Bitchin' Wives Club

BlogHer '15: Killer Karaoke Friday Night

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Thu, 16 Jul 2015 14:36:00 -0500

Break out your glitter and silver lamé, ladies—Killer Karaoke will be rocking BlogHer '15 for the third year in a row!

After riding the emotional roller coaster that the Voices of the Year keynote is legend for taking us on, head to the VOTY Reception, then catch more great writers at the Listen to Your Mother Open Mic Salon. By 9 p.m. we will all be ready to kick up our heels for real.

Sign up for your turn at the mic.

Or get your friends together for an epic singalong.

Or just come to dance and have some fun.

The BlogHer and SheKnows people know that there are tons of closet-rockstar party people attending the conference who think karaoke is the most satisfying and fun way to express oneself. (Even if you're a karaoke neophyte, you know of what I speak, amirite?) I thank them for continuing to host this party and indulge our community's need to sing it out on stage. Thank you for helping make our karaoke fantasies come true.

Meet me and the other karaoke diehards in the Hilton Mercury Ballroom on the third floor, on Friday night from 9 p.m. to midnight. There will be a bar with libations, loud music, louder singing, and the best audience you could ever hope to sing to.

BlogHer '14: The Killer Karaoke Party is Back!

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 21 Jul 2014 07:00:00 -0500

Who's ready to express themselves at BlogHer '14 through some killer karaoke?

THIS lady.

And these ones.

And these ones, too, I'd wager.

Join me for Killer Karaoke, where BlogHer attendees can let their pipes and personalities shine on stage, for all to hear and dance to. As part of the Voices of the Year and Photos of the Year celebration, BlogHer is offering a slew of parties this year that will have something for everyone. It starts with the VOTY reception and then, between 8 and 11pm, you can choose to head to one of the Open House Suite Parties (so many great ones to choose from, but my personal favorite is Deb Rox' Queerosphere romp—you have to check out the photos from last year in that link), the Listen To Your Mother Open Mic Salon (didn't make it into the VOTY keynote? This is your opportunity to share your post with an audience) or to karaoke. The hardest part of the night will be deciding which parties to hit.

Look for the signs directing you to the karaoke location at the Voices of the Year Reception, the party goes from 9 to 11 p.m. — drinks and food will be on hand.

Check out this video of some of last year's party people who grabbed the mic, worked it out, and spent the evening shaking their groove thangs on the dance floor.

Stop by BlogHer's post with the party plan for Friday night, grab a badge, and proudly let everyone know that you are going to be rocking the karaoke stage at BlogHer '14 in San Jose.

Tweet me at @amyofwindsor (my new handle) if you have any questions or are dying for a duet!

The Acer Aspire S7 Review:

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 14 Oct 2013 07:00:00 -0500

As a brand ambassador for Microsoft's Windows Champions program, I was loaned an Acer Aspire S7 for the a year to explore Windows 8 and Microsoft Office 365. As the year winds down and it gets to be time to say goodbye to the equipment, I am feeling the burn because this laptop, and I am not joking even a tiny bit when I say this, has become an extension of the family. Particularly to my fourteen-year-old son who has become so attached to the Acer that he has implored me buy it from the program and has taken it upon himself to write a review of the laptop for you.

The Acer is an amazing computer, I use it for gaming. The games I play on the Acer are on Steam (a free app which you can buy and play games on or play free games) and Minecraft. Minecraft doesn't need a great computer to play it on, but Steam games are in need of a good, fast computer.

The game I most commonly play is called Team Fortress 2 (free to play on Steam) and on this computer it's the best experience I've ever had playing this game. On my mom's older computer (about 10 times bigger, but from 2006-ish) it was slow, with bad graphics, and every Steam game was close to impossible to play.

The Acer laptop physically is also amazing—its super thin and easy to stow away in a bag or some other case.

So, if you're a gamer like me, then get this computer—it won't let you down in a video game.

~Theo

I will concur with my son that the Acer S7 is a great laptop. Not only is it crazy thin, very pretty (with its aluminum and Gorilla Glass-encased white body), and lightweight (2.86 lbs!), it has a lot more processing power than I expected out of an ultrabook.

And my son wasn't kidding around when he said that playing TF2 on the Acer was the best experience he'd ever had with the game. Before we got the Acer, I called Steam the "computer killer" because it wreaked havoc on every desktop and laptop in our house, crashing constantly and making me yell at Theo that he was going to destroy my computer in his quest to play "Garry's Mod" (another gem that can be found on Steam).

The only limitation that we've experienced with the laptop is that the SSD hard drive is only 128 gigabytes, which gets eaten up pretty quickly between Windows, Office, and Steam's game info (my son's game files take up over 20GB of space).

One great thing that has come from having to keep an eye on file sizes is that I have integrated Skydrive into my workflow during the past year and have become a huge fan of the service. I now use Skydrive to coordinate files across ALL my devices and computers—at home and work. In addition to uploading any individual files I am working on and might want to access from my husband's PC, my iMac at work, or my iPhone, it works in conjunction with Office 365 (all the latest MS Office programs on 5 family computers for $99.99/year) so you can save automatically to Skydrive instead of your hard drive.

All in all, even though I'm still not using OneNote like a pro (a goal I had set for myself because I'm always looking for new ways to get organized, especially if they allow creativity ), I found my year with Microsoft to be exceptional in helping me streamline and sync up my Mac and PC lives.

BlogHer '13: Friday Night (Karaoke) Party Plan

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Sat, 6 Jul 2013 13:58:00 -0500

If there is one thing that blogging has taught me, it is that, no matter how you feel or what you are going through, there are other people out there who have gone through the same thing, are going through it at the same time as you, or will go through something like it in the future. These unseen, but clearly heard, women and men will sympathize with you, laugh with you, offer advice, cheer your soul and cheer you on—with so much care, thought and love that even after almost five years of blogging it still amazes me. Quite simply, the internet, this community of parent bloggers, in particular, has allowed us to find our "tribe" in a way that previous generations have rarely been able to, and in numbers that could once only be dreamed of.

In a smaller way, karaoke does the exact same thing.

Boom! It's karaoke time!

I started going to karaoke bars in Wisconsin about the same time I started blogging, coincidentally, and I have found that a similar bond develops between bar patrons and karaoke singers. I know it sounds crazy, but the same kind of magic happens when people cast off their natural reserve, whether it is to lay their souls bare on the pages of their blogs or on stage singing their favorite song to cheesy karaoke backing tracks. It just does.

Which is why I am so thrilled to be hosting a karaoke party at BlogHer '13, as part of the Friday night party plan at this year's conference in Chicago (July 26). BlogHer manages to harness ALL the tribes within the parent blogger community and allows them to mingle and share ideas for three days every year and it is my most looked-forward-to weekend of the year. From my first time in Chicago 2009, to singing a post at the Voices of the Year keynote in 2010, to hanging poolside 2011, and hitting 5am two nights in a row last year in NYC—the BlogHer conference is unparalleled in scope, size, and the ability to bring together novice bloggers, successful established bloggers and everyone in between.

