One Small Transformation

Study Tools

2015-01-31T07:32:00.001-08:00

Here you will find links to many different sites that will assist you in beginning your journey to recovery after an abortion. There is a link for men as well. Study Tools

The urge to quit when the journey before us is not what we had planned for our lives.

2014-08-29T09:44:00.000-07:00

As I sat listening to T.D. Jakes this morning, his words brought to mind my sister-in-law and her battle with breast cancer. Here are his words.

' Even Jesus struggled with giving up. In the garden of Gethsemane He labored in prayer asking
God three times if He could get out of what lied before him; could He quit the plan assigned to him’ Lord is there a way I can get out of being me. Being me is not going so good. Being me is not what it’s cracked up to be. Daddy can I quit. [There is an urge in all of us to quit when the journey before us is not what we had planned for our lives. He knew that without God’s help He would not be able to finish His assignment]. Three times He prayed, “Not my will but yours”. '

Let's look at this scripture a little closer. Jesus Prays Matthew 26: 36-46

Jesus and His friends went to the garden of Gethsemane. Once there He told them to stay back while He went to another area to pray and be alone with God. He asked His friends to stay awake and keep watch with Him. He had deep anguish; the sorrow of what was to come was crushing the life out of him. He asked God if there was any way possible for Him to avoid the suffering He was about to face, could He please get out of this plan set to take place, for this plan to be changed, removed, erased? But He knew the plan for Him to suffer had a much bigger purpose than His plan to quit, or give up could ever do, so He added to His prayer, ‘don’t do this for my sake, keep me in line with your plan’. He wanted to make sure He fulfilled His purpose for coming to earth.

After an hour or so, He took a break from praying to go check on His friends, who had fallen asleep. He woke them and said, ‘ You need to wake up and pray so that you are not tested. I know you want to do what is right, but you are letting your flesh overcome you. Pray for strength against temptation.’

Then He left them to go pray some more. “My Father, if I must do this and it is not possible for me to escape it, then I pray that what you want will be done.” When he came back from praying to check on His friends, he again found them sound asleep. They simply couldn’t keep their eyes open.

This time he let them sleep on, and went back a third time to pray, going over the same ground one last time. When he came back the next time, he said, “Are you going to sleep on and make a night of it? My time is up, the Son of Man is about to be handed over to the hands of sinners. Get up! Let’s get going! My betrayer is here.” In other words, He accepted His fate. He didn’t look forward to it; however, He knew it had a bigger purpose. He was only able to face it head on because He had given it much prayer.

He could not even count on those He trusted and loved to stand beside Him. He had to go it alone. Not only was He feeling hurt and anguished but also abandoned as if no one cared what He was going through. I say to my dear Cindy, Jesus went through trials and suffering so He could relate to your feelings. He knows that you are scared and feel alone. That you are tired and hurting. He’s been there. If you can get to the point to where you can say, “Not my will but yours be done”, God will see you through just as He did his son.

Jesus is praying for you to endure this trial

2014-08-20T07:14:00.000-07:00

New post available on wordpress or use this link. http://wp.me/p4BHCi-3P

Correspondence Between the Disciple Peter and Me: Modern Day Emails

2014-08-13T10:43:00.005-07:00

New post on Wordpress. Hope you like and share it.

Snoop into my emails....You know you want to

2014-08-08T12:19:00.000-07:00

1 Peter 1: 6-9

Oh, Dear Friend,

I must say you keep me on my toes. Here you go again with the modern day acronyms. I know you have told me before but please remind me once again what 'TTYL' means. You know I am gaining in years. however, I do remember the LOL acronym and feel you may actually be doing so now. Anyway, let's get back to my reasons for writing you this letter.

Now some of what we are about to discuss may seem slightly contradictory. But bear with me and I will try to give you the examples you need to help you fully understand. The paradox of the Christian life lies in it’s peculiarity, according to MacLaren's Expositions, the physical body belongs to and is exposed to all the influences of this world and yet the spiritual man belongs to and is influenced by things unseen yet eternal. Such dramatic opposition yet this coexistence is where the secret of the Christian life lies. Consider, if you would, two seas. They “do not meet and interfere with one another, but one stream of water on the surface is running in one direction, and another below in an opposite direction. Now the Christian is like that. On the surface there is a stream of heaviness rolling with dark waves, but down in the depths there is a strong undercurrent of great rejoicing that is always flowing there” (C. H. Spurgeon.)

Consider also Nick Vujicic Born without any limbs, you could say he has faced a few trials in his life. Yet he uses his life and all it’s adversities to spread the love of Jesus. He understands that by maintaining his “central gladness” or keeping his primary focus on his future inheritance that he can face trials, yes even with JOY, and see them as merely “superficial sorrows” while here on this earth. It is this focus that sustains him and allows him to rejoice. Those without this sustaining power (non-Christians) have “superficial gladness” and “central sorrow”. (MacLaren's Expositions and Barnes' Notes on the Bible)

I do realize that Nick’s example is extreme and that most of us don’t face the trials he faces on a daily basis. But we each have our own unique set of trials. We could have struggles in our marriages, in our relationships with our children, in overcoming our past failures, in our finances, in our careers, with our health or in some combination of all of these. Whatever your current struggle is, and as difficult as it may be to endure, God has allowed it in order to build, change or adjust your character….something good WILL result from this trial.

The good from this trial will show you and the world that God knew what He was doing by allowing you to go through it. Once you come through this trial, your faith will be proven genuine.

Just as gold is put through fire to remove all the impurities, so will your faith. Gold will eventually perish but not your faith. When Jesus appears again it is your faith that will give praise, glory and honor to God because it allowed you to endure your trials . “The very gift of faith is a hint to you that you will want it, and that, at all points and in every place, you will really need it”(Spurgeon).

“Trial is the very element of faith. Faith without trial is like a diamond uncut, the brilliance of which has never been seen. Untried faith is such little faith that some have thought it no faith at all. What a fish would be without water or a bird without air, that would be faith without trial. The trial of your faith is sent to prove its sincerity, It must also be tested to prove its strength” (Spurgeon). Physically you may be grieving and suffering yet spiritually you are still able to rejoice because you know there are better things to come. If your current sufferings have somehow lessened your joy, know that it will not entirely obstruct it nor will the joy entirely deny the suffering. (Matthew Poole's Commentary)

My friend, you have never seen Jesus, and you don’t see him now yet still you love him and have faith in him. Just like wind, oxygen or gravity, you cannot see them yet you believe and trust that they will work in your life daily. This faith you have will sustain you.

Again I must close as the hours breeze by while I am writing you. I will talk to you later….ah ha….it just dawned on me what TTYL means as I have just written it. These young people creating all these acronyms are so clever. Anyway, have a blessed day and may God’s love and peace cover you today.

Dear Peter

You are not ‘gaining in age’....well maybe slightly. But who cares? Age is only a number. After all, look at you, using email now. You Go Cyber-Disciple! It is simply a matter of staying involved and that is what are you are doing. So keep at it young man....You got this...lol

No words can tell how glad and happy I am to be saved. That’s why I have faith. So often the struggles of this life are so heavy and dark I do not think I will make it through and you are right; it is the strong undercurrent that steadily flows with the reminders of what is yet to come that allows me to hang on to my joy during those trials. I have seen Nick on talk shows and heard several of his speeches. He is truly an inspiration and he exemplifies God's love so well.

I remember the days when I had “superficial gladness” and “central sorrow”. Just as I remember when it changed to “superficial sorrow” and “central gladness”. Knowing that God is simply trying to build my character and make me the person He has created me to be doesn't necessarily make it easier. But the faith that something good will result from it and that my faith will be proven genuine, does help, a little. To be honest, I wish He would get rid of the impurities with one giant fire instead of many fires that pop up unexpectedly. Then again, these little fires are tough enough, so um, I guess I take that back. No giant fire for me please.

