Great. Not only could we not polish off our debt…

We were going to accrue more.

Before I crumpled into a heap of tears, I decided to power through our deductions and let the cards fall where they may. I grabbed our mortgage interest statement and said, ‘Oh thank God! We paid a fortune!’

Just goes to show the level of my desperation when I’m thankful for Bank of America.

Forty-five minutes and a strong cup of tea later, the amount read…

More than $5,000…

In green.

Plus, I’m still waiting for my student loan interest statement so that number will only get better.

I ran down the hallway, slid across the living room floor in my socks Tom Cruise style, all while screaming ‘WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!’ and throwing my arms in the air.

It’s over folks. We did it.

Do I think it will help me? Not really.

But there’s always hope!

As he continued to stare, I said, ‘Geez hon! Yeah, she’s hot. But just so you know, she could totally gain it all back!’

‘Huh?’ he said, staring at me with a confused expression.

‘HER!!’ I said, jamming my index finger on the hot blonde.

‘What? No. I was trying to figure out if there was a decimal in the Mel Gibson story regarding that 425 million dollar divorce case. 4.25? 42.5? I just can’t imagine not trying to work out a marriage when 425 MILLION was on the line!’ he said.

‘Oh’ I said humbly.

Great. It was bad enough when all I could focus on was finances, now I have a husband who can’t get past it either.

‘Beks won’t understand this reference, she’s too young’

Or

‘You are doing this project all by yourself?’

I feel like saying, ‘Yes, and those crazy folks at the DMV let me drive without parental supervision too!’

I keep my mouth shut, work hard, and let them re-evaluate their opinions based on my performance.

Today, someone fairly high up made a comment about ‘kids born in the 90’s like Beks’ and I thought I’d cough up a lung.

I’m all about looking young. I’ve thought about Botox as ‘preventative maintenance’ for crows feet. But now I’m worried I won’t get taken seriously without a few wrinkles.

I know. Complaining about not having enough wrinkles seems silly, but it gets old having to prove myself over and over again.

But…

I’ve learned to work harder than I should have to work and maybe that has made me a better employee. Maybe prejudices have pushed me to push myself to prove folks wrong.

Guess I’ll skip the Botox for now… but if I’m feeling lazy, I guess I could always spend more time in the sun and damage my skin.

Thirty minutes later, he left to purchase parts.

Thirty minutes after that, he returned to install the parts.

An hour after that…

I heard the furnace exhale hot air into our living room.

Woo Hoo! No furnace replacement necessary!

The bill? $179.93.

We were ecstatic about the cost. Much less than we expected. As I reviewed the bill after the repair man left, I noticed his hourly rate – $75. Three times what hubby charges for side work.

Yes, the guy was worth it and I was happy to pay but now all hubby and I can think is…

Hubby doesn’t charge nearly enough. No wonder he’s so busy all the time! We’ll have to review his 2012 prices.

Anyway, in Cosmo – er, Smart Money – they share money saving tips each month. Most stuff is common sense like keeping your tires inflated to save gas or telling you to shop around for travel deals, but this month they recommended a website called Decide.com.

I’m not a fan of promoting other websites – I mean really, I want you to stay HERE on mine – but this one actually seemed helpful. The site is meant for folks looking to buy cameras, computers, phones, etc. but aren’t sure if a new model is coming out soon.

I tried it out by checking the iPad. I’ve heard rumors on all my tech podcasts about a release date in March. Sure enough, the website said to wait on purchasing an iPad right now and gave the rumored release date in March.

The best option is to buy a nice used model, but for those who need the latest for work, this may be a good resource to help make sure you get the greatest value at the right time in the ever changing technology world. Plus, it will also help those looking for a used gadget know when there may be a flood in the market from folks who are upgrading.

Our neighbor recommended his friend to fix the furnace and we are waiting for a return call.

I have a plan of action. If the heater fix is less than a couple hundred dollars, we’ll pay cash to fix it now. More than that? We pay off our debt next month, pile on the blankets, thank the Lord we live in a moderate climate, and save money to repair it next season.

I refuse to get knocked off course.

My office distributed our tax forms on Friday and I opened mine to get a cursory look over the numbers. I started walking back to the payroll department to question them about my low income numbers before I remembered, I didn’t work for 5 months of the year.

Hmm. Maybe I need more sleep.

We are waiting to file until after the first of February since we usually have a tax form or two mailed late.

Are we seeing a tax guy this year? Nope! This will be year three of filing ourselves and – don’t tell hubby but… I kinda enjoy it.