The BlogHer ladies are mixing it up this year and have put together an amazing night of SIX different parties for people to "tribe up" with their people. You can go to one party or check out all six between 9pm and midnight—it's the ultimate progressive party!

After the Voices of the Year (VOTY) keynote and the VOTY Reception, the parties will be starting up in suites and ballrooms all over the Sheraton. I'm so excited about this new, smaller-venue approach to the parties—I think it will make it easier for attendees to make more intimate social connections at the official conference parties.

We will have food, libations, props, and more sing-a-longs than you can slosh a wineglass at. So start singing extra loud in your car to warm up those vocal cords, jot down what songs you want to sing to the BlogHer crowd, and gird your loins for a fantastic night of laughing, cheering, toasting, and singing your lungs out. We are going to raise the roof on this joint.

Come over and say hi at the party—I'll be the one on stage, either singing or calling your name.

See you there!!!

(Grab a button and put it on your blog to let your friends know where they can find you.)

Non-Stop Work Life Party BlogHer Express

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Wed, 22 May 2013 21:56:00 -0500

After almost three months at my new job, I can honestly say that I am even more suspect of those bloggers who, despite their jobs and families, still find the time to write witty posts about their lives. Clearly they never sleep and survive off copious amounts of illegal stimulants, because let me tell you... working all day and then summoning up the energy to act entertained or even somewhat interested in the activities of your family members when you arrive home is the hardest thing I've ever done.

On the upside: I love my new job. Like, love LOVE it. In fact, I do a lot of what I used to do for fun at home (cruise around the internet looking at cool sites, reading about cool things, taking photos, playing in photoshop, writing, posting on facebook and twitter, etc.), but now I get paid to do it and have the bonus of doing it around lots of interesting people.

Here's a little update of life since I last wrote:

I caught a Crown Royal thong at my very first Mardi Gras parade.

Did anyone else know that this was a thing?

I went to a baby shower and found out via a "party game" that the beyond adorable mother-to-be's waistline, at 8-months, was exactly 1/2" bigger than my everyday waistline. That was fun!

I found out that their is a lucrative niche market for bearded-dragon necklaces.

I fell in love with the Century Oaks on the University of Louisiana's campus.

I allowed my kids to run around the alligators that were out sunning themselves by the lake

at the park. I guess this is a thing in Louisiana?

I continued my love affair with the Spanish moss of Louisiana.

And, last, but certainly not least...

Not just going, friends, I will be HOSTING this little bit of karaoke heaven at BlogHer '13 in Chicago (which really is "my kind of town"). I won't try and sell you on it—either you love karaoke or hate it. I get it.

Nonetheless, I will tell you that the people I went to karaoke with at the last BlogHer in NYC and the Dad 2.0 Summit in Houston bonded in a way that simply can't be matched by normal, run-of-the-mill conference shenanigans. Something magical happens when friends bond over personal interpretations of beloved songs.

I said MAGICAL, dammit.

A Rare Valentine's Treat, Plus a $200 Gift Card Giveaway

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Tue, 5 Feb 2013 10:51:00 -0600

My husband and I, being natural rebels, usually skip the Valentine's Day hoopla because of all its furry/stuffed/chocolatey/gooey-hearted baggage. But also because it is impossible to get a reservation at a good restaurant that night (if you never plan that far ahead) and even harder to get a babysitter (if you usually wait to procure one the afternoon of the night you want to go out). This year I was prepared to really not bother at all since we are new to Lafayette and I still don't really know where to go. Oh, yeah, and we are still holding a second mortgage on our other unsold house and feeling all tapped-out after splurging on Christmas.

Despite all those reasons, I am planning a Valentine's date for my husband, anyway because I have all the bases covered (thus allowing me to make a homerun, if I remember my baseball metaphors correctly)! My mom is going to be in town, so babysitting is a non-issue—and YP – Local Search & Gas Prices app, has stepped in (like a knight in shining armor?) to help me find the perfect restaurant for our night out and is paying for us to go!

Don't be jealous, be happy— Because YP app wants to send you $200 to spend on a Valentine's Day night out, too. Woohoo!

Here's how the YP app sets itself apart from other apps:

First, over 300,000 restaurants have posted their menus, so I can search local restaurants for my husband's favorite dish... like mussels. And then cross-reference the menu for mine... cake!!

Jolie's, which I have never heard anyone talk about down here, looks FAB. In fact, looking at it's menu of Mussels in Garlic Cream Sauce with a side of frítes, it looks a lot like our favorite bistro back in Madison. Perfect for our date!

Second, there is a gas price finder built-in, so I can potentially save that downer moment when I realize that we have to stop and get gas because the light's been on since yesterday, but I forgot to fill up earlier—by knowing that if I go one more block around the corner, we'll save 10¢ a gallon. (After 14 years of marriage, it's the little things, right?)

Third, it also has a movie theater finder that allows you to search by movie title, so you don't have to scroll through each theater's choices to find what times your movie is playing at all of them. Maybe if Lincoln is still in town we can finally catch a showing before the Oscars.

Fourth, it is free, has built in coupons if the business is running a special, and is completely accessible to ALL platforms—iPhone, iPad, Android, Windows, Blackberry and Palm mobile devices. PALM!! (I didn't even know they were still making devices.)

THE RULES

Here is what you need to do to be entered into the drawing for $200:

• Follow me on twitter (click on my twitter feed in the right column to get there -->)

• Tweet to me (@theBitchinWife) and YP (@YP) from the YP app’s social sharing feature:

—That entails downloading the YP app on your phone, selecting the restaurant you want to attend on your Valentine's date and then using the "share via Twitter" through the YP app (see screenshots below).
—Include a brief description of your dream date planned with the YP app
—Use the hashtag #ypvday

Your tweet should look kind of like this:

You can enter the contest TWICE. Once for your tweet and once for re-tweeting my tweet above. The link to my tweet is here.

The contest ends on Monday February 11th, at which time I will direct message you on twitter to get your address and then YP will send you your $200.00 gift card. Good luck!!

Disclosure: I was compensated for this post by YP app.

Dad 2.0 Summit Wrap-Up

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 4 Feb 2013 15:13:00 -0600

My main reason to go to the Dad 2.0 Summit may have been just to get away for a fun weekend and see what the other side of parent blogging gets up to when the mama bloggers leave the room, but I ended up getting a lot more than I bargained for. Doug French and John Pacini, the founders of Dad 2.0, put together a great array of speakers that kept me laughing, thinking, crying, and then thinking some more. Kudos to them for not only booking so many incredible speakers, but scheduling them in a way that kept me happily glued to my seat and never feeling like an outsider.