I must admit I think both the cut and uncut diamond are both very beautiful. But with a little scrubbing, chipping and polishing the cut diamond is brilliant and can reflect light in so many more directions than the uncut diamond. I can see how working my faith, placing me in some unwanted situations, and shaping me to resemble His likeness could cause me to reflect the light of the SON more into other people's lives.

You are right Peter, just as I do not feel the need to argue the proof of wind, oxygen or gravity neither do I need to argue the proof of God’s existence. I don’t have to see Him to know He is real. I have felt his presence just as I have felt the wind. Without him working in my life daily and the faith I have in my salvation, all of these trials would be futile.

I must admit, it is so refreshing to receive your emails. Most of what comes to my inbox is simply junk mail that tries to absorb my time and energy. Your emails allow me to stop and reflect on my purpose for being here. Thank you for taking the time to mentor me and remind me of the things that are truly important in this world. I hope one day I can be the same type of mentor for others. Until next time

http://www.biblestudytools.com/commentaries/peoples-new-testament/1-peter/1.html

http://biblehub.com/sermons/1_peter/1-3.htm

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20Peter%201&version=CEV;GW;MSG;CEB;NIV

if 1 Peter were written as an email to me

2014-08-07T09:02:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to dive into the book of 1st Peter lately. Since it is written as a letter, I decided I wanted to 'rewrite' it as if it were a letter written to me. But since I would like to share my insights with you, I will begin with "Dear FRIEND"- that's me and you. The websites I use to assist me are Biblegateway.com, Biblestudytools.com, and Biblehub.com. Sometimes I can get so consumed by all there is to learn and discover that before I know it two hours have gone by and I am only two verses into a chapter. That being said I made it through five verses today. So let's dive in. (1 Peter 1:1-5)

Dear Friend

You know that I personally follow Jesus, the One I believe to be the promised deliverer of the world. This is a shared letter: first I’m writing to God’s chosen people-the Jewish Christian- who have been banned from their own country, their own home. (And second, it is for you). God has a watchful eye over you and has made a way to help you live a life dedicated to Him. You may ask, ‘what is the way?’. It is the Holy Spirit which was given to you through the sacrifice of his blood.

Ahhh, I hear you asking now, "How can the Holy Spirit help me live a life dedicated to God?" Well, let’s consider the modern day threat of different types of viruses. The germs seem to loom everywhere. By disinfecting our homes and especially our hands, we keep the virus away. Think of the viruses as sin and the Holy Spirit as the disinfectant or soap. As we kill or wash away our sin with the disinfectant we are able to remain healthy (or receive God’s grace). Grace is what changes our way of thinking to God’s way of thinking. Without the disinfectant and grace we contaminate ourselves and others. I pray that God’s grace and peace be multiplied to you.

That is a pretty amazing God we have, don't you think? We are beyond blessed to have him. After all He is the Father of our Master Jesus-the one who was risen from the dead, the one who gave us a new life, a “living” hope to carry on and a future in heaven. This new life provides an inheritance that is kept in heaven and waiting for you. It can’t be destroyed or corrupted and won’t fade away. It is your faith in God that will save you until the day He returns and allows you to receive the inheritance He has promised to you. ‘Hope’, as C.H. Spurgeon stated, ‘is what makes us seek after that which we expect to obtain {promised inheritance}’. Spurgeon continues, “ The only imperishable hope is that which climbs above the stars, and fixes itself upon the throne of God and the person of Jesus Christ.” Wow! What a picture.

{Friend I will close this email for today as it is getting late and I must accomplish more for this day. I will check for your response or any questions you may have and respond tomorrow. Have a great day in the Lord and may others see God shine through you.)

Dear Peter,

Yes, I am very aware of how dedicated you are to our Savior Jesus and I am so glad to have others to share with in our faith. It is very hard to believe that God’s chosen people have been banned from their own country. I can’t imagine what they will do, where they will go or how they must feel. The peace of knowing God is watching over them is what sustains them, I am sure. I know it is what sustains me.

It is funny how you know the questions I will ask before I even ask them. I loved your explanation of how the Holy Spirit helps us to live a dedicated life. You know how I love medical stuff and using a medical reference solidified the meaning for me. I could actually picture sin as dirt on my hands and pumping grace from the liquid soap dispenser and using cans of “Holy Spirit Lysol” to kill the viruses of sin. Loved it! Absolutely, loved it! And thank you for that blessing of grace and peace….I gladly accept it.

Yes is is so hard to imagine that the God of our savior Jesus, the God who rose Jesus from the dead, the God who gives me hope is storing treasures for me in heaven. Nothing and no one can take that away from me. Again, I love it when you provide examples to me… I am a very visual learner and they help me truly take to heart what you are trying to say to me. I can see myself climbing up the longest ladder in the world, climbing past the tree tops, past the skyscrapers, past the clouds, going deep into the stars and galaxies to grab a hold of God’s throne and saying, ‘Whew, I made it, God! Please show me the inheritance you have been holding for me...because I'm sure you know....that was one crazy climb’.

I hope you get some things accomplished today, Peter. I look forward to your email tomorrow. TTYL

Stac

http://www.biblestudytools.com/commentaries/peoples-new-testament/1-peter/1.html http://biblehub.com/sermons/auth/meyer/the_spirit_purifying_the_heart.htm

http://biblehub.com/sermons/auth/watson/the_beauty_of_grace.htm

http://biblehub.com/sermons/auth/spurgeon/a_string_of_pearls.htm

Coming Full Circle

2014-08-06T08:01:00.000-07:00

I'm writing most of my post on my Wordpress site now. Here is the link to the most current post Coming Full Circle. Hope you enjoy it. Feel free to share your thoughts.

on being fighting mad

2014-06-13T11:25:00.002-07:00

Friday, June 13, 2014

[WARNING: I AM NOT YOUR AVERAGE CHRISTIAN. I DO NOT FIT INTO SOME MOLD OF EXPECTATIONS HELD BY MOST CHRISTIAN RELIGIONS. I DO NOT BELIEVE IN RELIGION IN AND OF ITSELF. I BELIEVE SOLELY IN THE BIBLE AND TRUST WHAT IT HAS TO SAY TO ME. I CHOSE TO FELLOWSHIP IN A SANCTUARY OF BELIEVERS UNDER THE TITLE OF ASSEMBLIES OF GOD; BUT THAT IS NOT WHO I AM . I AM SIMPLY A CHRISTIAN DEFINED BY THE BIBLE, NOT DOCTRINES. YOU ARE WARNED BECAUSE I AM LIKELY TO OFFEND SOME WITH THIS POST. THAT IS NOT MY INTENT. MY DECLARATION IS MADE PUBLIC AS A WARNING TO SATAN.]

Today my worst nightmare has been confirmed…. (this song popped into my head) “my past keeps playing with my head, failure strikes medown again, I’m reminded of the wrong, that I have said and done, and thatdevil just won’t let me forget”… The insanity set forth to destroy my life has shown me the grip it has on someone dear to me and my inability to undo it, proving once again I have failed…

My emotions are mixed. I’m mad at myself for letting my guard down when I knew better. I’m angry at God because I trusted Him to do what I couldn’t. I am beyond pissed at Satan…I can hear his snarly-ass snickering with an evil grin smeared across his face that I would love to slap off. Unfortunately it is not “flesh and blood I wrestle against, but principalities, against powers, rulers of darkness and spiritual host of wickedness “(Eph 6:12). He is just hoping this is one more setback in my life that will finally make me cave and stop trusting God to see me through. The saying, “I’m going to beat the hell out of you” has never been truer than now and if only God would give me the opportunity and power to do it. I would take Satan on single handedly if I knew Jesus didn’t already have it covered. (Satan doesn’t want me to pull out all my UFC moves- I keep them hidden for a reason). So many more emotions tied up within my stomach…. I’m not even going to describe or discuss. Doing so simply elevates Satan instead of Christ, the one I want elevated

So , Satan, I declare WAR on you this day, it is time for you and all your cronies to be on guard. I have a sword you WILL NEVER defeat. It was given to me to “whoop dattaaa” [watch Meet the Browns you will know what I’m saying]….and “whoop” is being nice… You’ve chosen this battle but I am not sure you remember who you are coming against. It is not I that has and will continue to defeat you but Jesus (1John 4:4) However, the leader of this army has CHOSEN ME (Eph 1:4-5). So guess whose side I’m on??? - THE WINNING SIDE- and guess what that makes me… a winner too. BOOYA!!!!