Some of you shared some great software you use to prepare your taxes. Would you share again? I’d like to save all of us as much money as possible!

I didn’t realize how very much I rely on him until he wasn’t available. Sure there was the shopping trip, but it’s the day to day stuff that went unnoticed, like…

the fact he starts my car for me in the morning so it’s toasty warm by the time I leave for work. Trust me, I realized it as I ran out in the cold and had to de-ice my windshield.

or the fact that he packs my lunch and my nursing supplies. Sure, I pack it at night, but he puts them in my car when he starts it. I forgot them both this morning.

or the fact that he helps with the dishes after I make a big dinner. I woke up this morning and the ‘kitchen fairies’ hadn’t visited.

Snnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiifffffffffffffffffff….

*tear*

Yeah. Debt is a big part of my life. Bigger part?

That guy.

It didn’t help that Gary Allan serenaded me on the radio with ‘The One’ this morning. Just so happens that was what hubby and I danced to more than seven years ago on our wedding day.

Called hubby to tell him I loved him.

Debt is a big deal. Bigger deal? ‘That guy’ in your life. Don’t forget it.

Last night, hubby requested brown rice water for dinner to calm his stomach, but was unable to get to the store from his ‘deathbed’ on the couch.

Naturally, I’m all out of brown rice and naturally, it’s pouring down rain for my afternoon commute home.

I picked up our son, circled the grocery store parking lot for a spot, and struggled to get him out of his car seat without getting either of us soaked. I run inside, manage to step into a huge puddle of water that looked deceptively small, and grimace as water fills my hi-heels.

I walk the grocery store aisle, trying desperately not to slip with my wet shoes, and grab a bag of brown rice. Usually, after grabbing the item I need, I make a quick circle of the store, check out the sale items or grab produce. I always purchase at least one item not on my grocery list – an item I don’t necessarily need.

I looked down at my sweet son, smiling despite his snotty nose and swollen teething gums. Nope. No circle around the store. I went straight to the checkout. I didn’t even grab a pack of gum from the check stand. Total bill? $2.

Gone are my days of leisure grocery spending.

Who needs to go on a debt diet? Just bring a baby.

Anyway, I’m old school. I write checks to pay bills.

Yes, I know you can pay bills online.

I’m a nerd who likes writing checks.

I wrote a check to our utility company for about $60 and it hasn’t been cashed yet. No biggie right? Except, I wrote the check just over SIX months ago. I called about three months ago to make sure the payment was applied to my balance and it was… but the check remains un-cashed.

The friendly customer service person said my account was in good standing but when I asked her when the check would be cashed, she said to keep waiting.

So here we are, inching toward month SEVEN, and I’m confused as to what to do. Do I call the utility company and offer another check? Or do I lean back, kick my feet up, and figure it’s their loss?

What would you do?

*On a side note, this isn’t the first time this has happened to me. I paid another bill and more than a year went by. They never cashed the check and would not accept another payment because their system would not handle ‘double’ payments.

In between my cold sweats, hubby was on the phone. Turns out, his cousin is an HVAC installation guy and he owed him one for some plumbing work my husband did a few months ago.

Hubby’s cousin has been in the furnace closet for two hours now.

Whirrr. Click. Whirrrr. Click. Stomp. Slam. Whirrr. Click. Mumble. Mumble. Gzzzzrrrr.

Apparently ‘install’ guys aren’t the same as ‘repair/maintenance’ guys.

I’m sitting in our office, glass of cheap wine firmly in hand, praying the next two hours go better than the last two.

Our budget depends on it.

Baby boy started fussing a little, hungry for his dinner. I looked at him, smiled, and started asking him if he was hungry.

Asking him while singing in an opera voice.

I didn’t even realize I was doing it until about the fourth time singing, ‘AaaaaaAAAaaAAaaare you HuuuuUUUUuuuungry BoyyyyYYYYyyyYYY?’

I don’t sing opera. Um. Hubby would like to say I can’t sing at all. And before baby Cash was born, you wouldn’t catch me singing…ever. But here I was, standing in my living room, singing in an opera voice to my son.

And then I choked.

I have turned into my mother.

My whole life, my mother sang in an opera voice to children. I don’t think she’s capable of speaking to them, only singing. And I realized, I’ve picked up a lot of traits from my mother. That got me thinking, what traits will I pass to my children? I want them to be good, kind hearted, giving, etc. But what will they find themselves doing that says ‘I’ve turned into my mother!’? What stands out about me?

