Biblical Womanhood

Avoiding Two Lamentable Errors on Human Sexuality

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Thu, 29 Nov 2012 18:21:00 +0000

This is how I feel about it. I'm not sure if all the girls agree, and that is fine. But I thought this was very clear and very Biblical:

Quiet Time, Fishing Line, and Jesus

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Fri, 02 Nov 2012 00:27:00 +0000

I came across this quote earlier this week:

“It has been well said that if a great king were to bring us a great heap of gold and bid us take as much as we could count in a day, we would make a long day of it; we would begin early in the morning, and in the evening we would not withhold our hand.” Unknown

The great King, Jesus, has bought and brought us a much greater treasure than a heap of gold yet we revere Him not!

Years ago, when my children were toddlers and I was given a new life in Christ, I heard from the Bible, godly women & their husbands, the Internet, literature, and personal friends the importance of cultivating a quiet time daily to attend to the richness of Christ. Someone told me if I had to lock myself in the bathroom to make it happen then so be it! Others spoke of wearing a hat that everyone knew to be Momma's quiet time reminder.

As our Pastor diligently continues to remind us, God asks us to consider this:

“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate on and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money. Therefore, I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so richly clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore, do not be anxious saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore, do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient is it’s own trouble.” Matt 6:24-34

Though I too often fail to honor God by seeking him routinely in prayer, reading the Word, confessing and listening, when I capitalize on the time God has given me, the results are immediate and powerful!

Culling out time in our daily schedules results in abundant blessings far outweighing simple stones like silver & gold! The rewards are eternal!

My husband and I were on the pier overlooking the ocean last week and he was showing me how a pole was rigged to catch a King Mackerel. The line was dropped with a heavy weight and off of it a second line carried the bait which floated near the surface. I kept hearing a strange high pitched ringing as we spoke. David said that was the sound of the wind passing by the taut line causing it to “sing”… May we be anchored so firmly in Christ that as the winds blow by we “sing” too!

Consider making a long day of counting Him worthy and I pray He continues to convict us of our need!

"...if anyone makes the assistance of grace depend on the humility or obedience of man and does not agree that it is a gift of grace itself that we are obedient and humble, he contradicts the Apostle who says, "What have you that you did not receive?" (1 Cor. 4:7), and, "But by the grace of God I am what I am" (1 Cor. 15:10). (Council of Orange: Canon 6)

To God be the glory!

introducing amy!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Wed, 24 Oct 2012 01:18:00 +0000

I've been sitting at Starbucks for 2 hours....finding every excuse to not write and not being able to have a straight thought about what to write. When someone is asked to introduce themselves or talk about their life with God, there is the temptation to want to say the right things, show how dramatically God has moved, what He has taught you and led you through. Then you read other people's accounts and you think, "Man, I don't have it together at all.....I have so far to go." That is when I realize..... "hmmm...maybe this is exactly where God wants me to be." The truth is, I don't have it together, my life and heart is generally a mess. And I have so far to go in my walk with Jesus.

My journey with Jesus began at birth. I had the privilege of being born into a Christian family. My parents went to church and took my sister and I from the time I could remember. I don't have a memory that doesn't include church, singing songs about Jesus and reading stories from the Bible. I loved going to church and singing all of the songs I had been taught about Jesus. Then when I was 5 years old, I made confession of faith and accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I was baptized and we celebrated my decision with ice cream at my favorite place! Looking back, all I remember is being baptized and feeling like I was gonna drown, realizing my Momma didn't pack clean undies for me - so I had to go commando, and being SO excited to go to Pixie's and get a swirl cone. My sister had recently been baptized and taken to Pixie's so I wanted to do the same. I don't remember any kind of big change after that evening. My life proceeded as normal. I loved being in church! As I grew, church became a bigger and bigger part of my life. As I entered junior high/high school, youth group was my life. All that I did revolved around youth group. If there was a mission trip, I went. If there was a weekend retreat, I was there. My Christanity was upheld by the highs that were experienced on each retreat, trip, convention. I wasn't taught to do in the low times. There was an emphasis on having daily devotions....such an emphasis that it came out like a guilt trip if it wasn't done. It wasn't until college that I began to realize how to live life in the day to day - not just the highs.

I could write pages more of what God has done in my life since my high school and college years. I could give you minute details of my walk with Jesus. I could tell you how God has allowed some heart wrenching things in my life only to allow some of the deepest healing and satisfaction in Him that I would have never found without the pain. I could tell you of the insane amounts of joy - pure, Jesus drenched joy - that have seeped into every corner of my being. All of these things would give glory to God and hopefully show you what God can do with a life. But there are two words that would describe it all.. ...But God!!

But God saved me from the pits of hell, by His sovereign grace and mercy.

But God allowed my parents to divorce when I was 19 to teach me immense joy despite my circumstances.

But God...led me to an amazing college that would provide the friends and mentors that I would need to grow and start to become the woman He was calling me to be...then led me to the an incredible seminary and to the friends that would be the glue to hold me together.

But God....in His sovereign mercy allowed me to go through the end of my own marriage and be a single Momma at 29 to teach me who I am in Him and that He has an incredible plan even though the pain was more than I could bear.

But God....He gave me an incredible little boy to begin the healing process in my life when it was just he and I.

But God...let me feel like I was stranded on an island waiting for His plan to unfold.

But God...turned incredible heartbreak into incredible joy and peace.