I AM a child of THE KING (Gal.4:4-7) sealed with more promise than I have even yet to learn (Eph. 1:13). I am the head and not the tail (Deut. 28.13). You, are the tail, (Isa. 9:15) the one who teaches lies and is the father of ALL lies. (John 8:44) Maybe you have forgotten Jesus has destroyed your power against me, since I am one filled with the Holy Spirit (Col. 2:15), an overcomer (1 John 4:4), a believer equipped to perform great works that will glorify MY HEAVENLY FATHER (John 14: 12-14)

I will not be defeated. The Commander and Chief of the army I serve will never let me down, always stick beside me and PROTECT me from evil. (2 Thes. 3:3). I live and move in him; I can’t get away from him (Acts 17:26). Through Jesus, I have already been given the victory (1 Cor 15:57).

You … demand proof that Christ speaks throughme, [believe me, you] will get more than you bargained for. You’ll get the fullforce of Christ, don’t think you won’t. He was sheer weakness and humiliationwhen he was killed on the cross, but oh, he’s alive now—in the mighty power ofGod! [I wasn’t] much to look at, either, when [I was] humiliated [by] you, butwhen [I] deal with you this next time; I’ll be alive in Christ, AND strengthened by God. (The Message Bible) My UFC (United For Christ) moves are out!You have been warned. I am not lying down and I am no easy target.

THE BIBLE WAS GIVEN TO ME BY A MIGHTY GOD AS A SWORD THAT I HAVE PICKED UP AND PLAN TO SWING LIKE A CRAZY PERSON UNTIL I FEEL THE NEED TO REGAIN MY SANITY…UNTIL THEN MARK MY WORDS: This is my bible: I have what it says I have. I am what it says I am. I am CONFIDENT not intimidated, meek or insecure, STRONG and not weak, FOCUSED and not scattered, ABOVE and not below, THE HEAD and not the tail, A LEADER not a follower, SUCCESSFUL not a failure, more than a CONQUEROR; EQUIPPED, EMPOWERED, WELL-ABLED to ACCOMPLISH my dreams and GOD’S PLANS FOR ME. GOD STANDS BESIDE ME, GOES BEFORE ME AND PREPARES MY WAY

....on surviving a snake bite- I know, only me...

2014-05-27T11:20:00.003-07:00

Ophidiophobia -the fear of snakes. I definitely have this now so more than ever!

So I have lived in the boondocks now for over 14 years. I have always worried about snakes and spiders biting me or a family member and I have attempted to take the necessary precautions to prevent that from happening. At times this has meant running from them as they slither sneakily across my yard- only to remember I was leaving my child behind. Not good, I know! But she is fine, safe, nothing happened to her, I promise- just heat failure for me.

I have thrown rocks at them, chopped them with a hoe or ran over them with my car. I always look where I'm stepping when walking in the grass or wear crocs that look like Sweden wooden shoes (not the ones with holes in them) for added protection.My philosophy is the only good snake is a dead snake and after Tuesday night that will be my motto for life. Did you know, according to WebMD, “a dead snake, even one with a severed head, can still bite and release venom by reflex action for up to 90 minutes after it dies.”

Here’s my story for all those that have been curious: on 5/20/14 my daughter and I returned home from watching Moms Night Out - a hilarious must see for everyone; you will not be disappointed. It was about 10pm when we pulled into the driveway. I gathered my stuff and as I was about even with her tire I felt an extremely sharp puncture to my right foot. I wanted to think it was a piece of metal but I knew, that I knew, that I knew that it was definitely not a piece of metal. I didn't want to look but knew I had to. So when I did, I saw the scrawny, evil -eyed monster ready to strike again and I jumped forward so I could lean on the hood of the car. Now my scream occurred simultaneously with all the thoughts that were racing through my brain, to which my daughter responded "WHAT?" in her death rattling response. I replied, "Go get your dad, I've been bitten by a snake,"

I heard the echoes of her calls to her dad as she ran to the back of the house to awaken him from a sound sleep. While awaiting his presence, the thoughts that raced through my head were "I am a nurse, what do I do, ...I do not know what to do....shouldn't I know what to do....stay calm, don't move, ...why don't I know what to do....stay calm...if I squeeze above my ankle will that slow the circulation,....should I elevate my leg to decrease circulation, ...I know it's important to stay calm and don't move… STAY CALM.

When Jamie arrived- in his under roo’s--the snake long sincee has gone bye-bye- thank God-& I'm leaning there on the hood of the car, my crap scattered on the ground around me, hanging on to my ankle with both hands, and my leg held up in the air- likely looking like a ballerina. (Do you have this picture in your head). I told him to get dressed and take me to the hospital. Courtney was trying to be helpful and asked what she should do. I had her pick up my stuff and take it into the house. I later found out she was freaking out to have to bend down with a snake lurking around there somewhere.

Jamie returned in a panic, still trying to wake up. He scooped me up and carried me to the truck. Let's just say it was a -musical strain, um … walk...as he carried me. The fear of not knowing what to do kept me from laughing at him and his unexpected musical serenade but now I can barely type this without cracking a rib. Courtney brought me an ice pack and T-shirt to wrap around it. Jamie drove about 80-90 to the hospital. As he drove I called a doctor I used to work with to see if I should use the ice or not. She had never dealt with snake bites before so she didn't know. I called my friend that worked in the ER and she didn't know. So I felt better that I wasn't the only medical person that didn't know what to do.

We arrived at Kennett hospital about 10:15. They took vitals, and drew some blood. Watched me for about 2 hours, gave me a dose of keflex and sent me home. Once home and in bed- around 1, I told Jamie the inside of my leg felt like a giant bruise. This is what I awakened to this the next morning. See picture.

And it was very painful and tender. After attempting to get up and learning that walking was not going to occur to day, I laid back on the bed, began to cry like a baby, and texted my mother to come over. PPLLLEEEAAASSSEEEE In the mean time, I lowered myself to the floor, to figure out how I was going to get to the bathroom. Having hardwood floors, crawling on my knees was not an option, so I sat on my butt and pulled myself backwards to the bathroom to attempt to start my day. While scooting backwards, if I came across anything I felt I might need throughout the day, I piled it in my lap. So needless to say by the time I made it to the bathroom, I had a pile of books in my lap and my floor was getting very clean. (Again, do you have this picture in your head).

Mom drove me to a follow-up appointment I made with a NP friend of mine in Blytheville. The first thing she did was call poison control- poison control was not called the night before; they questioned her as to why they had not been called for which she had no answer. (Hence this is the reason I go to NP’s- I’ve found they tend to follow protocol. I have some great Drs. and great Dr. friends but I prefer to see NP’s on a regular basis). Anyway, by the time I arrived to her office, the area on my leg had increased slightly size. (see picture below)

Poison control instructed her to take me to the ER, have them draw more labs and monitor me for awhile. I called my husband to have him come up there with me. He was scared to death; he even called the pastor to pray for me. I tried to tell him I wouldn’t die that easily but he wouldn’t listen. (Glad he loves me though). I stayed there a couple more hours. Labs were still normal with only a slightly elevated prothrombin time (PT). A PT test, along with other labs, are used to determine how long it takes blood to clot. Snake venom can cause bleeding concerns. I was discharged once again and told to return if my whole leg turned blue or if I had difficulty breathing.

