Keepers of the Krown-Love Your Locks

Everybody's Doing It

2011-12-04T08:45:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I ran to Sally's Beauty Supply to pick up some supplies (butterfly clips, bobby pins and such). When it was time to check out, the two ladies behind the counter were looking at my hair. The first girl, who looked to be Latina, asked if my hair was natural and I told her yes. She looked to her co-worker and said, "See? Everyone is going natural!" She then turned to me and said, "I see so many black women coming in with natural hair. We hardly sell any hair or relaxers at this store anymore." I must admit at hearing this I did an internal happy dance. Not because I see this as a natural vs. straightened, but because this is about accepting our whole selves. For me, I couldn't say I loved everything about myself if I couldn't let my hair be seen the way it grew out of my head. As the Latina woman looked at my hair she complimented me by saying it looked so healthy and strong. She then said, "Oh, I be it would be so long if you straightened it." I replied to her, "If I straightened it, it would just damage my hair and and break off. I much prefer it to be healthy." She agreed and and we finished our transaction.

As I drove home, I kept thinking of how many times I've heard other curly girls mention the how many times they've heard the phrase, "your hair would be so long/pretty/nice if you straightened it." When I hear this, all I have to think about is how much shed hair was left on the bathroom floor when I relaxed my hair. All I have to to is think about how stiff and motionless my hair was when I relaxed it. All I have to do is feel how soft and healthy my hair is now to know I've made the right decision to go natural.

Now this isn't to say, at least for some people, that they would like to measure their growth or feel the weight of the length of their hair. Below are some options you may want to experiment with.

Locks: This hairstyle is one that will take a commitment, but it will probably be the easiest, least labor intensive way to to measure length over time. Plus, it will decrease the possibility of damage from styling.
Mini twists: This hairstyle will last about a month if properly maintained and doesn't require the commitment of locks.
Flat twists: Similar to cornrows, by twisting along the contours of you head, you naturally elongate the curl pattern.
Wrapping Twists: If you normally wear your hair in a twist out, try wrapping your twists at night (like wrapping relaxed hair). Instead of using the paper used in salons, use a silk or satin scarf and loosely bobby pin your twists to you head.

It Don't Come Easy

2011-11-13T06:52:00.000-08:00

"Is it easy to do your hair?" This is the question I get the most from people about my hair. This is a tricky question and I used to reply, "Define easy." The answer I usually got was, "Something I where I can just get up and go." That's when I realized that our perception (all people, not just black people) of what hair can and can't do is completely screwed up. The only people that can truly get up and go are probably bald people, and even still I would want to moisturize my scalp from time to time. All hair needs effort; some more than others.

As a black woman, I too have fell into this mindset of no effort hair. I had this illusion that if my hair were straight it would be so much easier to manage. While I was able to drag a comb through it from scalp to end, my daily routine was anything but get up and go. The combing, the brushing, the moisturizing, the curling or flat ironing, the finishing. Even washing and drying was an ordeal. All the while, my hair was in horrible condition despite all the masks, creams and conditioners I used.

Even when I started my transition to natural hair, I still wondered if it would easier. But soon I realized that the process of managing your hair is never truly easy. There will always be a level of maintenance that you will occur on a regular basis. Now when people ask me, "Is it easy to do your hair?" I respond, "If you have an hour every few days, yes."

This is how I maintain my go-to natural hairstyle, the twist out. Here are some of the tools and products you'll need:

Conditioner and or low-detergent shampoo of choice
Hair clips and no-snag hair elastics
A wide-tooth comb
A plastic spray bottle (misting not streaming)
A moisturizing product (shea butter products work well for me)
A sealing or styling products to reduce frizz and define curl pattern
A satin sleeping bonnet or satin pillow case

Sunday: This is officially hair day. If I have any errands to run, I try to get them out of the way by noon. I will co-wash (washing your hair with conditioner) or do a deep cleanse and a conditioning mask. Before washing, I part my hair into 4-6 sections and use butterfly clips to keep everything separated. In the shower, I thoroughly wet each section of hair, apply my cleansing conditioner (or if deep cleansing, low-detergent shampoo), rinse and re-clip. Once I've co-washed or cleansed, I apply my conditioner for the requisite 3-5 minutes (or per the instructions). **Now this is an important step** While the conditioner is in, I use my fingers or a wide-tooth comb to detangle each section. This step will prove invaluable. Once detangling is done, rinse in sections. At this point, you can replace the clips with no-snag hair elastics or leave the clips in, but I've found that it is easier to semi-dry your hair without the clips (yet leaving your hair in sections will be a tremendous help). There are many specialty drying products , an old t-shirt or section of old bed sheet will do with a towel layered over.

After washing my hair, I start to detangle, working in small sections (approximately 2 x 2 inches) with my wide tooth comb and re-wetting the section as needed with a spray bottle of filtered water. Remember to always start from the ends of the hair. If you hit a snag, work slowly and carefully, even use your fingers to work through it. NEVER pull the comb trough the snag or rip it apart. It will only cause damage to the hair. I continue working my way up to the scalp. Once the section is detangled, I work the shea butter into the section until well incorporated. Then after working in a small amount of my sealing or styling product, I begin the two strand twist, making sure to add a little extra shea butter to the ends. Continue in this manner until your twists are done. Once dry or the next morning, I undo all the twists, spritz with some water and go.

