Pssst…just in case you didn’t know, Valentine’s Day less than two weeks away! Isn’t that exciting? I’m such a sucker for Valentine’s Day. It’s all about love! And I love love!

Anyway, I’ve created a pretty little fill-in-the-blank love letter for anyone who’s looking for a bit of inspiration. Just print it, fill it out, and present it to your sweetheart with a big kiss!

Romantic prompts include:

You make me swoon when…

I adore the way you…

Thank you for…

I think it should make for an fun, easy project for anyone who is looking to express their affection but is short on time!

As always, to snag this document simply subscribe to my RSS feed in a reader (such as Google Reader or Bloglines). The download is available on the bottom of each post in the feed (see screenshot below).

Happy lovin’, loves!

1.

Welcome, Conversion Diary readers! I’m delighted that you’re here! If this is your first time visiting, please leave a comment. I’d love to “meet” you!

2.

I cannot believe that there is less than a month left until the release of my book! It is going to be a very long month. I am so not good at waiting! Luckily, I’ll be able to share little excerpts and other fun details with you all starting very soon!

3.

Speaking of the book, thank you all very much for the overwhelmingly positive response. I’ve been particularly touched to hear that conference and retreat leaders have been interested in incorporating it into their events. With all the different perspectives from all these fabulous ladies, I have to say I agree that it would make a perfect attendee gift or discussion piece. In fact, each chapter wraps up with a Q & A section to facilitate this. Bulk orders are available, so don’t hesitate to contact me if you’re interested!

4.

March is going to be a seriously awesome month. In addition to the release of my book, the Behold Conference will be taking place! Will you be there? Say yes! I’m dying to meet as many of you as I possibly can!

5.

Sarah at Amongst Lovely Things (one of my very favorite blogs) has just launched a brilliant new weekly link-up with her friend, Pam. It’s called Pinning it Down and its goal is to encourage those of us who’ve become mildly obsessed with Pinterest to actually attempt some of the great project ideas we pin. Isn’t that fantastic?

6.

“Consumers should treasure garments like true pieces of craftsmanship, rather than making flippant decisions to buy and quickly dispose of them, like themed paper napkins for a party. The more we learn to value and appreciate garments and their quality, the more we will enjoy our clothes and maintain a sense of enjoyment in the long haul of the garment’s life. Though we may spend more money on the original purchase, we will save money in the end, by having a satisfactory wardrobe and shopping less often. With clothing, it’s time to mature and think about long-term relationships, not one-night stands.”

I couldn’t agree more. Do check out the entire post here. It’s a pretty thought-provoking piece for those of us who fancy fashion.

7.

I know the Gosling meme phenomenon is not a new one, but Homeschool Ryan Gosling and Homebirth Ryan Gosling? Solid gold. Kudos to the creators. I am dying over here.

My poor, poor husband went off and married a woman who couldn’t cook.

I mean, I really couldn’t cook.

I was bound and determined to learn, though, so once in a while I’d set out to create elaborate meals in an attempt to master the art of cooking. I’d pull out all the stops–creative appetizers, scrumptious main courses, perfectly complimentary side dishes, decadent desserts, softly glowing candles, fine china, cute outfits (of course)…you get the idea. One day while Dan was at work I decided to prepare a romantic feast as a surprise for him. I slaved away all day and then eagerly settled in to await his arrival home.

Only, he didn’t come straight home from work. Not by a long shot.

The food got cold and I quickly became hot — and not in that desirable (pun intended) newlywed way, either, if you catch my drift.

Eventually my husband made it home but by that time I was furious. He was apologetic but kind of vague regarding the details of where he’d been which irritated me to no end. In short, there was no romantic feast that night. Which is sad! Romantic feasts are lovely! It wouldn’t have been so hard to re-light the candles, re-heat the food, and savor the romance but I chose to remain irritated and stomped off in an attempt to make some silly point.

Later that week I noticed that his jacket was missing. Where was it? Well, girls, he wouldn’t say. I pressed him–oh yes, I did–but he still wouldn’t say. At this point he was left facing a grave decision: does he keep the whereabouts of the mysterious disappearing jacket a secret and endure the wrath of his (not-so) mild-mannered young wife? Or does he confess and reveal his deep and (not-so) dark secret?

(Oh, the suspense!)

He wisely chose the latter. He’s going to kill me for sharing this, but here’s what had happened: he’d stopped on his way home to help a homeless man. He gave him food and the jacket off his back. That’s why he’d been delayed. And that’s where the jacket had gone. The reason he hadn’t wanted to share all this with me is because he likes to humbly carry out these little acts of mercy quietly.

I love that man.

I’d assumed it was something selfish my husband had done that had caused him to be late for dinner. In other words, I assumed the worst. And as a result, I ruined the evening. (Keep in mind this was before he had a cellphone so he really couldn’t have called. Nor had he specifically said that he’d be coming directly home from work. I’d just figured he would.) I could have chosen to assume the best. I couldn’t have recognized that I have an amazing husband who would never have purposefully ruined my dinner. But I didn’t.

