Bill's Poker Blog

The One Handed Update

2009-11-03T05:58:58-08:00

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The One Handed Update

As mentioned previously it looks like I did a number on my right arm. Things have improved quite a bit since my last post though I’m still limited to typing one handed. I would say I’m at about 80% use of both my arm and hand as the doctor suggested and each day brings minor improvements. Hopefully I’ll be posting in full form again soon as I’ve got a lot of topics I want to discuss.

I still can’t write so the last few weeks of Thai classes where we’re learning to read and write in Thai script have been difficult. Actually, I have better comprehension of the reading due to the fact I process characters better than vocabulary. I’ve also purchased several children’s books designed for Thai youngsters first learning to write so I’ll put in the extra time picking up the mechanical skills once I can write again. The look on the cashier’s face when I buy Thai children’s books is priceless.

One of the things I realized the other day is that there is a certain freedom living in an environment where you don’t really understand the language. You can sit in a restaurant or on the sky train and the conversations going on around you never enter your active consciousness. You live in your own little world.

As you begin to learn the language more and more you can pick out words and phrases and your mind begins to become active in what’s going on around you. Your little refuge of solitude is invaded and is no longer yours.

An example of that happened to me the other night. After going to Korean BBQ dinner (lesson: trying to eat with chopsticks left-handed is pretty much useless if you’re right-handed) out in the boonies (10 min taxi ride past the farthest train stop) to celebrate the birthday of a friend’s wife I ended up stopping by another friend’s bar in central Bangkok for a nightcap on the way home.

The place was dead. The owner (my friend) wasn’t even there. The only customers were some guy playing pool with the two girls he had brought with him. One of the gals was obviously his girlfriend and the other seemed to be her tagalong friend.

I pulled up at a seat near where the cashier was sitting and the waitress and bartender joined us as we caught up with each other. I asked the trio if they wanted a drink and the bartender went to get us a round.

Out of nowhere pool guy’s girlfriend is standing next to me and asks “Buy drink for me too?” To be honest for a second I was speechless as the request violates so many rules of Thai etiquette that I was temporarily in shock. When I finally could muster a response I simply smiled and said “Sorry, no.”

She pressed asking why not and I said to her “I have three reasons. 1. I don’t know you. 2. I try to make it a rule not to buy drinks for women who are already with a guy. And third and most importantly, you have a full drink sitting right in front of you. You don’t need a drink.”

She did the old Thai huff women do when they don’t get their way and walked away. I thought that was the end of it.

But then she shouted in Thai to the bartender that the “farang khii nok” won’t buy her a drink.

You ever have a moment where if your life was a television show or movie there would the sound of a record being scratched? Yeah, it was like that.

The staff in the bar know I speak some Thai and I’m taking classes but I rarely speak in Thai with them. What they were unsure of was whether or not I understood what was just said. They all looked at me saucer-eyed like deer caught in the headlights.

Oh to be able to live in that world of not understanding. But, unfortunately, I not only understood it but understood what “farang khii nok” means.

Literally it means westerner + bird shit so bird shit westerner. But it’s also a slang term in Thai to call someone a stingy foreigner, which seemed to be her meaning here. And in Thailand calling someone a stingy foreigner is a much bigger insult than merely calling someone cheap back home.

So I calmly turned around to her and all in Thai I said, “No, the farang is not stingy. The farang doesn’t want to buy you a drink. Don’t speak in Thai because you think farang doesn’t understand. ” I don’t know why Bill decided to talk about Bill in the third person. Maybe Bill thought it added dramatic effect.

Instead of the huff I got before she sort of slinked away with her drink to the other side of the bar. When her boyfriend finished his game with her friend she told everyone she wanted to go and they left.

Nobody said anything about it until the door closed behind them and the cashier jumped up and high-fived me (btw, the gal in the first photo from the Halloween pics is the cashier).

Hmmm . . . what else is going on?

Oh the quickest way to get me to punch you in the face is if you ask me what street I live on and I tell you Ratchadamri and you ask “Ratchada?” I’m really not sure why Thais have a fetish for only listening to part of what you say but there is Ratchadapisek which people commonly call Ratchada Rd and Ratchadamri which hosts two of the country’s best hotels (Grand Hyatt and The Four Seasons), one of the best known temples/shrines (Erawan), and the second largest shopping center (Central World). Ratchadamri also has two major sky train stops (Ratchadamri and Chit Lom). Despite all of that 50% of all taxi drivers will ask “Ratchada” whenever you say “Ratchadamri.”

What makes it even worse is you say “No. Ra Tcha Dam Ri. Damri. Ratchadamri” and they counter “Ratchada?” I’ve asked Thai friends if I mispronounce the name or say it in a way that is could be misunderstood and have been assured that my pronunciation is correct and easy to understand so I have no clue what the confusion is.

It’s like one night when I wanted to help at a charity event feeding the homeless. We were meeting at Democracy Monument. I stopped five different taxis and none of them knew where Democracy Monument was. I even described the area and the surrounding landmarks but they would claim to know and then offer to take me to the landmark they recognized rather than where I was asking to go.

I was so tilted at that point I didn’t bother to flag down a sixth taxi and just went home.

What else?