Monday: About an hour before bed, I carefully work a little more shea butter into my hair(focusing more on the ends), being careful to not separate the curls too much as this will increase frizz. I then separate my hair into two sections and make a high ponytail on the top of my head and one near the nape of my neck. I then place my satin sleeping bonnet and I'm done. I will usually do this two nights in a row although if careful, I can keep this up all week. It really depends on how you want your twist out to look and how busy you are. Mine results in a nice afro puff I pull arrange high on my head.

If you like the look of a fresh twist out, I recommend doing the styling portion of the Sunday routine every two days.

If you have and questions or thoughts, please feel free to leave them in the comments section.

The Truth Can Be Hard to Swallow

2011-08-30T10:00:00.000-07:00

I find it hard to believe that there is a segment of the black community that doesn't believe they are giving in to a Euro-centric standard of beauty when they get their hair relaxed. I began to wonder why this fact seemed so clear to me yet impossible to others. Is it how one is raised or how you're influenced by your peers and environment?

My maternal grandmother had a very light complexion and her hair wasn't as curly or wavy or a textured as my mother's or mine or my sister's; but it wasn't bone straight. I remember being a child and having some of my black friends telling me that my grandmother had 'good hair' and though no one in my family had used this term, I KNEW what they meant even at a young age. Most black people, at one time or another, have felt the sting negative comments directed at their hair. I had figured out that my hair in its natural state upset people. Paul Mooney was SO right; but it seemed that more black people were angry with my nappy hair. I wondered if they felt I was misrepresenting the community with 'unkept' hair; but most of the people that had a problem with me weren't thinking on that level. 'Good hair' in their minds meant hair like white people. Straight, manageable, long, flowing, beautiful, desireable. Though they weren't able to or unwilling to admit this, what other conculsion can one make? Why spend so much time, money and effort to make your hair the opposite of its natural state, damaging it in the process?

Through centuries we have been conditioned to believe the worst of what the ruling classes have told us about ourselves. Our truth and noble histories have been buried, distorted, twisted and made into myths and fantasies. As we continue to struggle to define ourselves we must confront long endured pain and resentment stereotypes and lies have inflicted upon the black community.

I don't want to come off as anti-relaxer; not relaxing my hair is my choice and I am happy with it. Just be honest with yourself. When you leave the beauty salon with straight hair, flipping it with every toss of your head, think of the people you know with truly straight hair. If that's what you like, go for it. Black people come in all shapes, sizes and color; we might as well be just as diverse in our hair. Remember, we didn't always have the freedom to make choices as to what we do with our bodies. Appreciate it.

All apologies

2011-01-16T09:06:00.000-08:00

I am so very sorry that I haven't posted in such a long time. I want this space to be just about natural hair and with everything that has been going on politically, I have been distracted. I plan of focusing on the blog more and I look forward to sharing this journey with you all. Thank you for your patience.

The Things We do To Ourselves and Each Other

2010-08-21T08:00:00.000-07:00

Hi Everybody! I was doing a little research on stylists that may be adding relaxer to conditioners to be used on clients with natural hair requesting a blow-out and honestly the idea sickens me. This is dangerous beyond belief. I am not a chemist but I know that mixing chemicals without any knowledge of the exact compounds, mixtures or chemicals in either the relaxer or conditioner is a recipe for disaster. Just the relaxer alone, mixed properly by a professional, has the potenial to cause chemical burns. So why would a stylist risk losing devoted customers and their license by doing this? Did this phenomenon come about because stylists don't want to devote the time to working with natural hair or is this something more malicious? Have we abused our hair so much that this blatant and shocking abuse is just par for the course?

The black hair salon has been a staple in our community not only as an example of black owned business but a refuge for (mainly) women to come and be accepted. At the beauty salon, our hair was not deemed too difficult to manage or unsightly, it is simply your hair and you were never turned away (unless you didn't make an appointment and tried to walk-in on a Saturday). See, we were all facing the same struggle-to fit in with a broader social standard. Even though I hated getting my hair relaxed, I loved the atmosphere of the beauty salon. It was the place we could be ourselves and not worry about falling into any of the stereotypes black women suffer under all too often. It was a come as you are place full of laughter and gossip. So to think that a sylist would break this bond for the sake of a few minutes shaved off the time it takes to blow out a customer's hair is beyond me. If this is not a case of saving time, then is this some sort of backlash against the natural hair community? I should hope not; because the opportunity for a salon to broaden its business plan to include natural hair care should be seen as a positive. There is room for all of us in this journey; and it is a long, hard journey for us all. If sisters can't look out for each other, who is going to look out for us and have our best interest in mind?

Touch of Gray: Accepting Self

2010-08-20T08:00:00.000-07:00

Salt & Pepper, snow on the mountain, sign of wisdom-it's all gray hair. I convinced myself that using these euphemisms would lessen the reality of life and aging; but let's face it-I've had my gray hair from the age of 17 and trust me when I say I had very little wisdom then. My mother and father went gray prematurely. Edna Mae, my mother, was known as "The Silver Fox" and Leslie, my father, delighted in getting a senior discount at the tender age of 40. I, however, did not share in their delight. I've had every hair color in the rainbow-attempts-five years to be exact. Once I did stop, everyone loved the gray hair but me. I had a chance to look at some pictures taken on a night out with friends and I could see myself the way everyone else was seeing me (maybe it was the margaritas). It wasn't that bad. Gray hair is just another shade of me. It may not guarantee wisdom, but it does say, "I've been here a minute, do you have any questions?"

