Mormon Mommy Writers

I’m Having a Little Too Much Fun

2013-05-20T05:30:00.000-06:00

I realized after I wrote this post that I had planned on a “happiness clicker project” follow-up today. Well, I couldn’t find my clicker. So I didn’t do it. But what I have been doing is pretending I have a clicker and consciously trying to think happier thoughts. Works great when I remember to do it! ;-) I’ll get back with y’all about the clicking next week. If you missed that post, check it out here.

So, I’ve mentioned before about some of my *other* writing gigs. Today I thought I’d share one with you.

A few months back I attended a birthday party for a friend over at a consignment store near my house. When I heard they were having a party at a consignment store, I thought it was a little bit odd, but I was curious. Well, when I arrived I was pleasantly surprised- okay, more like stunned. It was the prettiest consignment store I had ever seen.

I ended up talking with the owner for awhile and I learned that she had opened the year before, but she was struggling to get the word out (it’s literally about 8 minutes from my house and I never knew it was there- and I’m a total clothes horse/bargain hunter). I told her I would love to help her out, so we ended up meeting and talking marketing and, long story short, I now do a blog for her.

We’re still working on getting followers (planning a big giveaway for that next week) but I’m really proud of what I’ve put together for her. You can check it out here- The Sophisticated Suitcase. I do a seasonal blog plan, then I go into the store about once a month to take photos for the posts I have planned, then I do one post a week and link it up to the store's facebook page.

I love going into the store and setting up my shots and dressing up the mannequins and finding outfits that go together- it’s just a total blast. Then I get to come home and edit the photos and do the other thing I love- write about them! And while I don’t get paid much (she’s struggling so I’m on the low end of the pay scale until *hopefully* we can get her going) I am having a blast doing it, and I know it will be great experience and possibly a stepping stone to other similar opportunities.

Am I the only one marketing my skills or has anyone else out there ventured into advertising? Just curious... ;-)

A Path to Anywhere

2013-05-19T12:52:00.000-06:00

A couple of week ago I wrote a post about how I like to create stories in my head as I pass by different places and scenery. A few days ago I was at the park with my kids and I saw a path. In reality I know right where the path leads, but as I stared at this somewhat hidden trail I felt like it had a story to tell. I took a picture of it on my phone and texted it to Ashley. I asked her what sort of story the picture created for her, or where the path might lead. We went back and forth for a while bouncing ideas and just trying to stir our creative juices. Here's what we came up with:

It could be a good place for a scary story

Something like "Bridge to Terabithia" or some magic land.

Could even be a good book cover

A secret garden, some forgotten nook, discovered all overgrown.

It could lead to an old family cemetery...

or an old Indian burial ground

It could be the start of a historical mystery/adventure

What story does this picture tell you? What does it make you think of? We would love to hear your ideas and thoughts.

Saturday So What: Inspired Eavesdropping

2013-05-18T07:00:00.000-06:00

So normally, I am not an eavesdropper. Just ask anyone. I am the daintiest, most well mannered southern belle you have ever met. (hey, I hear you snorting over there!)

But this past weekend at Storymakers, I made the rare exception and listened in to Howard Taylor, author of the awesome comic Schlock Mercenary and more, talk to an aspiring author about productivity. And more interestingly for me, inspiration. He likened the voice of inspiration to that of the Holy Ghost. The more you listen and act, the more it speaks to you.

BOOM CRASH Mind blown.

I have always thought of creativity just like any other muscle, you might be a creative person, but you have to exercise that aspect regularly for it to grow. It is an ingrained part of me, so when writer's block strikes, I feel like an amputee. But thinking on Howard's terms, I just kept expounding and expanding on the principle of the spirit.

Sometimes, when I am busy with life, I just cannot receive revelation. Aside from my daily nonsense, I am doing all the right things: go to church, temple, whatever; but I am stressed like crazy, and of course that is when I need the spirit the most. Same things apply to writing. When a deadline looms, sometimes I cannot think of single non cliched thing to type out. Nothing new and certainly nothing that retains my narrative voice. That is when I need it the most and though I am trying so hard and working at it, the muse will not come.

My answer was to just try harder. But I think I will try a new approach, the one the gospel teaches. Clear my mind and let the cares of the world slip away. Listen to the still small voice and act on every prompting. We all know what that means in the spiritual sense, but in a writing sense that means jotting down every idea. Even if you can't use it in your current manuscript. Even if it's about vampires and completely unsellable at this point. Write it down and file it away, but get it out.

So often when either the Holy Ghost or inspiration speaks, I am to busy... being busy. I recognize the thought as a good idea and file it in my brain. Then I promptly forget it because of all the other crap I am cramming in. How many times have I not taken a card to a sick neighbor? How many bestsellers have I let rot away in the cobwebbed recesses of my mind?

But no more! From this day forth I will keep my little notebook and write down ideas, even the ones with sparkly abs. I will listen and really actively hear.

I will even eavesdrop more often, because who knows what other little nuggets of wisdom I am missing out on.

April Showers...and I'm Not Talking Flowers

2013-05-17T06:30:00.000-06:00

I'm so glad April is over. It was a crazy month. So frantic that I forgot to write a post here for May 3rd. Well, I actually wrote it, but forgot to post it.

I participated in the A-Z blogging challenge during April, which involved writing a post a day, starting with the letter A on April 1 and ending with the letter Z on April 30. The A-Z challenge is a frenzied, intense brain workout.

Two weeks in, my dad had some stroke symptoms and was hospitalized. He did not have a stroke, but it was discovered he did have a brain bleed and would need brain surgery . B is for brain surgery. Oh. My. Word.

Dad, who would be 90 on May 8, came through the surgery very well. Three days later, he had a slump, and we thought he'd had a stroke. S is for stroke. Holy Moly.

However....he rallied with no intervention and began rehab. R is for rehab.

After only twenty-four hours in rehab, he had more stroke symptoms.

Back to the hospital. H is for hospital.

