The Mind Canvas

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Sat, 27 Sep 2014 19:31:00 +0000

Thirst

as it goes I sit here idly

fulfilling my end, yet feeling quite empty

Most would say I'm responsible enough

Security intact, knows what to do

I don't understand why I'm so troubled

Comparable sure to the ol average joe

Just making a living with little unknowns

Trying to figure if Im actually complete

or have I resigned to blend with the masses

Once upon a time I thrived to excel

At work, in school, at every thing hell

I know for a fact I've stopped craving life

By that I mean theres no thirst left inside

Why did it leave and where did it go

Will it return and how do I know

It is normal and is this a phase

I really do hope it comes back some day.

Randy Sturridge

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Fri, 26 Sep 2014 10:05:00 +0000

My Little Knobby Knees

A day like any other, a day ill never forget

You are buckled in, little knobby knees

Elmo on your left and a window to your right

I see you, I know you, I love you

Those big brown eyes find me, standing in the lot

My heart is beating, my thoughts all over

You are buckled in, with your toys packed away

A day like any other, A day I feared would come

You are my girl, my happiness and my smile

You are buckled in and hands wave good bye

Hugs to some, words for others, but you…

I tell you I see you later, and time to go on ride

I know you don’t understand, I am here right now

I give you kisses and also elmo, touch your hair and face

I back on down and wave to you…Hi, do you see

I hear the Uhail roar to life, My eyes are watching you

I crane my neck and move about…hi burger

Soon your face is out of view, you are moving on

I watch the truck until its gone, with you buckled in

My heart and soul cry in silence, tears the only clue

My niece, my treasure, my little Ari Ann

Please remember me…however long it takes

I will be at the door one day, to see that sunshine face

Please burger.., I wish I could explain

I would never leave lone, never in this life

My God this hurts so bad inside…

Remember my face and the love we shared

29 months and 5 days. You were the spark that brought me back

Stay close to mommy and daddy on your adventure all brand new

Don’t forget Uncle Randy, My face and love for you

I swear to you baby girl, I’ll be there your whole life

You will open the front door and see me seeing you.

I love you Ari-Ann Carmean with everything that I am. I am so, so sorry that we will not be able to play “ready, Ready,” “Up-Down” “Elephant,” “Hide and Seek,” and so many more...No more Yo Gabba Gabba, and feeding elmo for a while. Just keep me fresh in that little head. I will skype you whenever I can. I will come visit as soon as humanly possible. I love you little girl. You’re a cool dude, and very funny funny.

I love you.

Randy

When Right and Left Intertwine

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 18:25:00 +0000

Along the road there comes a time

When right and left intertwine

All the people in their cars

Faceless stares blank as dolls

Routine takes hold of lives

Auto pilot, coast on by

Chances lost doors are closed

Risk averted as time goes

Along this road a time will come

When all the people see their numb

Thoughts of life will flood their minds

Hopefully they shall find

That when right and left intertwine

Risk and chance is so divine

Be the one who lives for life

Not afraid to roll the dice

Happiness is said to be

Man's best chance at being free

So when the time comes on by

Take some chances and you shall fly.

Randy Sturridge

For All Time

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 26 Dec 2011 15:43:00 +0000

Unlike any other

A night for all time

Cherished in memory

Reliving every second

Over...again and again

Unequivocal romance

electric passions

rekindled every day

A memory for all time

Remembering your grace

sensational presence

Mesmerizing gaze

Lives forever in me

Unlike any other

A night for all time

Alive inside of me

Revisited over and again

Your love will never die.

