legallymama

Never Grow Up

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Mon, 28 May 2012 08:22:00 +0000

A few days before Mother's Day, the video of P&G's Best Job in the World commercial went viral. I've seen it shared by far too many motherhood blogs, and I've read how much tears it has caused its viewers.

I was not really a sucker for sappy videos but I went on and clicked it anyway. It was very heartwarming and Mother's-Day-ish, to say the least. But, forgive me for being anti-climactic, it wasn't tear-jerking for me at all. I guess I wasn't really the crying-over-video type.

Then, mother's day-weekend came and I have completely forgotten about the P&G video. For my first mother's day celebration, my little family (Zohan and the husband) planned to go home to my province. Aside from seeing my lola, that would mean I would have a busy Saturday morning -- making our bed, preparing our breakfast, washing the dishes, giving the baby his breakfast, giving him a bath, packing our things, and taking a bath and getting dressed, too. That would have been a walk in the park if I didn't have a clingy baby who wished to be carried all the time while I did all of that. Zohan made sure it was a memorable pre-mother's day by crying for every nanosecond that I separated myself from him. It was a stressful morning. No, stressful would be an understatement.

When I finished all the tasks (with a little boy attached to my sidewaist ala Angelina Jolie), his cue that he'd like to nurse came in. I slowed down a bit, settled on the couch and breastfed him. Since the entire morning went on like a whirlwind, the time that I sat down was the first moment of peace I had that day. For the first time that day, I actually looked into his eyes and realized how incredibly blessed I was. I had been entrusted with another being - to take care of, to nurture, and to love.. For the first time, I thanked God I had the chance to celebrate Mother's Day. Then, in a true Pinoy-movie fashion, the next song that played in the husband's laptop went on like this:

When the song was about to finish, the husband came out of the shower and checked us out. You guessed it right, he was trying not to laugh because apparently, I was the crying-over-song type. Damn Taylor Swift.

Here's the lyrics of the song, in case you want to have a good cry, too. :)

Your little hand's wrapped around my finger

And it's so quiet in the world tonight

Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming

So I tuck you in, turn on your favorite night light

To you everything's funny, you got nothing to regret

I'd give all I have, honey

If you could stay like that

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you, won't let no one break your heart

And no one will desert you

Just try to never grow up, never grow up

You're in the car on the way to the movies

And you're mortified your mom's dropping you off

At 14 there's just so much you can't do

And you can't wait to move out someday and call your own shots

But don't make her drop you off around the block

Remember that she's getting older too

And don't lose the way that you dance around in your pj's getting ready for school

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple

No one's ever burned you, nothing's ever left you scarred

And even though you want to, just try to never grow up

Take pictures in your mind of your childhood room

Memorize what it sounded like when your dad gets home

Remember the footsteps, remember the words said

And all your little brother's favorite songs

I just realized everything I have is someday gonna be gone

So here I am in my new apartment

In a big city, they just dropped me off

It's so much colder that I thought it would be

So I tuck myself in and turn my night light on

Wish I'd never grown up

I wish I'd never grown up

Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up

I could still be little

Oh I don't wanna grow up, wish I'd never grown up

It could still be simple

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, just stay this little

Oh darling, don't you ever grow up

Don't you ever grow up, it could stay this simple

Won't let nobody hurt you

Won't let no one break your heart

And even though you want to, please try to never grow up

Oh, don't you ever grow up

Oh, never grow up, just never grow up

The scar that fought no battle (My VBAC Dream Part I)

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Wed, 16 May 2012 02:54:00 +0000

His first photo, right after the CS operation

I couldn't recall where I heard it, but I certainly caught somewhere that Caesarian scars were often referred to as battle scars. I'd imagine the battle to come in the form of several hours of labor pains in an attempt to go for vaginal delivery, only to be interrupted with a uterine rupture or a fetal distress. Another battle could be against the boredom of bed rest or anxiety of constant fetal monitoring after having been diagnosed with a placenta previa. There could also be an initial attempt to do labor but after several nerve-wracking pushes, the baby's head turns out to be too large or the mommy's pelvis too small to allow the baby to pass through. In all of these, there would be a gut-wrenching pain, from labor or otherwise, followed by a relief that when everything else seemed to fail, the mother would be summoned to the operating room for incision for her own good. These mothers would end up with a scar from the CS operation, but they fought a battle, and they fought hard.

As for me, I had a scar because I stuffed myself with too much pan de sal and gulped on too much iced tea and slept until it's time for bed again. How classy.

I had always wanted to give birth via normal delivery. In fact, I had prepared myself too much for it that it hurt so bad when I was operated on. For one, I did not take things slow when I was pregnant. In fact, I felt empowered when I was that big and could still do a lot of things. I never said no to attending hearings even until the very last day that I was at work. I was taking public transportation, to boot. And when I said public transportation, I meant taking that steeeeep stairs going up to MRT Magallanes station, walking on sunshine, taking the jeepney rides instead of cabs and repeating all of that several times a week. For another, I read up on everything I could lay my eyes on if it said "how to do vaginal birth". If the next chapter was about how to prepare for a caesarian delivery, I threw the material away. The power of the mind, you know.

I guessed that arrogance caught up on me when weeks before I hit full term, my OB-gyne said in a routine check-up that I was already at early labor stage, with 3-cm dilation! My OB-gyne was holding clinic at the province because I intended to give birth in my hometown, so after that findings, she advised against going back to Manila to continue with work. That was more than a month before my due date. Since I had nothing to do at the province but bask in the love of my relatives who thought pregnant women must not be put on a diet, you could already imagine what happened next, pan de sal wise.

Fast forward to one week before my due date and during my routine check-up, my OB-gyne noticed that the baby's weight had surged to 9 pounds! Yes people, this petite frame had carried a nine-pounder baby boy, so crossing out genes and family history, you could already identify the culprit here. Right there and then, I was directed to proceed to the emergency room for a CS operation because there was no way I could deliver that big a baby through the natural method. And since I wasn't prepped for that, I did not fast (I had a sandwich, what do you expect? I was stuffing myself crazy!) so they couldn't give me the sleep-inducing anesthesia. I was wide awake the entire surgical procedure, hearing their conversation and catching a glimpse of the knife and scissors and all. When Zohan was pulled out, he turned out to be 9.2 pounds.

There goes my battle - or the lack of it - for the scar on my abdomen.

The dream of vaginal birth did not end there though because there was such a thing as Vaginal Birth after Caesarian (VBAC). In a tweet, Jenny Ong of Chronicles of a Nursing Mom mentioned that her OB-gyne was a VBAC practitioner. This news perked up the stubbornness in me and I lost no time in getting the doctor's contact details. After a few weeks, I found myself in her clinic and asking questions how I could prepare myself for VBAC. (Not that I am pregnant now, but in case there has to be a gap requirement from the first birth to VBAC, then I should probably get our calendar worked up.) She asked me a lot of questions, patient's history mostly, and gave me three basic points that would make a person a good candidate for VBAC.

Am I a good candidate? Watch out for the next post. (Oo, may ganon!)

I'm saying goodbye to google..

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Mon, 14 May 2012 12:00:00 +0000

...and saying hello to Dra. Vienne Saulog! Yes, I am now a step up to being an Alpha mom for having secured a trustworthy pediatrician for my son.

If you tolerated my ramblings long enough, you'd be aware that google was helping me raise my son. When to start with solid food? Google. What food to give him? Google. Was it okay that he didn't poop regularly? Google. Where were the branches of Anthology shoes? Google. Okay, that last one didn't count.

Well, you gotta give me some credit before you convince yourself how irresponsible a mother I was. Zohan had a pediatrician ever since he popped out from a stitch. His first pedia was the one who caught him from the labor room, while his second pedia was based in the husband's province. They both charged cheap, sure. But the problem with them was, they would only give the required vaccine shot for the month, collect the fees and wave goodbye. Too bad for them I was a first time mother who expected pediatricians to be as detailed as babycenter.com. And so, there I was in their clinics, with an expectant ear and a ready wallet, agitated to listen to what I would pay for. As luck would have it, our check-ups would be as simple as shot-pay-goodbye, EVERY.SINGLE.TIME. (There's gotta be something that they could tell me because I need to keep this blog alive!)

So, the search for the new pediatrician began. I always had Dra. Vienne Saulog in mind, because of the good reviews made by Maqui here and Maggi here. I was holding off visiting her clinic because I decided to complete Zohan's vaccines with the silent pedia, who, in retrospect, charged cheaper for vaccines compared to Manila-based pediatricians. I figured that there was really no rush because Zohan had been a well-baby (according to me!), so we waited until his 8th month. (Henceforth, his scheduled vaccines would only be boosters and would not be as often, and as expensive, I hope, as the vaccines he have had for the last 7 months!)

Last 14th of April, we visited Dra. Vienne's clinic in One Health Center in Paseo de Magallanes. We camped in her clinic with Tita Eda, Tatay, Ninang Joyce and Ninong Enzo. I was asking the entire block in lawschool if they wanted to tag along but apparently, they had busy lives.

It was all good except that we waited for two minutes, and two hours! In her defense, Dra. Vienne said her rounds in St. Luke's took longer than usual because of her scheduled out-of-the-country trip. But because she was just as talkative as babycenter.com, I forgave her. In fact, she was too accomodating to answer my ten-point questionnaire that it took us almost an hour to finish. She was very meticulous to the point that she checked up the little boy's every nook and cranny. She also asked if Zohan could recognize his name already, and the atribida nanay that I was, hurriedly said yes, he can! I called him Zohan! Zohan! I was practicing telepathy and tried to control his mind to look my way. But the kid pretended he didn't hear me. The husband, the sweet person that he was, tried to save my face and called out Zohan! Zohan! But the little boy decided, this one time, that he would not respond to his name, and would continue playing with the toy he was holding at that time. Nuninu, ni nu.

At any rate, Dra. Vienne was a welcome relief from the previous pedias that Zohan had. I would highly recommend her because finally, I would be getting my money's worth. Possibly even more.

With all these toys, he wouldn't mind waiting!

As of our last check-up, Dra. Vienne Saulog charges P500 for consultation fee and holds clinic in the following:

One Health Clinic in Paseo De Magallanes, Makati City

8538663

MWFSa 3:00 pm-5:00pm

Tue Thurs 2:30pm-3:30pm

Asian Hospital

7719334

T TH 4:00pm-7:00pm

Fri 9:00am-12:00noon

St. Luke's, BGC

7897700 loc 7737

Mon-Thurs, Sat. 9:30am-1:30pm

A Mother's Day Post

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Wed, 09 May 2012 08:37:00 +0000

I made a rather serious post about how grateful I was to my maternal grandmother, the person who raised me from childhood up until before I got married. After I hit publish, I received calls and comments from my cousins and friends telling me how touching my post was. Then it hit me that I just made a wrong move!

