandwich bread and muffins. Some tweaks need to be made, but we're getting there- no cheats involved!

It is looking more and more like we are in this for the long haul. "Cheats" aren't fun and don't satisfy. I can taste chemicals in things now, and just a little wheat can cause a lot of gassy, yucky toilet time. I am enjoying the REAL food and energy that I have all the time now. I love not feeling hungry, snacky or crave-y constantly! It is majorly empowering to not revolve around eating!
Ironically, I am now going to post a link to a movie about FOOD. It is excellent. And you can watch it for free through Feb 1st.
Watch FRESH!

Primal Day 14- Results and Decompression

2012-01-15T17:21:00.000-08:00

Two weeks down! This past week only got more dramatic, with more family crisis and people in need. The old me would have been wound up and in constant tears. Instead I found myself calm and collected, able to address problems and do what needed to be done. I've felt beautifully calm and capable despite loads of driving time, extra children in my home (distraught ones at that), lots of extra work and emotions running high all around me. I have no doubt part of that is blessings from above. I also have no doubt that the Primal lifestyle- stabilized blood sugar, plentiful fat- nourishing neural pathways and balancing hormones, has had a large part to do with it as well. Every so often, my emotions decompress and I have a grumpy bout or a good cry, but for the most part I feel amazingly stable and great.

I allowed myself to step on the scale last night for the first time this week, expecting to find that the time of the month and the stressful week would have taken effect. I have done very little purposeful exercise this week- though a lot of kid-lifting, carrying and walking have been done, so I thought that was another strike against me. Not so. I was happily shocked to find the weight still sliding off effortlessly. In two weeks I've lost eight pounds! Whilst drinking shots of heavy cream for snacks and gobbling down bacon and eggs almost every day (and plently of fresh veg with moderate fresh fruit too- let's not forget those). Fat is definitely my friend.

Today my baby brother spoke in church- a report on his LDS mission in Seattle for the past 2 years. (He was amazing!!) Afterwards, there was food to be had. I knew that sweets would abound, as would pasta salads, chips, crackers, and white rolls. I went proactive and brought trays of Primal food- bacon wrapped water chestnuts, mini caprese skewers, cucumbers with herbed cream cheese, and a giant tray of veg. There were of course loads of the other stuff, but there was also shrimp cocktail and meats, cheeses and fruits. We allowed the kids a treat or two, but refrained from all the non-primal fare ourselves. I can only speak for myself, but it was EASY! I wasn't even tempted and I didn't feel deprived in the least. My body did not care for the sugar and grain in the room. I LOVE THAT!! No mindless munching- only mindful enjoyment.

Primal Day 10- Precious Moments and Primal Pancakes

2012-01-11T08:08:00.000-08:00

I'm going to be honest, it hasn't been an easy past few days. So much life has been happening- juicy life, the kind you remember forever- finding the deliciousness within the struggle and the trying times. Those tiny moments you reach to glean and savor so that you aren't crushed by stress, worry... pain. Just so much life- to accept, to adjust to, to truly and fully experience before it's gone.

That said, I'm an emotional eater and I always have been. I stuff people full of my most delicious adoration to show my love, and when I need a crutch myself, I savor... food.
I know it isn't the greatest crutch, but I'm working on it. I have actually been pretty darn good. A little extra dark chocolate, a drizzle of raw honey, one too many apples, but nothing that throws me off track. I've been awful at exercise the past few days. I probably need it more right now. I'll get on that today I think. I need a break from the abundant cortisol!

Okay, enough about me. You want to hear about the food I've made?? Of course you do.
I've taken up this beautiful primal habit of using food up until there's nothing left in it. Animals especially. I've been reading some great stuff over on Mark's Daily Apple (because it's chalk full of great stuff!), and I just can't throw away a carcass anymore! We've been trying to get more meats that aren't chopped, trimmed and scoured down to presentable bits. Our very first official primal day, after a nice long primal shopping trip and with no time to cook before the ravenous tiny new cave people began throwing fits, we brought home a rotisserie chicken. That night I started my first homemade stock. I stuck the carcass- bones, fat, skin and all in a pot with some celery and garlic, covered it in water and boiled it for about 4 hours. It was my first time, and it was delicious, but I could do better. Since then I've made 4 or 5 batches of good chicken and beef stock- fat and mineral rich. And it's as easy as sticking the bones or carcass in the crockpot (sometimes just back in the same crockpot it was cooked in with all the fat and drippings), covering it with water and a touch of apple cider vinegar (to leach out more minerals) and letting it cook for hours. Usually at least 10 hours, sometimes up to 24 hours. It's SO good!! I've taken to freezing some of it in muffin tins and then transferring the 1/3 cup "pucks" of stock into a gallon ziploc to keep in the freezer for future use.

This morning my oldest son asked, "Mom, when is this challenge going to be over? I miss sandwiches and treats." I told him we'd be eating this way for a long time and that treats every once in a while will be okay after our bodies have fully adjusted.
It made me realize I needed to try to make some paleo "breads" and other substitutes now and then to keep things fresh- especially for my kids. So I went upstairs and made some awesome Primal Pancakes and allowed the kids some fresh local raw honey on them.
That brought a lot of smiles!
I've talked about these before, but I feel like little changes have made a big difference!