The Long and Curly Road-Getting Through Your Transition

2010-08-16T07:38:00.000-07:00

I would love to tell you that your transition from relaxed to natural hair will be easy. I'd live to tell you that you will never have to worry or think about your hair ever again; but I can't. You deserve to know the truth, so here is what I've experienced and felt during my transition.

Detangling: If you're not used to handling and caring for natural hair, getting started can be tough. Always work in sections. It is too easy to get overwhelmed trying to detangle or style a whole head of hair at once. I suggest you invest in several sets hair clips. I also learned that water is your friend. Curly/kinky hair should only be detangled when wet and with a wide-toothed comb. Start from the ends and work your way up. Some people use a Denman paddle brush to smooth out and detangle sections of hair, but if your hair is really curly/kinky I would stick with the wide-toothed comb. When you're detangling your hair, remember the weakest parts of your hair will be where the new natural growth meets up with the relaxed hair and where the curl bends. Not paying special attention to these area will result in damage and extra frizziness. Take your time when detangling and don't be afraid to spray some extra water on to help loosen up any tangles. If you do come across 'the mother of all tangles', you can try snipping it out with a pair of hair shears. Pulling and forcing the tangle will result in breakage.

Shampoo and Conditioner: One of the things I learned pretty quickly was that traditional shampoo was not going to work with my natural hair. As my transition went on, I noticed when I used traditional shampoo, it stripped my natural hair of all of its moisture leaving it dry, frizzy and especially hard to detangle. Traditional shampoos have harsh sulfates in them that tend to leave more pourous curly hair with less moisture than straight hair. This is when I started co-washing, using conditioner to detangle and add moisture to my hair then risning it out which left my hair soft, manageable and clean. When preparing to wash my hair, I usually section it off holding each section in place with a clip. Then going section by section I spray it down with water, detangle and add conditioner to the detangled section. Once all sections have conditioner on them, I let it stay in for an hour or two for deep conditioning. In the shower, I take down one section of at a time to rinse and detanlge it before putting it back into the clip. It sounds like a lot of work; but in the end, it makes the job of styling your hair much easier. Every three weeks or so, I do use a low detergent shampoo to get rid of any build up I have and this systems has worked well for me.

Styling: In my opinion, this has been the hardest part for me. When it comes to what keeps your hair moisturized and healthy, one product may work wonders for you; but it may not work so great for someone else. For example, many women rave about the wonders of coconut oil yet it doesn't penetrate my hair and just makes it oily. The same goes for pomades, puddings and most other products you would use for styling. My best advice when it comes to product is buy small or trial sizes if available, that way you're not spending too much or wasting a huge amount of product if you happen to not like it. Unless you have an allergic reaction or the smell of a product makes you gag, give the product at least two weeks of testing time. Also, start your testing period with clean hair. That way you avoid adding the new product to exisisting build up.

Ah, the dreaded frizzies. I live in Humid, Texas (better known as Houston) so frizzy hair is nothing new to me. I have been experimenting with a few products to keep my curls looking their best and so far, aloe vera gel has worked best; but it can be hard to find. There are a few styling products I'd like to try out and see if that aids in the frizz fight; but I really have come to terms with it. My hair is my hair, and it reacts to the enviroment just like everything else and I just don't feel the need to constantly "fix" my hair to suit someone's ideal.

Some of the best styles for those that are transistioning from relaxed to natural are:

Two-strand Twists
Flat Twists (I have yet to figure out how to do this)
Bantu or Nubian Knots
Twist-Out
Twist and Curl

I am working on getting pictures of these styles and instructional videos.
As you can see, from this last paragraph, transitioning is a continual. Even as I try to give direction to others, I am still learning new things about my own hair everyday. I have been known to fall in love with a product or routine only to fall out of love with it a month later. To me, it is like losing weight and keeping it off, you basically have to change your lifestyle and that's the way I feel about my hair transition. I've had to change my whole outlook and practice of caring for my hair.* The best advice I can give is to not give up. Things will get easier as your routine becomes more...routine (sorry, I couldn't resist).

*If anyone reading this knows me, they are giving me SERIOUS side-eye on this comment. I know my mom is saying, "What the hell do YOU know about weight loss?" I do watch "The Biggest Loser" fyi...

Semantics: Locks vs. Dreadlocks

2010-08-02T08:46:00.001-07:00

If you are familiar with our blog or have been to Keepers of the Krown, you've probably noticed that we use the term locks instead of dreadlocks. Growing up, my mom always appreciated the beauty of locked hair but hated the term dreadlocks. To her, the term was too closely associated to the word dreadful. To my mom, this didn't seem like a word we, black people, would come up with to describe our own hair. However, the term dreadlocks has entered into our collective memory and is the term used most in conversation. So, we will be using both terms on the blog to make things clear to everyone (I can only imagine how many locksmiths I've bummed out by using the term locks).