You know how every mother's day, you read feeds in Facebook or timelines in Twitter that everybody has the best mother in the world? Well, days before Mother's Day, I had announced here, in the most dramatic fashion, that I had the best grandmother in the world. Tough act to follow! To outdo that for my mother, I should probably stick a fork in the socket of your eyes to make you cry buckets of tears.

But you see, my relationship with Nanay was not drama-infused. It was not drama-less, though, because God knew how tear-jerking our struggles were. It was perhaps so sappy that in order to deal with it, we had to set our soft spots aside and bring out the tough cookie and humor together. When I think about it now, as I write this, I realize that there were actually very few instances in our mother-daughter relationship that we cried together - it's either one of us was crying while the other couldn't care less, or we were both laughing our hearts out without a care in the world!

The first time I saw her cry was when she returned from abroad for the first time after six long years of separation. I was in fifth grade then. That moment when she hugged me, I thought she caused me a broken rib. I was prepped to believe that it was supposed to be a touching moment and I was expected to cry. But as far as I could remember, I just stood there without a tear in the eye, looking amazed and proud because man, I was in the city and sporting a new dress! Remembering it now from a different prespective, I must say Nanay had done a great job of maintaining composure because if I were in her shoe then, I would have wailed like a crying cow on New Year's eve.

The second time I saw her cry was when we had a heart-to-heart talk after my high school graduation and I was preparing to go to college. That was a rather long talk, together with her bestfriend Tita Zynia, and it was mostly about how I should use my new-found freedom wisely. At that time, my mantra was: MUST.GRADUATE.FROM.COLLEGE. MUST.NOT.GET.PREGNANT. (I thought it worked because it was after several years from college graduation that I cooked a bun in the oven.)

The third time I saw her cry was the night before my college graduation, when I oriented her where to seat during the graduating rites. I said, very casually, that there was a special seat for parents of those graduating with honors, and that she and Nanang will have to seat there. Being the impatient person that I was, I found it difficult to put off breaking that news until that night, and to deliver it without jumping for joy - but the surprise in her eyes was so worth the wait. Besides, it was cool to deliver it that way.

I think that was the last time I saw her cry. She probably shed a few tears when I told her that I would be graduating from lawschool or that my name was on the list of bar passers, but I thought it was more of a sigh of relief and happiness that I heard. She probably shed a few tears when I broke the news of me getting married or she becoming a lola, but she made sure I did not sense it from her voice on the phone. Even before these momentous events in my life, she probably shed a few tears each time she'd miss my birthdays or recognition days in school; or when the weather abroad was too cold for her taking but I was asking for a new brickgame, so she just had to get up and work her ass off; or during that rebellious highschool stage when I preferred to stay inside my room rather than spend time with her despite her very short vacation. There could probably be a lot of times that I made her cry, but she sure did make me feel like everything was okay and we were doing fine.

Apart from those instances, we usually spend our brief days of being together laughing. And when we are apart, we'd message each other with silly things. When things got a tad too serious, she'd always end it up by concluding "ayaw ko ng ma-stress drilon!" Yes, she had gotten the hang of me and my friend's beki language, and she could really pull it off! Now that she's a nonna to my son, I'd send her pictures of Zohan thru BBM, with specific instruction not to post it on Facebook because it wasn't the boy's best photo, or I was looking really dumb in the background. She'd respond yes but I would certainly find it in her newsfeed in less than five minutes. What a zesty mother I have!

I do not intend to be all mushy for Mother's Day. I've made her a lot of notes and letters themed with tear-inducing thank you's and I know it's getting old. I wanted this to be light and funny, because that's the way she is. Her struggle to raise me alone, and her persistence to do it with flying colors, transformed her into a very strong woman. And to keep her sane while she's at it, she has been forced to take life lightly and funny. If I get just half of her humor and her strength, I'd probably be half as good as the mother that I wanted to be.

To my mudax, Happy Happy Mother's Day! Mahal na mahal kita. Yun na! =)

We don't really take ourselves too seriously, do we?

A tribute to the woman who raised me

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 24 Apr 2012 04:14:00 +0000

Circa 1940

I was breastfeeding my son while I laid down on the old hammock that had been sitting in the old house for years. My aunts were around while we caught up on each other's latest stories. I looked at the wonderful woman sitting across me. She had grown so thin. The beauty that was once so radiant was faintly there. It was slowly replaced by lines and wrinkles that bespoke of years of struggle with life's adversities. Her once gray hairs were gone. They were all silver-white now. Silently, I was wishing they meant a silver lining at the end of the tunnel.

She caught a glimpse of me intently looking at her. She then asked me who were the two strangers sitting beside me. I told her, one of them was my husband's aunt, and the other was my husband's distant relative, and that both of them were living with us in the city to help me around. She then blurted out the unimaginable.

"Napaka-yayabang. Akala mo kung sinong mayaman. Nung panahon namin ilan ang naging anak ko, ako lang naman mag-isa."

At this point, I was stunned in disbelief. I tried to explain that I had a dayjob so I need somebody to look after Zohan whenever I was not around. But she kept on repeating those lines that stabbed my heart like a thousand daggers. I was trying so hard to control the tears that were about to fall down. I was on the verge of breaking down. I decided to pretend I had fallen asleep like Zohan did. I closed my eyes and envisioned the wonderful years I had spent with that woman.

"Tingnan mo nga 'yan. Nagtutulug-tulugan. Nagbibingi-bingihan."

There were a lot of painful words I heard that day. To add insult to the injury, the defeaning silence from the people around us at that time created awkwardness to what was already a heavy moment. It was the longest moment of my life. I tried so hard to maintain my composure. I succeeded at putting up a poker face, but I couldn't care less if my aunts noticed the pain I was feeling. That was the most that I could muster to do.

Deep inside, I know I had lost her. The old woman who was so loving and caring had surrendered to Alzheimer's disease. She was replaced by a stranger who was her exact opposite.

She was my maternal grandmother, whom we fondly call Nanang. She was the one who raised me from the time Nanay left for abroad when I was around five years old. (Nanay still works abroad, so up until before I got married, I have been under the care of Nanang.)

She was a very loving woman. All my cousins would agree on that, as each of us had been showered by her affection every chance we got. When my Mamang would play strict on any of my cousins, Nanang would always come to the rescue. I remembered her reasoning out to Mamang one time I asked permission to attend a party, her words were so vividly etched in my mind, "Iba na ang kabataan ngayon, kung hindi ka sasabay sa kanila, maiiwanan ka ng panahon!" Off to a party I went that night!

She attended to all my needs - preparing for school when I was little, trying to understand the rebellious highschool student that I turned out to be, patiently waiting for weekends that I would come home from Manila when I was in college, feeling really proud of coming up to the stage when I finished lawshool. She was proud of my achievements, but I had never heard her boast it off to other people. She did not finish her elementary, but she was so good in math and could carry a good conversation in English. She was one of the prayer leaders in our small barrio, she was the epitomy of humility and faith. Not to mention, very pretty. She was close to perfect, if you ask me.

When I passed the bar and became a lawyer, she cried tons of tears. For her, it was the culmination of the struggle that we had to go through to get a chance at a better life. Perhaps, that was the last moment she felt proud of me. After that, she was slowly being taken away from us. She was becoming a little forgetful at the beginning, until Alzheimer's hit her full blast. After that, she was never the same.

When I got married and when I gave birth, she was there but not really. It was already the stranger in her, masked by her tired physical features who repeatedly ask me who I was and whose baby I carried in my arms. It was painful to see the person you loved so much slowly deteriorate. It was difficult not to let her words get into you. Seeing her absorbed in her own anger when she used to have so much love to give left me in despair. Realizing that she may never go back to her old self shattered my heart into tiny little pieces.

I remember the first few days when I started my own family. I faced the confusion and guilt of feeling that I abandoned the family that raised me. How do you manage to start your own without necessarily leaving your old family behind? I guess it was inevitable. We moved on - probably some step up, some step away, or some step behind. But in all of that, there had to be a "moving on".

These days, aside from constantly checking on Nanang on the phone, I see to it that I visit her once a month. Every time I arrive, she would think of me as some stranger whom she hated. But whenever it's time to leave, she would always cry because she will again be left behind. Every step away is a heartache. And this much I know, even if I have moved on, my heart remains with the woman who raised me. There is no way in hell that is gonna change.

Nanang, I miss the "real" you.. Thank you for raising me. I am forever grateful.
Advance Happy Mother's Day!

I value this photo so much because it was one of the
rare times that Nanang recognized Zohan as my son.

The wars inside me

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 23:31:00 +0000

Photo source

I have wars inside me. We all do, I think. For my part, I had been embroiled in endless battles with Insecurity, Obssessive-Compulsiveness and Selfishness these past few months. Luckily, my sword has proven to be sharp and my armor impenetrable.

But as luck would have it, Insecurity has recently turned into a tough foe. Her photos of wonderfully-kept homes and stories of wives whipping out good food from cookbook as if they have trained under Martha Stewart have awakened the green-eyed monster within me. During my brief times of contentment, she has forced me to dream of the exquisite things that I unfortunately do not have and the awe-inspiring skills that I can never acquire. She made me throw my armor...

Obsessive-Compulsiveness has likewise joined the party. Her subtle reminders about my son's irregular eating schedules and his unusual sleeping patterns have awakened the control freak within me. During my brief time of rest, she exhorts me to jog, blog, clean, and act out every action words she can possibly think of-- all at the same time! She made me throw my sword...

To make matters worse, Selfishness has slowly crept into the picture. Her constant nags about the things I cannot afford to buy or do and the scenic places I cannot visit have awakened the egocentric toddler within me. During my brief times of selflessness, she asks me, When are you going to buy and do all these things?; when are you going to visit these places?; are you waiting for the time when your pockets have the money but your body lacks the will and the energy? Needless to say, without my armor and sword, I am nothing but a helpless prey ripe for the pouncing.

These three demons, endowed with the energy of a hyperactive kid and the persistence of a telemarketer, rob me of my precious time with the Universe, my family, and my self. They act swiftly and stealthily like a thief in the night. They know the rules of the game, as I do too. But unlike me, they can bend the rules to their own liking.

This has been my daily struggle, my constant strife.