Primal Pancakes

6 large eggs
6 heaping tablespoons almond butter (about 2.5-3 oz)
3/4 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
1/3 cup coconut milk
2 tsp vanilla (or scrape out a bean)
a dash of sea salt

Place all the ingredients in a blender and blend until smooth. Preheat griddle or pan to about 350˚ melt down a pat of butter and pour your batter on in whatever shapes or circles you deem necessary. Flip once bubble surface in the center of the pancakes and cook for another minute or so. Serve with melted butter and cinnamon, apple butter, sliced pears warmed in melted butter and vanilla or yogurt with a drizzle of raw honey. They also taste pretty great on their own and the texture is awesome!

Primal Day 6 (Catch up!)

2012-01-07T12:19:00.000-08:00

I have some catching up to do. In short, I feel awesome. No more exhausted stupor. My energy levels are pretty consistent and I rarely feel hungry. (And when I do, I eat!)
I'm progressing on my PEM #s! Yay me! I just finished a nicely active morning of lifting heavy things- unloading the Bountiful Baskets co-op truck and helping to divvy up the spoils at top speeds (since the truck was SO late), followed by an amazingly fun session of Suspend and Bend Yoga. The weather suddenly figured out what month is was sometime during the night, so swinging like a bird from the ceiling of a warm room while watching the snow fly outside the window was surreal and magical. I'm pretty sure I laughed out loud. We've upped the fat in our diets so that no one is stopped up anymore and I for one am feeling more consistently happy. I watched the documentary Fat Head the other day, so now I understand why that is! (If you haven't watched it, do- it is on Netflix for those of you that. The second half is particularly educational.
It the past few days, we've eaten like kings... or... cave-kings. Chicken Bacon Brussels Sprout Soup, beef ribs, and our Primal Celebration Feast of Chicken Vegetable Curry over cauliflower "rice", with baked Spiced Vanilla Butter Pears and whipped cream (unsweetened) for dessert. It was so fun to be with Sara and Jason and family, and while their little Hazel didn't love the curry, the other kids gobbled it up and asked for more. Lovely friends and great conversation. Mornings have been abundant with bacon, eggs, Coconut German Pancakes with Spiced Apple Butter, fried eggs over roasted asparagus with bacon, Primal Pancakes, and veggie scrambled eggs.
I don't miss sugar and grains for the most part. I do miss the occasional drizzle of raw honey, which after we finish the challenge will definitely be re-entering our house.
The other day I looked in the mirror and was pretty gobsmacked by how healthy my skin looked! I've noticed the hubs face looking healthier too. I feel strong and healthy and (slowly but steadily)increasingly trimmer. I've lost about 5 pounds in the past week and while I fluctuate often, I feel good about that.
My kids are willingly immersed in the Primal lifestyle- with awesome food, more family togetherness and more outings and play time, who wouldn't be?? I've let them use their own discretion at school regarding treats from classmates and teachers (there are so many! Gah!). And while our oldest (9 1/2) has indulged a few times, our 6 year old has refused almost all treats graciously. I've been so impressed. It has been a gradual change, but my girls are much more reasonable and less tantrum-y this week than last. I have no doubt it's due to our diet changes!
I do wish that our Grand Adventure for today hadn't been waylaid by snow, but it looks like we may just have to go out and play in it!

Primal Day 3

2012-01-04T13:00:00.000-08:00

I. am. exhausted.
Due mostly to the little one that had tummy issues last night and rolled around on my bed alternately screaming and sleeping in odd positions for 3 hours. Not fun.
I'm working on getting her more veg, and less fruit (she eats a lot!). I also gave her some kefir today to see if some probiotic love will help. Not sure if my kids just aren't used to digesting pork, but they all had a bit of tummy aches and constipation this morning. They devoured those boneless pork ribs last night! They were good!
I tackled my Full-Length PEM (Primal Essential Movements) workout for today's exercise challenge. It's a 5 minute aerobic warm up, followed by 2 maximum reps rounds of Pushups, Squats, Pullups and Forearm Abdominal Planks. Kicked. My. Butt. AND after working on negatives for the past few months, I was able to do my first real unassisted pullups in years! Woohoo! I have a problem maxing out in squats. The PEM Mastery requirements say at least 50 is great, but I stopped at 155 my first round... because I was mentally done. My legs didn't tire in the least until the end of the second round. My legs have always been my powerhouse.
My results went like this:

Push Ups Round one: 25 Round two: 30

Squats Round one: 155 Round two: 156

Pull Ups Round one: 6 (assisted with a tiny Round two: 6 (2 unassisted,
push off the floor) 4 assisted)
Plank Round one: 42 seconds Round two: 55 seconds

Need to work on those planks!!

Lunch was a giant salad- Romaine lettuce, spinach, cucumbers, celery, red peppers, tomatoes, carrots, mushrooms and avocado topped with leftover rib meat, olive oil, lemon juice and sea salt. SO YUM!!
I'm thinking something lighter like chicken and veggie coconut soup for dinner. I need a break from heavy meats!