Then, he developed a bladder problem and contracted MRSA. M is for Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus. I see why they call it MRSA.

He is a trooper, my dad - part of that greatest generation - and he stabilized enough to send him back to rehab May 3 (my forgetful posting day. F is for forgetful.) Hopefully, he will keep moving forward.

We had a big birthday party for him on the 8th.

We had his favorite foods - honey-baked ham and cherry cobbler. C is for cherry cobbler. I'm stuck on this letter thing, as you can see.

I hope May brings less attention to the alphabet and no hospital visits. I pray May brings strawberries and cool breezes and better days for Dad. D is for Dad.

I've got to get off this train.

Are You A Serial Killer?

2013-05-16T17:11:00.004-06:00

Here's a light-hearted post for you today:

My sister-in-law and I have attended the LDStorymakers Conference in Utah several times together. This year, though I was unable to go, she brought along her daughter, my 15-year-old niece. She related this story to me, and I enjoyed it so much, I had to share it. (The details may be not be wholly accurate - it is a retelling after all!)

Apparently they were sitting together at a table in the main ballroom, listening to a panel of speakers. One of them made reference to the Dan Wells book, "I Am Not A Serial Killer." My sweet niece leaned over to her mother and asked,

"Mom, what's a serial killer?"

My sister-in-law thought about the question briefly before responding,

"It's somebody who murders person after person."

My niece nodded, and looked thoughtfully around the room before saying,

"I guess that means we're sitting in a room full of serial killers."

I had to laugh, because in a twisted sort of way, when you're surrounded by other writers, it's true! I've even read quotes from authors such as J.K. Rowling where she laments about how difficult it can be to kill off a favorite character from a storyline. It also reminded me of the movie, "Stranger than Fiction". I'm not usually a huge Will Ferrell fan, but he won me over in that show. If you haven't watched it, go check it out. Pure genius.

Have a great Thursday!

For the Win!

2013-05-15T03:43:00.001-06:00

This blog post (and I really insist you read it because it's amazingly fabulous) has been going viral for the last few weeks, and quite rightly so. It reminds us all that we should stop beating ourselves up about the things we fail at, and instead congratulate ourselves for those little "drops of awesome" we add to our bucket every day. It's uplifting, inspiring and most of all, true. I read it about a month ago and it really has changed my outlook on my life for the better. Thank you so much, Kathryn Thompson. (Why does everything great seem to come from Seattle?)

Then we had the wonderful post from Kasey on Monday about clicking to count our positive thoughts, and how it can really improve our outlook on life. Amen to that, and if I owned a clicker I'd be clicking away. (Seriously, is there anything Hillary Weeks can't do? Is it fair for someone to be that talented at singing, and that pretty and slim, and funny and clever too? She must be from Seattle.)

I've had on my mind, however, something I feel I need to add to all this feel-good stuff. (I've just rebranded my author self: I am now "Your friend for feel-good fiction". So I'm all about the feel-good factor. And the alliteration.)

Three years ago my eldest daughter lost her iPod shuffle. Those things are tiny! A few weeks ago we found it. We were selling our old car, and discovered the little silver iPod tucked into a rusting cranny in the footwell as we cleaned it out.

Naturally the poor neglected thing didn't work. I plugged it in and tried to charge it up, but it wouldn't take a charge and my computer couldn't connect to it. Since eldest child had long ago bought a new one, it wasn't an issue. Pity, though. I'd have quite liked a little iPod shuffle so that I could listen to music as I pottered about doing housework.

About a week later, however, I noticed an orange light on the iPod. Lazy creature that I am, I'd left it plugged into its charger rather than throwing it out. A bit of poking buttons and fiddling, and it sprang to life. My computer managed to discover it, and I loaded it with my music and now use it every day.

Here's my thought: If I had planned to leave it to dry out (or whatever) and by my own clever technological know-how resurrected a dead iPod, then that would be a drop of awesome. That would be me being great and adding to my bucket of awesomeness. But it wasn't anything to do with me. It was something great that just happened.

For the win!

I noticed, right from the next day, that actually many great but little things happen without any input from us. Parking spaces are free, favourite songs come on the radio, or we manage to find the end of the sellotape right away. I'm not talking about the things which we could call blessings–things that we have maybe prayed for, or hoped for, or worked for–just the little, everyday serendipitous occurrences.

I sat down and idly switched on the TV the other day to find a new series of one of my favourite TV shows just starting. I had no idea it was coming back, and could so easily have missed it. For the win!

Although my boss turned down my request for a new laptop computer to use for work, she did give me her old one (and bought herself a new one) and it's almost brand new and in perfect condition and exactly what I would have chosen. For the win! (Meanwhile, my boss is struggling to get to grips with Windows 8.)

A stranger had bought a set of hair elastics in Morrison's last week. It came with a free hairband which she didn't want, so she gave it to my daughter who loves it and has worn it every day since. For the win!

The fact is that not only do we do great things (drops of awesome) every day, but great things happen to us, seemingly completely at random. So while we're adding drops of awesome to our bucket, and clicking for each positive thought, perhaps we should also take a moment to notice the really wonderful things that just come our way.

Every time your size is in stock, or the sun comes out just as you're setting off for a walk, or you bump into an old friend, think, For the Win! And see just how great your life is.

Talking Tuesday: Writer's Block: Is Its All in your Head?

2013-05-14T18:31:00.002-06:00

I happily stumble upon a group of authors doing podcast, Author's Think Tank, this week. Today I listened to Episode 11 The Myth of Writer's Block. Shirley Bahlmann, one of their guest authors, very confidently says there is no such thing as writers block. After which she tells us how to get through those hard moments when you are trying to find the direction your story needs to go. But much like Kasey's post, it can all come down to positive thinking. When you say you have writer's block you are focusing on the negative. If you instead approach the moments has an opportunity to choose which direction is best for your story it becomes a much more positive experience.

