Ramblings

Rant: How-To (correctly) Walk Your Dog

2012-09-03T16:11:00.003-07:00

I don't have a dog, so I can't say I know how to walk a dog from personal experience. But, come on, it's not that hard.

Step One: Put a leash on your dog.
Step Two: Walk on the left side of the road or a sidewalk.
Step Three: Avoid traffic.

Simple, right?

You'd think so. But...no.

Today on the way home from errands I saw two examples of how not to walk your dog.

The first lady was doing something correctly, she was using a sidewalk on a busy road so as to not endanger her dog. She was doing a great job of keeping her dog safe and out of traffic.

But, my problem with her was that she was PUSHING her dog - not walking - PUSHING. As in, the dog was enclosed in a mesh stroller and she was pushing him.

Really?!

Don't dogs enjoy being outside on walks? Don't they love the sights and smells of nature? Don't they like peeing every 5 seconds on everything they pass? They can do none of these things from an enclosed stroller. It was one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen.

The second dog-walker I passed was actually a pair of dog walkers - so they were doubly disappointing. Again, they had one part right, but seemed to neglect the second and third step.

It was a couple and they each had a dog on a leash. Congratulations! You're letting your dog use their own legs and explore the outdoors under your supervision. Way to go!

But...these bozos were walking on the right side of the road, in the middle of the right side of the road. What made this worse was when they heard our car coming (cause how could you NOT hear our car) they didn't budge! They didn't move a foot out of the way. They didn't even pull their dogs in close to protect them from the car. How can you just ignore oncoming machinery that could kill your pet? How can you keep walking in the middle of the road when a car is coming?

How do you know that the driver sees you and is going to drive around you? You can't know that. It's especially hard to know that when you're walking on the wrong side of the road and therefore don't even see the driver.

The driver could be texting, or talking on the phone, or rocking out to some sweet Steve Winwood jams - in other words - they could be distracted and not see you!

(And yes, I'm aware that if the driver of a car was texting while driving and hit you and your dog, it'd be their fault. But take some personal responsibility and get out of the way. Geez.)

That's why you step to the side of the road when a car comes. It's not only polite, it's what's safest for you and your dogs.

So, in case you all missed it - when walking your dog:

Let the dog walk, stay on the left side of the road, and step to the side of the road when a car comes.

/End Rant.

Oh, wait...I have an Etsy shop? (and a Blog, apparently)

2012-08-20T04:34:00.001-07:00

So...after a long hiatus (over a year, maybe year and a half? I don't quite remember) I've decided to re-open my Etsy shop in an attempt to make some mad money.

I had closed down originally as I was pregnant and VERY sick with 24 hour relentless morning sickness. Looking at a computer screen made me vomit...and well...you can't have an Etsy store without looking at a computer! The sales weren't worth the extra stomach problems.

Then I had the baby that caused the morning sickness and I was living life with no sleep. I got back into my regular everyday job, but didn't have the time for Etsy. I didn't have time for sleep either, which made life quite interesting and somewhat surreal. I'll never understand how newborns manage to sleep all the time, and their parents don't sleep at all. Isn't there some kind of middle ground we can reach? A compromise those babies can agree to so that maybe we could get 4 hours of sleep a night? That's not too much to ask, they can have the other 20 hours of the day to sleep. And really, you know you don't get enough rest when 4 hours of sleep is your White Whale.

Now that my son is 10 months (and still has bouts of constant wakefullness due to those awful teeth that seem to be taking their sweet lousy time to get here) my life is starting to even out and I decided to re-open the shop with my in-stock inventory.

I had a box of pretty lovelies that I had put away - but they deserve homes and wonderful owners who will treasure them as unique one-of-a-kind pieces.

So if you, or someone you know, loves to be different, loves to be ecclectic, or bohemian, and loves to have adornments that you can't get at a department store, then come my way and visit me on Etsy!

I make everything my self, and most pieces are one of a kind.

See something you like? Use the coupon code FBFRIEND20 for a 20% discount on your order! And friend me on Facebook to keep up with shop inventory and other cool things I find on Etsy!

Sex and T.V.

