Moose On The Loose

Happy Birthday and Mother's Day

2013-05-10T10:30:00.001+02:00

We are going for a 10-days trip tomorrow! Yeehoo!! I'm excited and nervous at the same time. Excited because we're going on a cruise trip for 7 days which starts in Rome and going all the way to Sicily (Italy), Greece and Turkey. I'm nervous because Aqil has (finally) started eating and I don't know how I should do it because he has only started on solid for a week and I'm still a newbie when it comes to baby food. But all I know I don't trust instant/jar baby food because I read citric acid is even added to an organic baby food and as far as I know citric acid is a PRESERVATIVE. Call me an extremist but no way I'm putting that into his body this early. Maybe in the future if it's unavoidable but for now, it's a no.

Hence me buying a second hand Beaba babycook and lugging it on board just to make sure his gut is free of preservatives (as for now) and be filled with his mama's nutritious self-prepared puree. I'm very cautious about what goes into his stomach as he has infantile eczema. Sadly he got it from his momma, yo. Though his condition is very very very mild (his dry patches cleared in a week with Moogoo) but I don't wanna chance anything. Better be safe than sorry.

But because of the Beaba, we might have an excess baggage! *cries*

My birthday is coming up this weekend (nak jugak bagitau. HAHA). I've been hinting H with my wishlist i.e. handbags (as a typical woman, what else?) but by the looks of it, he's ignoring it. Damn. According to him, he already bought me a Storksak when we were in London, which can be counted as a handbag slash diaper bag. Oh well, worse come to worst, I'll consider the cruise trip as my birthday (and Mother's day) gift. Ngeh ngeh.

But I will definitely buy something for myself. Something valuable and has significant meaning like gold, for example.

Gold.

Old.

T______________T

To all mothers out there, here's a video on mothers from a child's perspective. Kinda bring me to tears. I have a mother's heart now, I'm allowed to be sappy. Haha.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Deutschland Revisited

2013-04-09T16:45:00.002+02:00

I was organizing the harddisk when I stumbled upon these photos. It's the usual thing that I do whenever I have free time, you know - rearranging stuff. I can't stand when things are not in order and like the Germans, I love my stuff to be in order - alles muss in Ordnung sein. I am denial that I (might) show signs of OCD but believe me, these little things keep me together and sane.

They are mostly pictures taken during our trip back to Germany in mid June 2012. As per mentioned in my previous post, we were there to visit a family friend. It was my first time meeting his family but they treat us indifferently. We were treated with nothing but only warmth and kindness.

It felt good to be back in Germany after I left it in 2008. It truly felt like coming home.

That's his old hostel

Proud products of HS Aalen

I was 20 weeks pregnant

I can safely cross out strawberries picking from my wishlist

Fat and juicy strawberries

Our kind host who treats us like part of their family. We're brothers and sisters in Islam, he said. Masya Allah.

Family photo

And yerp, the cat is ALSO part of the family.

Funny Friday #2

2013-04-05T09:36:00.001+02:00

Mom and Dad were visiting us last week. This was their first trip out of the country (not counting Singapore and Thailand) so naturally they were ecstatic about their experience.

They flew via Thai Airways and on board from KUL-BKK, Mom was seated in front of Lisa Surihani.

Yes, you hear me, Lisa Surihani the actress.

"Masa dalam flight, bantal Mama jatuh. Lisa siap tolong amikkan"

*eyes rolling*

"Lisa was on phone until we were about to take off. Sampai stewardess suruh off phone. Call Yusry la tu"

More eyes rolling. I bet she listened to the whole conversation.

Then she went on telling us about some passengers trying to get Lisa's autograph and photos when they landed in Bangkok.

"Dalam bas nak ke terminal, banyak orang ambik gambar dengan Lisa. Mama saje buat taktau lepas tu tanya sorang budak ni - sape tu (sambil tunjuk Lisa)"

The fellow then answered her,

"Makcik tak kenal ke? Tu la Lisa Surihani, pelakon Malaysia. Famous tu makcik"

Know what my dearest mom replied?

"Sorry la kalau pelakon Malaysia ni makcik tak berapa kenal. Kalau pelakon Korea, makcik kenal"

-_________-"

Mama oh mama!

Our (humble) journey, thus far

2013-04-01T22:31:00.000+02:00

(a long entry waiting ahead)

Bismilllahirrahmanirrahim..

Dah lama nak tulis pasal breastfeeding journey tapi segan nak tulis awal-awal nanti orang cakap, poyo ah kau Moose baru beberapa bulan dah sibuk nak tulis breastfeeding journey bagai. So since I've hit the crucial breastfeeding milestone of 6 months, only now I feel comfortable to write my or rather our humble journey down.

During the seconds when Aqil was born, I was so eager to breastfeed him there and then but unfortunately he had some problems with breathing and was taken to the NICU and I only got to hold him for about 10 minutes. Later that night, we visited him and I still couldn't breastfeed him then because he was on breathing machine and a feeding tube was inserted into his mouth. He was fed with donors milk that night after we signed our consent. The next morning, a midwife came to check on me and taught me how to hand-expressed the milk (marmet). Alhamdulillah, the milk was there and despite a bit clumsy, I managed to hand-expressed about 10ml of the "liquid gold" or colostrum for him. That was his first taste of my milk. His breathing equipment was only taken off on the third day so from day 1, there was no direct feeding. I've tried breastfeeding him on day 4 and because my boobs were engorged, he couldn't latch onto it properly.

To cut the (sad) story short, since he was on feeding tube from day 1, he couldn't latch or rather he didn't know how to latch. Furthermore, he was fed with almost 40-55ml (1.5-2 oz) every 3 hours to maintain his weight and that, leaved him with no room to feel hungry and wanting to "work" for food. I felt very devastated and helpless with the whole situation. Seeing that I struggled to have Aqil latched, a nurse suggested me to use a nipple shield and it worked like magic. He could finally latch on!

