Caffeinated Goodness

Here's a Hint

2012-02-08T20:29:00.000-04:00

Turns out people are not going to University and are taking other means of post secondary education, and the powers that be are wondering WHY.

Well there are a few reasons:

Tuition is disgustingly high. 50,000 dollars for a domestic B.A. in Canada, plus student loan interest, mean student debt that could otherwise be used to buy a rather nice car or half a house.
A lot of jobs offer on the job training or will train you for the job you're applying for. Take mine for instance; they will literally pay me to train to be something else if I get a posting.
We are in need of trades people just as much as other "highly skilled workers" and with the population of "highly skilled workers" going up to 75 years old in some cases that expensive piece of paper on a wall isn't significant when you're looking forward to being a wage slave afterward. Trades pay well and take less money to get.
A Bachelors degree today is the same as a High School diploma was 30 years ago. And, in most cases they, like high school, do not adequately prepare students for the real world.
There are a tonne of alternative courses one can take where they can specialize in an area of interest without the annoyance of a major.
University no more guarantees you a job than holding an egg brands you a vandal. Also, governments cannot guarantee that you will get a job within your field in most cases. The programs that do guarantee a job make it short term and only as incentive for them paying your way through. Exceptions to the rule include the military who, on most cases will take you for the rest of your life if you like.

So, maybe if there was some way of fixing some of those gaping problems people would go back to university. I wish I had something useful hanging on my wall...

0 + 0 = common sense?

2012-02-05T16:29:00.000-04:00

This article from the CBC was on my Facebook today. it's a story of how a kid in Fredricton was driven to cut himself in order to cope with his, apparently grace-impaired, ex girlfriend's harassment in school. I see bullying and harassment as something that just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I also think there's a few parts to the problem. One part of the problem is that schools can't do anything. This is an age of 0 accountability + 0 tolerance. It's an age were we've taken the right to discipline away from those in authority and left people to follow common sense. On top of that we tell people, "talk to and about each other" but "don't spy on each other" and "make sure you tell on each other". Students are inundated with social media of all kinds and given easy to hide mediums on which to say things and do things to one another.

We give people tools and don't show them how to use them responsibly. Kids, and adults, are told that there's nothing anyone (including the police) can do. Then when someone DOES something the offending person get's indignant and claims they didn't know what they were doing o that their actions were hurting anyone. As I said, 0 accountability.

Is this all in the name of some twisted sense of freedom? Do people get their jollies off doing this stuff? When we do punish someone for something we usually try to find some sort of justification for them. Tiger Woods had one extra girl for every day of the month- sex addict... Some people are legitimately sick but the ones who are just cruel and stupid have no justification. And nobody can do anything. The education system is like a paper tiger.

I realize that teenage girls are all fragile and whatnot, but why aren't we dealing with teenagers like young adults and giving them the tools to cope with things in constructive ways? Well, that's the thing... they are being given constructive ways to deal with things but they are choosing not to use them. The school has a Guidance Counselor. Why on Earth didn't the girl go there? Probably the social stigma of going. Funny thing is, the job of guidance counselor replaced school nurse for pretty much the same reason they had a school nurse. People's fragile little minds were being hurt.

It used to take a village to raise a child, now it takes a global village. The problem is, the only village that kids listen to now-a-days is kind of like the town of "little lamplight" in Fallout 3. Run by kids, for kids, and if you're a grownup you're not to be trusted.

Happy 2012

2012-02-04T16:44:00.000-04:00

People,

Stop being retarded. Seriously! I mean in the past 2 months I've been deleted from Facebook by 2 people for perfectly normal behavior. I guess I didn't realize "liking" or commenting on a status wasn't something one does when you post something on a social medium that you've allowed someone else to see. I guess mentioning that I know someone and that it's a small world that they know someone from a small university like the one I went to is creepy. Whatever!

I don't understand people. I had someone comment on a friends status that they "flung" me "like 10 feet across the mall", which I suppose is completely accurate except fling isn't the correct verb. I would say, push, is the right verb. And considering I was already walking in the direction I was (apparently) flung, and the person took a running start I would think it's simply a matter of momentum carrying the force from one object in motion to another which was going slower... but yeah I was flung. Idiot! At least I made his friend question his sexuality.

Unlike one of the people I followed for a couple months on Twitter (one of the same people who deleted me from Facebook) I am not in love with this crappy little sand bar. I could care less if it sank. I get a kick out of those people here who are so excited about PEI that they could rub one out to the flag. I'm as patriotic as I can be, but PEI sucks.

Winds of Change

2011-12-04T18:01:00.000-04:00

Did you know that there are conditions that makes it impossible to change a flag? Apparently if the wind blows more than 2kph it's impossible to change a flag. I had an interesting conversation with someone who had basically that opinion.