But God...brought an amazing man into my life to show me how a wife should be loved by her husband, how a son should be loved by his daddy and how a family can be centered on Him and Him alone.

There's been some incredible things and some heart breaking things that God has brought into my life. But I know that everything that has come into my life has passed through God's strong and loving hands. I know that everything that has happened has been for His glory and for my growth. The past 32 years of my life have been pretty amazing...I can't wait to see what God has in store for the next however many He allows me to be on this earth.

Our Role as Women

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Fri, 28 Sep 2012 01:22:00 +0000

As women, I believe we were created to be a helpmate- not the career-driven women which society has pushed upon us women. God created us to take care of the house and raise children. You are probably thinking, “Wow, Sarah, that is so pretentious and closed-minded of you to claim that.” I did not always believe this was our role as women though. My mom is a very hardworking, amazing, but career-driven woman. Growing up, I was somewhat confused about my role as a women, just based on my parents relationship. (Disclaimer: my parents are both absolutely amazing and I love them both so very much!!). My mom is a doctor and worked all day, then would come home, make dinner, do laundry, take care of us kids and do it all over the next day. Essentially, she was trying to do two full time jobs as once!! (I sincerely do believe that running a house and being a mom is a full time job!!) So, this was my paradigm growing up. When I got to college, I chose pre-med as a major, desiring to follow in her footsteps. It was around that time that I started a relationship with God and started to learn about biblical womanhood and the difference between men and women.

As I grew in my relationship with God, my desire to serve Him and glorify Him grew more and more. Us women were created to serve and glorify God in a different way than men. We are to be the helpmate, supporter, encourager. This does NOT mean however, that our ideas, dreams and desires don't matter. THEY DO MATTER! There are many bible verses that speak of wives submitting to their husbands, such as Ephesians 5:22. Men are called to be the spiritual leader of the household and women are to follow their lead, thus submitting to their husband. I believe that one reason why women get offended by and struggle with this verse is because they are yoked with a man whose authority they do not respect. As women, we need to encourage the men around us to step up and be the men of God and spiritual leaders God has created them to be!

So, women, I leave you with this small piece of advice. DO NOT SETTLE AND DO NOT PURSUE A MAN. Let the man pursue you, make him earn your trust and allow him to lead. I loveeee the way Blair put it: “ If you are a woman in a relationship, your role is to help your husband and support him as leader. You should feel honored and important, but also humble and submissive to the leader in your family.” Amen, sister! When you let the man do what the man is supposed to do in a relationship, life is just so much sweeter. You will feel truly loved, respected and appreciated and will in turn be able to give love, respect and appreciation back in a much more genuine and sincere way.

Eve and Us.

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Sun, 23 Sep 2012 04:10:00 +0000

Women and men are the same in many ways. We are all created in the image of God (Gen. 1:27). We are all human beings with (mostly) similar features. We all have personalities. We all are equal in the sight of God. We are all sinners.

However, we differ in many ways. I would go as far as to say that we are fundamentally different. There are some things that are just normal for men, and normal for women. There are things that men were created for, and different things that women were created for. We see it even at early ages of our children. Boys are rowdy and rambunctious, like to hit each other, and build cars out of legos. Girls are calmer and gentler, like to hug, and play with Barbies. As teenagers, boys get confused about what their girlfriends are mad about, and girls get mad because their boyfriends don't understand what they've done! As adults, men handle arguments by walking out and blowing off steam. Women handle arguments by talking about their feelings.

The list could go on and on, but enough about the differences that I notice between the genders. Let's see what the Bible says about it. Here we pick up in Genesis 2 right after Adam was created. Remember that the first man and woman, and the first marriage, are setting the pace for the rest of us and defining our roles and responsibilities.

    The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it. And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, “You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.”
    Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Now out of the ground the LORD God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said,
    “This at last is bone of my bones
        and flesh of my flesh;
    she shall be called Woman,
        because she was taken out of Man.”
    Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
(Genesis 2:15-25 ESV)

There are a few things to notice here:

1) Man and woman were different from other creatures. They had dominion over all the other creatures. Man and woman were uniquely made in the image of God, and were above all the rest of creation. This is why Adam was given the responsibility of naming all the animals.

2) Man and woman were different from each other. They were created at different times, in different ways, and for different purposes. They were also given different jobs. Adam's job was to work and keep the garden. Eve's job was to be Adam's helper-to support him in his job. This set the pattern for men and women for the rest of time, and still holds true today.

3) Adam was established as the head of the family. The authority to name the other creatures showed Adam's rule over them. Notice that Adam names Eve as well. Of course, there is still the blatant difference between Eve and the rest of creation. She is Adam's helpmate, tailor-fit to him. Their covenant is described right here. He loves her and will hold fast to her. She is a part of him. The fact that he names her doesn't undermine her or place her down with the animals, but it underlines his role in their relationship as a loving leader. Remember, this is going to be a huge picture throughout the Bible of Christ and His church, so we don't want to misunderstand this relationship.

2) Eve was a Helper. Many women are actually offended by this passage, and want to twist it so it doesn't hurt their pride. They think it is condescending, belittling women's ability and importance. This isn't true at all. Again, women are equal with men. Both have essential roles and responsibilities. If you are a woman in a relationship, your role is to help your husband and support him as leader. You should feel honored and important, but also humble and submissive to the leader in your family.

