If-then-else...

Blog end post

2025-01-02T11:34:00.001+05:30

Since last year, AI adoption has moved even further. It has sped up tasks, has solved problems, has generated content way beyond we had initially thought.

And even with all this, I make this post after a year.

In the last two or three years, there has been this question that some side of the brain would ask the other -

"purpose kya hai? What is the intent?"

"Nothing. Aise hi. Just like that."

"Bas to fir. If there is no purpose, there is no pressure."

And this is how the blog became dormant.

Overall, 2024 had been very sluggish in terms of these side projects and the yearly routine stuff I had been doing in the past decade.

So much that there is this question - "Do I really want to do this anymore?"

I guess when the inner child within you dies a slow death, year by year - such activities take a backseat.

But if this inner child is dying, who is taking its place?

A grumpy man in his forties?

I hope not.

They say that every ten years, the cells in your body get replaced by the newer ones, and you become a new person altogether. It is a gradual process, but it changes you.

Your tastes change.

What you dislike, you start liking.

And your enthusiasm gradually declines in stuff you loved doing.

In a parallel thought, you feel like a tiny fish in an endless ocean watching the marine life passing by. Trying to find where you need to head next.

Can you aspire to become a whale? Or a shark? Or just remain to be a small fish, which is not bad either.

But these are just useless thoughts. Because the fact is, you are whatever you are. And nothing can change that. All that you can do is to play by your strengths. And that is the only leverage you've got.

I started this blog in 2005. Made around 200+ posts. Logged some good experiments, travel, films and books. And some posted some pictures too. This blog was something that I loved updating, on and off.

Lately my focus has shifted to Youtube. It is something that I really enjoy doing, and since I do that more frequently, it is expected to continue for a few years at least.

The idea of 2025 is to minimize the choices in life; time has come for this blog to retire. Maybe, I will revive it again - depending on the existence - my life and this platform - both.

If you're still reading this, do come back here on 1st January, 2045. Set a reminder, I insist.

Till then, I will let this space continue to float.

ChatGPT and I | Epilogue

2024-01-27T17:23:00.072+05:30

With ChatGPT being a fad these days, here's a low effort Project on this blog. The concept is simple - I start, ChatGPT finishes. Let us see how AI helps in weaving a story across these 12 months. Expect a chapter each month.

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7, Chapter-8, Chapter-9, Chapter-10, Chapter-11, Chapter-12

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

The night refused him sleep as he delved into a myriad of tasks, successfully checking off each item on his to-do list. Around 4 am, he ventured to her residence, surreptitiously placing an envelope in the milk basket, aware that she would retrieve it in the next hour, following her routine.
Returning home, he swiftly gathered his belongings and summoned a taxi. In the quiet predawn moments, as much of Bangalore slumbered, he remained wide awake, watching the city where he had invested more than a quarter of his life unfold outside the taxi window.

The lingering chill in the Bangalore air hinted at the receding winter, marking the end of the festive season. With the roads bustling again with the rhythm of everyday life, she found solace in the familiarity of their usual coffee spot. Opting for a corner table, she requested a steaming hot cup of filter coffee to combat the remaining cold.
As the aromatic brew arrived, she reached into her bag, extracting an envelope that she had found at her entrance today morning. Imprinted on it were the words - "Open this with a cup of coffee, just like the way we used to meet...".
As she gazed at the typical Bangalore morning traffic from the glass window of the cafe, she carefully tore open the envelope. A gentle curiosity filled the air as she unfolded the A4 sheet, its contents unfolding like a cherished memory. The January breeze carried with it not just the fading chill but also the echoes of their past encounters, blending seamlessly with the warmth of the freshly brewed coffee.

Hi.
Sorry for the trouble. I know that this would be a working day for you, but I wanted you to read this at a place where I could imagine both of us together.

My last year was a roller coaster, so much that it confused not just me, but everyone who knew me. I was about to die but didn't. Instead had a heartbreak. Almost became an alcoholic, depressed to the core. Attempted a murder just out of sheer rage. And then out of nowhere, you arrived in the least probable way. You were a complete stranger but your chose to listen to me. The several months of therapy was a complete waste, but with your presence, I felt confident, positive and looked ahead in life.

It is unfortunate that our relationship could never reach to the point where we could confess our love to each other - but I think that is OK. Life does what it wants to do with itself. We can only control so much.

You will always have a special place in my heart. In spite of me hurting you, wanting to take your life for no reason, you forgave me. You became my friend, my companion, my well-wisher. You pushed me to get that extra serving of sambar for my dipped idli-vada. You took me to art galleries, exhibitions and I learnt to make peace with myself. You too had a past, rather a grim one. But you chose not to share it with me. There are very few people in the world who choose not to bring their troubles on the table when the other person is already discussing theirs. I have learnt a very important life lesson from you.

It is a pity that we never had a picture of us together. Possibly because we were so involved in each other's company that the idea of pulling out the phone and clicking a picture had never even struck to anyone of us. We may not have a captured moment together, but you will always be in my thoughts. I will never forget you and the time that we spent together.

I hope you didn't get married to 'A'. Of course you didn't. Because you couldn't. He didn't return back from his trip to the mountains, did he?

He will not return back. I have made sure. I met him at the same place where I met you the first time. Remember?

And then I did exactly the same thing to him as I did to you. I have made sure that he would not return back. And I have also made sure that no one will bother you ever in future about 'A's absence. Things are taken care of, and you do not need to know how.

I did this because I owe you. I wanted to set you free. Free from a burden that you otherwise would have carried for lifetime. I became a better person because of you - this is the least I could have done.
I spent a lot of thought if I should be telling this to you. But then I realized that a closure does help. This information should help you to move on. So do whatever you can to erase 'A' from your memory. He does not exist anymore.

As for me, by the time you will read this - I would have left this city. I will restart my life. Some place far. And it is good for both of us that we do not meet. I do not want you to owe me anything - like the way it was between you and 'A'. So please consider this a goodbye.

Please keep smiling, please be the way you are - and resume your life on your terms.

And whenever you think about us, just come to this place and have a hot cup of filter coffee with some idli-vada-sambar for me.

Allright then!

Year end post

2023-12-31T18:00:00.000+05:30

This blog started sometime in 2005. In the next two years, it will complete 20 years. It has been active on and off - but that is okay. What matters is that it has lived through a variety of people, topics, films, songs, places and my rant. At some macro level, there is some consistency, right?

In most cultures across the world, the age of 18 makes you an adult - presumably wise enough to make your own decisions, choose your leader, and do other funny things in life. This blog has had similar privileges even before and will continue to live - and continue to have content of its choice. The idea is not to stick to a theme - keep it free, let it float.

These days most apps provide a recap of your yearly activity. What songs did you listen the most, what movies did you like, what content were you most interested in, et al. And that is now one thing that makes you look forward for the year to end. It is very satisfying, self validating. On similar lines, here's the recap of my 2023.

We explored Iran. The time and effort it took to plan the trip was worthwhile. Some videos here.
Experienced a tandem skydive, again a video here.
Finally, forced to cut down sugar and carbs. Some things you have to do as you tend to 40 with a sedentary lifestyle. No video here.
Trekked Annapurna Base Camp, and Alankrit did it too! Mountains make you happier and humbler.
'Resumed' the Youtube Channel. I hope I am getting better with each video. There is still a lot to learn.
Switched to a new work place
Thought about going to the Gym every single day. The thought didn't get executed though.
The 'ChatGPT & I' project was fun. Would love to do it again with a more structured approach.
Planned a last-minute trip, which fizzled out in a funny way just an hour before departure. Lesson learnt the hard way.