As a mother to only boys and having only my own experience as a daughter to draw on, I treasured the opportunity to hear all the speakers approaching their topics through the lens of fatherhood. Brene Brown, in particular, hit so many marks in her talk about vulnerability that had everyone in the room nodding along and seeing how the world conspires to make women think they want their male partners to be vulnerable, while at the same time secretly loathing any sign of weakness they may display—which, she pointed out, men are perfectly aware of! So they learn to lie and only share the "acceptable" sorts of vulnerabilities that they think their wives can handle. It was so good to hear her say (not quoting her here, this is what I took away personally) that we all want (and need) the same thing—to have a partner that we can share our fears and weaknesses with that will listen and console, but won't try and fix everything. I wish I had a recording of the talk, it truly was amazing and so full of moments that I wish I could quote perfectly. I guess I'll just have to buy the book and then fill it full of tabbed stickers to refer back to in the future. To whet your appetite, here are a few of the quotes that particularly resonated with me (all quotes pulled from twitter, so accuracy is questionable, to say the least).

"How many times have you walked away from your partner with a huge story in your mind about what just happened that may or may not have anything to do with the truth?"

Brene Brown's advice on "therapy speak" to employ with your partner: Start the conversation with "The story I'm making up right now is...[insert why you think something is bothering you or the other person]."

"The greatest act of vulnerability is parenting."

"To be human is to be vulnerable...to be the partner and parent you want to be...you need to be vulnerable."

"It's not joy that makes us grateful, it's gratitude that makes us joyful." on practicing gratitude with your family.

"You can't raise whole-hearted kids without talking about vulnerability. Or gender conformity, or privilege, or race."

"I used to talk about 'What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?' Now I say 'What's worth doing even if you fail?'"

"Tell your kids a story about when you were struggling at the same age. It will change their lives."

If you haven't ever watched Brene Brown speak, her legendary TEDtalk is a great place to start.

The other highlight of the conference came in the form of the breakout panel "Writing a Wrong: Authentic Blogging Through A Major Life Change." Brad Lawless, Jon Armstrong, Kristen Howerton, and Black Hockey Jesus spoke about their experiences writing their way (carefully and with sensitivity to those involved) through divorce, a traumatic adoption process, and addiction. While none of these are my personal flavor of trauma, I was grateful to hear their advice and thoughts on how to not let raw emotion get the better of you in situations where what you might really want to write on your blog is absolutely not the right thing to write. Posts like that are only going to make YOU feel better, while they would most likely make your family members, your children in particular, feel terrible. Throughout my many moves in the last few years and the upheaval they've caused in my life and relationships, I often find that I can't write about the things that are most heavily weighing on my mind for that very reason mentioned above—unfortunately, my normal response is to shut down and not write anything at all.

This advice from the pros will hopefully help me open back up and enjoy writing again like I used to: Start journaling to get out the emotion and the things that you really want to say. Use that journal as fertilizer (the shit, basically) to get you to the mental space to write the things you can post. The final product can allow you to look back on the emotion with the perspective that (hopefully) you've gained since resolving it, making it not just a venting, but a story with resolution.

I also loved Black Hockey Jesus' exhortation to embrace fantasy in our writing and stop being so goddamed literal. (The wording is mine, the message is his.) Sarcasm very firmly set aside—that man is a poet. I think many in attendance would agree that Jon's writing is so painfully good that it makes one feel sad for their own lack of talent when they read it. Or maybe it's just me and that other person I was talking to who worded it in such a perfect way, but I don't think so...

So, when all was said and done... as a stay-at-home-mother and wife in what I would consider a pretty "traditional" American home (for an almost unseemly amount of years, I might add), my perspective can often get contaminated by the "stories I make up" about why my husband does this or says that. Dad 2.0 set the story straight by allowing me to hear personal stories from real, modern men about how their lives as fathers affects everything they do. It doesn't seem like that big of a revelation, but in our culture that seems almost incapable of showing fatherhood as co-parenting, instead of bumbling ineptitude, it was fantastic to see a bunch of guys who are all just doing their best to love and do right by their kids and families—and saying, "Hey, isn't it about time we got some props for that?"

On top of the thought-provoking speeches, emotional post readings, and a general feeling of "Holy shit, these guys are some of the most thoughtful, coolest, and greatest dads ever." —while NEVER being self-congratulatory about it, I might add—the conference brought together a handful of blogging karaoke die-hards.

You may have seen something in the news about a supernova exploding in the Houston area over the weekend. Rest easy, it was just Chris Read exploding onto the stage at Spotlight Karaoke with a graceful, yet slightly menacing, swing around a karaoke stage stripper pole. Un-fucking-believable. Watch the video below for two nights' worth of highlights...

I want to put about forty links in to all the great people I got to meet and spend time with and the friends I had a chance to reconnect with, too— but a short list is going to have to do: Faiqa, Kristen, Father Muskrat, Andy, Kevin, Jason, Jim, Momo, Polly, Whit, Charlie, Isabel, Liz, Adam, and a special thanks to my pregnant roomie, Jill @babyrabies, for being my designated driver and voice of reason.

Entering Bizzaro World

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Thu, 31 Jan 2013 10:13:00 -0600

I am heading to Houston this weekend for a blogging conference that promises to be extremely interesting on a couple different fronts.

One, it has a great line-up of speakers talking about a lot of topics I'm interested in, i.e. parent blogging issues, keeping your writing authentic while also respecting your family's privacy, how to turn your social media expertise into a full-time job. And I am, quite frankly, starry-eyed about getting to finally see Brene Brown, one of the keynote speakers, in person!

Second, it is going to be outside my comfort zone a little because it is a complete gender-ratio reversal compared to my previous conference experiences.

Huh?

You see, the conference I'm attending is the Dad 2.0 Summit. A conference presumably only for DAD BLOGGERS.

But if you think about it, BlogHer is presumably a conference only for women bloggers (the "HER" in the title says as much), but a handful of well-endowed (...with HUMOR! Get your minds out of the gutter) dads show up every year to participate in the conference sessions and to keep an eye on how their unique voices fit into the parent blogger community. I mean, I assume that's why they're there, anyway.

After four BlogHer conferences and getting to be good friends with quite a few of these guys, when I saw that the Dad 2.0 Summit was scheduled to be in Houston this year (only a four-hour drive from home), I felt like I had to sign up. I am nervous in some regard, because it is going to be really strange to be a gender minority—but I survived five salmon-canning seasons in Alaska, where the male-female ratio is about the same, and, oh my good lord, I survived CES (a tech event so man-centric they convert the women's bathrooms into men's rooms!)—so I know I'll be just fine.

Also, the promise of getting to go out to karaoke with the only other person I know in the world who loves it possibly even more than me makes it a no-brainer. And rest assured (dear husband), I won't be the only lady there, by any means at all! Faiqa, pictured below, and Kristen will be there singing along, too!!! (Along with a host of other women that I adore—check this schedule to see who else will be there.)

Muskrat and Kristen breaking it down with Poison's "Every Rose Has a Thorn."