3) Eve was fit specifically for Adam. None of the animals would have been a good helper for Adam. Only another human being, made in God's image, would do. She was not only made for him, but from him. Flesh of his flesh. I could be wrong, but to me this is a reminder of us being made in God's image. Eve was literally a part of Adam-how could they not be incredibly in love and cherish one another? This should remind us that we, the Church, are made in God's image, by Him and from Him and of Him. And that is an even greater love and more amazing covenant than that of Adam and Eve.

This passage says so much about who women were created to be, and our relationships with men, and our individual/corporate relationships with God. This is really only touching the very surface on these topics, but it is a wonderful place to start and study, and to refer back to. This is the starting point--the foundation to build on. There is much more we can look at, but we will look at more another time.

To finish it up...you know that ridiculous commercial where the man and woman are singing "Anything you can do, I can do better?" Yeah, that bothers me so much. Women, we need to accept and embrace the fact that we are different from men. We don't need to compete with them, just like they don't need to compete with us. We don't have to feel inadequate, and we cannot feel superior. Unlike popular culture will tell you now, feminism shouldn't be about making sure we can do absolutely everything a man can do. Trying to step into a man's role goes against God's design for men and women (same goes for men trying to step into a woman's role). True femininity is being exactly who God created you, as a woman, to be.

Update!

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Fri, 21 Sep 2012 14:49:00 +0000

Hello lovely people. Sorry for the big build up and then completely not posting anything for a long time. That was my fault...I kind of assigned everyone an October topic and completely forgot that there was a month in between August and October. Plus I got kind of slammed with work and school starting back all of a sudden. My B.

So, let me begin by saying: THANK YOU! To everyone who has started following our blog and has been waiting patiently for me to actually get a move on with this thing. Thank you, also, to the girls who are contributing and have written posts so far! Y'all are the bomb diggity.

I am finishing up the first post, and soon we will be diving into the whole world of Biblical womanhood goodness. Hang tight.

introducing michele

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Mon, 27 Aug 2012 03:04:00 +0000

Hi! My name is Michele... and I am humbled to be blogging beside such wonderful people! I love Jesus, learning new things especially spiritually, fumbling around at marriage, parenting, Aunting (is that a word?), after-schooling (I work at an elem school in the after school program), traveling & growing things....to name a few! My dashing husband is David and by God's provident hand, we met & were married 16 years ago. He is a machinist and loves fishing for flounder, music, walks in the woods, cooking, and looking after me! We are the grateful parents of 2 lovely young ladies! Emily is 15 and Rachel is 13. They are wonderful, beautiful, delightful, smart, deeply caring people! I'll have to tell you more as we go!!

My Mom & Dad, Step Mom, Sister, Brother, and sister in law have been hugely influential in my journey as well as many others! I'd love to share some of those stories sometime! I am so thankful that my family is full of prayer partners and encouragers!

But it wasn't always that way...None of my family walked in the faith that we have now through Christ! I was brought up Catholic with nuns & priests comprising the majority of my teachers. I remember my mom taking me to church as a child and to the chapel times during school... I didn't actually have faith in God or in Jesus...I just went to church because Mom took me. I think I wanted to believe He was real but so many difficult things happened that I came to doubt He did care at all...When I made my first visit to church after about 15 years of absence I was terrified! But I went because my life was a mess and despite all my own efforts, I could not straighten myself out!

God knew He would be the answer to my problems...

He graciously brought me to my knees...

I was guilty of putting my own desires and wants and fun and work and relationships above the God who gifted me to be able to even participate in those things.

It was a struggle every week to go to go to church. But He kept drawing me back...

It was difficult to hear the things said that I needed to hear. But He knew it would be best for me...

It was difficult to be loved by people who I barely knew. But He gave them to me as a gift...

It was just plain difficult all the way around....and it still is in a good way...

"Man . . . is few of days and full of trouble." Job 14:1

But God has continued to show us that His Son, His Word, His plan for redeeming His people, His church is precious and us being a part of it is precious. And the joy that comes from receiving such great gifts from The Greatest Giver is inconceivable!

And I still struggle with Him

But He steadfastly draws me to Himself

To the heavenly things

To Himself

To His Word

To His people

To His mercy & kindness

To His faithfulness & devotion

To His abiding love and affection

To His discipline which corrects me

Not to the things of this earth that remain a short while and fade from dust to dust

But to Him & things eternal & everlasting...like His love & justice

This is a quote by a man of God now deceased:

"We should love, but we should love with the love that expects death, and that reckons upon separations."

This is the love of God.... that He cares enough not just to to want to spare us from death & separation from Him but to make a way that we can live full of joy...that God gave....He gave Himself...completely...when He reckoned to give His Son, Jesus...

as a payment for our sin... not begrudgingly as we give...but planned from the beginning of time for His joy and ours...so that we may bask in Him and the life He claims in us forever! And that we may share this love with others!

I'm excited to take this blogging journey with you!

introducing erin (coming to christ)

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Sat, 25 Aug 2012 00:15:00 +0000

     My name is Erin Cox, I’m 18, I’ll be a college freshman this fall at a fancy Bible school in Manhattan, my fiancée is in the process of enlisting in the United States Navy and life is sweet to say the least and Christ is within all of those things and so much more, but it hasn’t always been this way.

     I started out my life in a Christian up-bringing with incredible grandparents who put an emphasis on the importance of God in my life. There came a summer, however, where I went to live with my mom (who is an incredible and strong woman whom I love whole heartedly) and her home was much less structured. We didn’t go to church, read our bibles or pray for our meals or any of the other things I’d previously been brought up to do, which was of course the extent of my walk with Christ at that point in my life.