Will it be my goodness? My kindness? My giving?

Ha.

I have a feeling Cash will be standing in the snack aisle screaming ‘I WILL NOT buy you!!’ to the Lays potato chips when he’s thirty.

I’ve got to start being the person I want my son to become.

I may never shake the singing thing… but maybe that’s not a bad thing. It reminds me that tiny little eyes are watching.

It’s not that I don’t like what they do…

It’s that I LOVE everything and want to buy it all. My self-control in online shopping leaves a lot to be desired – especially after the arrival of our kidlet.

I thought I was safe. I don’t subscribe.

But my husband does.

Recently, he started forwarding e-mails about once a week for items we simply can’t live without. I find myself pulled in, willing to not eat for 3 days so we can buy the latest canvas print enlargement or child sized fuzzy hat.

Sigh.

I love him. He’s the most thoughtful, sweet person I know. But I finally had to beg him to stop being so darn thoughtful… and stop sending the e-mails… at least until February.

Nothing.

I was promised my salary would be adjusted by the end of the year but here we are three weeks into January and I haven’t seen anything.

Sure, it’d be no big deal if I hadn’t already started the work, but I have. I thought I knew better to agree to higher work responsibility without compensation, but I fell for the line, ‘We promise a new salary later.’

‘Later’ never came.

I’ve addressed the issue with the powers that be, and all I keep hearing is ‘soon’.

Somehow I went from having all the cards to having none.

Sure, it’s not good for you, but it’s also expensive. That $4 spent on chips could be spent on chicken or veggies.

But…

I went grocery shopping hungry (MISTAKE) and as I was buying a box of wheat crackers, I heard a bag of Lays potato chips calling my name from across the aisle. I tried to stare them down, tell them how evil they were, but the bag said, ‘I’m extra salty and crunchy. Just the way you like it!’

I moved on. Shopped a few more aisles.

But that stupid bag of potato chips wouldn’t shut up.

Sooo… I bought them…with some creamy ranch dipping sauce.

Total cost of the chips and dip? $8. Geez!

I haven’t splurged and chips and dip for… um…

I can’t remember the last time.

So, I hid them behind the Costco sized bag of Quinoa in the pantry – because hubby hates Quinoa and won’t touch the bag. Sure, I’d like to say it was because I was embarrassed that I wasted $8 but let’s face it, it’s because I didn’t want to share.

It was a heavenly week. I’d sneak a few chips here and there while hubby was cleaning the garage or playing with the baby.

Sure, I felt guilty, but man oh man was it worth it.

Last night, hubby caught me. I expected him to chastise me for wasting grocery money or for hiding them. Instead, he dove into the bag with both hands and we polished off the whole thing.

Yeah.

I wasted 8 bucks.

But sometimes, that’s OK.

If you’ll excuse me, I’m off to do 900 sit ups. My budget is a little more forgiving than my body.

No. I’m not superstitious.

Or…

I should say, I wasn’t superstitious.

That was before the furnace and garage door broke. The only two things my husband can’t fix himself. Cha-Ching!

Sigh.

We’re still looking good for a February payoff, but it will be a while before we can save our full emergency fund. I guess hubby will have to wait another few months before I can spring to replace that Charger oven mitt.

I was due for my annual x-rays and the tech person was prepping my mouth for the slides. She put the x-ray cards in my mouth, moved the machine near my face, and on her way to snap the photo, she tripped over the cord…

attached to my mouth.

The cord yanked my face into the machine and, well…

let’s just say there was a lot of blood for a queasy person like myself to handle. The fact that it was MY blood only worsened the situation.

‘Oh my…. Oh my…Oh God’ she said while staring at me wide eyed.

The instant shock from the pain brought a rush of tears to my eyes. She ran for some towels and I held them against my head to stop the blood.

‘Here, let me get you a mirror’ she said, running to the drawer.

‘Nope. Don’t think a mirror is a good call right now’ I said, wiping my head and my tears.

‘Right…’

Pause

‘Heeeeeeeeeeelp!!!!!!’ she screamed into the hallway.

The room flooded with dental folks. All of them taking turns holding the towel on my head.

My dentist sat rubbing my arm, ‘Is there anything we can do? Anything you need? Do you need an ambulance? Oh geez. I’m so sorry!’

I’ve been sued over an injury (not my fault). I know the sick feeling you have when someone gets hurt – especially in sue happy California. Because of that, you’d pretty much have to lop off a limb to get me to sue you.