For the next year, there is a plan in place. The resolution is to stick to the plan.

As you get older, you tend to demand more value/output from life.

Possibly because in the back of your mind, you start feeling that the time is running out.

And then you start doing funny things.

Not the same ones that you did when you were 18, but still funny.

But I think that is okay. The idea is not to stick to a theme in life too - keep it free, let it float. And keep deriving value/output out of it - based on whatever is your definition of value or output is.

And by the way, here's something that we listened to on a loop. Although Spotify alleged that we bled our ears to AP Dhillon all the time, but we will stick to this one. Do watch this movie, if you haven't - it is pretty intense - especially 'side A'.

ChatGPT and I | December

2023-12-29T07:45:00.002+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7, Chapter-8, Chapter-9, Chapter-10, Chapter-11

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

They continued to meet. A few times the company of 'A' kept their interactions loud and awkward. But things were never the same, even when they met alone. For him, meeting her felt like a formality - just to keep up with the courtship. He remained silent most of the times. Perhaps she felt the same too. The structure of their enjoyment in each other's company, was shattered by the arrival of 'A'. Something was broken - they both knew. And with the limited experience with life, they did not know how to repair it. Possibly it was to be left abandoned.

Such is life. They gave each other time for their relationship to grow. And before they could commit to each other - life happened. He woke up one morning and decided to end their relationship - or whatever it should be called. There was no point to think about sunk costs, time and emotions. He texted her, and they met at their regular coffee place.

"Hi" - she broke the ice, before it got too awkward.

"Hi"

"How are you"?

"Good. How are you?"

"Yeah, things are going on. 'A' is planning for a solo trip, so he's busy with that. Says he hasn't seen India in a while and wants to experience it alone. Asked me some recommendations."

"Nice. What did you recommend him? Taj Mahal?"

"Lol. No. He wanted to go someplace remote. Rural. I recommended him the village where we first met."

"Nice."

They picked up their coffee and took a sip. He was looking for an opportunity to trigger the topic he had in his mind, but couldn't find the moment yet.

"In the 2nd week of Feb next year I am getting married to 'A'. He asked me and I said yes. My parents are beaming with joy and so is he." - she placed the cup back on the table and spoke without a pause.

"Are you happy?"

She did not respond. From the glass wall of the café, she looked down at the road.

"You see all of these people on the road? Each one of them is influencing someone's life. In some way or the other. Good or bad - doesn't matter. What matters is - that they are the center of someone's life. And they play a major role in shaping it."

"Why are you saying this?"

"I want to let you know that you are the center of my life. Whatever you do will change the course of my life. It does not matter if it is good or bad. I will accept it."

She held his hand. A tear trickled down her right eye. He noticed it, but couldn't muster the courage to pacify her.

"I am not sure what to say. You are an amazing girl. You are independent, smart and have a solid career. Why are you doing this? You cannot say no?"

"I owe my life to 'A'. I do not want to disappoint him. I know he will understand. But for the rest of my life, I will never come over the thought of turning him down on one thing he asked from me."

"I understand."

They didn't speak anymore. It was settled. Whatever was between them, it had ended an agreement, without saying anything. Possibly they understood each other more than couples in a 'defined' relationship do.

They sat quietly for a long time, not saying much. The air felt heavy with things they didn't talk about. The smell of coffee mixed with the sadness of their relationship ending. He looked at her, trying to find the right words. They both knew it was time to say goodbye.

While they held hands, they smiled sadly. The smile showed they remembered good times and love, but also that they accepted it was over. Without speaking, they understood each other. Their eyes said what words couldn't. A tear rolled down his cheek, showing how they both felt.

She touched his face, wiping away his tear. It was a gentle way to say goodbye. They smiled at each other, a smile that meant it was the end but also a start of healing.

He stood up, showing it was time to go. She stood up too, and they hugged. The hug was more than just a hug – it was a way to find comfort and to say the words they couldn't. As they let go, their hands held on a little longer, like they didn't want to forget. She took an auto, and he walked away, not sure where he was going. They looked back at each other one last time, silently saying, "Thanks for being part of my life."

She got in the auto, and he kept walking, both feeling the weight of the decision they made. The tears in their eyes showed they were sad, but also that what they had was important. Life would go on, and so would they, but the moments they had would always be remembered in the quiet way they said goodbye.

Concluding part in the next post...

ChatGPT and I | November

2023-11-30T21:44:00.001+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7, Chapter-8, Chapter-9, Chapter-10

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Bangalore was busy celebrating Kannada Rajyotsava. Public holiday. The yellow and reds dominated the city, and the autorickshaw drivers seem to be competing with each other on who's flag was bigger. They met at their regular place. Filter coffee and idli-vada. One dip, one separate. The usual order.

"I hope 'A' is not going to follow you today" - he grinned.

"It's not funny. Ever since he has landed from U.S, I am having sleepless nights." She looked pale, and definitely not her usual self.

"Ok, you wanted to tell me a long story. What is it? What makes this 'A', 'name-and-grade-same-same' guy so special and why does he want to marry you?" - He was in a lighter mood today. A holiday in the middle of the week does wonders to your mood.

She took a deep sigh and started.

"Alright. I will come to the point directly. I was in Kota, preparing for JEE - you already know. Things weren't going well. There was way too much pressure. One day, I skipped a class. Came back to my room. I tied a dupatta to the ceiling fan, prepared a noose and hung myself. Not sure how, but this guy appeared out of nowhere and saved my life. I didn't know him, we had never met earlier. We weren't in the same class, and he didn't live anywhere close to my P.G - but he was there in my room that very moment and rescued me from death. He made sure I was OK, and then made a phone call to my parents, requesting them to come asap. All this happened so quickly that no-one else except him, me and my parents know about this."

There was a pause. She waited for him to digest whatever she said in the last 30 seconds. He stared at her face without a blink.

"And then?" - he asked, his body and face already frozen.

"There's more. Before rescuing me, he clicked a photo of me, while I was hanging, the noose tightened around my neck - trying its best to break it, almost dying - with my eyes bulging out and legs struggling around to seek support. He showed it to me once, jokingly. I've asked him never to speak about it or show it to me ever again. I am not sure if he has deleted that photo now. I don't care. But being my savior, he became part of my family. My parents consider him some Avatar who came to earth just to save me. He is almost a part of my family. Very close to my parents. He is a son they never had. And that is how it is now."

He sat there, his mind reeling from the shocking revelation. The weight of her words hung in the air like a heavy mist. He struggled to process the gravity of the story she had just shared. The atmosphere, once filled with the cheer of the holiday, now carried an undertone of somberness.

"I had no idea," he finally managed to say, his voice a mixture of disbelief and concern.

"I never spoke about it because it's not something I share easily," she explained, her eyes reflecting the pain of that dark period in her life. "But 'A' was there for me when no one else was. He saved me, and for that, my family and I are indebted to him."

Still grappling with the shock, he gathered his thoughts and asked the question that lingered in the air, "Do you want to get married to him?"

