Rihanna in early 2009 seemed to have it all; a hit record, money, love, acclaim. Everyone was vibing to her hypnotic single “Umbrella” and she was all set to receive awards and accolades from all over the industry. Then, on February 8th, 2009, two of the most up and coming stars of the R&B/Hip-Hop world clashed violently on the way back from a party. Soon, Rihanna’s bruised and battered face was all over the internet. Speculation ran rampant: what caused this young, golden couple to come to such a confrontation? Many rumors where out there, from an argument over cheating to finding out that one of the lover’s had given the other an STD but no one knew for sure what happened, except for the two people involved.

That’s domestic violence. No one outside can really judge or speculate accurately what goes on in an abusive relationship. Why do they stay? Why does he do it? Can they change? Is love enough?

I’ve been a victim. I had a boyfriend named Al (real name) that was very loving, at first. We had a whirlwind romance where within a week he was proposing marriage. He was jealous and possessive. Then he got physical. He’d hit me, beat me, kick me and curse me. He’d apologize. ‘Look what you made me do?’ he’d say. He’d cry with me. He’d acknowledge that he had a temper. ‘I get so angry because I love you so much’ as if strong emotions, good or bad was a good thing.

I don’t know why I bought into it. Maybe it was because I had very few relationships before and had no real frame of reference for what a relationship should be like. All the drama of a “Dynasty” episode? Maybe I wanted to believe his apologies and start fresh; even though we had only just started seeing each other. Low self esteem? Desperation? Loneliness? Naiveté? Sexual desire?

The last straw was when he beat me even though I was carrying his child. The look in his eyes told me that he was enjoyed seeing me in pain. He got a thrill from it. I had to do what any woman has to do in that situation; decide if I wanted to be in that relationship.

Al was never prosecuted for his crimes against me. I never called the police. My neighbors who heard the loud fights and eerie quiet afterward never called. My friends who saw the bruises never spoke about it.

Whether Al had changed his behavior is a mystery. I never saw him again after he left (I would like to say I threw him out, but I didn’t). He could have changed, got help. I felt bad for a long time afterwards that I didn’t get rid of him sooner, or saw the signs. I blamed myself for the beatings he gave me. Rihanna told Diane Sawyer this morning on “Good Morning America” that she went back “eight or nine times” and she was “blinded by love”. I know how that feels. I’m glad she saw the light. Some never do and remain in a dark place.

Then whose fault is it? The abuser or the person who stays? There has been a lot of blaming the victim and coddling of the abuser. The victim feels guilt, once they have the strength to leave, for not leaving sooner. If you leave, it’s a victory. You are only defeated if you stay knowing you should get out.

Stop the violence.

Every girl dreams of the big white wedding. And almost every single woman will work her way to walking down the aisle in the grandest fashion. But let’s get real. Times are tough, budgets are tight and somehow, planning your wedding will involve cutting corners.

It’s not quite a bad thing, though. Quaint, intimate, small weddings are equally big in memories as their 200-guest list counterparts. Here’s why:

Smaller budget, smaller costs – A smaller guest list means fewer mouths to feed and renting a more cozy and affordable venue. This also means a smaller bill at the open bar. Smaller weddings also call for a smaller entourage, so this means fewer bridesmaids to dress up.

Lower chance of debt – There’s a lot of wedding horror stories going around about how the couple’s first financial task was to deal with the credit card bill and debts with family and friends incurred during the wedding planning. Small weddings help you keep the expenses down and lessen the opportunity for debt. That is, unless you really have no money to start with.

Fewer unwanted gifts – Not all gifts can be exchanged or returned. Not everyone will avail of the registry service. Your second aunt Doris will lovingly knit you guys matching sweaters. That obscure cousin from your uncle’s second marriage will gladly give you that tacky photo frame he got from his own wedding.

More time to meet and greet your guests – The conga line may be shorter, but there’s more time to actually sit down, chat for a couple of minutes and memorize the names of your guests (especially your in-laws). There’s an even greater chance of snooping out the gatecrashers.