Oh, last night was the Loy Krathong festival. Basically they make small little boats about the size of a dinner plate out of banana leaves and decorate them with flowers and candals and then send them afloat on the rivers and canals. Really quite beautiful to watch.

Asking Thais about the meaning of certain festivals or Buddhist customs is like asking someone to explain what the Easter Bunny has to do with the resurrection of Christ. The version of Loy Krathong I commonly hear is that it is to obtain good luck from the river angel. But some versions also throw in something about asking for forgiveness for polluting the river.

They also do beauty contests as part of the celebration. The girls dress up in traditional Thai outfits and look absolutely stunning.

Highly recommended.

Anything else?

Asians dig some crazy stuff. Go into a 7-11 or any sort of quick-mart and you will see some of the craziest flavors ever. In the mood for some sea weed and fiery pepper flavored potato chips?

I screen grabbed this page off of McDonald’s Thai site (click to enlarge). Yes, Spinach Pie is marketed as a desert. So is Corn Pie. Another that they don’ feature here but the advertise at my local Micky D’s is Broccoli Pie. Mmmmm … good.

You can even get corn as a topping on your ice cream in some ice cream shops. Corn? Who thought of that one?

Anyway, that’s it for me. Took me three days to write this so hope the hand is back in full form by next week and I can write about something interesting.

One Handed Typing . . . Not What You Think I swear I have a lot to write about...
Learning Thai and Doing What I Was Hoping Never to Do Later on today I start my first actual Thai...
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Poker Face

2009-11-01T05:48:42-08:00

Thanks for reading Bill's Poker Blog. You might want to check out his other sites:

Poker Job Search is a resource for people who are looking to get started in the online poker industry.

Rakeback Report Get the best rakeback deals from the biggest online poker sites. Learn how you can make a living playing poker.

Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

Poker Face

Cartman from South Park singing Lady Gaga’s Poker Face has been making the rounds.

But Christopher Walken gives Cartman a run for his money.

No related posts.

Halloween Pics

2009-11-01T03:46:20-08:00

Thanks for reading Bill's Poker Blog. You might want to check out his other sites:

Poker Job Search is a resource for people who are looking to get started in the online poker industry.

Rakeback Report Get the best rakeback deals from the biggest online poker sites. Learn how you can make a living playing poker.

Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

Halloween Pics

Just some pics from the Thailand Friends party at Det5 on Soi 8 in Bangkok.

Some Pics From the Trip Just wanted to share some photos before I head to...
Pics From APT Party My friend J-Dawg forwarded these pics from the APT party...
Very Quick Update Thanks to everyone who has sent me a message asking...

One Handed Typing . . . Not What You Think

2009-10-19T23:52:48-07:00

Thanks for reading Bill's Poker Blog. You might want to check out his other sites:

Poker Job Search is a resource for people who are looking to get started in the online poker industry.

Rakeback Report Get the best rakeback deals from the biggest online poker sites. Learn how you can make a living playing poker.

Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

One Handed Typing . . . Not What You Think

I swear I have a lot to write about but you might have to wait another week or two for it to appear. Allow me to explain . . .

Last Tuesday morning I awoke and my right arm was still asleep. We’ve all slept weird and had a limb go numb on us before but this was different because my arm was still asleep an hour after I woke up. I started to get a little worried. At the two hour mark I was well into the worried zone. At three hours I was freaking out. I could see my arm was still there but it was as useless as a slab of dead meat hanging off of me. Even to do something as simple as raise my arm to my chest I had to whip my shoulder around and try to catch my lifeless appendage.

I figured it was time to seek professional advice so I went downstairs and hailed a taxi and asked him to take me to BNH (Bangkok Nursing Hospital), a private, world-class care facility about a 5 min drive from my apartment.

Upon arrival I was asked if I had been seen there before and when I responded I hadn’t I was given a form to fill out. Well, I’m right handed so even making an X in the No Known Allergies box was like sketching the Mona Lisa for me. The receptionist saw my difficulty and offered to write in my responses.

I was immediately taken to orthopedics where I waited all of about 2 min to see a doctor. He tested various reflexes and said “Can you feel this?” several times (I couldn’t) before diagnosing me with a pinched radial nerve. He hypothesized I had pressed the nerve against a bone so hard and for so long while slept that I had actually caused some damage to the nerve.

He splinted my arm to keep my wrist straight (preventing possible other nerve damage), prescribed me vitamin B12 (supposedly aids in nerve repair), and told me to come back on Saturday so he could see whether or not my condition was improving.

Total cost? About $120 USD

On Wednesday I was able to wiggle my fingers a bit and I had regained some use of my elbow. I could now raise and lower my arm at the elbow but often overshot where I wanted it to stop. On Thursday I could make a fist but didn’t have enough grip to even turn a door handle. I was getting a tad more accurate with the elbow movements but I really had to concentrate on stopping my arm at the appropriate place.

On Thursday I had my Thai class and we were just beginning to learn writing in Thai script so when the teacher saw my arm in a splint and sling I knew she wasn’t happy. I did bring a camera though so I could photograph the whiteboard with the intent to hand copy the notes when my hand was back to normal.