She looked at him, her gaze steady. "He's a good person at heart, just a bit whimsical at times and speaks too much, but I don't see him as my life partner."

His curiosity piqued, he pressed further, "But, do you want to get married to him?"

A thoughtful expression crossed her face, and she replied, "It's very tricky," leaving an air of ambiguity that only deepened his confusion. The abrupt silence that followed was pregnant with unspoken words, and he found himself lost in a whirlwind of emotions.

He searched her eyes for clarity, but they revealed nothing more....

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | October

2023-10-31T22:00:00.001+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7, Chapter-8, Chapter-9

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

The two cups of filter coffee were lying on the table, untouched ever since it arrived. The idli and vada had already gone cold, uneaten. Both of them kept looking at each other - at different times. Establishing an eye contact was difficult in this moment.

There was a third cup of coffee too, held by a hand. The hand belonged to a well groomed man, wearing a dark blue hoodie, almost the same age as them. "By the way, I am 'A'. Yeah, call me 'A'. Name and Grade, same-same. Always number one! Nice tagline, right? Hahaha..."

'A' seemed to be enjoying his filter coffee, closing his eyes and doing an 'aaah' after every gulp. "So I decided to follow her today, and I got to meet you both! Nice na? In fact, it is a surprise for her too! I landed in Bangalore early morning today! Feel like sleeping, but I think that is OK. After all, I came all the way from the US to meet her, right? - The caffeine was doing its magic on 'A', and he continued to talk.

"Yaar, this filter coffee cannot match any 'chino' in this world. I will have one more cup. How about you guys? Your coffee is getting cold. Finish it, we will order one more round! Chalo, chalo, fast! You see, it is so difficult to meet her friends! She never talks about them to me at all!" - 'A' joked as he finished his coffee, and placed the empty cup on the table, and continued to talk.

"Well, now that we are here, would you introduce your friend to me? Oh wait, I am getting a call... and... looks like... I... will... have... to... take-this-one, yeah. Give me 5 minutes, I will be back. And guys, your coffee is getting cold. Finish it fast, we will have one more cup! I will be back, give me 10 minutes....hey hi...yeah yeah I was about to call you but this coffee.. yaar this filter coffee here in Bangalore is...." - 'A' moved outside hurriedly as he continued the conversation on his phone.

As 'A' left, their gazes met. He had questions, and she clearly looked embarrassed.

"Who is this verbal diarrhea?" he asked.

"I was about to tell you. Its a long story. Maybe we meet tomorrow? There is something that I wanted to tell you but I never had a chance."

"And did I hear it wrong? He 'followed' you here? Wow! Anyways, tell me a little bit now, so that its not awkward to speak to him when he is back."

"You can consider him as my family friend. Long story. Don't worry, you just need to nod. He will do most of the talking himself. He is used to it." she smiled nervously.

Still reeling from the shock of a new character arriving in their present life, they sat quietly, waiting for 'A' to return back from his phone call.

Ten minutes later, 'A' returned to the table with his ever-present grin. He sat down and, with the same enthusiasm, continued the conversation, but this time, he took it in a different direction.

"So, you won't believe what happened to me in Tokyo! I got stuck there for a day and had to eat some leftover sushi from a street vendor. Let me tell you, it was the best sushi I've ever had, and I've had a lot in the States!" 'A' launched into a detailed story about his Tokyo experience.

Before the Tokyo story got deeper, she saw an opportunity to formally introduce 'A' to him. "Umm...I didn't get a chance to introduce you two properly. This is 'A,' and we've known each other since our days in Kota when we were preparing for JEE together. 'A' moved to the USA six years ago. And 'A', this is my friend, he works in Bangalore and lives nearby."

Still a bit confused by the sudden turn of events and a clumsy introduction by her, he added, "Nice to meet you, 'A.' Sounds like you've got some exciting stories to tell! So when did you..."

'A' interrupted him and held her hand. "You know what? I've been thinking a lot, and I've decided to come back to India for good. I want to get married to you, settle down in Bangalore, and start a new chapter of my life here. What do you say?"

With 'A' indirectly proposing to her, an awkward silence filled the air. Both of them exchanged confused looks, not sure how to react to this unexpected revelation.

'A' quickly sensed the discomfort and changed the subject, returning to his usual energetic speech. "Anyway, tell me about your work and life, my friends. I want to know you folks better! Its so nice to be here, I think I should have come back in 2020 itself! So, how is the post-COVID scene here? Still work-from-home or back-to-office?"

And before anyone could speak, 'A' started sharing stories and talking about his own tendency to talk too much, not allowing the others to get a word in.

While 'A' continued with his monologue, both of them sat still, trying to process the sudden arrival of 'A' and the unexpected news that he shared. 'A' didn't seem bothered by the tension and signaled a passing waiter, ordering filter coffee for all three of them while poking fun at the cold idli-sambar that sat ignored on their table.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | September

2023-09-30T18:10:00.001+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7, Chapter-8

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Their first meet led to another, and the another led to the other. The unknown number he had received that WhatsApp message from eventually turned into a saved, and a frequently dialed contact in his phone.

In their first few meets he did the talking most of the time. After 8 months of internalizing, he vented out all that was in his mind in front of her. She listened. And that was all he needed. He felt healthier and slept well. There was no need of alcohol anymore. He looked forward to get out of office early, and waited eagerly for the weekends.

They met at least two to three times every week. She took him to art galleries, classical dance performances and poetry recitals across Bangalore. She was an art enthusiast. Loved spending her time looking at paintings, talking about them endlessly. This was something that he had never done before - but he was liking all of this change in his life. Life felt so full and positive after a while to him. He had submitted himself to her interests. He was almost like a baby - no opinions, no choices - just experiences that filled him with curiosity and awe. He could feel the goosebumps as he listened to music recommended by her. Her messages during work brought a smile to his face. All these experiences gave him a frequent dose of the Dopamine-Serotonin-Endorphin-Oxytocin cocktail.

And somewhere, very faintly, his mind could hear the violins in the background.

One early evening, they sat at Nagarjuna, savoring their Andhra meals after a poetry recital event. And while the second helping of steamed rice was on its way, they struck into a conversation.

He: You know, I've realized that in all our meetings, I've done most of the talking. I'd love to hear more about you. Tell me about your life.

She: Well, I grew up in a typical Indian middle-class family. We never had money problems, but there wasn't much to splurge on either. I spent two years in Kota preparing for JEE, couldn't crack the IITs, so I did my engineering from a small college. After that, I moved to Bangalore for work.

He: Kota, huh? That must have been quite an experience.

She: It was challenging, for sure, but it taught me a lot. More stories about that some other time. And engineering was a logical choice in our family. What about you?

He: I did engineering too, but I've always been a city boy. Bangalore's been my home for a while now.

As they chatted, the conversation took an intriguing turn.

She: You know, I've noticed something about you. You're always so hesitant to ask people for things, even for simple favors.

He giggled - "I knew you will bring this up. You're talking about the time I ran out of sambar at the restaurant, right? I didn't ask for more, even though it was free."

She: Exactly! Why do you do that? Is it the fear of rejection or just avoiding conflict?

He: It's a bit of both, I guess. When something is chargeable, I don't mind paying for it because it feels transactional. But when it's free, I hesitate because it feels like asking for a favor, and I get too hesitant to be demanding. You know, as strange as it may sound, I'm okay with it. It's not too much of a hassle to make peace with the situation and live with it. I mean, I'm more than happy to adjust and eat my remaining dosa without the sambar.

