Enigma

Host and Guest.

2014-09-14T10:24:00.000-07:00

Host and Guest.

A ferocious force that you are, O Wind

Can you take this lamppost

that I cling to?

My last and only hope

And without further ado

Relinquish your endeavors.

Since I am not leaving

Nor is this lamppost,

To no avail are

Your efforts of cleaving

Now you be my guest

And let me be your host

You might've taken my all

But I'm not yet lost!

Vomit.

2014-08-28T06:22:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking of committing suicide for some time now. It’s all hell here. I don’t really care, I know but still I wish I’d rather be dead than go on living with people who are all completely mad. Or maybe they’re all normal and I am mad. Either way, there’s no match. Sometimes you think hating the ones who gave you birth is a sin. But does an inside feeling count as a sin? If you’re trying hard not to let your behavior cause them any harm, it’s okay I think. If you’re not letting your feelings corrupt your demeanor, it’s just alright. May be you have to feel. You have to know what is inside you. That is the only way you can keep insanity at bay. Or if it runs in your blood, you can delay its onset.

I have never liked nice girls. They aren’t really nice. We all know they’re only pretending. They’re letting the bitter litter pile up inside of them so that they can either turn into true bitches or end up completely broken. Once in a while, you have to let the bitterness out. Maybe we are unable to satisfy ourselves with a few-word definition of ‘nice’. Our definition is so long, it’s more of an explication. If one is helpful, supportive, and comforting in your hard times, I think that’s nice enough. They don’t have to fabricate their expressions, words and tone to be nice because words are mere sounds when someone really needs you to act. I have hated such nice girls. They aren’t nice but hypocrites. I believe in pouring all the litter out. It’s again, morally, very bad, I understand. Oh God, I might end up in hell but oh! I can’t let myself commit suicide and enhance my chances up to one hundred percent. I believe in finding remedies to my maladies when I can and don’t avoid being a bitch temporarily if it can save my soul from crushing which might lead me to crush my physical being later on. Devil may care what people say. This is something I have least cared about—at least for a past few years. It has made my life really easy. Saved me a lot of head and heart-ache. I hate being where I am and there aren’t very bright chances to be elsewhere better in the future because I don’t want to keep up my hopes and end up in an even worse place—which would again, I am afraid, might lead to self-annihilation.

Maybe this is what I fear—self-annihilation. No, I guess it’s the terrible after-life that follows it.

I have many flaws in my faith, I know but I hope I’ll get better soon.

A review for The Kite Runner (Movie)

2014-08-28T06:20:00.003-07:00

The Kite Runner— Every time I watch this movie, it makes me cry. I am simply in love with it, I guess. If it is necessary to mention, I’d like to say that the acting of both these boys, Hassan and Amir, is simply marvelous! Apart from the story being so beautifully delicate, I specifically admired the little story within the main story of the novel. Here goes beauty:

What’s the story about?

It’s about a man who finds a magic cup. And he learns that if he weeps into the cup, his tears turn to pearls. He’s very poor, you know? And at the end of the story, he’s sitting on a mountain of pearls with a bloody knife in his hand and his dead wife in his arms.

So he killed her?

Yes, Hassan.

So that he’d cry and get rich.

Yes, you’re very quick.

What?

Nothing, Amir Agha. Are you done with breakfast?

What?

Well, will you permit me to ask a question about the story?

Of course.

Why did the man have to kill his wife?

Because each of his tears becomes a pearl.

Yes, but why couldn’t he just smell an onion?

I am too late sometimes in experiencing the pleasure good movies bring. It almost gets to a time when most other people have not only already experienced but also forgotten about a particular movie.

Well, never mind, but I think I desperately needed to pour it out somewhere how immensely I loved and enjoyed this one. J

A Hilariously Critical Review and Appreciation for 'An Abundance of Katherines'.

2014-07-18T23:51:00.004-07:00

Okay, so as the name of this post implies… I can’t guarantee but I’ve tried as hell to make this review at least just as hilarious as the novel itself was! This review I have intended to write especially to express my heartiest gratitude to John Green for writing An Abundance of Katherines. I mean, most people know him for the “Okay? Okay.”—which is to say, TFIOS but seriously, you can understand my level of disappointing seriousness from the fact that I didn’t bother about writing a review for it even though I successfully finished it in just one and a half day. Not to say that it (TFIOS) wasn’t good or was very bad and absolutely avoiding going towards either of the extremes… I guess, it just had plenty of dialogs... and those too, pretty good ones but hell, I just kept looking for the emotional twist in it. I mean, I wonder how people ended up literally crying after reading it when all I was searching for was an emotional twist in the whole goddamn novel! Queer. Well, forget it. Maybe I don’t have a predilection for the best-sellers.