More time to focus on you as a couple – Even with a coordinator, big weddings can overwhelm you with the planning for that One Big Day. But the greater concern to focus on is the lifetime that happens after that. Small weddings lend to simpler planning strategies. [See HERE for the 5 things you need for a successful wedding] What you end up with is more time to prepare your mind and heart for your future spouse.

Many real life couples opt for smaller weddings simply because there’s no point to spending all that money in one night. There are lots of little ways to bring down the cost of The Big Day. See this article for a list of ideas.

You are giving your baby a truly precious gift: an excellent genetic makeup.

As loving and responsible parents, we want the best for our children, even if it requires that we give up something–make a sacrifice. In giving up your own genetics, you give your baby something better: a greatly decreased risk of chromosomal disorders such as Downs syndrome. And donated eggs provide other genetic advantages, too: the young women accepted as donors by donor egg agencies and IVF clinics have excellent genetic histories, better than that of the average person. Most likely, better than your own.

Your baby will be every bit as unique as if he or she were your genetic child.

Your little one won’t be a “designer baby” or a “test-tube baby”; he or she will be created out of the love between you and your husband or partner, regardless of genetics. And speaking of genetics, they’re notoriously unpredictable anyway. You probably know people who are very unlike one or both of their parents or look very different despite a genetic connection. Perhaps you know an artist whose parents can’t even draw stick figures, a shy friend with social-butterfly kids, a neighbor with a great tan whose daughter has to pile on the sunscreen. Regardless of whether your baby has a genetic connection with you or not, he or she will have a very special and individual set of characteristics that will yield plenty of surprises and joys as the years go on.

You’ll get excited over the wonderful young women available as egg donors.

Most women do not start looking at donor profiles until they are actually ready to start the preliminaries for an IVF procedure. If you are facing the egg donation option but feel sadness about it, try jumping the gun and learning about egg donors currently available. Look at donor profiles available at egg donor agencies that post profiles online (or online with a free user account), even if you don’t plan to use a particular agency or any agency at all. You’ll learn what types of information you are typically given about an egg donor and can start to decide what characteristics are the most important to you.   Most likely, you will start warming to the choice when you see the wide selection of healthy, intelligent, and beautiful donors that you can choose from.

You will feel just as strong a connection with your child as you would if he or she had developed from your own egg.

Some people assume there’s some kind of metaphysical connection between biological family members that doesn’t occur between unrelated people. But think about your own parents, and your other blood relatives. Even if you have a good relationship with them, you are aware that they are individuals who are separate from you, with some things in common but many differences. You probably feel a stronger connection to your husband or partner, or other people who are not biologically related to you.

In addition, as humans, we are “programmed” to bond with babies and children that need us, even if they are not biologically related to us. This probably comes from our prehistoric days in which postpartum death was common and many young infants were left motherless. To ensure that our species kept its numbers up, we developed the instinct to raise these orphaned babies as if they were our own. And to feel just as if they were our own as well.

You are choosing a winning strategy.

Many women, when trying to conceive, find company and support on online infertility forums. If you are currently on a forum for women trying to conceive after age 40, you surely value the camaraderie and enjoy celebrating other members’ successes. But the number of disappointments can be discouraging. Take a look, instead, at forums for women undergoing donor egg IVF treatment. These forums are happy places with very high success rates. So often, members are busy high-fiving someone’s positive home pregnancy test, steadily doubling HcG levels, or an ultrasound that shows a healthy heartbeat.

And finally…

When plans change, your feelings need time to catch up. Don’t expect yourself to absorb it all right away and to be ready to jump forward immediately. But remember that numerous women have experienced just what you’re going through now. And many of those women are now mothers through egg donation and couldn’t be happier. One of those moms, who started out very unsure if she could accept the donor egg option, said after the birth of her son, “if someone could wave a magic wand and give me my own healthy eggs, you know what I’d say? ‘You keep those silly things; I just want a baby as wonderful as my little Andrew!’”