Here are some pictures of the progression of how my leg changed over the next 48 hours or so. Remember this is the inside of my right thigh and my beautiful Fiona foot (Fiona-from Shrek) below. Luckily, as you can see, only one fang punctured my foot. It appears that the other fang must have hit the strap of my flip-flop

According to the Missouri Department of Conservation (MDC) when it comes to snake bites one of the most important factors is personal sensitivity. Some people are more allergic to snake venom, just as some people have a more serious reaction to insect stings. Snake bites are more serious for very young and very old people and those with compromised health. The location of the bite is important, too. Least serious are those to the hands and feet, which is good because that’s where most people are bitten. I had what was considered a large, local reaction which can take up to 10 days to improve.

5/26/14

So what did I learn from all of this:

1. Use a flashlight when I get out of the car at night. Snakes do NOT care that it is MY driveway, nor are they in a hurry to move when a vehicle pulls up in the driveway. I thought the vibration from a vehicle would keep them out of the driveway, and never dreamed one would be there.

2. Just because I’m a nurse doesn’t mean I have to know how to treat everything. Because snake bites are rare, most medical personnel are unfamiliar with the protocol. I did some things right: Remained calm, kept extremity as still as possible, went to the emergency room. If you don’t use the skills you learn, you lose them. This was only my second exposure to a snake bite and the other one was during my 1st year as a nurse.

3. What not to do for a snake bite: do not apply ice; do not apply tourniquet -some pressure will decrease circulation but do not occlude circulation. Elevation is controversial so it’s best to keep the extremity at the level of the heart. (Decreased elevation leads to increased swelling and possibly compartment syndrome; increased elevation leads to increased circulation to the heart.)

4. Most people bitten by a snake do not receive antivenom.

5. Allergic reactions depends upon the individual’s sensitivity to venom. (Guess I’m sensitive)

6. Call poison control immediately

6.Snakebite ranks just above falling space debris as a threat to human life. (MDC) Guess I should have played the lottery that day.

I'm still improving each day. Today is one week, so I expect complete recovery before the weekend. Another tally mark for Jesus….Satan you should know better by now, My God has plans for me. Why can't you comprehend that!!!

Now if only I could just stop seeing “snakes” everywhere I go….or at least everything initially looks like a snake which is enough to make me jump on your shoulders. Be prepared...

....on being a Mother

2014-05-12T09:51:00.000-07:00

Monday May 12

Yesterday was Mother’s day. Before church I was looking through an old prayer journal and found when I dedicated my marriage and both Cody & Courtney back to you. I wrote,

“I dedicate my marriage to you Lord that you could use us as examples to

our families and children ...through our trials you will show us you have

the answers. I thank you now for all the blessings you will give us and the

tribulations that you will see us through. I dedicate [Cody & Courtney] to

you….Lead me and Jamie to teach and raise them according to your word…

with every illness & every trial [they face], you will remind us that they are

yours and that you are allowing those circumstances to occur [for a reason]

....through your strength and power, Lord, we will make it through [anything

we must face].”

Our church had baby dedication yesterday as well. It was nice to come across that entry in my journal and then watch an official ceremony right after it. I know that when I dedicated Courtney on that 4th day of June in 1998, it was very emotional for me. We lived in Southaven, Ms. She was nineteen months old.

I believe it was as hard for me to ‘give her away’ then as it will be for her dad to walk her down the wedding aisle (not anytime soon). I remember I was crying and thinking I do not know if the world would have a savior today if it had been left up to me to let my son die on the cross. I was only giving her back to Him by my word, I was not offering her life on a cross. Having a type A personality, and not one to easily relinquish control, I felt as if I was physically handing her over to someone else. And it hurt deeply...strange I know, but true.

In 1 Samuel it begins with Elkanah who is married to Hannah and Peninnah. Peninnah had many children by Elkanah and Hannah was unable to have any. Penninah would “provoke her [Hannah] in order to irritate her” until she wept and refused to eat. (v 6-7) Elkanah could not understand why she allowed Penninah’s words to hurt her so bad. He felt his presence should have been enough to fill the void she had concerning not having children. [He just didn’t get it]. Hannah wept and poured out her soul to the Lord and she made a vow saying, “ O Lord Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the Lord for all the days of his life and no razor will ever be used on his head.”

I know how Hannah felt. Prior to Courtney, I had lost three babies and desperately wanted a child of my own. Shortly after learning I was pregnant, I began spotting and was immediately placed on bedrest for what seemed like forever- 1st trimester. It was during that time that I promised God if He would just give me this one child, I would do everything in my power to raise her according to His word - not religion- and that when He instructed me to, I would give her back to Him.

So that day in Southaven, when I knew He was prompting me to give her back, I wept as hard as I did the day I begged to keep her. But He had kept His promise by allowing me to hold her in my arms and love her the best I knew how and now it was my turn to keep my promise. At the time I was giving (dedicating) her back to God, I did not know how much peace it would offer me down the road. The times I felt powerless over her life, I would remind Him that she was His and it was His responsibility to protect her when I couldn’t.

I did my best to teach her about the Word of God and show her how God moved in our family and our lives. I knew I had to let her wings break out of the cocoon on their own- with Him watching- not me prying them open in an effort to only assist. Jamie and I have been able to go on trips without her and without being 'scared' something would happen. I do not think I would have had the peace to take any overnight trip without her if I had not given her back to Him.

When she faces struggles, I try so hard not to interfere. I try to remind her that we do not know why God is allowing her to go through the trials she faces, but she needs to trust Him to use them for His glory. I've tried to teach her to do all she can about any situation she faces and trust God to do the rest- especially with test [like algebra..uugh]. She is a lot like her mother with wanting to be 'perfect' in all she does. I am so very proud of her for achieving and doing her best, I am still working on helping her to celebrate her accomplishments, the baby steps that take her to her goals. She just wants to achieve the goals in a zap-uugghh the microwave society we live in.

I am so blessed to be a mom and after begging to be one, I don't want to take it for granted. I know there are many that longed for that job title and for some reason God didn't allow it to happen. I pray for those that God will give you comfort and peace about it and one day hopefully you will have your answer as to why He didn’t allow it to come to pass. Working in the field of pediatrics for over 8 years, I have often questioned God as to why He chooses to 'allow' some to have children that will simply throw them in the trash and not those who would do anything to rescue that one from the trash.

All of this to say, I am blessed and God has given me the Greatest gift I could have asked for in her. Despite all our disagreements, moments of anger toward each other, and days of not liking each other, there is nothing in this world I wouldn’t do for her if I could. Unfortunately, I’m not always allowed to. I have accepted my responsibility of not doing some of those things, when God tells me not to- I don’t know who cries more me or her- but those are stories for another day. I love you Courtney, you have made me one proud mom!