But today, the demons have subsided, at least for a while. I can now hear my little boy's squeals and giggles from his father's play pretend – because there is a comforting silence inside me. I can now see the wonderful things sitting in our cozy little space – because my eyes are no longer fixated at a distant sala of another family's beautiful home. I can now feel the marvelous moment of doing nothing but roll in our messy floor with my boys, while I'm in my pajamas, hair unkempt and face devoid of artificial color – because I have stripped down my anxiety, vanity, and obsession with being in control. The demons have subsided, and I am having a quiet time with my small family on a scorching Sunday afternoon.

It just dawned on me that when I mull over these demons, their strength seems to inrease tenfold. On the other hand, if I let loose a little and take baby steps, these demons tend to forget their reason for fighting and they fade slowly. By letting loose I speak of that moment when I choose to carry my son til he doze off instead of handing him over to his father so that I can start picking up the toys scattered on the floor; that moment when I refuse to think about my to-do list and really listen to the husband when he talks passionately about Ginebra qualifying for the semi-finals; that moment when I look at my clothes in the closet and accept that there is no urgency in buying a new one; that moment when I silently pray at times of confusion, anger, and neglect, instead of thinking about my next argument. During those moments, the demons become nothing but blurs. My restless heart becomes still. My bruised soul becomes healed. I can see my husband smiling. I can see through my son's eyes. I can hear the Universal language of love.

I wish days like these are longer than the days when I have raging wars inside me. To make that happen, I have to be a little less self-absorbed and a little more loving. I have a lot of working on to do. But knowing that in this war, baby steps are actually giant steps in disguise, I am relieved.

I do not win the war all the time. In fact, I am just slowly learning the ropes of the game. But with baby steps, now I stand a chance.

Enjoying the long weekend by not being myself

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 08:55:00 +0000

Photo Source

Lately, I've been stressed out. A lot. My mind is overflowing with so many unnecessary and inconsequential thoughts while my face is slowly becoming a nesting place for pimples. As a consequence, my words of late are somewhere along the lines of: "You don't love me as much anymore, husband."; "We don't have this and that. When are we going to afford that darn refrigerator?"; "I don't even have the time or money for a decent haircut, demmit!"; "We need to visit the new pedia because I'm feeding my son foods prescribed by google!"; "Why is he always crying these days? Shit, I've raised a spoiled brat!" Well, you get the drift. The long and short of it is - I am having a really hard time adjusting to mommyhood and wifeyhood.

As most marriages go, I usually turn to my better half for relief. Invariably, the husband's words save me from further over-analysis. And feminists forgive me, but I always end up wishing I was a man with no drama-stimulating hormones. Most days though, I am too stubborn to talk and I keep everything to myself. Unfortunately, because of my taciturnity, I transform into the moody and volatile version of myself (and gosh, the pimples!). Needless to state, I have never been put to so much stress in my life, I feel as if I'm taking the bar exams all over again! (Except that this has dragged on for more than four Sundays, and there's no good food and a nice hotel!)

So this long weekend, I will try to emulate my husband and his notorious equanimity, even for just five days. I will cook his requested pasta with sausage without stressing over the grocery bills. I will directly breastfeed my son without thinking of the stored milks at the refrigerator that are about to expire. I will watch DVDs with the husband without drifting my thoughts to the weekend mall sales. I will fold the clothes, arrange the toys, and clean the house not out of duty but out of love.

And yeah, if painful thoughts come rushing to me again, I will opt to believe the husband 's words when he says, "It's okay. This is perfectly normal. We are just at the adjustment stage.." instead of my own version of facts that are likely to generate female anxiety.

I will try not to be myself this long weekend. I will really live the moment, and I promise not to think about the hectic week ahead. I will tend to my son without assessing his growth and development inside my head. I will laugh with the husband like I used to, when we were still silly law students who don't give a care in the world. And I will appreciate myself more, give her a nod and tell her it's okay, you're doing fine..

Carpe diem, mommies! Enjoy the long weekend we rightfully deserve!

Five W's and One H of Expressing Milk at the Workplace

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 03 Apr 2012 01:27:00 +0000

100% Breastfed onesie from St. Patrick's infant line, gifted by Dad and his sweet kids

For the past seven months, Zohan has been 99% exclusively breastfed. Roughly, such percentage is equivalent to five months of expressing milk at the office; thousands of pesos worth of storage milk bags; 20 ounces of spilled milk due to spoilage/too much rushing; 10 pieces of discarded papers after spilling milk on them; 765 cuss words uttered every time I spilled milk on something that always happened to be important; and 100% stress-level for this working mama. On a good note, however, it also means 100% nutrition for the baby!

It isn't a walk in the park. To be honest, I have entertained thoughts of discontinuing breastfeeding my son because of the all the hassles that I have to go through. Perhaps, the only respite I have is when I breastfeed at home where I could just whip out my boobie and let the feeding frenzy begin. But unfortunately, I have a job that can be overly demanding at times, and more often than not, gets in the way of my breastfeeding. (or vice versa).

But I have carried on. Let me tell you why, where, what, who, when, and how.

1.) WHY?

..because I have no choice. I want to breastfeed him, but I have a job that I can't give up. I can't bring him along to the office everyday, so I have to express milk at the workplace. I guess the bigger question is, why do I breastfeed? I know the internet/your pediatrician/your friends are bursting with all the right reasons why every mother should at the very least try to breastfeed. And I won't bother to repeat them because for sure, they know better than I do. I have my personal reasons why I do, apart from all that nutritional stuffs. And that is - breastfeeding makes me feel closer to my son.

I can't make Zohan laugh and giggle as much as the husband. I get impatient and tired emitting all those sounds that make him laugh. But after they play, the little boy would run to me (okay, not run) to nurse, and when he's latched on my bossom, time and space disappear so suddenly. I would give this really proud, high-chin look to the husband, as if to say, Okay, your time's up mister. My turn to be loved. Sometimes, I say that out loud. Oftentimes, a bitcher version of that.

2. WHERE?

Where do I pump?

One of the things that make it really convenient for me is the fact that I have a room in the office all to myself. I just lock it up when it's time to express milk, and my secretary already knows the default response when somebody knocks at my door: nagpapump po.

Where do I store?

Thank God for the home-y feel of our office, it is not uncomfortable for me to store my expressed milk at the refrigerator. In fact, my officemates are amazed at how much I could collect in a day. (When Zohan was still with my in-laws, I had a week's supply of breastmilk stored in our office refrigerator. Every Friday was inventory time! I would put all my milk in a big cooler full of ice packs, ready for the travel home.) But now that Zohan is here with us in Makati, I only store the day's collection in the refrigerator. At the end of the day, I just put the expressed milk in my Avent's insulated bag.

3. WHAT?

What are the essentials? Please bear with me because there are a lot. Below is the photo of the bag that I carry with me wherever I go - to a court hearing, to a government office, to the office - every.single.day.

Let's do a bag raid:

I carry this bag to the office everyday!

INSIDE THE BAG:

Light brown small bag for the pumping kit, Avent insulated bag for the Avent Via collection cups,

Cloth bag for the milk-collecting bottle, and adaptor for the electric pumping kit

Photo source

Of course, one has to have a reliable pump. I made a simple review of the pumps that I have tried before coming up with the one that works best for me. You can read about it here. But if you don't have the time and patience, I will say it anyway. I swear by Ameda Purely Yours Double Electric Pump. A little pricey, but definitely worth it.

For storage, I previously used disposable milkbags because I had to store a week's collection of milk. I have tried Ainon and Precious Moments, which are commercially sold at the mall. I also tried Spectra, which I ordered online from babymama.ph. I must say, all of them are good to use, but I like Ainon best - it's sturdy and spacious enough to store large quantities of milk. But now, since I can bring home the expressed milk everyday, I don't need too many storage bags. I'm using Avent Via cups, which I can wash and use over and over again. Pretty neat!

Photo Source

Since travel time from work to home is not as awful as it used to be, I've done away with ice packs and coolers, in exchange for my awesome Avent insulated bag. Thank you Nanay for the insulated bag!

4. WHO?

I realized when I was already writing this up that the Who question is a little out of sync in this topic. But if I think hard and deep, I would have to admit that the bigger person who deserves the "who" spot is the husband. So let's give him his 5-second-fame because really, it would be so much difficult without someone who would drop the pump bag to my office when I need to go straight to a hearing first; bring home my expressed milk when I need to stay overtime at the office; carry the pump bag when we walk home most weekdays; and be just a staunch ally in this endeavor that I embarked on. Thank you! Your time's up!

5. WHEN?

I express milk first thing in the morning (or before I leave the house if I wake up early) before starting with work because a lot of of a lawyer's deskwork require "in-the-zone" moments. That way, I do not get interrupted by my pumping schedule the moment that I am already basked in my combative mood. After I have completed a substantial amount of work in the morning, I'm off to lunch. I do not have the luxury of time to overstay at the coffee room for chika with my officemates, because I have some milk-expressing to do. So after taking my lunch, I head back to my room again and set-up my paraphernalia. The next milk-expressing schedule would be after merienda, and the last for the day would be before going home. I try to express milk at least 3 to 5 times a day in the office. My schedule is actually a little counter-productive, but it is the most practical timing that I can come up with.

6. HOW?

Of course, I don't need to tell you how I express milk. (No mental image please.We're dealing with the sustenance of a child here, for Christ's sake!) But how do I manage to do it? Here are a few tips:

1. Dedication. Self-explanatory. If you do not set your heart and mind to it, laziness could really win you over.

2. Do not think of formula - or else, one will have the tendency to miss out a pumping schedule since there's something to supplement anyway. If you are doing it, might as well give your all. No retreat, no surrender!

3. Think of the benefits - and you will most likely agree that it far outweighs the disadvantages. For that alone, I get renewed strength to stop what I'm doing and set-up my pumping gears.

4. Be proud of what you do - When you are giving your baby the best food there is, what is there not to be proud of?

I knew that a lot of times I looked like a tired and stressed mother heavily laden by my pumping bag walking around aimlessly under the scorching heat of the sun. Those days I wished that I need not bring all those things with me (We hardly bring our car to work, that's why I always look like an eloping teenage girl with all the bags I carry every day.)

I knew that a lot of times the pleading that I was drafting had to be filed that same day and I could use every freaking hour to finish it. Those days I wished I need not spare extra time to express milk.

I knew a lot of times I could really use a good conversation with friends from the office - to rant or to ask about their cases or to just blabber nonsense and laugh out loud. Those days I wished I could stay longer for lunch instead of heading straight to my room after chewing on my last morsel of meat.

But I also knew that I was doing everything for my son, so I had to carry on. After all, he would only need my sacrifice for a year or so, not for a lifetime. And I could never get these days back once I let them slipped by. So yes, I express milk at the office. And I'm extremely proud of it.