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8 Months Later...What I'm Seeing

2010-07-02T11:15:00.000-07:00

Hi Everybody. So, I am seven months into my transition and I am learning so much about myself and my hair. Here is what's been going on:

A return to my natural hair color: Relaxing my hair had certainly drained a lot of the color from my hair. It had become this sickly off-black, gross brown. Now, my hair is back to a healthy looking black.
Added sheen: Now, I've never had that natural high sheen look that makes black hair look even blacker (my sister hair type has a high sheen appearance-it looks like doll hair); but I have noticed my hair keeps a certain amount of luster throughout the day. I've even thought at times that I've gotten a piece of lint in my hair only to find out it was just the light hitting my hair a certain way in the mirror.
Overall improvement in the health of my hair and scalp: I've noticed a dramatic reduction of the amount of hair left behind when I handle it, so my split end are virtually gone. My hair retains moisture longer (which means I use less product, thus saving money). And the most important change has been the saying goodbye to a dry, itchy scalp. My scalp issues were so bad, I considered seeing a doctor or dermatologist; but I realized maybe the relaxers had a hand in this (duh).
My hair has grown: Or rather, the rate of growth now outpaces the rate of breakage. I was wearing a twist-out recently and kept feeling something moving my collar. I reached back and noticed it was my hair! I stopped tracking length a long, long time ago, so when I noticed it I was surprised. More important than the length, I know that my hair is healthy and is responding positively to being in its natural state.
My hair is more manageable than it has ever been: Okay, you may not believe me but it is true. Yes, I have more hair to deal with; but by knowing how to handle it and following a routine that suits my hair type and lifestyle it has made the act of combing and styling less stressful on my hair and scalp. I don't know what is going on or how to explain it; but I have a very 'tender head' and if I can detangle and style my hair without wincing, without losing a handful of hair all in less than 45 minutes, that equals more manageable.
My hair is incredibly soft now: It's true. My hair hasn't been this soft since I was a child! I can take a handful of hair, smoosh it in my hands and not hear that scratchy, crinkly sound extremely dry and damaged hair makes (yes, I said smoosh).

No 'Poo for me, Thanks

2010-07-01T11:15:00.000-07:00

I can hear my mother now, "Jasmine, you are so gross. Did you HAVE to pick this title?" Yes, actually, I did. I have learned the hard way that my hair hates shampoo. Even before I went natural washing my hair left my scalp dry, flaky and itchy. I always attributed this to getting relaxers or the constant heat that was applied in order to maintain straight hair or hard water.

I learned about co-washing, using conditioner as a mask and to detangle only to rinse it out, from of all places QVC. Yeah, I watch QVC for entertainment-tragic! Well, they were selling a product called Wen which is just a series of conditioners for different hair types to be used as a cleanser and conditioner. The reviews for the product were pretty good and of course the QVC spokesperson raved about it. Well, I wasn't going to buy Wen but thought if there is any validity to using conditioner only to wash your hair, then it should work with any conditioner. I can't even remember what brand of conditioner I used, but it did seem to work. My hair felt as if it retained more moisture and was so much easier to detangle. As my journey from relaxed hair to natural progressed, I experimented with different conditioners (Oyin Handmade's Honey Hemp continues to be my favorite) to find that my dry, itchy scalp was a thing of the past! No more flakes (eff you Head and Shoulders)!

Now, using conditioner to co-wash is great; but you do have to be careful of product build-up. I decided that I would use shampoo to wash build-up out every two weeks. I bought some all natural shampoo and after the first use my hair felt dry, stiff and was difficult to detangle. I did a little research and found some low detergent shampoos, a.k.a. lo-poo, to try out. There was still too much 'poo! Though my hair was easier to detangle, my hair felt dry and stiff and it did with the full on shampoo. I even tried to reduce my shampoo washes to once a month; but the 'poo still stripped my hair of its natural moisture.

My next step is to try a few methods I've heard about here and there. One is the 'sugar scrub' method. I love sugar scrubs on my body; but I am not too keen on having sugar stuck in my hair (plus more rinsing means more time under hard water). Then there is the baking soda treatment (mixing baking soda and water to make a paste), but I am fearful this too will leave my hair stripped and dry. And if these home remedies don't work, there are some no-poo products that may work. Last weekend, I washed with lo-poo, so in 3 weeks I will have a report on the no-poo strategy (I need time to build up some build-up:).

Katherine's Hair Memories, Part One

2010-06-30T11:12:00.000-07:00

After begging my mom for a perm, and being told over and over that I didn't need one; but how can that be, everybody had one, she relented. The pull for me was that you could get you hair wet and it would still be straight. Once I had my hair "permed" (I soon learned there was nothing permanent about it), I go home, jump in the shower to shampoo my hair. I look down and there is my hair, swirling around my feet in the tub! Well, I don't have to tell you that was my first and last "perm"; it took years to get my hair back to a healthy state. Once my hair grew back, I still wanted my hair to be straight, so I started relying on the press and curl. No one can tell me they enjoyed sitting for hours getting a hot comb and melting grease applied to your crown. Or getting your ear singed just enough to leave evidence as to how adept your Mother was with the hot comb, and the worst burn of them all-across the forehead, but at least you could hide it with your bangs!

As time went on and I learned more about myself and my hair, I started cutting my hair down to a short Afro, I changed my diet, and stayed as chemical free as possible. My daughter's hated my all natural stance* and I felt as if history were repeating itself. I, like my mother, told my daughters that they didn't need relaxers and them, like I did years before, pleading with me that everyone has one so they too needed a "perm".