Friday saw only minimal improvement as did Saturday. I saw the doctor again on Saturday and he retested everything and he seemed quite happy with the improvements telling me that at a minimum I would have 80% – 90% functionality back by 2 weeks and 100% no longer than 3 months but most likely much sooner. He gave me a new prescription for more vitamin B12 and said to come back in two weeks if I wasn’t back to at least 80% functional. Again, the bill ran about $120.

I’ve noticed little improvements each day since then. For instance I can now drum my fingers on the desktop. I still can’t use my right hand to type though as I don’t have enough dexterity to keep up with my left hand nor do I have enough feeling in the hand to know when I’ve pressed down hard enough on the keys.

I’ve also had other discoveries about being one handed as well. Like how hard it is to tie your shoes or wash the left side of your body.

I will say that the other side of this experience has been in seeing how wonderfully nice Thai people can be. The security guard in my building asks for daily updates on how my arm is doing and jumps up to open doors and help me with anything I’m carrying. Merchants that I usually just exchange a wave or polite smile with when I walk past on the way to Thai class have come out of their shops to ask about my arm. Random waitresses in restaurants would ask what happened and would take extra care in serving me. Even a friend of mine offered to come by my place and help out with laundry or anything else that needed looked after around the apartment if I bought her lunch (I did and we went to go catch a movie afterward). Where do people do that in a city with 11 million people?

Anyway, hopefully I’ll be posting again soon. I also might be a little slow in responding to emails during that period as typing one-handed (for whatever reason), hunting and pecking around the keyboard, is a bitch.

The One Handed Update As mentioned previously it looks like I did a...

On the EV of Mouse Smashing by Tommy Angelo

2009-10-15T01:46:25-07:00

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Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

On the EV of Mouse Smashing by Tommy Angelo

I just got off the phone with a mouse smasher. Or you could call him a mouse masher. (It sounds the same either way, whether you are saying it, or doing it.) I’m going to call him Humphrey. The topic was poker coaching. During the conversation, Humphrey asked some questions I had heard before:

Q: Did you really fold pocket aces before the flop just for the hell of it?

A: Yes. Can you think of a better reason?

Q: I tilt. Can you straighten me out?

A: No. But you can.

Q: What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?

A: I don’t know. And I don’t care.

Okay, I admit. Nobody has asked me that last question. But I’m ready if they do!

I asked Humphrey to elaborate on his tilting. Here’s what he told me…

“Usually my tilt is merely a percolating, churning, grinding, retching, undercurrent of suckiness and ill-being.”

“You don’t say.”

“But sometimes,” said Humphrey, “it gets really bad. It’s as if a tightly coiled spring of Reardon metal suddenly unwinds at the speed of insanity. The metal impales my arm and seizes control. My hand grabs my mouse, and then, with the zip and accuracy of a third baseman throwing to first, I fling the mouse at the wall and – kaBLAM, chinkle tink thunk – the mouse comes to rest, in pieces, on the floor, as do I.”

“And you call that tilt?”

“Of course it’s tilt! What the hell would you call it?”

“I’d call it a religious experience.”

“A what?”

“Think about it. You were redeemed. You were liberated. You were saved. Sounds like religious talk to me.”

“I wasn’t saved! I was violently enraged!”

::: insert soothing exhale here :::

“Let me ask you something.”

“Okay,” said Humphrey.

“How much is your typical win or loss per session?”

“I’d say it’s in the $200-$400 range.”

“Let’s say that instead of smashing your mouse, you had sat there and kept playing, swimming against your undercurrent of suckiness. What do you think your EV would have been for the rest of that session?”

“Not good. At all.”

“Okay. One more question. How much does a mouse cost?”

::: pause :::

“You’re right, I was saved,” said Humphrey.

“Yes you were. This time. But from here on in, it won’t be so easy. Now that you have seen The Way, you will need to develop an entirely new disciplinary practice, one that has never before existed on this earth. Are you ready for a challenge?”

“Possibly. What is it?”

“When you venture forth to acquire your replacement mouse, you will be tempted by the tilt demon. You must be prepared to defend, like a warrior, or else you will surely be slain.”

“Go on.”

“Hanging in the aisles of merchandise, or browsing through an online store, you will see many mice before you. But you must purchase only one. For if you were to…”

“Okay, okay, I get it. You’re saying that if I’m such a tilt monkey that it’s sometimes hugely plus EV for me to smash my mouse, that I should embrace my rodent-killing ways. And to ensure I make money from mouse smashing, I must never buy more than one at a time. This isn’t the world’s most complicated idea.”

“True. Yet there are few master mouse smashers.”

“So is that it? Aren’t you going to break into some speech about how I shouldn’t let myself get that tilted in the first place?”

“Sounds like you already know that to me.”

Want more Tommy? His book, Elements of Poker, contains his best advice in his distinctive style. Buy it from Amazon or personally inscribed from his website at TommyAngelo.com. Also at his website you can read Tommy’s blog and all of his old articles, and find information on his one-on-one comprehensive coaching program.

photocred to ✁☄ KAIRUUINZURO ✁☄

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Are Network Operators A Core Problem In Rakeback?

2009-10-10T03:19:29-07:00

Thanks for reading Bill's Poker Blog. You might want to check out his other sites:

Poker Job Search is a resource for people who are looking to get started in the online poker industry.