On being a mom-blogger

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 12:06:00 +0000

“This is an official entry to Dainty Mom’s Bloggy Goodies Contest, in celebration of the Dainty Mom blog’s 2nd anniversary.”

I only wanted to earn extra money - that is the plain, awful truth why I started blogging last year. But instead of ending up richer 34 posts thereafter, I am still stuck in the same financial position when I started. Oddly enough, I gained something intangible which, to me, was far more meaningful. I am a mother who tried to write. And this is my story.

I was a relatively new professional who's been jumping from one firm to another in quest for my chosen field. After a series of misfits, I finally tied myself to a medium-sized firm, with high hopes of having found my niche and working my way up the corporate ladder. Little by little, I started buying nice things for myself, dining out in fancy restaurants every once in a while, helping out my family financially, trying my luck in investments, developing a career in the academe. I was having a blast. I was starting to live the life.

Then I got pregnant.

When the ominous two lines appeared, it was a jungle of emotions. First was utter disbelief. (How could we have missed that?!) But after three pregnancy kits which all gave me positive results, I summoned myself it's time to believe what was happening. Then, excitement came rushing in. The idea of holding a little sweetheart in my hands overwhelmed me. The dreams of starting a family with my "incredible absorbing man" awed me. The thought of so many kids running around the house ignited a profound excitement. It was euphoric.

The nine months of uneventful pregnancy went like a breeze. When my son finally arrived, I thought to myself, this is it. The long wait was over. But the excitement went down the drain with the realization that it was more than just a change in status from single to married to mother (not necessarily in that order). There was no way to sugarcoat it. Motherhood meant responsibility - financially and emotionally.

Suddenly, I was back to square one because I was put to an entirely different world where I was not in control. I was afraid because there was no way to check if I was doing things right. The frivolous life that I was just beginning to embark on was put to a halt. I had to close my eyes to nonsensical things and focus instead on Huggies and Johnson's Baby products. I was emotional and tired. I was broke and clueless.

That was when I started browsing motherhood blogs. Realizing that experience is the best teacher, I turned to motherhood blogs for help. Where to buy, what to use, when to stop, all my nagging questions were addressed by mommyblogs. In the process, I also discovered that one can actually earn real money from blogging. (Yes, it took me 28 years to know that.) I was stunned at the freebies that came pouring down their doorsteps. I was giddy at the shopping money they earned just by writing down their thoughts and publishing it in the internet. But more than the tips and the encouragement of these bounteous mom-bloggers, and the misconception of easy money in blogging, there was something in the blogosphere which kept me drawn to it.

You see, somewhere in my dark, distant past, I had a very humble background in amateur writing. I used to write for the school paper in high school, and for a short while, I did a few articles in the college paper. But, at one point or another, I kind of got convinced that I really did not have what it takes to be a writer, so I ditched the idea. But every time I read blogs which were so nicely written, there was a tiny spark of interest and envy that crept up to me. I would be amazed at how these writers could concoct words that convey so much emotions. I would repeatedly read lines that were spot on. I would bookmark blogs with the wittiest thoughts and the most moving words. I would look up to the profiles of these writers with so much respect and admiration.

And so from their inspiration, Legallymama was born.

Now, almost half a year of blogging, with 34 published posts, thank God for my total earnings of...surprise, surprise! One Hundred Ten Pesos! Yes, it was far more difficult than I thought. Extra money wouldn't come easy, it would require marketing and hardwork, and I haven't gotten my way around it. But more than the money, blogging gave me something more meaningful - it brought my passion back. I became interested to write again. Well, there were still a lot of grammar lapses, scattered thoughts, silly posts with heavy pictures, shameless articles directed to gain sponsors - but who cares. There were a few articles that were close to my heart, those that I have poured my soul into, those given praises by my personal editor/husband, those which chronicled how motherhood has changed me from a spoiled selfish brat to a more compassionate and patient person. Those are the bigger reasons why I continue to keep this blog. And one day, those articles will be read by my son. And he will be proud because he paved the way for me to re-discover writing. Likewise, he will realize that he is a living proof of the old adage that it takes a village to raise a child. In his case, a village of mothers trying to survive the day by writing their hearts out.

Mad about fruits

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 18 Mar 2012 09:32:00 +0000

It's been a month since I started this series of adventure (mostly misadventures, actually!) on Zohan's solid food intake. Since then, he's been on cereals and vegetables. And now, he's moving up to fruits!

Here's a rundown of what he's had thus far:

PEARS

"Pears are high in fiber, potassium and Vitamin C. High in fiber, Pears like other fruits, are great aids in reducing the risks of cancer and heart attack and sustaining healthy cholesterol levels. They are also a great fruit to offer as a remedy to help alleviate baby's constipation."

He enjoyed pears! Look at that face!

APPLES

"One of the most important nutritional components of Apples is that they contain two types of fiber; insoluble fiber and soluble fiber. Both the insoluble fiber in apples and their soluble fiber pectin, help maintain bowel regularity (thus helping to prevent diverticulosis and colon cancer). The insoluble fiber works like roughage, while the soluble fiber (pectin), helps keep the bowels regular (avoiding constipation, avoiding diarrhea) and specifically affects the makeup of the stool. Pectin will firm up the stool as it is a soluble fiber."


Apples were A-okay, too!

AVOCADO

"Avocados are often called one of nature's perfect foods because they are said to contain everything a person needs to survive. A wonderful "good fat" food for baby's brain and physical development, try an avocado as baby's first food instead of refined cereals."

After looking for avocados in different grocery stores, I finally chanced upon them in the produce section of Robinson's Place Ermita the other day. I hoarded for Zohan and for the entire household. (I figured since it's summer, it would be refreshing to have a thick avocado shake at home!)

It's his first green food and Zohan was a little hesitant to taste it.

Nanay, what is this experiment again?

But after a moment of what I thought was a thorough inspection, the little boy caved in!

BANANAS

"Bananas are an excellent source of nutrition and as such, are another perfect fruit to be one of baby's first foods.Bananas are often called one of nature's perfect foods because they are said to contain many of the nutrients that a person needs to survive. One of the most important nutritional components of Bananas is that they contain potassium and fiber. Bananas are also high in Vitamin B6, Vitamin C and Vitamin B2."

This was not the first time that Zohan was given bananas. You can read about his first encounter with it here. And if only his vocabulary was vast enough, I think he would have used the word "abhor" to describe his feelings towards it!

Here he is, trying to decipher that familiar taste he once hated..

After realizing it was banana, he gave me that face again!

Right now, I've been alternating fruits, vegetables and cereals in his daily menu. So far, his favorite is sweet potatoes, and his hatest is, obviously, banana. After a series of hit and miss, we're finally down the happy road! And since I have made so much fuss and and have written far too many posts over just solid food, it's about time to end this series. It's been a little rough for this first-time mama. But hey, who said motherhood is a walk in the park? It was a little bumpy, sure. But little Zohan's definitely making the ride all worth it.

To read about his entire solid food experience, here are the links:

Eating solids for the first time

Second take on solid food (Trying out cereals)

Trying out real food after Cereals (Going Bananas)

Trying out squash for the first time (Smashing Pumpkin)

Trying out vegetables (Finally a happy photo!)

*Information enclosed in quotation marks were taken from here.

A visitor in my office

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 08:27:00 +0000

Every quarter, our law office schedules a "housekeeping day". It's held on a Saturday, when lawyers and secretaries come to the office to file all documents and papers in their respective folders. From an outsider's point of view, such task will appear to be something that can be done during ordinary workdays. But believe me, in a typical day in a busy lawfirm, the pile of documents in one's incoming tray could reach knee-high because the latest incoming work is invariably more important and more urgent than the previous ones that just arrived. As such, the filing of papers in their case folders is always last in priority.

Housekeeping days are scheduled on a weekend -- free food, casual outfit, no time-in. There is only one caveat at the announcement board- to please leave your children at your house. And for good reason. It is the only day when we have no choice but to file all our papers and documents after failing to do the same for three months. Needless to say, bringing a kid to work will definitely take its toll on the task at hand.

I was okay with the the "no-to-bringing-kids" rule during my pre-baby time, so to speak. I mean, I really come to the office on housekeeping days to do just that - organize my three-month worth of accumulated trash. I'd come in almost lunch time because I need to do more important stuffs at home first, like catch up on my sleep or spend two ecstatic hours of peace and quiet just staring blankly at the walls. Once at the office, I'd have lunch with the rest of my officemates, make some chika in between, and then do my housekeeping duties. By around 4pm, it's time to go home or to the mall or to wherever.

Last Saturday, our family was scheduled to go home to my province. It was also our Housekeeping Day. Things were different this time. I suddenly realized the need for a strict compliance with the reminder to leave the kids at home. Weekends are days for the family, and there will always be a strong urge to bring the kids to the office while doing office duties. For as long as I can recall, there were always kids, or sometimes babies, gracing the office activity despite the reminders of the big bosses.

So who am I to break the tradition? To be fair though, I went to the office at around 7am, even earlier than my usual work schedule on weekdays. By 10am, I was already done with my housekeeping! And what other lovely way to end it than to be fetched by my "little boss"?

Nanay, is this your keyboard?

I want to try it!

So, who's the boss now?

After a few proud-mama-moments of showing the little guy around, off we went to my province.

Certainly, there will be days when office work can be demanding. When that happens, I put myself in the shoes of my bosses and assess if a particular rule is really necessary. And for the most parts, it is. So while I try to comply, I still need to make sure that weekends are days for the family as much as possible. I have already dedicated five days of my week to attend to my work, so it is just fair that I try to dedicate the remaining two days to my loved ones. In cases like these, adjustments have to be made to make sure that those precious time with the husband and my son are unscathed - even if it means that I have to drag my lazy ass off my bed earlier than usual! Zzzzz!

Finally, a happy photo!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 06 Mar 2012 23:55:00 +0000

I told you about our struggle to get Zohan eat his first solid food. The first solid food ever introduced to him was Cerelac wheat, but allergies soon developed which compelled me to wait for one month before re-introducing the same.

After one month, we tried Earth's Best Brown Rice Cereal and fortunately, everything went well. For one whole week, Zohan had been on cereal and it was all smooth. You can read about it here and here.

When it was time to move on from cereal to more "real" food, it became bumpy again. I attempted to introduce bananas by mashing the fruit and mixing it with a few drops of breastmilk. But Zohan made it so clear that he's not into bananas. The pictures spoke rather clearly in this post.

I figured maybe banana was a bit cold for a first fruit. I could hear my folks back home nagging me that banana is "malamig sa tyan at nakakasikmura", so I tried squash instead. But then, it didn't pass the standard of the little boy. I was beginning to think I suck at this motherhood thing. And Zohan seemed to agree with me. Just take a look at him here and you'll probably agree, too.