Let Them See You in Me

2014-05-07T06:50:00.001-07:00

My Prayer

"Let Them See You"

Take away the melodies
Take away the songs I sing
Take away all the lights
And all the songs You let me write
Does the man I am today
Say the words You need to say

Let them see You
In me
Let them hear You
When I speak
Let them feel You
When I sing
Let them see You
Let them see You
In me

Who am I without Your grace
Another smile, another face
Another breath, a grain of sand
Passing quickly through Your hand
I'd give my life, an offering
Take it all, take everything

Let them see You
In me
Let them hear You
When I speak
Let them feel You
When I sing
Let them see You
Let them see You
In me

With every breath I breathe
I sing a simple melody
But I pray they'll hear more than a song
In me, in me

Let them see You
In me
Let them hear You
When I speak
Let them feel You
When I sing
Let them see You

Oh, let them see You
In me
Let them hear You
When I speak
Let them feel You
When I sing
Let them see You
Just let them see You in me
Let them see You

Your Vision Determines Your Direction

2014-05-05T06:04:00.000-07:00

[The link to the Legacy sermon- is last week's sermon. This weeks sermon is not posted yet]

So yesterday I did not go to church due to a busy weekend that prevented me from completing all the necessary task that needed to be accomplished. We were having a baptismal service in the park in the afternoon so I wanted to be completed with my tasks so that I could attend that without thinking about what was still left undone. Our church -Wellspring- airs the services online, so I planned to watch on my computer.
As often times occurs living in the country, my internet decides when it wants to work. And of course it would not work at all during the first service. Since I could not complete my tasks-most of which were online and I could not watch the service I decided to finish the last few chapters of Isaiah and cut out encouraging words for my journal page.
Low and behold, it was as if the devil said, "Well crap, if she is going to study the bible anyway, I may as well let the internet work". And it began to work just as praise and worship was ending during second service. I had already finished what I was study and here are the encouraging words and images I had already cut out for my journal entry.

Then Pastor Paul began to preach on the sermon series "Legacy". He used Genesis 15: 1-5 as his reference and stated your vision determines your direction. That is what I was focusing on prior to hearing his vision. You can't see in this picture what I have written in the upper left hand corner. "Increase in [studying] God's Word. Expansion is inevitable with daily visits". After Pastor Paul's message I added "Look up!" in the top right corner. I don't want to take away from his message so go check it out. I just thought it was neat that I was on the same track- or at least felt like I was. And my focus for my journal entry was going to be on my vision for my future.

In a Rut, but Called, Cared For & not Disappointed

2014-05-01T09:01:00.000-07:00

I hate it when I get in a rut. Sometimes when I read the bible, I feel like I’m just going through the motions. That is the main reason I try so hard to figure out how it applies to me. I feel like I have been in Isaiah forever and that it will never end. I think that is mainly because it is so difficult to grasp and apply to my own life. I will likely finish Chapter 49-there are only 5 more verses- and then venture on to something new for awhile. I will return to finish Isaiah at a later date. But next week, it will be something new.

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY Isaiah 49:22 This is what the Sovereign Lord says:“See, I will beckon to the nations, I will lift up my banner to the peoples;they will bring your sons in their arms and carry your daughters on their hips.23 Kings will be your foster fathers, and their queens your nursing mothers.They will bow down before you with their faces to the ground; they will lick the dust at your feet.Then you will know that I am the Lord; those who hope in me will not be disappointed.”

*MY INTERPRETATION: I encourage all to follow me. They will see the sign I show you and THEY will gather up your children and bring them back to where I have called you. The rulers of the land will look after you and meet your needs. They will greet you with respect and be humble before you- I’m not too sure what to think about “licking the dust”...not sure if that is literal or figurative...any bible scholars out there that can elaborate?- By these things you will know that I am the Lord and by placing your hope in me you will not be disappointed.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

I did a little research myself on Bible Hub to have a clearer understanding of the passage at hand.. According to the Matthew Henry Commentary God can and will use others to return the Israelite s to their home. According to the Pulpit Commentary and depending on the version of the bible used the word “Nations” and “Gentiles” are used interchangeably. I like how it is stated in the Living Bible Isaiah 49:22 Living Bible (TLB) 22 The Lord God says, “See, I will give a signal to the Gentiles, and they shall carry your little sons back to you in their arms, and your daughters on their shoulders. So they- the Gentiles, will bring the children - or new converts (likely Jews and Gentiles)-back to Jerusalem and the Gentiles will be adopted (fostered) into the family. As a part of the family they should be nurtured, cared for and respected. When you see these things happening you will know there is only one God and you will not be disappointed for having placed your hope in Him.

So this is my take away from this passage: I have been called-for whatever reason; I am cared for and I will not be disappointed for placing my hope in the Lord- Jesus Christ!

What did you take from it?

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED: beckon make a gesture with the hand, arm, or head to encourage someone to come nearer or follow banner synonyms: sign, placard, poster, notice foster care for, take care of, look after nursing feed; bow an act of bending the head or upper body as a sign of respect or greeting

"REALLY"...EVEN BACK IN THE DAY?

2014-04-29T04:56:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 49:20-21

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY -20 The children born during your bereavement will yet say in your hearing,‘This place is too small for us; give us more space to live in.’21 Then you will say in your heart, ‘Who bore me these?I was bereaved and barren; I was exiled and rejected. Who brought these up?I was left all alone, but these—where have they come from?’”

*MY INTERPRETATION: While you are in the midst of mourning over a lost love one, your children will have the nerve to complain about their living space and request more. You will ask yourself, “where did these children come from? I feel as if I am the one who is dead and rejected. Did I raise these children to act like this? I feel so alone and yet these children….they surely are not the children I raised.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

How many times has my Mom asked herself this question? We-her children- have led her down this path one too many times. Now that we are parents, we have experienced those same emotions. I do not know how many times I have stated to my husband, “we did not raise her to be that way! Why does she act like that?” Well, obviously it is nothing new. If it occurred over 2000 years ago and was significant enough to leave it’s mark in the bible, then it was significant enough to inform us we are not in this alone. I don’t really know that that is a good thing or that it is even very reassuring, though. Nevertheless, eventually we look at those offspring of ours in pure amazement, with jaws hanging to the ground and the only thing we can think of is, "REALLY?"

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED: bereaved be deprived of a loved one through a profound absence, especially due to the loved one's death. barren bleak and lifeless exiled expel and bar (someone) from their native country, typically for political or punitive reasons. rejected dismiss as inadequate

Only Deployed...Not Abandoned or Forgotten

2014-04-15T07:02:00.002-07:00

I would love to hear your feedback. Please leave a comment.

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY Isaiah 49: 13 Shout for joy, you heavens; rejoice, you earth; burst into song, you mountains!For the Lord comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.14 But Zion said, “The Lord has forsaken me, the Lord has forgotten me.”15 “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! forgotten. 16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me. 17 Your children hasten back, and those who laid you waste depart from you. 18 Lift up your eyes and look around; all your children gather and come to you. As surely as I live,” declares the Lord, “you will wear them all as ornaments; you will put them on, like a bride.

*MY INTERPRETATION: May excitement be evident all around, in the heavens, on the earth, up to the mountain top. Those who belong to the Lord, will be comforted because He is concerned about your pain and sufferings. The Place in Jerusalem where the city of David was built stated God had abandoned and forgotten them, comparing their relationship with God to that of a mother and a newborn. Stating although they felt forgotten, they would never forget about Him. To prove He has not forgotten them, He shows them His hands where He has engraved them. He reminds them that He is continuously focused on them. He reminds them of how their children returned home and their enemies left them. He instructs them to look around and see how their family is all together and that their children would make them proud.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

Abandoned and forgotten. Sometimes when God doesn't answer my cry when I think He should, that is exactly how I feel. Have you ever been there? Despite the fact, I have many reasons to be proud of and to know He hasn't forgotten me, it is during those times when that the pain or trouble I’m experiencing has greater power over me than His love for me.

And that is exactly what the enemy would have me to think. He has intentions for my life just as God has plans for my life. If he can keep my focus off what I know is true- that God is for me, that He is always thinking about me, that He protects me and that He has given me many things to be proud of-then he has had a successful day. Our spiritual warfare occurs as a result of an intentional arrangement by an enemy of God and His children. We must be intentional in engaging in that warfare and get ready to face enemy resistance daily. I love what Stormie Omartian says in her book Prayer Warrior

“This is a spiritual battle. It is every bit as real as the fleshly battles waged on earth today, but in a spiritual war the way you do battle is to pray...God’s army is the only one where you can be deployed but you don't actually have to go anywhere. Your heart will be deployed to wherever God sends you in prayer.”