Rakeback Report Get the best rakeback deals from the biggest online poker sites. Learn how you can make a living playing poker.

Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

Are Network Operators A Core Problem In Rakeback?

eGaming Review had a pretty interesting guest blog post by Tom Galanis, director, GameOn Affiliates. Basically, his premise was that the problem with rakeback has less to do with the affiliates and the players and has everything to do with the operators. His position is that basically the rooms are the ones who have turned everything into a sign-up bonus bonanza and avoided other marketing efforts thus making everything ONLY about the money. I’m paraphrasing so if I’m a little off in that summary someone please feel free to correct me.

I probably agree with Galanis about 75% of the way but have to give him some space on the other 25% because of the article length limits at eGaming Review’s blog. He might have better explained that other 25% and had me fully on board.

Basically, the part where I disagree is that it sounds like he’s saying it’s an either or thing. Either you compete aggressively on bonuses and such or you do social media. That may not have been his intent but it was how I read it.

I recently discussed some similar views in my post about bwin purchasing a MMOG site. Major portions of the losing players in poker play predominately for entertainment. The industry, in general, hasn’t caught on to that fact. They still market primarily to the transient player base who are heavily influenced by which site has the best rakeback or the best bonus offers.

For instance, Bodog Network’s recent claim they have solved the rakeback problem really did nothing to help sites on their network recruit casual players. Their product offers little or nothing to distinguish it from the hundreds of other online poker sites. They have not created a hook or USP (unique selling point) that differentiates their licensees in an already crowded marketplace.

No site is standing up and taking a bold new approach. They are either happy with the current business model or too scared to do something different. The rooms at the top of the heap obviously have no problem with the current environment. All of the industry consolidation is benefiting them and they continue to grow. But the middle and lower rooms seem too scared to actually try anything innovative. They keep trying to offer what has become a commodity product, which means that they only thing they have to compete with is price.

So in that respect Galanis is dead on. If you’re a poker site on a network you’re very limited to how you can differentiate yourself from any other site on that same network. Changing the color of the felt on the table really isn’t a USP. And most networks have a limited API for the licensees to build off of so basically all you have left to stand out is your marketing efforts. And since the biggest rooms like Stars and Tilt can outspend you a hundred times over you’re forced to resort to more desperate tactics like huge signup bonuses and rakeback.

Nothing is going to get resolved however until the industry quits viewing rakeback as a good vs. evil question and starts viewing it as a predictable response to market conditions.

Photocred to chrischappelear

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A Swing and a Miss AKA Bodog Network’s Rakeback Solution

2009-10-07T12:10:43-07:00

Thanks for reading Bill's Poker Blog. You might want to check out his other sites:

Poker Job Search is a resource for people who are looking to get started in the online poker industry.

Rakeback Report Get the best rakeback deals from the biggest online poker sites. Learn how you can make a living playing poker.

Flop the Nuts Poker gives you up to date info on live poker events

A Swing and a Miss AKA Bodog Network’s Rakeback Solution

So, tell me if this sounds like a good business model: The more money you spend with us the less we value your business.

If that sounds counterintuitive it’s because it is. It’s also the reason that Bodog Network’s supposed solution to the rakeback issue has me scratching my head.

According to eGaming Review:

Losing, casual players are the type of players poker networks want, but Odman says “the way the rake is currently split, winning players get a (too) large proportion of the rake” and skins on the network end up having to slash their margins to put the rakeback deals on the table needed to attract high-raking, winning players. This progressively erodes the money left in sites’ marketing budgets to spend on attracting losing, casual players, starving networks of the liquidity they need to grow in a sustainable manner.

Odman says his company will address this by allowing “operators who bring in losing players to make significantly more money than today. This will encourage them to market their poker product even more. Winning players, on the other hand, will be worth so little that there is no point competing for them”.

Odman added: “The new system will create a much better poker economy for all: operators, affiliates, and poker players”.

Sorry for the aggressive quoting but I think this sounds so bizarre that I wasn’t sure I could paraphrase it without losing something in the translation.

Anyway, Odman being quoted above is Jonas Odman the vice president of Bodog Network.

So, according to this strategy if you’re a high-raking winning player Bodog Network suggests that you are less valuable to them than the fish.

I sort of get the idea. Believe me, this is a concept that gets kicked around quite a bit within online poker companies. Basically you have net depositors and net redeemers (withdrawers). The net depositors are your losing players and it should come as no shocker that net redeemers are winning players.

Net redeemers extract value from the poker economy / ecosystem. Every dollar they withdraw is money no longer circulating in the poker economy of that site. But, as one might imagine, they generate lots of rake for the poker room and they also create liquidity because they usually multi-table for many hours every month.

Therein lies the problem. Most smaller rooms – like the ones who might be on a network – rely heavily on their high-raking winning players. Those are the bread and butter of the small poker rooms. If Bodog is going to make winning players “worth so little that there is no point competing for them” no matter how much Bodog thinks they can kick back to the licensee for marketing to more fish it’s not going to be enough.