She: You're quite the sambar martyr, aren't you?

He: I guess you could say that. But life's too short to worry about the small stuff, right?

She: True, true. But with my company, there will be a day when you'll change. At least you'll develop the courage to ask for that extra sambar. I just know it!

He: (Raising an eyebrow) You're that confident, huh?

As they continued talking and relishing the hot rice and daal, the conversation flowed effortlessly. The delectable food proved irresistible, and their banana-leaf-plates gradually emptied as they chatted and laughed. It wasn't until they both realized that they had eaten a bit too much that they decided it was time head back home.

With satisfied smiles, they ordered some chilled fresh lime soda, perfect way to cap off their delightful dinner.

As they left the restaurant, the night air felt crisp, and the stars above seemed to twinkle with approval. With full stomachs and even fuller hearts, they headed back home, content in each other's company and excited for the journey that lay ahead.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | August

2023-08-31T08:30:00.007+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6, Chapter-7

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Restless and nervous he already had been; and that Whatsapp message took his impatience to the next level. On the day of the meet, he made up his mind to face the worst that could happen. It was highly possible that he might not return home, and be sent straight to a lockup. Getting blackmailed or mugged was probable too - but he wanted closure. No matter what, he decided to take a plunge at what was coming to his life in the next few hours.

Instead of driving that day, he hailed an auto rickshaw. He ensured that there was nothing else with him except his phone and some INR in cash. No credit cards, no wallet. He changed his phone to a cheap feature phone for that day. There was some thought around keeping a small knife and a pepper spray - but he decided against it. Anyone confronting him with intention to harm would be better equipped and prepared, and would probably have more experience in assault than him.

He left things to his fate. Afterall, he had been lucky enough so far in life, maybe this would sail through too.

Even with all this preparedness, his mind played tricks on him. As he reached the coffee shop, he could hear his heartbeat louder than the noise of the traffic. All the other sounds seemed muffled. He suddenly felt weak and his eyes went blurry. He stumbled and clumsily sat at the steps, rubbed his palms and cupped his eyes.

Breathe in, breathe out.

Breathe in breathe out.

Breathe in, breathe out.

After a minute or two, he felt better and got up - still holding the handrail. And then, he entered the coffee shop cautiously. He looked at his watch, he was early by 10 minutes.

The coffee shop was practically empty, with just one corner table occupied - someone sipping from a cup. The sight of the person made him freeze at the door. His face went pale. With him right under the intense flow of chilled air from the AC vent, a few drops of sweat trickled from his forehead.

She was sitting facing towards the door, confident, a wry smile on her lips. As he approached, his voice quivered.

"Hi, I... I'm not sure if..." he began, his confusion palpable.

"Hello there! Long time no see." she greeted him with an unsettling cheerfulness.

"Hi... I... uh..."

With a casual wave of her hand, she reassured him, "Oh, don't be so jittery. Have a seat. Coffee's on me."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to... I can't even explain..."

"It's alright, really. I'm not here for revenge. I just want to talk."

He heaved a sigh of relief, "Thank you. I'm so sorry."

"You're quite different from what I expected," she teased, a playful glint in her eye.

"Different? I mean, I'm just..."

"...an average Indian software guy. I've been watching you, stalking - I'd rather say. You wouldn't even muster the courage to ask for a second helping of sambar with your dosa, would you?" She interrupted him.

He admitted sheepishly, "No, I guess not."

With a chuckle, she continued, "See, I knew it! So mister wannabe serial killer, why did you try to kill me?"

"I don't know. I can't understand it myself."

"You know, you're lucky I didn't report you to the police," she said casually.

"Why didn't you?"

Her tone remained light-hearted, "Oh, you see, We are all just common Indian citizen. We have limited time and resources. I didn't want to get into all that hassle. Would you?"

He expressed gratitude, "I'm thankful for that. I don't know how I could ever make amends."

"That night," she began, "it took me some time to figure out what happened. I remember feeling feverish and stumbled to the nearest house for help. The owner of the house knew the place well and was kind enough to drop me to safety."

He looked astonished, "I thought you were dead."

"Well, I wasn't. And I'm here now." she replied, a beaming smile.

"You've been through a lot, haven't you?" she asked suddenly, her voice soft with compassion. "Tell me, what made you want to hurt me that night?"

Tears welled up in his eyes as he confessed, his voice trembling, "I don't know... I was going through a dark phase, and I just... I didn't mean to..."

With a reassuring hand on his, she whispered, "It's okay. Let it out."

And at that very moment, he broke down, his tears mingling with the coffee stains on the table. She remained composed, providing him with the space he needed to confront his guilt and emotions.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | July

2023-07-31T20:30:00.019+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5, Chapter-6

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

He had stepped out for an evening break with his colleagues. And as they all sipped the sugary syrup with strong notes of tea and ginger, they talked about how half of 2023 had already flown away. Unused gym memberships, books bought but never opened, courses left mid-way and unattended KPIs at work - everyone had a similar rant.

He thought about himself. What did these six months of 2023 do to him? He survived a terminal illness, got dumped by the love of his life, spent a few weeks in the Himalayas, and also impulsively killed a stranger. Very happening life. Life felt to him as if he was a character of some middle-aged-software-guy writing a low effort fiction as a respite from the mundane routine of working through excel spreadsheets and presentations.

"Hey, what about you bro? What's happening with you these days? You went to some resort recently, right?" - a gentle pat on his back brought him back from the world of his thoughts. "Yeah, nothing else, same old..." - he said, and sipped his tea. Someone else interjected, and the conversation continued - without him. These social interactions are just pointless - he thought.

With him back in Bangalore from his 'adventurous' holiday, there was something that was still biting him at the back of his mind. There was no news of any dead body being found in the village the next day, after whatever had happened at that ominous night. He spoke to his host - but didn't hear anything from him. It made him even more anxious.

Was it possible that the body got dragged away to the forest by some wild animal?
Or did someone else get framed of the crime he had committed?
Was getting away from a murder was so easy?
Or was it just a lull before he is apprehended by the police?

His mind cooked up endless possibilities. But these possibilities were just questions. And he needed answers.

As the days went by, the confusion in his mind started eating him from within. He became excessively alert of the people and situations around himself. He felt that he was being watched and talked about. That his every activity was being judged. All the eyes in the world were over him. Someday, someone would just walk upto him and ask him about what had happened on his 'vodka shopping' night. Every morning, before he left for work, he made doubly sure to check if the windows were locked. Curtains and blinds in his apartment kept the window covered. Whenever he took a break in the office, he came back to his desk and checked his bags thoroughly - just in case someone had left a note in there.

He felt as if he was being followed. While waiting at traffic signals, he suspected that the drivers of the adjacent vehicles were watching him. Walking across busy streets, in the malls, shops, gym - even in the office - he felt spotlighted. He quit drinking completely - just to be in his senses all the time, staying alert and pick up cues on anything unusual around him - even when he was at home. And sleep - already being a problem, became worse.

Weeks passed, but the feeling of being watched persisted for him. It was subtle, just at the edge of his consciousness, like a faint whisper in the back of his mind. He couldn't put a finger on it, and it was driving him to the brink of paranoia. He started taking different routes home from work, looking over his shoulder more frequently, and checking behind curtains before going to bed. Each night, he would lie awake, staring at the ceiling, his mind plagued with unsettling thoughts.