Put Away the Tweezers

When you’ve overplucked your eyebrows, it’s easy to add insult to injury by plucking more hair in a desperate attempt to make things better. Put the tweezers away unless your eyebrows are grossly uneven. Chances are you’ll do ever more damage if you continue plucking. Instead use an eyelash brush to comb the remaining hairs into place so you can better assess the damage.

After Overplucking Eyebrows, Fill in the Damage

The best way to fix overplucked eyebrows is to use an eyeliner pencil in a color that’s one shade lighter than your natural eyebrows. Use light, feathery strokes to apply it to the areas that have been overplucked. Resist the urge to use a heavy hand. You can always go back and fill in more color later if you’re not satisfied with the initial application. Choosing a color that’s too dark or applying it with heavy strokes will create a harsh look that’s too unnatural.

Once you’ve filled in both eyebrows, move to a window and inspect your work under natural light. Can you see where you’ve applied the color? If it doesn’t look natural, you’ll need to start over again. If you notice gaps, use an eyeshadow brush to dab brow powder in the same shade as your liner onto the areas that need it. Now that you have the damage covered, be patient. It takes time to grow back overplucked eyebrows.

How to Prevent Future Problems

Most people need some guidance when shaping their eyebrows to reduce the risk of overplucking. It may be worth the money to let a professional pluck and establish a natural looking brow line you can maintain at home. It’s less challenging when you only have to remove the re-growth.

If you don’t want to spend the money on a professional, consider using an eyebrow stencil. If you haven’t discovered the convenience of eyebrow stencils, you’re in for a surprise. They provide an easy to use blueprint for shaping eyebrows evenly. You can even get eyebrow stencils in the shape of your favorite celebrity eyebrows. If you’re in a hurry, there are sites where you can print out online eyebrow stencils on your printer and use them right away.

The Take-Home Message

Eyebrows take time to grow back, so it’s best to use a stencil or let a professional give you guidance if you’re unsure of the shape you want. Thick, full eyebrows look stunning anyway, so lighten up on the tweezers.

Or take the case of that same girl being robbed at gunpoint in the streets of a major city. What would she rather have, a diamond or a handgun? Well, if she chooses the diamond as her ‘best friend’ she’ll lose that best friend in a New York minute. But with a handgun she gets to keep her life and her sanity, and know that she thwarted a thug who would have otherwise been trying to steal her so-called best friend or any other valuable that she had on her person. The priorities of some people just amaze me sometimes.

I’ve even heard the newest best friend of a girl’s is chocolate. Chocolate. Imagine that. That’s worse yet. Ever try to curl up to a bar of dark chocolate Godiva’s? How long could you actually curl up to it before it starts melting. Even a handful of ‘melt in your mouth, not in your hands’ M&Ms would be a messy disaster if cuddled with for over fifteen minutes in your hand. Again, a girl’s in the jungle, what would she rather have as a friend, a Hershey’s bar or anything else that would save her life? Even if she had the chocolate bar, the lion is going to enjoy that AND her. So, she loses her best friend Hershey and an arm or two. It’s not my idea of a fair fight necessarily, but no one ever informs the lions that they needed to be fair. A person just might line my wife’s pockets trying. And this all says nothing about a person who eats her best friend – chocolate – every chance she gets. What kind of best friend is THAT?

Women, you’ve got to choose better ‘best friends.’