If we give our thoughts over to negative mantras, "I will never get through this...." or "I cannot accomplish....", then we are setting ourselves up to fail. I often run into this same problem when I approach running. I get to a point where my mental focus is on my exhaustion, pain, and boredom. When I allow this to fill my mind, it is almost impossible for me to run any further. The negative thoughts weigh on me as if they were an hundred pound pack. When I tell myself that I can continue and I focus on a goal, then my determination carries me.

Our minds are powerful. Where we choose to set our focus will determine where we end up. Use your power for good.

Click It! Click It Good!

2013-05-13T05:30:00.000-06:00

Okay, the title of this post is completely awful. But it’s late and I’m tired. And when I wrote this title it made me laugh, so it stays.

Anyway, I came across this video clip today and I was really intrigued by this idea. I happen to have a clicker (when I was running long distances on the track I found myself getting lost in my thoughts and having a hard time remembering how many laps I’d done, so I got a clicker so I wouldn’t have to think about it) and I think I’m going to try this.

Anybody else in? Shall we try our experiment for one week and report back next Monday?

:-)

-Kasey

To All Mothers

2013-05-12T12:57:00.000-06:00

Thank you to every mother, to every woman who's cared for another, and all those with a nurturing heart.

I hope you all are able to find the opportunity to thank the women in your life that have loved and nurtured you.

I Often Go Walking

Most of all take time to thank our Heavenly Father for the wonderful blessing of having mothers in our lives.

Saturday So What: Lending a helping quill

2013-05-11T07:00:00.000-06:00

I'm writing this Friday night, because tomorrow I will be at Storymakers once again, running back and forth through the Marriot lobby, bringing Anne Perry scones (it was really a roll, but I'm sticking to the British thing), trying to joke with nervous authors while they wait for their turn to pitch, and probably at some point trying to remember someone's name who's face I know from Facebook.

But today, aside from sore feet, I gained something new. A knowledge that people actually know who I am. Huh, go freaking figure. Sometimes, it feels like we write words and then toss them into the void, never to be seen or heard from again. I was so humbled and warm and fuzzy feelinged with all the people who came up to me today who said they'd read my book, seen me on the Today show, - and even, yes, regularly read my posts here on MMW. Jeanna Stay- learn that name now folks, cuz you will be seeing it again someday - found me at the mass author signing to say hello and meet the snark in person since she reads my column weekly. I had a lot of fun chatting with her about fractured fairytales, how to get sneak into a trend, and more. And I promised I would include her in tonite's post. Mission accomplished!

Also learned today, were somethings I already knew. Like, Tristi Pinkston is a freaking hilarious MC. Or that agents and editors are really people and don't walk around with pitchforks, torturing poor authors for fun while on break. Having the villain secretly be the Main characters's dad is way overdone. Cheetos will always top Lays. Heels are not smart all day running wear. Annette Lyon is truly the Queen of the Grammar Nazis. And we Mormons have some of the best most creative minds on the planet. And when we come together it makes a super supportive community that lifts each other up and celebrates our success.

My advice to anyone who is reading this today, find your writing community. Whether online, in your hometown... whatever. But find some peeps outside your mom and granny who can faux swear along with you when the rejections come, tell you when your character is whiny, and remind you that you are an awesome success with a story only you can tell.

Self esteem and mental health issues are pretty much a mandatory requirement for an author. And the publishing field is littered with land mines that can blow even the best of us to pieces. I am here to pick them up with you. The other MMW's are here. Share your heartaches and your successes. Ask questions or share your wisdom. That's why we're all here isn't it?

If you have something you want to say, ask, names you want to call me or news you want to share - please email me at betsyschow@gmail.com and I will see what I can do to lending a helping quill.

Love y'all

Betsy

Remember Who You Are

2013-05-10T10:24:00.000-06:00

This week, my very wonderful mother in law passed away after a five year battle with cancer. In the days following up to her death, the family all gathered and took turns at her bedside. Afterwards we compared notes on the what she told each person. Everyone who she spoke to was told these same words, "Remember who you are. You are a child of God. Stay strong." Knowing that her life was at an end this was the wisdom she felt most important to impart to her children and grandchildren. Because knowing who you are reminds you of where you are going. Having this knowledge through out your life brings so much peace.
It's just as important to remember who you are when you are writing. It's so easy to get caught up in what is selling, or what publishers want, or what the world thinks is socially acceptable that we forget who we are. Sometimes we tell ourselves that our characters are not us therefore we can tell the story from their perspective and be socially acceptable. I'm not talking about writing books that have no darkness. Because you can't show the true power of light without darkness. But if we show immoral things as good, then we are not being true to who we are. I'm not sure if this is making sense right now. My mind is still in a fog. But I want to boldly proclaim liked mother in law did, "Remember who you are!" Don't give in to the voices around you to compromise your standards. Stay strong in your beliefs and always show that you are a child of God!

Leading By Example

2013-05-09T21:16:00.001-06:00

This morning I watched my two year old son climb up on a chair and make his own (from a packet) oatmeal breakfast (with assistance from me at the tap). He measured the water, dumped it in the bowl with the pre-measured oats, instructed me in which manner to carry across the room, and then pushed the correct buttons on the microwave to cook the yummy meal. After a scoop of sugar and a helping of milk (which he uncapped and added himself), he was happily eating, and I was sitting there in awe.

On one hand I was thinking, how is it that my toddler can almost independently complete a task that my two school aged children only mastered within the last year? On the other hand I was worrying about how to keep him from experimenting with his newfound abilities to operate the microwave when I'm not in the kitchen with him?

I tried to reflect on my older children. They certainly did not express an interest in cooking their own breakfast at the age of two, and I probably never would have even assumed they had the ability. Is there something different about this child? Is he smarter, more determined, or more observant?

It's impossible to say with certainty, but the more I think about it, I believe it really has to do with leading by example. You see, my toddler gets to interact with two older, independent children who treat him like an equal, and in his mind, age difference is not a concrete idea. He likely sees himself as their peer. If they can make their own oatmeal, so can he. He's watched them do it, and he knows how. The age and authority gap that exists between a parent and child is much different between supportive siblings. My older children likely could have completed the same task at a similar age, had they had the tutelage of a similar kind.