     Life was average, not bad and not great, which is truly tragic when one looks back at all of their unforeseen potential. I woke up, went to school, spent time with various friends and repeated my routine day after day. Those things filled my all of my time with monotony except for in the summers; summers with my mom were unique because for about a week every summer my mom would send me to a spectacular Christian camp! Here at camp (Cross Bar X Youth Ranch: I’d encourage anyone to check it out) we read our Bibles, we had in-depth thought provoking conversation and we worshipped God. These few weeks are some of my best memories. Cross Bar X quickly became a second home for me in a lot of ways, and I took advantage of all the retreats and other things that they offered outside of their summer programs.

     As I grew older I also began to grow bored with the tedium that was my life. I was unsatisfied, and so I began looking for ways to purge that from my life, and what I found and where I found it was far away from childhood church attendance or summer camp.

     I quickly established myself amongst unsavory characters that cared very little for their own lives and even less for mine. In that group we dabbled with things like drugs, self-harm and frequented parties where there was booze and other things. Needless to say I was plummeting in a downward spiral that put me on the fast track to rock bottom. My grades nosedived and my relationships with my family members quickly began to deteriorate. My cry for help was a loud one of misplaced angst and a desire to be heard that manifested itself in my own appalling behavior. There and then if you had told me I’d be here, contributing to a blog like this I would have laughed, out loud and in your face.

     I was broken, I had allowed my soul to fall prey to sin and I became comfortable with my own iniquities and flaunted them for the world to see. I raised my banner of surrender high and renounced any previous desire I had to battle the depths of sin within my heart. I had ceased to care what happened to me, to the people around me, or to anyone else. I lived in the moment and I lived only to serve myself solitarily, which is idolatry in its worst form.

     Lost and without a true identity of my own I continued to attempt to forge a life for myself (which for those of us who have been in that position is an impossibly difficult endeavor that will only leave you even more weary than when you started out.) People all around me tried to coax me out of the self-centered and destructive behavior that I had adopted, and with a lot of effort and patience a few even managed to do it.

     Caily Wilbanks, being one of them, is truly a terrific friend (and a soon-to-be bridesmaid of mine) and put a lot of her own personal efforts in to getting me out of this hole I had dug myself. She tried very hard to get me out of the house and to attend a Bible study hosted at the camp I told you about earlier. Uninterested and apathetic I had excuse after excuse for why I just couldn’t make it week after week. “I can’t, I have to study for finals. I don’t have a ride. Family’s in town…. Blah, blah, blah.” And Caily, being as clever as she is, decided to come to my house (completely unbeknownst to me) to give me that ride to Bible study that I’d been incapable of arranging previously. And so, without excuse, or a way out I began to attend Bible study on a frequent basis. Cassie Miles, led the Bible study and began to mentor Caily, one other girl from the study and myself throughout the next year. This is what I recognize as the very beginning of my walk with Christ.

     After attending Bible study for a very long time my heart had softened and I began to realize that my life was desolate and was in desperate need of a savior and so I began to make the effort to open my heart to God and allow for that change to occur. As a relatively new Christian who hadn’t quite gotten the hang of walking with Christ, the year to follow was not one that reflected well on me or the God I had begun claiming (if only during Bible study). I found a relatively good group of people to spend time with, they weren’t as interested in partying or getting into trouble as before but they were far from good influences. Continuing to skip out on my classes, lie to my teachers, and my parents my life certainly did not reflect my new found and Christianity and it wouldn’t have been apparent from the outside that Christ was making way for major changes in my heart and in my life.

     That same summer I found myself back at camp but no longer as a camper, this summer I had volunteered as support staff and somewhere between dishes in the kitchen and horse wrangling I discovered the solace of Jesus in my life. I experienced an overwhelming joy and peace that I had never before thought possible, and as if out of nowhere I began to notice changes in my daily life that certainly weren’t of my own accord. I participated in daily prayers and devotionals, I had a desire to worship openly and passionately, and I found a closeness with God that I hadn’t formerly experienced in my life all of this accompanied by regular church attendance did my soul a wonderful amount of good.

     All these things were a result of Christ’s hand in my life and by no means a product of my own works but a camp we talk a lot about “the camp bubble” and “the camp high” which refer to being at camp 24/7 where we’re constantly pushing the Gospel and being home or amongst people and temptations that are otherwise removed while we’re at camp. This worried me; I had become frightened of my return to reality. I was not totally convinced that these changes were real and that when I returned home that I would settle back in to my old routine without any transformation actually having taken place. My prayer for the remainder of that summer what that the God of camp would also be my God at home.

     When the summer had ended and staff had said their goodbyes I did return home, and there was a little bit of a camp high that did eventually wear away but what I discovered when school started back up is that I no longer wanted to take part in the activities I used to. I continued to read my Bible, pray fervently, and attend church. I quickly carved a niche into a church family of my own (most of which were associated with camp) and I continued to allow myself to accept Cassie’s mentorship. This isn’t to say that my Christian walk from there on out was easy, it wasn’t and isn’t. Walking with Jesus is a daily challenge and one of the most difficult things I’ve ever done, but I do it as best as I can and some days are better than others. I stray and still have a tendency to put myself before God but I am continuously working towards bettering myself for the sole purpose of glorifying the name of God. I get a little better all the time and I would advise anyone who reads this blog to immerse yourselves in the grace of Jesus because there is a love that is everlasting and steadfast that will heal the brokenhearted and save those who are spiritually crushed (Psalm 34:18)

introducing blair (hang on, it's a doozy. whoops.)