Since breastfeeding especially the act of sucking takes a lot of preemie's energy and because of that, our breastfeeding session was kept to a maximum of 30 minutes. The rest, he was fed via tube with the milk that I pumped out. To be honest, when he was at the hospital, because of the amount that was assigned for him, there were times when I couldn't meet up his demand. Remember that we signed the consent letter for donor's milk? I innocently thought that even if I couldn't meet his demand, he will still be on breast milk from the donors. I was shocked when I found out that he was already fed with formula milk after he was moved from the intensive care room to the intermediate care room. Don't get me wrong, there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula milk but it was more like a regret towards the hospital of not informing us of the act.

Since that day, something inside of me snapped. I felt like I failed to provide the best for my baby. I've become borderline obsessed with pumping that I pumped every 2-3 hours instead of 3-4 hours. I'd wake up in the middle of the night to do power pumping. I also tried out every possible milk boosters just for the sake if they could increase the milk production. Dates, red dates & longan tea, nursing tea, milk, cheese, white radish - you name it, I've tried it. Orang cakap usaha itu datang dari pelbagai cara and I was doing every thing that I possibly can. It was draining out my energy but I ignored it because I was partly blaming myself that earlier on I chose to sleep rather than pumping out and my son had to take the consequences and had to drink FM. I didn't mean to offend anyone because this was more of my inner battle coupled with frustration, anger and postpartum hormone imbalance back then.

Breastfriend at the hospital

When he was discharged from the hospital, he was still on the feeding tube and we opted for a home hospital care whereby the nurses will visit and monitor his progress for 2 weeks. I was still pumping and breastfeeding him using the nipple shield. After 2 weeks the tube was taken out and I was finally feeding him directly with the help of the nipple shield. Again alhamdulillah, despite reading the disadvantages of using nipple shield and what it can do to your milk supply, I've never experienced any dropping or shortage of supply. Probably because I don't pump so much (so I didn't know the volume) and just concentrate on direct feeding since I'm a SAHM.

Breastfriend at home

So, when he was about 3 months old, I've decided that probably it was time to wean him off from the shields. There is nothing wrong using the shields but it can be quite a hassle when you're out and NIP. The first few days were frustrating and yes, there were times when I felt like giving up, broke down, stressed out and cry but luckily I didn't. I am just too stubborn to quit. One of the things that you should know about me is that, I must finish what I've started. Winners never quit, I always say to myself.

Then one day, he taken me by surprised by latching on perfectly! I was (and still am) a proud mama. From then on, he latched like a pro and I've never been any prouder and grateful. And we enjoy our breastfeeding journey even more from then on. Even though we've hit 6 months, since he was born prematurely, his adjusted age is only 5 months so technically I still have another month to go before I started to introduce solid food to him. But honestly, I don't feel any pressure to do so. I'm just not ready to introduce solid to him but of course, we'll see how it goes later.

Breastfeeding is a natural process but for some people it may take a lot of work. Our breastfeeding journey was/is a roller coaster of emotions. It takes a lot of perseverance, determination, courage, discipline, patience and doa to come to where we are now. This is such a humbling experience to me and in a way it teaches me that sometimes, you gotta have faith in yourself and your baby as both of you are in it - together as a team. (dah bunyi macam tagline MLM pun ada gak. Kahkah)

Alhamdulillah, we've come so far and like every one else, I'd hope to continue this journey for another 1.5 years.

Yeah, boys (and breastfeeding) rule!

Insya Allah.

Til then, happy breastfeeding!

Kuasa Cucu

2013-03-21T09:58:00.000+01:00

When I gave birth unexpectedly in September, my mom wanted to come here together with MIL and SIL but due to her own reasons, she never did make it. This time around, after countless times Skype-ing with Aqil, she's determine to come and is tagging my father along.

They're arriving on this coming Sunday.

I mean, how can you not come when you see this face?

PDA - public display of adorableness

Oh God, I AM becoming those moms who constantly upload their kid(s) photos on any thinkable social media. Shoot me now.

Mom and Dad get to meet their grandson. And I get to meet this,

Hello KFC, it's been a while!

p/s: Dengar cerita KFC's mashed potato konon dibuat dengan tahi minyak ayam? Jangan tabur fitnah Cik Salmah. Baca entry Huda ni dulu.

Bugaboo Bee

2013-03-06T11:40:00.000+01:00

We are still in Oslo, in case you're wondering about the lack of updates. Because our visas (Aqil & I) are delayed, we didn't go back to Malaysia last month as we planned. We don't know how long we're going to stay here though but technically H's (training) contract is going to end in April but he has been (verbally) asked to stay til September. Problem is, his contract hasn't been renewed so we're pretty much left hanging.

Since there might be a possibility returning home sooner than we thought, H and I decided to sell our Brio pram. We loved it and it has been nothing but wonderful (esp. on snow) to use but let's face it, it's not exactly the kind of pram what would fit into a small sized cars we own back home. So with mixed feelings and heavy heart, he advertised it on Finn.no, a Norwegian trading website similar to Mudah.my.

We thought that it would take some time for us to get a buyer but a day later, 2 potential buyers were interested and wanna see it right away! We were quite surprised when a buyer wanted to buy it right away. We didn't even buy a replacement stroller yet! After negotiating, the buyer agreed to hold the purchase until the weekend.

We've been eyeing for few strollers for quite some time and one that struck the most to us is the ever stylish Bugaboo Bee. H likes it so much that he cannot stop thinking about it since he first saw it. Hehe. This time around, we want a stroller that:

lightweight and compact when fold
the seat can face forward and back (the main criteria that I look for!)
fully reclinable
easy to maneuver

Bugaboo Bee has all that except the seat cannot be 180 degree reclinable. Another cons is that, the wheels are small and it can be quite a hassle in (thick) snow but it's now March and most of the snow (in Oslo) is melting by now and we're living in a city so snow isn't as thick as it is in outskirt areas.

We were in awe with Bugaboo Bee Neon limited edition with its black frame, neon green wheels and navy blue canvas with neon green trimming but the price is JUST SO RIDICULOUS! We're cheapo so we stick to the normal edition.

So we tested and paid. And before we know it, ta-da ada budak kecik dah rasmi. Kehkeh.

And the verdict? As much as I miss the Brio (the large storage compartment actually) when it comes to handling, nothing beats this one. It's super easy to steer (I've been to off-road walks with my friends from moms group and trust me, it handles rough terrain quite well), small in size and lightweight. It might not be as sturdy as Brio but that mainly due to its small size. We were in a bus one day and it can swerve to one side if the bus driver is driving roughly but that's small issue because you're not supposed to leave the stroller and your baby unattended anyway.