Believe me, if smaller operators knew how to acquire net depositors in a cost effective manner they wouldn’t be falling all over themselves trying to snag high-raking winning players. I mean, most rooms are only making razor thin margins on these guys anyway. By the time you factor in network fees, rakeback (or under the table deal), bonuses, etc most network licensees are only seeing 5% – 10% of the rake generated. Hell, some are probably losing money on the deal (which often happens at rooms where territory/affiliate managers can cut deals but don’t have direct P&L responsibility so they strike deals that make their numbers look good but the site loses money).

So exactly how much of a haircut are they going to put on the winning players’ rake that they’ll discourage sites already only making 5%?

Or maybe they’re hoping that by paying out extra on losing players that the rooms will go after those players. That sounds good in theory but I’m not so sure it works well in practice. Like I said, if the sites knew how to do this they wouldn’t be stealing customers from each other.

One of the reasons it’s difficult is let’s say you get an uber-fish. He makes a deposit for $100 and gets pocket aces his first hand. He shoves and gets sucked out on. How much rake did that hand just generate? Maybe $3 (with a capped rake of $3).

On the other hand if you land someone semi-skilled they might deposit the same $100 and win another $100. But they likely generated far more than $3 in rake in doing so.

One could argue that that is a very unfair comparison but the vast majority of new customers are one-deposit wonders. They make a single deposit (usually the minimum) and the site never sees them again once they lose that money. Granted they don’t all lose it in one hand but they don’t tend to generate a lot of rake either.

So what Bodog is proposing is that the site put all its efforts into recruiting players where over 50% are never going to make a second deposit and if they do and eventually become winning players, Bodog is going to reduce your payout so drastically as to make the player worthless.

Overall, I think it’s a creative solution but fails in the sense that it is addressing the wrong problem. Some of the theory behind it is actually where poker rooms might go in the future but it will be to limit the cost of affiliate programs not to stop rakeback.

The problem with network rakeback has nothing to do with the value of the players. It has to do with rooms stealing players from each other. The solution to that problem is not to penalize a room for having winning players but to penalize them for stealing each other’s players. And this solution doesn’t really do that.

Believe me, Ongame has zero problem with a licensee stealing customers from an iPoker licensee. Are Stars and Tilt crying about the consolidation going on in the industry where players are leaving smaller network sites and playing on their site? No.

I don’t want anyone to get the impression that I’m unaware that winning players extract value out of the system. They do. But poker is a zero sum game (disregarding rake). If you attack today’s sharks then someone else simply rises up the food chain and becomes a shark. You will always have winning players and losing players unless all players are evenly skilled and then they just churn each other so that they all go broke to the rake.

The problem comes in when it’s more profitable for me to steal a player from another skin on the same network than it is for me to build a healthy poker ecosystem. On a network today, only a sucker would pay the high acquisition costs to bring in fish when they can simply steal high-raking customers from other skins on the same network and let them feast on the customers of the sucker who is spending the money to bring in the fish.

The way you make it less profitable to steal customers from other skins is to penalize that behavior. Bodog thinks it’s doing that by lowering the value of the winning players but it’s not really an optimal solution compared to other possible solutions.

For instance, why wouldn’t you just build a system that looks for unnatural player migration patterns? If you can write software that raises a red flag for chip dumping it shouldn’t be too difficult to write a program that identifies rooms that are just a little too successful at luring customers away from other rooms on the same network. Unlike the individual room who has no idea where their player went, the network operator knows when Bill Rini closes his account on Site A and starts playing on Site B.

Or, what if you lowered the payout to the acquiring room when a player transferred to another skin on the network such that almost any deal being offered would be unprofitable for the acquiring room? Granted, some people do switch rooms for legitimate reasons but let’s just take a look at an example of how this could work.

Scenario A: Network that has zero tolerance policy on rakeback.

Player switches from Room A to Room B

Room A has a loyalty program that equals approx 35% rakeback. Room B is offering a loyalty program that is equivalent to 40%.

At the end of the month you pay Room B 40% of the normal rate minus any bonus expenses that were available to all customers so they can break even on the loyalty program.

Month two you pay 45% and month three you pay 50% and so on and so on so that anybody who is stealing customers maliciously will have such a long break even on their investment that it will be unprofitable for them to do so because the player always has the option of leaving the network altogether.

Scenario B: Network that allows rooms to offer rakeback

Similar to Scenario A except you would simply publish a maximum rakeback percentage allowed by any room on the network. Let’s say you set the limit at 50%.

At the end of month one you pay Room B 50% of the normal rate, 55% in month two, etc, etc. Subtract bonus expenses and voila you basically have Scenario A but with rakeback.

Some might note that affiliate and other expenses haven’t been factored in but that’s as easy to add in as the bonus costs. Basically your aim is to leave zero profit for the acquiring poker room until they’ve established a long-term relationship with the customer.

Others might ask what impact this will have on bonus whoring across a network and at the risk of being bombarded with scorching emails and comments from bonus whores . . . bonus whores are unprofitable customers to being with. Most of the sites that don’t ban or penalize bonus whoring lack the sophistication to catch them.

So where does the rake that’s not paid out go? Well, one option might be to give it to the room losing the customer as compensation for having developed the customer initially. Another option might be to put it into a bonus pool that is paid out to skins that bring in the most fish. Where the money goes is far less important than establishing a system that penalizes behavior that harms the network.

