Matthew Glidden's Blog

Uncle Allen

2013-02-04T11:02:00.000-05:00

He was born Aug. 23, 1949, in Coshocton, Ohio, to Billy E. and Viola Bitikofer Glidden. Allen graduated from Dover High School, Dover, Ohio, in 1967; after graduation, Allen entered the United States Marine Corps, where he served four years of active duty. He served in Vietnam from 1969-1970, where he served in 10 operations including the 1968 Tet Offensive and Operation Rolling Thunder. He was also stationed at Paris Island, S.C., Camp Pendleton, Calif., Okinawa and Camp Lejeune. He was a member of First Alliance Church on Arnold Road, where he served on many boards and committees. He also served as the Alliance Men's president of the Christian and Missionary Alliance South Atlantic District for 11 years. Upon his return from Vietnam, Allen became engaged to Rhonda Kollar, and they married Aug. 19, 1970. They recently celebrated 42 wonderful years of marriage this past August. While residing in Ohio, Allen worked for Reeves Steel/Empire Detroit Cyclops Corp, Reese Trucking and Baker Hi-Way Express. In 1979, they moved to North Carolina where Allen worked for Spector Freight/Viking Division and later became general manager of Cargo Carriers/American Transport, where he worked until his illness forced him to quit. Allen was preceded in death by his father, Billy E. Glidden and grandparents Frank and Eva Glidden and Elmer and Mary Bitikofer.

Allen is survived by his loving and devoted wife, Rhonda Kollar Glidden of the home; two wonderful sons, Frank and Tim Glidden, both of Myrtle Beach, S.C.; his mother of Lexington; brothers Byron Glidden and wife Debra of Eugene, Ore., and the Rev. Terry Glidden and wife Judy of Stilwell, Kan.; brothers-in-law and sisters-in law Stan and Brenda Schupbach of Dover, Ohio, and Brad and Sue Kollar of Holiday, Fla.; numerous nieces and nephews; and extended family and special friends/neighbors Steve and Carolyn Temple of Lexington.

Matthew 6:33: "Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you." Allen modeled the life of Christ and was an inspiration to many.

Memorials may be directed to First Alliance Church, Playground Fund, 1370 Arnold Road, Lexington, NC 27295.

Online condolences may be made at www.davidsonfuneralhome.net.

(from The Dispatch)

In my last few visits with my uncle Allen I was most impressed with his deep commitment to his faith and his family. In my mind, that is his legacy. I hope to have the same legacy.

I share in his faith, therefore, I believe in resurrection. I believe that when we lower Allen's perishable, weak, natural body into the ground today, it will be resurrected imperishable, in power, a spiritual body. I Corinthians 15 elaborates on the hope of resurrection. Hope is a powerful thing. Allen modeled that hope for many many people. I will miss him for now, but I hope to see him soon.

Becoming a fool

2013-01-22T09:35:00.000-05:00

I recently read the book, Leadership and Self Deception. In a nutshell it is about how if we want lasting success in life then we have to learn how to value others and learn to focus on others rather than ourselves. The book is challenging, because it is counter-intuitive. We are wired to focus on ourselves. It would make sense if like worked this way: "the more I focus on myself the better off I will become." But the challenge of the book is that actually life works this way: "the more I focus on others the better off I will become." It seems backward.
I read another backward seeming book recently, the Bible, in particular the first few chapters of Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. In which repeatedly Paul compares the "wisdom of the world" with the "wisdom of God". Paul writes in I Corinthians 3:18, "Let no one deceive himself. If anyone among you thinks that he is wise in this age, let him become a fool that he may become wise."
Becoming a fool.
I believe that a guy 2000 years ago died, and then came back to life. I believe that he walked on water---literally walked on water. I believe that this guy was actually God in human form. I believe that this guy, Jesus, is the key to my peace and significance in life. I understand that that sounds foolish, and I am ok with that.
Self Deception is subtle yet powerful. Is it possible that by focusing less on ourselves, we could actually improve ourselves? Is it possible that by embracing seemingly foolish ideas, we could actually encounter greater wisdom?