Out of 5 stars, I'd give this stroller a 4.5. Half because the storage compartment isn't big and you have to access it from front.

Susah nak sumbat barang shopping, tau?

Funny Friday #1

2013-02-22T19:27:00.003+01:00

We went out for our usual weekend outing and stopped waiting for the traffic light turning green before crossing the road. While walking, I was complaining to H that the snow on the side walks weren't properly shoveled and de-iced (if there is such word) that being the usual clumsy me, I almost slipped and fell off.

"Hish, diorang ni tak letak garam ke kat pediatrician walk ni. Boleh kena saman ni. I almost jatuh tadi, you know"

H laughed out loud for a while before returning to his usual grammar-nazi self and replied;

"It's pedestarian walk sayang, not pediatrician walk"

To my defense, I blamed the weather. My tongue was numb from the cold.

Body Talk

2013-02-15T10:45:00.004+01:00

So yesterday was Valentine's Day. Not that we were celebrating it or anything but 3 years ago, we were engaged on the day and suddenly I was feeling nostalgic when looking back at all our engagement photos and reminiscing the good time (and how skinny I was back then!). I think I weighed about 50+ kg kot masa tu. I just joined the gym and man, I was loving my body. Not bonny skinny but toned skinny.

Now sure if you get the drift but for short, my body was hot la. HAHAHA. Perasan.

Don't hate me. Peace no war. HAHA

Yes, it WAS. Now I feel like a blob. Sad.

I still look skinny and I already got my pre-pregnancy weight back but really, for someone who just gained 6-7 kg during the pregnancy, it wasn't that hard. I lost all the pregnancy weight 1 month into confinement and I wasn't doing anything particular. I eat like nobody's business and hungry all the time because I'm breastfeeding. I even jokingly told my husband that I eat more now than when I was pregnant. It's the truth, really. No kidding there. Breastfeeding moms can attest to this.

I would love to start exercising again to tone the body but it's winter (alasan!) so I can't jog. Besides, Aqil is fully on the breasts so I can't leave him with anyone since we don't bottle-trained him because of personal reasons (will blog more about this but I don't know when). The only exercise that I'm doing is walking and if you live without your own transportation, you are bound to do it, a lot. And it's free, so yay!

Hopefully once the weather is a bit warmer, we or I can go to parks for a walk. It's nicer to go to parks when it's not freezing cold and the ground is not laced with snow and ice. And I don't have to frantically look for cafe/deli/restaurant if Aqil suddenly wakes up for milk because I can nurse him there and then. Oslo is practically a breastfeeding friendly place so you won't get stared at if you are NiP. So, another yay!

Tell me - how do you mommies, lose the pregnancy weight?

Sex Symbol

2013-02-04T09:00:00.000+01:00

(source)

As per the hospital's regulations, after I delivered I had to stay at the postpartum ward for 3 days. On the second day postpartum, a middle age midwife came to me for the usual routine check up i.e. taking blood pressure, check the uterus etc. I commented on how engorged my breasts were and since Aqil was in NICU and hand-expressing technique didn't work well with me, I requested for a breast pump.

She then said, "You must've felt like Dolly Parton with those engorged boobs"

I laughed hard and she lent me an Ameda hospital grade pump and then happily showed me how it works.

She also shared her breastfeeding tips based on her successful experience. All her 3 children were breastfed. I still remember one of the things that she said to me;

"From now on, your boobs are no longer a sex symbol. They're now food for your baby"

And yerp, that's how I think Aqil sees me now - a source of food and comfort.

Wordless Wednesday #25

2013-01-23T13:15:00.001+01:00

Too Much To Do, Too Little Time

2013-01-22T18:53:00.000+01:00

Last week H got home and broke the news that his training contract will not be extended and we have to go back in April. It was like dropping an atomic bomb and I was silent for a while. I mean, I know that we'll be back for good soon but soon is not in April. Soon in my mind is at least at the end of 2013 or at least half a year more.

But soon is approaching us sooner than we thought.

Then it got me thinking that I haven't explore Norway enough. We've never been outside Oslo except for the weekend retreat in April last year. Other than that, nada. We haven't seen aurora borealis and never been to Bergen. They say when you're visiting Norway, there are things that you MUST do and those two are on the list.

Putting Norway aside, I still haven't had enough of Europe. There are European countries that I haven't visited. Denmark, Brussels, Croatia, Hungary, Portugal just to name a few. And we always tell ourselves that we must return back to Istanbul and London, two places that we've fallen in love so much.

If everything is going according to what H said, I have about 70 days to enjoy my life here.

It's just like what people say - too much to do, too little time.

Makcik Urut

2013-01-12T21:59:00.000+01:00

We are probably going back to Malaysia end of February, not yet for good but maybe for a week or two. Since I didn't undergo a "proper" confinement period after the delivery, I'm looking forward to have a "berurut" session later. My mom has been pestering me to have one and like every mom, she is so concern of my postpartum well being since I did not do any of the usual bengkung, tangas, urut and tungku. Ok, I did berbengkung but putting on and off the bengkung itself was such a hassle so I decided to skip it after 4 days of wearing it. Sebab tu perut masih macam pregnant women in their first trimester. Padan muka aku.

So, I am in search of a makcik urut. I don't know anyone and need help if any of you can recommend me one. I don't have any specific criteria but she has to be:

affordable
mobile & can come to the house
well-experienced in postpartum massage

If not then I'll probably have to resort to Tanamera's confinement service since that's the only option that I know. I need to make the arrangement now because of the short period of our stay and I know that you have to spend at least 3 consecutive days for the massage and being me, I need to plan a schedule.

HELP!

Happy New Year

2013-01-01T22:46:00.001+01:00

It's only 10.45pm here in Oslo so technically we're still on 1st January 2013. To keep the blog's tradition going, (recap on 2011, 2010, 2009) let's do a recap on what it has been for me during 2012.

In January I moved to Oslo, got knocked up, traveled to Spain in May and Germany in June, gave birth to a wonderful baby boy in September and from then on, the journey to motherhood begins.

Sekian.