Now before I’m accused of being overly chauvinistic I’ll talk about a man’s best friend, his dog. Has anyone ever – ever – asked a dog who HIS best friend is? Do you honestly think it’ll be his master, the man? Again, a dozen better friends come to mind. A thick steakbone perhaps. The well-groomed white poodle on the other side of the picket fence maybe. But, a man? I’ve even heard a relative say that his dog is his best friend because he talks with the family. Talks…with…the…family. No doubt they have discussions about the state of world affairs, religion, and current issues related to investing in the stock market. He says the dog knows what he wants and will come running. Essentially, he barks (?talks?) on cue, the dog, that is. The dog may communicate perhaps, but talk? I don’t think so. I was ridiculed for suggesting otherwise. A dog has got to choose better friends if he wants to survive in this world. A man – even one who firmly believes his dog actually talks to him – would be wise to do the same.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s great that he’s close to his family.  But there’s a family bond and there’s an unhealthy clinging.  If he still lives at home (and is of a reasonable age to be living on his own), if he visits his mom more than twice a week, or if he talks to his mother on the phone longer than he talks to you, be worried. You will never live up to his standards.  His mother raised him, took care of him when he was sick with homemade soup and a kiss on the forehead, was there for him throughout his entire life.  He will never give up that unhealthy attachment to his mom, and you shouldn’t have to try to convince him he should.  Say things get serious between you two, despite his mother’s interference: Forget about moving away from his mother.  In fact, he may invite her to live with you when she gets older and less independent.  She will be an active participant in all decisions made between you and him, whether she’s around or not.  And if there is an argument, he will always side with his mother.  Your relationship will never be you and your boyfriend.  It will be you, your boyfriend, and his mom.

The Lazy Guy

This guy has never cleaned anything in his life.  Nor has he cooked, picked up his dirty socks, or held a job for more than two weeks.  Chances are, he was a mama’s boy in a former life and had all of these things done for him, which he now expects his new girlfriend to do.  If your duties resemble those of a mother’s instead of a girlfriend’s, you know you’re in trouble.  Why would this type of man be appealing, you ask?  Because it’s a female instinct to nurture and care for others.  We see an injured bird and we take it home, feed it every two hours, keep it warm, talk to it.  The lazy guy is our injured bird.  But worse.  This guy WILL NEVER do anything for himself as long as he has someone else who’s capable of doing it for him.  This is why you need to bail on this loser.  For his sake as well as your own.  Think of it as letting the injured bird, now healed and back in good health, fly back into nature where it must again fend for itself.

The Workaholic

This man is successful, classy, well-dressed and proper.  He only buys the finest, has a fabulous house in an exclusive neighborhood, and drives a Benz.  He’s well-educated, polite, and charming, but be wary.  If he’s wearing a Bluetooth device 24/7, only discusses business, and has to pencil you in for dates, he won’t make you happy.  His work will always come first.  If you have dreams of traveling, moving to another state, or pursuing any dream of your own, you will be sorely disappointed if you expect him to support you.  Nothing, not even you, is more important than his work.

The Womanizer

This man is gorgeous, popular, fun, and a great guy to hang out with.  He’s flirty, a fantastic lover, and excellent eye-candy.  Chances are, you met this guy at a party of a mutual friend.  He approaches you, all suave and debonair, buys you a drink, flirts and showers you with compliments.  He makes you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.  Until, of course, you witness him play the same lines on another woman.  A good womanizer won’t make it obvious he’s cheating (yes, he will cheat!) and will try to conceal his women-on-the-side, but that doesn’t mean you can’t detect his infidelity.  He’ll get random phone calls from women that he’ll insist on taking, he’ll have increasingly pathetic excuses for being out all night, he may even call out another woman’s name during passionate love-making.  Take this as a hint.  This type of man will never be happy with one woman.  He’s easily bored and only wants to get laid.  He’s not worth your time.

The Body Builder

This man cares about his appearance.  He’s gorgeous, and he’s well aware of it, with a chiseled face and a body you can’t keep your hands off of.  And how did it get that way?  Yeah, the 9 hours a day he spends at the gym 5 days a week.  This is the type of guy who is obsessed with achieving 3.2% body fat and so spends all of his free time working out.  The rest of the time will be spent in front of the bathroom mirror, flexing his muscles and perfecting his tough-guy look.  You will never see him except when it’s advantageous to him.  There’s nothing this man loves more than a swooning woman hanging off his chiseled arm to complete his ultimate goal of being the most attractive, strongest, manliest guy around.

Did you know that some basic household items can be used to enhance your own beauty without breaking your budget?  I have decided to share some of my favorite secrets here. 