In November of this year I was driving to and from work on the Veteran's Highway here on PEI and noticed that there was someone flying not one but 3 destroyed flags. One U.S. with 50 stars and the stripes under them but the rest gone, a Canadian flag with one red stripe, and a Nova Scotian flag with half of the blue X missing. For some reason no PEI flag which I thought weird for someone flying flags on PEI but whatever. I thought to myself, "that's terrible, I hope they change those soon. And they really need to learn what order to fly flags in.

Remembrance day came and went and I traveled to and from work biting my tongue as I sped past the same house at 90km/h... on the 14th (that day it snowed) on my way home from work I saw the homeowner taking out his garbage. This was my chance... I stopped my car and got out and approached as friendly as I could, and said, " I'm sorry to be such an ass-hole on such a beautiful day, but can you change your flags? My grandfather fought in WWII, each of those flags means something to someone in my family, and they have been flying since before the 11th. "

The response was, " If the wind ever dies down I'll change them..."
I almost laughed, almost cried... then he said, "my uncle fought in WWII too, and if you're worried about things like patriotism you should petition to have our flags made in Canada and not in China." I didn't know what to say. I know that I hope Santa brings him new flags.

The thing of it is; you can change a flag in the wind. You can take them down, you can put them up. It's their job to deal with air currents. What you can't do is fly them when they are desecrated. It's no honour to anyone who's ever fought for what those symbols represent. It's actually pretty insulting.

Change your flags. If they are tattered, retire them. The internet can show you how.

Not Nice to Name Call

2011-10-15T16:52:00.000-03:00

It's not nice to call someone a "piece of shit" on the internet or in real life. Usually when someone tells you that they don't care if you think they are, and you have nothing to back it up (i.e. have given no tangible examples), they aren't going to get all butt-hurt over it. They may blog about it but outside of that your opinion of them doesn't matter. They are just telling their blog that you're irrelevant to them.

When you do it on and online forum you're just being a troll and the same in real life situations. The funny thing about one on one interactions online (like on facebook) people traditionally know who you are and in some cases where you live. It's probably not wise when someone knows where you live to threaten them. The best case scenario is that they assert themselves and tell you that you're not welcome to speak to them that way... or, they go to your house with someone bigger, or they get someone in a blue shirt to do the talking for them. You know, the guys with guns on their belt.

I have very little patience for people who don't know how to govern what they say to others. If you don't like someone that's fine. If you didn't like them from day one nobody is making you be nice to them. Polite, sure. Tolerant, perhaps. But when you make someone feel like they are your friend that's on you. Don't offer to do things or perpetuate things if you're insincere about it because chances are when you tell that person later that they are a piece of shit it looks worse on you than it does on them.

Before Throwing Rocks

2011-10-04T13:09:00.000-03:00

People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Neither should one cast stones when the target has ammunition to throw back. Regardless, one is whatever someone says they are and if nobody is willing to have the record set straight than that's the fault of the listeners not the fault of the accused.

This retard town has several people in it who like to throw rocks. They don't mind forgetting to ask the tough questions, they just fly off the handle and accept the facts that are presented to them without any research (besides a Wiki-link) and then dole out their own form of justice, i.e. destroying someones personal property as punishment for an infraction that has nothing to do with that item.

I suggest that diplomacy reign in this new world we've come to know and love since the towers fell. Before throwing stones maybe some questions should be asked and some level of trust established. For instance, if you're willing to trust someone enough to fuck them you should be able to ask them candidly if they are sleeping around on you. If you're going to call someone your friend than it's your responsibility to nurture that friendship and if you love that person as your friend than you will make sure they aren't doing something that you don't agree with. You don't fuck with their marriage without cause.

Before you slander 2 perfectly innocent people and running away, make sure you have the story straight. Because someday they will find out that you told people they were having sex and then it's pretty much "pictures or it didn't happen" for you. Remember, if you can't prove it than it doesn't stand up in the eyes of God or the courts.

seriously? you're terrible at being criminals.

2011-09-12T16:16:00.002-03:00

So recently, my car was broken into. not much was stolen... and oddly enough, nothing of real value was taken. the stupid bastards that went the extra mile to unlock my shitty car, and rummage through the contents, didn't even take the OBVIOUSLY valuable shit that was out in the open. they took a backpack... that had almost nothing in it.

honestly... there was a laptop bag (no laptop, but other valueables), an ipod AND ipod touch. a power converter, several decks of the WoW TCG with cards worth over 300$ collector's value, and several hundred dollars of guitar equipment. not one of these things was stolen... just the bookbag, and my friend's pack of cigarettes... with ONE cigarette in it.

needless to say, i was pissed... i mean, i go into the mall for some shopping and hanging out, and when i come back, some fucking hammytard has broken into, and taken shit from my car. and they didn't even prove that they were smart enough to make a few bucks along the way for their trouble... i blame the schools. anyway, i really hate people ... except for a few people.. but mostly, society is fucking useless. and the lower end of society is even more so.. because they're retarded to boot.

so, if anyone reading this (via stumble, or google, or accidentally thinking this is a porn site [talking to you, random asians]) stole my shit, go die in a hole.. cause it's the best thing you can do for yourself... cause you're fucking retarded... 100%. you don't even know how to STEAL properly...

belligerently yours
Wicker.