*bunyi cengkerik*

HAHA

Oklah disebabkan kemalasan melanda and I'm actually lost for words, I'm gonna let the pictures do the talking.

January

Made the biggest decision of my life and moved to Oslo, Norway to be with the love of my life. The first couple of weeks were the hardest because it was a transition period from used to work to unemployed. Went snow sledging for the first time with H and his friends and had so much fun.

View from our apartment's window on the arrival day

Snow sledging at Frognerseteren

February

We found out that I was pregnant! I was already a week late when I did the UPT and was over the moon when I was tested positive. We kept the news from most of our friends, even from our closest not until I reached second trimester but our parents knew it 5 minutes later. Haha.

March

Can't remember what happened in March but nothing much interesting to blog about. Oh, I had my first pregnancy check-up at week 10 and Alhamdulillah had a easy breezy first trimester.

April

Broke the news to blog-sphere that I was pregnant and was overwhelmed with all the warm wishes. You guys are the best! Went for the Company's skiing trip to Norefjell over the weekend. I was almost 13 weeks pregnant and because of that I couldn't join the fun.

My bump was pretty small and wasn't showing much during this time. Gosh, I miss being pregnant.

May

Traveled to the Andalusia region in Spain. Been wanting to travel to Spain for as long as I could remember. I was 18 weeks pregnant and Alhamdulillah, during the travel period, I had so much energy that even I was surprised. (Travelogue on Spain can be read here)

June

Took up knitting to kill boredom. Went to Aalen & Stuttgart, Germany to do some shopping for the baby.

July

Went back to Malaysia, tanah tumpahnya darahku for about a month and had a blast. Asyik makan, makan & makan je kerjanya.

August

Celebrated Eid di perantauan after 5 years. Entered third trimester and thought that I still have about 3 months to go but boy, I was wrong. Haha

September

Gave birth to Aqil Qays on 29.9.12 at mere 35 weeks. Terkejut beruk kau. Haha. The birth itself was a wonderful experience and alhamdulillah I had a fairly easy birth but because he was born early he was treated in NICU for 15 days. It was a nightmare and I was glad that it was over. I was grateful that I have a wonderful husband because if you give me all the money in the world, I won't go back to that 15 days period.

NEVER.

Nasib baik aku ni bukan mudah lemah semangat kalau tak dah lama gila meroyan oi.

October

The day Aqil was discharged from the hospital was the happiest day of my life! The first week was huru-hara & I was so sleep deprived dan maka bermulalah kes pengabaian blog kesayangan. HAHA.

November & December

Jaga anak. HAHA. Dasar pemalas kau Moose. Oh yeah, we celebrated our second anniversary!

Well, to summarize it all, 2012 has been a good year. It was more meaningful with the arrival of our beloved son and I was so surprised that after all the years of doubting myself, I actually had it in me - the maternal instinct. Hehe. Guess Yaya (and everyone else) was right. When the time comes, you'll know.

So goodbye 2012 and thanks for being such a wonderful year. Here's to another wonderful year, 2013!

Magic In a Jar

2012-12-31T11:17:00.000+01:00

I rarely do a product review but whenever I did, they are usually the ones that I personally used and loved. And at the moment, I'm in love with this amazing product from Earth Mama Angel Baby that I coined "magic in a jar" because it truly is - magic.

Image via Earth Mama Angel Baby

EMAB Angel Baby Bottom Balm is a life saver and I have been using it for Aqil from nappy rashes, "ruam susu" to even scratches on the face from his tiny long fingernails. Sometimes I even put the balm for no reason just because I love the refreshing antiseptic smell of tea tree oil. I'm a weirdo, I know.

When he was about 3 weeks old, I noticed that he had acne-like rashes all over his face and neck. Although the nurses said that it's normal for babies to have rashes when they were born, but being the first timer & over concern mother that I was (still am!), I decided to put on a small amount of the balm onto his skin and wallah - rashes gone in 2-3 days. Here, in cases of nappy rash, the nurses would advice you to put on zinc oxide but the thing with zinc oxide is that, it'll leave a whitish residue on his skin that I hate seeing and it is hard to get them off. One of the things that I love about the balm, it won't leave any residue. It's like the baby skin absorbs the goodness of it.

If you're concern on putting chemical-laden creams/lotion on baby's delicate skin - fret not, this balm is 100% organic and even recommended by hospitals. It's gentle to the skin and with the 100% natural ingredients, you know that they got your baby's back, literally. Say no to steroid based creams!

Now that you're convinced, where can you get them? I bought mine at Bee Little and so far, they offer the best price for all the EMAB products that they sell. Besides having the best price (that I found so far) in town, their service is also fast and convenient. You just gotta love a seller like that. For 60 ml, Bee Little is selling it for only RM38 (RRP: RM49.90). The price may seems on the high side but trust me, a little application goes a long way. After 3 months of usage, the balm doesn't look like it had been used. Tak luak lagi pun dalam bekas tu. I think 60 ml can last at least for another 3 months or so. So it's worth the money.

Try it and I'm sure you'll love it as much as I do.

Dearest Husband

2012-12-25T14:44:00.001+01:00

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you." - The Notebook

Happy second anniversary Husband. Here's to many happy years to come.

Nursing In Public

2012-12-18T10:38:00.000+01:00

Never ever I've thought that I would neglect my blog this long but being a new mom requires much of my attention and energy so I need to prioritize.

Semenjak dua menjak ni topik nursing in public (NIP) memang hot eh? I know the issue was triggered by a blogger tapi aku malas nak kisah sebab to each their own, right? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion dan kalau orang tak setuju, buat apa kita bermati-matian membangkang?

It's getting cold here and last week the temperature hit -16C, I know crazy, right! So out of curiosity, I posted some time ago on International Mothers and Babies Group Oslo (IMOBAGO) about nursing in public.

Aren't these ladies lovely coming up with such great solutions? You feel like hugging each and every one of them after reading those comments.

As I mentioned in the comment above, mothers in Malaysia are considered lucky because most of the shopping malls provide nursing room for mothers' convenience. Here, nursing mothers have to be more creative, you know, what's with the cold weather and lack of nursing rooms.