No matter how you slice and dice this up these sorts of proposals do a far better job at promoting a healthy poker ecosystem than does penalizing people for being good at poker. The good players can still get paid appropriately and rooms that steal players from other rooms on the same network are penalized. And since the player theft is the problem that everyone is trying to avoid . . . that pretty much removes the problem.

I don’t want this post to sound like I’m attacking Bodog Network though. I actually applaud them for trying to come up with a creative solution. Unfortunately, I just don’t think it will produce the result they are hoping for. They’ve been claiming that they’ve come up with the ultimate rakeback solution when all this does is provide an alternate set of incentives that might actually produce a set of unintended consequences that they don’t fully realize.

Photocred to BodogGirl

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Stop the Madness

2009-10-06T00:23:28-07:00

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Stop the Madness

I recently ran across a news story (?) that Lady Gaga has been invited to play in the Irish Poker Festival. She was also invited to play in the Asian Poker Tour in Macau. US Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps has been invited twice to play in the Asian Poker Tour.

The only problem is that it’s just an invite. You can invite anyone to anything. I invite President Obama to my next home game. I invite Winston Churchill to guest post from the dead on my blog. Fire up the press releases.

Now, I know the person who invited Phelps and Gaga to the APT event and even though he’s a friend of mine I warned him in Macau I was going to have to bust his balls on this one. See the trend you’re starting? Now every tournament trying to drum up press is going to invite a celebrity to their event because seemingly credible news outlets actually run the story.

I’m unsure what baffles me more; that poker tours/festivals resort to such tactics or the press actually running these PR stunts as news. WL, shame on you and what you’ve started. Now go lash yourself with a wet noodle and get back to writing press releases that I’ll never read :-)

Photo cred to kindofadraag

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An Arresting Development in Bangkok

2009-10-05T23:57:58-07:00

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An Arresting Development in Bangkok

I had been doing some research for a post I’m writing about what the poker scene is like here in Thailand and one of the people that I contacted ended up relaying a story that is so surreal that making it simply part of another post doesn’t do it justice.

I always love a story that starts off with “I can’t believe I never told you about this before . . .” which is how Khun RG started his tale. I forget when he first started telling me the story but every time I saw him afterward he would leak fresh details that he hadn’t previously mentioned.

Finally I got him to commit to revealing all. At first we had made arrangements to meet up with another one of the guys who was involved in the tale but schedule conflicts kept the three of us from all being available at the same time.

I got a phone call from Khun RG one evening. “Hey, I’m down here on Sukhumvit shooting some pool. Want to swing by for a few beers?” I told him sure but I wanted to hear the story from beginning to end. He agreed and I hopped on the sky train over to lower Suk to join him and this is the story that unfolded over the course of about five hours and numerous beers. Mind you, some parts ended up being told somewhere around 3 or 4am in the morning as we sat on plastic chairs on Sukhumvit road drinking beer from street vendors who cater to the vampire crowd.

And at some point in the evening I got my fortune told by a gypsy fortuneteller. I don’t quite remember what she told me was in my future but I do remember that most of what she said about my past was almost universally false. Still the best 200 baht I spent all night not counting the beers.

Oh, the things I do just to bring you guys original content.

Several years ago Khun RG had been a part of a group of guys in Bangkok that used to meet up from time to time for a friendly game. It’s a high-stakes game with a buy-in of $2000. Just kidding, that’s 2000 baht, which is about $60 USD. Basically it’s your typical homegame. Nobody is getting rich and nobody is going to feel it too hard if they lose.

The guy who was organizing the games had put feelers out for more players by posting about the game on a site called meetup.com that helps people of similar interests come together. Many of the regulars in the game had known each other before the online invite went out but a few newbies who had seen the online posting would pop in and try their luck.

Now, the first thing you have to realize is that all forms of gambling are illegal in Thailand . . . except the government run lottery or buying a drink for a woman with an unnaturally deep voice. Police love busting up sports books, illegal lotteries, and from time to time a mafia run underground casino. It makes big headlines which the cops absolutely love. But for the most part they turn a blind eye to the farangs (western foreigners) because they figure we can afford it and farangs usually don’t get mixed up in Thai run gambling where we might accidently win and upset the natural balance of things.

So the whole idea to openly post a game on an online site was taking a bit of a risk. But Thais, and especially Thai police, tend to be pretty behind the times in technology and the meetup was posted in English for farangs so maybe that influenced the organizer’s risk/reward calculation.

One particular night a fellow with a German accent says he’s come for the game. When he asks if there are any “pros” playing in the game more than a few of the players start licking their lips at the dead-money about to join the action. He says he has some friends downstairs he wants to invite too if it’s okay and the organizer tells him to bring them on up.

One of the guys at the table jokes “Wouldn’t it be funny if the guy brought a bunch of cops back with him?”

The funny thing about jokes is sometimes that’s exactly what happens.

As everyone was starting to get settled in for the game the door opens and four or five Thai guys dressed in typical Thai street clothes walk in and say hello to everyone. My friend said he remembers thinking it was odd that some Thai guys would be up for poker but it wasn’t until one of the Thai men leaned over the table and his badge became visible that anyone seemed to have a clue to what was going on.