So this novel in question, an abundance of Katherines, is one hell of a hilarious piece of fiction written by JG-- A piece of literature with the perfect blend of humor and wit. From anagrams to generating a mathematical formula for interpreting a construct as abstract as love-- It was really stupid, no doubt but altogether very unique and different in its own way. What I enjoyed the most were the added “Q &A with John Green” and the hilariously witty references in the end. God, those were hilarious as crap! And personally—now this is me speaking directly to JG—I am so grateful to your crappy mind for producing a character like Hassan Harbish-- with all his sitzpinkler and Kafir. Ok. Really. And I mean it—THANK YOU! Hassan happens to be the best and only friend the child prodigy (and the miserably dumped protagonist of our story) Colin Singleton has. And he is one hell of a hilarious creature—giving the novel just the right amount of brutal Arabic-and-other-language-humor punch it needed. I ain’t gonna spoil the whole humor thing here, because, honestly speaking, that’s the only life the novel’s got but I’m dying to share on my blog this hilarious incident of wild hog where Hassan and Colin were on a hunt for a feral hog and finally-successfully ended up confronting a bore in the wild. Here goes the event;

“Dude,” said Hassan softly. “Khanzeer.”

“Matha, al-khanazeer la yatakalamoon araby? (Arabic for- “What, pigs don’t speak Arabic?”)” Colin asked.

“That’s no pig,” answered Hassan in English. “That’s a goddamned monster.” The pig stopped its rooting and looked up at them. “I mean, Wilbur is a fugging pig. Babe is a fugging pig. That thing was birthed from the loins of Iblis.” It was clear now the pig could see them. Colin could see the black in its eyes.

“Stop cursing. The feral hog shows a remarkable understanding of human speech, especially

profane speech,” he mumbled, quoting from the book.

“That’s a bunch of bullshit,” Hassan said, and then the pig took two lumbering steps toward them, and Hassan said, “Okay. Or not. Fine. No cursing. Listen, Satan Pig. We’re cool. We don’t want to shoot you. The guns are for show, dude.”

“Stand up so he knows we’re bigger than he is,” Colin said.

“Did you read that in the book?” Hassan asked as he stood.

“No, I read it in a book about grizzly bears.”

“We’re gonna get gored to death by a feral fugging hog and your best strategy is to pretend it’s a

grizzly bear?”

Okay, so if you’re looking for some real laugh and hilarious-as-hell literature to bring you out of the blue mood state or I don’t know, may be extreme temperatures, that’s the book I have to suggest. Cheers! Have a good read!

Moral learned: Also, don't forget to say 'Dingleberries' when an argument or a situation has gone out of hand with a possible threat to lead to a feud/row/dustup/dispute-- Okay, I'm no prodigy. Don't take me wrong.

Endnote: The vituperative Tennessee argot’s only used to match the level of humor of the novel. Nothing offensive. Okay. Dingleberries. J

The Seven Deadly Sins and The Deadliest Among Them.

2014-06-10T01:36:00.005-07:00

The seven deadly sins, also known as the capital vices or cardinal sins, is a classification of vices that has been used to educate and instruct people concerning fallen humanity's tendency to sin. In the currently recognized version, the sins are usually given as wrath, avarice, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony. Each is a form of Idolatry-of-Self wherein the subjective reigns over the objective. These seven deadly sins are not discrete from other sins, but are instead the origin ("capital" comes from the Latin caput, head) of the others.

In the Book of Proverbs, among the verses traditionally associated with King Solomon, it states that the Lord specifically regards "six things the Lord hateth, and seven that are an abomination unto Him", namely:

1. A proud look

2. A lying tongue

3. Hands that shed innocent blood

4. A heart that devises wicked plots

5. Feet that are swift to run into mischief

6. A deceitful witness that uttereth lies

7. Him that soweth discord among brethren

At the core of the deadliest one amongst the aforementioned seven deadly sins is Denial, a primitive human ego defense mechanism that negates all realities that produce too much stress for the brain to handle.