I was very anxious of the thought of nursing in public initially. A lot of things are going through my mind from covering the aurat to what position should I hold my son. I need to use the nursing pillow every time I breastfeed so the thought of being out of your comfort zone really scares the shit out of me.

Last month, when we went to Stockholm to register my son at the Malaysian Embassy, I was borderline nauseous because I know that at some point I have to do it, I have to NIP and it scares me. We were in the train to the airport when it happened. My son woke up and wanted milk. I am lucky because he is not a big crier so that gives me enough time to not panic and prep. Well, it wasn't t as scary as I thought it would be! Of course it was bit awkward with me constantly adjusting with holding position and all but yes - I can do this, I said to myself.

It was then the beginning of NIP for me. Ever since, I had NIP on the plane, at the airports, in the cafes, in shopping centers, you named it, I did it all without using any nursing cover or poncho. For me, the key point to a successful NIP is a supportive husband. He would be a watchman for me and help me to cover the aurat if it shows but most of the time I would wear a nursing friendly attire so that it won't be such a hassle. I enjoy my time and nursing in public is no longer a scary thing to me anymore

So tell me, how is your NIP experience?

Secret Baby Language

2012-11-22T16:49:00.000+01:00

My husband discovered an amazing video on YouTube yesterday that might save your time and energy when handling your baby. I don't know if some of you have heard of it before but I think it's worth sharing here.

It's called Dunstan baby language and was discovered by Priscilla Dunstan, an amazing lady gifted with an acoustic photographic memory. She claimed that all babies in the world speak the same language through their cries and convey their needs through it.

After watching the video astonishingly, Aqil's cries meet exactly as being described. I now can distinguish his needs based on his cries. He rarely cries without reason and whenever he cries, I know something is wrong so using the Dunstan language, I can respond to his needs faster and better.

It's awesome, isn't it?

Supposedly Your Birth Day

2012-11-04T01:08:00.001+01:00

This entry was meant to be published on 1/11 tapi semenjak jadi mak budak ni blog agak sedikit terabai maka lantaklah labu.

Dear Son,

It's amazing how time flies. Five weeks ago, your father and I were wondering how it would feel having you around when the day finally comes. Truthfully, I can't even remember how it feels not having you around. Ok I lied, mommy used to have enough sleep. Hehe. But that doesn't matter but I guess you already knew that or else I won't be waking up almost every hour to cater your needs.

Yes, the first couple weeks of your life were hectic. It broke my heart to see tubes and wires attached all over your tiny yet strong body. But you, my feisty little dragon braved it all.

We couldn't thank Allah enough.

Now here you are, with your cheeky and tiny self, lighten and brighten up our day, every single day without fail. And did you know that today is supposedly your birth day?

I guess even you can't wait to meet us.

Happy 33 days old, Aqil Qays.

Love, hugs and kisses;

Mama

The Birth Story

2012-10-23T16:04:00.001+02:00

So, where shall I begin?

My son is sleeping, H has started working after 3 weeks of paternity leave and I finally have some time to write about the birth story of my son. On 29th September, I gave birth to a healthy baby boy at 35 weeks and 3 days of his gestational age and due to that, he's considered as a late term preemie.

(This might be the beginning of a super long entry)

28th September

I went out to meet my husband for some grocery shopping after Friday prayer. We had late lunch at a Pakistani restaurant and when I went to the loo, I noticed some brown tinged stain and instantly knew that I just had a bloody show. Called two friends to ask about their opinions, one told me that she never had any bloody show for her two daughters so she couldn't advice more. Another friend told me that a bloody show could indicate that the labor is nearer but couldn't say more as it differs from a person to another.

Decided to take things lightly, we went grocery shopping as usual. At 7-ish pm, I decided to call the hospital for advice. Hospital said that I need not to worry but asked me to call them again if "fresh blood" came out instead of brown tinged stain or if I felt any contraction.

Nothing unusual happened that night.

29th September

Woke up for Subuh prayer and saw that menstruation-like blood stained my underwear. During this time, I felt no contraction at all. Around 6.45am, I couldn't sleep and felt very mild period pain. I hadn't had any period pain for the longest time so it was difficult to tell at first. I got up and hand-washed all the baby wool clothes that I'm saving till the end, hehe, and later set aside clothes for the hospital bag.

Around 8.15am, I tried to catch up reading the book - HypnoBirthing, The Mongan Method that I just received FOC on Wednesday from a lady I contacted via FB, while listening to the rainbow relaxation music. I practiced the relaxation breathing technique and read a bit on the J-breathing, all of these while my husband was sleeping. After some time, I decided to time the contraction for an hour and was positively sure it was an 5-1-1. I woke H up and told him that we might have to go to the hospital soon.

H was panicking but I was taking my own sweet time to pack the hospital bag. Haha. The hospital is only 5 minutes away, so what's the rush?

Before leaving the house, I had breakfast (more likely brunch, it was 12+ pm!), called my mom and H was Whatsapp-ing his parents.

Checked in at the hospital and the midwife performed CTG and vaginal examination (VE). Contrary to popular beliefs, VE IS NOT PAINFUL. I was about 1 cm dilated and baby was still high. I was on CTG for a while before the midwife came back and said that I might be warded for monitoring since I was still only 35 weeks pregnant.

CTG monitoring at the maternity ward

Was ushered to the labor room and the labor room midwife, Jutta greeted me. I wanted to eat first since I haven't eaten anything for lunch. Had few slices of bread, jam and cheese at the ward pantry. Contractions came and go at this stage. After lunch at around 4pm, I was put on constant electronic fetal monitoring (EFM) despite my refusal. I had no choice but to obey since it was a premature labor.

At this stage, contractions were at 5 minutes interval but getting intense and opening was at 2-3cm. While waiting, I managed to read the hypnobirth book especially on the birthing breathing. During the early hours, I also managed to recite surah Maryam, Yasin and listening to rainbow relaxation. H was reciting Quranic verses for air selusuh and hearing him reciting it, it helped me to doze off before intense surges came.

At 6.30pm, the midwife came to check upon me and at that time, I was 3-4 cm dilated. She came with a medical student for observation and jokingly told me that I was not a good example of laboring patient because I looked calm. LOL. Contractions were bearable at this point and I practiced slow breathing according to the book. Jutta offered few pain relief methods such as sterile water for injection, epidural and acupuncture. I politely declined (as I was determined to have drug-free and all natural birth) but told her that I'll keep her offer in mind.