Amidst all this, the mystery of the murder weighed heavily on his conscience. He couldn't shake the image of that fateful night from his memory. The haunting thought that he might have taken a life kept him up at night. He found himself increasingly revisiting the events of that night, trying to analyze every minute detail, searching for clues that might have been missed. But the more he dwelled on it, the murkier the waters became.

One evening, as the sun dipped below the horizon, his phone buzzed with a new message notification. It was a WhatsApp message from an unknown number. His heart skipped a beat as he opened the chat:

"Meet me at the Midnight Brews coffee shop, August 1 at 9 PM. Come alone"

His mind raced with questions. Who could have sent this message? Was it someone who knew about the incident? Or was it a trap set to lure him into a compromising situation? As much as he felt the urge to ignore it and forget about the whole thing, curiosity and a desire for answers got the better of him.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | June

2023-06-30T20:30:00.002+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4, Chapter-5

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

He opened his eyes as the early morning rays of the sun fell on his face. He had slept late, probably two hours back. Since last month, he had been facing trouble in falling asleep. A therapist had asked him to get a change of scene, and here he was - in a quaint old village in the belt of the Himalayas with a handful of backpackers and young solo travelers.

But then, nothing had changed - except for the majestic snow capped peaks even in the month of June. He still felt lonely and miserable, had trouble falling asleep, and vodka had become a good companion. Even with more than fifteen days of fresh air, serenity and good food around him - he felt empty. If this was something that people long for - he wondered what else he could do to make him feel better.

He spent his mornings nibbling over the hot breakfast served to him in the garden of his homestay. A few kilometers of hiking and then he would head back to his room for lunch. He spent a few hours working on his laptop - thanks to the 'workation' policy his office had rolled out recently. Evenings, he used to sit in the garden with a hot cup of coffee watching the sun disappearing behind the mountain peaks. He had carried a few books - which he never even opened. There was enough to keep him busy during the day. And evenings were a light dinner with a mandatory gulp of 60ml of vodka to help him sleep - which obviously didn't.

A change of scene - yes. A change of mood - probably no.

That day went by with its regular routine. Breakfast, hike, lunch, work, sunset, coffee. But there was a disruption. He was out of vodka. And the nearest liquor shop was about three kilometers away. Although it was dark, and nights were quiet and unhappening in this village, he decided to take a walk and see if he could replenish his stock. A late dinner would be OK, he thought to himself. He stepped out of his room quietly, as he didnt want to bother his host.

He walked through the narrow lanes of the village long after the sun had gone down. The dark night closed in around him, intensifying his feelings of emptiness and anger. As he turned a corner, his footsteps echoed in the quiet, and there, against a wall, sat a girl carrying a backpack. The faint light from her phone revealed her face.

His heart raced. She bore an uncanny resemblance to his ex-girlfriend, the one who had callously shattered his heart without any reason. Anger surged within him, mingling with the pain he had carried for months. It felt as if his ex-girlfriend's betrayal had materialized before him in the form of this girl.

Alone in that desolate alley, the girl looked up at him with confusion. "Excuse me," she said softly, her voice hesitant. "I'm new here and I seem to have lost my way. My phone doesn't have any network. Could you help me find this address?"

The world around them seemed to fade away, leaving only him and the girl standing there. His anger swelled, not just towards her, but towards himself. How could he have let himself become consumed by such rage and bitterness? The pain from his past coursed through him, fueling his frantic actions.

Consumed by a whirlwind of rage and anguish, he lunged at her, his hands closing around her delicate throat. She gasped for air, fear reflecting in her eyes as she fought against his grip, but her struggles proved futile against his overpowering strength.

And then, it was over. Life slipped away from her eyes, leaving behind only the hollowness that had consumed him for far too long. The darkness concealed his actions, as if the night itself conspired to bury his sins.

He made his way back to his room, feeling a disturbing calm settle within him. Sleep came easily that night - as everything around him disappeared, replaced by a calm nothingness that provided a short-lived escape from his troubled life.

tbc...

Cross-post from Instagram #20 | Iran

2023-06-10T18:00:00.000+05:30

Iran would possibly be one of the most unplanned travels we've ever taken. We travelled to Iran in the last week of April this year. To be honest - we had no clarity on where to travel till the end of March. All we had with us a return ticket to UAE (which was just a transit) - all the other travel itineraries beyond UAE had to be either cancelled or shelved due to various reasons.

So, Iran happened - literally by just looking at the world map.

Getting a visa required us an unplanned drive to Hyderabad and finally a hurried up day-wise itinerary closed our scope of trip. With all the entropy, the travel was still a superb experience. Iran takes a special place in our heart - a great destination, and indeed very underrated. And hence this post.

Here's our route. We started from Shiraz, and took a road trip till Tehran. The videos are still WIP - it will possibly take a few more weeks to publish them.

Meanwhile, here are some pictures - cross posted from Instagram.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek)

ChatGPT and I | May

2023-05-31T21:00:00.025+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3, Chapter-4

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Chapter-5

Loneliness crept into his life slowly. Work kept him busy, but he longed for company. Roughly a month after he broke up with her, he re-activated his dating app. He felt like someone applying for a job after a significant hiatus - unsure, nervous, but eager to take up any opportunity that came across.

Finding someone that matched his wavelength was difficult. He did not want to be rude and played along during his dates with the matches. And during these times, he discovered that he was allergic to cat fur, a spoonful of chocolate maggi was enough to make him puke, and vodka + buttermilk was a surprisingly pleasant combination.

There was someone who he felt he liked spending time with - but things took a different turn when she asked him buy a few things off the 'dark net' on her behalf. He took that as a red flag and exited the short courtship.

In all, he spent most of his off work hours swiping through matches. Sometimes he thought of her - but that was past long gone. She was already married and must be happy in her own new world. And here he was, all alone, trying out his luck on a dating app. With all these hit and miss events, he finally decided to un-install this wretched dating app.

One late evening, as he reached home - he realized that he lost the keys to his apartment. He re-looked all his pockets, frantically searched his bag - but couldn't find the keys. He went back to the office, checked his desk and around. The smoking area where he smoked a few cigarettes during the day. Checked with housekeeping and security. But the key was not found. Bewildered, hungry and tired, he felt that he had no energy to call a locksmith and enter his apartment. He checked-in to a hotel right beside his office and ordered a lot of food to call it a day.

Over the next few weeks, his life continued to be mundane. He woke up early, went to work, ate his meals alone, and spent his evenings watching TV shows or reading books. He didn't feel like going out and socializing with anyone.

One day, on his way to work, he realized that he had forgotten his wallet and phone at home. He couldn't buy his usual chai from the tea-stall near his office. He felt miserable the whole day, hungry and thirsty. He made a mental note to double-check his pockets before leaving the house in the future.

The following week, he had to attend a mandatory office party. He felt out of place and awkward the whole time, not knowing what to talk about with his colleagues. He ended up leaving early, feeling like he wasted his time and energy.

Another time, he planned to try a new restaurant that had recently opened in his neighborhood. He got there, ordered his food, and was disappointed to find that it wasn't as good as he expected. He regretted spending his money on a mediocre meal and went back home feeling unsatisfied.