And, below, Faiqa and Muskrat singing something or other—and killing it.

Winning Tips: How To Create Groups on the Windows 8 Start Screen

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Fri, 18 Jan 2013 15:05:00 -0600

We’re all busy. I get it. I really do. So I totally understand why some people have been grousing about Windows 8 being hard to use… It IS hard to get used to! But the only reason it’s tricky is because it is so different from anything else we’ve used before and that just makes it more interesting, in my opinion. In fact, I think Windows 8 is incredibly forward-thinking and once people get past the learning curve of figuring out how to interact with it fully, via using the touchscreen in conjunction with the keyboard and mouse, it is going to be what every other company will be playing catch-up to. Seriously.

In the meantime, though, a lot of people have new computers and laptops with touchscreens and are probably as frustrated as I was trying to figure out how to get it to do exactly what their old computer did, am I right? Well, once we all get over that notion, things will start getting a lot more fun.

As part of Microsoft’s Windows Champions program, I get to sit in on monthly webinars that give me a peek at people who are using Windows to it’s full potential. Because I don’t usually bother to seek out the finer points of operating system manipulation on my own, i.e. figure out anything I can’t intuitively figure out during normal use, or because I am generally too busy to be bothered, these webinars are a really good thing.

For example, I’ve been using this super-slick new Asus Aspire S7 touchscreen ultrabook, that Microsoft loaned me, for about a month and have been using the beta of Windows 8 for even longer… and yet, I had no idea that, beyond simple drag-and-drop tile rearrangement, the start screen can be turned into an organizational mecca that would satisfy the most fastidious of users.

And now I can teach you how to create groups on your start screen, too!

What. That’s not exciting to you?

Sheesh, baby steps, people. *eyeroll* And trust me, a well-organized start screen is the first step to easily navigating Windows 8.

First, you need to open your start screen (just hit the Windows key, that’s the one with the four blocks on it, for crying out loud) on your keyboard. Now, using your mouse or trackpad, NOT your touchscreen, move the curser around. This will pull up a drag bar across the bottom of the screen that ends in a wee, tiny minus (“-“) sign in the right-hand corner. Click on the minus sign.

That make all of your tiles go into a birds-eye view, so you can see them all at once. Now, right-click on a section of the tiles and it will pull up a bar across the bottom of the screen with an icon and the words “Name Group.”

Click on the icon and then name your group. I have sections called “Faves" for my most-used apps, “Kitchen” for all the apps I use while cooking, and another section reserved for all the people I want to keep tabs on, in a 100% un-stalker-y way, of course. (I will show you how to add people to your start screen next week.) After naming all your groups, you can rearrange the groups in that same birds-eye view area, so they are ordered just like you’d like them to be. To fine-tune your groups, you will need to drag and drop each of the app tiles individually, on the start screen. If you don’t already know how to close an app (you will inevitably open one accidentally while rearranging), you do so by simply swiping with your finger from the top of the screen to the bottom, over the open app.

So, this is what my start screen looks like now, as opposed to just a bunch of apps randomly grouped:

Pretty cool, huh? And easy, if you know how to do it. Which you now do.

BABY STEPS.

Family Wordplay

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Fri, 11 Jan 2013 14:31:00 -0600

One of my favorite things in life is a great play on words. Honestly, I find few things as satisfying as when a situation presents itself and you can kill your companion, or a crowd, with a perfectly layered, be it clever or silly, response.

Actors need audiences, singers need stages, and I need witty conversation partners.

So, it is with a warm heart and gushing pride that I share a few instances of how my small brood of boys are starting to follow in the family passion.

The other day we drove by a Hooters restaurant and one of the boys asked what it was, unsure what kind of store would sell only owls. I explained that it was a restaurant that served lots of fried food and that it's hook was that all the waitressed had to wear super-short shorts and tiny t-shirts that showed their stomachs. The boys were aghast and perplexed as to why, why, i say?!, anyone would want to see that sort of thing. (Ah, the joys of pre-pubescence!)

Then CC says, "Mom, they should just call that place 'Ruders', because that is just plain RUDE."

And then, bless his clever little heart, the Animal pipes up from the back, "No, they should call it LEWDERS!"

Being only six-years-old, I'm not ready to give the kid a 100% credit on knowing what he was saying... he could've been saying "Looters!" merely for the rhyme. But possession is 9/10's of the law, so I am going to let my baby own it.

On another recent occasion, I was having a chat with the boys about being safe on the internet. We've covered the basics of never giving out personal information and the like before, but this talk was specifically about not opening things they download unless it is absolutely, positively the program or mod they intended to get. I also went over other ways that viruses can get injected in your computer, like emails sent with mysterious links from people they don't know, especially the ones that say things like, "LOL, did you see that photo someone posted of you? So funny!", links on sites that lead them to pop-up ads—NEVER click a link on a pop-up!!—etc., etc., the point being that you should never click on anything you're unsure about just because you're curious what will happen.

Destructo then chimes in, "Mom, instead of 'Curiosity killed the cat,' it should be, 'Curiosity killed the COMPUTER."

I'm not ready to say the my job is done here, but we are definitely on the way to some riveting games of Balderdash.

2012, Video Wrap-Up and House Survey

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Wed, 2 Jan 2013 11:35:00 -0600

Someday in the distant future I might look back on 2012 with fondness—it is the year we settled in Southern Louisiana, after all. But right now I am still stuck on the overriding fact that it was the year we moved and moved and MOVED. Here's my video re-cap of the year that passed. Enjoy!

Because I was too lazy to edit them into the video, I thought you might like to see the houses we lived in this year, in sequential order.

Our house in Madison. 8/1998 — 3/2012.

Our first house in Louisiana. The Heaton House, between New Orleans & Lafayette. 2/2012 — currently for sale.

I didn't even mention the seven weeks that I stayed at our cottage in Iowa! (Long enough of a stay that I finally had a washer & dryer installed—both of which had to be brought in via a window on the second floor!)
6/5/2012 —7/26/2012

And now we live at the North Pole. 10/2012 — FOREVER.

On Being a Wastrel Housewife

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Fri, 7 Dec 2012 13:35:00 -0600

I find myself in the not totally unenviable position of being a stay-at-home-mom who no longer has children at home during school hours, nor an onerous school pick-up / drop-off commute to deal with (my days of driving 3+ hours a day are thankfully over). So, this means that during the day I'm not always as busy as I used to be—which would be great news if I didn't have a financial responsibility to my family that compels me to want to get a job and start bringing home some bacon. So, just go get a job, right? Well... the situation is more complicated that that and more anxiety-producing (which for me, sadly, means going into a paralyzing across-the-board procrastination mode) because despite having that extra time during the day—I still have way too many family-related responsibilities on my plate to make a full-time job feasible.

I know, cry you a f*cking river, right?