Around 7-7.30pm, the contractions were getting more and more intense. Had 3 of those while I was in the toilet up to the point, I said - screw hypnobirth, give me epidural. Unfortunately, there were 2 ladies queuing for epidural as well so I didn't get the epidural immediately. 20 minutes later, the midwife came to check on me and I asked for it persistently. She told me that the anesthetist was in operating theater for an emergency c-sect and there was still a lady queuing. She performed another VE and was surprised that I was already 8cm dilated and told me - your epidural ship has sailed. Cheh.

H rubbed my back with love shape massage (or so it called, can't remember exactly) and recited selawat to my ears. It helped to calm me, in a way. Then the midwife inserted some sort of electrode and immediately after, I felt water gushing out. By then I know that my water bag has broken. Heard the midwife said the water was greenish in colour and the baby might have pooped inside. By this time I felt massive pressure to do #2 a.k.a the baby was ready to be pushed and on midwife's cue, I was asked to push when the contraction came. I tried my best to do the birthing breathing or J-breathing but couldn't remember any. At that point I was doing what the midwife told me to do so bye-bye hypnobirthing. Sobs. She helped to put some pressure on the perineum area so that I won't tear much. I think after 3-4 rounds of contractions, my baby was out.

I requested for immediate skin-to-skin contact with my baby and the umbilical cord to be cut only after it has stopped pulsating. H did the honor of cutting the cord. My son however has difficulty in breathing and he was whisked to NICU after I delivered the placenta. Later we were told that he had a "wet" lung and had to be in NICU for constant monitoring as he was also late term preemie. And then the nightmare of 15 days stay at the hospital began, but that was a different story.

Fresh from the oven

In a way I think, hypnobirth partly help me to stay calm and gain composure during the first few hours but somehow I felt guilty for panicking when the intense surges came and lose focus on the breathing towards the end. I wish that I had more time to read and practice but what's done is done as I still had my initial wish, to have a drug-free and natural delivery. I had no episiotomy and had a 2nd degree tear and alhamdulillah, the stitches healed in a week.

So that's the birth story of my son, Aqil Qays who was born at 35 weeks and 3 days weighing 2525g, measuring 44cm at 9.13pm at Oslo Ulleval Universitetssykehus.

AQIL QAYS

An Email From Stranger

2012-09-21T13:27:00.000+02:00

You know how in Facebook you can join all sorts of available groups kan? When I tested positive, I came across the International Mother and Baby Group Oslo (IMABAGO) and joined them shortly afterwards. I was a silent member but until recently, I decided to post this there:

I received lots of positive feedback from mothers who actually gone through successful natural birth - hypnobirth or not, at the hospital mentioned. None of them replied with any negative birth stories at all, which made me so relief (oh, you have no idea how relief I am actually). Most of them encouraged me to apply for ABC (Alternative Birth Care) section of the hospital where water birth and acupuncture or water for injection as pain relief are made possible but I just think that they're too fancy for me. I have nothing against it but it's just a matter of preference.

What almost send me to tears was, an email I received from a complete stranger who is also an advocate of hypnobirth that's so inspiring that I just have to share it here.

Hi M,

I hope all is well with you.

I am so passionate about hypnobirthing and so wish i had the time to give you the full course but i'll try to give you some of the main tips that i hope can help you and also tell you about my experiences and what i feel is important to know.

HypnoBirthing is all about conditioning your mind to having a positive birth experience. One of the most important things you can do for you and your baby right now is to disregard any of the horror stories that you hear surrounding birthing. If someone starts to say something negative please just say you are hypnobirthing and you would prefer not to hear any negative stories. It serves no purpose to you or your baby. Birth is completely natural and our bodies are so amazingly clever and have been made in such a way that we can give birth to our babies with little or no pain in a very relaxed and natural way. I have done it twice and so i absolutely assure you it is possible.

Can you get a copy of the hypnobirthing book and rainbow relaxation cd from emily on barneting? If not let me know and i'll try to get back the copies that i gave out to my first couple that i taught.

You need to read the book, in particular read about the function of the uterus and you need to read about the different breathing techniques. You have to practice the breathing techniques and you have to listen to the rainbow relaxation CD every single day. It's ok to go to bed with your earphones in listening to it, download it to your ipod it doens't matter if you fall asleep while listening to it. It will be going in to your subconcious and conditioning your mind in a VERY positive way. When i felt my first surge (surge is a contraction, hypnobirthing uses softer language when talking about birthing) i immediately went in to the slow breathing and kept this going the entire birth until i needed to change to birth breathing which is when you breath the baby down the last leg of the journey. i was completely relaxed and got more and more relaxed with each surge despite them getting stronger. It is because i practiced it so much that this type of relaxation became second nature to me.

Learn how to do the different breathing and when you are feeling stressed or have a pain try the slow breathing its amazing how the pain will disappear and you become so relaxed. When you go to the toilet to poo practice the birth breath or slanted j breath, they sometimes call it in the book because this is the breathing you switch to as the baby is about to emerge. Try it and you will see how the poo is naturally expelled using the bodies own natural expulsion reflex and this is the same as when the baby is breathed out (not pushed out) breathed out. The body will naturally expell the baby if it is allowed to do so in its own time.

In norway there are many midwives who are familiar with natural birth and i was very fortunate in my second birth to have such a midwife. She asked me what my preferences were and i said i wanted to be left alone as much as possibble in a dark room and for it to be very peaceful and she sat and observed me and only came to me to help ease the baby out in the last 10 minutes. She knew that i had switched to the birth breath and it was such a quiet subtle change but she knew and that was incredible for me and her.

My first experience was different as the hospital midwife told me when i was on a visit beforehand that she had been a midwife 25 years and there is no other way for a baby to come out unless you push it out - this is absolute nonsense and i wish i had the courage to stand up to that midwife becuase i truly believed it was possible to do it without forced pushing but because it was my first i thought what do i really know. This is where the birthing partner comes in, they have to keep negative influences away from you during hte birth. In my case i had my husband prepped to tell midwives to be quiet if they were disturbing me, i didnt want to hear loud chatting, i didnt want to be disturbed if i was in my zone of relaxation. they tried so many times and it was incredibly frustrating but luckily as the birth progressed my husband stopped them disturbing me more and more.