Days turned into weeks, and his life continued to be a routine of work, eat, and sleep. He didn't know how to break out of this cycle and felt like he was stuck in a rut. He started to wonder if this was all that life had to offer.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | April

2023-04-30T14:27:00.002+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2, Chapter-3

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Chapter-4

The last conversation with her left him bruised. But it was not much in comparison to this surgery he had to undergo. He prepped himself and admitted himself in the hospital. The very next day was his surgery. And five days later, he would emerge as someone who would continue to exist in the world for the next few decades. For anyone else, it would be like knowing that they would be winning a lottery, only waiting for the results to be announced. But for him - the rest of his life seemed a black hole.

He hadn't spoken to her ever since the break up. She must have tried reaching out to him - he had blocked her the moment she sat in an auto rickshaw to head back home after their conversation. He was still not sure why she broke up with him. He wanted answers. But he wasnt heartbroken or sad. He had thought through and sucked up the reality. There was no point in looking back, although life ahead of him was a bit empty.

The procedure went well. He was discharged from the hospital within five days. For the next six months, some medicines and regular follow ups. The doctors had given him a short list of 'what to avoid' - but that was just precautionary. He felt positive about himself.

The Bangalore summer was showing the signs of its arrival. Instagram was filled with reels of people posing under cherry blossoms. She would have coaxed him to do the same, and he would have complied. But now, things were different. He focused on his health and gave more time tohis career and work. The support his employer and colleagues had shown him during the last few months - he felt indebted and wanted to do his bit as much possible.

One day, while scrolling through social media, he saw a post from her. It was a picture of her smiling with a caption that read, "Finally found the one." He felt a pang of jealousy and sadness, but tried to brush it off. However, as he kept scrolling, he saw more posts from her, all featuring her with the same person. He couldn't help but feel curious, and decided to click on her profile.

To his surprise, he saw that she had gotten married just a few weeks ago. He felt a mix of emotions - shock, disbelief, and a tinge of sadness. He realized that she must have broken up with him to be with this person, and he had no idea that she had already found someone else so soon after their breakup.

As he closed his phone, he realized that his life was not a black hole anymore. He was grateful for his health, his job, and the people in his life who supported him. And although it hurt to see her move on so quickly, he knew that he too would find happiness in his own way, and that his future was still bright.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | March

2023-03-31T00:30:00.005+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1, Chapter-2

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Chapter-3

A month had passed by since he had confessed about his terminal illness to her. The confession helped. He felt lighter, happier. The fact that him not existing in this world by end of 2023 often made him sad. But he was happy to have her by his side. The doctors had given him 10 months to live - beyond that, anything was a bonus. Although, the illness did not demand him to be hospitalized or bedridden all the time. He managed his work with very little discomfort.

He wished to spend the rest of his life with her, travel the world, get older with her - but he had accepted that it was not going to be possible. With her, he never talked about his imminent death. And she never brought the topic herself. Both knew. But both wanted to make most of the time at hand. The typical Bollywood movie melodrama of them hugging each other and shedding tears never happened. And they never wanted it too.

She accompanied him to treatments. She made sure he had his meds on time. He had a very strict, lean diet - she ensured that he ate well. But at the same time she was assertive to deny herself being available - whenever she had work or other appointments. It was like they understood each other so well - there was no conflict, there were no arguments. Only agreements. Possibly something good that happens in relationships that involve terminal illnesses.

One day, he received a phone call from his doctor. The doctor informed him that there had been a mistake in his diagnosis and that he actually had a completely treatable condition. All he needed was a simple surgery, and he would be completely cured.

He was ecstatic. He had been living with the fear of death looming over him for so long, and now he could finally let go of it. He immediately called her to tell her the good news.

But when he told her, she didn't seem as happy as he had expected her to be. In fact, she seemed almost distant.

"What's wrong?" he asked her.

"I don't know if I can do this," she said quietly.

"Do what?" he asked, confused.

"Be with you," she said, tears streaming down her face. "I fell in love with you when I thought we only had a limited amount of time together. I don't know if I can handle the thought of a lifetime with you."

He was devastated. He had always assumed that she would be overjoyed at the prospect of spending more time with him. But now, he didn't know what to do. He loved her deeply, but he didn't want to force her to stay with him if she wasn't truly happy.

As they sat in silence, he couldn't help but wonder what their future held. Would she leave him? Would he ever find someone who loved him for who he was, rather than for the expiration date he had been given? Only time would tell.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | February

2023-02-28T23:06:00.003+05:30

Link to previous chapters:

Chapter-1

Please note that the ChatGPT response may be slightly modified to align the context wherever applicable.

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

Chapter-2

That day the meetings stretched longer than usual.

He pinged her on WhatsApp and asked her out for a dinner that night. The single tick to a double gray tick to a double blue tick took the entire day. He messaged in the morning, and she replied back in the evening. And by that time, his calendar was full with evening meetings. He went ahead and declined all of them, feigning an upset stomach.

"Tonight I will tell her..." - he thought to himself. He had been pondering over this since the last year. The entire January was spent in heavy introspection and he had finally decided to choose being honest about his situation.

They met at the mall close to her office. Both carried their laptop bags. Both looked tired. But were happy to see each other.

"I cancelled all my meetings tonight" - he said. "I didn't cancel, but will not join" - she winked.

"I am dying." - he said.

"Yeah me too. Haven't eaten all day. And the service is so slow here. At least should have served some papad." - she muttered while her fingers mercilessly shredded the paper napkin she was fidgeting with.

He giggled. Not the kind of response he expected. He decided to park this discussion and wait for the food to arrive. Conversations about terminal illness and death do not go well with a hungry stomach.

He decided to change the topic.

As they sat and talked about their day, he couldn't help but feel a strong connection with her. He loved her wit and her intelligence. He also admired her passion for her work, even though it often meant sacrificing time with him.

As they finished their meal, he took a deep breath and mustered up the courage to bring up the topic of his illness again. He told her everything, from the symptoms he had been experiencing to the prognosis given by his doctor. She listened intently, and when he finished, she took his hand and simply said, "I'm here for you. No matter what."

As they walked hand in hand back to their respective homes, he couldn't help but think that he was the luckiest man in the world to have found such a wonderful person in his life. And no matter what the future held, he knew that he was grateful for every moment they had together.

From that evening, they became each other's rock. They supported each other through the ups and downs of his treatment, and he was amazed at her unwavering love and strength. Even though he knew there would be tough days ahead, he felt grateful to have her by his side.

tbc...

ChatGPT and I | January

2023-01-31T21:30:00.024+05:30

The text in black is me. ChatGPT is in blue.

This should be very easy. Let us see.

He was happy and sad.

At the same time.

So happy - that he could not make a choice whether he wanted his idli vada to be 'dipp' or separate.

So sad - that he could not make a choice whether he wanted his idli vada to be 'dipp' or separate.

The new year had kicked in. But the recurring meetings at work were still the ones that were scheduled from the last year. Same agenda. Similar problems. Almost the same team. But yet the year was new. He locked his laptop with a quick 'Windows + L' and headed to the chaiwala adjacent to his office. He lit a Classic Milds and picked up the small paper cup brimming with hot, acidity causing, teeth staining chai.