The police politely informed everyone that they were indeed police officers and that unfortunately they were going to have to arrest everyone. That’s what I love about Thais; even when they’re arresting you they’re polite to a fault.

Many of the regular players in the game had been in Thailand for years and had connections in the Thai police, Thai military, and other parts of the Thai government so they weren’t too concerned since they figured all it would take is a few phone calls and everything would be sabai sabai (chilled out). In fact, my friend said that when they were asked to get into the paddy wagon some of them were still drinking beers and laughing.

First stop on their tour of the Thai justice system was immigration. They were placed in a cell and everyone who had contacts started dialing up whoever they knew on their phones that the police had allowed them to keep. In fact, none of them had even been searched nor anything confiscated from their person. One guy was over in the corner playing his PSP game and another had his camera out and was taking pictures.

It wasn’t until the guy started taking pictures of the guards making the illegal Cambodian’s in the cell next to them do jumping jacks that the cops even paid much notice. Of course, he was politely asked to delete all the photos.

At this point in the tale, I stopped Khun RG and said, “Making the Cambodians do jumping jacks?” Khun RG responded, “There was a cell full of them next tour ours. Yeah, I’m really not sure what that was all about. They might have been Burmese. I’m really not sure.”

Once the immigration authorities had collected all of their information (name, address, etc) the next stop was the local police station where they were to await a court hearing. Upon arrival they were finally handcuffed (the first time all evening) and placed in a cell. They figured out why they had been handcuffed when an officer later came by and told them that for a fee of 15,000 baht ($450 USD) he could authorize the removal of the restraints. Amazing Thailand.

Usually if you have friends high-up in the government, police, or military life is pretty sweet. In Thailand there are very few crimes that a quick phone call can’t resolve. Evidence can disappear. Witnesses can recant. Hell, the police might just forget that they even arrested you in the first place. As I said before, the fact that David Carradine was found dead in a four or five star hotel and there is absolutely no CCTV footage of him entering the hotel is pretty much evidence that whoever he went back to the hotel with had some high placed friends.

Amazing Thailand.

But this time it backfired on our heroes. Seems that they had contacted so many different people the police were now in the uncomfortable position of having several different higher-ups asking questions. They couldn’t just let the boys go now because they were unsure of how many people knew. If they took a bribe now they would be unsure how many different people they would have to kick back a piece to. One of the police who had previously told them that they should be out in a few hours with a small fine now had to deliver the news that they would likely be deported immediately.

On top of that there was a small complication in the matter. According to Thai law, 10 or less people gambling is just 10 individuals gambling. As soon as an 11th person joins in the organizer is running an illegal casino, which is a far more serious offense. Anyone want to guess exactly how many people were arrested at the poker game?

Now keep in mind many of these guys have wives and families in Thailand. Some own businesses and condos. How can normally upstanding residents of the kingdom find themselves being deported from a place they consider to be their home? To say that the mood in the cell changed dramatically might be the understatement of the century.

How do you go from playing a friendly game of poker over some beers and laughs to having your entire world turned upside down? In the Thai courts on matters like this there is no appeals process. You get sentenced and they drive you directly to the airport and put a big stamp in your passport that says you are no longer welcome in the kingdom. Have a wife and kids? Too bad. Have a business? Too bad. You’re deported. End of story.

Over the next several hours as they waited for a hearing the seriousness of the situation continued to set in. People started discussing how they were going to get their assets out of the country and what their next moves might be. The laughing and drinking beer in the back of the paddy wagon seemed like lifetimes ago. Right now, the only concern was how best to completely restart their lives.

They sat in the cells for hours as they waited. Finally they received word that they would be fined an average of about 1,000 baht (a tad shy of $30 USD) each, would receive a suspended sentence (thus a criminal conviction on their records), but would NOT be deported.

Next stop was back to immigration where they sat around for an indefinite amount of time waiting for the formalities of the paperwork to be signed-off, cleared, and forms filled out in triplicate.

So almost 24 hours had passed from when the Thai police officers had entered the apartment until Khun RG was putting the key into the door of his own apartment but at all things considered 1,000 baht was a cheap price to pay compared to the alternatives.

Would Khun RG play in another home game in Thailand, I asked? He just smiled.

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Nolan “Balla” Dalla’s Attack on Democrats

2009-09-16T21:51:56-07:00

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Nolan “Balla” Dalla’s Attack on Democrats

Nolan Dalla recently wrote an interesting article that I think is worth a look for Americans. In the article Dalla points out that one of the biggest obstacles for legalized gaming in the US is no longer the Republicans but nanny Democrats. Even though we have a Democratic controlled House, Senate, and White House bills like Frank’s anti-UIGEA bill are making no more swift progress than they did with Republicans in charge.