Which got to me thinking about writing: Its a good thing we all work at this skill from different levels. We have varying amounts of experience and education when it comes to being writers, but the key is to be interacting. While there are giants and professionals in the writing world whose advice and instruction can be of great benefit to our growth and progress (similar to our parents), what we really need are peers. We need other writers, no matter their stage or experience, to share and learn and grow and interact with. We need siblings. Siblings with which it is difficult sometimes to differentiate an 'age difference', though it certainly will exist. Then we won't know when we're completing a task that should be too difficult for our abilities - because we watched our peers do it successfully. Once we know we can do something impossible, we can focus on doing it more independently, and with more confidence.

So get out there. Make some writers friends. Make some contacts. Find some peers. And if you have something great, nurture it.

In the end, what we really need is each other.

Why British Mormons will never Marry in the Temple

2013-05-08T09:05:00.002-06:00

The new Mr and Mrs Buttimore leaving
Southend Ward LDS Chapel

My wedding day was wonderful. At 11 a.m. I walked down the aisle on my father's arm, followed by five bridesmaids, to where my husband-to-be was waiting with his best man. We recited traditional vows, exchanged rings, walked back down the aisle together, and then had a wonderful reception celebration with 80 guests. For most of our family members and many of our friends and colleagues it was the first time they had set foot in an LDS church.

After the reception we drove to the London England LDS Temple where we were sealed for time and for all eternity in the presence of 20 friends, most of them members of our ward.

It was a wonderful day, and I particularly love the fact that we had the best of both worlds. We had the dream traditional wedding in our LDS chapel surrounded by those we love, and we also had the meaningful and sacred sealing ordinance. I wouldn't change a thing.

Members of the church in the US have faced a particular problem for many years. Unlike in the UK, marriages which take place in an LDS temple are legally recognised, so US couples are encouraged to marry in this sacred place. (For non-Mormons reading this, Temples are different from the chapels used for weekly Sunday worship. They are reserved for particular ordinances - including the sealing of marriages for eternity - and are, in fact, closed on Sundays.) However, only worthy recommend-holding members of the LDS church are permitted to enter a Temple. This means that a couple whose parents are not members of the church (as is the case for my husband and I) cannot be at their wedding. Engaged couples therefore face the agonising choice between having their wedding elsewhere so that their family can be present and then waiting the year the church requires before entering the Temple for the sealing ordinance, or explaining to their families and friends why they will not be able to witness their marriage.

Waiting to go into the London Temple for our Sealing

The law on marriages in the UK has relaxed recently. It used to be the law that marriages could only be conducted in Anglican churches, other churches where a licensed registrar was present, or council registry offices. In the last few years, however, this law has been changed and now owners of stately homes, hotels, etc., can apply for a licence to conduct weddings. There's even an old windmill nearby which hosts weddings, although not receptions because it can only hold 20 people.

Could the London and Preston Temples now apply to be licensed for weddings? Could British Latter-day Saints now legally marry in the Temple?

I think if there was the suggestion that the Church might apply for such a licence most Latter-day Saints in the UK would be against it. We love being able to invite our non-member friends and family to our weddings. Whenever prophets and apostles encourage us only to marry in the Temple, we are quite aware that their counsel does not apply to us. We cannot marry in the Temple, we can only have our marriage sealed there - albeit whenever we like, including on the day of the legal ceremony.

It's not going to be an issue, however, because of another law about marriage. Weddings in the UK have to be open to the public because it has to be possible for anyone with a legal impediment to the marriage to be able to come into the ceremony and declare it. The Temple is not a public building therefore, unless UK law changes further (which seems very unlikely), it will never be legal here to marry in the Temple.

And whilst we're on the subject of laws about marriage in the UK, weddings also have to take place after 8am and before 6pm. Evening weddings are not legal because before electric light was invented the law had to ensure that the parties could see each other and were thus marrying the right person. Neither it is legal (or sensible, given the weather) to get married out-of-doors. Weddings have to take place within a licensed building which is also a permanent structure - although some venues have built pretty pavillions or gazebos in their gardens to get round this rule. Quick weddings can't happen either. It takes at least three weeks to call banns for a wedding, and an appointment needs to be made for a special licence, with both parties being interviewed, so that can take several weeks to arrange too.

What do you think? Was your Temple marriage perfect in every way, or would you have preferred to walk down the aisle in your chapel too?

Unlocking Your Dreams

2013-05-06T05:30:00.000-06:00

I took this photo last month at the Botanical Gardens in Washington, D.C. Love.

When I was in high school I read a book about dream interpretation. I’ve always had very vivid dreams (to the point that my brother has been convinced that I’m dreaming other people’s memories- how’s that for a good novel premise?), and it’s always seemed to me that for my brain to be working so hard while I’m sleeping, it must be trying to tell me something. After reading the book, I started interpreting my dreams and while I don’t do it all the time, whenever I do I am always a little bit amazed by what I discover.

First, let me give you a little crash course in dream interpretation. You know all that stuff you’ve read about how certain things in your dreams are representative of other things, like everybody’s dreams are in secret code? Well, that’s true, but what you might not know is that the code is different for everybody. Just because you dream about A doesn’t mean it always is symbolic of B.

The best way to interpret your dreams is to look at the people, places, and events taking place in them. Then ask yourself, “How do I feel about this particular person, place, or event?”

I had a dream recently that felt strong enough that I decided it needed interpretation. In my dream I was visiting New York City with my family. It was the anniversary of September 11th. In my dream they had rebuilt the World Trade Center and we were in a part of the city where we had a good view of the towers. We were standing there and I heard a commotion. I looked, and everyone was looking up into the sky where a plane was headed straight for the building. I had a horrible sinking feeling in my gut, and I just knew I had to get my family out of there. I was holding both of my youngest girls- the baby, 9 months old, and my 3-year-old. In my dream I was very glad that I was holding both of them, because I knew where they were and by me carrying them I could get them to safety more quickly. We made it safely to our transportation and then I woke up.