That was not the first time I’d assigned uncharitable motives to my husband’s actions, nor would it be the last. I’m a bit of a slow learner but eventually it dawned on me that my failure to assume positive intent was hugely unfair and was damaging our relationship. So I decided to change my foolish ways. (Or try to, anyway.)

These days I can more clearly see my husband for the remarkable man he is. That doesn’t mean that he’s perfect (or that I pretend that he’s perfect); it just means that I am committed to seeing the best in him. I am committed to viewing him and his actions through a lens of trust rather than suspicion. And it does take commitment. It’s not always an easy thing to do when I am disappointed by the way something has turned out but it’s a habit I’ve worked hard to form and continue to work hard to reinforce. Also? It’s only fair. No one deserves to have their motives questioned without provocation. Certainly not my husband–an faithful husband and father who has only ever wanted the best for his family.

Imagine how much stronger marriages would be if we all decided to assume positive intent. Imagine how much happier we would all be if we chose to see the best in our spouses. Have you ever encountered a couple whose love for one another is practically palpable? I don’t think the large majority of them have less struggles or are more virtuous than the rest of us. I believe that they’ve simply disciplined themselves to believe in the goodness in one another, forgive the weakness, and be grateful for the gift of their love.

Love!

“Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the Art of Marriage, the little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say ‘I love you’ at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon; it should continue through all the years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have the wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding rooms for things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.”

(HT: Catholic Marie on Pinterest)

I was chatting with some friends over on Twitter about clothing dilemmas and it occurred to me that I hadn’t yet shared my #1 fashion fix with you all! How could this be?

How could I not have mentioned Hollywood Fashion Tape before now? Shame on me. Because oh my word, girls. This stuff is awesome. Seriously. I consider it a must-have for every woman.

Here are a few of the cool things it can do:

• Hide bra straps.
• Secure revealing necklines.
• (Temporarily) fix hems.
• And close button-up blouse gaps!

Plus, it’s super inexpensive (I bought mine more than a year ago and I still have a ton left), hypo-allergenic, and leaves no residue on clothing. Just remove backing, press firmly to clean skin or fabric, remove remaining backing, apply item to be secured, and voilà! That’s all there is to it!

I really can’t adequately explain what a lifesaver this stuff is.

Love!

Just a quick note: for those of you who haven’t yet snagged my Cultivating a Heart for Your Husband free e-Booklet, I’ve added it to my feed. Just subscribe in a reader and download away!

Kisses!

There’s been a lot of talk lately about thriving. Can mothers of little ones thrive? Should we encourage them to strive to thrive or should we dose them with a bit of reality to protect them from burn-out and discouragement? And what does it mean to thrive anyway?

It all started with this excellent article by Jennifer Fulwiler in which she expresses her concern that by telling women that they cannot expect to achieve great things (outside of child-rearing) while in the midst of young motherhood, we are discouraging women from embracing this rewarding lifestyle. Arwen Mosher responded with this poignant piece about the ways in which Jen’s article troubled and challenged her. You should read both.

Here’s my take:

My life is a story of seasons; of traveling in and out of times of want and of plenty. Having been pregnant five times over the last decade it could be argued that–physically-speaking–the emphasis has been on want. Five pregnancies, five births, five early postpartum periods. Five seasons of self-denial and of self-preservation.

And it’s been glorious in its own mysterious way. Not just because of the sweet babies but because through these seasons of want my soul has been purified in ways I never could have imagined. I’ve practiced intense self-sacrifice as I’ve poured myself out–body and soul–for my little ones and I’m better for it. Despite what our society might assert, that is the definition of thriving.

It’s not just something that happened to me. God pushed, I resisted, he pushed some more, and I learned–little by little and very slowly–how to surrender. To thrive we absolutely must surrender and surrendering is hard–so very, very hard.

We must be gentle with–and merciful towards–ourselves. During these consuming periods of growth I’ve learned to go easy on myself. Showers are more rare than I’d care to admit and yoga pants more common. The pursuit of endeavors outside of my little home doesn’t even cross my mind. This is not a failure on my part but a victory over selfishness. After all, this self-forgetfulness is a dying to self; this is the strength of a mother; and this is to be applauded.

I realized recently, though–as my little girl celebrated her first birthday–that my dying to self was starting to look an awful lot like indulging myself. What had once been the virtue of self-denial was becoming disfigured and starting to manifest itself as sloth.

It wasn’t laziness that caused me to stumble but fear. Fear that if I pushed myself a little harder, expected a little more, that I would crash and burn. It’s a delicate balance we mothers seek between protecting ourselves from burn-out and pushing ourselves out of our comfort zone to ensure that we are achieving all that God is asking of us. It requires vigilance, careful discernment, and a whole lot of trust.

It requires us to trust that if we do push too hard that God will be there to break our fall and gently guide us back to balance.