After a lot of make-face, heavy sigh and frustrated rantings to the husband, I considered jarred food. I just thought-- since it's prepared by the experts, a lot of study had been undertaken to produce a consistent, tasty, and nutritious jarred food for babies starting on solids. So I gave in.

Ninang Joyce and I trooped to Healthy Options and I got me three of their first food line - first squash, first carrots and first sweet potatoes.

But since I really intended to feed him natural foods - which were a lot cheaper - we dropped by the supermarket and bought five small pieces of carrots, a small cut of squash and three pieces of sweet potatoes - all that for P50. The jarred foods were priced at P45 EACH so I paid a total of P135, as against the P50 I incurred for those real veggies! See how cheaper natural foods are? Once his taste buds have adjusted well to foods with taste, then we can go natural all the way.

Well, my P45 paid off because Zohan, thank God, finally ate his first squash jarred food! I would have wanted to document it by taking photos, but there was no sufficient time for picture taking because I still had to work. For the entire week, his menu looked like this:

first jar of squash c/o Earth's Best
real squash - boiled, mashed
first jar of carrots c/o Earth's Best
real carrots - boiled and mashed
first jar of sweet potatoes c/o Earth's Best
real sweet potatoes - boiled and mashed and mixed with a little hot water

This weekend, it's real carrots - and look, finally here are a much calmer and happier photos!

I am just so proud, and relieved, and assured that I'm doing things right!

Now that we're past the stressful part, feeding time has become an exciting part of the day for me. And for Zohan, too!

Next week, it's all about fruits. What fruits did you first give your babies? Zohan and I would like to know! =)

Baby's Day Out

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 13:58:00 +0000

Baby's first day out! It took six months before the husband and I felt really comfortable with taking Zohan out to the big world. There were some instances that we had to bring him along, like a lunch out at Tagaytay because it's on the way home to my province, or to a mall in the North because we had to stop and take out food, but those days didn't really count.

Last Sunday was the official day out for Zohan.

And what better way to introduce him to the world outside the corners of our home than to bring him to... the mall? I wished! ...the zoo? Maybe soon! ...the park? That's in the list. We brought him here...

Photo Source

The National Museum! O dba, cultured lang ang peg! It was actually the husband's idea, and since I would appreciate going out even just to go to Luneta Park, I was happy when he brought up the idea. At the back of my mind, I was screaming What the heck are we going to do at the National Museum?! Then I realized, that's near Robinson's Place, where we could have lunch. Hmm. Kay. Lezzgo.

I was grasping for words to explain our experience at the National Museum. I was literally lost for words because it only meant to me that we got to take the little boy out. But the husband - oh my bizarre husband. His eyes were sparkling with wonder and amazement the whole time. It just affirmed my theory that he was an ancient person trapped in the body of a modern man. (He appreciates history and philosophy, and while I would love for him to impart those passion to our son, I guess Zohan is just too young to appreciate these things.) So we both agreed to come back when he's older and curious enough to appreciate history.

Meanwhile, I will just share with you our photostory. I guess the pictures would make a better story teller than I would.

Let me tell you Zohan's fascination with a mythical character from Lanao del Sur named Borak. Borak is a figure with the body of a horse and a human head. When we passed by him, Zohan was swept away. He didn't remove his eyes from the statue.

Three floors of galleries after, the little boy was already getting bored from being trapped in his stroller. Tatay had to carry him for the next two floors, but the problem was, he was grabbing everything within his reach! And you know how important that all things displayed remain unbroken and unblemished so I held my breath the entire time.

The sole gallery that sparked interest in me was the Philippine Arts Awards. They displayed the entries to the award, and for an instant, I wished I inculcated arts in my boring self.

The artist weaved threads to depict his biography

I call this... The Lazy Song

The husband said the explanation of the artist for this canvass was very meaningful. I read it over and over but I don't think I get it. Remind me to ask him tonight what exactly the artist meant with drowning.

After the final floor of galleries, it's time for my favorite part. Lunch at Robinson's Place.

It looked like he enjoyed his day out! With this kind of smile, we can't help but think of Museong Pambata next.

The National Musem is located at P. Burgos St., Manila, Philippines. Entrance fee is P100 for adults and P30 for students. FREE entrance during Sundays. Visit their site for more information - http://www.nationalmuseum.gov.ph/nationalmuseumbeta/Visit/Visit.html

We got featured!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sat, 03 Mar 2012 10:55:00 +0000

Hold your horses before you jump into conclusions. No, we are a sure far cry from those "mommy-baby" features in glossy magazines. But nonetheless, I am so ecstatic that Zohan and an article which I wrote both got featured last February.

When I first started blogging, I was overwhelmed with the many clubs and and sites that one could sign up to. One of the sites which caught my eye was momcenter, an online community of mommies and a repository of all mom-information. True to it's name, it's everything for every mom. Last week, I received an email from Arbee Panga, the Interactive Marketing Coordinator of momcenter in the Philippines, telling me that an article which I wrote in my blog was chosen to be featured in their Resource Center. The article was Working Mom Guilt, which you can read here.

I was supposed to be happy and all that jazz. But then... You know that queasy feeling when you bump into your ex and your hair's a disaster? Or when you were seen by the ex of your boyfriend/husband and you're cussing yourself deep within because before leaving home, you did not choose your flattering dress and opted instead to wear a sloppy ensemble, put together with your unkempt hair and a pale face? That's exactly what I felt about this feature: Zohan's clothes were uncoordinated, my writing was not my best, the photo was taken by a camera phone, and all those frivolous things. Don't get me wrong though. I am grateful to momcenter for the feature. It's just that I have been consciously working to improve my writing - I just hoped they waited for it to happen before they did the feature. haha. Probably in the next twenty years. Or so.

Now, to happier news!

One of the momblogs that I have been following is mommyfleur. Deviating from most mommy blogs which provide endless tips on how to become a better mom, mommyfleur provides a comic relief to those who just want motherhood to be one happy stride. Fleur is the uber witty and kikay writer behind the blog. She is an epitomy of a genuine and jovial mother- sees the good in everything and chooses to tread the happy road.

She believed that Filipino kids are just so adorable and fashionably fierce. So she thought of having a weekly feature of cute kids in her blog portion, This Kid is it!, which, to me, translates loosely to our beki jargon as "Ikaw na!". Or something like that. Last Tuesday, look whose kid is it. Yes people, it's my kid! You can see the feature here. Head on over to mommy Fleur and see the "Houston, we have a problem" look of our adorable darling.

Thank you momcenter and Fleur. You made one silly mama very happy!

Half-Year Drama

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 28 Feb 2012 09:18:00 +0000

I was cleaning up the mess in our room one night when I was suddenly stunned at the sight of two pairs of shoes carelessly strewn about the frame of our bed. At six months, both of them had been outgrown by the little boy.

And so I wondered, where had all those six months been? I could barely recall everything about those months. Well, there were a few episodes of infant acne, blocked tear ducts, colic bouts, (I do remember colic bouts very vividly!) cradle cap, and baracuda baby sucking, but that's about it. Details of everyday of those six months seemed like just a figment of a very distant past.

It hasn't been a year but so much has been happening in our lives that it feels like if I blink, I may not be able to recall what just happened last week.

That's why amidst all the chaos, I would like to take time and try to write down what is in the "now." It feels a little symbolic because Zohan is half a year already. Add a few years to that, I might not be able to recount to him the beauty of this day. So I hope that one day, he could just go over this post and smile or smirk with matching WTH, whichever suits him.

At six months, you are already a character. You are a very happy baby. You would instantly smile the moment we open the front door coming from the office. We have put together 7,524 ways to create a syllable from the alphabet during our playtime, and we mostly get rewarded from sounding and looking silly with your chuckles and laughters.

You can be a little dramatic, though. If you see no one around, you will instantly cry. Even if I'm just turning my back to get a new diaper or to turn on the fan, you always interpret such actions to mean that I'm leaving you alone. And you will cry. In a nanosecond, I will get back to you and then you will smile so sweetly. And you always melt my heart with that.

At night, you prefer to be breasfed while I hold you as I rest my back on the headboard of our bed. You sleep more easily that way, rather than lying directly on the bed while being breastfed on my side. You still wake up at night. Yes, you're not yet sleeping through the night. Tatay and I have been experimenting by letting you cry out for a while until you doze off again. But as luck would have it, you invariably elevate your whimpers to full blown crying bouts. So Tatay would give in and urge me to breastfeed you so you can go back to sleep. And indeed, you will go back to sleep instantly, as if you just needed to know that I am there and you are not alone.

You are a pretty healthy baby. Your last six months had been uneventful, save for a few cough and colds which had been miraculously cured by breastmilk alone. And just so you know, Tatay and I have gone the extra mile to attend all hearings and fieldworks that our body can tolerate to eke out some extra transportation allowance for your monthly vaccines. Thank god the vaccines seem to work.

You can already crawl. You toss and turn a lot. And you occupy half of our bed every night. You can sit pretty steady without support. You can utter a few syllables. Your first was "ba-ba". And we have heard several combinations of those a's and b's since. (And some other letters,too!)

You don't poo-poo everyday. And you cry everytime you do, which makes me worry a little. I shall ask your new pediatrician about it, except that I'm still searching for him/her these days. You are never sensitive with wet diapers. You don't usually cry even if your diapers are soiled. But when the temperature gets just a little bit hot, your temper invariably does the same. You sweat a lot, but only in your head and nape.

You giggle and laugh a lot when your Tatay plays with you. I don't get that same happiness from you no matter how much I try to look and sound silly with all those coos and caas and whatnots. But that's okay. My bonding time with you is when I breastfeed. That time is ours and ours alone. When you are latched in my bosom, time and space seem to disappear. I could just stare at you and feel how much close you are to me. I notice every tiny detail of your face. I drift and imagine every tiny detail of my dreams for you. Sometimes , sore/cracked nipples sabotage this sublime experience. I push on through despite the pain but forgive me because when it all gets too painful, I sometimes cuss.

I try to take as much pictures of you as I can. I used to be a camwhore, but of the 300 plus pictures on my phone, there's not a single photo of me. All of them are your pictures from the time you were born, until the latest which tatay took yesterday while I was taking a shower.

While I was in the shower, somebody's messing up with my clothes!

But don't worry, you can never find a picture of your face mercilessly placed beside a huge monthly birthday cake. We made sure there are no such photos. Oh, and I'm sorry but there were no cakes either.

You are so much loved by the people around you - our family and friends. But most specially by your Nanay and Tatay. In a world of changes, our love for you would always remain constant; I can promise you that.