In ancient mythology, a hero in denial is the ultimate manifestation of hubris and pride. No man is more 'prideful' than he who believes himself immune to the dangers of the world. Dante Alighieri, a famous Florentine poet and the author of The Divine Comedy, clearly agreed, denouncing pride as the worst of the seven deadly sins and therefore, he punished the prideful in the deepest ring of the 'inferno'.

Classification of the sins according to Christian Ethics and their description at length in the mythologies provoke a sane mind to opine that there might be some truth in them as they are the backbone of the infinity of crimes and misdeeds our modern age humanity faces at the moment.

On the importance of humility, the great Martin Luther King is quoted here; "God creates out of nothing. Therefore, until a man is nothing, God can make nothing out of him".

The above text is an amalgam of the inspirations taken from Dante's The Divine Comedy, Professor Langdon's dialog from Inferno, quotes taken from somewhere-on-the-internet and description of The Seven Deadly Sins from Wikipedia, published in the moral interest of masses.

Desire. Eternity. Tear.

2013-12-01T01:39:00.001-08:00

Life teaches you so much at such a 'tender age'. It depends on you now whether or not you learn anything from those experiences. Funny thing is, we think that we have learnt so much and can never be fooled again but we still fall in to the same ditch. Solace and internal peace is so hard to find, to tell you the truth. But more often than not, you feel a spiritual feeling that tells you that everything you are living and breathing in is so temporary and is not going to last. It is beautiful indeed; to think that this world is not going to last. Because it's so full of tragedies, deception and traumas that it hurts to think and desire for immortality.
Eternity can also be beautiful, if it actually promises to keep us happy. But with such a devilish human nature, it's so hard for us humans to be actually happy and solaced. We are restless creatures. We are quarreling over petty issues. Yet we live, we love and we cry.
Crying is also a phenomenon which, in my opinion, helps us 'get over it'.
Once upon a time, it so happened that there was a girl who cried at every little thing. Because she 'felt' so much, you see. She, later on, realized that she needed to feel less. So, with the passage of time, she rarely felt anything at all and her melting heart turned into cold iceberg. She again realized that it was important for her to feel in order to 'let it all out'. So she started feeling again. Now, she felt and thought and got over it. For her experiments, she needed people around her. And they are always available in abundance, as you know. She had now begun to think that she was the most normal person on earth. She indeed was because she rarely got a headache now that had been caused by other people. She left people easily, had no one to stand by her or cry for her; she didn't even feel humiliation, but yet she thought it was normal. It indeed was normal, for her emotional health it was! She knew the meaning of sacrifice and that was all she ever wanted to learn. She liked it. She liked to know so much at such a 'tender age'. She knew the difference between first love and true love. She knew how to swallow her pride and also how to stand up for the right thing. She knew how to be rude and how to be polite. She knew how to be a devil and how to be an angel at the same time. She liked helping others and laughing when there was no one to help her at her time of need, feeling proud at 'already predicting that'. But she was ashamed. She had confessions to make. She had unfulfilled desires and unexpressed emotions. And this is why she loved staying home alone and crying the pending tears. Remember her in your prayers. She loves you.

Life.

2013-06-30T10:10:00.001-07:00

She was upset that day. Very upset. She had been sick. Her appearance was so calm and cool though, that some people doubted if she actually was feeling low, others simply called her a pretender.

People cannot be stopped from assuming whatever they want to. If you are outspoken and blunt (that too being a girl), they have a simple term to refer u with; a bitch. They would call u a bitch, they wouldn't think if they have been acting like one as well. So, there she was. She was not loved by people very much, yet if they needed any assistance, they had only one name in mind; hers. She was different, people might think she had some psychological defect (which she did have, by the way), so she went from being asocial to being totally extrovert to being an introvert back again. She knew the concept of an ideal person, but she was not one herself. She had no friend, to tell you the truth. Although she was, but people did not assume her a loner because they already had a term to refer her with and it is against human nature to challenge one’s previously held beliefs.