So anyway, back to my bitching... on the days when I don't have something important to get done or, more likely, am avoiding some bothersome chore, I've taken to loafing around the house. Sure, I get some laundry done, maybe cook a little something for dinner, but nothing too strenuous and definitely not anything that requires my leaving the house.

So this morning (fine, it may have been more like noon, and, yes, I was still in sweatpants), I go to twitter for my daily kvetch to tweet:

"I am more than happy to live the life of a shut-in today, but a few vital errands are barring my ability to be a total wastrel today."

Now, I was going to use the word "wastoid," (and now see that I should've cut that last "today") but that had too much of a stoner feel to it. Since I live in neither Washington nor Colorado, I opted for the more old-school term "wastrel." Being the good little English student that I pride myself to be, I did a quick check on my cel phone dictionary to make sure I had spelled it correctly. The eye-opener when I looked it up, though, was the definition—I thought the word wastrel just meant "good-for-nothing layabout", but my phone offered up a definition with a brilliant twist:

Wastrel - "someone who dissipates resources self-indulgently"

I actually laughed out loud for an (almost uncomfortably) long time because, as I sit here on the couch, watching old episodes of "The B---- in Apt. 23" on Hulu, while ordering stuff on the internet and eating peanut-butter-filled salty pretzels and drinking grape Propel—that couldn't describe my day any more perfectly.

.....

Now will somebody hire me, please? (Oh, and pay me enough to hire someone else to pick up the kids from school, usher them through the hours of soul-crushing homework time and then prep dinner Monday through Thursday?) Thanks!

Top 100 Mom Blogger

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 3 Dec 2012 18:06:00 -0600

I was thrilled to find out today that my blog was named to Babble's Top 100 Mom Bloggers of 2012 list! I've been writing, confiding, cooking, crying, laughing, singing, and, of course, bitching on this blog for four long years, and I am so, so thankful that people have been interested enough to keep coming back to read what I write.

It seems like an eon ago that I wrote my first post about driving to Chicago to return a Christmas present and even longer since my then two-year-old Animal decided to treat a quart of buttermilk like a Stomp Rocket. Even my stint at Babble's Strollerderby Blog, where I wrote about parenting news, which ended almost exactly one year ago, seems like a lifetime ago! It already seems like a year ago that I was on The Today Show talking about having three boys with ADD—and it was barely two months ago!! Of course, a million things have happened since then, not least of which was yet another move.

After three years of moving around the world and back again, I am finally feeling settled in our new house and like I might have some semblance of getting my sh*t together. Of course, if I really did get it collected there would probably be less to write about. (A conundrum we shall ponder another day...) Hopefully, if nothing else, I will have more time to continue sharing the ongoing adventures of the family that never gets bored (or boring).

Thank you, Babble, for recognizing the time and talents of as many great bloggers as you are able to—there are so many inspiring women on this list, it is truly humbling to be part of the group.

What the Petraeus Affair Means to Mom Bloggers

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Thu, 15 Nov 2012 12:15:00 -0600

In the run-up to Thanksgiving, my kids have been studying the Pilgrims and Puritans and I can't help but notice some striking similarities between their morality-driven lives and certain political goings-on in the United States.

Something tells me that Petraeus is probably not feeling particularly "thankful" this holiday season for the FBI Puritans that felt his extramarital affair was worth investigating for security breaches. While I think we can all agree that extramarital affairs are something to be frowned upon, I think we can also agree that it is shocking to see a relatively small-fry complaint by a Tampa socialite queen bee, regarding some anonymously-sent emails sent by a jealous lover, could spur an FBI investigation of Gen. David Petraeus, the head of the CIA? It seems unreal to me that an affair with his biographer, Paula Broadwell, a smart, successful, ambitious woman, has ended with him feeling compelled to resign his position and is now threatening the careers of General John R. Allen, Jill Kelley, the Tampa woman who initially complained and who has shared some overly-friendly emails with Gen. Allen, and possibly even the FBI agent who filed the complaint for her, Frederick W. Humphries II (who happens to be a family friend of the Kelley's).

Confused by all the players? It would be understandable when the investigation is playing out like a military-based soap opera, splashed, in high-definition, across the pages of the New York Times. The joke, of course, is on all of us, because tax-payers are footing the bill for the investigation! Doesn't it seem like Magnum, P.I. or the investigators of Moonlighting could've taken care of this whole thing?

Oh, who am I kidding? These two would've given those crazy lovers a break.

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I'd like to point out something we should all be thankful for: That we can use their extramarital mistakes to learn some valuable lessons.

And, my internet-loving friends and blogging peers, there are some very important issues at play here that we need to be paying especially close attention to: the matter of our privacy in an increasingly digital age.

NY Times' reporter, Scott Shane, wrote about this privacy issue brought up by the Petraeus investigation, noting, "On the Internet, and especially in e-mails, text messages, social network postings and online photos, the work lives and personal lives of Americans are inextricably mixed. Private, personal messages are stored for years on computer servers, available to be discovered by investigators who may be looking into completely unrelated matters."

To that point, another news story noted that the ensuing investigation into Gen. Allen's relationship with gal-pal Kelley, whose career is now in limbo while waiting to see what investigators decide, was initiated because a few blue emails between those two were found among the 10,000 emails investigators were looking through for the Petraeus case! From the article:

Pentagon officials said the review covered more than 10,000 pages of documents that included “inappropriate” messages. But associates of General Allen have said that the two exchanged about a dozen e-mails a week since meeting two years ago and that his messages were affectionate but platonic.

A law enforcement official, speaking on the condition of anonymity, disputed that assertion on Wednesday, saying some messages were clearly sexual. Investigators were confident “the nature of the content warranted passing them on” to the inspector general, the official said.

Well, THAT isn't reassuring—because what they're saying is that while investigating a potential "security breach" by Petraeus with his biographer/lover, these guys found some personal emails between Allen and Kelley and then decided to investigate them, too.

Nope, not reassuring at all. I get that these guys have very important jobs, but COME ON. Seriously? Isn't there a War on Terror somewhere that needs the attention of our FBI agents a little more than this 'who is sleeping with who' business??

No matter whether you sympathize with Petraeus or if you think cheating spouses are getting what they deserve for their duplicity, what we can all take away from this mess is that almost every piece of electronic communications with everyone you know is up for grabs in an investigation. In particular, if you missed the various verdicts that have come out over the last year or so, pretty much everything you write, even in "private message" form in social media, can be subpoenaed and used against you. Facebook and twitter are the first places a good divorce lawyer will turn to when gathering evidence against your spouse—or you—if there was an affair. If you are part of the mom-blogger zeitgeist and put almost all your personal information out into the great searchable internet, well,... best of luck keeping anything secret, even the information you were absolutely positive was just between you and one other person.