The course is given to both the mother and birthing partner. The birthing partner has a very important role to play. As i keep repeating birthing naturally is completely achievable but to do it in a relaxed way without feeling the pain takes a lot of practice but its so worth it. Studies show that calmer births do result in calmer babies, The baby is completely affected by their own birthing experience. There are some texts in the book that the birthing partner can use to get you in to a deeper state of relaxation. If you can practice with your partner and get your partner to read some of these to you, in a slow relaxing way (you'll fall about laughing the first time) but if you can do it seriously this is an invaluable tool that your partner can bring with in to the birth to use when needed. For example if you just have some niggling back pain, or you have been distrubed or if you need to go deeper in to relaxation the book gives the scripts that the partner can read to you.

During the birth you can have the rainbow relaxation CD playing. i used this for much of the time as i had conditioned my mind so well to it that as soon as i heard the music and voice i completely relaxed.

The main principal of hypnobirthing is if you are relaxed then your body can use its natural endorphin which are a million times more powerful than any medicated pain relief. Your uterine muscles are made to rotate in harmony with your slow breathing during birth. If you are tense then these muscles tighten and adrenalin kicks in which takes the much needed blood flow aaway from the uterine muscles and cause the flight or fight response. the muscles you need for birth tense up and everything works against you. So, keep calm, if you feel pain don't stress breath slower, deeper, relax more.

Water birthing is fabulous for relaxation and using in combination with hypnobirthing.youtube natural water births and hypnobirths and see for yourself how calm and relaxed these women are its empowering to see.

Wow, there is so much more to tell you, like i say i wish i could help more. if you have more questions please don't hesitate to drop me an email.

I guess the main thing is practice the relaxation!!!

Wishing you a wonderful happy calm hypnobirthing birth for you and your baby.

Sending all positive energy your way.

Best wishes Hannah

If you haven't give hypnobirthing a thought, maybe it's time you do. After all, it's how the nature intends the birth of a child should be.

Sending positive vibes, thoughts and affirmation to all new mothers to be. We can do this!

Berpantang

2012-09-18T13:10:00.002+02:00

Few days ago my husband questioned me about how effective is the Malay traditional routines during the confinement period that every new mothers have to go through, be it 30-days, 44-days or even 60-days. The most common period is I believe, is 44 days.

Until I'm pregnant, those confinement routines like bertungku, bertangas, bekung seem like a foreign language to me. But of course, being a first born, I've seen Mother gone through it all but I didn't really comprehend the logic behind all those rituals.

When I found out that I was pregnant, the first question that everyone seems to ask was, how am I going to go through the confinement period? Is there anyone coming to help me (and us) after the delivery? I haven't give much thought on it till people were asking about it as I didn't expect that I will go through (strict) confinement rules giving the condition that we're in, living 10,000 kilometers away from our parents.

Being away from family means I have to take charge and have to look at the berpantang period from a different angle. I'm planning to take this time as a rejuvenation period, as in the time to gain back energy and be healthy so that I can take care of the baby better. I also plan on eating as much as nutritious food as possible and not to focus much of the weight that should be shed. After all, a happy mom is equal to a happy baby and thus, a happy family. Lately, I've been compiling few nutritious-laden confinement recipes for H for him to cook and prepare them during his 2 weeks paternity leave. Sometimes I wonder why most people often associate confinement period as being boring because when I look at the menu, you will be spoilt for choice. You have turmeric chicken, chicken soup, black pepper beef, steamed and grilled fish etc. Man, I'm salivating already!

The funny thing about Malay traditional confinement menu is that, it differs from one family to another. In my family, new mothers can basically eat all sorts of protein - beef, (white) fish and chicken. Seafood and egg are forbidden as they are deemed "gatal". Most vegetables and fruits are allowed except those that are deemed "gassy or windy". I've heard people saying that confinement rituals should be followed strictly since it'll affect the bodily performance & functions in the future. What got me thinking is that, how about the after confinement period? Don't you have to take care of your body as well? Or your body only precious to you during the short 44 days period?

My husband and I had an interesting conversation on food that the Malays forbid during the confinement period. We know that in science, a hypothesis is proposed explanation for a phenomenon. For a hypothesis to be scientifically hypothesis (in this case, since such food will affect the bodily functions in the future, I take that we need more scientific evidence to make it more concrete), the scientific method requires one to test it. When no scientific evidence is produce, a hypothesis will just remain - well, a myth.

Am I right or wrong here?

Stretchmarks

2012-09-12T14:59:00.000+02:00

I know it's inevitable not to have stretch marks during the pregnancy, but at least a good stretch marks cream/lotion can help to lessen and alleviate its appearance and itchiness that comes with it. I've been looking for an all natural or organic stretch mark cream/lotion to use since the beginning of the pregnancy and my first choice would be the Natural Stretch Oil from Earth Mama Angel Baby but sadly it is not available in Oslo.

Upon reading, I came across Burt Bees Mama Bee Belly Butter and based on the many reviews, I was sold. The price might be on the high side at 429 NOK (RM230) but it lasts long. Bought mine when I was at week 13 and despite religiously applying it to my tummy (almost) every day, a container can last me even till week 40 (or more!). The texture is thick so a little application goes a long way. It has cocoa butter, shea butter and vitamin E, the 3 important components that you should look for when purchasing a stretch marks cream/lotion.

I bought Tanamera confinement set and this set comes together with the highly raved virgin coconut oil (VCO) and since then I've been alternating between these two products. Normally, during the day I use the Belly Butter and at night I apply the vco because I'd smell like a coconut cookie afterwards. Hehe.

I love both products because they are easily absorb by the skin, leaving no oily residue and yet your skin feels very moisturized afterwards. But then a good stretch marks cream won't help much if you gain weight rapidly and too much during the pregnancy because your skin will stretch out too much, hence leaving a mark. So in order to combat that, the weight gain progress must be slow and steady and at the same time applying cream that is high in vitamin E (shea & cocoa butter) helps in making the skin more elastic.