Is it God's fault or my fault?

2013-01-11T08:34:00.000-05:00

I recently read Romans 6.

I have been a christian for many years, but I still regularly forget how this whole christian living thing works. I understand that there is a balance to it all: reliance on God and personal responsibility.

Some Christians live a poor example of the christian life and blame it on God; they ask for God's help to overcome their greed, and then when the IRS audits them for cheating on their taxes they blame God for not keeping them from their greed.

Some Christians live a poor example of the christian life and blame it on themselves; they try as hard as they can every day to overcome their greed, and then when the IRS audits them for cheating on their taxes they blame themselves for their greed---if only I could have tried harder.

So what is the balance . . .

Romans 6:11 says, "consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus" So we are to have the attitude that sin has no power over us. We should live with confidence in full reliance upon Christ. Greed will not have power over me today because I am dead to sin and alive in Christ.
BUT
Romans 6:12 says, "Do not let sin reign in your mortal body" 6:13, "Do not offer any part of yourself to sin" So we can't just sit back and be lazy. Those are specific instructions--twice it says "DO NOT" Greed will not have power over me today because through the power of Christ I will resist greed.

So today I will rely on God AND take personal responsibility.

Ill let you know how it goes :)

2013

2013-01-04T09:51:00.001-05:00

Happy 2013!

In 2012 it was my new year's resolution to journal as I read through the Bible in a year, and post those journal entries to my blog. My blogging trailed off and became non-existant by July.

But it is a new year and I have new wind in my sails! I am looking forward to 2013. My plan for this year is to read through the Letters of the New Testament 3 times. I found this Bible reading plan here:

http://bibleplan.org/

If you are looking for a Bible reading plan for the new year, I recommend this site. They have lots of options and they email you your reading every morning.

My goal is to write once a week on here from one of my readings of the week . . . the writing isn't really the goal . . . the goal is really to be made holy by Christ through the washing with water of the word . . . but the writing will hopefully help document the process.

"The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year. It is that we should have a new soul." - G.K. Chesterton

fast food

2012-07-18T17:26:00.003-04:00

I am a little behind pace in my plan to read through the Bible in a year, but I am catching up :) I am reading big chunks of Samuel, Kings, and Chronicles--taking in the ancient history of Israel. I plan on writing some thoughts soon, but in the meantime I couldn't pass up this little gem.

In I Samuel 28 King Saul is visiting a medium to talk with the prophet Samuel, who is dead. After Saul chats with dead Samuel, the medium offers Saul and his servants some food before they go. I Samuel 28:24, "The woman had a fattened calf at her house, and she quickly slaughtered it. She also took flour, kneaded it, and baked unleavened bread." What grabbed my attention was the word, "quickly".

You know you are reading about a foreign culture when fast-food, entails a quick slaughter; followed by kneading flour to make the bread from scratch. Nothing spiritual about this thought today, I just wonder how Saul would have reacted to a drive-thru window in a rush. And I wonder how I would have reacted to a quick slaughter of a calf if I were in a rush.

Sometimes I forget how disconnected I am from the culture of these stories, and I am so shallow that the concept of fast-food triggers my attention.

humility

2012-07-15T08:59:00.000-04:00

". . . in humility count others more significant than yourself . . ."
the stranger on the street, the cashier at the grocery store, your neighbor, your co-worker, that annoying guy at school, that smelly guy on the bus, my wife, my child . . . more significant than myself . . .
". . . look not only to your own interests, but also to the interest of others . . ."
I wonder what would change if I asked the cashier about her interests, instead of mindlessly standing their listening to the beeps of the scanner.
I wonder what would change if I showed interests in my neighbors life instead of telling them all about mine.
I wonder what would change if I focused on my wife's interests instead of expecting her to be focused on mine.
I wonder if what would change is that my life would begin to resemble Jesus' life and the people in my life would become drawn to Jesus, "who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross."
Philippians 2:3-8