‘I’m fine’ I said, still wiping the tears that couldn’t seem to stop.

‘I’m so so so so so so so sorry’ she said.

After the bleeding slowed, she cleaned my teeth – but only after I begged her. She thought the cleaning and a banged head might be too much for one day.

Obviously the bill for her services was waived.

And I got a killer bag full of dental goodies.

Guess who won’t be buying toothpaste for the next century?

Yeah. Almost worth getting my head smacked into an x-ray machine….

or not. Yeeeeeouch!

If so, it’s time to change that beneficiary on your life insurance policy.

Your life changes a lot. Make sure to update your life insurance policy (and your will).

Don’t be like us. Baby boy was born 6 months ago and we haven’t updated either one. Oops! But we are updating them today!

Get to it!

Gotta give them credit for reading my mind.

Turns out, you should take a look at your internet usage. Some cable companies are introducing limits AND extremely high usage could be a sign of unauthorized usage on your system. Uh Oh! So, being a natural optimist (Haaaaa ha ha ha ha), I ran to my computer, immediately assuming my usage would be high because some wacko had hacked in. A few seconds later, the usage popped up.

2 gigs.

No, not 2 gigs a day or 2 gigs in a week. I’ve used 2 gigs this month. And I’m pretty sure both those gigs are from downloading finance podcasts from iTunes. So much for my hacker. But it’s good to check every once in a while and remember to make sure my firewall is protecting me.

Naturally, I became fascinated with other utilities that let me live out my OCD *er* I mean, ‘monitor my usage to save money’.

Our water company offers ways for you to see how you compare to the average user. Their software allows me to monitor my water usage hour by hour so I can tell if I have a water guzzling washer or if my slab is leaking and I don’t know it.

My electric company uses ‘Smart Meters’ so I can monitor by the minute if I choose. They will also help you figure out where your energy drains are coming from. Old TVs? Energy sucking light bulbs?

OK, so maybe this new found power won’t help free up any time, but it will help cut down my utilities by zeroing in on where the biggest power/water/internet abusers are. And for all the sweet hubby’s out there, maybe you can convince your wife that the old tv is sucking all the power and you could save money if you bought a fancy flat screen.

Or not.

My husband’s friend is leaving to do government contract work in the Middle East and will be gone for more than a year. She wanted all of us to get together at a club downtown for her one last hurrah before boarding her international flight. She purchased three booths at a club downtown and was footing the bill for the pricey food.

Hubby and I made the trek downtown and waited in line at the club entrance. The ever so serious bouncer looked down at me and demanded, ‘ID?’

I pulled out my wallet and tried to get my ID out.

Tried.

If it were possible for my ID to rust from non-use, it would have.

I yanked and yanked, the line of inpatient club goers behind me staring me down, my ‘coolness’ factor dropping faster than the Dow Jones in 2008. Finally, hubby took my wallet, and after a good fight with it, my reluctant ID came out.

‘Sorry. I don’t get out much. I’ve got a kid.. and lots of debt.’ I said with an apologetic smile to the doorman.

The gruff bouncer slid me a sideways grin. ‘I feel you. Why do you think I’m here? Have a good time’ and put back on his ‘mean’ face for the next person in line.

I smiled the rest of the night. I’m not the only one struggling.

There are lots of us out there.

Over the last month, he’s been gone every night since folks wanted to get that ‘one last thing’ ready for the holidays. Right now, he’s installing lighting in a kitchen and since the homeowners can’t use the kitchen while he’s working on it, he’s been over there every night.

I’ve been doing my side work from home while our kidlet keeps himself entertained with toys our neighbor gave him – I’m SO thankful to have a happy, mellow baby – but I work slower than usual since I have to juggle feeding and rocking him while typing. We are tired – definitely hubby more than me (poor guy!) – but all this extra work makes a huge difference. We were forced to rely on our guestimated tax refund to pay off the rest of our debt but now it looks like we may have enough to put us on our way toward saving a larger emergency fund.

I just keep telling myself, it won’t be like this forever. We won’t always be this tired and we won’t always be blessed with this much work. Yes, I see all this work as a blessing – especially in this economy.

Two more months.

We paid off… $3,500 this month!!!!!!!!

We paid the money remaining in savings and had some extra from December being a 3 paycheck month and knocked out a nice sized chunk!