Change Sometimes

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 06:34:00 +0000

THE CLOCK TICS ON AS DAY COMES TO AN END

AWAKE THE NEXT DAY TO DO IT ALL AGAIN

CHANGE IS COMING IT COURSES THROUGH MY MIND

LEAVING TRACES OF PROMISE OR MINE OWN DEMISE

WHAT ITLL BE, CAN I CONTROL THE OUTCOME

IS IT WORTH ATTEMPTING TO OVERCOME

THE CURRENT STATE OF LIVING FOR NOTHING

DANGEROUSLY FOSTERS A HOPE FOR SOMETHING

IT HAS TO COME, A CHANGE, A GREAT SHIFT

TO SECURE MORE YEARS, HOPING IT’S BLISS

WHAT IS THIS CHANGE THAT I FEEL

SWELLING IN MY BODY THROUGHOUT THE LAST YEAR

TEMPTATION IS FLEETING AS IS THE HOPE

THAT THE OUTCOME FAVORS A NEGATIVE SCOPE

A PARTNER, A FRIEND, ONE OF GOOD MERIT

I FEAR IS THE ONLY VARIABLE TO HELP THIS

LET IT BE A DAY THAT I’LL REMEMBER

EITHER I’LL TRANSEND THIS CURRENT USELESS ENDEVEOR

OR ILL SUCCUMB TO MY GROWING ACCEPTANCE ITS OVER

A PRODUCT OF ALLOWING INFLUENCE TO GROW COLDER

MAYBE ILL BE SAVED TO LIVE AND LOVE ANOTHER DAY

OR MAYBE ILL GIVE UP AND END THIS LIFE OF IDLE PLAY

ONE OR THE OTHER, I CARE NOT WHICH ONE

AS LONG AS THE CURRENT STATE LIVING IS DONE

RANDY STURRIDGE

Precious Commodities

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 16:31:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Magnificent lights erupt lighting night sky

The crowd responds with hackles and jeers

A fifteen minute segment every year on this day

Townspeople and young folk cheer and carry on

Innocence envelopes their frail souls keeping out dangers

Parents with fortified presence steer others from a perimeter

Little tyke and his buddies are being watched closely

Daddy catches a glimpse of the works here and there

But he knows that the precious commodities are the reason he is there

Year after year the cheers and the festivals taunt an on-looker

He chooses not to watch the light show but instead watch the tykes Father

This Daddy will never experience the torment of being too fire sky drawn

To learn the cold hard truth that the world can steal more than thought possible

The onlooker watches the finale as tears flow from his yellow somber eyes

This onlooker never got a second chance to make it right a second time

The little tyke's Daddy picks him up, a quick spin, and turns to leave

The onlooker brings the bottle from his mouth and catches the eyes of the Father

A nod from one and tears from another, remembering losing a daughter and her brother

The Father passes without a word, as the onlooker swiftly opens his mouth inserts the gun and pulls the trigger

No more dreams or second chances, all it takes is ten seconds to destroy three lives

Randy Sturridge

The Merit of Man

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 08:17:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Once upon a time we all walked the lands

searching with hope to one day understand

The purposeful presence that bring about questions

Leading intellectuals to philosophize suggestions

Trial and error contract the scopes of limits

producing bi-products of various new secrets and sentiments

Generations anew stretch further their reach

hypothesizing theories with a testament in each

Time doth pass as do great thinkers

Leaving in their wake students and preachers

Reeling within the the absolute unknowns

allowing those forthcoming to secure similar tones

A history is built by the merit of man

Extending his passions to wake settled lands

We are a people of magnificient essence

Both in shape, stature, mentality and reference

With each procession in lineage and line

We approach with courage in answering the unknown

Take time to appreciate your dear fellow man

For without man's good nature this world is damned.

Randy Sturridge

Men of Magnitude

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 18:48:00 +0000

Marvel ideas with novel contributions

Well thought to be less like retribution

Factoring constructs all range considered

Fashioned, unequivocal, and then so settled

Consider new heights still undiscovered

Remember lost memories of forgotten brothers

Honest investment in men of magnitude

Allowing disruption of conveyance that convolutes

Hearing long cries of a different tune

Not of sad souls but of happiness renewed

Hands join arms and we all stand as one

Representing forgotten voices of past loved songs

Let us be the men we once were

On top of high mountains we are reborn.

Randy Sturridge

Love Regardless

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Thu, 10 Nov 2011 08:05:00 +0000

A perpetuating irritation that holds only dead ends

uncontrollable emotions surmount

The strength to exhibit self omni - paramount

The bi-product of such misguided love

Anger that fickels and boils beyond

strength of the worth of remembering the cause

Love misguided with heavy stress and great fear

The fear that i am not the man you reverred

I tell you once, now and forever

I love your nature that you love most

The feeling of being free from fall hopes

We are two loves that gravely love each other

yet fight and explode for our care for another

communication eludes the reason

The could have preserved the thought and the care

We must fix this vessel that tears at our sails.