The trouble with blogging is, it all sounds so nice as words on a screen, but it is only powerful if I actually put it into action . . .

stop following the crowd

2012-07-10T10:08:00.001-04:00

Verses for those of us who were raised in Christianity--those of us who, as the verses say, "learned Christ." Many of us (myself included) seem to go along with the crowd.
Ephesians 4:17-24 (the message)
And so I insist—and God backs me up on this—that there be no going along with the crowd, the empty-headed, mindless crowd. They've refused for so long to deal with God that they've lost touch not only with God but with reality itself. They can't think straight anymore. Feeling no pain, they let themselves go in sexual obsession, addicted to every sort of perversion.

But that's no life for you. You learned Christ! My assumption is that you have paid careful attention to him, been well instructed in the truth precisely as we have it in Jesus. Since, then, we do not have the excuse of ignorance, everything—and I do mean everything—connected with that old way of life has to go. It's rotten through and through. Get rid of it! And then take on an entirely new way of life—a God-fashioned life, a life renewed from the inside and working itself into your conduct as God accurately reproduces his character in you.

May our lives be renewed from the inside out, and may we abandon the activities of the empty-headed, mindless crowd. That is no life for us--we have learned Christ!

selfishness

2012-07-07T16:45:00.000-04:00

I am convinced that there is nothing compelling--nothing captivating--nothing beautiful about selfishness.

Tell me a story in which a character is in love with himself and makes great sacrifices to make himself happy, and I will walk away disappointed. Show me a movie where a character overcomes conflict so she can walk away from her family to pursue her dreams, and I will walk away troubled. Play me a song where a character desperately wants to amass wealth so he robs from the poor and needy, and I will walk away angry. BUT tell me a story in which a character is in love with someone else and makes great sacrifices to make the other person happy, and I will walk away inspired. Show me a movie where a character overcomes conflict so she can stay with her family, and I will walk away enriched. Play me a song where a character desperately wants to give his wealth away to the poor and needy, and I will walk away incited.

And yet, the great lie of our age and every age, continually wins my allegiance--the lie that selfishness brings happiness / that my happiness is the number one priority / that my fulfillment trumps the fulfillment of others / that I am the center of the universe / that I deserve to be happy and fulfilled . . . however we choose to state it, tragically selfishness continues to garner my affection.

When I see selfishness modeled--I hate it. When I take the time to examine my life and see my selfishness--I hate it. I don't want to live that way--but how can I keep myself from sliding into that familiar pattern, popularized by Adam and Eve?

How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. Psalm 119:9

²⁸One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?”
²⁹“The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. ³⁰Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ ³¹The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:28-31

The lives that captivate us, the movies that enrich us, the books that inspire us, the songs that move us are consistently stories of love for God and love for others. May I live out that kind of story today.

you have done all this evil . . .

2012-05-24T11:42:00.001-04:00

"Do not be afraid; you have done all this evil.
Yet do not turn aside from following the Lord, but serve the Lord with all your heart. And do not turn aside after empty things that cannot profit or deliver, for they are empty."
I Samuel 12:20-21

Sometimes you read the Bible and certain verses just jump off the page at you. These are such verses. They meet me right where I am.
I have done this evil (confession)
Yet (hope)
do not turn aside from following the Lord (renewed focus)
do not turn aside to empty things (renewed perspective)

There is hope for all of us. We don't down-play our sin. We have done this evil, but we simply need to confess our sin and believe in the hope we have in our Lord. Renew our focus on him and maintain a Christ-centered perspective that will weed out all the empty things that tempt us.

strength in weakness

2012-05-21T16:15:00.000-04:00

"The Lord said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

God's grace is sufficient . . . His power is made perfect in weakness.