Here are the new numbers:

My Debt
Original Debt: $38,495.86
Added Debt: $1,781.50
Total Debt: $40,277.36
Paid: $36,084.36
Remaining: $4,193.00

Broken Down
Auto Loan 1: $0.00
Credit Card: $0.00
Student Loan: $4,193.00
Auto Loan 2: $0.00
Vet Loan: $0.00

Tick tick tick. Counting down!

That means that we need to find a new blogger to take over this blog when Beks finally pays off her debt. There is no need to have any blogging experience in the past, but it is essential that you are a competent writer, can write 3+ posts per week and you are willing to share the trials and tribulations that go along with paying off your debt. We are not looking for someone that has all the answers, but someone that is in the process of trying to get their finances in order and is willing to share their thought process whether that ends up being right or wrong.

There will be some compensation for this position although it won’t be a lot. If you think that you could do an excellent job taking over this blog, please feel free to contact us and we’ll give you more specific information, ask a few questions and request a couple of writing samples.

We will be accepting application until January 15th

They charge $10 per adult to attend the party and I always feel a little weird about it. The money goes to cover the cost of all the food you can eat and all the adult beverages you can drink. The total cost to throw the party is around $600 – which we split with my brother. When people chip in, we still pay around $100. Without people chipping in, we could never afford to do it.

I considered asking hubby if he’d think about cancelling the shindig this year – not because the expense to us, because I hate asking folks to chip in – but decided it’s best to let hubby have his fun and let guests decide how they want to spend their money.

Judging by the turnout, there are lots of folks who don’t mind pitching in 10 bucks.

All day, guests came up and said how much they look forward to the ‘pig party’ each year. Each guest left with a full tummy and a goody bag filled with leftovers. I would upload photos, but I have a feeling I’d tick off lots of vegetarians out there.

It’s definitely the most awkward party of the year for me since I’m so sensitive about money, but hubby (and his guests) love it so I have a feeling we’ll be welcoming in 2013 with a giant pig again.

I knew it would catch up with me.

I made a fresh batch of cookies the other night and grabbed my husband’s Charger football oven glove from the drawer to pull the cookie sheet out. As soon as my gloved hand touched the hot metal, I screamed and dropped the cookies on the floor. Upon further examination, I found a rather large hole in the thumb finger of the glove. My hand suffered a nasty burn.

I angrily threw the oven mitt in the trash and used another one from the drawer for the remaining cookies.

Last night, hubby made a yummy dinner and I heard him shuffling through the oven mitt drawer while the baby and I were playing on the living room floor.

‘Hey hon? Where is my Charger mitt?’ he asked.

‘It had a hole in the thumb and I burned myself so I threw it in the trash.’ I called from the living room.

Silence.

I picked up the baby and walked into the kitchen. He was staring at the drawer, deflated.

He looked up at me, ‘I know it had a hole in it. I just didn’t use the thumb part. Things have been kinda tight lately and I didn’t want to spend the money to replace it. And aren’t you always saying we need to make things last longer?’

Sigh. He caught me on that. He should be allowed to have at least one crazy frugal holdout. Plus, I should have known not to throw out a man’s football anything.

Looks like the first thing I’m buying in debt free March is a Chargers oven mitt. Sorry honey.

My favorite day of 2011? Nope, not the day I got to write a nice check to my credit card. Nope, not the day I discovered we were less than three months from pay off.

It was the day we met this little guy.

Oddly enough, paying down debt helped me enjoy that day all the more. We had prepared ourselves financially and I didn’t have to worry about scary hospital bills or returning to work before I was ready. I enjoyed every single moment – even the painful ones – because I didn’t have Visa or Master Card sitting in the visitor’s chair beside me.

Some of the folks in my life had kids this year. They talk about not wanting more – or waiting years to have another because babies are hard. I wonder if everyone received a memo I missed because…

I want 10 more.

I’m exhausted. I’m sick. At times, I’m overwhelmed…

But there is nowhere and no one else I’d rather be.

I woke up this morning at 4:30 am and snuck a peek at my sleeping son before hopping in the shower for work. His beautiful face was peacefully relaxed, his pudgy cheeks soft and warm.

I have been so very blessed in 2011. Forget having a favorite day. This has been my favorite year.

Wishing you and your family a sweet 2012.

Our mortgage is more than 50% of our income.

My husband and I make nearly the same salary. The math is pretty easy on that one.

Would I stay home if we lived in an apartment? Unlikely. We wouldn’t have daycare expenses, but we’d have to squeeze out rent and healthcare from our current budget and it’s tight as is.

Once we finish paying off debt, we’re looking at two options: 1 – Hubby finds better employment or 2 – We move out of state.