And trust we must–for though it’s true that a rejection of the dying to self that periods of want require would be a failure to thrive, so, too, would be a refusal to fully embrace seasons of plenty. Just as the Church calls us both to seasons of feasting and fasting, not all the days of a mother’s life are meant to be spent in survival mode.

Sometimes I get so immersed in surrendering to these seasons of want that I fail to notice that they have come and gone. The baby sleeps through the night, my energy levels increase, and I’m still standing there in my dirty pajamas. Before I know it we’ve been entrusted with another precious soul and I’m left wondering why I didn’t take advantage of the reprieve.

In all but the most extraordinary of circumstances, most women are given a little break between the more intense moments of motherhood (such as pregnancy, birth, and the early postpartum period). We are given an opportunity to rebuild the temples of the Holy Spirits that were broken down in delivering new life so that they can be built up again to emerge–body and soul–more resplendent than ever.

What does thriving look like during seasons of plenty? It will look different, of course, for each woman, but I found Jen’s suggestions to be a great source of inspiration. The following are on my short list:

• Pursue physical fitness.
•  Have fun with your appearance.
•  Enjoy your favorite hobbies.
•  Nurture your marriage.
•  Feather your nest.
•  Enrich your prayer life.

While caring for our families should always be our priority, God cares, too, about our needs and our passions. It took me almost ten years to learn that it is not a virtue to cast them off out of some misguided sense of martyrdom. Sometimes, it’s true, he says, “No, now is not the time.” But sometimes he says, “Yes, my daughter. Rest, relax, and seek rejuvenation.” Strange how it can be harder for me to hear that prompting than the one that calls me to self-sacrifice.

I’m a slow learner but this I now know: there is never a time, never a situation, where God shuts out the potential for you to thrive. Thriving can’t be limited to some narrow definition. We are not thriving if we neglect the physical in favor of the spiritual. Neither are we thriving if we do the opposite. A mother’s life can be full of all sorts of satisfying experiences: the joy of embracing the cross of self-denial, the blessing of cultivating passions, and the gift of pursuing physical fitness, loveliness and pleasure. The key is to surrender to the season; to surrender to whatever it is that God is asking of you at any particular moment. To push yourself outside of your comfort zone, to listen to the ever changing call of God, and to thrive wherever it is that you are planted.

I am honored to be guest posting today over at the lovely blog of my dear friend, Elizabeth Foss. Elizabeth has been a blessing to me from my earliest days of motherhood. Her tender guidance and gentle wisdom were a balm to my soul during a time of intense transition. I don’t know if I’ve ever properly thanked her for that so, thank you, Elizabeth. And happy birthday!

Over the past couple of years I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting upon and writing about the importance of self-care. Far too often I see good, faithful women neglecting themselves for fear of vanity or self-indulgence–a fear that is understandable given the state of our culture. It seemed to me that what had been lost was an appreciation for the value of putting our best foot forward for the sake of effective Christian witness, for nurturing the sexual-love aspect of our marriages, and for showing our children how much we value our vocation.

For a long time something nagged at me, though. It’s not that I disagreed with what I was advocating for, but a quiet voice suggested that maybe I’d missed something. Maybe the list was not complete.

And, indeed, I had. And it wasn’t.

I’d considered husbands and children and the world at large but I’d forgotten about you. And I’d forgotten about me…

You can read the rest here!

Starting Bloom Personal Shopping was easily one of the highlights of 2011 for me. Style consulting has always been a passion of mine and it was such a pleasure to translate that into a small business this past year. Over and over again I have seen how much joy a woman can derive from having a wardrobe full of clothes that she can delight in, that give her confidence, and that highlight her loveliness and make her feel beautiful. It’s truly an honor to play a part in helping women achieve this goal.

Ask any personal shopper, though, and she will tell you that what goes on behind the scenes is incredibly time-consuming and labor intensive. Because of this, my Personal Shopping packages are not inexpensive. Add to that my limited availability and I, sadly, don’t get to work with all of the women with whom I might otherwise have the opportunity to collaborate.

Because of this, I’ve decided to create a series of free e-Booklets that will help you to makeover your wardrobe on your own. These e-Booklets obviously won’t be as personalized as my packages are–and you’ll have to do your own shopping, of course–but hopefully they will make the process run more smoothly and be more enjoyable.

The first e-Booklet I’ve created, Dressing with Intention, tackles the topic of intentionality. It will guide through five simple steps (spread out over five days) that will help you to create a plan of attack for making over your wardrobe. As with everything in life, planning is half the battle!

To snag this first e-Booklet in the series, just subscribe to my RSS feed in a reader (such as Google Reader or Bloglines). The download is available on the bottom of each post in the feed (see screenshot below).

I hope this helps! Please don’t hesitate to ask follow-up questions in the combox!

Love!

P.S. If you find this e-Booklet helpful, I would love it if you’d share this post on Twitter, Facebook, and/or your blog, etc. Thank you!