Are you ready to accept your deployment papers today?

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED:

afflicted (of a problem or illness) cause pain or suffering to; affect or trouble.

compassion concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others.

forsaken abandoned or deserted.:

ornaments make (something) look more attractive

Sometimes waiting is for a reason...

2014-04-10T09:19:00.000-07:00

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY

Isaiah 49:7-9 12- This is what the Lord says— the Redeemer and Holy One of Israel—to him who was despised and abhorred by the nation, to the servant of rulers: “Kings will see you and stand up, princes will see and bow down , because of the Lord who is faithful, the Holy One of Israel, who has chosen you .” 8 This is what the Lord says: “In the time of my favor I will answer you, and in the day of salvation I will help you;I will keep you and will make you to be a covenant for the people,to restore the land and to reassign its desolate inheritances. 9 to say to the captives,‘Come out,’ and to those in darkness, ‘Be free! ’“They will feed beside the roads and find pasture on every barren hill. 10 They will neither hunger nor thirst, nor will the desert heat or the sun beat down on them.He who has compassion on them will guide them and lead them beside springs of water.11 I will turn all my mountains into roads, and my highways will be raised up. 12 See, they will come from afar— some from the north, some from the west, some from the region of Aswan.”

*MY INTERPRETATION: This is what the Lord of Israel had to say to the ones He gave his life for, to the ones He is dedicated. To those who are despised and regarded with disgust by other nations, he says ‘You will be noticed, and exalted by those in high positions. Simply because I am unchanging, loyal and devoted [to you] but mainly because I have chosen you.

It is because of my kindness that I will reply [to your situation] on the day you are delivered from your sin. I will make it easy for you. I will keep you and make you the promise for others to see. When you return, you will be given back your land as well as some of the deserted land (now flourishing).

I will say to those held prisoner “come out” and to those deep in their sin “be free”. Food and beauty will abound wherever you go or look. What was once without life will now be multiplied. No one will hunger,thirst, or suffer from the heat. I will guide you and meet all your needs. I will remove obstacles before you get to them. See all my people are coming home”.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE [I have been stuck in this passage for what seems like two weeks now. I feel this sometimes happens because God his holding me in that particular piece of passage to show me something at an appointed time. There have been so many of these times while reading Isaiah, that this has seemed to happen to me. I try not to get discourage and simply wait for the Holy Spirit to reveal whatever it is my soul needs to receive. So here it is finally. I hope it speaks to you as well.

This is what the Lord spoke to me, I am the one He gave his life for, I am the one He is dedicated..When I am despised and hated by others, he reminds me that he has a plan -I will be noticed and elevated to higher positions simply because he has chosen me. He is loyal and devoted to me [because I have chosen to be a Christ follower]. The day I made the decision to follow him is the day I accepted the devotion He had already promised to me.

He will send answers to help me make decisions, He will protect me from harm. My life will be an example of his promises when he rights the wrongs that have been against me and restores me; when he gives me that which was once abandoned but is now flourishing; when he uses me to help others break free from bondage, when he uses me to be a light to help others see restoration is possible. It is because of his compassion that I lack for nothing, that I have been protected, that I am led and continually replenished. He is the one directing my path. I simply have to take the steps. When I am not afraid to move out in obedience, and do what He has called me to do, others will follow the Christ I serve.

The Same God

2014-03-24T05:06:00.000-07:00

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY Isaiah 493 He said to me, “You are my servant, Israel, in whom I will display my splendor.” 4 But I said, “I have labored in vain; I have spent my strength for nothing at all. Yet what is due me is in the Lord’s hand, and my reward is with my God.” 5 And now the Lord says— he who formed me in the womb to be his servant to bring Jacob back to him and gather Israel to himself, for I am honored in the eyes of the Lord and my God has been my strength —6 he says: “It is too small a thing for you to be my servant to restore the tribes of Jacob and bring back those of Israel I have kept.I will also make you a light for the Gentiles,(non-Jewish) that my salvation may reach to the ends of the earth.”

*MY INTERPRETATION: (A conversation between the Lord and Isaiah) “You are my servant, my personal attendant. I will show others you are not ordinary by no means.”. Isaiah replied, “I have struggled for no reason; I have depleted everything within me for nothing. Up until this moment, you’ve held on to all I deserve and You are the only one that even knows it.” The Lord responds, “ the one who created me inside my mother to be His personal assistant, to gather and bring Israel back to Him, He has honored and strengthened me. Him, that One, is the One who asks you, ‘ ‘is it beneath you to assist me in reinstating Israel’s (those who I have protected) back to their previous right, to their homeland?’ (I am telling you that) You will also help the non-Jewish people understand they too can be delivered from sin & it’s consequences up until the point that the earth is no more.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

I am called to assist God personally and to stand out from others. At times, I will feel as if my struggles to stand out or be different or not conform to my surroundings, have been for nothing and quiet frankly, not worth the effort. But I KNOW, it is through those moments that you will validate me because you know the struggles I have faced.

You will remind me that the same God who created Jesus to assist him in bringing Israel back to Him, the One who honored and strengthen Jesus, is the same God asking me if I think I am above helping in the same request? Is it beneath me to remind Jews, their promise land is waiting for them? Can I not take the time to tell the non-Jews they can avoid the consequences of sin by accepting my deliverance? Surely God is not asking too much of me, if he made the same request to His Son.

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED: servant a person who performs duties for others, esp. a person employed in a house on domestic duties or as a personal attendant.. display make a prominent exhibition of (something) in a place where it can be easily seen.: exhibit, show; splendor magnificent and splendid appearance; grandeur; impressiveness, luxury, fineness, glory, beauty, elegance (not ordinary,simple or modest) labored done with great effort and difficulty.strained, difficult, forced ,laborious, slave away, struggle, strive, work like a dog; vain spent having been used and unable to be used again, consumed, exhausted, depleted; strength state of being strong Yet up until the present or a specified or implied time; by now or then.; due a person's right; what is owed to someone. rightful treatment, fair treatment, just punishment in that is or appears to be enclosed or surrounded by something else. inside, within, in the middle of; reward a thing given in recognition of one's service, effort, or achievement, prize, award, bonus, gift payment light understanding of a problem or mystery; (enlightenment- .give (someone) greater knowledge and understanding about a subject or situation, inform, tell, make aware, open someone’s eyes, notify)salvation deliverance from sin and its consequences, reach stretch out, hold out, extend, outstretch,ends a final part of something,conclusion, termination, ending, finish, close

Isaiah 49:1-2 Are you in a funk, over a funk or entering a funk?

2014-03-19T05:59:00.000-07:00

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY Isaiah 49: 1-Listen to me, you islands; hear this, you distant nations: Before I was born the Lord called me; from my mother’s womb he has spoken my name. 2 He made my mouth like a sharpened sword, in the shadow of his hand he hid me; he made me into a polished arrow and concealed me in his quiver *DEFINITIONS REVIEWED: islands: (those isolated); distant: (reserved, unapproachable); Before: (in preparation for, anticipation /expectation of); spoken: (past participle of speak, which is to talk, to talk means others can hear what’s spoken); sharpened: ability to cut(remove (something) from something larger )/pierce(penetrate); shadow: a dark area or shape produced by a body coming between rays of light and a surface.; hid: put or keep out of sight; conceal from the view or notice of others; polished:shiny as a result of being rubbed move one's hand or a cloth repeatedly back and forth on the surface of (something) with firm ; pressure accomplished; arrow: a shaft with a pointed head at one end and often flight-stabilizing (no fluctuations) vanes at the other, meant to be shot from a bow; concealed: (hid, covered, kept secret, out of sight, invisible); quiver: (an archer's portable case for holding arrows)/ arsenal: arsenal, quiver of ready responses..