Randy Sturridge

Set Wave Seven

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 23:30:00 +0000

Sweet, sensational force

Headwind stinging skin

Swell by swell a set on high

Seven counts and she builds the horizon

Wait! I stop paddling and erect myself

Vision peaks over number six

It’s all wrong but she is massive

A lion among wolves, I hear her

Fleeting and curious she takes new aim

I gaze north and scan south, plenty of room

The face is mine but I must hurry

She is a steam engine, her force dangerously inviting

Thirty yards north she, number seven, comes with tide wind

As I begin to lay upon my vessel, I feel the shift

Onshore winds subside, abrupt

The whole ocean is churning with this new change

Offshore winds to welcome my wonderful giant

Number six flies past leaving white stallions

Sea Mist coats my bare flesh and I’m off

Dig, dig, get it deep and pull, I am lion

I will meet my friendly foe on her wayward course

Pump, pull, stop!

I angle forward and feel myself become weightless

I have made it, and now we dance

I am a feather and I want the wind

I deserve this seven

I pull myself up in the free fall

12 foot face of ocean, clear, emotional

I lean in and she folds over me

But right, ducked low I touch her

I feel her smooth, terrible strength

And for seconds, in her barrel

The lion, The feather, The stallions and the Great Beauty that is number is mine and I am hers.

Randy Sturridge

Boardwalk

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 18:08:00 +0000

Broken wings under cold boardwalk

Terrible pain fills the night

A homeless vagrant observes death

Terrible waves rattle the structure

Birds of sunshine take eternal rest

Leaving boardwalk graves and restless wanderers

Fear encumbers and consumes frail things

Fate takes hold as old boardwalk rocks

A vagrant clutches with icy cold hands

Bones of sunshine wash by his frame

Woeful cries cut through the crashing

A homeless wanderer takes eternal rest

Old boardwalk rocks with icy sea air.

Randy Sturridge

Love for a Pretty Girl

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 04:08:00 +0000

A queen, a gem, a rare artifact I possess

Savored, worshipped, for purposes unsaid

Protect sacred thoughts just in case

Should it arrive, the moment I’m erased?

Never quite losing but I find myself floored

With thoughts and fears of hearing closed doors

The light I have burns bright and thick

Forever, when some go, this light loses wick

Ripe pain of loss still fuels my flame

Lighter it burns, when I scream out your name

I must be hopeful that my flame is enough

That can give you back the love that you’ve snuffed

If my flame and fire burns while I search

Know that I loved every day on this earth

Randy Sturridge

Voices of Love

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 23:45:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Beautiful something my hand’s dare hold

So fragile, yet powerful, warm yet cold

Beautiful something bring life unto me

Satisfying, justifying, my nerves set free

Grown into me, become my purpose

Giving reason for living with emotions surfaced

Beautiful angel from my life to you

I trust wholeheartedly you know what to do

Angel I love, my life I would give

To lift any burden so that you could live

Love, my dear, my sweet chocolate bunny

It would tear me apart, if you start running

I fathom only the bottomless thoughts

That leave me empty with loss I fought

Into old age I pictured myself

Only with you and our picture shelf

Retire to our quaint little house by the sea

Set in my memory just for you and for me.

Randy Sturridge

Trapped Awake

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Sat, 08 Oct 2011 16:15:00 +0000

Know what it’s like to be trapped awake?

For days on end, hallucinate.

An immense strain upon the body

No falling asleep instead passing out

So damned exhausted one can’t count

Thoughts so jumbled as one mumbles

Can’t make sense of one’s own mind

Speaking to oneself, in search of a sign

Paranoid by now, covering all tracks

Forgetting by this time that sleep one so lacks

Why won’t the mind give one a break?

Why can’t one just sleep for god sakes?