In the past, she has had a broken soul. People thought, since she was always lachrymal, that she cannot survive with such a depressed state of mind. Later, she began to get aggressive; aggression, as you know, is pivotal to survival. So, when loneliness and aggression collided, people were bound to call her what she had been called. She never confided in anybody. At first she thought it made her strong and she was done with people. There came a time when she was so strong that her guard was up with her own self, all the time, day and night; days, weeks, months, a whole year went by and she had not cried once! So, it was building up in her for quite some time. Thinking about her agitated emotional state, it was then that she realized that all she wanted at that moment was to cry it all out. She was praying for tears to come now but they weren't coming. It was a conditioning of a whole year after all. She actually began to try out ways that could make her cry. First, she got in to rows and thought humiliation might work. When it didn't, she tried ordinary self-harm techniques (she was not an advocate of suicide or homicide, by the way, because she did not want to leave her parents lament and deal with what she was dealing with now) that would only cause enough pain to bring out the tears but eventually, it failed too. She thought later, how could she be so stupid to think of ways that she had become so used to already. So, she went for out-of-the-box thinking and tried out simple ways that were so popular in making people cry (and that, by the way, people were very proud of too, because it helped them consider themselves fragile and delicate). She began to read stupid love stories and watch movies that exhibited the stories of unfortunate passive individuals with whom life had been unfair, and, surprisingly, this helped her cry! And cry and cry and cry for days and nights…. People were thinking now that she must be going through a rough patch, hence the swollen eyes and all but she was as happy as a baby is when he gets his id satisfied. So, you see, not everything is ever as it seems.

So, now in the day she was funny and cracked hilarious jokes when she was in company but her face told a different story (from the night’s cry and all). People never asked her anything, you see. They already knew (perhaps unconsciously) that they weren't worth being confided in.

She lived on. She is still living. She is hoping for the best everyday she wakes up. She's confronted with failures and humiliation many a times, but she's living, you know. That is what she is expected to do. That is what she should do, and this is why she is so amazing!

Aleph by Paulo Coelho: Book Review

2013-06-25T06:01:00.000-07:00

Ta-da! Another book review is here! (Disclaimer: The following review is the blogger's personal opinion and has nothing to do with whatever any or everyone else thinks about the book).
Okay, before I go on grumbling about the book, I should tell you that Aleph happens to be a very sacred alphabet for people belonging to many faiths in this world including Moslems, Jews and Christians; it is also the first letter of Hebrew and Arabic language. The name of the Creator of the worlds (as believed by the believers of above mentioned religions) also begins with the same letter. Being a Moslem, I (previously unconsciously and now consciously) also feel immense respect for this letter.

So, a few months back, when I heard that Paulo has written a book with this title, I felt an uncanny wish to read it. I kept looking for it whenever I went out and finally found it. I bought my copy and kept it safely because I had my exams going on back then. I couldn't wait to start it and as soon as I got free, I held Aleph in my hands for consecutive 3 days and nights and most unfortunately and unexpectedly, when I was finished with it, I felt utter feelings of disappointment and disgust. I can not explain why but precisely because Coelho, like many other authors, had amalgamated some very pathetic dogmas with sacred doxology. Not only that but also I found it really ridiculous how he utilized the translation of a Quranic verse (without comprehending the context) for supporting his own cerebration. Coelho was the last man on earth I expected to do such a stupid thing but alas! he did.
Apart from utilizing a witch-hunting event from the past as the basis for his story (which does not appear to be a solid basis), the repetition of the Magical Tradition, Traditions of the sun and moon and other myths (which he has already talked about in Brida and has now become a cliche), the character of Hilal was also questionable. Brida and Hilal seemed to have a lot in common, with the exception that Hilal had an exacerbated sense of sensual pleasure. Coelho, however, has shown nudity to be the only matter of interest for Hilal.
Coelho himself shows an air of indifference towards all the sins he did in his past lives (this life, according to him, is his incarnation as a Brazilian writer). The same indifference he showed towards his wife's disappearance in The Zahir. When it didn't and it doesn't matter to him, why care? This is something he has been unable to explain in his stories (even in the author's note at the end).
Well, the fact remains that apart from all the flaws, he does have some highly philosophical sayings in his books, I'd like to share a few of those here with you all (taken from Aleph):
"If we seek something, that same thing is seeking us"
"Anyone who knows God cannot describe Him, anyone who can describe God does not know Him"
"When God spoke to Moses, He said: "I am", so God is, therefore, neither the subject nor the predicate, He's the verb, the action"
"I free myself from hatred through forgiveness and love. I understand that, suffering, when it can not be avoided, is here to help me on my way to glory"