*MY INTERPRETATION: (Isaiah speaking) Those of you who have isolated yourselves and those who are unapproachable pay attention. For I was called by the Lord before I was born even while I was still in my mothers womb he spoke (so other’s heard it) my name. He gave me the ability to speak words that caused others to remove from their life that which was unpleasing to the Lord. Consider how small I am to him: he was able to hide me(conceal from others view) with the shadow of his hand. With continuous, firm pressure, he created in me the ability to penetrate hearts, without fluctuating and all the while he hid me in his arsenal for use at the perfect time.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

There are times that I prefer being alone and choose to stay away from others. During those times, I’m seen as distant, withdrawn or unsociable. I don't enjoy those times for that is not the person I want to be nor is it a person God can use to build his kingdom. But God knows I will get in those ruts and he already has it planned whom he will send to speak to me during those times. That someone will speak into my life the words I need to get out of my funk. My concerns are not too much for him. Think about it: if he has someone ready to help me BEFORE I actually need it, surely whatever has put me in that funk is no match for him.

On the other hand, just as he has someone to help me when I am in the dumps, at times, I am the person he uses to help others. But being that person requires me to go through an on-going, physical process. It is through my own trials that I gain the stability required to force my way into other’s lives in order to be the help they need for that moment. I’m like his bag of magic tricks, he waits for just the right time to use them so they will be most effective. And so are you. You are either in a funk, over a funk or entering a funk. Just know that whichever one it is, it won't last and it has a purpose.

ANALYZE YOUR PAST, YOUR PURPOSE & YOUR PLAN

2014-03-10T14:09:00.000-07:00

*THE SCRIPTURE USED TODAY

Isaiah 43: 26-28

26 Review the past for me, let us argue the matter together; state the case for your innocence. 27 Your first father sinned; those I sent to teach you rebelled against me. 28 So I disgraced the dignitaries of your temple; I consigned Jacob to destruction[a] and Israel to scorn. Footnotes: Isaiah 43:28 The Hebrew term refers to the irrevocable giving over of things or persons to the Lord, often by totally destroying them.

*DEFINITIONS REVIEWED

Definitions: (I choose to look up certain words that I feel could have more meaning than my current understanding of them or that could make more sense to me if I had a different or more current word)

1. Review: examin with possibility or intention of instituting change if necessary; look over; study; examine again; analysis

2. Argue: put forth reason for or against debate; prove reasoning; give evidence of ; persuaded; influence; insist

3. rebelled: rise in opposition to established government ruler; revolt, Riot, take up arms; be insubordinate

4. Disgraced: bring shame upon; discredit; treat with disfavor; rebuke, humiliate; fallen from favor; degrade; taint; stain

5. dignitaries: person of high rank, position or office

*MY INTERPRETATION

26 ANALYZE YOUR PAST THEN LETS LOOK FOR THE ACTIONS THAT COULD PROVE YOUR BLAMELESSNESS. 27 YOUR PREVIOUS GENERATIONS SINNED; THEN I SENT MORE TO TEACH YOU THE TRUTH AND YET THEY WERE REBELLIOUS & UNDISCIPLINED AS WELL 28 SO I HUMILIATED -completely destroyed-THE LEADERS OF YOUR COMMUNITY.

*MY RESEARCH & REFLECTIONS OF THE PASSAGE APPLIED TO MY LIFE

Stacey, carefully evaluate your past and then let’s understand your actions and see if they prove you to be blameless (I doubt they will.. ;/ EEKS). The family that came before you- even as far back to Abraham & Adam- have sinned so I -have continued to send- others to teach you the truth. Yet they, too were rebellious and undisciplined. I humiliated-or completely destroyed- the religious leaders of your community. Previously protected from my wrath because of their position, I have stripped them of their duties and allowed them to experience the same treatment as common people.

What should I do with the information I gain as a result of analyzing my past? If I recognize that I am doing the same and failing miserably by not providing the other’s with the truth of God’s word, then I need to

1. remind God of the promises that he made to me and the sacrifice that Jesus made FOR me so that I may avoid the same feat of the dignitaries. “In Matthew Henry’s Concise commentary it’s stated: Plead these -[his promises]- with him [when] wrestling for pardon; and declare these things, that thou mayest be justified freely by his grace. This is the only way, and it is a sure way to peace.”

2. I should ‘go & sin no more’; do as I am commanded to do and love people; because that is His greatest commandment.

But why should I do this you ask? Because I am part of the generation that he continues to send. There is currently a generation looking at me (& you) the way I looked to previous generations. It is my responsibility and my purpose on earth to give them the truth. I do not want to take my assignment of teaching others about the truth lightly and fail miserably.

John 11:40 "Did I not promise you," replied Jesus, "that if you believe, you shall see the glory of God?"

Acts 2:39 For the promise is to you, and to your children, and to all who are far off, even as many as the Lord our God will call to himself."

Acts 13:32 We bring you good news of the promise made to the fathers, 33 that God has fulfilled the same to us, their children, in that he raised up Jesus. As it is also written in the second psalm,'You are my Son. Today I have become your father.'

Romans 4:16 For this cause it is of faith, that it may be according to grace, to the end that the promise may be sure to all the seed, not to that only which is of the law, but to that also which is of the faith of Abraham, who is the father of us all.17 so that the promise should be made sure to all Abraham's true descendants; not merely to those who are righteous through the Law, but to those who are righteous through a faith like that of Abraham. Thus in the sight of God in whom he believed, who gives life to the dead and makes reference to things that do not exist, as though they did, …

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Isaiah+43&version=ASV;ERV;NIV

Ink Blot Covering Our Past

2013-09-02T06:38:00.003-07:00

Card VIII

HAPPY LABOR DAY 2013 Isaiah 43: 25

"I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake and remembers your sins no more."

blots: to make obscure, hide; obliterate; hide completely; erase; cancel; expunge; eradicate
transgressions: breach of law; sin or crime; evil doing; misconduct; abomination; immorality; iniquity

The first image that popped into my head when I read this verse was the "ink blot" test. (This will make my bestie-Aneita- so proud.) So I did a little research on it. The ink blot test was created by H. Rorschach in 1921 for psychological testing to understand a person's past or present behavior. (It was initially used on schizophrenics but we won't focus on that...ha). It's purpose is to provide a picture of the psychology of the person taking the test. On the second viewing of the 10 ink blots, the viewer is to elaborate on what they saw the first time, therefore attempting to help the psychologist see the same. This offers insights into the motivations of the viewer's behavior.

Relevance, you ask? Well this is my interpretation of the blot covering my transgressions.

God throws some ink on all my sins, crimes, misconduct, basically all my screw-ups because He wants me to be closer to Him, to develop a stronger relationship with him. He does this for His sake. He WANTS us. How often do you feel unwanted in this world? We don't have to feel that way. God wants us and will do what is necessary to have us. Isn't that an inspiring realization?

OK, so he is definitely not throwing ink on us but what He does is completely hide, erase, cancel ALL our mistakes. We need to look at the blot that covers our past through God's eyes and view our lives from His perspective. What do you think He sees when He looks at the blot covering your past? I'm sure it is not the same thing you see. We must leave our mess behind the blot and step out from behind and attempt to see what God sees~ that is the person He created us to be and not necessarily who we are currently.

Praise When There is No Other Way

2013-08-31T06:34:00.000-07:00

From 8/27/13

(I'm still looking at Is. 43: vs 20 & 21 a little closer)

The wild animals honor me, the jackals and the owls, because I provide water in the desert and streams in the wasteland, to give drink to my people, my chosen, the people I formed for myself that they may proclaim my praise.