2010-10-27T11:00:00.000-07:00

I've never considered myself a prude. I curse and drink and laugh at crude jokes...but I'm starting to think there's just too much sex on tv.

I'm not talking about scantily-clad women, or sexual innuendos - I'm talking about the actual act of sex. I think Marge Simpson said it best: "Fox turned into a hard-core porn channel so gradually I didn't even notice." This is something that has happened over the past few decades - slowly and gradually TV gets more and more sexually explicit until eventually it will be all porn all the time. Back in the day (the 1950's - 30 years before I was born, btw) Lucille Ball couldn't even say the word 'pregnant' and Mary Tyler Moore's pants couldn't 'cup' her buttocks.

And look at how far we've come...

I've seen scenes on TV (I don't have cable - I only get the basic networks) which only differed from porn in that there was no genitalia showing - but they did have two nude bodies humping each other.

Is it just me, or is that too graphic for basic cable?

Top Ten: Things I like about the morning...

2010-10-27T06:31:00.000-07:00

1. Waking up next to my husband
2. Coffee (it just doesn't feel right to drink it any other time of the day)
3. The cool crisp air
4. The quiet
5. The fact that I can spend most of the morning sleeping
6. The feeling that I can do anything I want with my day - even though most of the times that isn't true
7. Coffee again (I usually have at least two cups)
8. Checking Etsy to see if I've had any new sales overnight (LOVE when that happens!)
9. Taking a nice long hot shower
10. More coffee - I'm still feeling sleepy

Disappointments of the week...

2010-10-25T13:25:00.000-07:00

Disappointment #1: The film Robin Hood with Russel Crowe:

My husband I rented this last night from RedBox. First off, Robin only robbed the rich to feed the poor once. But the worst part was that he fought for Prince John. Really?! Prince John was an @$$...the original Robin Hood would never have ridden into battle for the dude or even against the French (according to my husband, the historian) because, most importantly, there was no French Invasion of the coast for Robin Hood to even consider defending. (In fact, that whole climatic battle scene at the end reminded me strangely of D-Day in Saving Private Ryan - except they used swords and arrows instead of guns - and there were no Germans involved.) The minute they showed Robin defending Prince John was the moment I realized the movie stunk.

It seemed to me that they were setting themselves up for the 'real' Robin Hood film I'm sure they want to make by showing how Robin became an outlaw, but they did it so horribly that I was very disappointed.

The only redeeming part of the film was Cate Blanchett, whom I love in every role she has. She depicted a strong, sexy, and independent woman - someone I can look up to. She was a noblewoman who wasn't afraid to get her hands dirty and go in after that goat that was stuck in the mud herself while the men sat around and watched.

Disappointment #2: Sierra Mist Natural

I really like that there is finally a soda that does not use high fructose corn syrup (which I am avoiding) but I really hate that this soda causes an extreme amount of burping. Seriously, I've never burped so much in one sitting than when I drink a can of this stuff.

It tastes great, but is best drunk in the privacy of your home and away from civilized company.

Disappointment #3: House-Cleaning

I am yet again surprised and disappointed that my house has yet to figure out how to keep itself clean. Maybe someday it will grow up and take some responsibility for itself. But until then I'm stuck vacuuming, scrubbing, dusting and washing in order to keep this place looking decent. Stupid house....

On Etsy and sales and whatnot...

2010-10-22T06:50:00.000-07:00

Well, I've made 15 sales on Etsy so far, and must say I have mixed feelings about it.

On one hand, 15 sales is a lot for only being open a little over a month.

But...

(there's always a butt involved, isn't there...at least this butt isn't nasty...it's kinda nice)

But...most of those sales came from my family and friends.

I feel like I'm having a very slow start in getting unknown buyers to shop in my store. And whenever I do have one, I get so excited that I can't stop smiling for at least 24 hours. (seriously, last time it happened my cheeks started hurting).