Don't Swear On The Inernet

2011-09-04T15:58:00.000-03:00

As you're aware there is no swearing online. The Internet is a pure and unspoiled part of the imagination who's delicate flower brings radiant glory to the world of proper, polite, eloquent dialogue and imagery... until you log on.

In reality, as real as cyber space is, the Internet is a ses-pool of degrading imagery with only but a few rays of light shining through it's otherwise degrading and boring "pages" which display all sorts of things from whores to how to pick up said whores. Take a second and google the word "carrot" in an image search. I am willing to bet real money that somewhere in the first few pages of results someone is sticking one up something. See what I mean?

The inherent difference between those spaces and the spaces, like blogger and facebook, which we control is... nobody judges them. Facebook, especially is a medium that you had better not swear on or else someone might not hire you, or they may try to use it against you in a custody battle. God knows that nobody before you has ever said "fuck" and nobody else will. You are figuratively the only one to ever swore online. The thing is, Facebook and Blogspot are just mediums on which people like myself vent frustration in an attempt to keep the daily homicidal rage stuffed deep within ourselves. It's much easier to swear and let it out online than walk down the street telling everyone to play a nice game of "hide and go **** yourself"

When making decisions on hiring people employers use everything they can including their/ your mutual friends and even your facebook page in order to make a decision to hire you or not. It's actually pretty annoying when you think about it since this is not necessarily who you are at work... but they hate people who whine on there. I find it hard to believe that one or 2 facebook posts containing an expletive would make or break anything however people are perfectionists in this retard society we call North American.

The problem with using Facebook and other social media as a basis for employment is; in 10 years you, as an employer, will inevitably have to consider someone who "taKs leik dis" on "dae FB page" or in real life... or even uses the good ole F bomb or the word "like" in order to make a simile out of every sentence that's uttered... terribly. This is the downfall of English and the product of the stupefying of the human race.

We are literally a group of people who are told to "drink (brand of alcohol) responsibly" because we're too stupid to use good ole common sense. Everything is someone else's problem... but that's not my point. My point is literally, "not hiring someone on the basis of their facebook status is like not marrying someone because they buy farmers milk instead of ADL" it's actually stupid to base that decision on something as trivial as a random facebook status, no matter how poorly worded said status is. However, there's still no excuse for misspelling things on your cover letter.

"what the fuck do you know, kid?"

2011-08-29T17:20:00.003-03:00

just a quick one, seeing as i just ate a massive home grilled burger (details on the cooking instruction for said burger if prompted... believe me, it was fucking awesome.) but i really... really... REALLY fucking hate old-esque bastard people in my home town.

i was in town to get groceries (mainly the ground beef for this burger that's now begging to swim in a cold beer) when i pulled into the store lot. as i was pulling in, a honda oddessy van cut me off, just to haul ass into the handicapped spot. no tag, no plate... just some self entitled fuck-tard 65-70 year old man with a grudge against generatons x and y (for those of you who failed grade 9 social studies, that covers current adults, aged roughly 19-30/35). as he waddled his fat ass out of the van, i remarked to him that, not only did he almost hit my car with his big ass van, he was in a hammy-tard spot, with no permit.

the old bastard then proceeded to try to lace into me in the parking lot... saying "your piece of shit car oughta be hit, to get you dumb fucking "teenager" scums off the roads, maybe then you'll have respect for your elders."

this was just the beginning, he spent roughly 10 minutes ranting at me about my misguided youth, and how i knew nothing, with me retorting back just so i could see him splutter (he was yelling, i wasn't). he then went on to say that "any senior citizen can park in those "god damned" spaces" and that i should be grateful he didn't just come over and show me a lesson.

by this time, the manager of the store (it's a fairly small local market, and the manager works cash) had come out, and asked the man to be on his way, gave me an apologetic look, and the man hauled out of the lot... almost hitting me on the way out... again...

what the fuck makes these crotchety old bastards the feeling of self entitlement, to just try to tell off "teenagers" (i'm 22, not that it really matters).. like, are they gonna try to play the "i was in 'the' war" card? cause i have an older cousin who was in the military, and he parks in the right spot, and is usually pretty calm when dealing with youth (i'm sure he's yelled before, but not unprovoked). the fact that he said it would be good if my car got written off worries me to his mental state, and whether he should even be allowed to drive. hell... half the people over 65 in my town probably shouldn't have a license... but most of them are just bad drivers, not uppity old cockbags.

maybe he'll get a nice 600$ fine for parking in a hammy-tard spot, and he'll have to sell his car to pay it... i dunno.. does that make me a bad person, for wishing that? i feel like it's justified.

anyway, drive safe, and eat well (i sure as hell did)

wicker.

your parents don't love you... do they...?