The process of shifting our perspective from power in strength to power in weakness is a life-long process. Perhaps that is why we endure weaknesses, insults, hardships, etc. our whole life long. It is a process of embracing God's grace.

May I take one step closer to shifting my perspective today. By God's grace may I catch a glimpse of my weakness and His strength.

like a child

2012-05-17T11:46:00.000-04:00

Mark 10:15
"whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it."

I am not sure what this means . . . but for as complicated and conflicting as faith in Jesus can be at times, this verse is reassuring.
Let the theologians debate God's sovereignty, let the skeptics struggle with His existence, let the conservatives argue over His laws, and let the liberals question His justice (and I surely will join in with each of them from time to time) But let us all come home to a simple child-like faith. Let us all remember the wonder that fills a child's eyes as you tell them stories--the peace that fills their heart as you let them under the covers during a thunder storm--the comfort that calms their tears as you kiss away the pain from their scraped knee.
No doubt there is time and space for the questions and the struggles, but whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it.

a verse for the celebrity apprentice

2012-05-16T11:49:00.000-04:00

I Samuel 2:1-3
"And Hannah prayed and said,
'My heart exults in the Lord;
my strength is exalted in the Lord.
My mouth derides my enemies,
because I rejoice in your salvation.
There is none holy like the Lord;
there is none besides you;
there is no rock like our God.
Talk no more so very proudly,
let not arrogance come from your mouth;
for the Lord is a God of knowledge,
and by him actions are weighed.'"

Talk no more so very proudly,
let not arrogance come from your mouth.

I have been watching the Celebrity Apprentice this season. It has been fun to watch a bunch of has-been / wanna-be celebrities compete to win money for charities. However, it has been frustrating to listen to a bunch of self-obsessed failures drone on and on and on and on and on about how wonderful they are. Maybe a handful of the contestants are talented, maybe the majority of them were simply in the right place at the right time to rise to their D-level of stardom--whichever the case each week I find myself shouting at the tv--"shut-up already! How arrogant can you be?!"

So, it was refreshing this morning to read these verses from I Samuel, and be reminded of how beautiful humility is. The Bible is a story of salvation--it's a story of how we need salvation--it's a story of God's strength and our weakness. He is our rock and by Him actions are weighed.

When either option is modeled for me--Godly humility vs celebrity arrogance--I am far more attracted to the humility of Hannah than the arrogance of Aubrey (or as I call her, "the red head").

The Unseen Power of the Gospel

2012-05-09T10:50:00.000-04:00

SEEN VS. UNSEEN
from II Corinthians 4

Satan has blinded the minds of unbelievers
God made His light to shine in our hearts
jars of clay
with a treasure inside
hardpressed
BUT NOT crushed
perplexed
BUT NOT in despair
persecuted
BUT NOT abandoned
struck down
BUT NOT destroyed
always carry the death of Jesus
SO THAT the life of Christ may be revealed
always being given over to death
SO THAT His life may be revealed
outwardly wasting away
inwardly renewed day by day
light and momentary troubles
eternal weight of glory
temporary
eternal
seen
unseen

II Corinthians 4:18, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

If you like starting your day with happy thoughts, reading the Bible may not be your best option

2012-05-08T15:16:00.003-04:00

I have often been told that it is good to start your day off with reading the Bible. So this morning I read the book of Judges. How can I put this without being irreverent . . . it sure felt like a lousy way to start my day . . .

The 12 tribes of Israel have settled in the promised land. Their leader Joshua dies in the first couple chapters, and everyone starts doing what is right in their own eyes. The stories in the book are tragic and gruesome. Even the "good heros" that preserve Israel are "bad" people.

Take the popular story of Samson as an example. He is an immoral, arrogant man who when angered takes vengeance by killing hundreds of men at a time--and he is one of the "better" characters. But we have to seriously consider how we are telling this Bible story to kids (and adults) in Sunday school. Samson was a bad man that God used to preserve his chosen people. We should never aspire to be like Samson, but we should cling to the hope that if God can use Samson he can use us too.