At 33 weeks so far, I have yet to see any stretch marks appear buutttttt, I'm praying hard that it won't appear AT ALL. Or even if they decided to make an appearance, I pray that it won't be that severe and ugly.

Sounds impossible? Huhu.

Stuff

2012-09-11T03:30:00.000+02:00

How I managed to pack these (and another half) in an 29" luggage is beyond my understanding. I guess it took years of packing skills and determination to do it. We did most of our shopping for the baby when we were back in Malaysia last July because of the cheaper price (compared to Oslo) dan lagi satu sebab barang-barang berpantang macam set bersalin, pati ikan haruan & minyak untuk baby macam telon ke yuyi etc. tu memang sah-sah la tak jual sini kan.

Kebetulan pulak, hujung bulan 7 tu ada baby expo jadi memang haruslah ambil kesempatan disitu dan agak memudahkan kerja jugaklah sebab tak payah nak survey sana sini. Mula-mula ingat nak beli barang penting macam storage bottle/plastic, swaddle, receiving blankets etc. tapi orang cakap dah alang-alang semua benda ada situ baiklah beli terus which explained kenapa nail clipper, thermometer & berus botol pun kena angkut sekali macamlah Oslo ni takde jual. Hikhik. Jangankan berus botol, oral care baby pun aku angkut sekali ok. Gigih sangat mak ni tau kata anak aku.

During the expo, I didn't go crazy over clothes because I'm gonna have an autumn/winter baby and most of the clothes sold in Malaysia are not suitable for it. Tapi ada jugakla beli 3 sets of newborn tops, pants & leggings from Fiffy because they're dirt cheap at RM6/piece. Other than that, most of the baby's clothes are bought here (during sale or jumble sale). Talking about jumble sale, few months ago, we went to a jumble sale organized by Oslo International School. Pretty clothes (and branded!) are abundant tapi malangnya we were not crazy at that time sebab masa tu I think I was still 4 months pregnant jadi taknakla excited sangat over baby preparation ni. Ambil langkah berjaga-jaga orang kata. But yeah, those moms yang gila shopping memang akan rambang mata. Walaupun baju-baju tu mostly second hand tapi masih nampak baru tambah-tambah baju branded macam Carter's, OshKosh B'gosh, Zara, Petit Bateau, Polarn O. Pyret etc. yang memang high quality tu. Tapi depends on orang jugak, ada orang geli nak pakai baju second hand but as for me, I don't mind at all. Lepas beli basuhlah bersih-bersih lagipun in this case, baju baby bukan pakai lasak macam baju orang besar kan.

Speaking of basuh baju, I plan to start doing the laundry when I hit 36 weeks tapi bila dengar Jaja bersalin masa week 36, tiba-tiba rasa cuak pulak. So most probably will do the laundry in another 2 weeks depending on how rajin I am at that time. Heeehee.

Oh no, so much to do yet so little time!

32 weeks

2012-09-06T14:41:00.000+02:00

Ok, I am slowly joining the bandwagon of those preggers who can't stop updating about their pregnancy journey. Until the baby comes out, please bear with me. HAHA.

I had my 32 weeks check up yesterday and everything was normal except that the midwife detected a bacteria in the urine but since it was not my first pee of the day and I hadn't experiencing any pain while peeing, she assured me not to worry about it and advises that I must bring my own sample during the next check up for more accurate result. Apart from that, blood pressure, protein and hemoglobin level are normal. The OGTT result came and alhamdulillah, I need not to worry about that. I know that I have been careful with what I eat and the test was actually a precaution as my family has a history of diabetes so when the result was a OK, I was relief.

The midwife that I'm seeing works at the hospital that I am registered so we discussed a bit on the birth plan. I am glad that the hospital is pro-natural birthing and if I require an alternative birthing for example water birth and whatnot, I need to write them a letter stating my birth preferences and they'll refer me to a special unit called, Alternative Birthing Care (ABC). If not, I can discussed the birthing plan when D(elivery)-Day comes. I don't have much request to begin with actually, my only request are that;

no frequent vaginal examination
no artificial breakage of water bag
no pain killers (but I'll keep this in view. As much as I know I have high pain threshold, we never know what's going to happen when the day comes)
immediate skin to skin contact
birth partner to be present throughout labor progress and be allowed to cut the cord
no immediate washing/rubbing of the vernix caseosa of the baby
episiotomy only if necessary and only after discussion
be allowed to move freely or any position deemed to ease the labor

Ok, that's all that I could think right now. In a way, I am a hypnobirthing convert. HAHA.

We also discussed the possibility if I am past the EDD and what action should be taken if I had one. Lucky in Norway, expected mothers are given 10 days allowance before any medical intervention taken place, be it artificial birth induction or Cesarean. That, if the mothers are having normal and healthy pregnancy. But according to her statistically, most expectant mothers give birth within week 38-week 40. Now, lets hope that this lil bub of mine contributes to that statistic.

8 weeks (or less) to go people! Can you believe it?!

What's In A Name?

2012-09-03T14:27:00.000+02:00

Before we found out that I was pregnant, I already have few baby names that I like. These names were acquired even before I was married. Among all the names that I like, I always love these 2 names combination in particular that if I were to have a girl, she will be named that.

However, I also like my maternal grandmother's name who passed away when I was merely a year old that in tribute to her, I would also love to name my girl after her.

Nenek Madina and I circa 1984

But H has been so adamant with his strictly one-name-only policy that sometimes I just wish I can strangle the idea out of him. You see, my husband has probably the longest and hard to pronounce first name that sometimes I think it frustrates him when people can't pronounce it correctly that he mostly goes by his second name. And out of this frustration, I reckon he's more adamant with his policy than ever. We have shortlisted few names since the beginning of my pregnancy and been calling the baby the name that we picked since I was in the second trimester. Initially H was unsure on the idea of adding a second name but after much coaxing, he finally agrees to it and now, I can proudly say that we already have the name for our little bub. I love simplicity and the meaning of the names and hopefully s/he will live up to her/his name. Insya Allah.

I am still keeping the gender of our baby a secret but has recently spill the beans to some of my close friends, our relatives and #chanteks. Hopefully they will keep mum on this or else, I know whom I shall look for if the secret is out in the open.

HAHA.