- -

As he took a sip of the chai, he couldn't help but think about the choices he had to make in the coming year. He knew that he had to make some big decisions and it was weighing heavily on him. He couldn't help but feel like he was stuck in a rut, and that nothing was going to change.

He took another sip of chai and looked around at the busy street. People were hurrying to and fro, all with their own problems and decisions to make. He realized that he wasn't alone in his struggles, and that everyone had to make choices at some point in their lives.
As he finished his chai and cigarette, he made up his mind. He knew that he had to take control of his own life and make the choices that were best for him, no matter how difficult they may be. He felt a sense of determination and purpose wash over him, and knew that he was ready to face the new year head on.
He threw away the cigarette and headed back to his office, feeling a renewed sense of energy and optimism. He knew that he couldn't change everything overnight, but he was ready to take the first step towards a better future. He opened his laptop and got back to work, ready to tackle whatever the new year had in store for him.

tbc...

Year end post

2023-01-01T22:00:00.002+05:30

Technically, only two posts in 2022. This is a third one, but doesn't count as it is 2023 already. Year end post is now a ritual on this blog - where I rant about my year and nobody reads.

So, 2022. How was it?

A quick and restricted travel to Pakistan (namesake) in March and Uzbekistan + Kyrgyztan in June made 2022 the year of the 'stans' for us
One of our longest self drive: Bangalore - Pune - Bangalore happened in April. Would definitely sign up to go farther
Discovered Bali - both touristy and non touristy spots
Shunned the DSLR - a phone and a GoPro will be the way forward
Bought a drone. Lost the drone. Bought a drone again. Some things are learned the hard way
Explored a few cities of Rajasthan - some snippets here

Beyond this, it was all work and more work. And that is how 2022 flew. Today we start with a clean slate. It is the same slate that we have wiped with the last year's scribbles.

With the beginning of the new year, I am thankful to each element - living or non living from this universe that has influenced my life to reach to what I am at this moment. I am fortunate enough to not have to worry for bare necessities in life. This evening, I have the liberty to spare time sitting and typing this content with no intent to monetize it. I cannot be more thankful about this.

Unfortunately, there is no user manual for life - there is no step by step guideline of improving oneself. What you listen and read - is just perspective. There is no one definition. With this lack of documentation, I can only be mindful of being a better person each day. With my own definition. With my own perspective.

So, 2023. Clean slate. New beginnings. New experiences. New learnings. New music. New places to go. Life has to get better and better with each passing day. There is no choice.

And yes, here's something that Spotify kept popping in its playlist since we kept requesting.

Cross-post from Instagram #19 | Uzbekistan (transit), Kyrgyztan

2022-07-17T07:14:00.001+05:30

Apparently 2022 is the year of the 'stans'. If we count Pakistan (March 2022, a touch-and-go visit), the trip in June added two other 'stans' to our travel diary - Uzbekistan and Kyrgyztan. Most other places we would be interested in were still yet to open up post pandemic. With lesser options, arriving to a decision is always easier.

Travel to Uzbekistan was almost a transit in Tashkent - with a short trip to Samarkand and Bukhara. The other regions of this beautiful country are reserved for some other time in the future. There are a few other 'stans' that are in the list and Uzbekistan happens to be a good strategic transit point for us.

However, the major highlight of this trip was Kyrgyztan. While I consider the entire New Zealand to be one big manicured garden, I'd say Kyrgyztan is one large picnic spot. We drove around two major lakes of the country, covered some distance via horses and tried quite a few local cuisines. Additionally, we also did nothing - which is primarily what you do at a picnic.

Here's our route across the terrain of Kyrgyztan - starting from Bishkek, ending in Bishkek. Multiple picnics on the way.

While some things during the Russia trip of 2015 were missed out - Kyrgyztan helped us to check those off the list. Visiting a Banya, spotting Lenin and Yuri Gagarin busts on the way, visiting a Soviet era antique store, shooting an AK-47 - the checklist is almost complete. Almost. Visiting a place that was once part of the Soviet Union is always a delight.

Like always, here are some pictures. Shot primarily via smartphones and a GoPro Hero 10.

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4 kilometers inside Pakistan

2022-04-15T07:41:00.001+05:30

Pakistan has been on our list of 'travel to' countries since a few years. But there is a challenge. With an Indian passport it is very unlikely to get a tourist visa as a common Indian traveler.

We made an attempt sometime in 2019. Albeit a little half hearted, this attempt turned itself into a weird situation and we decided to park the idea till the two countries made amends. The thought doesn't look promising, but there is always hope which can sit in your mind without any cost. And hope doesn't need a visa either.

This year in March we stepped onto the other side of the Radcliffe line. Into Pakistan. Into. It was a limited/restricted visit in a way. But yes, as an Indian it does give a sense of thrill to cross the border and be greeted by the 'janaabs' on the other side.

Here are some details of the travel and what we did to materialize it.

Where in Pakistan?

The Kartarpur Sahib Gurudwara is located in Narowal district, in the Punjab province of Pakistan. It is roughly 4 kms from the India Pakistan border, within the boundaries of Pakistan. In 2019 the corridor was inaugurated to welcome Indians for a pilgrimage to the shrine. It requires an advance Electronic Travel Approval (ETA) and the typical immigration formalities on the either sides of the border.

The Kartarpur Sahib Gurudwara, Narowal, Pakistan

As of today, the corridor is functional and open for Indians. Here's a map to give some perspective.

Tell us how to get in?

The steps to plan this trip are very simple.

Choose your travel dates.
Apply for an ETA on this portal run by the Ministry of Home Affairs, India
Cooperate with the local police/intelligence for your background verification
Wait for the ETA confirmation
If confirmed, pack your bags and travel to Amritsar, Punjab
On the day of the visit, clear your immigration formalities
Reach the border gates
'GO TO PAKISTAN!'

Been there, done that. How was the experience?

Unless you have a relative to meet or business relations, travel to Pakistan is a far fetched idea for a common Indian. Putting that into perspective, visiting Kartarpur Sahib was indeed a thrilling experience. Of course, you are not allowed to step beyond the Gurudwara premises. But crossing the border, being welcomed by the Pakistani rangers, chit chats with their immigration officers and meeting the common civilians in the Gurudwara is indeed a good experience.

The open gates ready to welcome you

Left leg - Pakistan, Right Leg - India

Inside Pakistan.

The Tourist Police of Pakistan giving a short orientation on the entrance

Blue lanyard - Pakistan, Yellow lanyard - India.

Some tuck shops setup within Gurudwara premises

Entry and Exit stamps - not on the passport unfortunately

And by the way, the Kartarpur corridor is still not crowded yet. This allows you to freely spend time on the borders. The BSF jawaans or the Pakistani Rangers will not object unless you do something law breaking. They are patient and will wait for you to cross the border at your pace. So take selfies. Click photos. Cross the line back and forth. Possibly even play hopscotch (this one, at your own risk).

Is there anything else we need to know?

Yes, some things to be kept in mind:

This will be a day trip. You are not allowed to stay overnight. The last bus from Kartarpur towards the border is around 4 PM.
You are not allowed to cross the premises of the Kartarpur Gurudwara. In a way this is a restricted visit.
One needs to be mindful of the fact that the place being visited is revered by people and is the resting place of Guru Nanak. The intent to open the borders between the two nations is pilgrimage. Act accordingly and be respectful.
Refrain from engaging in political discussions and avoid topics that may not be healthy for either of the nations.