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Wed, 22 Aug 2012 13:40:00 +0000

     I was baptized when I was five. I believed in Jesus and was just as sincere as any five-year-old can be. As I grew up, I had the perfect conditions for being just a stellar Christian: Awesome Christian parents, a church that I loved, Christian friends, and of course the prayer that I said when I was little. With all these things perfectly in place, I obviously should have been an all-star Christian. In my mind, I was.

     The problem is that my mind had the wrong idea. Like so many Christians (unfortunately), I didn’t read my Bible or study it or pray. I bought into the idea that Christianity was a moral thing: Jesus was meant as a motivational speaker for self-help, and the Bible was a moral rulebook of sorts. It was all about being a good person. The Bible and all its stories were quaint little tales that were allegorical of our lives. In other words, the Bible was about me and how to be a better person. Once I got into youth group, things changed. I then found myself at the opposite extreme, believing that it wasn’t about being moral, but rather about an experience. If you say the sinner’s prayer and you get really emotional, you’re golden. That makes you a Christian! The focus, now, was on belief and emotional experiences. It was all about some hippy-dippy experience that happened inside me. I could know I was saved if I cried at youth retreats and could feel God living in my heart. ……barf.

   I have to make it clear that this mindset didn’t come from my parents or my church. They were there teaching me the right stuff all along, but it never clicked for me. I think this is a blatant example of the sovereignty of God and the fallen state of man. Sometimes I would get a nudging feeling that I wasn’t doing something right. I often lived in fear, doubting my own ability. How good did I have to be to be good enough? How sincere did my beliefs have to be, to be sincere enough? I had emotions sometimes, but what happens when youth camp is over and the emotions fade? Was that sinner’s prayer really enough to secure my place in Heaven? American Christianity made it seem so easy: believe in your heart that Jesus died for you, and then be a good person. Feel it inside you. The whole thing was so much about internal, personal experiences, and then works based on those experiences. So, I’m supposed to base my life on this feeling inside me? Way too subjective for me. After all, no matter how sincere I am in believing something, that doesn’t mean it’s true. The heart is wicked and the mind is deceitful. If we base our truth and beliefs on what happens inside us, all kinds of lunatics will believe all sorts of crazy things. So, no matter how emotional I tried to be, no matter how morally I lived, something was still missing. It was all too easy and too shallow. I had a feeling that this wasn’t right. There had to be more than this, this just wasn’t enough. I wasn’t passionate about this. I desperately searched for something better, but my eyes were blinded.

     So in 2009, when my youth leader told me “Blair, this weekend is going to be life-changing,” I had my doubts. I’d seen everything (I thought) that Christianity had to offer. Nothing impressed me. That weekend we went on a youth retreat. When he started our study on holiness, I turned off my brain as usual. I was a good person, right?

      Wrong-o. As hard as I tried to think about anything and everything else during those Bible studies, something was different this time. I kept being drawn back to what he was teaching. When I started listening, I began to pick up on what the Christian life should look like. Of course, I already knew we should just be good people, but this was something more. He didn’t talk about how empowered we are and all the good things we can do. He didn’t talk about believing really hard and an easy “sinner’s prayer” that saves us. He didn’t even talk about a specific moment when we “accept God.” He did talk about the sovereignty of God and how He makes us alive, through no works of our own. He talked about a God who saves us and makes us Holy. He talked about grace, free and unconditional. He talked about lives being radically changed, and a passion for God that leads men to give their hearts and lives. Then, he put a chair right in front of me and sat down, and read this verse:

Thus says the LORD:“Heaven is my throne, and the earth is my footstool; what is the house that you would build for me, and what is the place of my rest? All these things my hand has made, and so all these things came to be, declares the LORD. But this is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit and trembles at my word. (Isaiah 66:1-2 ESV)

     I don’t know if that does anything for you guys, but for me that was it. If Christianity was true, it didn’t look like I thought it did for all those years. This was something radical, God was some enormous, righteous, majestic God and I was this helpless, finite little creature. I could do nothing.

      During a five-minute bathroom break, I took my youth pastor to the corner and asked him the question that had been on my mind for a long time: “Can you be a Christian and not want to read the Bible?” After a long pause, he answered a slow but sure “I don’t think you can.” Of course, I lost it. I had no desire for reading the Bible, I didn’t even really know what it was about. I knew in that moment that I didn’t pair up to the measure of a Christian in the Bible. Sure, maybe I was moral enough, and maybe I was sincere enough. But in the Bible, a Christian is someone who has been made alive. They don’t do good works because that’s what they feel obligated to do—they live Holy lives because they are in awe of God’s grace and He has given them new desires, and a passion for Himself.

     I’d like to say that we talked for a few minutes and cleared it all up. In reality, the five-minute break turned into an hour or so of me crying and feeling completely hopeless. I didn’t desire God. This pretty much solidified what I had always feared: that I was bound for Hell. Even after an hour, nothing had changed. Rather, I left that weekend with more questions than ever.

     That weekend rocked my world. I finally saw something different about this Christianity thing, and I wanted to know more. I could suddenly see a difference in people like my parents and my youth pastor, and the shallow pseudo-Christianity that is so prominent in America. This was something that made people passionate and humble and joyful—it changed their hearts. I had to know if this was true, and what I needed to do to have what they had.