While I'm all for wronged spouses getting their pound of flesh in the form of alimony, I know that not everything is always what it seems. It's bad enough that such emotion-based evidence can be used against a person in a divorce proceeding—what about the people who end up having their careers destroyed, too? I find our adherence to an age-old morality code, a code that is, by the way, bound to catch out at least 1 in five married men (and about 14% of married women), in the matters of business and careers bizarre. People are people and you can't fight human nature. After years of observation, I have gleaned that (gasp!) a lot of men have a hard time keeping their you-know-whats in their pants. Especially middle-aged guys. The 45+ guys not only have affairs, but seem to lose their fucking minds over them, too, particularly when the woman is younger. I'd cite references, but why bother when I'm 100% positive that you personally already know a man who has done this or a divorcée who's ex is that guy.

To be perfectly clear, I am not saying that cheating on your spouse is okay. (I would be righteously pissed off if my husband cheated on me.) But, I think that every couple works through an affair in their own way—and that 'between the couple' is where the issue of an affair should remain. If the parties involved weren't breaking the law by being together (or, say, embezzling funds to pay off their lover, like that old cad Jim Bakker did with Jessica Hahn, for example) then it is an issue that the involved parties need to resolve. I, for one, certainly don't feel like I need to hear about every important business person's personal affairs on CNN or even the local news, but I know I will be subjected to them eventually. We Americans love a good sex scandal!

Which brings us to the biggest scandal of them all, of course.

Remember a certain White House intern named Monica Lewinsky? Don't worry, if you were just (thankfully) starting to forget, her new book should jog your memory—an "unnamed publisher" seems to think her re-telling of the 15-years-ago affair (possibly accompanied by letters from Bill Clinton complaining about his sex life with Hillary!) that her story is worth $12 million. For that kind of money, I hope it also includes a sex tape complete with a cigar-sniffing money shot. Barf. It seems hard to believe there was anything left unsaid at the time, as Linda Tripp revealed every breathless secret that the then-22-years-old and naive, in-over-her-head Monica ,spilled to her in Congressional hearings and endless documents that kept the entire country bathed, and completely enthralled, naturally, in the tawdriness of it all.

The Petraeus scandal, to me, isn't just another sex scandal, though. It is a scary revelation that rights to privacy are standing on very shaky ground right now and that even the head of the CIA during very shaky political times on the world stage can be brought down by old emails in his inbox.

Part of the answer to the problem is that we all need to choose our methods of communicating more carefully, another may be that investigators, whether they are FBI or local police, need to have their methods of discovery regulated in such a way that time and tax monies aren't wasted on investigations into anything read and deemed by an individual agent as sexually "inappropriate."

The biggest takeaway here is that your mom was right when she told you: Don't write anything down that you aren't prepared for everyone to see.

We're Moving Again and, No, We Are Not Crazy

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 8 Oct 2012 13:33:00 -0500

As beautiful as our new home is, as magical as the sweeping oak tree-filled front lawn looks at sunset, and as ravishing as the morning appears every day as the dew sparkles on the grass looking down to the bayou... We just can't stay.

For every bit of rural beauty that we adore and soak up when we are outdoors, our family withers a little bit more in an isolation that has bred untold gigabytes of data streamed over the high-speed cable internet and a troubling distance between me and my husband.

We just aren't living a full life out here in the boonies. Our newness to the area keeps us from having a constant stream of visitors that might make this kind of bucolic paradise alright for a Louisiana-bred social-minded couple, but our physical distance from all things related to the kids' schools and my husband's workplace are keeping us homebound and exhausted from the activity of just getting to and from those places. We barely have a chance to meet anyone and certainly aren't as integrated as we thought we would be by now. In addition to our individual frustration with this now missing social aspect of our lives, our marriage has been strained—we both need to to see each other outside our roles of spouse and parent and back in our natural element of fun-loving man and woman.

We started looking at homes last month, stringently nixing any houses without mature trees, without pools, without guesthouses... And, uh, yeah—you can imagine how well that went.

So we widened the net a bit. And then we widened it some more. And then I spent a morning at my friend's (one of the very few) house. She lives in a country club development that my only experience with, before that morning, had been via a viewing of the most malaise-soaked house I've ever seen.* I shook that off, however, when I settled into a sofa, Starbucks in hand (Starbucks being a novel treat these days, as the nearest one is 35 minutes away and inconveniently located to my normal pathways, at that), in Bee's delightful home. I asked for her opinion on living there, curious about her thoughts since she is a recent transplant, as well, haling from a neighborhood in Washington state that sounded not unlike the one we had left in Madison.

She explained that she had some initial reservations—lack of trees, fear of losing a unique identity that one might feel is inextricably tied to one's home, fear and mistrust of suburban douche-baggery and soullessness (okay, those last two are all me)—but the ease of living there and the subsequent happiness of the kids had outweighed them. She went on to talk about how she can let the kids take off for the park or a friend's house on their bikes after school and never worry about what might happen to them, how neighbors watch out for you and your kids, how she can exercise at the club (yes, they even have yoga and pilates classes) just down the road, play tennis with the kids, and they can use the club pool all summer long. I was warming to all of these pictures of neighborhood bliss, when she suggested we walk over to this house just down the way that she knew had been sitting empty for awhile, because she had looked at it herself months before. And then we did something that has become almost unthinkable since moving to Lousiana—

We walked there.

The angels sang as we walked along the sidewalk, putting one foot in front of the other with the intention of arriving at a pre-determined destination—the novelty of it in my newly car-dependent existence made me positively giddy! We went by houses that, while somewhat soulless by virtue of their resplendent newness, were not altogether lacking in character. This was good. I couldn't have picked out a single facade from the other neighborhood street that housed the previously mentioned Maison de Mélancolie.

We got to the house and it looked... nice. We peeked through the door and windows and it looked... really nice. I resolved to call my agent after leaving and make sure it was on our list of places to look at the next day. I finished my visit with Bee and headed home while getting the viewing lined up. It turns out that the price had just dropped on the house, putting it into our price range (barely), and the listing agent said that she was expecting an offer later that day. Riiiiiight. Okay, maybe she was telling the truth, who knows, either way, I bumped the viewing up to right after picking up the kids from school. My husband met me there and I walked over from my friend's, who graciously let me leave the kids to run amuck at her place while we took a look.

If I had to guess, I'd say it was the vaulted ceiling in the family room with exposed wood and cypress timbers and the gorgeous outdoor kitchen and fireplace that won us over. It has a uniqueness that appeals to both of us and the living spaces are really well laid out for both day-to-day family life and entertaining.

We hope to close and be in the new place by the end of next month and it is not soon enough. The boys get to stay at their current schools, so the move should be pretty seamless. We want to get in and then press the reset button on our whole Cajun experience, this time with the self-knowledge that we need a social component in our marriage to make this family work. Marriage without date nights, it turns out, is just not sustainable for us. It is part of our dynamic that must be acknowledged and adhered to, without fail. Date Night saved our marriage after our first son was born and it will do it again, I am sure, 13 years later.

So, even though it means saying goodbye to this (and the romantic notions that it carried):

Goodbye, sunsets from the porch swing.