The book closes with an awful story that illustrates how vile the 12 tribes had become as they ignored God and did what was right in their own eyes. You finish the book feeling disappointed, dirty, and defeated. What hope can their be? But thankfully Judges is just one act in God's drama. Hope is coming.

So it felt like a lousy way to start my day, but I suppose I would get a similar feeling starting my day reading the morning paper. Political parties slinging mud--murders--wars--rumors or wars--economic depression--corrupt leaders--corrupt political systems. However, one thing that Judges highlights that the newspaper does not is that God is at work through it all. He has given us a free-will to do what is right in our eyes or to do what is right in His eyes. Sadly Judges and the paper generally report on the tragic stories of doing what is right in our eyes, but both leave us longing for someone to come and make it all right. It is fitting that Ruth is the next book.

I believe; help my unbelief

2012-05-06T08:49:00.000-04:00

Mark 9:24 captures the struggle that is faith . . . I believe . . . at least I think I believe . . . I want to believe . . . how can I tell if I really believe . . . it is so hard to believe . . .

"I believe; help my unbelief."

In Mark 9 a father brought his demon possessed son to Jesus with the hope that Jesus could make his son well. Jesus' response to the father was, "all things are possible for the one who believes." To which the father responds, "I believe; help my unbelief." Jesus then heals his son.

The father's response resonates with me because it is honest. He doesn't try to fool anyone. His son's life is on the line; if I were him I would of put on a face of total belief--I would have left off those last 3 words. But the father defaults to the path of total transparency--I believe, but honestly there is a little doubt floating around in the back of my head about who you are Jesus, and about how you are going to act in this circumstance; help my unbelief.

At times it can feel like there is very little room for doubt in Christian circles. It can feel like everyone is running on a full tank of faith, and if that is the case you feel like keeping quiet about your quarter tank.

I wish we could all be more like the father in this story. I wish we could be more open about our belief AND our unbelief. I know it's true for me. I know I believe (after all I am a pastor) but the gas gage of faith is not always full. Faith is difficult to understand; it is difficult to exercise; it is difficult to discuss. So with that understanding, lets be honest about the struggle--and like we see in the story, Jesus will work in spite of our unbelief.

weakness

2012-05-03T16:05:00.000-04:00

I just finished reading I Corinthians from beginning to end in one sitting. Paul instructs the church at Corinth in many different topics ranging from the role of women in church to spiritual gifts to the resurrection of Jesus. But at the beginning and the end of his letter Paul highlights the contrast that defines God's work in this world--In 1:27 he states that God uses the weak to shame the strong, and in 15:43 that what is sown in weakness is raised in power.

God is in the business of using our weaknesses to shame the strong and to demonstrate HIS power.

So as you read through I Corinthians and see the issues present in that church--divisions, sexual immorality, lawsuits, broken marriages, cultural clashes, idolatry, inappropriate use of the Lord's table, misunderstandings about spiritual gifts, disorderly services, etc.--one can't help but wonder if the Corinthian christians felt pretty weak by the end of the letter. I imagine they read it and thought, "wow, we have a lot of work to do!"

As I look at the status of the American church today, I can't help but think, "wow, we have a lot of work to do!" But recognizing our weakness is a good first step, because God is in the business of using our weaknesses to shame the strong and demonstrate HIS power.

As I look at my life, I know that I have a lot of work to do. I know that I am weak, but I also know that my weakness can be raised in power.

what moved Jesus

2012-04-27T14:03:00.000-04:00

Mark 1:41, Moved with pity, he stretched out his hand and touched him
Mark 3:5, And he looked around at them with anger, grieved at their hardness of heart
Mark 6:6, And he marveled because of their unbelief
Mark 6:34, When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them because they were like sheep without a shepherd
Mark 8:2, I have compassion on the crowd, because they have been with me now 3 days and have nothing to eat

Pity, anger, grief, marvel, compassion . . .