Primal Day 2

2012-01-03T11:12:00.000-08:00

We had a great time adventuring out to find our primal fare and re-stock our pantry and fridge last night. Well, until the kids got too rowdy and yelled everything very excitedly in public until I snapped at them and we headed home. That wasn't fun.

It is awesome to have good food and snacks in the house and it really wasn't much more expensive than a regular shopping trip- even as we stocked up on meat!
I'm reading Mark's Daily Apple and learning so much! At first when we tried to explain what was going to happen to our 4 kids, there was a LOT of moaning and groaning. But as we emphasized what we can have rather than what we can't, they hopped on the wagon really quickly. They went back to school today- which usually results in candy and treats, so we'll see how they do with it. We are allowing them a little more leniency with carbs and calories since they are growing rapidly, but we've set the ground rules! Yesterday we started with an awesome egg, veggie and turkey frittata. We sat down to a rotisserie chicken and loads of steamed broccoli with butter last night. I then proceeded to make my own chicken stock from the carcass and some veg and spices (my first time ever doing so!). We are already seeing an effect on the "eat constantly and then eat some more" habits of my ravenous little ones. It seems like they are snacking less and feeling more satiated. Today we breakfasted on scrambled eggs and smoothies. I've adjusted our smoothies to contain less fruit and much more veg- including spinach, celery, carrot, cucumber, avocado, chia and flax seeds along with the fruit. My boys were pretty excited to have almond butter to dip their celery and bananas in for lunch at school, along with carrots, cheese sticks and turkey.

The littlest little has really gotten into her primal snacks- she loves almond butter!
I've noticed that despite chowing on broccoli last night, she didn't wake with painful gas like she usually does. She slept 'til 7:30 this morning!
I crashed early (for me) last night at 10:30. I had a rough night and didn't feel well- we've had a tummy bug going through our house, so it may have been that, but I think I also overdid it on the pistachios! With some essential oils and taking it easy on breakfast, I'm already feeling much much better. The hubs stayed up late last night (a no no), so we're going to keep our screen curfew tonight for sure!
I'm thinking some country ribs might be din tonight- with a salad and maybe some brussels sprouts or asparagus. Breakfast tomorrow I may do primal pancakes- I've got apples baking down to a sugarless sauce in the crockpot to top them with since we can't do honey or syrup.
I think maybe I'll take the kids for a walk today.

Going Primal

2012-01-02T13:18:00.000-08:00

I have a few years worth of history (on this blog alone) concerning my semi-vegan, vegetarian experiences and learning. So it might seem slightly hypocritical to say I'm going Primal (not to be confused with the similar Paleo diet). I am a firm believer in life seasons and learning. After I had my 3rd darling little, I started my mostly-vegan journey and dropped weight like there was no tomorrow. I did P90X and got down to 155 (which at 5'8" and a rather amazonian build is a fairly big deal for me). It was at that very space in time that I was surprised with my 4th pregnancy. Since my last daughter was born, the same diet has not done the same thing. It isn't what I thrive on anymore. My body chemistry has changed. I crave sugar regularly, I'm tired almost all the time, and I can't lose a pound to save my life. My husband has never stopped having worsening allergy problems, chronic headaches and fatigue no matter what lifestyle/diet we've had, and he's a sugar addict of the monstrous sort! My children are taking after their dad in the sugar addiction field and I won't have it anymore. So we're trying something new. It's a gene-reprogramming transformation program to turn us into "fat-burning beasts"! Mark Sisson's Primal Blueprint 21-day Total Body Transformation Challenge.
I can do anything for 21 days right? No sweat!... Well... there will be some sweat involved, but it won't be over missing bread. :)
I've been loving the Mark's Daily Apple Blog. There are some great explanations of the science behind the Primal/Paleo lifestyle there on the blog itself but I highly recommend Mark's books for the deep down dirty inner workings of it all. The awesome success stories of those that have gone Primal are inspiring. I want in.

So here we go! My pantry, fridge and freezer are purged of all sweeteners, processed foods, grains and legumes. They are all feeling fresh, clean and rather naked. I'm off to find some good organic veg, fruits, free-range meats and eggs, and raw, organic fat-filled dairy. Go Grok!

I'm a scanner!

2011-12-29T10:30:00.000-08:00

“You love everything, right!” Well, yes. “But you get bored and go off on tangents! And you think it’s bad that you keep quitting things and moving on!” Yes, yes, I do! “Don’t! Have some fun with it instead!”

I recently subscribed to Sarah Wilson's blog, mostly because of her "I Quit Sugar" e-book. I immediately found her charming, familiar, adorable and real. So when she posted about things that stuck with her, and linked to an April post about being a scanner, I clicked and dove in. What I read blew my mind and pinned me in a "nail-on-the-head" kind of way that I'm still reeling from. It will take me a while to fully digest the fact that it's okay to just be this way and embrace it.
"Possibly the most reassuring advice I’ve been given"

I'm a scanner! I've always been a scanner. It has bothered me- not that I am one, but that it wasn't an acceptable thing to be! It bothered me from the time I was a child that I had to pick one thing to "be". "I want to be a ballerina, and an actress, and a singer, and an artist, and an author, AND a chef, AND a photographer, AND a veterinarian!" I'd say. Most kids can't name just one. Why have we limited ourselves? It is beyond me! For those who are happy to pick one profession and let that be their definition- if that makes you feel safe and comfy- wonderful and congratulations. I am not you. The thought of that is not a comfy, cozy safe place to me. It is a straight jacket. It is a humdrum hole of dimly lit blandness.