And saying hello to cul-de-sac living alá:

Hello, neighbors!

After the last few years of life being so difficult to navigate as we moved from the US to England and back again, then cross-country from Wisconsin to Louisiana, we are confident that moving to a house and neighborhood that are easy is absolutely the right thing for us to do.

******

*Oh, that sad, sad house! It sat at the edge of a cul-de-sac, this Maison de Mélancolie, squeezed into an odd lot-sized submission, garage presented to the world. I'm not sure where the melancholy radiated from, whether it was from the house or my own person, but there it was, haunting every forest green and navy blue embellishment. The grandiosity of every "upgrade" spoke of more flush economic times, when the family who first lived there probably enjoyed every privilege and then sent their blooming children off to college. The tiredness of the oaken cabinetry and the pervasiveness of the aggressive wallpapering of every room in those most fashionable of early-nineties colors spoke of current harder times, or maybe just neglect, that allowed the people living there to let life and times go on without caring that their home was becoming more and more dated. In fact, they were unloading the house "as is", water damaged walls and baseboards, included. That the house had been sitting empty for who knows how long and they still didn't make the effort to have it cleaned up and repainted speaks volumes, I suppose, just as the house spoke volumes to me—all of it of the most dire nature and all saying "DO NOT BUY HERE."

When in NYC, Don't Forget Broadway

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Sat, 15 Sep 2012 14:50:00 -0500

One of the brightest spots on my recent trip to NYC for BlogHer was seeing a Broadway show. I was surprised and thrilled when I was offered a pair of tickets by Holly from MamaDrama and jumped at the chance to see a production of Porgy and Bess. I had heard an interview with David Alan Grier (in the role of Sportin' Life) on Fresh Air just a week before and had read the NY Times review of the show which had described Audra McDonald's performance of Bess as "towering." So towering, in fact that she won a Tony for her performance!

I'd never seen Porgy and Bess before, nor would count myself a true fan of opera, but I was enthralled by the experience and the show. I am a music-lover and am always listening to something and singing along, wherever I am, so I fancy myself as, if nothing else, a person who appreciates the talent it takes to sing. Being familiar with only with the pop versions of the songs of Porgy and Bess (like Fantasia's version of Summertime), it was truly thrilling to be exposed to the technical level of singing that the performers brought to this show and to hear the songs as they had originally been written.

All the performers were wonderful, but I have to say that Audra McDonald brought an energy to the show that was unlike anything I've seen before. It was like a smoldering, seething volcano was on stage every time she appeared—Bess' emotions were constantly battling inside and then soaring out through her voice. McDonald's emotional intensity was almost palpable. I can't imagine how she maintains that level of intensity for every performance, but she does! (I am sure she must be looking forward, in a bittersweet way, to the shows closing on Sept. 23, when she can lay the poor, troubled Bess to rest.)

Me and @Parisbug, pre-show.

Another exciting element to the show was the fact that our seats were so close to the stage. Previously relegated to seats in the back, I had no idea that the actors had microphones taped to their wigs or snaking up behind their ears, nor that they sweat just as much as you guessed they might (but can't see from the balcony), or that the "p" sound could send such explosive amounts of water from a person's mouth. The magic of the theater wasn't dimmed at all for these discoveries—they only deepened my respect for the artists that manage to pull it off a Broadway show on a daily basis.

I am so thankful to MamaDrama and Porgy and Bess for offering this opportunity to some of the bloggers attending BlogHer. Broadway shows may go on the road, but there is NOTHING like seeing a show in that famous district in New York City with the original performers chosen for the roles. THANK YOU!

If you are in NYC in the next couple weeks, you can catch one of the last showings of Porgy and Bess before it closes! Just go to the Porgy and Bess website for details.

Cooking the Coonass Way

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Mon, 10 Sep 2012 14:30:00 -0500

My husband and eldest son went crabbing the other morning on Marsh Island in the Vermillion Bay with a friend and his son, who had the gear and local knowledge of the best places to set up the nets. They did spectacularly well and ended up netting 7 dozen blue crabs—that's right, over EIGHTY crabs!! My husband's co-worker was kind enough to relieve us of cooking them (because we didn't know quite what to do with them) and invited us all over to his place for a crab boil and to watch the LSU (Louisiana State University) game.

As I have only seen baby blue crabs before, I had no concept of what a windfall their catch was, but was smart enough to know that I was pretty glad 007 hadn't brought half of them home for me. Instead, he only brought home a big bag of shrimp that he said was part of the bounty of the bayou. I was amazed that two pounds of shrimp could be caught so easily, too, and packed them on ice to make for dinner the next day. (More on that later in this post.)

Are you as curious as I was about how many crabs that is? Check this out:

A tub of Louisiana blue crabs, seven dozen of 'em!

Cooking the crabs in a 30-gallon pot with, I'm guessing, Zatarain's Pro Crawfish & Crab boil, along with corn, potatoes, celery, and onions.

Now that is starting to look pretty damn good.

Crab decimation. You have to work for every bite, but, oooooh, it is worth it.

So now we're feeling all kinds of Cajun. Maybe even a little bit Coon-ass (a term for born and bred Louisiana Cajuns that people keep telling me isn't nearly as offensive as it sounds).

So, the next afternoon I spend laboriously de-heading, shelling, and de-veining the shrimp that the guys brought back, and then sauté-ing and combining with past for a delectable feta-shallot-garlic dish that my husband affectionately dubbed "super-pasta" some many years ago.

We sit down to eat and I propose a toast to husband and son for bringing home so many native treasures for us to enjoy, adding that, in my opinion, crabs and shrimp beat pheasant and deer any day of the week, It is at this point that CC says, "We didn't catch any shrimp." I was like, "WHAT? What do you mean, you 'didn't catch any shrimp?'" And he says, "Yeah, we only caught, like, ONE shrimp. Are these the shrimp I brought in from the boat yesterday?" I nodded in the affirmative. My husband's eyes seemed to expand a bit. "Oh my gosh. Mom, those shrimp were BAIT! I wondered why Dad asked me to bring them in and put them in the fridge!"

Stomach: Turned.

So, yeah, I cooked up a mess of bait last night for dinner. I guess they didn't taste too bad for sitting in a baitwell for a few hours, but I'm going to be double- and triple-checking my food sources from now on.

Oh, and I'd prefer if we never spoke of this again, okay?

How To Be a Man (and Drunken Karaoke)

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Wed, 15 Aug 2012 23:24:00 -0500

It's a video two-fer today at Bitchin' Wives Club! I recently joined the MomPulse community on YouTube, where moms can vent in vlog-form, and share ideas about parenting or their thoughts on a weekly topic. (It's brand new, so check it out and see what the moms in our group have to say.)

My vlog on "Modern Rites of Passage For My Soon-To-Be 13-Year-Old Son" is the "featured" video of the week and here it is for your viewing pleasure:

For the record, my son mows all four acres of our yard and is getting to be a real maestro at the controls of our zero-radius turn Kubota ride-on lawn mower. Kudos, son.