2011-08-24T20:06:00.003-03:00

So... for the life of me, i can't seem to figure out why every teenage girl (ok... not EVERY but you get the point) in my hometown, dresses like a slut. i mean... do they really think, that at 14 years old, they're gonna want to attract the attention that people (mainly 45 year old rapists) are going to give them?

i understand the wanting to look "trendy" or "pretty", but putting on 40 lbs of make-up, and wearing a skirt that a grown man would use as a belt... isn't pretty... stop being a whore, and live the tween life. the girls i knew when i was 12-14, wore jeans, romped in the grass, and were pretty cool overall.

i think the main problem, is shit like Jersey Shore, where whorebag ugmo's go around flashing their pussies at everything that moves, dressing like julia roberts at the beginning of Pretty Woman, and getting all the attention they could ever want... good and bad. seriously, people need to hug their kids more or something... the teenybopper craze is getting out of hand.

most the the "older" (and by that i mean 16-18) slut dressers in my town, have crib-midgets running around their ankles, and some cracked out thug life guy hanging off their arm. is this really the life you think you want? holy shit, people... you need to start looking at yourselves... cause i bet, if you did, you'd think "holy SHIT i never wanna turn out that bad" ... cause your life looks pretty shitty.

now don't get me wrong... i realize that some "families" don't have a choice in their looks... love is love. however, 16 year olds getting facebook married to thier baby- daddy's, and shacking up in the cheapest trailer in the park, then mooching off thier parents for weed money, isn't the life you can "not help living". sure, there's some perfectly happy, funny lookin families out there, who live in a trailer park... but we all know who i'm talking about.

the fun part about these piece of shit teens, and young crack mommas, is that they live their entire lives on facebook. "My mom took the kid for the night, gonna drink myself silly" is a common status of the teen mom (ok... i cleaned it up a bit...) but heaven forbid if you say one fucking thing about how maybe they should spend money, not on liquor or pot, but on diapers, rent, and food... cause it's "none of your fucking business" ESPECIALLY if it's on facebook for the world to see.

some "sociologists" will tell you, that 16 is the new 18, 12 is the new 16, and 8 is the new 12... when the fuck did this trend start? and i'm pretty sure it only continues, because people keep saying it. if people just start saying "no... 18 is now the new 18... " then kids might not be fucking everything that moves, and being disease and baby ridden by 16.... trends become trends when popular people follow them, and no one points out that they're fucking stupid (lookin at you, crocks). maybe if we collectively agreed that kids of a certain age, are that age, and not technically 2-5 years older "mentally", we'd see less teeny-bopper whore kids, and less 16 year old high school dropout moms.

but seriously.. put some fucking clothes on, kids... all you're proving to the world is that you have no self esteem, and want to be a slut to make up for it.

from the brain of everyone's favorite fat man
-wicker

seems i may be back.

2011-08-22T05:24:00.002-03:00

So for those of you who drank my brew a while back (ok... a long ass time ago now) you may have wondered where the hell i was...

well it doesn't matter, cause i'm back... new user, but who cares?

for the most part, i haven't changed. i may have become a little more vulgar (yes.. you're gonna see swears now... got a problem? that's right... shut the fuck up). i've grown up a little (and gotten worse in some areas) and i've seen a few more years of shit.

for the most part... i still watch a shit ton on movies (yes... a whole ton. wanna fight about it?), and for the most part... i have an opinion on every one i watch. and so help me God... it's more right than yours.

i figure the best way to start my comeback to the forum of the delicious drink, is to announce that i'm totally fucking sick of the remake craze. everything you watch now (and pay like 12$ for at the shitty theatre in *insert town here*) has been a friggin remake of something or another. the most memorable at this moment (it's like 5 am... i don't sleep anymore) is footloose.
as if we needed another fucking footloose rolling around out there... i mean, the first one was gay enough... do we really need to flounce a NEW version (probably with a "revisited" storyline... that makes half the sense the original shitty one did) of this god forsaken movie? footloose is just one of many, many remakes that have, or are going to, come out in the next year or so...

seriously... find a 14 year old kid and get them to pitch you a story line... is the movie industry that hard up for ideas, that we need to see a 14th version of a movie? (how many hulks and war of the worlds were there?) seriously... get a new idea. hell... i'd take another movie adaptation of a book, over another fucking remake.