On a slight tangent, that is why I haven't posted on this blog for far too long and most likely have lost most of my readers. The almost-vegan super-chef thing that I rocked for a few years just didn't fit anymore. I had another baby (which I did manage to post about), and became a crazy busy mom of four. I set my camera on the shelf (mostly) and closed my photography business of 4 years. I got really into essential oils and co-wrote/photographed a cookbook (which I also managed to post about- yay me!). I have built, sewn, edited, designed, researched, written, taught, learned, created, lifted, beaten, worked. I want to doula, certify in yoga, go primal, learn to knit and solder, and about a million other things! So this blog is going to be shifting with me. I hope that's okay. There will be recipes and links still, but more personal discovery and discussion as well. I have an aversion to being defined by something I do. I just like to be a me that does (and is good at) lots of things.

This past birthday, I decided what I really wanted was an online Italian Language Course. I was pretty shocked at how many "why would you want to do that?" reactions there were to it when I brought it up excitedly in conversations with friends and family. My first thought was, "Why wouldn't you want to do that??" It's a beautiful language- Latin based and easy to learn, thus a great transition from my minimal Spanish to other languages I'd like to learn as well. It is also, in a way, my personal commitment to make it to Italy someday. And I will!!

I'm finding out that while there are surprisingly (at least to me) many people that don't understand where I'm coming from, there are myriads of people that feel so much like I do. Reading the comments on that blog post made me go, "YES!!" When I read the article things started to fall into place in my mind, including understanding about my husband- my best friend, this man with immense potential that I'm wild about and have wished I could help find his "one passion and career direction" for so many years. I'm pretty sure he is a scanner too. Now we just need to figure out how to embrace it and make it work for us!

Where I've been...

2011-08-31T11:21:00.000-07:00

When other bloggers don't post much, I figure it's one of 2 things: They either lost interest, or they are up to something. For me, it's been the latter. I'm so excited! *does a giddy dance*
I'll try to still my wiggles enough to type this.
Guess what I've been up to??

My friend Natalie and I have written a cookbook!!! SO excited!! Healthy recipes incorporating essential oils for flavor and health benefit, inspired by doTERRA's Slim and Sassy health program and namesake oil blend.

HERE is the new website for the cookbook- you can get your copy there, and HERE is where else you can buy it- Aromatools.com!

Roasted Veggie Lasagna (meatless and gluten-free)

2011-08-01T15:08:00.000-07:00

Oh my. This dish had us fighting over leftovers- even my 9, 6, 3 and 1 year old munchkins were clamoring over my plate for the last bite!
I got an eggplant in my produce basket and a zucchini from my neighbor this week. I do pretty well with either- never at a shortage for zucchini love, but eggplant can be tricky to get kids to eat more than a bite of. It was a rainy evening and this mama needed some comfort food, but as there isn't much pasta to be found in my house these days, and ricotta is almost never in my fridge, so a traditional lasagna was out of the question.
Here is what I came up with. It's time-consuming and a little complicated, but so worth it! You could probably very deliciously substitute extra zucchini if you lack an eggplant. I'm all for wingin' it!

Roasted Veggie Lasagna

Sauce:
1 tbsp olive oil
1/2 white or yellow onion, diced
2 celery stalks, diced
1 large carrot or 5-6 baby carrots, diced or grated
1/2 red pepper, seeded and diced
2-3 large white mushrooms, diced
3-4 large cloves of garlic, minced
1-2 tsp dried basil
1 tsp dried oregano
1 tsp dried parsley
Sea salt and black pepper according to preference
1 4 oz can tomato paste
1 cup water
1 15 oz can tomato sauce
2 tbsp neufchatel cheese (or cream cheese)

Heat oil over medium heat in medium large pot. Add onion, celery, carrots, red pepper, mushrooms and garlic. Saute over medium heat until onions start to soften. Turn heat to low, add herbs and salt and pepper. Cover and let simmer until carrots and celery are soft (about 10-15 minutes). Add tomato paste, water, tomato sauce and cream cheese. Combine well, allow to simmer over low heat for 5-10 minutes. Add salt and pepper according to taste. (You could add a big handful or fresh chopped spinach to this- I meant to and forgot, but it would be delicious.)

While your sauce ingredients soften and simmer, you can get to work on your "noodles".

Noodles:
1 large eggplant
1 large or 2 med/small zucchini
Olive oil cooking spray
Sea salt and pepper

Wash zucchini and eggplant well and slice lengthwise in 1/4 inch slices. I used a hot cast iron pan for this "roasting" part, but a grill or grill pan would work well too.
Spray pan lightly with olive oil and heat to medium high heat. Salt and pepper your eggplant and zucchini and lay them out in a flat layer on the pan and cook until browned on either side and softened (as many as will fit- you'll have to rotate them through as they finish cooking until you get them all done). Set aside on a plate as you get them finished.