I learned all the old hair secrets we were told needed to go out the window. I learned our hair is strong, yet delicate. It can be incredibly thick and impossibly fine at the same time and that kinky/curly hair should never be brushed while wet. The products available to us, from the turn of the 20th century to the turn of the 21st, were designed to make our hair conform to Eurocentric standards of hair and beauty. From heavy petroleum products made to bring shine and sheen to hair robbed of its natural luster to gels filled with alcohols that plaster hair into cement-like structures. Through the generations we have tortured ourselves and our hair chasing after a look that doesn't often occur naturally in the black community-straight hair.

Because of this torture, many black men and women believe many of the myths that surround our locks. If taken care of properly, your hair will grow, it is managable and can look absolutely fabulous in its natural state. We just need to be more accepting of our hair, ourselves and each other and as with so many other things, educations is key. For you naturals out there, share your information, trials and tribulations with those that inquire about transitioning from relaxed to natural or getting locks. We've let other folks tell us what is best for our hair for too long. Peace and Love to you all.

*Ahem, as one of Katherine's daughters I want to say that we didn't "hate" her all natural way of life (we know our mom is a tree-hugging hippie), we just thought her Afro was SO '70's and we were living in the age of huge shoulder pads and Dynasty-the '80's! The Afro was cool again with us in the '90's since we were all getting back to our roots via Arrested Development (the group, not the TV show) and Spike Lee movies. Just kidding! The 1990's really were an important time where many young black people revisited the struggles of the past, examining exisiting rascism and pondering what we could make of the future.

Overcoming Stigma

2010-05-23T06:10:00.000-07:00

We are all familiar with the stares and queries about our natural hair. Even when I relaxed my hair, the time period between touch-ups would invite comments about my needing to hurry and get my hair fixed. Fixed. Really? I guess I am thankful that I was never comfortable with relaxing my hair, so when I went natural and starting to see my real hair I instantly fell in love.

Other men and women aren't so lucky. They are surrounded by people so removed from their true selves that any deviation from a perceived 'norm' is cause for shame and belittling.

We must keep reminding each other that there is nothing wrong with being ourselves. We must remind each other that what we are being told is normal is not our normal. We must remember what damage we inflict on our hair and scalp when we give into a Euro-centric beauty standard.

So next time you're out and about and see a sister or brother rocking natural style, give them a complement. If a friend comes to you asking about transitioning to natural, give them your support and guidance. If you find that you're close to going back to relaxed hair, remember these thoughts. Why did I want to go natural? What do I dislike about relaxing my hair? Think of the money all the money you've paid out only to get damaged, broken, unhealthy hair.

The Men In Our Lives

2010-05-03T17:45:00.000-07:00

In the same advice column I griped about in the previous post, our Newly Natural Sister mentioned how her husband began to ridicule her decision by saying things like her hair looked unkept, socially inappropriate, ugly-just verbal abuse in all forms. The ethnicity of her husband was never identified; but the letter floored me all the same. I can't tell if I would be more angry if the husband is black, another POC or white. Full disclosure: my husband is white. He has never said anything negative about my hair. Before I went natural, he would comment how he liked my hair when it was wet and wondered why I tortured myself by relaxing my hair when it brought me such grief. Since I have gone natural he has been nothing but supportive and loves seeing my hair the way it is supposed to be. In my mind all supportive husbands, regardless of ethnicity, would feel the same way about their wife's hair. Even if we use the ridiculous analogy of going natural to dying your hair or cutting it; a loving supportive husband would accept his wife's choice in hairstyle or hair lifestyle if it made her happy.

Bottom line, her husband is verbally abusing her over hair. I know our hair is very a sensitive subject; but if this sets him off so much so that his wife writes a letter for advice to a website what else is going on? When this woman tells her friends about what her husband tells her, do they overlook the verbal abuse like the advice columnist did? I don't want to sound preachy; but really listen to what your friends share. Verbal abuse is never okay and too often leads to physical violence.

Then I started to think of the deeper implications if her husband is black. If he is black, he couldn't claim ignorance, though this is hardly an excuse for anyone not understanding something about your wife's body. The only explanation is that he has been so extremely brainwashed to see unnatural as natural that he is willing to demean and verbally abuse her, completely overlooking any happiness her transition has brought her. Then I thought to myself, how does he feel about his hair? Unless he is sporting a Rev. Al, isn't his hair also natural? What keeps his hair from being socially inappropriate? Because if the ideal is straight, Eurocentric hairstyles, the Zac Efron is in. If he hates her natural hair so much, does he hate himself or just black women?

So let me ask you, what is the best ways to handle those men (and women) in our lives that have nothing but negative things to say about natural hair? What are the best ways to educate the community about natural haircare and transitioning from relaxed to natural?

A Little Advice on Advice...

2010-05-02T19:10:00.000-07:00

There is a popular website out there geared towards young women that features and advice column. On this particular day the advice column featured a letter from a young woman who is transitioning from relaxed to natural and her husband objects to her natural hair to the point of verbally abusing her. This in itself is a problem (and another blog post) but I must continue onto the main issues I had with the column.