The best way to exfoliate tired hands is by using coarse sea salt or kosher salt, warm water and a good hand cream.  If your hands are not feeling their best, simply pour a generous amount of coarse salt into the palm of your hand, adding just enough water to slightly moisten it.  Using a vigorous motion, scrub your hands together with the sea salt.  The more you scrub, the smoother your hands will feel.  Don’t forget the backs of your hands and in between your fingers too!  When you are done, simply wash the salt down the drain and thoroughly rinse any of the remaining salt.  Pat dry with a soft towel, and slather freshly exfoliated fingers with your favorite hand cream.  Voila, your hands will feel smooth, silky and gorgeous.  You can do this once a month, or twice a week depending on what you like. 

If you are in a pinch and have run out of eye makeup remover, take one part warm water, and one part olive oil – or even baby oil, if you like.  Using a small, clean bottle, combine ingredients and shake several times.  You now have a great way to remove eye makeup without harming your eyes.  I find it to work as well as eye makeup remover, even removing stubborn waterproof mascara.  One warning is to not leave the mixture in your cupboard for too long, as bacteria can pollute it, and irritate your eyes.  Dump the mixture out and replace after a few uses.

Olive oil is also a great replacement for traditional store-bought hot oil treatments for the hair.  To deep condition dry, damaged or frizzy hair, dampen hair and add a small amount of slightly warmed olive oil to it.  Massage into the hair, taking care to make sure you get it on the ends of your hair where most of the damage occurs.  After several minutes, simply wash out.  If you have fine, limp or oily hair, I would not recommend this because it will only serve to make the hair appear oilier. 

If you are a lover of the sunless tanner but not a fan of the orange palms, here is a quick solution to restoring your hands back to their original color.  To effectively remove the tanner from your hands, simply take a few teaspoons of dry laundry soap into your hands, add a little bit of water and mix together until it is a paste. Rub the mixture thoroughly between your palms for several seconds.  After a few moments, the orange color will begin to fade away.  Be sure to remove all of the soap, since it can be very drying to the skin.  You can follow this with lusciously scented cocoa body butter.  And if you have trouble reaching areas of your back with the lotion, consider using the spray sunless tanner by Coppertone.  It will complete your tan and make you look sun-kissed and ready for the beach.

If you love the feel of loose powder but have run out, just use regular baby powder and a large fluffy brush.  Baby powder also works well to refresh tired, oily hair if you don’t have time to wash.  It acts as a dry shampoo, absorbing the oil from your hair and scalp.  Once you sprinkle the baby powder into your hair, simply brush thoroughly to remove excess powder.  If you have darker hair, however, make sure to remove as much powder as possible, as it will dull down color and shine.

To whiten and brighten your smile quickly and cheaply, consider using baking soda toothpaste like “Arm and Hammer Triple Whitening” toothpaste and follow with a good rinse of “Scope Whitening” mouthwash.  The effect is by mixing the baking soda toothpaste with peroxide based mouthwash, it will instantly cause foaming action in your mouth which will actually assist in whitening teeth quickly.  If you do it every day twice, your smile will stay white, bright and absolutely gorgeous.  Just make sure not to use straight peroxide and baking soda, as this can burn the gums and cause them to bleed.  Nothing looks more beautiful than a pearly, white smile.  And always remember to floss!

Here are some other beauty tips I’d like to share…

When getting ready for an elegant soiree, nothing can wow a crowd more than a killer LBD, kitten heels and dramatic, sultry makeup.  The secret to making it look gorgeous and professional is to only play up one key feature of your face, leaving the rest soft and neutral.  If you wish to sport sexy, smoky eyes, wear a soft nude lip color or even just a dab of shiny gloss in the center of the lower lip.  In the same sense, if you choose to perfect your pout with full red lips, keep eyes soft and natural, using nude/brownish shadows along with a single swipe of mascara.  If you apply too much makeup all over, the look will be garish and unappealing.  For a “fresh” look, use a soft peach color dusted onto the apples of your cheeks.  Just be sure not to use too much, or make it too high up on the face.  If you have added too much blusher, simply use a soft powder to tone it down.  Do not try to rub the excess makeup off your face, as it will just make a mess of your face.