Creamy part:
No lasagna is complete without the creamy part. I didn't have ricotta or cottage cheese on hand- you could use these if you do happen to have them.
1-1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 cup grated Parmesan cheese
2 large eggs
2 tsp dried parsley
1/2 tsp sea salt
black pepper
Place all ingredients in a bowl and mix well.

Time to bring it together:
You'll need about 3 cups of shredded low-moisture mozzarella cheese to glue this baby together. Oh- and a little extra Parmesan too.

Preheat oven to *400˚F. Spray a 9x13 casserole dish lightly with cooking spray. Spread a few spoonfuls of sauce on the bottom of the pan and lay out a layer of eggplant. Cover with creamy mixture, then red sauce (be generous), then mozzarella. Follow this up with zucchini- lay it out so that the 'noodles' touch and cover the entire surface. Then add creamy stuff, sauce, cheese and more eggplant. Creamy stuff, sauce, cheese, etc. alternating zucchini and eggplant layers until you run out of components or pan space. be sure to finish the top with sauce and cheese. Sprinkle top generously with some extra Parmesan. Bake at 400˚ for 30-35 minutes- until cheese is browned, lasagna is set and sauce is bubbly. Remove from oven and let cool for 10 minutes before serving.
Meatless yet filling, gluten-free yet comforting.

Love on a plate.

*I started this for about 20 minutes at 375 and then bumped it up to 400. But I think 400 the entire time would work great.

Quick and healthy: uncooked oatmeal

2011-03-01T11:18:00.000-08:00

This blog is a testament that I went through an uber-healthy phase. The dates of the last few entries are a testament that I've been going through a 'quick and easy by necessity' phase. Now is time to combine the two! I discovered a new fav breakfast the other day: Uncooked oatmeal. I don't love the sugar content of instant oatmeal packets, and because I avoid my microwave if I can, cooking oatmeal, though not terribly time consuming, doesn't always fit into our busy school morning. So when I read an article about oatmeal the other day, my first thought was, "How did I go all this time not knowing I didn't have to cook it??" Second thought: I wonder if it's any good? Answer, yes. (It was pretty easy to figure out.)

I've tried it a few ways and I love them all.
Recipe 1:
1 cup uncooked (non instant) oats
about 1/2 cup- 3/4 cup plain yogurt
about 2 tbsp honey
about 1/2 tsp cinnamon

Mix em together and let sit for about a minute. It's that simple!

Recipe 2:

1 cup uncooked (non instant) oats
about 1/2 cup- 3/4 cup unsweetened almond milk
about 2 tbsp honey
about 1/2 tsp cinnamon

Same instructions.

You get the idea- fix it how you like. I've tried rice milk, real maple syrup, chopped up fresh fruit- apples, berries, mango...

It's awesome! Try it!!

Seasons

2010-11-17T09:02:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time (2 years ago) I was rock hard, awesomely ripped, fit. I did P90X, I ran for miles barefoot, I ate an almost pristinely healthy diet. I was not planning on having another baby. But I did. She is marvelous. Our life is fantastic and crazy all at once. And my not-so-ripped abs are very stretched out. Almost 9 months after her birth and I have lost all but 7 or 8 pounds, I'm back in my jeans (slightly tighter perhaps) and I look pretty good. My diet is healthy, but certainly not perfect. I have found other areas of wellness not known to me before, and I have let some lapse. I don't have time to work out heavily for 2 hours a day. I don't sleep enough to fuel that sort of thing (though I certainly wish so)! So what do I do? For a while I did nothing. But I also didn't heal, didn't feel good, didn't function well. Then I decided every day after dropping my boys off at their 2 different schools, I'd put my 2 year old in the stroller, strap the baby in a wrap and walk to a park- one that wasn't so nearby. Sometimes it was 1 mile, sometimes it was 3. Then I got even busier, and the weather got colder, and I gave up on that and did nothing again. (Nothing except for running around like a mad woman trying to keep all my plates in the air and spinning.) Today, this is my fitness regimen. I have an alarm set on my phone for 10:00. It tells me to do 25 twist lunges NOW! And I do. I picked a time when I would generally be home and doing things that could pause for 3 minutes, and I picked an exercise that was fairly total body and that didn't take any special equipment or clothing. I do 50 alternating lunges- so 25 on each side. I twist my torso in the direction of the forward leg, as far as is comfortable, then switch sides. It takes less than 3 minutes. Sometimes that is all I get in the way of purposeful exercise. Sometimes I hit the floor and do 25 pushups afterward. Sometimes I do ab flexes or belly dance moves or squats while I brush my teeth at night! What counts is doing SOMETHING. I don't have to be an athlete right now. I'll have time for that.... when I have time for that. :P- Someday when I'm not covered in tiny ones that want to either "help" me with everything or eat me alive. For now, I am covered in those mommy-eating helpers. I can't do a lot of organized exercise without driving us all mad. And that's okay. It's just a season.