Being debt free has always been so far in the future, we never had to think too seriously on either front. Now that we’re two months away, we are starting to consider both options. Once we save up our 3 – 6 months of expenses, we’ll make the leap.

Sigh.

Next year. I’ll remember next year.

What is the gift? Food! She carefully measures out ingredients to make dinner, packages it beautifully, and prints the directions on stickers placed on the jars. It’s great for broke *cough* frugal folks like myself AND great for busy families who struggle to make a home cooked meal each night AND great for the people who seem to have everything.

This year? Soup, cornbread, pancakes, and hot cocoa!

My favorite picture?

My son was laughing hysterically on the train. It gave me hope that he’ll love this day as much as I do.

Sure, I’ve been known to buy one too many sticks of deodorant and I may hand out bottles of shampoo as parting gifts – but I don’t have a problem with buying 45 bottles of conditioner when I’m bald or 70 bags of cat food when I don’t own a cat.

But the show left me a little sensitive to my own growing personal stockpile and I decided to finish the year without coming home with any more free beauty products. Sounds like a good idea right?

Until I’m in the shower and I hear the ‘Pthh’ of the empty shampoo bottle I’m squeezing.

“Hey hon?” I yell.

“Yeah babe?” he asks through the cracked bathroom door.

“Could you please grab me another bottle of shampoo from the closet?” I ask.

Pause…

Pause…

Pause…

“There isn’t any” he says. “I looked everywhere.”

The screeching violins from Alfred Hitchcock’s ‘Psycho ‘ filled my ears as I looked at the shower alcove with my husband’s hair care. All he had was a product by Old Spice that is somehow shampoo, conditioner, and body wash all in one.

Oh. Dear. Lord.

Now, not only do I smell like a man today, my hair has a funky texture, and I owe an apology to the hoarders *cough* I mean, ‘Extreme Couponers’

I’m clipping coupons… and buying 400 bottles of shampoo so this NEVER happens again.

I’d been holding on, waiting to hit my milestone year at work. Once past the milestone, healthcare costs are greatly reduced – we’re talking a couple hundred a month.

…Until they released the 2012 rates and took away milestone benefits for longtime employees. My benefit package is nearly $200 more than I budgeted each month.

Sure, I get it. Healthcare costs are skyrocketing and I can’t expect my employer to cover it, but I was oh so sad to hear about the rate adjustment.

Hubby and I have to sit down and take a hard look at what we can adjust. I’m just hoping for a raise to clear the difference so we won’t have to cut the food budget. I’m not ready for a season of Ramen… again.

I don’t know. I’ve been told they will try to push through putting together an offer package before the end of the year. Hmm. Today is the 20th. It seems to be taking a long time.

I’ll be crossing my fingers for the next 11 days.

This year? Hubby, baby, and I will be strolling around the decorated neighborhoods and we may spring for a 99 cent movie. Now THIS is the Christmas I’ve always wanted.

My advice to those participating in Super Saturday, leave the debit and credit cards at home and stick to that cash budget. Happy shoving… er… shopping!

My husband keeps telling me to buy ‘just one pair’ as he sees me shivering in my knee length dresses heading to work. The other day, outside temps hit the 30′s and that night I came home and couldn’t seem to get warm. I could cave, buy a pair of pants from the little amount in the clothing budget and save myself from getting pneumonia OR I could hope the shivering would cause weight loss.

I looked at my pre-pregnancy pants hanging neatly in the closet, frustrated they’d been hanging there unused for WAY too long, and decided to try and squeeze myself into them. So, I pulled them up far more slowly than necessary (I’ve never been one of those folks who likes to rip off Band-Aids quickly), and waited for them to catch…

and they didn’t.

Guess who wore her wonderfully warm lined pre-pregnancy pants to work yesterday?

Sure, I look a little more J. Lo than J. Anniston, but the buttons close and that’s pretty much all I hoped for anyway. I think I heard my clothing budget cheering louder than me.

‘Life insurance policy?’ I asked.

‘Of course. I have your husband listed. Is that OK?’ she asked.

‘I’m sorry. Remind me. How much is this life insurance policy?’

Click. Type. Click. Pause.

‘We have a policy on you for $98,000.’ She started rattling off the salary ratio that determined that amount and explained how it changed with each increase in pay, and I stared at the floor, trying desperately to remember when I signed up for insurance… and how I was paying for it.

As if reading my mind, she pulled my application from her files and showed it to me.