One area that leaves no room for bargain basement budgeting is fragrance.  The cheaper the perfume, the worse it smells.  The big difference between the lesser and higher class fragrances is that cheap perfumes use alcohol as a base where fine perfumes use perfume oil which lasts longer, and goes on more subtle.  The alcohol based perfumes tend to go on very strong, and fade quickly.  Colognes will fade quicker than full perfumes, and ladies, please!  Remember that once you have worn a perfume for several hours, your olfactory senses grow used to the perfume, rendering it very difficult for you to smell it.  Before applying more perfume, make sure that you are not just used to the smell, or it could become heavy and overpowering to people around you.  Hint:  If your perfume lingers on long after you’ve left the room, you’re wearing too much.

One of the most fun ways of updating your look cheaply is by changing your hair color.  If you have never used a color before, it would be advisable to only lift or deepen your color by a shade or two.  I always feel refreshed and beautiful after touching up my hair.  Always make sure to do the strand test and the allergy test which is posted on the box.  Warning:  If you choose to dramatically lighten your hair, you could end up seriously damaging your hair, making it break off.  If you use a hair lightening kit on dark hair, it may turn orange.  Any time you wish for a drastic change in color, visit your local salon.  I have colored my hair for years and have changed it more times than I can count.  Right now I’m loving the dark natural blonde shade which is one shade lighter than my natural color.  Mid-range colors tend to look the most natural, and if you dye your hair too deep, you could end up with unnaturally black hair. 

With the Holiday Season barreling towards us at breakneck speed, you can still look gorgeous and wow the crowd without spending your last dime on your look.  Chunky, look-at-me jewelry is in, and can sometimes be picked up for next to nothing in some of the retail shops in your local mall.  Large bejeweled rings, cuff bracelets and chandelier earrings are all the rage.  To add punch to your Christmas look, consider adding some pretty, inexpensive accessories.  Walmart carries a wide array of fun pieces, and is definitely worth a look around.  Adding large fashion pieces to everyday clothing can add fun to your wardrobe.

Some extra tips for looking great for nothing is to watch your posture.  Make sure you walk with your back straight and your head held high.  People who slouch are considered less attractive than those who walk tall and proud.  Remember to smile, and make eye contact with people. 

Most of the tips shared here are tips that I, myself have used successfully and that friends of mine have found to work.  I hope you enjoyed the article, and remember that beauty doesn’t have to break the bank.  Remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and the most important beholder of your own beauty is you!

Have a Beautiful Day! 

Both salon owners and customers are enthusiastic about this procedure once they get over the initial fear of placing their feet into a tank of small, fish that nibble on flesh. Many spa goers find a fish pedicure to be relaxing and enjoy the slight tingling sensation created by the frenzied action of the feeding fish. The pedicure performed by garra rufa fish is painless since the fish are toothless and only feed on dead skin tissue. How much does this experience cost? It can run anywhere from forty to sixty dollars for a thirty minute dip into the tank. This is profitable for the salon owner who only has to maintain a tank of several thousand small fish which he can use over and over.

So, why are health officials concerned about the growing phenomenon of fish pedicures? According to officials, a fish pedicure can cause tiny nicks or scratches on the skin which have the potential to become infected with bacteria and fungus. These fish are kept in non-chlorinated water which could be a source of bacteria and fungi that could lead to foot infections. So concerned are health officials about the growing phenomenon of fish pedicures that they’ve been banned in many states and other states plan to follow suit.

A fish pedicure is considered to be a luxury in the spas that offer it; but there’s concern about how the small fish are treated. To make them more efficient at performing their job, the fish are given little food – motivating them to attack the dead skin tissue on feet with more enthusiasm. Even upscale spas in the Washington D.C. and New York City area are capitalizing on this trend, although New York senator Jeff Klein is working towards banning this practice both for its health risks and the inhumane treatment of the fish. This could be a problem for the salon owners who have invested heavily in these fish which cost up to four dollars each.