Failure

2010-11-11T13:06:00.001-08:00

Rock me some doTERRA

2010-10-14T12:28:00.000-07:00

I swore i would never fall prey to MLM. Yet here I am a doTERRA Independent Product Consultant. Mostly because I can seriously get behind a solid, amazing product like their Essential Oils. I love them so much! Besides that, their business model is solid and no pressure. It can be as little as a Costco-like membership to buy wholesale myself, or as much as I want it to be- teaching classes, advertising, sending out samples and information. It's hard not to share when a product is this good. Hop on over to my Barefoot doTERRA blog for my doTERRA discoveries, recipes, home remedies and more!

Coconut Curry Veggie Noodle Soup

2010-08-29T08:09:00.000-07:00

Coconut Curry Veggie Noodle Soup

2 tbsp olive oil (or coconut oil)
1/2 sweet onion, diced
3 tbsp minced garlic
1 1/2 tbsp curry powder
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
about 2 tsp cinnamon
1 15 oz can diced tomatoes
1 15 oz can unsweetened coconut milk
3-4 cups chicken stock or vegetable stock (add a little more if you like it really brothy)
about 3-4 cups kirkland signature frozen stir fry vegetable mix
about 1/2 package thai rice noodles
Sea salt and black pepper to taste

Heat olive oil in large pot over medium-low heat. Add onion and garlic and saute until soft. Add curry powder, cayenne and cinnamon. Sitr in and cook for about a minute. Add tomatoes, coconut milk, and stock and bump heat up to medium-high until things start to simmer. Add frozen veggies and stir occasionally until soup is almost to a boil. Add rice noodles (stir them in so that they are covered), remove from heat and cover. Let sit for about 10 minutes, stir. Salt and Pepper to taste and serve! So yummy!
I wish I'd had time to make naan to go with it. I can only imagine the culinary bliss!

Homemade Deo!

2010-08-02T12:12:00.000-07:00

I am loving my Homemade Laundry Detergent. We've used it for over 2 years now. It is saving us money and I love that my laundry smells like nothing (as long as I don't forget about it and leave it in the washing machine overnight- oops!). And so for my next adventure- Homemade deodorant! I'm excited to try it! I am loving the Little House in The Suburbs Blog. Those ladies crack me up!

Simplify

2010-07-22T09:34:00.000-07:00

My life is insane. Raising 4 young children is hard, especially while trying to singlehandedly get a house ready for market and prepare photos and videos for my brothers upcoming wedding. I find myself constantly praying for peace. I ran across this quote the other day and it has been quite helpful in helping me to alleviate some of my own stress.

“Tension is who you think you should be.

Relaxation is who you are.”

I am trying to be who I am and afford others (people and inanimate objects alike) the same privilege. For when I allow things to be what they are, I release myself from tension that, in reality, I created in the first place with my silly illusions of control and the mistaken notion that I know better that anyone else how things should be. We all do it. And when you think about it, it's just ridiculous.

Ahead of me (in the next year) I have at least 2 moves- residency changes. They are a good thing. We'll be getting out of debt and staying that way. We get to co-habitate in the castle on the hill at some point (I'm quite pleased about that). They do, however necessitate some serious simplification. I am forced to look at my belongings and consider very seriously why I keep them, and if I should continue doing so. I am buying simplicity with my belongings... and I am kind of loving it. The less I own, the less I am responsible for. Maintenance, storage, protection of such things, it's all just more worries skittering about in my already crowded head. Clutter is leaving, the DI is getting hefty donations, yard sales are being contributed to. Best of all, my home is becoming more spacious, and though not audibly quieter due to the small people running about, it is in many ways more still- more peaceful. I have less to worry about. I'd say that sounds like a fair arrangement.

My brave cohort has dreams of whisking us away to far off lands in the nearish future. And because yes, we will be out of debt, but no, we will not be wealthy as of yet, that will require further simplification. As in 'what you can fit in a suitcase' kind of simplification. I find myself intrigued and enamoured with the idea of taking only basic needs and starting fresh. (My spellcheck says the 'u' is not welcome in 'enamoured', but I say U is always welcome in my house. I can always go for more of U.) Simplification is becoming a way of life- for survival sake. Our meals are more simple- often a salad and roasted potatoes, a yam and some steamed broccoli, or fish and a veg or two. Because if I don't simplify- we get to bed late, I don't notice my children except to brush them out of the way, and my cohort and I are far too befuddled and exhausted by the end of day to do anything but sit around and feel downtrodden and resentful at every one and everything (including each other). It is truly amazing. I am slowly getting the hang of letting go of my weights... and I feel lighter. Imagine that.

A personal triumph- The Birth Story of Siri Skye

2010-03-04T11:16:00.000-08:00

I've decided to share with you 4 of the most poignant and spiritual hours of my life. I share this because the world, and especially the US is forgetting what real natural birth is and can be. Women are dismayed and discouraged by the thought of what it has become and my story is proof that it is still possible and so amazing. Every woman's birth story is her own- a deep part of her being. Each of my births has had a roller coaster of emotions attached to it and I am grateful for each and what it has taught me. I was determined to make this one beautiful. I read Ina May and Jennifer Block. I found a brilliant Certified Professional Midwife through an amazing friend. I did my research. I made my body the healthiest and best it could be. Here is what happened on Monday March 1st, 2010.