Mark's gospel is helping me develop a fuller view of Jesus. And if I truly want to be more like Jesus, I have to ask myself:
Am I moved with pity as I observe the sufferings and misfortunes of others?
Do hardened hearts anger and grieve me?
As I see so many lost souls struggling to make sense of this world, does it move me with compassion?
Do I have compassion for the hungry?

Do the things that moved Jesus move me?

God bothers me

2012-04-25T12:08:00.001-04:00

Having just finished reading the book of Joshua, I am conflicted . . .
This book contains the story of a faithful God who honors his promises, preserves his people, and does so in awe-inspiring ways.
However;
In order to honor his promises and preserve his people; thousands of men, women, and children are destroyed as God's chosen people take possession of the land of promise.

So on the one hand I am grateful that God clearly keeps his promises: Joshua 21:45, "Not one word of all the good promises that the Lord had made to the house of Israel had failed; all came to pass."
But on the other hand I am bothered that God clearly keeps his promises: Joshua 11:19-20, "There was not a city that made peace with the people of Israel . . . For it was the Lord's doing to harden their hearts that they should come against Israel in battle, in order that they should be devoted to destruction and should receive no mercy but be destroyed, just as the Lord commanded Moses."

But here is what I am learning: God never promised that he would never confuse or confound us. He never promised that we would never be bothered by how he works and moves in the world. Our goal is not to fully understand God, but to fully trust God--fully is the key word. I don't know that I want to serve a god that I can fully understand. I want the awe, the wonder, the divinity, the mystery that comes from a limited understanding. I understand enough of him that I feel confident in placing my full trust in him.

(Disclaimer: I am aware of the Biblical responses to my conflict--God is the creator and holy. Humanity is his creation and stands condemned. We all deserve the destruction that came upon the inhabitants of the land of promise. It is only God's mercy that saves us. Isaiah 55:8-9. etc. BUT IT STILL BOTHERS ME, and that is ok.)

Psalm 52

2012-04-19T10:33:00.001-04:00

Psalm 52
(To our culture, Hollywood, the music industry, and those that buy into their lies.)

¹ Why do you boast of evil, you mighty hero?
   Why do you boast all day long,
   you who are a disgrace in the eyes of God?
² You who practice deceit,
   your tongue plots destruction;
   it is like a sharpened razor.
³ You love evil rather than good,
   falsehood rather than speaking the truth.
⁴ You love every harmful word,
   you deceitful tongue!
(The fate of everyone apart from God's grace)
⁵ Surely God will bring you down to everlasting ruin:
   He will snatch you up and pluck you from your tent;
   he will uproot you from the land of the living.
(Don't forget what it says in Psalm 14:2-3
² The LORD looks down from heaven
   on all mankind
to see if there are any who understand,
   any who seek God.
³ All have turned away, all have become corrupt;
   there is no one who does good,   not even one.
So the righteousness that the author is about to refer to here is not found in mankind. There is none in humankind that is righteous apart from God's grace.)
⁶ The righteous will see and fear;
   they will laugh at you, saying,
⁷ “Here now is the man
   who did not make God his stronghold
but trusted in his great wealth
   and grew strong by destroying others!”
(If trusting in wealth and growing strong by destroying others is the description of the one who will be brought to everlasting ruin (v5), then we Americans had better watch out.)
⁸ But I am like an olive tree
   flourishing in the house of God;
I trust in God’s unfailing love
   for ever and ever.
⁹ For what you have done I will always praise you
   in the presence of your faithful people.
And I will hope in your name,
   for your name is good.
(I want verses 8-9 to be true of me. I want to trust in God's unfailing love. I want to praise God with other faithful Christians. I want my hope to be in Him and His goodness.)

the kid sitting alone in the cafeteria

2012-04-16T14:51:00.000-04:00

I recently finished reading the gospel of Matthew. As I read through the final chapters about Jesus' crucifixion, resurrection, and ascension, I was drawn to this sentence in Matthew 26:56:

"Then all the disciples departed him and fled."