     I started reading my Bible and praying, just because I didn’t know what else to do. I honestly, at the age of 19, had no clue what the Bible was all about. I didn’t even realize that some of the books were letters, that there were so many different authors, that it was true historically, etc. I always thought it was a bunch of stories and rules. So I began reading the Bible and understanding the big picture. In addition to this, I read and studied the history of the Bible, how it was formed, if it was accurate, etc. I struggled for a while trying to figure out if the Bible was even true, and I poured through sites and articles about the historicity of the Bible. Through all of this, praying was the hardest thing to do. I didn’t know what to pray, so I just prayed that God would make me feel something and give me assurance on how to be a Christian. I prayed that, if Christianity were true, He would prove it to me. Looking back, most of this was spurred on by a fear of Hell. But God would soon show me something that was as infinitely great as Hell is bad.

   Here is where you would probably expect me to tell some big story about how He proved it to me through some miraculous experience. Sorry, I don’t have one of those. But the thing is, I don’t want you to believe in Jesus just because I’ve felt and experienced Him in my life. While I know that I’ve encountered Him personally, Christianity isn’t true just because I feel it inside me. The thing that finally got me was studying and coming to the conclusion that the Bible could be trusted. That was the first step for me, and probably for anyone who thinks objectively as I do. Without a doubt, God WAS working inside me, but to a skeptical, logical (I thought) teenage girl, I refused to trust something happening inside me. I will not deny for a second that God had already opened up my heart—but He allowed it to be open to the truth, and the truth is what saved me. God showed me that truth was truth, despite my emotions and feelings, and then it was up to me to respond to what I knew as true. Then, I was able to trust my emotional experiences, because I had a reason to believe they were true, not the other way around.

     In the end, it isn’t about something that happens in me (emotional) and it isn’t about “What would Jesus do?” (moral). It’s about what Jesus did. If the Bible is true, my salvation is already accomplished for me. American Christianity has taken the Christian life and made it a personal, inward experience. But in the Bible, Christianity was always a corporate, objective truth—it isn’t dependent on whether or not we feel it inside of us. Jesus isn’t alive because I feel Him in my heart, He is alive because He is alive. Salvation is bought and paid for, and you can do nothing emotionally or morally to earn it. If you feel called to Christ, don’t doubt it. Don’t focus on doing good works, but ask God to give you new desires. Don’t focus on emotional experiences, because your heart and your mind will deceive you. If you don’t always start crying at the name of Jesus—it’s okay. We still live in the flesh and it is at war with the Spirit. You will have dry seasons and times that reading the Bible and praying is hard and you simply do not feel like doing it (Isaiah 59:1-2). But, don’t doubt your salvation in these times. Rather, rest in the fact that Christ already accomplished your salvation and that doesn’t change based on your emotions or actions. Read the Bible and pray, even when it’s hard, because you will be drawn back in by seeing God….He’s pretty irresistible.

     Don’t buy into the multitude of lies about Christianity. I had to learn not to look for that one “aha!” moment that I became saved, or the moment I “accepted” Christ. I had to learn not to base the assurance of my salvation on the “sinner’s prayer” or on my emotional experiences. I had to learn that my salvation was accomplished outside of me, a very long time ago, as part of God’s plan established before time began. When God opens your eyes to that and draws you to Himself because of it, that is when you are made alive. When I focus on what is going on inside of me, I’m just confused and empty. When I focus on what Christ did despite my confusion and helplessness, that is what gives me satisfaction and assurance and joy. All along, I was trying to hold on to God. Now I’ve realized, HE is the one holding on to me. I need just relax and enjoy it.

     I had someone tell me the other day that I should probably lighten up on posting about Jesus on my social networking sites. They chalked it up to having been raised in a Southern Baptist home with the Bible under my nose my entire childhood. This isn’t the first time, either. I’ve had many people suggest that I am ignorant or blindly believing what I do because it’s what I was raised in. But what I hope to express through this post is this: I am not a Christian because of my family or surroundings or because it’s what my parents taught me. I am not a Christian who ignores truth and history and evidence and facts. I am a Christian because I believe wholeheartedly that it is true and that God has allowed me to see that. I don’t bend the truth based on my beliefs, I mold my beliefs to the truth.

     As for posting about it? Heck ya. You can bet your bottom dollar I’ll post about it from here on to eternity. My posts aren’t an attempt to make someone change their ways or force my opinions on anyone. But my heart has been completely captivated by a Savior, and I can’t hold it in. While it’s a faulty metaphor, I always compare it to falling in love with a human. When it happens, you can’t get enough of that person and you want to shout it from the rooftops and declare it to the world and you want everyone else to see the beauty you see in that person. Christ has captured my heart and my affections and I simply can’t keep it to myself. That’s why I’m writing this post, that’s why we started this blog, and that’s why I intend to live a life that looks radically different from the world, even if it causes people to think I’m weird/outspoken/annoying/wrong/anything else you can think of. People thought the same stuff about Jesus, so I’ll consider it an honor.

introducing sarah!

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Tue, 21 Aug 2012 06:14:00 +0000

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I grew up in a Christian home where church and Sunday school were a priority every Sunday. I didn’t really like going to church, but went to make my parents happy. Throughout elementary and middle school, my parents stressed the importance of getting good grades and consequently I found my identity in my schoolwork and in getting all A’s. Every night before dinner we would pray together as a family and once a week we would have “family meetings” where we recapped the week, talked about the next week and said the Lord’s Prayer together as a family. Other than that, my parents never really talked to me about faith or helped us understand what it meant to have a relationship with God.