sure, it's a rant about something that may not matter, but you can deal with it... cause you agree.
there needs to be more originality in cinema today. (i'm not even going to touch primetime television... do we really need like 10 fucking crime dramas?) for the most part.. these movies are ok... but they really need to be a dying trend. find something else to make a movie about. i even miss documentaries (except for some of that fat ass biased michael moore).

so, for you seasoned drinkers, an old brew has returned... and i should probably be posting more and more often, now that i remember how good this feels. and that this page still exist.

wicker. (formerly DBH)

Happy Pre-Birthday Canada (It's Canada Day, in Korea)

2011-06-30T13:06:00.002-03:00

Because you can't find them anywhere else online:

English Lyrics of O Canada!

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!

From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

French Lyrics of O Canada!

O Canada!
Terre de nos aïeux,
Ton front est ceint de fleurons glorieux!

Car ton bras sait porter l'épée,
Il sait porter la croix!

Ton histoire est une épopée
Des plus brillants exploits.

Et ta valeur, de foi trempée,
Protégera nos foyers et nos droits.

Protégera nos foyers et nos droits.


And for your entertainment...

So, what do we as Canadians have to be Proud of? ...

1. Smarties
2. Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp
3. The size of our footballs fields and one less down
4. Baseball is Canadian
5. Lacrosse is Canadian
6. Hockey is Canadian
7. Basketball is Canadian
8. Apple pie is Canadian
9. Mr. Dress-up kicks Mr. Rogers butt
10. Tim Horton's kicks Dunkin' Donuts butt
11. Canada has the largest French population that

never surrendered to Germany.
12. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on.
13. The Hudson's Bay Company once owned over 10% of

the earth's surface and is still around as the worlds

oldest company.
14. We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.
15. We don't marry our kin-folk.
16. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, Velcro, zippers,

insulin, penicillin, Zamboni, the telephone

and short wave radios

that save countless lives each year.
17. We ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal

and lived to tell about it.
18. A Canadian invented Superman.

19. The handles on our beer cases are big enough to

fit your hands with mitts on. OOOoohhhhh Canada!!

20. Oh yeah... and our elections only take one day.

You Know You're a Canadian When...
You stand in "line-ups" at the movie, not lines.

You're not offended by the term "Homo Milk".

You understand the sentence, "Could you please pass me a serviette,

I just spilled my poutine."

You eat chocolate bars instead of candy bars.

You drink pop, not soda.

You know what it means to be on pogey.

You know that a mickey and 2-4's mean "Party at the camp, eh!"

You can drink legally while still a teen.

You talk about the weather with strangers and friends alike.

When there is a social problem, you turn to your government to fix it

instead of telling them to stay out of it.

You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.

Pike is a type of fish, not some part of a highway.
You drive on a highway, not a freeway.

You know what a Robertson screwdriver is.

You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.

You know that Thrills are something to chew and "taste like soap."

You know that Mounties "don't always look like that."

You dismiss all beers under 6% as "for children and the elderly."

You know that the Friendly Giant isn't a vegetable product line.

You know that Casey and Finnegan are not a Celtic musical group.

You participated in "Participaction."

You wonder why there isn't a 5 dollar coin yet.

You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing

'u's from labor, honor, and color.

You know the French equivalents of "free", "prize", and "no sugar added",

thanks to your extensive education in bilingual cereal packaging.

You are excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.

You make a mental note to talk about it at work the next day.

You can do all the hand actions to Sharon, Lois and Bram's

"Skin-a-ma-rinky-dinky-doo" opus.

You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling nauseous.

You were mad when "The Beachcombers" were taken off the air.

You know what a toque is.

You know Toronto is not a province.

You never miss "Coaches Corner."

Back bacon and Kraft Dinner are two of your favorites food groups.

Canadian bacon is referred to as HAM!

You don't need to travel with a flag on your backpack.

Silly Rabbit That's Not News

2011-06-07T11:14:00.000-03:00

What has America been teahing us this past little while children? That's right. If there's no penis, it's not news. God know's PEI, no Canada didn't care if I showed someone a picture of my dick but the world needs to know if some American congressmen sends some college chick a penis picture. Why is this news? Isn't America founded on on All Men being equal? Therefore if ONE person sends a penis pic it's important regardless of their status in the nation. If I were an American (and I thank God I'm not) I would want it on the news if I sent a picture of my penis to someone. I would DEMAND equal time!

The Comedy network is having a field day with the Wiener pics. I know it's not real media but if it's important enough for Colbert it important enough for me to comment on.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Sarah Palen doesn't know her American History.