So, has Pakistan been ticked off from our list? Nope. We hope to cross the line again, stay for a few days. Get to breathe the air on the other side again. All with an Indian passport, duly stamped. We hope for the situations to get better with time.

Like I said earlier - hope doesn't need a visa and can stay with us forever.

Year end post

2022-01-02T08:24:00.000+05:30

Delayed, but this is the 2nd and the final post for 2021. And there is this dilemma on what should even be the primary content of this post. My readers are extremely few and as such blogs are on a dying trend. Someone reading a blog is rare when there is this limitless ad-hoc masala served through various apps and YouTube vlogs.

However I have no plans to move to any other platform - it needs more time and effort. Probably content too. I would still prefer to keep this blog alive. This is one activity I would cling on to - even if I do not post frequently.

So, 2021. A summary follows below:

A very busy year at work. Most of which was spent in flattening a bunch of data. It may consume some part of 2022 as well.
The 2nd wave of COVID-19 made us sit at home and witness the chaos and misery around.
We celebrated getting Covishield shots just like passing a difficult exam.
Revenge travel took us taking almost a step into the PoK in the north of India. Some relatively more friendly neighbors around the Laccadive Sea and Indian Ocean also helped us to cope with the travel void created by 2020.
My month-wise plan of certain targets/personal projects failed miserably.
I listened to a bunch of audiobooks. They worked really well for me. I was able to finally complete reading/listening to The Fountainhead (had left it midway in 2012). Also - Murakami's works in audio are a must try experience.

This year I turned 37. The progress bar of life right now probably tends to 50% here and there. There still is so much to see and do in life. The bucket list keeps getting appended with newer items. But at the same time I am grateful of the fact that this list also gets its fair share of items checked off too. I cannot be thankful enough for that. I look forward to 2022, and hope that there is lesser chaos an much peace in the world as compared to the past two years.

And like every other year end posts, here's a song that we discovered in 2021 and kept requesting our devices to play.

2020(1)?

2021-09-12T12:05:00.000+05:30

मुझे तुमसे हैं कितने गिले

तुम कितने दिन बाद मिले

बोलो इतने दिन क्या किया ?

क्या किया ?

क्या किया?

Life isn't Ram Lakhan or any other Subhash Ghai movie either. So the expectation of anyone popping out of a photograph and singing the remainder of this jolly song is not going to lead anywhere. Instead we have been lead to (or more accurately - leading each other to) is to some n-th wave of this pandemic and political unrest across the world.

9 months have flown by and the virus is still making rounds. Privileged people have setup home offices. They now complain about the quality of OTT content and the cringe vlogs on YouTube. Outside the bubble, there were setbacks and worse things happened. People lost their family and friends. But the human life has moved on. Maybe that is Humanity.

On a personal front, some travel has happened this year and we are thankful to the Almighty for that. Here's the first batch of photographs from 2021, almost when it is about to end in three months. I have some hope to post more often, but probably that hope needs to be saved for better things - I guess.

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Play >>

2020-12-31T15:23:00.001+05:30

Well, the world hasn't changed one bit since I paused. But the calendars are going to switch tonight. And its about time to un-pause the blog and move on.

The next few months will decide if the new year is 2021 or 2020(1).

Pause;

2020-07-05T20:59:00.001+05:30

There have not been any posts in the last two weeks. Too many things keep the calendar and the mind occupied.

I think I will take a pause.

And I hope that when I am back, the world is a happier place than it is today.

Cross-post from Instagram #18 | Flashbacks #15

2020-06-14T17:41:00.002+05:30

I missed a post.

Did you notice?

I guess not.

But that does not matter.

I am keeping these for the age when I might start forgetting things.

And reading these posts will make me remember the life I had.

In those days, I will live only in the present and the past.

Because future will not matter,

As it will take care of itself.

Here are the pictures from the week before. Last week was very busy. I even missed some 1SE days too. I will start afresh from Monday.

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Always famished. March 2016. . . . . . . #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #cat #catsofinstagram #catstagram #turkey #turkey🇹🇷 #goreme #kapadokya #cappadocia #turkeytravel

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 1, 2020 at 9:00am PDT

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Beacon. December 2010. . . . . . #goatrip #goa #goadiaries #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #beach #beachview

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 2, 2020 at 9:39am PDT

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चलो । September 2012. . . . . .#indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #munnar #munnardiaries #kerala #keralagram #kerala360 #keralatourism #keralaattraction #kerala_360

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 3, 2020 at 8:33am PDT

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Haunt. December 2018. . . . . #moon #moonphotography #nightphotography #moonshot #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #luxor #luxoregypt #egypt

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 5, 2020 at 10:41am PDT

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Will you share? June 2012. . . . . #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #singapore #singaporezoo #monkeys #monkey #zoo

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 6, 2020 at 9:26am PDT

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Sights from the train window. March 2008. . . . . . #journey #ontheway #train #railway #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #tamilnadu #sonyericsson #blackandwhitephotography

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 7, 2020 at 2:50am PDT

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About last year. June 2019. . . . . #bhutan #bhutantravel #paro #bhutan🇧🇹 #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #parobhutan #landscape #landscape_captures #landscapephotography

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on Jun 8, 2020 at 8:22am PDT

Cross-post from Instagram #17 | Flashbacks #14

2020-06-04T07:20:00.001+05:30

Hello to June.We are almost there to reach midway of 2020. New stuff keeps popping up to keep the world on its toes.

And we are the only species on this earth to realize this.

And then talk about it.

Or blog about it.

Or make Instagram/WhatsApp/Facebook stories about it.

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Looking back. November 2018. . . . . . #teanau #fjord #newzealand #newzealandvacations #newzealandtrip #newzealandnatural #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #mountains #nature #landscape #roadtrip #mountainview #naturelovers #naturephotography #landscape_captures #rearview #rearviewmirror

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 25, 2020 at 8:15am PDT

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January 2013. . . . . . #bangalore #lalbagh #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 26, 2020 at 6:41pm PDT

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Greens. August 2015. . . . . . #ooty #coonoor #hills #tamilnadu #tamilnadutourism #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 27, 2020 at 8:50am PDT

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Moment. May 2012. . . . . . . #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #coorg #coorgdiaries #kodagu #karnatakatourism #karnataka

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 28, 2020 at 9:15am PDT

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गुज़रा हुआ ज़माना, आता नहीं दुबारा, हाफ़िज़ खुदा तुम्हारा... 15 years back. . . . . . #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #vallabhvidhyanagar #vallabhvidyanagar #anand #gujarat #hostellife

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 29, 2020 at 8:57am PDT

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Eternal. July 2016. . . . . . #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #aurangabad #aurangabad_diaries #aurangabad_clicks

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 30, 2020 at 9:45am PDT

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राणा टिग्रिना प्रताप | February 2010. . . . . . . #indiatravel #indiatravelgram #indiagram #india_clicks #india #indiapictures #indiaphotography #incredibleindia #indiaclicks #igersofindia #333daysofflashbacks #throwback #flashback #oldphotos #traveldiaries #travelphotography #travels #travel #triplingtoast #frog #frogs #frogsofinstagram #nature #naturephotography

A post shared by Vivek Pandey (@pandeyvivek) on May 31, 2020 at 12:24am PDT