The advice columnist's, hit all the Wikipedia talking points of black hair (Chris Rock's Good Hair, more representation is media, social implications, etc.) which boiled down to, you can compromise by flat ironing your hair or getting a straight wig. Now, I am not going to put all of the blame on this columnist. This was obviously subject matter outside her realm of expertise and at least she tried to give the lady some starting points to get the advice seeker's husband to accept or figure out why he doesn't like her natural hair. In my opinion, had the advice columnist asked at least three women of color with natural hairstyles, the focus of her response would have been what is truly fueling the husband's objection to his wife's natural hair. It was never determined what the ethnicity of her husband is which I feel makes the makes our newly natural sister's cry for help even more poignant. At this point it becomes much more than compromise it becomes something hateful no matter what ethnicity her husband is.

So here is my advice on advice, be careful who you pose your questions to. When your car starts making funny noises, you don't ask your doctor if he knows anything about transmissions. We in the natural haircare community have to reach out to each other. For too long we have let the subject of our hair become taboo. We need to have real dialogue about why we have these negative opinions about our hair and what we can do to unravel the myths and stereotypes. We also need to stop harassing each other for feeling one way or another. Education through condemnation and ridicule never works. This lady should have brought her questions to us because we are living her story. Many of us have faced the same ridicule and judgement that she faces. Many women haven't cared for their own natural hair since childhood. If we aren't there to answer their questions, someone less informed may do it for us.

Keepers Of The Krown Update: Shop 'til You Drop!

2010-04-18T08:34:00.000-07:00

Hi Everybody!

The products page of the Keepers Of The Krown website is up and running! So if you want to try us out or are a long time customer, come on by and stock up on all your hair care needs.

I'm Free

2010-04-08T18:08:00.000-07:00

"I'm free and I'm waiting for you to follow me." - "I'm Free" by The Who

One morning, since my transition, I looked in the mirror and for the first time in my entire life I liked what I saw. I've always had a pretty high self esteem, my body image was healthy, I've never thought of myself as gorgeous; but I am certainly not ugly. The only thing about myself I ever really hated was my hair. Once I started going natural and seeing my hair react to the proper care and products I fell in love. I couldn't believe that this thick, beautiful, healthy looking hair was mine. Each day I find something new to marvel at: a wave in the middle of curls, the true color of my hair, humidity is an afro's best friend. At first, I couldn't keep my hands out of it; my hair has NEVER felt so soft or looked this shiny and healthy.

More than this, I felt something deep within. I was finally whole. I was finally able to accept myself for who I truly was. I was finally free. It wasn't just my victory, it felt like I was breaking my link in our collective and ongoing struggle for freedom and self expression. I know it sounds grand; but black people have been held hostage by Eurocentric standards of beauty. For centuries we are told women with fair skin, long straight hair and light colored eyes are the most desirable (thus most worthy of protection) and black women have been placed on the opposite end of that spectrum. Through technology and ingenuity, black women and other women of color, are able to mimic these sought after traits; yet are still vastly under represented in the mainstream conversation of what beautiful is. To accept one's natural hair, to me, sends the message that I am beautiful despite your constraints and definitions. I can truthfully say I don't give a damn what you think of me or what you think I should be.

My Hair Story, Pt. 2-The Decision to Go Natural

2010-04-04T07:49:00.000-07:00

Shortly after my marriage, my husband and I moved to Ohio. It was the first time I didn't have constant criticism about what I should be doing to my hair, so I just let it be. I had no clue how to take care of it; but figured that doing nothing had to be better than getting it relaxed. This is when I became acquainted with scarves. I also wore my hair in two afro-puffs below my ears almost constantly. I was not completely "clean of my creamy crack addiction"; I still got my hair relaxed for weddings and funerals. This went on for about four years, and then I had my moment.

My sister, niece and I went out to California to visit our Mom. I don't know if it is California or the fact that I was born there; but when I visit I am filled with a feeling that I can do anything, be anything (and "Estimated Prophet" plays in my head). Anyhoo, my mom has always wanted locks and while she was living in California, she found a loctician any realized one of her dreams. She also wanted to learn how to create and maintain locks and enrolled in classes to do so. By the time of our visit, she was locking hair in her house with a growing clientele. Mom had been thinking of opening a shop of her own, but as these decisions are hard to make, she asked for the advice of her daughters. Both my sister and I knew that Mom was serious about natural haircare (as she always has) and is very focused and driven, so we told her to go for it. The rest is, as they say, history.

But it was in seeing the happiness of her and her friends that attracted me. I couldn't put my finger on it (and it would take me several more years to figure it out) but I wanted that same happiness. Once I returned to Ohio, I resisted relaxers for a long time; but I still didn't know how to take care of my natural hair. I tried all sorts of shampoos, conditioners and concoctions but my hair still didn't seem healthy. On my really bad hair days, I would resort to my flat iron; but the damage it was doing to my hair seemed exaggerated when compared to my natural hair. I must admit that I languished in this "hair purgatory" for a few more years. My husband and I moved back to Texas and it seemed the "you need to do something with that hair" pressure was ratcheted up. I even had a lady walk up to me in the mall and hand me her business card-she was a hairdresser of course and pleaded with me to "get that under control." Sham-freaking-wow.

Then it dawned on me, why not search the internet (they have that computers now) for tips on natural hair. I was about to go all natural when, one of my brothers-in-law passed away. As I mentioned before, old habits are hard to break, and I got a relaxer before the funeral. I tried to rationalize my choice but nothing I came up with felt right. That was my last relaxer-October 2008. It was a long time coming, it was a difficult road; but it was worth it. I have been loving my hair and myself like never before. Each day I learn something new about my hair, I find something new to appreciate about it.