This is NOT news any more than the above mentioned penis pics. Everyone knows that she's dumber than a sack of big haired bricks and only 3 IQ points this side of sentient. In order to give her some credit I measure her room temperature IQ in Farenheit that way she at least has a 70-72 depending on the scale.

_________________________________________________________________________________

Why doesn't the media report on something that's going to affect the world as we know it? At least here in Canada a news report is something relivant. There's no retarded propaganda about some random thing that's probably the greatest thing ever, until the principal on which it's founded in voted into power and then unanimously decided to be communist and a little bit like Nazi Germany.

I think the reason my generation doesn't watch the news is because there's so little on it. The stories that ARE interesting are too short and there's no follow up. There's 20 seconds worth of something that would require an expose on. We're certanly not going to continue to do any research on it, and why should we. We're the NOW generation. We want to know about it when it happens and since we've had it handed to us anyway we want to know ALL about it. If it peaks our interest further than we will read and edit the Wiki-aritcle about it.

Caffeinated Goodness: Tits or GTFO

2011-05-16T18:29:00.000-03:00

Caffeinated Goodness: Tits or GTFO

http://ragemaker.com/

Tits or GTFO

2011-05-16T11:06:00.005-03:00

Scenario 1:
Guy and Girl walk into (Establishment Name Here).
Wild customer service personnel appears; name-tag "Steve"
Guy "Hi Steve, how are you today, I would like (insert order here)
Girl *thinking* "Awe what a sweet guy my escort is, making small talk with Steve"
What's really happening: Guy is LITERALLY making small talk and wants to be friendly while placing order.

Scenario 2:

Guy and Girl walk into (Establishment Name Here).
Wild customer service personnel appears; name-tag "Deb"
Guy "Hi Deb, I would like (insert order here)
Girl *thinking* "HE DOESN'T LOVE ME ANYMORE AND HE'S FLIRTING WITH Deb. HE WANTS TO GET INTO HER PANTS!"

What's really happening: Guy is LITERALLY making small talk and wants to be friendly while placing order.

Above is an artist rendition of Scenario 2

Women! You need to figure out that when a guy talks to a girl he does not necessarily want to get into her pants. Most guys don't assume this of you, we don't think that if you address someone by their first name you want their genitals deep inside every orifice you have, so let it be known that the same standard should apply. Unless he says something like "an order of (___________) and your phone number" he's not flirting and has only looked at the girls chest to read what's there. Pay attention!

It's Bigger Than You, and YOU are NOT me.

2011-05-14T09:41:00.000-03:00

Someone want to tell me something?

How the hell is it that we can take high resolution pictures of naked people and stream them into people's homes but we can't take similar pictures of planets and other heavenly bodies in space. We can get a closeup of someone's taint which would reveal their pores and the stubble of their ass hair but we can't for the life of us get a nice clean shot of Mars.

You can't tell me NASA doesn't have the budget for an HD camera, they send people to live in space for years at a time. The reason I'm saying this is because of shows like Ancient Aliens where they speculate about the origins of humans. Shows where they display low to medium resolution images of things that look like pyramids and faces on other planets in the solar system. If you're going to say "there's being-made (or possible-being-made) objects on other planets then wouldn't it stand to reason that you could at least take some good pictures?

I also get a kick out of being told that aliens built the pyramids. I believe that's completely true. Just don't tell the Jews. They are really committed to the lie that THEY are the ones who built them.

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On another note: I've realized something. This may sound racist but I hate Niggaz. I have no problem with Black People; some of my favourite presidents of the USA are black, I don't even have a problem with niggers (as you lovely people in "the south" call Americans of African decent) it's Niggaz that truly drive me batty. Your average Nigga may not even be black, though most are (I know, profiling). They usually wear "thay" pants somewhere in the mid calf region of "thay" legs and carry a "9" or a "gat" (cause a glock 9mm is a Gatling gun). They listen to such artists as... well I don't know what kind of music Niggaz listen to. I assume it's terrible. Probably Justin Beiber VS Weird Al or some caterwauling like that.

Here's Chris Rock to explain the difference between a Black person and a Nigga.