These verses make me think of a Wheel of Fortune puzzle and the category is 'before & after'. First they make references to how the animals honor God simply because he provides for them~or makes provisions~in places where provisions do not usually exists. Then the provisions made for the animals are also made for his chosen people that they might proclaim his praise. What is so difficult about that? After all He is doing the hard part, all we have to do is give a little thanks. Really?

How often do we stop to consider the provisions God has made for us when circumstances did not warrant provision? When the lights were not shut off, even when we didn't tithe; when our marriage is a thread away from unraveling, and God provided; when our children turn from how they were raised, to one day seeing them restored?

Can I be bold enough to remind God about His promises? to stand firm over sickness and declare "it's not good enough just to feel better from (whatever sickness I may find myself in); Your word says by your stripes I AM HEALED!" (Is. 53:5) It's not good enough just to stay married~ Your Words says I can have joy unspeakable and that you came to give me life more abundantly (1 Peter 1:8, Jn. 10:10). It's not good enough that my child is no longer (fill in the blank...on drugs, in jail, etc), Your word says, "train a child up and when he is old eh WILL NOT turn form it!" (Prov. 22:6).

Do we Proclaim first and then Praise God for those things that are not as if they were? (Romans 4:17)

In vs. 22-24, the children of Israel sin against God. He makes provisions and they do not even thank him. The just stress Him out more. We are the same way. Our children are the same to us. God tells them and us to Stop Worrying & Offending Him! In other words, "DON'T WORRY ME CHILD...I GOT THIS". (Or at least I imagine that is how God talks to me).

Praise God for the provisions he has already made, but more importantly for the ones you have yet to receive.

PERCEIVE IT TO RECEIVE IT.

2013-08-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

Is 43: 14-21 (8/17/13)

Isaiah proclaims a message from God, “I will bring the Babylonians down from Babylon in the ships they were so proud of.” The Lord is your Redeemer, the Holy one of Israel, The Lord, your Holy One, Israel’s creator, your king. He who makes a way through the waters, through the sea, who drew out chariots, horses, army reinforcements~ they will never rise again.

v. 18 forget the former things. Do not dwell on the past. V. 19 God is doing a new thing! It (a new way) springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way through the desert and streams in the west land.

Perceive=to take cognizance of the existence by means of the senses-to see hear, or feel – to apprehend by the mind; to be convinced by direct intuition, to discern comprehend.

8/23/13 YOU MUST PERCEIVE IT TO RECEIVE IT!

I know a lot of people don’t believe in the “positive feeling” preaching but let’s look closer at Is 43: 18-19. How much of our life do we spend regretting or wishing we could change something about our past instead of accepting the negative we regret as life lesson and simply moving. In vs. 19 God tell us he is making a new way for us to get past the past but we must “perceive” it. In other words, we must be convinced and see in our minds FIRST what is yet to be; the new way God is preparing for our life. So where do you see your: life, marriage, career, family, church in five years? It is not a rhetorical question. Take a minute and truly answer those questions; then PERCEIVE IT TO RECEIVE IT.

BE POSITIVE OR BE QUIET

2013-08-24T18:00:00.000-07:00

8/14/13

Be Positive or Be Quiet (J. Olsteen)

Every has a dream something you are believing in ; we tend to talk ourselves out of it. You cannot talk defeat and expect to have victory. When you speak something out loud, you give it life. Everyone has negative thoughts. You can’t stop them from coming you can stop them from becoming reality. Don’t speak it just because you think it. Be positive or be quiet. Proverbs 6:2; Jer. 1:7

Imagine what your dream as a reality. You may not see a way but God still has a way. Refuse to speak defeat with negativity. This is easy during positive times Most difficulty during hard times. If you don’t speak it, it will die and never take root. Ask yourself “Is what I am about to say what I want to come into my life?” say “I will lend and not borrow; God’s favor surrounds me like a shield; Whatever I touch prospers and succeeds; I invite increase, good breaks and success into my life. I am more than a conqueror; if God is for me who can be against me. Call the things that are not as if they were. I am anointed. I am equipped. I am strong in the Lord. I am well abled. I’ve been raised up for such a time as this. People are being drawn to me. When I teach the light bulb goes off ant they understand. Don’t tell everyone your negative thoughts.

Isaiah 43: 1-8 (Aug 6-10)

2013-08-24T09:26:00.000-07:00

Isaiah 43: 1-7 (8/6/13)

The Lord, who created and formed you says, “Fear not for I have redeemed (repurchased, regain possession of by payment of a stipulated price) you. I have called you by name. You are mine. When you pass the waters and rivers I will be with you; the river will not sweep over you. When you walk through fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, Your God, the Holy One of Israel your Savior. I gave Egypt for your ransom (Egypt was the price given for redemption). I gave Cush & Seba on your behalf. Do not be afraid for I am with you. I will summon the North, South, and East & West to gather you, your children, and everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for glory, whom I formed and made.

(8/7/13)(Reflecting on yesterday’s verse) God is proclaiming Israel’s redemption. To proclaim is to make known by public announcement, openly publicize or declare. Since the book of Isaiah is a book of prophesy – things yet to come- Isaiah is declaring openly that the Israelites will be redeemed (repurchased). They will be protected from the waters and the fire, basically any confrontation they may encounter. Although Isaiah doesn’t speak of Jesus at this time – we know His life is the final payment that repurchases them (& us as shown below).

Not only does God proclaim this to Israel – look at verse seven again…EVERYONE He created, formed and made for His glory. Did God form you? Do you believe you were created for glory? Then do not be afraid for God is with you and he will do what it takes to gather and keep you. The final payment was as much for the repurchase of non-Israelites as it was for the Israelites. Verse seven says so.

Isaiah 43: 8 (8/9/13) Lead out those who have eyes but are blind, who have ears but are deaf.

Lead: to guide by means of some physical contact or connection i.e. father/child; jockey/horse; guide dog/blind person.

Blind: lacking discernment, unable or unwilling to understand, inconsiderate ( I do not think this verse in in reference to the physically inability to see with the eyes-my opinion).

Deaf: unwilling to listen

I was surprised when I read the definition of “lead”. My initial visualization was of a tour guide through a nature trail. The physical contact/connection is what stood out. God wants to have a connection with us, but we must be the initiator. Look at the examples given for “lead”. If a child is crossing a street it is usually the parent that reaches out to hold their hand and guide them across. The horse doesn’t see out the jockey; neither does the guide dog seek the blind man.

All of these are content without being led but what a difference occurs when they come together. The child will make it safely across the street. The horse is pampered, trained and led by the jockeys voice and subtle moves. The guide dog allows the blind person to encounter new places with less fear. That’s what the Lord wants to do for us: help us make it safely through our day; listen to our inner voice that guides and instructs us; and experience new places or season’s in our life with less fear than we would have if were encounter them alone. But we must initiate the ‘connection or relationship.

(8/10/13) I don’t believe the reference to the word blind in this verse indicates without sight. The unwillingness to understand seems more like the intended meaning. Remember this chapter is Isaiah is proclaiming or declaring openly the future redemption or repurchase of the Israelites (& us). Although the Israelites have the capability of physically seeing and hearing, their unwillingness to understand or listen prevails. Despite their rebellion God still choose to connect with them and guide him to his promised land.

It amazes me to see how much God can show me out of such a small passage...

Such Things (July 18th)

2013-08-23T09:18:00.001-07:00

July 18^th

(Read Isaiah 38) Pondering on vs. 16, “Lord, by such things men live: and my spirit finds life in them too. You restored me to health and let me live.” This is a statement written by Hezekiah after Isaiah prophesied he would not die but live 15 more years. There are no specific things I can find he is referencing to. I wonder if it is it prayer, hope, I don’t know. Maybe both.