So what did it mean? The fact that I was carrying both my little girls stuck out to me. To be truthful, when I’m carrying the baby and I end up having to carry the 3-year-old too for whatever reason, I get a little bit martyr-y. Like, “poor me, exhausted mom never gets a rest.” Dumb, right? But in this dream I was glad I was carrying them, because I could keep them safe. Because I was stronger than they were and they needed me.

As I analyzed it, I realized that I’ve been doing the “poor me” thing a lot lately. I think this dream was the Lord reminding me that the world is a scary place, that evil abounds, and this work that I do day in and day out, exhausting and frustrating and maddening as it may be, it’s essential. It’s about more than just dirty diapers and homework and temper tantrums; by doing what I’m doing- this tiring, seemingly never ending work- I am holding my children close and carrying them to safety.

Ever since that dream I’ve tried to avoid “martyr mode”. I’ve tried to remember how unbelievably blessed I am. Whenever something challenging comes up, I try to think of how much worse it could be. My baby got diagnosed with “early pneumonia” this week. Rather than mope about the doctor’s visits, medications, and breathing treatments, I was just grateful I had them. Heaven only knows how many mothers have heard their babies start wheezing and coughing and known they would probably be losing them, because there was absolutely nothing they could do.

So this week, take some time and pay attention to your dreams. God might be using them to tell you something important that could change your life. If you’re not sure how to go about interpreting them, I’ve had some success helping others interpret their dreams using a “dream interview” and I’d be glad to help you out. Just let me know. :-)

Setting the Scene

2013-05-05T12:49:00.000-06:00

I love where I live, and this Spring I have fallen even more in love with it. I am surrounded by a variety of settings. I can see everything from a bustling city to a quite small town community. There are rocky river beaches and sandy shorelines along the ocean. Every day I pass both developed neighborhoods and old farms and farm houses. And to top it all off I'm surrounded by countless historical sites. Having this huge variety is amazing as a writer. Any time I go anywhere I can't help but create stories in my head to match the area I'm in. I find myself asking what types of characters would live in whatever place I may be at the time. I wonder at what sorts of exciting things could take place.
Lately I have been trying to focus on the little details that can pull a reader into the story, a lot of times that includes the character's surroundings. As I drive across a bridge and see the waves splashing onto the rocky edges of the river I try and picture myself sitting there and think of all the things I would see, feel, and hear. When I drive by the edge of a forest I think of what a person might experience while in those trees. Would they be running from someone or something? Could they be on a leisurely walk? Or perhaps they are exploring and seeking some lost treasure. I feel like this has opened up my mind's eye to a whole new level of writing. Now I feel like whenever I go anywhere I have a new story pop into my head. It sort of makes every outing a bit of an adventure.

Saturday So What: How to make your writing conference Pitch perfect

2013-05-04T07:00:00.000-06:00

How many of us are going to LDStorymakers this year? If you just wiggled in your chair and raised your hand eagerly, welcome my pretties.

Next weekend is, in my opinion, the premier Writing Conference in Utah. So many extremely busy and talented authors, agents, and editors abound for you to rub shoulders with and, wait for it, pitch your story to.

Did your heart just sink to your stomach along with yesterday's meatloaf? Well, you are not alone. Whether you have paid for a pitch session or you are just attending the workshops, you will have to talk to people about your project. No, you can not just hand out query letters and run away. No conference doorbell ditching allowed. You must actually be able to convey via the spoken word what your awesomeness is all about. It's not fair, you say? After all, we became writers in the first place to avoid talking to people. Well, them's the breaks kid. You've got one week to get over it, so let's start now.

First things usually go at the beginning. Like you name. And what kind of books you write. Try to come up with the answer now as opposed to bumbling on the spot trying to explain your unique blend of sci-fi historical fantasy set in Nephi's time. If you write every genre under the sun, pick the one you want to talk about. Or try this approach:
Hi, my name is Betsy Schow. I've published narrative non-fiction, but currently I'm working on a new speculative YA.

Next, have your fast ball pitch practiced and prepared AHEAD of time. "It's Dawn of the Dead meets Carebears" (not really, but that got you interested didn't it?) Pick two things that combined sum up your project and make it unique.

Now, if the person is still standing there, give them a brief peep. This is not a 2-3 page synopsis. This is a 2-3 sentence hook to peak someone's interest. They do not need to know that it was really Aunt Sally in the hall with the wrench.

Whether you are in an official pitch session or not, this is probably the point the agent, editor or other author will have questions for you. They may also just request the full or first 50 pages right there. Some things to be prepared to answer ahead of time:
* Who is you target audience
* What other books are you competing against
* How can you help market this book. What is your CURRENT (not what you will do) reach to the masses
* Why is your book different and better than everybody else's (and the answer is NOT, my mom said so or it would make a great movie)

In talking to my agent, Michelle Witte (who is going to be there at the conference by the way), I have picked up a few no-no's

DON'T go on about how nervous you are, how you've never done this before. If you aren't confident in your ability, it is hard to get someone to take a chance on you.

DON'T tell the entire plot of the book including character backstory. This is a tease. You want to leave the agent wanting more, dying to know what you are talking about so they will request those pages.

DON'T try to make a new best friend. It's great to be nice and amicable, but more importantly, it's better to be professional. Take criticism or rejection well, no swearing please. On the other hand, if they request the pages, don't jump on down or look flabbergasted and say "Really?"

DON'T accost an editor or agent while they are eating, in the elevator (even for elevator pitches) or in mid conversation. Remember to start at the beginning with the hellos before you try to introduce them to your brilliance.

My advice, take this week and practice talking about your book to random strangers at Costco. Just kidding, but really, get comfortable talking about it. Then, when a perfect opportunity to pitch comes up, you won't freeze. You can deliver the goods like a pro.