In The News

2011-04-29T09:28:00.000-03:00

Will and Kate got married at 3am (ADST): that's all well and good and I understand how Canada, Australia, and other commonwealth countries having an interest in who the King and Queen will be in X number of years since QEII (not the hospital or ship) probably won't live forever... it's long LIVE the queen... what I don't see is why the Americans have such an interest in it. OMG someone is getting married. That's adorable; here's the thing Americans have no real interest or stake in who is on the throne of England. Not a political one, not an economic one, NONE. To them it was just a party that was hyped by the whole world. America has been a separate and free nation from England for almost 400 years. When you have a declaration of Independence and you emancipate yourself from the mother land you no longer get to care.
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The election is coming, the election is coming...
"A retired soldier from Morell is trying to encourage more Prince Edward Islanders to cast a ballot on Monday.
Owen Parkhouse noticed that there were few lawn signs in the riding of Cardigan, so he decided to put up signs from all four parties offering in the area. A fifth sign reminds people to actually go out and vote.
Parkhouse said he was in the military for 25 years, helping to bring democracy to other countries.
"They kept on sending us to these countries where people were willing to die for a vote, and I just want to raise the awareness," he said."I've had good friends that have died in these countries trying to help them out with their democratic process, and yet you come here where you have the privilege to vote and voter turnout in the past few elections has been very low."Parkhouse said he hasn't yet decided on how he'll vote." (CBC.ca) This whole country is 35,000,000 indifferent people who bitch and moan about how little their opinion matters and then bitch and moan about who gets into office after they DIDN'T VOTE. Granted there are some people in Canada who can't vote but the people who can SHOULD! If you can vote do it. It's your right and you must exercise your rights. If 6% of the population comes out and votes and YOU'RE NOT PART OF THAT 6% than a minority of the people of this country have decided the rights for the other 94% of the country. That means your vote does matter. It means the difference between PEI getting 14 dollars or 140,000,000 dollars federally in kickbacks. Personally, I don't want 6% of the population deciding who runs this country. 6% does not necessarily represent my views on how Canada should be run. I will be voting.

By Special Request

2011-04-23T21:35:00.000-03:00

Facebook is a useful tool. It's especially useful when useless tools get on it and say things to you that cause you to simply block them and report them as spam.

But I guess it's important to mention some new rules about the internet:

1)Facebook IS real life.
1a)Since facebook is real life you cannot have friends from past chapters of your life on facebook. This is especially true if you move to another continent for any period.
1b)Should you move to another region of the world your ties to the previous region end and cannot possibly follow you because the internet does not go around the world. If you ever come back; you CANNOT possibly get those friends back or be friends of friends.

2) Josh Blizzard is a moron.There are no amendments to this rule. He has an IQ that is similar to room temperature, in Celsius. I know, it says something about me that I'm taking the time to blog about it... but I can, so I will.

3) Rule one was not intended to be a factual statement.

The wonder of having a blog is I can say what I want and if you don't want to read it you don't have to.

It's March 2011

2011-03-13T19:05:00.000-03:00

Yes kids, I didn't post much here in the past while. I've been busy. "Life is bigger than you, and you are not me..." Not having the internet at home makes it difficult to post anything on a blog as well.

I've bee watching a bit of TV. I'd say American TV but what TV station isn't American or featuring American programming these days. We're inundated with Americanism... Have I mentioned I'm not a huge fan of our neighbours to the south? With their constant insistence that the world be their way or nothing, and even going so far as to give their submarine commanders the authority to launch nuclear warheads if they lose contact with the world.

In more televisionistic news though, shows like "all worked up", "pawn stars", "operation repo", and that sort annoy and entertain me to no end. Take into consideration AWU and OR: they feature people who are in the repossession and other law enforcing professions, be it meter maid, repossession agent, process server, or security guard. These people have to deal with some of the stupidest people on the face of the planet. If you are having ANYTHING repossessed the person who took it is NOT responsible for that. They don't care about the money you're missing/ unable to whore yourself out for/ unable to get for _________________ (reason there). If you're being served with documents it's probably best to take it in stride and then deal with it like a grown up, not scream at the poor guy delivering the bad news to you. If you get a parking ticket it's probably your fault... if the ticket is in error the meter maid doesn't care PLUS chances are you are the one who's wrong. And, by the way, no parking doesn't mean "except if you're only going to be "5" minutes".

The more TV I watch the stupider the world feels. I wish 3d tv would allow me to reach into my set and slap people.

No, I'm not dead

2011-01-07T13:43:00.000-04:00

And yes I'm aware that it's been months since I've posted on here.

So what to rant about?

Well... I've learned that in 2011 people still can't drive. I wonder how they ever survived days before traffic lights. Here's a hint people; when the lights don't work it's not a free for all it's a 4 way stop and should be treated as such. Please see your provincial/ territorial/ state driving handbook for proper procedures.

In 2011 people have no idea how conscription works. CBC was doing an article about how the RCMP want drivers to call in impared motorists. One person, in their comment, compared this to a police state like Nazi Germany. I was quick to point out that it's our duty to report crimes to the police and reporting and there's nothing in the bill of rights granting freedom to drive while impared. I don't understnd the parallel between calling in an impared driver and calling in a "jew".

My passport expires 7 days before the world ends. Isn't that wierd?