Zohan at six months

Let this be a memento of your first six months. Just refer to this post when I can't seem to answer your queries many years from now.

Now, back to cleaning the house.

Smashing Pumpkin

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 26 Feb 2012 06:59:00 +0000

Okay, it's really squash and not pumpkin, but I just thought Smashing Pumpkin is a catchy title.

Yesterday, I told you about my failed attempt to introduce banana to Zohan. Today, we boiled a small portion of squash and mashed it again with a few drops of breastmilk:

It looked like the photo of mashed banana I posted here, but believe me, it's not the same!

I was really hoping that this time, he would at least give the squash a chance. You see, last night, I attempted to introduce carrots, but I failed at the preparation stage so it didn't make the cut to be featured today. I wouldn't bother you with the details of the failed carrots because I sucked big time, and I'm depriving you of the chance to laugh at how ~~stupid~~ clueless I was.

Anyway, so off I go again to prepare the paraphernalia and the food, and with a hopeful heart and a rising impatience, I gave the boy his first taste of squash.

Well, guess what...

He's so sneaky and careful not to let even just a bit of that smashed squash be swallowed by him. He was even retching. Sneaky boy. And that left me one frustrated mama. :(

Hayyy. Why oh why do you not want to eat?

On a lighter note, look at that face. He looks so funny!

Going Bananas!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 06:57:00 +0000

It's Zohan's second week on solid foods, and as promised, I shall try to document the foods that we introduce to him for the first month in order to help other clueless mothers out there with what to give their babies.

I was actually thinking of potatoes for his vegetable requirement this second week. It's a good thing that I came across momtastic's wholesome babyfood site. I tell you, it's like a bottomless pit of information about everything you need to know about solid food for babies. It's got a chart of the proper foods for the different ages of babies, amazing recipes so that your babies won't get bored with their daily food, proper storage and handling of prepared foods, and a whole lot more. Here, I share with you the solid food chart for babies aged six to eight months.


Photo source

I searched for the nutritional contents of potatoes on the site, and I learned that, "[d]ue to their lower level of important nutrients and a high amount of starchy carbohydrates, it would best to keep white potatoes out of baby's diet until between 8-10 months of age." It pays to read up, right?

Another information that I learned from the site is that instead of waiting for an entire week before introducing another food, you can follow the "four-day-wait" rule instead. In fact, most pediatricians now suggest that instead of waiting for four days, "..babies may be introduced to a variety of foods, all at once, even during the first days of introducing solid foods. The thought is that offering a wider variety of tastes and textures, early and often, will get baby’s tastebuds excited and 'trained' to enjoy flavors of all types. Offering a larger variety sooner, such as serving 4 new foods during a 2 or 4 day span, rather than later may just give baby the willingness and curiosity to try anything and everything put in front of him." I think I am more inclined to the idea of wider variety of tastes and textures, since Tatay and I do not have a history of allergies anyway.

After ditching the potatoes idea, I voted on the squash for the vegetable requirement and bananas for the fruit requirement. I would have wanted avocado which is the recommended first food for babies, but since it's out of season, I think banana would be fine.

"Bananas are an excellent source of nutrition and as such, are another perfect fruit to be one of baby's first foods. Bananas are often called one of nature's perfect foods because they are said to contain many of the nutrients that a person needs to survive. One of the most important nutritional components of Bananas is that they contain potassium and fiber. Bananas are also high in Vitamin B6, Vitamin C and Vitamin B2."

For lunch, I mashed a banana and added a few drops of breastmilk:

Look at how eager he is to munch on those smashed bananas.

And as he gets closer to that first taste...

Awwww... wawa :( Apparently, he is not a big banana fan!

We didn't insist the banana to him for fear that he might be stressed out and associate eating to a harrowing experience. I had to switch back to his Earth's Best brown rice cereal for his lunch. Tomorrow, we shall try squash, and hopefully, I could share with you much happier photos!

UPDATE: To know what happened to the squash experiment, click here.

References:

Those enclosed in quotation marks are not my words. They were taken from this site.

Second Take on Solid Food

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 21 Feb 2012 14:39:00 +0000

I've said way too many times that Zohan has started on solids. It was probably because I spoke too much and too soon- the little boy had been on cerelac hiatus for a month because of allergies!

Soon after he started eating cerelac, he developed white mucus around the insides of his cheeks. Thinking it was just cerelac that wasn't washed away by water, I just used an index finger toothbrush to remove it. But as days went by, the white mucus increased and appeared to be more than just left-over solid foods. They looked like allergies to my untrained eyes, and the google-default mother that I was, I turned to the internet for confirmation. I didn't bother to see the doctor because you know, I really had misgivings in introducing solids to him prior to his 6th month, so I made my own prognosis and diagnosis (whatever that means!) - which was a little complicated and difficult to explain here because it was the product of my prolonged medical study. Suffice it to state, he was put on a cerelac hiatus by his all-knowing mother until the rashes were gone. True enough, (and this encouraged my newfound medical career), the white mucus were gone after we stopped giving him cerelac.

My conclusion - either we started too soon or we gave him the wrong food. His pediatrician said that any plain cerelac would do. So we trooped to SM and bought the wheat and milk flavor. But after the allergy breakout, I decided to catch up on my reading of What To Expect The First Year, and learned that the first food should be rice or oat. I thought wheat was fine but apparently, it wasn't. How dumb was I. (Now I know that despite the fact that they all came from the carbohydrates family, so to speak, wheat is not made of the same stuff that makes up rice and oat!) It was likewise possible that his system was not yet ready to accept solid food. His antibodies and allergy-fighting chorva might not be that developed as yet.

Hence, I had decided to wait it out until the 6th month before I re-introduce solids to Zohan.

And since Zohan apparently was not on friendly terms with Cerelac, I had decided to try this fancy, whimsical, P300-thereabout cereal from Earth's Best.

After a week though, I shall switch to an all-natural purees like potatoes and squash and that jazz. (I've read that it is best to wait for one week before introducing a new food to the baby. The reason being that, should the baby develops allergies, it would be easier to point out the culprit.) So, after a week of fancy eating, we would be back to regular programming.

It has been three days since we started with Earth's Best's brown rice, and so far, no allergies whatsoever intervened. Zohan appeared to be excited at the sight of his new food every time I bring out his plate and spoon. He also finishes his food every single time. In the next days until his first month, I will try to chronicle the foods that we give him. Let the same be my humble attempt to spare other clueless mothers like me from self-medicating and from typing - like I did - weird search parameters on google.

The first time we celebrated Valentine's Day

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Tue, 14 Feb 2012 08:01:00 +0000

Photo source

We are a couple who are not big on celebrations. In fact, we've been together for six years, and it was only last night that we did something out of the mundane, boring daily life that pass us by, in our attempt to give deference to St. Valentine. My husband is not a romantic person but I am good at compromises, so that would explain the lack of grandiose dinners and flamboyant gifts and flashy valentine's surprises. What made last night different from the five other valentine's day we have had was something that puzzles me this day. I am guessing, as first time parents saddled with sudden responsibility apart from our happy-go-lucky selves, we could really use a dinner out and well, a sappy movie.

So the night before valentine's day, the husband picked me up from work and drove amidst heavy downpour and horrendous traffic. We took advantage of those valentine's promo dinners with set menu and two free movie tickets in tow. Before the food arrived, we silly couple computed if we're getting our money's worth. After looking for the individual prices of the food in the menu set, adding it up with the price of the movie tickets, and realizing that we saved more than 500 pesos by getting the promo, the food suddenly looked so much more delicious when it arrived. Finally, we dined with appetizer and main course, and drinks and dessert! And I was a happy wife. That's a very welcome change from our usual no-need-to-whet-appetite, alin-ba-ang-good-for-two-main-course, tap-water-na-lang, mahal-mag-dessert type of dinners!

Finally, we had time for ourselves for silly and serious talks. And I realized that I missed these types of conversations:

Anent improving my blog:

W: Ano ba difference ng simile sa metaphor?

H: Pag simile gamit ka ng like, or similar to, para magcompare.

W: Katulad ng "like a sweet nectar to a bee"? Yung ginamit ko sa last article ko?

H: Oo.

W: Eh pano pag metaphor?

H: Walang like or similar to, pero nila-liken mo pa rin.

W: Huh? Example!

H: Her lips are the gates to Elysium.

W: Whoa! Lalim naman!

(Sorry, I was busy flirting in high school when these things were taught!)

Anent my joy of receiving a Tommy Hilfiger shoes:

W: Mahal ang bait ng secretary ko, binigyan nya ko kanina Tommy na shoes. Pasalubong ng sister nya from abroad, di naman daw nya ginagamit.

The husand, wide eyed and obviously very happy for me, blurted out..

H: Wow! Tommy Burch!

(I couldn't stop laughing! I should really stop messing my husband's head with all these brands.)

After dinner, we were arguing whether to use the movie tickets then or some other time. I was a bit worried that Zohan might be edgy and fussy having no breastfeeding to lull him to sleep. But the husband said, if we were to be out that night, we might as well do everything we could instead of being out again another time and going through the worries twice. Ain't he a sage?

So off we went to watch, guess what, "The Vow". Yeah yeah. It did look like that we're celebrating valentine's. And thanks to Channing Tatum and his masculine jaw, my mind was taken off from mothering, wife-ing and lawyering even just for two hours. At the end, the movie made me come to this realization - we are a doomed couple! Because if one of us ever get caught in a mishap and loose our memory, we could not prove to the other that we were really married. We had no video of our wedding day to begin with. The closest thing to a record of our vows were the photo captions I did on facebook. Our vows were such a joke compared to those lines they had that were too beautiful to be forgotten. And one of our wedding rings went missing (thanks to the husband) so showing just one ring would be self-serving. (I should make sure our seatbelts are both fastened from now on.)

So, how did our first valentine's day celebration fare? It's a good excuse to be a little lavish for a dinner. It's a good excuse for us to be out even for a while. But still, never a good excuse for flowers and chocolates and all that crap. Romantic people are definitely going to eat me alive!

Happy valentine's day you all! :) I hope you had fun celebrating it your way, your style. :)

Take it from the non-expert!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 08:59:00 +0000

"Welcome to the Milk Mama Diaries Carnival (February). For this month, we focus on back to basics. Participants will share advices - either the best breastfeeding advice they received OR/AND the best breastfeeding advice they can give to new moms. Please scroll down to the end of the post to see the list of carnival entries."