What will be the fate of this unusual practice? Will getting a fish pedicure go the way of other ill-fated beauty trends? Many health officials are hoping so.

Are You Cleansing Your Skin Properly?

Many people with an oily face make the mistake of working too hard to remove every last bit of oil. Using a harsh detergent based cleanser and scrubbing too aggressively can scratch the skin and increase oil production due to overstimulation. When all of the protective oils are removed, the sebaceous glands pump out more which leads to further breakouts and shine. The key is to use a gentle, oil-free soap or cleanser to cleanse along with plenty of warm water. A good choice is Neutrogena Oil-Free Acne Wash. Resist the urge to be overly aggressive when you work with a shiny, oily face. It won’t help the problem and can actually cause harm.

After Cleansing an Oily Face

Once you’ve cleansed your skin with an oil-free formula, follow up with an astringent to reduce shine and seal the pores. Both Neutrogena and Clearasil make oil-free astringents that remove shine without being overly harsh. Astringent should be applied with a cotton pad using a gentle dabbing motion. Avoid rubbing the skin as this can spread acne causing bacteria around the face. Using an astringent regularly can help to improve the appearance of a shiny, oily face. Do you need moisturizer? If so, it should be oil-free and applied only to the driest areas of the face. Never apply moisturizer to an area prone to breakouts or shine.

Other Ways to Treat a Shiny Face Due to Excess Oil

To freshen up a shiny, oily face during the day, carry along a pack of oil blotting papers to remove shine throughout the day. These can be found at most drugstores. If your face still looks shiny after using the blotting paper, apply a light layer of matte, oil-free pressed powder.

Other Tips

If you have an oily face that’s prone to acne, talk to your doctor about topical Retin-A. It will not only help to prevent breakouts, but decreases oil production as well in some people. Steam cleansing the skin and applying a clay based mask can also help to reduce excess oil and shine.

The Bottom Line?

An oily face presents challenges, but choosing the right products and practicing proper skin care techniques can make the problem much more manageable.

Are You Cleansing Your Skin Properly?

Many people with an oily face make the mistake of working too hard to remove every last bit of oil. Using a harsh detergent based cleanser and scrubbing too aggressively can scratch the skin and increase oil production due to overstimulation. When all of the protective oils are removed, the sebaceous glands pump out more which leads to further breakouts and shine. The key is to use a gentle, oil-free soap or cleanser to cleanse along with plenty of warm water. A good choice is Neutrogena Oil-Free Acne Wash. Resist the urge to be overly aggressive when you work with a shiny, oily face. It won’t help the problem and can actually cause harm.

After Cleansing an Oily Face

Once you’ve cleansed your skin with an oil-free formula, follow up with an astringent to reduce shine and seal the pores. Both Neutrogena and Clearasil make oil-free astringents that remove shine without being overly harsh. Astringent should be applied with a cotton pad using a gentle dabbing motion. Avoid rubbing the skin as this can spread acne causing bacteria around the face. Using an astringent regularly can help to improve the appearance of a shiny, oily face. Do you need moisturizer? If so, it should be oil-free and applied only to the driest areas of the face. Never apply moisturizer to an area prone to breakouts or shine.

Other Ways to Treat a Shiny Face Due to Excess Oil

To freshen up a shiny, oily face during the day, carry along a pack of oil blotting papers to remove shine throughout the day. These can be found at most drugstores. If your face still looks shiny after using the blotting paper, apply a light layer of matte, oil-free pressed powder.

Other Tips

If you have an oily face that’s prone to acne, talk to your doctor about topical Retin-A. It will not only help to prevent breakouts, but decreases oil production as well in some people. Steam cleansing the skin and applying a clay based mask can also help to reduce excess oil and shine.

The Bottom Line?

An oily face presents challenges, but choosing the right products and practicing proper skin care techniques can make the problem much more manageable.