Good luck, have fun, take notes, and make an impression. Hopefully a great one. See y'all there. Insert shameless plug to buy my book, Finished being Fat, at the conference bookstore for cheap and have it signed by me at the mass author signing.

Book Review: Fairy Godmothers Inc. by Jenniffer Wardell

2013-05-01T08:57:00.001-06:00

I took this book with my on my recent sojourn to Florida (www.annahitsamerica.blogspot.com) and so it will always give me glowy feelings because I associate it with reading on the balcony overlooking a lake across which I could see the Disney fireworks. Life doesn't get much better that a book, a balcony, a burrito and unaccustomed heat. (I miss those three last things.)

But the pertinent question here is was the book any good? Did I enjoy reading it because I was on a balcony in Florida, or did I enjoy reading it because it was a great book?

Well, both. The writer is capable and the prose flowed well, it was perfectly edited (I didn't find any mistakes anyway) and while maybe not laugh-out-loud funny it was certainly very amusing and entertaining. What's not to love about the line, "He is currently enjoying life as a pig"? The characters weren't quite fully realised, with the exception of the heroine, Kate, but it was nicely unpredictable maybe because of that. For example, I never really figured out Rellie well enough to know whether or not she was happy to marry Rupert. Still, it was quirky and fun, and the mix of modern and fantastical was perfectly executed.

And yet... somehow it didn't grip me. I finished it, but had I not been happily ensconced on my balcony, with none of the demands of my hectic day-to-day life, I might not have done. And if I hadn't I wouldn't have spent any time wondering what happened in the end. I had time for reading, so I read it. In the chaos of home life as a working mother, writer and seminary teacher I might not have gone to the effort of finding the time. (Whereas with the most recent book I read, Wool, I all but took a day off work in order to read it.)

Still an entertaining and amusing read, though.

Talking Tuesday: Climbing out of the Pit of Procrastination

2013-04-30T14:12:00.002-06:00

Little Man conquering the brick stairs

Case Study:
On the same day, three male students enroll in the same online course. All course work must be submitted within 12 weeks. This is the only hard deadline.

The first student, Mr. E. Z. Breezy, throws his curriculum packets into the back seat of his car with all the mail he has been meaning to get to. The packet will remain here until the middle of week 11, at which time, Mr. Breezy will attempt to complete the entire course before the 12 week deadline.

When the second student, Mr. Wer Co Holic receives his curriculum packet, he returns to his apartment and begins immediately working on the course. By ignoring the needs of others around him and all other priorities, Wer is able to complete the 12 week course in the first 4 weeks. However, he has lost his part-time job, and his girl friend is now dating E.Z.

The third student, Mr. Cal I Brated, also gets his curriculum packet. After he returns home from his full-time job, he kisses his wife and kids. When the kids are fed, cleaned, and resting, Cal sits down at his desk with his planner and his curriculum packet. He sets reasonable (soft) deadlines for himself, to prevent the work from becoming too overwhelming. No priorities are ignored, loved ones are properly loved, and the course is completed at the end of the 12 weeks.

All three men approached the course in a different way. Some of you may identify yourself in one of these approaches. Regardless of how you approach life, you certainly should be aware that a key skill in productivity is not procrastinating. Deadlines can be motivating, especially when it leads to bad consequences when not met. For those who write without deadlines, it can be hard to remain motivated.

I stumbled upon a useful article How to Motivate Yourself Without Hard Deadlines by Scott Young. Mr. Young lays out a path to set and meet "soft" deadlines. These are deadlines that do not hold heavy consequences. He explains the the 3 keys to being the master of your to-do list are

Set Reasonable Expectations : No too easy and too hard to meet within the time frame.
Cycling Hard and Easy Days: After hard full days, reward yourself with a slower easy day
Schedule Calibration: Train yourself to finish your to-do list no more no less.

If you can learn to follow these guidelines, you can become more productive while saving yourself much anxiety. When it is time for breaks you can relax without guilt.

Writer for Hire

2013-04-29T06:00:00.000-06:00

So last week I mentioned this new “writing gig” I’ve been doing. It’s not glamorous, it’s only marginally fun, the pay isn’t great, and I get no publishing credit for my work. So why am I doing it? Well, a couple of reasons:

1. It makes me write. The more you write, the better you get, right? And while it’s not the fun fantasy, children’s stories, or poetry that I love to do, it makes me sit down for at least a few minutes every day and hone my craft.

2. It pays. Well, it does. Nice to be able to contribute to the family income and put away a little bit for my future adventures.

3. It’s flexible. I choose each week how many articles I will commit to complete that week, so I can work as much or as little as I want, as long as I don’t bite off more than I can chew.

4. I’m learning. Not only do I get to research topics I never would have studied before, the people I’m working for have a super strict style guide. I have to make sure that each article conforms exactly to their specifications or else they’ll reject it. It’s causing me to look much more closely at the way I write!

So there you have it. I guess I’m a professional writer!

By the way, I found this job through Elance. Elance is a great place for freelance writers to find work. Maybe I’ll write about that next week... ;-)

Have you ever hired yourself out for less-than-enjoyable work, writing or otherwise?

Saturday So What:Teaching Self Sufficiency

2013-04-27T07:00:00.000-06:00

Earlier this month I missed one of my posts. It's because I was so swamped that day and the week leading up to it. It was the Utah State Competition for Odyssey of the Mind. I was a coach for one of the teams from the local elementary school. Seven rambunctious 8-9 year old boys with half of them diagnosed with ADHD. I learned a few things in the 6 months leading up to the competition, one of them that I never want septuplets, the second that children in this day and age need to be taught creative and self sufficient skills.

The point of Odyssey is to form teams and give them a problem to solve during the school year. It usually requires them to produce a skit and build a structure or remote vehicle that can accomplish a task within a certain set of rules. Oh, and the kids have to do it by themselves. No outside help at all. Even coaches can't tell the kids how to do something, suggest a solution or glue a single thing. It's all kid powered.