===============================================================

I'm pretty sure you have heard, and probably agree, that unsolicited pieces of advice are easy to give, but dreadful to take. Interestingly enough, giving birth and motherhood in our society attract as much unsolicited advise as a sweet nectar to a bee. Being a first-time mother - with looks of cluelessness silently screaming through my face almost all the time - I sure did take the part of an easy prey. Had the advice been helpful? Well, a few helped, but most of the time, some things were better heard in one ear and then swiftly slipped out the other the reason being that, motherhood is a wonderful world of individuality. Whatever works for you may not work for the others. And rather than insisting that other mothers out there take after what worked for me, let me share with you instead my experiences in breastfeeding- the challenges that I have met, how I successfully surmounted some of them, and how the rest has remained victorious over me. At the end, please be the judge. You see, I am not an expert. Far from it. I am just as helpless as most of you are. So you can either take it from me - a non-expert, or just let my blabber swiftly slip out. After all, some advice should be taken with a grain of salt, if not all.

1. When my milk supply was insufficient...

Like most first time breastfeeding mothers, I struggled with milk supply at the beginning. I was advised by the doctors from the hospital where I gave birth to supplement with formula milk until my breastmilk supply stabilized. Since I was so keen on breastfeeding, I tried to offer my breast to Zohan as often as I could. And I overdosed myself (and the whole household) with malunggay. Malunggay in the morning. Malunggay in the afternoon. Malunggay in the evening. Malunggay even in my dreams. There came a point that I could puke just at the sight of it, while the husband developed mammary glands complete with lactation with the overdose of malunggay. In less than a week, my breastmilk supply increased. Tremendously at that, I could feed an entire barangay.

The non-expert says... Malunggay overkill really works!

2. When my milk supply was too much...

We should really be careful with what we wish for. I hoped for a steady supply of breastmilk which was granted to the point of explosion. When Zohan was asleep, or did not want to nurse and I was lactating, I had to take in the pain of engorgement, and the shame of looking like two plates were plastered right in front of my shirt. Something had to be done. So I asked the husband to look for a trusty breastpump to alleviate the pain of engorgement and also, to prepare for my going back to work. The problem of choosing the best pump was so humongous for a post-partum depressed mother, it deserved a post of its own, which you can read here. But it all ended well. So when there's too much milk, go find a breast pump that you can call "the one".

The non-expert says...Go find a good pump, express milk, and store for future use.

3. When I went back to a demanding work...

After the maternity leave ended and I went back to work, my head spinned like crazy. Suddenly, I was at a loss at how I can cope with the new changes in my schedule. Busy as it was, I had to squeeze in pumping time, which was a good 15-30 minutes per session for five times a day! My solution was to become anti-social. After arriving at the office, pump time. Then work. By this time, my friends would be at the coffee room for breakfast, calling me to join them. But I had to decline because I had to finish as much pleading-drafting as I could. After they're done, it was time to pump again. Work. Then lunch with friends. After lunch, I couldn't stay for coffee or dessert or chika, because again, I had to pump. Merienda time was spent in my room, and you guessed it right, by pumping milk. Before dinner and before going home, another pumping session. It was a sacrifice, indeed. For a while, I missed out on important stories from my friends. A lot of times, I felt so isolated and grown up. I also had to work overtime just so I could finish all my work and beat my deadline. And anti-social also meant no more time for social networks. *wink*

The non-expert says...Prioritize. Be anti-social, if necessary, and until you have adjusted to your new schedule.

4. When I am out of the office or on the road...

My schedule on item (3) above were the easy days. During days where I had a scheduled hearing or legwork, I had to carefully study and plan ahead. I had to make sure I pumped before leaving the house and I must be at the office after three hours, in time for the next pumping session. With heavy traffic and clogged court dockets and late judges, a three-hour travel time was impossible. What worked for me? I would normally excuse myself from the court staff, use their room and pump in a corner with just a nursing cover! If that was not possible, I had to take the pain and tenderness of my breasts filled with milk until I arrive at the office. There I would pump with a sigh of sooooo much relief!

Whenever we go home to the province and we were stuck in traffic at the time of my pumping session, I pump inside the car just armed with a nursing cover. For this reason, I also had my Farlin manual breast pump ready, and my clothes should always be pumping-friendly.

I had a friend who pumped in the comfort room of malls, just to empty her breast and keep the milk-production system going. She would discard the collected milk after, for hygienic reasons obviously. This was also a sound advice, which I did not do though. For my mall days, I just had to cut the trips short and make sure to go home in time for my pumping schedule. Otherwise, I would have to bear with engorgement and tenderness until we arrived home.

The non-expert says...Pumaraan, so that you can pump whenever, wherever!

5. When I couldn't go home to deliver collected milk as scheduled...

If you had been reading my blog, you would know that I left Zohan in the province with my in-laws for almost three months before we finally brought him to Manila. During those days, the husband and I would go home to him on Wednesdays and Fridays, and we would bring the milk which I collected while I was away from him. There were instances however, that the milk supply which I left would be consumed long before we arrived with the new supply. While waiting, he would supplement with formula, at least for a few feedings. Looking back, I know I could have done something about it, like go home thrice a week if necessary, just so he would not be fed with formula milk. I was a new mother adjusting with heavy workload and crazy schedule, and the husband was adjusting with the long drive home and getting up earlier than usual for work the next day. We did what we can do. At any rate, those backlash were only few in the story of my breastfeeding life. And since he arrived in Manila, I vowed to make sure he would be exclusively breastfed.

The non-expert says...Sometimes, James Ingram is right. I did my best, but I guess my best wasn't good enough.

By far, these are the most difficult struggles that I had to face to continue breastfeeding my first born. At almost six months, I am still breastfeeding and feeling very happy and comfortable about it. There are challenges for sure. But nothing is impossible for an indefatigable advocate. I can only share with you my experiences in the hope that you may be inspired to breastfeed in the future, or that you may progressively advance if you have already commenced with the daunting task.

You can take it from me. Or not.

===========================================================

Please do check out the other carnival entries!

The Articulate Pen's Breastfeeding needs Patience

Diapers and Stethoscope's Back to Basic

My Mommyology's What I've Learned About Breastfeeding
Ms. Masungit's From One Mom To Another

The Odyssey of Dinna's Breastfeeding Words of Wisdom

Mrs. Bry126's We're All in this Together
I Am Clarice's Paying it Forward
My Mommy Kwentos' Sharing My Favorite Breastfeeding Advice
Planet Marsy's Better Than None
Mommy {T} Coach's Saved by the Nursing Mommas
Mama Drama's Patience and Breast-friends
Adventures on Planet Mom's Stubborn Me! Sure Glad I didn't give up
Nanaystrip's Eat Malunggay, Say "I Have Milk" and Love your Baby

Starting at Twenty-Five's My Husband's Best Breastfeeding Advice

Nanay *Loves* Purple's Why Attend Breastfeeding Class/Seminars

Truly Rich Mom's My Top 5 Breastfeeding Tips for New Moms

Legally Mama's Take it from the non-expert!
Mommy Mama Rat's My Breastfeeding Mantra
Mr. Jacob's Mom's Breastfeeding Tips from a Non-Breastfed Mommy
Hybrid Rasta Mama's Breastfeeding Lists, Advice, Links and More

Apples and Dumplings' One Word of Breastfeeding Advice

Touring Kitty's Just Do It
EthanMama's Only the Best for My Baby
the canDIshhh tales' My Breastfeeding Advice
Mec as Mom's Enough is Enough
Chronicles of a Nursing Mom's On Breastfeeding Number Two - Redux

Spanking New Stroller from the SM Grand Baby Fair!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 05:49:00 +0000

I had been reading a lot about the Annual SM Grand Baby Fair from the mommy blogs I had been following (themisischronicles, manilamommy, mommytopaz, daintymom at marami pang iba!). I learned this was just the second year of the fair from last year's successful launch, and with a single receipt purchase worth P2,000 one could get a SWAGBAG filled with freebies.

So last Friday, 27 January 2012, first of the three-day sale, the husband and I trooped to SM Megamall MegaTrade Hall 1 and 2, braved the heavy Friday traffic, and attended my very first SM Grand Baby Fair. Oh di ba, ganap na ganap ang pagka mudax, kung maka baby fair!

It was actually my first time to attend a fair at the MegaTrade Hall and I was so ecstatic just setting my foot at the venue. I was literally giddy seeing all those booths which I had only previously seen through the blogs I read. Imagine how my eyes popped out seeing the booths and stuffs in person. I noticed a familiar face from one of the booths but I could not associate the name with the face, then I realized it was Jen of the famous Next9 babyslings and other baby products. I was too shy to approach her and ask for a photo op.

Anyway, I told you about my high chair dilemma here and the story how I've decided that instead of buying a high chair, I would buy a stroller instead. That way, it would be less expensive. And a stroller could also function as a high chair anyway. I would just need patience and bibs in feeding. So at the fair, we brought this Graco stroller for about P5,000 (originally at about P6,500.) Since it's worth more than P2,000, we automatically got a Swagbag, filled with all those swags!

Tadahhh..

Of course, there were items that could be of no use to us considering that the bag was not specially catered for us. But since they were free, who was I to complain? Besides, there were items that we could really use. Take for instance that Philip Avent's VIA Breast Milk Storage. Nanay already bought me a set, but we could use an additional cup for storage of his solid food. We could also use the St. Patrick's bib, the Ai-non mini towel, the LooneyTunes index finger toothbrush, Lactacyd rubber ducky, and that hanger over there! Anyway, after going through my loot bag, the husband assembled the stroller.

See how the little boy looked like.

Observant

Enjoying!

Not anymore!

It was a wise buy, I think. Next year, I'm definitely joining again the SM Baby Fair. Who knows, baka for the second baby na. Choz!

High chair dilemma

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 23:48:00 +0000

Now that Zohan has started on solids, the next thing that we need is a high chair. We actually got a list of purchases for Zohan which has been earmarked in the meantime in the hope of price mark-downs. Aside from the high chair, we also haven't gotten him a stroller. And a car seat. (Okay, crucify me. We travel with him without a car seat!)

I mentioned here that he received monetary gifts during several occasions. And while I would not want him to be exposed to expensive unnecessary stuffs, I felt like I had no right to be spendthrift when it came to those monetary gifts. When it's our money we're spending, I had to be practical. But if it's a monetary gift, I believed the giver/s would want to give him the best gift, only that they were quite hesitant to pick for me, or they just did not have the time to shop. So I'm doing justice to their thoughtfulness by buying him the best items without looking at the price tags. Well, sometimes.

I'd been ogling on this high chair displayed at Muji and Me in Trinoma. It's a Silver Cross Doodle High chair, which can be used as a high chair for feeding the baby, and with just one click, it transforms into a table and low chair. Look!