I went to a midwife appointment Monday morning at 9:00- 5 days overdue, in pain and discouraged from a good month of on and off false and prodromal labor. I felt like I'd been waiting forever and my body was just falling apart (all my other 3 were born 1-2 weeks early). After a good long cry to my husband and Heather (my MW) she asked what I wanted to do and I asked if she'd strip my membranes. She agreed that it was probably best to try to get things going and took her time to make sure it would take. On the way home we stopped at a local market to get some castor oil and I began to have irregular contractions. I cooked some scrambled eggs in a small amount of oil (Heather had a feeling it wouldn't take much) and within and hour (around noon) the contractions started coming on more intense and got regular. I sat in the tub for a minute and didn't even bother getting dressed. I put on the sleep bra I planned on giving birth in and wrapped up in a big cushy towel and told Aaron to call his sister to come get the kids. I called my mama and my sister since they each had a 40 minute drive and we started filling the birth pool.

The contractions were getting really intense and within 3 minutes of each other, so I called Heather and told her things were really happening. She asked if she could finish up with an appointment and I told her she could. My last labor had been a drug-free 24 hour long stressful labor in the hospital, so I was sure I had a while. My mama arrived and began assisting Aaron in some loving support and getting things ready. They took turns making preparations and rubbing my back and shoulders while I stood and leaned on the bed. Once everything on our end was ready, I sat on my birth ball with Aaron behind me in his cushy chair doing light touch massage and whispering sweet nothings in my ear. I was able to relax and laugh and enjoy between contractions and let go and let my body open during them. I never knew labor could really be like that. There was pressure and hard work but never what I would call pain. I felt so loved and supported. The birth pool finished filling and I felt the need to use the bathroom before I got in. I peed and had a couple of contractions on the toilet and then moved in to the pool. It was HEAVEN!! I honestly thought for a few minutes that I had relaxed all my contractions away. I leaned forward on the edge of the pool and laid my head on my arms and just floated away through the waves. My sister, Heather and her assistant (her sister) arrived just after I got in. After kisses and greetings and no more than half an hour of relaxing through contractions, the work became harder and took more concentration to take myself away and let my body go. Heather intermittently monitored the baby with the doppler under water and always found her happy and healthy. I found myself taking a suggestion of another natural birthing mama and counted as fast as I could when contractions started to pull me back in. My sister kept reminding me quietly to blow horse lips to help myself open and relax and Heather breathed deeply with me and whispered "Open" through my breaths. I found my thoughts turning to my baby girl and how she was almost here and then I was smiling through my contractions because that was the happiest thought ever! I actually smiled through transition! I very shortly started to feel a little "pushy" and Heather told me to listen to my body. I started nudging a little at a time as I felt the need and softly chanting "Come down baby.". I was shaking with the intensity, smiling at my husband (who had his eyes locked on mine when they were open) and crying quietly all at the same time. It was so intense and hard and amazing. God was in that moment. I pushed with my body's urging on my hands and knees and felt my water break. A minute later what was left of the castor oil effects entered the one side of the pool and Heather wanted me to get out, but it was too late. "She's coming!" I whispered. I put my hand down to support my own perineum and felt her head. I paused to let myself stretch and with one more nudge her head was out. "Head," I said aloud to let them know. One more nudge and I pulled my own baby forward between my legs, out of the water and into my arms. All I could do was look in her face and say, "Yes, yes, yes, yes!" There she was all covered in vernix and perfect as could be! I did it! We did it! 3:37 pm. Around 4 hours of labor- less than 4 minutes of pushing. I could hardly believe it! Heather had everyone help me out of the tub for cleanliness sake and sit on some chux pads while we got Siri breathing. She was so relaxed she kept taking one breath and then falling asleep! It took about 4 minutes, a little suctioning from Heather and some oxygen to get her consistently breathing on her own. Everyone was calm through it except my husband who later said he was pretty freaked out. The rest of us knew she was moving and still attached to me through her cord and placenta so she was still getting oxygen through there. The placenta came out about 5 or 10 minutes later. After that everything is just a cozy, relaxed blur of snuggling and bonding, cleaning up and finishing. My dad arrived about 30 minutes later and sometime after an hour or more Heather convinced me to go shower off with Aaron's help. Heather checked me for tearing (there was none) and bleeding (really minimal). After I was clean, comfy and cozied with my sweet little, Heather did all of the checking, monitoring and weighing (8lbs 7 oz, 21.25 inches long) and Aaron finally cut the cord (the placenta had been put in a chux and gallon ziploc til then and kept near her).

Heather and Janell finished cleaning up while the rest of us took pictures and had family time. It was hours before everything quieted down and everyone left, but I was so happy and energized that I welcomed the company.

It was the birth I always wanted and never truly thought I could have. I am so grateful!!

I had this quote on my wall through my labor and I feel it more strongly than ever:

"There is a secret in our culture. It’s not that birth is painful, it’s that women are strong.” -Laura Stavoe Harm

In Simple Terms

2010-01-18T20:55:00.000-08:00

A quick and excellent lesson on how to find some physical balance...