So I'm trying out all the things those seasoned Etsy Sellers with thousands of sales recommend:

a. I've joined Twitter - something I vowed never to do
b. I've begun renewing my items on Etsy - at least, I started doing this once I realized I didn't have to wait 4 months for them to expire *sigh at my Etsygnorance* (and yes, I just made that word up - I think it works nicely)
c. I've been running sales and promoting them (mainly to see if my prices are too high)
d. I'm posting all my pictures and sale info on my shop's Facebook page
e. I've made my titles and descriptions more descriptive (imageine that!) to get sales from searches, and revamped my keywords

I'm hoping that all this work will start to show some pay-off and I start to see customers that haven't known me since I was in diapers.

Speaking of diapers...I'm trying to drum up some interest in custom photo pendants among those same people who have known my diaper-days. It's a unique offering that my friends and family don't have access to anywhere else and I'm hoping that word of mouth will be my best form of advertising.

You know you've waited too long...

2010-10-21T07:49:00.000-07:00

...to wash the dishes when you can't remember what meals you cooked in the dirty pots and pans.

Seriously, there's a dirty skillet in the sink and I have no memory of using it. It's just been in the sink soaking for a week. Heck, I can hardly remember what I ate yesterday, let alone 7 days ago.

I really need to keep up with these dishes better.

Or maybe my husband needs to...either way, one of us has to wash these things more often.

Blow You Like a Hurricane

2010-10-15T05:05:00.000-07:00

...things that annoy me...
Before I go any further, this post is not about what you think it is- so get yer mind outta the gutter. It's about the classic rock song, Rock You Like a Hurricane by The Scorpions

Why does this song annoy me? Why do I have to change the station every time this song comes on the radio? Why has my husband gotten sick and tired of hearing me rant about this song?

Because hurricanes don't rock, they blow. Hurricanes are driven by wind - wind blows.

It's scientific fact. Seriously. Go look it up if you don't believe me.

Now, a better phrase would have been Rock You Like an Earthquake. Why? Earthquakes are made from rocks shifting and grinding. They cause the earth to rumble and shake beneath your feet. The whole thing is driven by rocks. Therefore, if something in nature is rocking...most likely it's caused by an earthquake.

So to clarify:

Earthquakes Rock
Hurricanes Blow

I will accept one of the two lyrics in substitution:

Rock you like an earthquake
or
Blow you like a hurricane.

The next time you sing along with this song, please substitute one of the above lyrics and show your support for scientific accuracy in rock music.

Old People and B.O.

2010-10-14T08:58:00.000-07:00

...things that annoy me...

Yep, this post is about Body Odor, 'cause someone's got to say something...and apparently that someone is me.

It's a strange phenomenon that happens as people age: they forget that B.O. exists. They think they smell fine. They think that B.O. only comes from sweating and as they don't sweat, they don't smell.

They are wrong...so very wrong, and we're paying for this mistake. 'Cause the person with the BO doesn't know they have it...but the rest of us find out every time they lift their arms to wave, or a gust of wind blows those smelly particles into our nostrils.

I've been having this problem with my own Grandma, whom I love. But love doesn't deodorize the armpits. One time my mom and I tried to tell her kindly and sweetly (with lots of love and kisses) that she had bad B.O. and needed to start putting on deodorant every day.

It did not go well.

You would have thought that we told her we just killed an innocent kitten, she was that upset. She started to cry and refused to accept the fact that she smelled bad. I can see her reasoning...she didn't smell anything, so the smell couldn't exist. But B.O. doesn't follow the normal laws of nature. Even if you don't smell it, the smell is still there - lingering and waiting for an unaccustomed nose to get close before *BAM* it hits you like a brick wall. (Or a wall made of moldy old cheese, which is more likely as this is a smelly wall.)

This is something that all of us have to look forward to as we age. A complete ignorance when it comes to body odor.

Old people seem to forget what it was like to be around smelly people, or how hard (and necessary) it was to get their 12 year old son to wear deodorant.

I remember when my youngest brother got to that 'smelly' stage. It took a bit of time and a lot of 'Did you put on deodorant today?' But eventually he got the message and altered his habits so that we didn't have to suffer. Did he ever smell a bad odor on himeself? Probably not...but that didn't mean it wasn't there.

I've resigned to the fact that my Grandma will always have B.O. I try to think of it as one of her quirks. But what I try to do the most is not breathe in too deeply when I give her a hug.