There is was, the policy I signed up for on my very first day… and paid for by my company.

Of course, I called my husband to share about the unexpected policy and he said, ‘Well yeah hon, I have one at work too. It’s like $50K or something.’

Well, I guess we’re a little over insured. Something to keep in mind when deciding on additional insurance – know how much you already have!!

More than 15 years ago, my parents decided to dedicate Christmas Eve to spending time with the family. Just after the sun came up that Christmas Eve morning, we all piled into the family Suburban, went out to breakfast (a rare treat), walked around the big Christmas decorated mall in downtown San Diego, saw a movie (another rare treat), and went to dinner at a family friendly Chinese restaurant (yet another rare treat). Even though there were seven of us kids, I don’t remember fighting that day. That night, I crawled into bed and stared out my window at the Christmas lights, feeling as though life couldn’t get any better. For years afterward, I couldn’t sleep on the night of the 23rd because I was so excited about Christmas Eve.

Over the years, not much has changed. We shift around the plan a little on the lean years, skipping meals or picking cheap spots. Marriages and kids added to the happy crowd. Christmas slowly turned from a holiday where we looked forward to the gifts to one where we looked forward to spending that day together.

I encourage you to find that ‘sweet spot’ with your kids this holiday. The one that makes them forget they want the latest iPad or PlayStation. The one that makes them remember that when the day is over, it’s the people not the things that make you happy. When I say I’m not buying gifts this year, it’s because that’s not what Christmas is to me. It’s not about spending money – it’s about spending time.

This Christmas, if you see a massive hoard of folks young and old with smiles that would make the Cleaver family jealous, it’s probably us.

Start planning your day now, and have a Merry Christmas.

By Wednesday afternoon, I began to wonder if anyone would notice me sleeping under my desk.

Before meetings, I’d stand outside the room, flip my head back and forth to poof my hair, tell myself “You OWN this”, and throw the door open with fake energy while praying, “Please don’t let anyone notice how exhausted I am.”

Friday mid-morning, I was called into my manager’s office. I thought I was being fired. I had failed yet again. I was about to launch into, “I’m sorry about this week. I’ll work harder to be better rested next week” when I was interrupted with…

“We’d like to offer you a promotion.”

And I choked on my caffeine-free tea.

Since our debt is nearly gone, we are looking to save a healthy emergency fund, THEN and only then, focus on upgrading our home.

Anyone use solar as a way to save cash and live frugally?

Tuesday night was not good to me and I was horribly sick on Wednesday morning. I stayed home and spent most of the day on the couch sniffling and sneezing in misery.

When I reported to work the following Tuesday, I remembered I had to tell payroll about my absence.

Or did I?

If I just let things go, no one would notice my extra day. In fact, they had let everyone go home early that day and I wasn’t really robbing work of 8 hours – only 4. And, every other holiday they let people go home early, I always put in an extra 2 hours so technically they OWED me. Plus, I am underpaid! What’s a couple extra hours?

So, I didn’t tell payroll…

and I lasted a whole hour before I made myself sick and went running to payroll to correct the mistake.

Not only am I bad at fighting for raises, I’m really, REALLY bad at being a thief.

My Debt
Original Debt: $38,495.86
Added Debt: $1,781.50
Total Debt: $40,277.36
Paid: $32,498.36
Remaining: $7,779.00
Cash Savings: $2,500.00

Broken Down
Auto Loan 1: $0.00
Credit Card: $0.00
Student Loan: $7,779.00
Auto Loan 2: $0.00
Vet Loan: $0.00

*Reminder, Cash Savings is in addition to our emergency fund. When things settle next month, the $2,500 will be applied to the student loan.

Plus, work is a bit of a mess right now. They had to hire an additional person to cover my pre-promotion position. It’s frustrating to see them paying more than twice as much for the work I did easily on my own. You can bet that is coming up in the conversation with my boss’ boss.

And, some of the people I love working with most are interviewing for positions outside the company. They are irritated with the way things are going and are moving on.

It’d be easier if things weren’t such a mess but now I have a stressful work environment to add to missing my son.

Sigh.

I can do this. I can do this. I can do this.

Or I’ll just keep saying it until I can.

Oh.

So, I bit the bullet and bought one on sale.

I turned it on full blast and waited for the house to burn down and…

nothing.

I put my hand on the front, thinking surely I’d prove you all wrong and take a photo of my burned hand and…

it was barely warm to the touch.

I kicked the thing over, assuming the carpet would ignite into flames and…

the heater shut off automatically.