But that was to be expected . . . unless you’re one of those folks who likes to live with their head buried in the sand. Back in Feb of 2007 I addressed various myths about the UIGEA. One of those myths was:

Myth: Democrats in office are good for online poker

Fact: Just because Republicans passed the UIGEA doesn’t mean that Democrats love gaming. Some of the biggest opponents to online gaming are powerful Democrats like Sen Dianne Feinstein of California who had this to say:

While the advent of the Internet has clearly been beneficial to American society, the same cannot be said for Internet-based gambling activity. Internet gambling is too easily accessible to minors, too subject to fraud and criminal misuse, and too evasive of state gambling laws. For these reasons, I have supported legislation aimed at curbing Internet gambling during my tenure in the Senate. For example, in the 108th Congress I co-sponsored the “Internet Gambling Funding Prohibition Act” (S. 627), which was introduced by Senator Jon Kyl (R-Ariz.). Unfortunately, this bill was not signed into law, however, I plan to continue to support limits on Internet gambling should any legislation be considered by the Senate in the 109th Congress.

This isn’t going to be a Democrat vs. Republican debate. Each legislator needs to be vetted individually.

Dalla points out the same saying:

Consider the positions of many powerful Democrats. The fact is that many national Democratic leaders happen to be women from western states. Virtually all of these influential Democratic women are opposed to overturning the UIEGA. In other words, these proud liberals march lock and step with the most repulsive elements of the religious right. These same Democratic women champion countless progressive causes and wouldn’t agree with the likes of Kyl, Goodlatte, or Wolfe on anything except, peculiarly enough, smothering the freedoms of millions of American citizens who want to play online poker. These Democrats are just as bad as the Republicans.

He then goes on to name the following Democrat senators as some of the biggest opponents to online gambling.

Representative Nancy Pelosi (D-CA)
Senator Diane Feinstein (D-CA)
Senator Barbara Boxer (D-CA)
Representative Maxine Waters (D-CA)
Governor Christine Gregoire (D-WA)

Pelosi, Feinstein, and Boxer are Democratic party heavyweights. Those gals have a lot of power and they are all staunchly opposed to online gambling.

Dalla then goes on to suggest that the PPA stop trying to win this battle on logical arguments.

For far too long, groups like the Poker Players Alliance (PPA) believe they can win the political debate with simple logic. Sure, our argument is better than their argument and most rational people would agree after listing to a five-minute exchange, but this isn’t a high school debate class. It’s a political street fight versus powerful forces camped out on both the right and the left. Until the PPA rolls up its sleeves and dives into the trenches with an all-out media bombardment aimed directly at the oblivious mainstream voter, nothing is going to change.

And Dalla is 100% correct. These are people who for whatever reason are opposed to online gambling. They might have their re-election campaigns partially financed by opponents of online gambling or they might just have dogmatic viewpoint that can’t be changed. But the one thing every politician responds to is votes.

The current hot item, health care reform, is a perfect example of how logic gets thrown out the window in a political debate. Trying to put some academic out there proving that poker is a game of skill is pointless if your opponents are showing pictures of babies being slaughtered and telling people that that is a result of online gambling.

I’m not picking political sides here but I just happened to run across this video today and it demonstrates perfectly how you can remove all logic and reason from an argument for political gain.

My favorite part is when the interviewer is talking to one guy who says that fascism, socialism, and communism are all the same (starts right around 5:59). As the reporter walks away he comments “Fascism, socialism, communism. These things are apparently interchangeable. If you don’t know what they mean.”

Or the people out there protesting the appointment of czars (starts around 6:22). Of course, upon further questioning they reveal they have no idea that Reagan was the first president to appoint a “czar” and Bush expanded the calling of certain position “czars.” It also seems to show that they actually believe that these czars are given great plots of land and untold amounts of money and nobody knows what they do. They seem to think:

a) Czars began with the Romans
b) Czars have something to do with Russia and that American czars are like kings

Again, I’m not trying to pick sides in the debate. I could have just as easily searched around and found some anti-Bush or anti-war rallies and posted a good collection of completely batshit crazy people from the other side. The point is, the anti-gambling folks know that the best way to fire up the intellectually challenged is not with logic or reason but with absurdity.

And not that I would suggest the PPA go to that extreme, they do need to recognize that this isn’t going to be a war that is won by having the best argument. This is a fight that will be won using the most heavy-handed political pressuring and whoever is able to frame their argument in the best emotionally charged language.

Whip ‘em up on the right and run campaigns with great Americans who were/are fond of the game. Slap slogans about self responsibility and how poker is a game designed for the ballsy, independent American spirit. Whip ‘em up on the left by equating this to our personal freedoms being stripped of us. Make outlandish claims about how much revenue has been shipped overseas because of the ban on gambling. Show workers out of jobs when those dirty, stinking Europeans steal work from US workers (apologies in advance to my European friends. . . in America we always have to have a demon).

Dalla says we’ll never win this battle unless we change our tactics and he’s right. Perhaps my above suggestions are a tad over the top but they’re meant to be. They’re meant to illustrate the radical shift the debate needs to take. As Dalla says, “No Congressman or Senator is swayed one way or the other on any legislation without either coercion or compromise.” As a lobbyist, the PPA has one hand on the money lever but they shouldn’t be afraid to flip the switch on coercion either. You can certainly bet that all of these wacky anti-gambling groups aren’t going to be afraid to use both switches.

Go check out Dalla’s comments. Over and over in this debate since the UIGEA was passed he’s been a very pragmatic and intelligent voice . . . unlike myself. Maybe Dalla should have a much more prominent role in the PPA.

photocred to College Humor

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