Hating this phase that’s part of the maze

Putting one’s mind in a dangerous craze

Beginning to unlearn the structure of words

Losing the grip for all that one’s learned

Trying to sleep have to keep moving

Don’t fully know just picking and choosing

Anger and rage knowing ones missed

Whatever it was, it left with a whisp

Entertain justification of ones own mind

Accepting sleep is not needed to be fine

As soon as one’s ready to accept this fate

The body collapses under force of ones weight

Awake in few hours, of maybe days later

The game has restarted at the hands of the maker

Four days on end sleep changes perspective

Whole life now altered, thoughts are selective

Resigned to accept that ones destined to be

An advocate for lessons of life’s sweet mysteries

One is only a mere mortal of men

Not strong enough to do it all again

Fate so happened to intervene

Replacing the disorder confusion unseen

A man whose mind just couldn’t sustain

The unseen burden that drove him insane

A shell remains that rocks back and forth

His mind has retreated from perpetual discord

Randy Sturridge

Beautiful Monster

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Fri, 07 Oct 2011 22:43:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Reaching and stretching, harder I try.

Slowly, but surely,the farther I slide.

Chainsaws and bullets, I want you to die.

Beautiful monster that lives inside.

Happy you make me, such a beautiful peak.

Though never the permanent state that I seek.

Upward you take me, an invincible high.

Beautiful monster, dare me to die...

Grenades and razors, and diesel fire.

Beautiful monster, I slowly expire.

Downward spiral, you take me to hell.

Solitary confinement, no walls to this cell.

There is no air, it is eternally dark.

Beautiful monster, you devour my heart.

Arsenic and water, do not let us drown.

Beautiful monster, dare I hand you my crown?

You have invaded my dreams, and tainted desires.

Beautiful monster, you start to inspire.

Numb I become, you consume everything.

Beautiful monster, I bow to my King.

Heidi Chester

Those Who Mumble

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Fri, 07 Oct 2011 18:47:00 +0000

Edited by: Randy Sturridge

On days of respite we should so praise

The wrong decisions that are continually made

Why the conflict in positive grants

When so many kindred characters lose their stance

Times of strife bring about life

Preparing the gauntlet to restructure time

A catalyst of grandiose unwavering wicked

Shall emerge when all of us are weakened and pitted

We shall disturb the calm surface water

Boiling the bigoted blasphemous scholars

White collar creases and rolled up sleeves

Implores a preponderance of misguided deeds

Elements of character emerge through great plights

Securing the future and giving back rights

Help the kind elderly man as he crumbles

Notice the righteous who watch and then mumble

A derelict space with auras of disdain

Can only survive when we're playing their game

Get lost not in planning futures so soon

When we've yet to this live this afternoon

Terrible wakes from built luxury spreads

Leaving behind the unworthy without bread

A cause, a motive, just a listen good sir

We shall live today...understood

Planning a forecast is always good measure

Though living today for tomorrow, much better

Take heed at this gesture in honor conveyed

Take it slow, day by day, future in past, unplanned, but okay.

Randy Sturridge

99 Degrees

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Thu, 06 Oct 2011 20:17:00 +0000

Delirium Sets in consider it sin

Thirty minutes time and Ill be swimming again

Drivin with white knuckles

Cigarette Smoke Constant

Mr are you okay

Thanks for asking but no not today

Pissed off Putt me on a cross

Crucify this mind

With blood and sweat I resign

Hope out of reach

Stay Positive they teach

Impossible gestures

When my body aches and then festers

99 degrees how about a little reprieve please

To much to handle lifes little scandals

Randy Sturridge

For One Another

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Thu, 06 Oct 2011 19:13:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

A gift from one to another

Is not but everything that encourages others

The focus of life on distant shores subsides

Absolutes give way as molecules collide

Carry the burden of foreign references

Absolve inside out characters with all their differences

Accept all who compare the lost soldiers

Thought provoking, holding peculiar forces

Implore the universe to respond in chorus

Lift the band of restraining perspectives

Encourage all to implement directives

The bareness of many lands in hidden discourse

Re-align as fate drives emotions to the floor

Pick up the path that we have so strayed

Everybody lives as one grand leader for one another

Randy Sturridge

Pretty Pretty Pretty Pretty

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Thu, 06 Oct 2011 02:33:00 +0000

love .
it's the one thing that differentiates our species among the rest.

we grow up knowing that one day we will love.

everyone wants love and to be loved.

it's the one thing every single human on the face of the earth,of all mankind’s history,its what they all longed for at least once in their life.