In high school I still strived for good grades and was also very busy with clubs, sports and my social life. I had a lot of friends and was considered one of the “popular kids.” So, with that being said, I wouldn’t say I got mixed up in the “wrong crowd” or anything, we just had no guidance and no one to look up to. {{I wish someone would’ve reached out to me, tell me I had so much going for me and teach me about my worth in Christ}}. My friends and I started drinking freshmen year of high school, sneaking out of the house to go to parties, etc. My sophomore year of high school, I started dating this “stud” football player who was a senior (and at the time seemed to have sooooo much going for him. Ha.) Our relationship progressed and became serious very quickly and I ended up having sex with him. Although at that time, I knew what the Bible said about sex before marriage, I clearly chose to disobey. All of my other friends were having sex with their boyfriends, so I thought I was just doing what was “normal” and “expected.”

Although I was caught in many worldly things, I was still going to youth group and leading a double life. After my sophomore year I went on a weeklong mission trip with my church to the Navajo Indian Reservation in New Mexico. It was there that I learned about reading my Bible and I accepted Christ into my life. Although I said I was going to stop drinking and partying, it didn’t happen and I fell right back into the same sins when I got home. {{I wish I would have had a mentor or youth group leader to disciple me and teach me what it meant to follow Christ}}. Although my behavior didn’t change, I remember feeling a sense of guilt and regret about the way I was living.

The next year, my junior year, Mr. Football “Stud” went off to college, found a new girlfriend and broke my heart. For a while I was really depressed and picked up the habit of binge drinking. In the midst of all this, a friend from youth group invited me to go to YoungLife with her. I went twice and enjoyed it, but wasn’t able to go every week because I was busy for some reason or another. {{I wish I hadn’t been so busy with mixed up priorities and had allowed one of those women to pour into my life}}.

A few months later, while still depressed and trying to mend my broken heart, I met a new boy who was into the party scene and brought me along with him. This only further increased my binge drinking. For about 2 months during that year, I drank at least four nights of the week and ended up having sex with him too. I felt so crappy about myself for doing that that I felt that I needed to date him because that was “the right thing to do.” I continued dating him my senior year, and although we were still caught in sexual sin, I had decided to stop drinking, which lasted for a few months at a time, but then I would just screw up again. Throughout high school, my identity was in getting good grades, sports and mainly boys. Over half of my time was spent with a boyfriend; I didn’t know how to function alone.

Before I left for college, the youth leaders at my church encouraged me to get plugged into a Christian organization on campus and after researching a few on the Penn State website, I decided that I was going to join LSM (Lutheran Student Movement). I checked out an event during the first week of school, made a rash judgment that everyone was nerdy and weird and never went back. Unfortunately, my freshmen year I was still dating the same boy from high school. We didn’t go to the same college, so we decided to do the long distance thing. My first couple weekends at college were spent partying because that’s what the people in my dorm were doing and I desperately wanted to fit in and make friends. I desperately hoped there would be more to college than this because frat parties, cheap beer and drunk people everywhere lost their appeal very quickly.

Around the time I became disenchanted with the party scene, I got a flyer in my mailbox promoting YoungLife leader training. I remembered the YoungLife club I went to in high school and decided to check it out. Everyone was really friendly- and seemed to be normal, although they were Christians (at this point I still thought Christians were all lame, nerdy and weird). I enjoyed this group of people so I started attending new leader training, even though I didn’t actually want to be a YoungLife leader. Throughout training, I acted like I had it all together and knew what people were talking about, although most of the stuff we were learning I had never heard of before because I hadn’t really listened at church. I started doing a lot of research on my own and eventually bought a Bible. I started meeting with an older girl in YoungLife and asking her questions, trying to figure out what I believed. {{Finally, someone who was willing to take the time to sit down with me and talk to me about this following Jesus thing!}}

Winter of my freshmen year, I went to a work weekend with my YoungLife new leader training group. There, I heard the gospel for what was probably about the 8 millionth time in my life, but for some reason, this time it suddenly clicked. The speaker told everyone to go outside and think about what they had just heard and just open their hearts and listen to God. Although I was technically a staff person/ worker, I went outside and just began crying. At that moment, it finally sunk in that Jesus had died on the cross for me, that He loved me and that He was calling me into a relationship with Himself. In that moment, I recommitted my life to him, deciding that I wanted Him to be the Master and Lord of my life and change my life in whatever way He saw fit.

I wish I could say it was all rainbows and butterflies from this point forward. While I had a desire to know God and grow with Him, I was still dating a guy who did not value the importance of a relationship with Jesus. I told my boyfriend that I did not want to have sex with him anymore and although he said that was ok, it really strained our relationship. I also decided to quit drinking completely, also straining our relationship since this was one of our main pastimes together. While I struggled with these things the rest of my freshmen year, the Holy Spirit continued to convict me and point me to Jesus.

That summer, I served on summer staff at a YoungLife camp where I was further stretched in my faith. I was able to spend a lot of time in the Word, read many Christian books (including Don’t Waste Your Life by John Piper) and get to know God better free of worldly distractions. After camp, I broke up with my boyfriend because I knew it was not a Christ-centered relationship and desired to focus on God the rest of the summer.