At the start of the year, I was amazed at how little these kids could do on their own. It took them 3-4 times as long to complete a task as it would take me. It was horribly frustrating. I wanted to tell them what to write, how to build their tower, and move on to the next task. But I couldn't without cheating. So I had to work on my patience while the boys figured it out on their own.

This experience made me take a hard look at my parenting style and the other kids at my daughter's school. How many of us have been to a pine wood derby where there's a car that is the biggest and best-- and in no way possible done by a kid? I have known so many parents that "help" make their kids science fair project look better and more impressive. Sure, the backer board might get more attention, but what are they teaching their kids? Take the easy way, do it the "right" way, be the best. If you aren't good enough to be the best, get someone else to help you to be there.

I decided I really don't want my girls raised that way, but it's a challenge. My daughter looks ten times cuter when I dress her. We get out the door faster if I just tie her shoes for her. And the house is so much cleaner if I just put away the toys. But then, if I intervene for the sake of convenience or appearance, my child has learned nothing. But if I let her take the 10 minutes to tie her shoe, she has solved a problem. And there's a sense of pride that comes with it that can't be bought or done for her.

As parents, some times we have a set "right way" in our minds on how something should be done. I know I have a tendency to force my view onto my kids at times. Funny thing though, when I let me kids figure their own way around, they come up with a solution I never would have dreamed of. They can really be amazing. And hopefully, if I teach my kids this creative problem solving and self sufficiency (and patience for myself) then they can grow up knowing that they can do anything, solve any problem, be anyone they want to be.

Thank You Brandon Sanderson!

2013-04-26T03:00:00.000-06:00

Some of you may know by now that my favorite books of all time are "The Wheel of Time" books by Robert Jordan. I started reading these books shortly after I got married almost 20 years ago. I've been a fan of Tolkien since my father gave me "The Hobbit" when I was 10 years old. So when I began to read "The Wheel of Time" books I instantly noticed that Jordan was able to create vivid worlds that transport the reader, much like Tolkien. The details and vibrant words instantly drew me in and I was hooked. The story is of three young men who grew up in a small village only to have their quiet life disturbed because people believed that one of them could be the hero prophesied to come forward and save the world. From this moment on, the struggle between good and evil ensues taking the reader into this world, exploring every culture and creature within it. The reader gets to meet so many characters that at least one of them is bound to be your new best friend. This is what happened to me. These characters became real to me and I couldn't wait for the next book. Each time a new book came out in the series, I would reread the series or at least the book before the new one coming out. For those of you that don't know, this series is 14 books long, and though Robert Jordan published the first book in 1990 and book 14 was just released this January 2013. This is a long time to be following the same characters, not knowing how their story will end. I think this is another reason why the characters felt so real to me. Because each time a new book came out it was like catching up with old friends to see what their life has been like while you were separated.
When my favorite author, Robert Jordan, passed away in 2007 I was devastated. Not only did the world lose a brilliant writer, but I thought I may never get to finish the story of some of my best friends. I felt many different emotions when Tor announced that the series would be finished by Brandon Sanderson. I had never heard of this guy before and while I was glad I would be able to finish reading about my friends, I was worried that anyone else could really continue to portray my friends and their story in they way that they deserved. So when the first of the last three books came out, I was pleasantly surprised with the results. There were only a few spots where I could tell the style of writing was a little different. I was able to meet Brandon Sanderson shortly after this book came out. My brilliant words to him went something like this, "I'm so glad you didn't screw it up!" (Yes, my speaking words are never as eloquent as my written ones.)

When book 13 came out, I could finally feel the difference between the two voices in that book. (You read my thoughts on that here.) My husband I just finished the last book in this series and my friends finally have an ending. I found parts of the book very satisfying and other parts not so much. But all in all I loved the culmination of events that led to the ultimate battle between good and evil and I felt truth and light shining through the lines in this story. Now was I disappointed that my favorite character from book one never got the wedding she dreamt about? Definitely! Though, being the good friend that I am, I will probably just throw her a wedding myself, it will be a private ceremony on my computer only of course, but I need closure! LOL!
This all brings me to my point. I want to thank the people responsible for making sure my favorite book series was finished. Thank you, Brandon Sanderson for taking on this monumental task and doing it so well. You were able to portray the characters in such a way that they stayed true to themselves. I can tell that they were your close friends too and this kind of makes us friends automatically! I'm so glad Tor chose you to finish this book, not only did you do a good job, but I have been able to read your other books and have gained a new favorite author.
I also want to thank Robert Jordan's wife, Harriet for her contributions to this series from the beginning. I know that my husband is my partner in all things, including my writing. He is my sounding board and many times, my muse. I tell him all about my story and sometimes I feel he is more invested than me! I know that if I were in the same situation as Robert Jordan, I would feel good knowing that my husband could help another author to finish my story and keep it true to my vision. Thank you, Harriet for your devotion to this series and for keeping his vision alive even when it must have been so difficult for you. I truly admire the strength and love it took to see this project through to the end.
Thank you to Tor for publishing my favorite books of all time! It truly takes a village to build a book series as wonderful as "The Wheel of Time."

Good Writers Vs. Bad Writers

2013-04-25T20:07:00.001-06:00

My post today is quick. It's just a little thought - a little nudge of encouragement. Don't give up. Don't ever stop. You never know when what you have to say could make a positive difference to someone's life. Here is a thought from writer Jeff Goins, on the difference between good and bad writers:

The difference between good writers and bad writers has little to do with skill. It has to do with perseverance.

Bad writers quit. Good writers keep going. That’s all there is to it.

Spot the the Mistake...

2013-04-24T02:41:00.000-06:00

At my writing club last weekend one of the exercises was to correct all the errors (including poor sentence construction and badly worded phrases) in the following piece about a political rally:

When Tom Williamson came onto the stage the room changed atmosphere immediately. You could of heard a pin drop. Everyone's attention was riveted on the politician, they sat completely stationery and they didn't comment or even whisper; just listened.