We'd like to know what was your transition like? How long did it take you to reach a decision on going natural?

My Hair Story-The Rise and Fall of my Hair Esteem

2010-03-27T13:32:00.000-07:00

Like so many other little girls, my earliest hair memories are of me sitting between my mom's legs while she separated, combed, greased and braided. I am thankful that as my mother spent hours forming and sculpting my hair she never made it seem like a burden or struggle. As a matter of fact, she made a point to tell me how strong my hair is, that it was a testament of the strength of our people. To her, and then to me, our hair came to be more than something to style and primp. Our hair was a gift, an heirloom, passed down from one generation to the next. It held innumerable stories of joy and pain, it was something that was undeniably ours that wouldn't be tamed or hidden. I was secure with myself and my hair. It wasn't until middle school when my hair esteem began to sink.

I now understand why they call relaxers "Creamy Crack". When I think about how I got "hooked" it eerily mirrors true addiction-peer pressure. I was soon the target of a group of kids I'll call "the set"; the one's that are so concerned with letting you know what is wrong who you are before ever taking a look at themselves. "The set" wanted to know why I was so different. They wanted to know why I didn't perm my hair like them, why didn't I like the same type of music they did, why didn't I dress like them. As a result I was called names and accused of not being or wanting to be black. Oh really? Since I wouldn't give up my clothes, my music or my friends I gave up my hair. I took the "it's only hair" line of thinking and from that first relaxer, my hair esteem plummeted.

I hated my hair when it was relaxed. I hated the way my hair felt, the way the products I had to use smelled and felt and I hated the way my hair looked. It went from being healthy and full to thin and weighed down. I would keep it in a ponytail, bun or pulled up into a clip after a relaxer. I didn't care about cute styles or what hair trend was in or not. Apparently, this wasn't the right attitude to have. I was still harassed for not getting touch-ups often enough and not caring about the cool hairstyles. I began to separate my hair from the rest of who I was. I kept it pulled up and back in an "out of sight, out of mind" type of thing. The less I thought about my hair, the more remote it became. To me, ignoring my hair was better than continually doing something to it that made me hate my hair. Though peer pressure was strong, I just couldn't give in as often and as readily as others could.

For the next 15 years my hair really suffered. Not only did I hate relaxers my hair hated them even more. With each relaxer, my hair got thinner and thinner. It broke off in odd patterns, shed like crazy and its growth couldn't keep up with the damage. In trying to make my hair into something it was never meant to be I was destroying it. I tried reducing my "habit" to special occasions thinking that would help, but it traumatized my hair even more.

For the next installment of my hair story, I will share the event that led me back to my natural hair. In the meantime, I invite you guys to share some of your earliest and fondest hair memories or times when your hair esteem went up or down.

Thanks for listening!

Confession of a Product Junkie

2010-03-22T12:31:00.000-07:00

As I type this, there are 2.5 million half used product bottles under my vanity. That is a clear indication I am a product junkie. As I was gathering links for a recent post, I was filling up my virtual shopping cart. While most of this can be blamed on my impulse control issues (I have the same problem with make-up even though I rarely wear it), some my neverending quest for the perfect product was rooted in not knowing what my natural hair needs. In this post, I will try to identify the types of product junkies there are and share tips that have helped me (somewhat) reduce my impulse buying.

The Trial and Error Junkie: You are going from relaxed to natural and have little to no clue what to use on your natural hair. Anything highly recommended by anyone has found its way into your routine.
Recovery: Usually, once this type of product junkie has found a product and/or line that suits them, they rarely feel 'the itch' to buy any and every product.

The Ooh-Shiny Junkie: "It's new AND improved?! Why it's GOT to work." I sometimes fall into this category of junkie. This junkie is easily sucked in by any new, buzzworthy, or as-seen-in product. Nevermind that some companies hire PR firms and marketing consultants to have their brands pushed (Hello..I watch Kell on Earth. I am hip to you). This junkie is also vulnerable to infomercials and QVC/HSN.

The Micro-Manager Junkie: This product junkie has at least one product for EVERYTHING. This person tends to suffer from product overkill, which can leave hair heavy, lifeless and just gross. Or crazy because you just don't know what combination of products your hair needs today and you've gone into sensory overload. I too have been this junkie.

The Impatient Junkie: If you've found yourself saying, "Why isn't this working?!" after a week of use or if your hair doesn't look like ______ from ______ on the first use and you are in the car off to pick up something else, then you are the Impatient Junkie. (This junkie is also looking for the perfect purse, shoes and man*).

I am not here to judge, I fall into every one of these categories.

When it comes to product purchasing I try to keep to these rules:

Buy in smaller sizes until you know you want to add the particular product to your routine.
Finish what you start, unless the product is truly awful for your hair (i.e. leaves flakes, dries your hair out, sticky, etc.). It is the best way to see if the product really helps since it usually takes weeks to get through a product and see results if any.
Scrutinize reviews when buying online. A lot of curlies are excellent at explaining what hair type they have when leaving product reviews.
To get rid of extra product, find some other product junkies and have an exchange party. What doesn't work for one curly may work for another.