Jesus and his disciples were praying in the garden of Gethsemane, when Judas approached with a large mob to arrest Jesus. After a brief scuffle, Jesus is hauled away and all the disciples fled. . . ALL the disciples fled.

I'm not sure what to do with that little phrase. On the one hand it is comforting that even the people that were physically with Jesus 2000 years ago had moments of weakness and fear--moments when they abandoned God for a safer option. This is a comfort, because God continued to use these disciples in spite of their failures. In just a few pages Jesus will be committing them with the task of spreading his message around the world. So there is still hope for me when I abandon him for something less dangerous.
On the other hand, rather than comforting, this little phrase is severely humbling. If I would have been in the garden I would have abandoned Jesus as well. I abandon him everyday for something easier, safer, or more appealing. As angry as I get at the disciples when I read about this scene in the garden--I should be equally angry at myself. My betrayal is much easier to hide, therefor I do it much more frequently. I recently heard it put this way in a film, it's like Jesus is that kid sitting by himself at an empty table in a crowded cafeteria, and I just keep ignoring him, trying to get an in at the "cool" table.

I think that I need to be humbled more often than I need to be comforted. The more I face the realities of my sinful-self, the more it pushes me into the arms of grace.

Big Chunks

2012-04-14T08:29:00.000-04:00

As I mentioned in my last post, I am behind in my Bible reading. In an effort to catch up I recently read through Numbers and Deuteronomy. Prior to starting this long haul of 70 chapters, I was dreading it. Both books recount Israel's time wandering in the dessert listening to the laws of God repeated over and over again. However, once I started into it, I really did enjoy it. It is a little repetitive at times, and it does talk a lot about strange laws and customs that seem irrelevant. But I loved watching the character of Moses develop. I enjoyed immersing myself in a distant time and a peculiar culture. I was enthralled by the story of Balaam. But most of all I was captivated by God--who consistently disturbed me by shattering my preconceived notions of who he was (and is) and how he should act. It is this final point that I would like to focus on.

Deuteronomy 4:31, "For the Lord your God is a merciful God. He will not leave you or destroy you or forget the covenant with your fathers that he swore to them."

Deuteronomy 20:16-17, "But in the cities of these peoples that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance, you shall save alive nothing that breathes, but you shall devote them to complete destruction."

2 strikingly different pictures of God.

The 2 passages listed above are but a microcosm of these 70 chapters (and beyond). I think if I had read through Numbers and Deuteronomy in smaller chunks, I may have stopped on one of these verses and either fell in love with God's mercy or become angry at God's command. As I read through the 2 books I was constantly vacillating between appreciation for God's provision and just plain outrage at God's commands. But the beauty in reading scripture in such large chunks is you gain a better handle on the big picture. You don't get as hung up on the details, but instead you focus on the greater narrative taking place. You see that God is keeping his promises and faithfully protecting and preserving his people.
Honestly at times I don't like how God chooses to protect and preserve, but the greater narrative also illustrates that humanity is created, God is eternal; humanity is weak, God is all-powerful; humanity is sinful, God is holy; humanity is unfaithful, God is faithful; humanity is just that--human, and God is just that--God. So at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter if I like how God chooses to work in humanity, because I am his creation, weak, sinful, unfaithful, and human. He is the creator, all-powerful, holy, faithful, and most importantly God.

Read scripture in big chunks--it helps you focus on the big picture, which is a merciful, holy God keeping his promise to a fickle, sinful people.

The Quarter Year Crisis

2012-04-04T23:16:00.001-04:00

I am about 1/4 of the way into my thru-the-Bible-in-a-year plan, and I have gotten lazy. The first few months I had a routine, and the Bible stories were cool--then Leviticus happened :) First, I got behind in the old testament readings and then in the new testament readings. After almost 3 weeks I was drowning.