Despite being his wife I was just as riveted as the rest of the audience. As he spoke I watched him, thinking he’s really handsome as well as smart. He wasn't holding any notes and didn't look once at the lap-top on the table, he kept eye contact with the audience the hole time.

“They want to sensor our free press” he said! “But only because they want to sensor me.”

I couldn't help myself I shouted “Here here” because he was right they had been trying to shut him up for years.

When his talk was finished I leapt off of my chair, ran to the front of the room, climbed onto the stage and threw my arms around Tom’s surprised body in a big hug.

Did you spot them all? I counted seventeen errors in just 160 words, and none of them were squiggly-underlined in either red or green by Word or Google. In other words if the author was relying on technology to correct his/her errors, then this was an epic fail.

Here's another sobering fact. All of these errors are copied from published books I have read recently. Four of them came from one particular book. It goes to show why editing is so important, and why no author should publish a book which hasn't been properly edited.

Did you spot five or more errors? Then you could of have helped out the author by highlighting necessary corrections where Word and Google failed. You don't need to be a professional editor with a degree in English Language in order to gently remind a fellow author about passive voice, using italics for reported thought, or the difference between stationary and stationery.

It's partly because we writers, who labour in splendid and lonely isolation, need to support each other in our endeavours that I have created a new Facebook group for authors who would be prepared to edit each other's work. It's called the Author's Editing Co-Operative. I hope you'll come along and join us. (Click on this link to do so.)

Talking Tuesday: Why do I Write?

2013-04-23T08:55:00.000-06:00

My messy Little Man at a horse show.

Most writers have their ups and downs. One day you are on the top of the world writing the worlds best novel, the next day you are certain that pages of your writing are not even fit to wipe a bottom. It can be hard to maintain the confidence to continue. It awakes the question within us, "Why do I write?".

If you have not figured out what you are writing for, giving up is an easy thing to do. Whether we like to admit it or not writing can get messy. Sometime our first drafts would embarrass us more than messing our pants. Don't give up in the early stages.

Hopefully, the answer you will find to the "Why do I write?" question is "I love writing, it makes me happy." You will need to rely on that answer at the low moments when it is hard to press on. I hope that you will find the joy in the ups and the downs as well. Getting messy can be fun. Just because we may not want anyone to ever read our rough drafts, doesn't mean we cannot enjoy drafting them.

Go write and have fun.

Don't give up.

It’s a Big, Big World

2013-04-22T05:30:00.000-06:00

(slightly rambling post this week, but it does have a point. I think.)

Ricardo, our delightful guide to Grand Bahama Island

One thing about life that absolutely fascinates me is how big and diverse our world is. I remember when I was watching the Olympics last summer, I was so taken by the fact that here were these people who have basically dedicated their entire lives to a sport that never really crossed my mind until I watched them fulfilling their life’s dream on television. Rhythmic gymnastics? Just not something I think about on a regular basis. But there were these competitors who eat, sleep, and breathe it day in and day out. How different their lives must be from mine.

As an American suburban mom within the world of Blogger, Pinterest, and Facebook, I often fall into the subconscious assumption that the majority of women out there are like me- we’re doing crafty things, trying to raise our kids to be good people, looking for new recipes for our families. But then I stop to really think about it. Did you know that Americans only make up 4.45% of the world’s population? And if you consider the fact that only half of those are women and even less than those are suburban stay-at-home moms...well, while we mommies might have a big presence on the web, don’t let it fool you. The world is big, friends. We are but a minute blip on the radar screen.

My husband always thinks I’m weird because this fascination with diversity leads me to watch National Geographic shows about remote cultures in places with unpronounceable names, and shows about drug addicts, people who want sex changes, and individuals with all sorts of other peculiar habits or viewpoints. I like to read books about all kinds of people too- celebrities, people in history, ordinary people who are changing the world (or their corner of it) and so on.

As I read and watch, I always find myself asking how I could put myself in that person’s shoes, and trying to find some common thread that links us. I guess I’ve always been an empathetic person (major believer in the “Can’t we all just get along?” philosophy) and closed-mindedness makes me crazy. I think that the more we seek to understand one another, the more love we can have for each other.

This desire for connection with others of the human race leads me to another passion: travel. I come by it honestly- my mom was a stewardess for PanAm back in the day and she and my dad met when they were both working for the airlines. They were both even travel agents at one time. I’ve always felt this need to see the world. I have a Pinterest board filled with photos of places I want to visit. I spend my evenings trolling travel deals sites and planning itineraries for pretend trips.

Any other fans of author Adriana Trigiani out there? Her books always make me crave Italy. Lake Como is breathtaking.

Sadly, the farthest I’ve gotten is the Bahamas. But while I was there, the one thing I did that I loved even more than the incredible beaches was the kayak tour. Our native tour guide told us the history of the islands and he was a wealth of information about the culture and ecology there (and he was really funny). One of my other favorite parts of the trip was the conversation I had with my masseuse during my massage. She was from another island and we talked about her family (she had young kids too) and what it was like to grow up there. When my husband and I went out shopping in the afternoon one day, I remember seeing all the school children walking home in their school uniforms, and something about seeing them just living their lives there on that tiny island was so fascinating to me.

What does this have to do with writing? Well, I recently got a writing gig that I’m hoping will help me close the financial gap between my home and the rest of this great big world. I’m putting away just a little bit each week in hopes that I can achieve my dream to become more global. I know a lot of it will have to wait until the kids are grown, but I also hope that we can give them the gift of seeing the world when they’re young so that they can develop a more global worldview.

So now you know. Getting published isn’t my only big dream- how about you?

:-) Kasey

A quick side note: I remember when we were in the airplane flying over the islands I looked down at the incredible beauty below me and I was struck by how varied the landscapes of the planet are. I love how mountain ranges and grand canyons can be just as awe-inspiring and thrilling as ridiculously clear blue water and white sand beaches. Then I thought about how much I love to craft and use different materials and create different pieces. A huge grin crossed my face as I realized how much alike my Creator and I are. :-)