Photo source

Fine and dandy! But it's almost 10,000 peyses! That's why I needed to sleep on it before buying it. And sleep on it some more. And more.

I've also seen in the internet this wonderful chair that literally grows with your kid. It's one of the wooden collections from Stokke. And when it's Stokke, you know it's expensive. (Like, P15,000 expensive!) I really did not consider buying it because who would want to spend that much on a chair? Kabuhayan showcase na 'yan! I'm sure the gift-givers would agree with me on this. But for your viewing pleasure, here it is.

The chair that grows with you! Photo source here.

I have also kept on looking at Graco high chairs every time I'd pass by the mall and thought it would be the more practical option. We got Zohan a Graco Pack'n'Play crib - bought through his monetary gifts - and thought it would be nice if he would have the same brand for a high chair. This Graco contemporary high chair looks nice, no?

Photo source here.

Anyway, after much thought and deliberation with myself, I have realized that I have been caught up with all these baby-related purchases. Analyze these: when a baby is born, a snuggly is required to keep the little kid warm and safe; when the baby has grown a little older but not yet ready to sit on his own, a bouncer becomes handy; when the baby has learned to stand up, a crib is needed to serve as his daytime bed and his playpen as well; when the baby joins a travel, a car seat provides the necessary safety precautions; when the baby stops in a travel, a stroller is required to roam him around; and when the baby starts on solid foods, a high chair and/or a booster seat should come into play.

Really, the manufacturers never stop inventing all these stuffs because they know that parents could hardly say no when it comes to the baby. And the bad thing about the internet, and blog reading is that I get exposed to all these wonderful things a mother would want to give his child! Somebody cut out internet connection, pleeeeeease!

I have to disentangle myself from all these frenzy I am currently enmeshed in because come to think of it, I have been born and raised (uma-Adelle!) without all these things and I'd like to believe that I've grown up to be a fine individual despite such lack. Well at least as far as the husband and I are concerned. I realized I needed to be more practical and rational. I need to get a grip because I was becoming a lunatic mother jumping high and low with all these exquisite things. And I am not that person. The husband is also a very practical person, but you know, he's always on the side that would make me happy. So unconsciously, I know I am also slowly turning him into this extravagant and recklessly wasteful person. I also do not want Zohan to be like that. And since I'm now boring you with too much realization for just a high chair, I would snap back to reality.

I have decided that....

We could also feed him while he's on our lap (that's sweeter!) or we could have him sit down on his stroller as we feed him (then we could get a stroller that would function as a stroller and a feeding chair! Talk about hitting two birds with one stone!) Dibah??

So here came the SM Annual Grand Baby Fair, which put to a halt all my over-analysis with just a purchase of a stroller. After computing the money that we had at hand and making sure we still had enough left for gas to get us home, we finally picked up a Graco stoller of the same color palette as his crib. The stroller was originally priced at about P6,500. And since it's marked down, we paid only about P5,000. Half the price, or even one third of the price of those nicey nice high chairs. But it's more valuable for us because it's dual purpose. Yey!

I believed a first-time mother goes through all these crazies, no? Piece of advise: always sleep on it before purchasing! And always join the SM Baby Fair! Haha! It worked for me. I hope it'd work for you, too!

Busy Baby

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 11:14:00 +0000

If I thought I was a very busy person, juggling motherhood and lawyering at the same time, then I was utterly mistaken. My hearings, seminars, client meetings, pleadings and written memos to client paled beside the equally, if not busier, schedule of Zohan.

Ever since he arrived in the city last Saturday (29 January 2012), he had been receiving visitors left and right. It must have been hard to smile and chuckle and remain active for everyone who tried their might to stimulate him. What's worse than that was to keep giggly when it was already way past his bedtime. Anyway, it only showed how excited and extremely happy our friends were now that we were finally together.

SUNDAY

Our first visitor was Ninang Dutch and her sister Tet and mother Tita Gagay. Ninang Dutch went home from Dubai for a quick vacation. She and Tet and Tita were so crazy over Zohan- about how incredibly soft he was! They kept on passing him on and I was a proud momma because he was eagerly entertaining them with smiles and giggles. Not a single crying bout! By the way, thank you Tita and Ninang for the uber preppy Zara shoes! (I forgot to take photos of their visit, will wait for Dutch to upload the pictures from her camera then I'll upload it here.)

THAT look.. (Taken during that day. Will post more pics soon!)

MONDAY AFTERNOON

My officemates and Zohan's ninangs Joyce and KQ decided to have lunch out at our place to visit Zohan. It was quick but legendary! I thought that day was Zohan's happiest day of the week. Just look at the photos which his Ninang KQ put together in a collage.

He kept on giggling and giggling with Ninang Joyce's antics, which I know for sure would make her Ninang look forward to having a kid of her own sooner than later. Haha!

Ninang KQ and Ninang Joyce

MONDAY NIGHT

Of course, her titos and titas would definitely miss the little boy because we would not be going home to their province as often as we used to. And true enough, first working day of the week after we left, here's Tita Irish and Tita Imee making a visit! He was still active and happy like he had an enormous reserve of energy inside his tiny body!


Tita Imee and Tita Irish

TUESDAY

It's time for Nanay's close friends to come over! Here came Ninang Jona, Ninong Butch, their son Caleb, and Tita Masha!

Ninang Jona, Tita Masha, Caleb and Ninong Butch

Jona and I had been planning of having a playdate for our sons, who were only four months apart. But the trouble was, Caleb was so active and strong and kulit and Zohan was also a handful, so we had to have our hands ready to separate them in case it turned to be a hurting match! But they looked cute together!

Thank you Marasigan Family for the bath towel and the dining set for Zohan, and Tita Masha for the shopping money!

THURSDAY

It's Vakler night!

Tita Boinks, Ninang Joyce and Ninang Fila

My beki friends came over for dinner. I just had to warn our companion in the house that they should prepare their ears for extremely loud beki conversations and laughters lest they had the shock of their lives! Haha. The little boy still smiled and giggled from Ninang Joyce's antics, but not as much as he did the other day. I realized I should give him some slack because he had received torture after torture to laugh and giggle the entire week. And perhaps, he was probably still adjusting to his new environment as well. I thought he would retire to bed early, but long after our visitors had left, he was still fussy and awake. He slept around 11pm and woke up at 7am the next day.

FRIDAY

I need more practice in taking pictures, no?

Mama and Papa would be going to Iloilo on Saturday and they decided to spent the night here to see Zohan whom they sorely missed. Papa sang to him his own version of Nescafe's Good Morning sa Inyo, which Zohan used to hear from him every single day, from sunrise to sunset. Mama was her usual - motherly caring and missing Zohan so dearly. I didn't carry the boy the entire night and allowed her lola to cuddle him to her heart's content. Tita Imee and Tita Irish also came to play with the boy for a while.

SATURDAY

With Ninang Janice and Ninong Onel

And I thought it was only until Friday that we would have visitors. But at the last minute, Tatay had a drinking session with Zohan's Ninong Onel and Ninang Janice. The little boy didn't play as much because they arrived a little late, almost Zohan's bedtime. Well, actually it's my preferred bedtime, because you know, he had an erratic sleeping time that ranged from 9:00 PM to as late as midnight. That night, he slept a little past 9:00PM, and I was a happy mother! (Thank you Ninang and Ninong for another dining set for Zohan.)

It had been a busy busy week! But I hope he had adjusted well, because for parents who were frequented by friends a lot, this week was just the tip of the iceberg!

The cool bath tub

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 13:54:00 +0000

Wouldn't it be cool if baby bath tub didn't take up a ridiculous amount of space when not in use? This question triggered the awesome inventors of FlexiBath to come up with this really amazing bath tub, which now rests in our tiny laundry area.

I first heard about the FlexiBath over there at MommyTopaz's blog. I agreed with her and thought it was really cool and clever, but it was a little pricey for a bath tub. It sold for P2,495 at Mothercare.

From the time Zohan was born, he was bathed just above the countertop while he laid down on a reversible blue and pink rubber mat (Mommies, you know what I'm talking about). However, Zohan had grown bigger, and our countertop smaller (brought about by our moving in), it definitely was the right time to be a little profligate and head on over to Mothercare.

At Mothercare, Greenbelt 5

The husband preferred the blue FlexiBath. I would have wanted the translucent one with blue on the corners because I think it's more gender-neutral. But the husband said little girls (our future little girls) wouldn't complain if they're being bathed on a blue tub. Being the submissive wife that I was - at certain times- I acceded to buying the blue FlexiBath.

We waited for Zohan to arrive at our place before we used it, so I was really excited this morning to try it.

Here it is, ready for Zohan

After lavishing the baby with oil (by the way, can anyone tell me if this is okay? I just get used to doing it before bath time because that's what the old folks at home advised me), it was time for some splash...

Notice the inquisitive eyes

I had mentioned before that Zohan could not yet sit without support. At first, he was okay just resting his arms on both sides of the tub. But as we went along, he got tired and slid off. So we weren't able to bathed him sitting down.

Nanay trying to support him so he could remain seated

There were no photos of the real action because what happened next was a lot of splashing from Zohan and wet clothes and stressed looks from me. It was a little difficult to bathed him this way so somebody had to stand him up while I did the bathing for him. Maybe when he's older and able to sit without support, it would be a more enjoyable experience for both of us.

Be that as it may, I was just happy with his exquisite bath tub. I had vowed not to introduce him to expensive unnecessary things, and this bath tub was exactly that. But he was given money as gifts for several occasions like when he was born/baptized/first Christmas, so I felt I had no right to be spendthrift with those monetary gifts.

So, this is where your gifts go, people. Thank you very much!

Finalmente!

noreply@blogger.com (legallymama) — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 06:32:00 +0000

After contending with delayed turn-over, nanny who backed out, space fuming with paint, raising money for the necessary appliances, finally...

Guess who just arrived!

Nanay, where the hell am I?

You're finally home sweetheart. And Nanay and Tatay are just over the moon!

What? This is the third time you've said I am home.

Yes baby, this is your home, too. And your Nanay and Tatay's homes in the provinces are also your home. But here, we will try as much as possible to be a happy family. Nanay and Tatay are both afraid, but hopeful that we can pull it off.

Afraid? How can you raise me if you're afraid??

That's alright, sweety. Everybody's always afraid of something. When you grow up, you will have your own demons and your own fears, too. But you have to remember that we will always be by your side. We will not be the perfect parents, but we will always try to give our best.

Look me in the eye and tell me we're going to be fine.

We are going to be fine. There will be tough times ahead, sure. But pinky promise, we are always in this together..

Okay, that sounds fair to me. I can rest now. Please don't forget to turn off the lights.

Welcome home Zohan!