I don't have any good excuses. I work at a church and am paid to study the Bible (among other things), so excuses for finding time are difficult to come up with. In fact it is quite humbling and embarrassing to post this to the handful of people that will read it. But my hope is that perhaps someone else out there is having a quarter year crisis with their New Year's resolution, and perhaps we can both overcome.

I have not given up. I have read through both Numbers and Deuteronomy in the last couple days. I am not going to fail at this, and the reason is not necessarily spiritual--in fact it may be downright sinful--my pride. You see I am a part of this group at my church and we are all reading the Bible together and discussing it week by week. I have not been able to participate over the last few weeks, and I think they are assuming that I am still on track with them, so my pride is forcing me to get back on track before we meet again. Perhaps its not pride . . . perhaps it is the power of community . . . whatever it is I am signing off to start reading a big chunk of the gospels, and I think that is a pretty good thing.

Regular posting will commence again soon . . .

God's Orchestra

2012-03-15T12:23:00.000-04:00

Romans 6:13, "Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness."

Offer the parts of your body to God as instruments for righteousness . . . I really like the imagery expressed by the apostle Paul here. I like imagining God up in Heaven conducting an enormous orchestra. The music of millions of horns, woodwinds, drums etc. all blending together to make the most beautiful music you could ever imagine. I like imagining my hands, feet, mouth, mind, etc being used as instruments in God's orchestra. He takes the parts of my body and fits them into his orchestra as instruments--each one making sweet-sounding music, but each one undistinguishable amongst the magnificent surge of music coming from the great orchestra of God. His symphony tells the tells the marvelous redemption story.

May my instruments be used by him today.

dirty dishes

2012-03-14T12:36:00.001-04:00

Few things upset me like pouring a glass of water into a cup that looks clean only to find the inside of the cup was dirty. You get the little floaties, or you see something crusted to the inside of the cup. Well, it is comforting to know that Jesus hates this type of thing as well. In Matthew 21-24 Jesus rails against the hypocrisy of the religious leaders. He calls the snakes, blind fools, and hypocrites. He calls them out on their lack of justice, mercy, and faithfulness. He even compares them to a cup that is clean on the outside, but inside is filthy with greed and self-indulgence on the inside. . . .

Throughout the book of Matthew, Jesus has consistently reached out to the non-religious people--white collar thieves and prostitutes, blue collar laborers and lepers. Jesus seems to want to meet people where they are. If where they are is neck deep in sin, then Jesus offers them a better way. If, however, they are neck deep in sin and pretending to be Godly, then Jesus seems to have very little patience for them--especially if they are in a role of spiritual leadership.

We all need to stop playing games. Be who you are. If you are a dirty cup--fine. Stay in the sink to be cleaned. If you are a clean dish--fine. Get it in the cupboard to be used. But don't be the cup that is pretending to be one thing when they are really the other--nobody likes drinking out of a cup they think is clean only to find out it's dirty.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation . . . but why?

2012-03-10T09:18:00.000-05:00

Psalm 51:12, "Restore to me the joy of your salvation and uphold me with a willing spirit." This is a verse that I have had memorized for a long time. I would always think of it when I was feeling discouraged or disappointed about my faith. The hope was that my joy would return so that I wouldn't be down in the dumps, because being down in the dumps is a drag. I would much prefer to be happy.

But this morning I read Psalm 51:13 as well. It says, "Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will return to you." It sounds to me like the Psalmist wants his joy to return, not so he can he can have personal happiness in his soul, but so that he can better share the gospel.

If I am not careful my faith can become very self-centered. It's all about me feeling good, so that I can feel good. These verses remind me that my ultimate purpose is not to make myself feel good, but to help others connect to God. Both perspectives require restored joy, but for very different purposes.