Turns out, you were all right. Space heaters have come a LONG way in the last 30+ years. I carefully turned it on, cleared a 10 foot radius around it of anything even remotely flammable, and crawled into bed. I woke up about every 15 minutes fearful the house was on fire but… um, yeah, it wasn’t.

In the morning, the glorious warmth of 65 degrees greeted us. Getting out of bed is much easier when you don’t have to wear a coat to do it.

Thanks for all the help!

I wasn’t surprised to hear suicide rates have increased since the recession began. Money troubles can steer a huge part of our lives. Throw in the stress of holidays and it can be too much for some.

If you are concerned that someone you know may be considering ending their life, check out the Mayo clinic for advice.

Let’s keep an eye out for others. I’d prefer not to see them on a bridge over the next few weeks.

A few days later, there were more. I caught about 10 or so scouting my pantry. They didn’t congregate. They weren’t crawling in any specific direction, just searching for good snacks.

Since I cleaned our pantry a few months ago and saw the amount of food I was wasting, I hardly buy anything. Grocery shopping is organized and limited to items on my list. There are no snacks. No chips. No cookies. Nothing but canned goods and tightly sealed bags of baking supplies.

In the past, when I caught the scouting ants, I knew I was in for it. I’d have to throw away food and spray pest killer.

Um. Not this time.

Apparently there is so little food in my house, the ants called it a day and moved out this morning. On to greener pastures and fuller pantries I guess.

Who knew living frugal would annoy the ant population?

Naturally, I thought, “What a bunch of horrible people! How can you lie to your spouse about money!? That’s HUGE!! Chris knows everything about our finances whether he likes it or not!”

The reporter then said, “I know I’ve lied about a couple of dresses.”

Uh Oh.

Minor ‘not lies but not exactly being honest about every single little purchase’ counts too? Like the pair of $20 must have shoes that migrated from the store, to my car, then secretly to the house last year? The same pair of shoes that hubby said, ‘Are those new shoes?’ when he saw me wearing them – to which I responded, ‘These old things?’

Yup. I’ve lied.

Surely lots of ladies have lied at some point or another so I asked my friends…

who all fessed to smuggling in a pair of shoes or a shirt a time or two. So either A.) Lots of people are lying about NOT lying or B.) 100% of my friends are rotten folks.

Regardless, I think I’ve done a pretty good job of being open and honest about spending habits – but there is always room for growth. Sorry hon. Those shoes were new and no, there haven’t been any since.

How about you? Please don’t tell me I’m the only liar.

I was snuggled warmly in bed catching some Z’s.

As I’ve said before, I don’t participate in Black Friday.

Hubby on the other hand, was lined up with my brother outside Lowe’s and Home Depot brimming with excitement. For some reason, I imagine him getting a running start and riding the cart across those concrete floors while ‘It’s the Most Wonderful Time of The Year’ blares as a soundtrack in his head.

He saves gift cards people give him for his birthday and other holidays for months and dusts them off on Black Friday. Our checking account remains unharmed.

By the time I wake up, he’s sitting on the living room floor surrounded by his favorite tools and he has a glass of orange juice and a muffin warmed for me. Sorry ladies – he’s taken.

How’d you fair on the most dangerous debt day of the year *er*, I mean, Black Friday?

Holidays with my parents can sometimes get a little out of control. All my siblings came into town (first time all nine of us were together for Thanksgiving in 10 years!) and my parents invited my siblings in-laws and a few folks who were alone for turkey day.

Lots of friends, lots of turkey, lots of fun.

Whew! I need a nap.

Today, my boss’ boss brought me into his office to chat. He wanted my opinion on some departmental issues then opened the door by saying, “Anything else you’d like to discuss?”

Here was my opportunity! Here was my chance to make things right!

…

“No Sir. All is well on the home front” and I saluted him.

Salute? What the heck? Am I in the military?

Whoa! And what were my feet doing? Leaving?!?!?

I screamed at my legs, “STOP YOU IDIOT!! TELL HIM!!”

I stared at my hands as they turned the heavy door handle, “Don’t go!!”

But they went.

There was no blaze of glory.

As I rode silently down the empty elevator, I stared numbly as the floor numbers lit in dissention.

*DING*

The doors opened for my floor.

As I trudged back to my office, I couldn’t help but feel as though I will never ascend to greatness if I can’t stand on my own feet.

I scheduled a meeting with him in a few weeks. Maybe I can muster some courage by then.