Riddle Me This

2010-10-31T23:47:00.000-03:00

Where would you assume the line "... thrust her hands into his pants reaching for his cock" comes from?
A) Some disgusting "geatilmens" magazine. B) A book
If you chose either you'd be correct. The thing about it is at least men have the decency to hide their pornography in places like under the bed or in hidden folders of a computer hard drive. Women on the other hand ( the same gender who "opposes, despises, and rejects" pornography ) leave it out in the open in the form of romance novels.
I submit to you that having to search text and requiring the reader to have the abilitiy to read a language at a 6th grade level is NO different than flaunting visual stimuli with similar sexually explicit smut.
One argument is that "romance novels" have a plot. I would like to point out that some pornographic movies also have a shallow plot.
Ladies; you're beautiful and many of you are smart... however don't go off on men for looking at naked women when your whole gender has a genre of "literature" built on your masturbatory fantasies. The only difference between your smut and ours is that you have to use your imagination more.

I Never Thought of it That Way

2010-10-30T14:34:00.000-03:00

The above video (which I assume you watched in its entirety before reading this) makes sense to me. Women have this amazing ability to scream "sexual harassment" whenever they want, however could you imagine a world where a man stood up and said "she sexually harassed me" or even mentioned that they felt sexually harassed? That would be quite the day wouldn't it. Not only would it be thrown out of whatever court it was tried and the man would lose faster than he could say sex. Not only that but he'd be rediculed forever and it would go about as far for setting a precident as a touchdown goes in the world series.
Why is it okay for women to wear clothing to work that shows clevage? Why are they allowed to be alluring at work? A man can't do that, a man isn't even allowed to look. Hell we're barely allowed to say "you look nice". It's a double standard. What if a man were to wear pants that showed off his penis, or his 6 pack through his shirt? Would that be sexual harassment of women or would it be fair game as many men see it when a woman who dresses porvocativly gets leered at.
At what point is it sexual harassment of men? Can men be sexually harassed? Do men just want it? I would say; when it's unwanted sexualizatoin of a non-sexual situation, yes, and no.
Something to think about. http://www.wemen.us/ It's a mens rights site. I like it... it's interesting.

NO!

2010-10-17T22:12:00.001-03:00

Just, NO!
How the hell do you justify yourselves, AXE? Let's pretend it was a commercial where a man wanted to "get some hair action" on a woman and grabbed her; taking her from behind against a table proceeded to bury his face in her hair and molest her head. How many complaints would you get ? Why don't you consider that when you make your crappy commercials for your STANK SPRAY?
I'm a man and I'm offended by it.
Fox, and all its affiliates... FOOTBALL sucks. It should NOT superceed new episodes of GOOD shows. NO! Stop! Move all football to its own set of channels so normal people can watch good programming. Football is just the exploitation of poor videography and a chance to film a grown mans taint.
It would be nice to have good TV. You're lucky I'm ineligable to be in the arbitron/ bbm ratings.

Get An Education

2010-10-08T18:43:00.000-03:00

Highschoolers, if you're reading this, you know how your teachers are always saying go get an education past high school and you'll be successful? Well funny story; for one thing those of you with your facbook-leet-speak which makes no sense in whatever language you're bastardizing with all of those words spelled incorrectly and your 150 character misspelled sentence fragments on twitter, combined with your single digit IQ and attention span which is only measurable with cameras capable of the slow motion capture of an eye blink a lot of you WON'T get in.
There are the few and the proud of you who will make it. Some of you will take degrees like philosophy or communications and either drop out or graduate moron-cumlaude somewhere near the bottom of your class because you partied your mom and dads/ student loan money away. Good luck with your minimum wage jobs and semi-contenting call centre work while you wait for something better to come along
And there's the 25 of you per university class who will acheive your dreams... Congrats to you. You're the reason 1000 children are told everyday to be all they can be. We need more professionals like yourselves to complain about while secretly wishing we made half your anual salaries. By we I mean the ones who didn't scrape the bottom but can't quite find some way to qualify for something you might need us for.
Oh what an orwellian world we live in.

That's The Opposit of the Thing I Said

2010-09-21T09:14:00.000-03:00

I'm pretty sure I've been railing on Facebook because it's not a good thing. Having said all of those nasty things about it and how I wish it'd go away did not mean the following:

USE FACEBOOK AS A TOOL IN THE CLASSROOM!
Facebook is no more a tool than a condom is a method of transportation. When I was in school I wanted people I didn't like to know as little about me as possible. It was bad enough they picked on me at school but I didn't want them added to my "friends", now we're looking at using Facebook in the classroom. A website that literally brings your "friends" to your home through your computer. Well there were several people I didn't consider my friend and I don't remember inviting them to my house either.

Why are they using it? I don't know. Some think it can be used as a tool... as I said it's no more a teaching tool than a condom is a car. And what do we do if... well there are just so many what ifs. I'd prefer not to think about them but I'll leave them to the imagination of the reader. Philosophy isn't my thing.