Now, for the drunken karaoke.

The drunken (or mostly sober, in my case, on the second night, anyway...) karaoke happened to be two of my favorite moments of BlogHer '12. AND HOW COULD IT NOT, I ASK YOU. It's only a wee snippet, but it is of the best karaoke tune for closing out a bar EVER, in my not-so-humble-opinion — Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody. I'm not in it, but you can hear me wailing off-screen, slightly out of tune, but with gusto. Maybe someday when I'm looking for an excuse to hate myself, I'll call the Muskrat and see if he'll show me the video he took of me singing this (you see us filming each other at the end).

Oooooooooor NOT.

Making the Most of BlogHer

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Thu, 9 Aug 2012 10:48:00 -0500

It may sound cliché, but BlogHer manages to top itself every year by making that year's conference the "best one yet." How do Lisa, Elisa, and Jory do it? Oh, with the little things... like booking President Obama, Katie Couric and Martha Stewart. But also with their uncanny ability to remain accessible, friendly and as real as you or I, all while delivering an event that runs as smoothly as any vehicle carrying over attendees is capable of. Their ever-expanding team of talented and smart women (I'm talking to YOU Diane (MomoFali), Stacy (BklynStacy), and Shannon (Mr. Lady), just to name a very small few...) work really hard to make the event come off this well and I'd just like to say THANK YOU.

My roommate Ann, a fellow Madison (where I USED to live) blogger I am lucky enough to call my Blog-BFF and have roomed with for the past four consecutive BlogHer conferences, said, as we discussed the brilliance of some session or interview we had just participated in/seen, and I have to paraphrase here because I can't remember exactly how she said it, "Amy, can you believe the opportunities that we've been given and the things we've gotten to do since we started our blogs?" And I could honestly answer, "No." I really can't believe it. Starting my blog four years ago has led to some of the closest friendships I've made since college, countless opportunities to meet kindred souls and share what I love doing with them, and probably at least ten really amazing opportunities that I completely squandered because I didn't see them for what they were... or didn't think that I was good enough to fulfill them... or wasn't professional enough to follow through on.

What?! I just threw a little curveball in there, didn't I? You see, this year BlogHer has made me reflective about my blogging career rather than my usual post-BlogHer reveling in the afterglow of so much love and camaraderie...

Which brings me back to BlogHer and how during those four days that I attended the conference, I felt like I could do anything I set my mind to—that the career I want to have was literally just there for me to grab, if I would/could just sit down and write every day. I know I have a book (or three) of stories in me and all I need do is write them down—if I could just do that then putting together the proposals and getting the right meetings will all just fall into place....

And then I returned home to my boys, my husband, my house, my life... There is laundry stacked in at least four rooms, there's a line of ants going from the door to the cat dish, the front room looks like the entirety of the mown lawn's clippings have been deposited on the floor, the stairs have kitty litter dribbled down them, and don't even get me started on the dead cockroach that is on the white tile RIGHT BESIDE THE BATHROOM DOOR.

I ended up being a huge grump with my husband when he got home from work the next day. Partially because after I had shared something I hoped to do in the next few months with him his first comment was that I was "reaching." In a bad way, like my story isn't nearly as special as I think it is. He perhaps meant it merely as a reach for the political implications I projected onto the idea, but my feelings were hurt nonetheless. But mostly I was in a terrible mood because it is such a huge letdown to come back home where the seemingly endless responsibilities, the dirt, the kids, the work of a marriage all converge and overwhelm me—and dash my hopes that I will be able to get more organized and "just get the writing done" like I imagined while gone.

After four days of endless parties, taking meetings, doing dinners, talking with the blogging world's movers and shakers, and generally being treated just short of a rock star at BlogHer—coming home feels like the worst coke hangover of all time.

(Not that I would know, but it looks pretty awful in Less Than Zero.)

So now what? Well, I'm going to make my twice yearly attempt to truly organize my days and will set aside 1 hour for facebook and twitter in the morning, followed by two hours of writing, followed by working out, followed by doing all the myriad other things that need my attention for the rest of the time before the kids get home from school. My kids have entered an entirely new stratosphere of homework requirements, so I am writing off having any free time at night until well after bedtime. If I am truly motivated, I will cut my TV schedule down to just the basics, too (but, God, I hope it doesn't come to that—I need my shows!).

I will also be thinking long and hard about a great conversation that I had with Erica Diamond, the founder of Women on the Fence, at the conference. She has dedicated her life to helping other women find balance in their lives and careers and she really helped me work through some of these emotions, assuring me that I could move forward with my dreams, but that it's okay to wait, too, secure with the knowledge that I will still be able to make it happen when I am ready to "get off the fence" and move forward with my career.

Thanks for inspiring me for another year, BlogHer!!! I'm going to work my ass off to try and make the most of everything I took away from this year's conference, so I can help make 2013's BlogHer the best ever, too.

****CORRECTION / EXPLANATION****
Due to some of the comments made regarding my husband, I'd like to clarify that while I was annoyed with him because he hurt my feelings—I also don't expect him to understand a good portion of my on-line life. What we do in Blogland is kind of bizarre (admit it, it's true!) and though I might want him to understand all the nuances, I know that it is unfair to get mad when he "doesn't get it." He tries to get it, though, and respects that I care deeply about it—which is all I feel comfortable asking him to do.

I am fully aware that I would not be in a position to while away the hours writing and honing my social media expertise if I wasn't being financially supported through his efforts and paycheck. Someday I hope that I can turn that around and support him with my career, but for right now we are as happy as any couple in the weeds of parenthood can be. :)

Who Needs to Settle Down? I've Got BlogHer!

noreply@blogger.com (Amy W) — Wed, 1 Aug 2012 16:40:00 -0500

I really want to give Louisiana a chance to grow on me, but so far there just hasn't been enough time. No doubt, in time I'll be mildewed along with everything else left outside for too long around here, but for now I am off again...

After just getting back from my summer in Iowa last week, I am now off to NYC for the mother of all blogging conferences: BlogHer '12.

In addition to the usual array of fascinating and/or business-of-blogging related sessions, the keynote speakers this year are over-the-top. Sure, you might be impressed to hear that Martha Stewart, Soledoad O'Brien, and Katie Couric are all talking, but it was just announced today that President Obama will be making a special appearance live via satellite on Thursday afternoon.

Now, I would never underestimate the value of a mom blogger's opinion or her power to reach and affect her audience... but, HOLY SH*T, I HAVE TOTALLY UNDERESTIMATED THE POWER OF THE MOM BLOGGER.

Alright, fine, that was a bit hyperbolic—but I am seriously impressed that the President of the Unites States wants to talk to us.

And straight-up kudos and standing ovations all around to the ladies of BlogHer who pulled this off. So happy to be part of the huge, ever-changing and growing group of women and men that make up this organization.