Try, try again! Cloth Diapering-Take 2

2010-01-15T14:18:00.000-08:00

When I was pregnant with my first daughter (my third child), I became interested in cloth diapering. I researched like crazy and came to ambitious conclusion that I would make my own all-in-one waterproof cloth diapers. I spent the money to order all the special makings. I got to cutting and sewing and only got 6 made. I used them here and there, but ended up with not enough time or energy to finish the rest of them, and was still reliant on disposables. So much for saving us money! I still have stacks of fabric waiting to be used. Now that girl #2 is on the way (less than 5 1/2 weeks left!), I find myself researching again. And coming to a similar conclusion- I want to cloth diaper. I like the environmental side of it. I like the money-saving aspect. I like the health aspect of it. I am however, much more realistic about my time and energy limits in raising 4 children. I have therefore just dropped $350 on a marvelous little bumGenius one-size cloth diapering kit! I am so excited! (And slightly nervous.) It's official- I am cloth diapering this baby. With the one-size diapers, they should last me a full 2 years or more (and if she's anything like my other girl, she'll be potty trained long before that). And if needed I should be able to supplement with the homemade diapers that I have. Wish me luck!!

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth

2010-01-04T11:19:00.000-08:00

As I come into my last months of this (my 4th) pregnancy I have learned that while some things you learn about your body you can count on happening again, but in general, every pregnancy and every childbirth is so different. Years ago my sister recommended that I read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. I was pregnant with my 2nd at the time I think. I thought, "Oh that's great. I've done this natural birth thing once before (in the hospital) and I have a great midwife that I love. I'm good." I dismissed it without another thought. My 1st birth had been a water labor with an amazing nurse who, along side my husband had coddled and protected and supported me through a beautiful experience- marred only by my cold doctor breezing in last second to give me an unwanted, unneeded episiotomy and leave me to a painful and shocking recovery period. My 2nd birth ended up being a pitocin inducement in the hospital (after 2 weeks of exhausting and unprogressing early labor), and while I didn't have an epidural, my birth experience was not exactly what I wanted it to be. 3 years later and pregnant with my 3rd child, I studied Hypnobirthing hoping I could improve on what I'd experienced the last time. I still had my same CNM (whom I loved) and was planning on birthing in the same hospital. My personal awareness and philosophies about birth were slowly changing and my situation (without me fully realizing it) was not ideal for my wants and needs. I started labor naturally 2 weeks early (just like my first). I labored at home for a good 9 hours before heading to the hospital. I wasn't sent home, but was at the mercy of the Dr. on call and was not admitted until I could "prove" that this labor would progress (which ended up not happening until 5 the next morning- 8 hours later). I spent that time in horrible fear of being sent home, resentment that my terribly sick husband was sleeping in the corner and not supporting me every second, up in arms that every nurse that came through was cold, indifferent and had not read my birth plan and trying amid the loneliness to practice my hypnobirthing exercises while desperately willing my contractions to keep going. I finally demanded to see my midwife and at the sight of someone trusted and supportive labor began to progress in earnest. I had done everything on my own to try to have the birth I wanted, and despite my best efforts I ended up with a miserable, unfulfilling 18 hours, followed by 6 hours of the birth I'd wanted in the first place (except it included a hep-lock that equaled much pain for no reason at all thanks to that awful doctor on call). I had my sweet daughter- drug-free and with minimal pushing (just like my others), but I vowed that if there was a next time, it would be what I wanted of it. I had learned that no- I can't control exactly what happenes with my body, but I can give myself the environment, the knowledge, the support and the best chance of getting what I want.
When I was surprised with the news of my 4th pregnancy, I immediately called my sweet friend who had gushed about her amazing home birth and got the information of her midwife. I began to plan my birth- to give myself the chance at the birth I wanted so badly. I took my stresser (the hospital) out of the equation. I began to hungrily read all I could find about home water birth. I found I adored my new midwife Heather and her philosphies. I trust her immensely. I feel bold, respected, trusted and cared for. In my ravenous inhalation of information, I came across Ina May's Guide to Childbirth once again. As I read, I found myself exclaiming out loud, "Yes! Why didn't I know that before?!" I was touting the book to others before I could even finish it. So much vital information- statistics, instructions, suggestions, answers, knowledge, science, spirit! I devoured it. I cannot recommend it highly enough. I feel that my feeling of trust and boldness are now accompanied by knowledge and pure confidence. I recommend it not only to the pregnant woman in preparation, but to the woman who's birth was good but who wanted more, the man who wants to support fully, the mother who wants more for her daughters, the friend who would act as doula, the person who just needs to understand. If you have skeptical questions or doubts and you want numbers and statistics on safety and the sanity of natural birth/ home birth- this book is for you. If you are natural minded and wanting affirmation and reassurance and education- this book is for you as well! If you are somewhere in between and trying to make up your mind for the most fulfilling experience for yourself- READ IT!
I could go on forever. I could analyze my own past births and lay out every specific that I felt would have improved with the knowledge Ina May provided. I will spare the everyday blog reader those details, but I beg of you for your own sakes- arm yourselves with the education to give yourself the birth experience you deserve.