My sophomore year rolled around and I decided I was going to “do things right” and got involved in Campus Crusade for Christ (Cru) right from the beginning of the year and joined a Bible study. Being involved in this Christian community was so encouraging. The girls in my bible study became my best friends and kept me accountable to the sin in my life. One of my bible study leaders started mentoring me and teaching me what it meant to walk out my faith. Although I still struggled with many things, I learned to trust God and turn my life over to Him completely. I learned that seeking attention from boys would never fully satisfy and that only God can meet my deepest needs.

Throughout college, I grew leaps and bounds in my faith and allowed God to meet me in my brokenness. While I still had (and continue to have!) my struggles, I know my position in Christ. I know that I am His beloved daughter, worthy, loved, forgiven, accepted. My story is full of God pursuing me, which is absolutely beautiful to now look back on. I wish I would have recognized that in those moments and run toward Him, but everything happens in His perfect timing and ultimately He won and has captured my heart. As you can see throughout my story and in those moments when God was working, my heart was crying out for a mentor, a leader, a role model- an older woman to speak life to me and point me in the right direction. I recognize just how important it is to love on, encourage and disciple younger women so that they too can grow into the beautiful women God has created them to be!

Life with Jesus in the past few years has been anything but ordinary. In 2 weeks, I will embark on an 11-month journey, following Him across 5 continents and to 11 nations sharing His love with people all over the world.

what we're all about

noreply@blogger.com (blair nicole) — Tue, 21 Aug 2012 00:24:00 +0000

Hello lovely people! If you are reading this, you are one lucky dog for finding your way to our little corner of the blogosphere. ;)

Okay, that's not true. So far it's just me on here so don't be too excited. Soon, however, there will be some stellar ladies beginning to post here, and i am sure that you and me will both be blessed by what they have to say.

So right now I'm just going to tell you guys a little about why we are here and why we are doing this. My desire in starting this blog, and the purpose we have all agreed on, is threefold:

1) The Bible paints a clear picture of what Christian women should be living like. While we understand that men and women are equal in the sight of God, we also recognize that men and women have unique roles and face different challenges in life. We also believe that, as Christians, we should look different from the women of the world. That being said, we want this to be a place where women can discuss the idea of Biblical Womanhood and what that means for our lives. Along this line, we also want to live out Titus 2:3-5, which is why I have chosen women from all different walks of life, who are at different points in life and facing different struggles and experiences. To sum it all up, this is to be a place of sharing, encouragement, and edification.

2) Another reason I want to do this is because I think there are many issues that need to be discussed and studied and understood better. Weak theology is pretty prevalent in American Christianity today, and has lead to so many false versions of Christianity. I firmly believe that we cannot love God unless we actually know Him, and theology is exactly that (the study of God.) Good theology (through reading and studying Scripture) is important in helping us in so many ways:
-Knowing God better
-Preparing for suffering
-Preparing for temptation
-Preparing for persecution
-Obedience
-Preparing and spurring us to go make disciples
-Forming our worldview
-Teaching/encouraging us to pray
This is definitely not an exhaustive list, but I hope it gives you a glimpse of why good theology is important. In this post John Piper claims that wimpy theology makes wimpy women. We don't want to be wimpy women, we want to be standing strong in and for Christ. So we will discuss theology, even when it is hard or controversial, because it is important.

3) In my experiences, I've had a lot of people who are constantly dogging the internet and saying it is "of the devil" or "a waste of time" or "leads to no good." While maybe these things can be true in some situations, I believe wholeheartedly that everything in creation is meant to bring glory to God, and the internet isn't an exception to this. The internet allows us to do so much that was impossible before: in seconds you can connect to people halfway across the world. You can share knowledge and information, or you can speak to a loved one on the mission field, or doctors can direct a surgery for a dying child halfway across the world. As Christians, we shouldn't be hiding from the internet just because some people abuse it. Rather, I believe we should embrace it and use it for glorifying God and sharing the gospel. So, that is my goal for this blog. We will have contributors from North Carolina, South Carolina, Massachusetts, and Colorado. In fact, Sarah will be going on the World Race and will be able to post while she is traveling to 11 different countries around the world. Amazing, right?! While a blog is not the ideal way or the only way to fellowship with other Christian women (you certainly need to be interacting face-to-face), I believe that it is an incredibly useful tool that God has given us and He intends for us to make the best use of it, so that is what we will try to do.

If you read the above, you should have gathered that all the contributors to this blog are Christian women. I am resolved to being Biblical, and we will all be writing from a Biblical perspective. If you are not a Christian, you are more than welcome to read and comment, and I am totally open to civil discussion. However, I don't intend for this to be a place for arguments, and if you become rude or harass my girls, we will have issues. This is a place of encouragement and discussion. If you disagree with our position as Christians, you are welcome to stick around as long as you are respectful and calmly discussing. While I will respect all different opinions and religions, comments that attack others or don't respect the purpose of this blog are going to be deleted. Just a fair warning. :)

I would also like to point out that every one of us writing recognizes our fallibility and understand that we are all sinners, and all flawed, and all lack understanding. None of us claim to know the Bible inside and out, or to have everything figured out. To Christians reading this blog: If anyone finds something questionable in any of my posts, I would appreciate being told. You can be prepared because I will make mistakes and probably say some stupid, haughty stuff. If that's the case, I beg you to come and tell me, and I will make any necessary changes. I think I am safe in saying that this probably goes for the other ladies as well.

I think that about covers everything. We will begin posting before the end of the month. All of the girls writing for the blog are ladies in whom I have seen a passion for God and a desire to be like Christ. I'm so excited to introduce them to you!!!! Stay tuned. :)