& I’m sick of it.

I’m not looking for love anymore.

I’m looking for someone
who’s not looking for love in the least.

& if that’s you then I’m looking for you
&when i find you,

we're probably gonna get what’s coming to us;

which is inevitably & ironically:
love.

-a martian .

Lovers

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 19:08:00 +0000

Whispering winds dance delightfully this eve

Setting the mood for two lovers to give

Carnal desires propelled in unison

Hesitation defeated as passions burn bright

Resistance futile as bodies intertwine

Exploring new corners and secret places

Soft touch, then rough, just enough

Arched for pleasure, leverage finds treasure

Slow, so firm, hard pressed as one

Thick air, heavy breathe, sweat

Sweet release, conquered, subsiding seas

Gazing into one another

Two lovers, lay back and watch the stars.

Randy sturridge

id.

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 02:57:00 +0000

Art by: Dickie Gonzo

my disillusioned will to live

is challenged by my medicine

i chose to take i fought to get

i've gotta have, refuse to quit

dyslexic minds all read me wrong

my masked emotions are prolonged

i see my future dark and bleak, i close my eyes

and pray for sleep

where dreams are scars that i can't keep

where visions die and dreams are caught

by the wealthy hands of a greedy lot

who need no more and take no less

to my disease they won't confess

i live for night, for lucid slumber

when i'm free from fear

and life's disorder

dickie gonzo

Phantom Memories

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 01:39:00 +0000

Written By: Lila Star

So it’s never official

It’s never really there

Once the mind moved

Once I let it all go

It’s not the same

Indifference Isn’t a state of mind

Cannot be helped

Cannot Be Fixed

Just overlooked

And a new way of life ensues

Until you truly understand me

Those memories that I love

Are only a phantom of us

Hold onto my ghost

My time stunted soul is yours.

Enjoy More Writing from Lila Star at:

Delirium

Everything Colorless

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 17:00:00 +0000

Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Clones of shattered youth are born

Evacuated shells of previous generations

Emotionless days and vacant dinner tables

Hard tiled floors of a cultureless nation

Perpetuating activism fighting for others

Bi-products of war and deaths of mothers

Speeches of yesterday drown out the skies

Propelling future hopes of past mentioned times

Everything colorless with senses so plain

Society forgotten with faith in nation deranged

Clones built on promises of better days

Slowly accepting all these shades of grey

Randy Sturridge

Toys Asunder

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 22:48:00 +0000

Drawn and Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Rapid descent unmasking tyrants

Boys of darkness cackle irrelevance

Pin cushions, broken dolls erase

Child play, on sunny fun filled days

Shadows deep with purple thick heat

Strengthening evil as all the good recedes

Cloaked in corners, drones of dirt

Mismanaged jigsaw, cork torn skirts

Thunder claps lightning, spider lit sky

Shrieking pointed ringing, heaven and hell collide

Swirl of grandiose masterful plans

Holding so close dangling mortals in hand

Psycho lured dwelling that emboss the weak

Raise them by flesh to rip apart and cleave

Randy Sturridge

Electric Memories

noreply@blogger.com (TheLargeYard) — Wed, 28 Sep 2011 17:55:00 +0000

Edited by: Randy Sturridge

Remembering new heights that brightened all colors

Confused the senses and blotted out others

Remembering sensations that drove peculiar decisions

Feeling of euphoria that stained aching to flesh

The first Unveiling of Loves deep conviction

Remains fresh in the mind, ripe for the picking

Remember trying to convey how it felt

Fear, Excitement, winds from the heavens

Explosions, delirium that no-one could see

Just hearing her name stopped time where it stood

Knowing that Love had permeated the soul

Twenty horses couldn’t slow Loves fermenting strength

Bursting Unsure with conflicted annoyance

Love enthralled, consumed all the senses

Reeking of beautiful warm renditions

Electric memories of Loves sweet conviction

Stays locked in this heart ripe for the picking

Embracing new heights that brightened all colors

Uniting in brief seconds one soul to another

Randy Sturridge