My name is Jasmine, and I am a Product Junkie.

*I know that was terribly sexist.

Wash Day-Jasmine's Routine

2010-03-21T09:05:00.000-07:00

Hi Everybody! It's Sunday which means it is time to wash the mop and I wanted to share my current routine with you.

Disclaimer: My mother and her associates at Keepers of the Krown made their own line of haircare and body products. I have added them to my routine and soon these products will be available online. That being said, I will offer similar products I have used and still use alongside any Keepers of the Krown products.

What I use

12 0z. Spray bottle of filtered water and 1 teaspoon of Castor oil*.
Wide toothed comb
Oyin Handmade's Honey Hemp Conditioner
Oyin Handmade's Grand Poo Bar detergent free shampoo
Keepers of the Krown 'Mae Butter' Shea mixture ( I have also used Afrikan Republic's Shea Butter in place of the KotK Mae Butter)
Aloe Vera Gel

What I Do

I section my hair into three sections (back, left side and right side) and start to spray my hair with the water and castor oil mixture until damp but not soaking wet. I then work in sub-sections untangling my hair with my fingers first and use the comb on any stubborn spots re-wetting as needed. Once the sub-section is untangled, I spread the Oyin Handmade's Honey Hemp Conditioner on that section and proceed to the next area, using a hair clip the keep the conditioned sections out of the way. I leave it on for about an hour.
Shower time! I start in the back and begin to rinse out the conditioner while using my wide toothed comb to do any left over detangling. After the conditioner is mostly out, I use Oyin Handmade's Grand Poo Bar to get the rest out without stripping away all the good stuff.
After my shower, I wrap my hair in a T-shirt and let it dry for about 15 minutes. Armed with my spray bottle, shea butter and Aloe Vera Gel, I again start in the back. Usually, the back is still pretty wet, so all I have to do is use a little bit of shea butter from root to end. Lately, I have been rocking twists/twist and curl and twist-outs so this will be the example I use. Once I've used the shea butter, I coat the section in a thin layer of Aloe Vera gel, divide the section and twist away. I found that the Aloe Vera gel help smooth my hair, keeps the twist together without feeling gross ad gives it a little shine. I keep going with this pattern spraying my hair as it dries to keep it damp.
Once all my twists are in (about 15-20) I use the smaller perm rods to roll up my twist overnight. Yes, these can be a pain to sleep in; but I've found a perm rod pattern that fits my sleep-style and I have used one of those neck pillows you find at the airport. Now I think my head is used to it.
If I am going to undo my twists, I just put a little shea butter on my finger tips as I undo them. Depending on how big you want your hair, you can separate to the twists more for bigger hair (although you may get more frizz).

Hair Typing...I just don't get it.

2010-03-20T07:27:00.000-07:00

The most difficult part of my transition has been trying to figure out what my hair type is. I've lurked* around many blogs, forums and website trying to learn my hair type and I just get confused and it doesn't help that it appears there are different situations going on up there. The alpha-numeric (or Walker) system seems to be just based on curl/wave pattern; but this LOIS systems has my brain in knots. It also takes sheen, shine (I thought those two things were the same), frizz and the moisture absorption.
So, since I have yet to figure out what my hair is like with a cute little code, you'll be getting the long, wordy, drawn out version. Yay you.

Let's start with the back. From the nape of the neck to about halfway up the ear, my hair has very skinny spiral curls. They look like the springs in a retractable pen but longer and thicker. I am pretty confident that this area is 4A (if 4A means having a definite curl pattern and 4B is more of a zig-zag or less defined). After this point, it's all crazy. Around my ears and temples, it looks like my hair is more 3C than any thing else. Around my forehead and crown, my hair is 3B. There is one section just below the crown and to the right that is just sad. I've been calling it 3A; but it is not even that curly. It's just a slightly wavy chunk of hair and I have no idea how it got there.
It took me months to even figure this out (hey, I never claimed to be a genius). So as the story goes on, you will have some idea of what I'm working with. We will add pictures once I figure out how.

*I don't want to sound creepy and I will always give credit where credit is due. I'm just a fly low and avoid the radar type person. I don't Facebook, Twitter or anything like that. I even hate having my picture taken. The only reason I am doing this is because my mom asked and she still will back hand me.**
**Okay, she won't really*** hit me , partly because I live halfway across the country (and she never back handed me-I am just being an ass) and she loves me.
***She really is going to hit me after reading this post.

Hello and please forgive us...

2010-03-14T08:18:00.000-07:00

Hi Everybody. This is our first venture into the blogosphere, so please bear with us. I have NO clue what I am doing (yes, I am currently waiting for my copy of Blogging for Dummies), so for the time being we will not be a fancy-dancy blog.

Let me introduce myself. I am Katherine's daughter, Jasmine, and will be sharing my transition story and thoughts on my hair in the past. As I've been going along my journey, I've realized how much stress and even pain my hair (or rather the state of it) has caused.

So, we hope you stick around and follow our journey. If you live (or will be) in the Los Angeles area, we will have updates on products and what is going on at Keepers of the Krown.

LOVE YOUR NATURAL HAIR!!!!

2010-02-26T15:52:00.000-08:00

Who said our natural hair is not beautiful!?!?!?! Who started that tale? There is nothing wrong/ugly/harsh about the hair on our head!