"I forgive the tears I was made to shed
I forgive the pain and the disappointment
I forgive the betrayals and the lies
I forgive the slanders and the intrigues
I forgive the hatred and the persecution
I forgive the blows that hurt me
I forgive the wrecked dreams
I forgive the still-born hopes
I forgive the hostility and jealousy
I forgive the indifference and ill-will
I forgive the injustice carried out in the name of justice
I forgive the anger and the cruelty
I forgive the neglect and the contempt
I forgive the world and all its evils"
"I understand that all roads meet and all rivers flow in to the same sea. That is why, I am, at this moment, an instrument of forgiveness"
"Dreamers cannot be tamed"
"Spiritual growth doesn't always arrive hand-in-hand with wisdom"
"No one wants to think we'll be saying goodbye shortly and promising to meet up again soon, knowing that the purpose of this promise is simply to make parting easier"

Like there are two sides to every coin, like there are good and bad people in this world, like we all have our good and bad days and like all of us have good and bad aspects in our personalities; this book also had some good and bad stuff in it. I tried and shared both with you here, the choice of including it in your library remains yours. Have a good one! :)

Untitled

2013-02-16T08:38:00.003-08:00

"So, why did you try to commit suicide"

" because, things weren't exactly working out according to the plan"

"plan of what sort?"

"forget plan, I would rather use the word expectation"

"what were your expectations?"

"I do not see any of your business in knowing that"

"you have been sent here so that I may be able to help you"

"what makes you think I need your help?"

"your suicide attempt apparently supports that notion"

"listen doc., had anyone on this earth would have been able to help me or had there been anyone I considered trustworthy enough to confide the secrets of my soul in, I wouldn't have attempted the suicide in the first place. I wouldn't say that I am ok, and that I don't need help. No, I am not ok and yes, I do need help but I'm simply not available with the kind of circumstances and people I yearn for"

"what kind of circumstances and people do you yearn for?"

"I think you are simply trying to rephrase your last question that I already refused to answer"

"okay, then tell me what do you expect of me? how can I help you?"

"you can help me by only letting me stay in this hospital until I am in my right mind; there's only one thing that I wish to tell you and that is that I do not want to go back home. now.. I know that it might lead you to think that I am in some kind of conflict with the people back home but let me make this very clear to you that such is not the case"

"I see you can predict my thinking patterns"

"that's because I have studied and practiced what you have studied and are now practicing. I know what my problem is, I diagnosed myself earlier with what you have diagnosed me now and I also know the possible medication and therapies that you might suggest for my existing state of mind so I would like to tell you that these healthy talks and sessions with you are nothing new to me and my state of hopelessness is beyond any of your remedial measures"

"hmm... I see. let's meet up again tomorrow."

the girl on the bed was a little taken aback by the last few words of the handsome young doctor who had been sitting beside her for the past 15 minutes, trying to elicit out of her the so called 'secrets of her soul' and the cause for her suicide.

to be continued...

The ten habits of remarkably charismatic people!

2012-09-22T22:26:00.001-07:00

Some people instantly make us feel important. Some people instantly make us feel special. Some people light up a room just by walking in.

We can't always define it, but some people have it: They're naturally charismatic.

Unfortunately, natural charisma quickly loses its impact. Familiarity breeds, well, familiarity.

But some people are remarkably charismatic: They build and maintain great relationships, consistently influence (in a good way) the people around them, consistently make people feel better about themselves--they're the kind of people everyone wants to be around...and wants to be.

Fortunately we can, because being remarkably charismatic isn't about our level of success or our presentation skills or how we dress or the image we project--it's about what we do.

Here are the 10 habits of remarkably charismatic people (as for me, I like the last one the most!):

1. They listen way more than they talk.

Ask questions. Maintain eye contact. Smile. Frown. Nod. Respond--not so much verbally, but nonverbally.

That's all it takes to show the other person they're important.

Then when you do speak, don't offer advice unless you're asked. Listening shows you care a lot more than offering advice, because when you offer advice in most cases you make the conversation about you, not them.

Don't believe me? Who is "Here's what I would do..." about: you or the other person?

Only speak when you have something important to say--and always define important as what matters to the other person, not to you.

2. They don't practice selective hearing.

Some people--I guarantee you know people like this--are incapable of hearing anything said by the people they feel are somehow beneath them.

Sure, you speak to them, but that particular falling tree doesn't make a sound in the forest, because there's no one actually listening.

Remarkably charismatic people listen closely to everyone, and they make all of us, regardless of our position or social status or "level," feel like we have something in common with them.

Because we do: We're all people.

3. They put their stuff away.

Don't check your phone. Don't glance at your monitor. Don't focus on anything else, even for a moment.

You can never connect with others if you're busy connecting with your stuff, too.

Give the gift of your full attention. That's a gift few people give. That gift alone will make others want to be around you and remember you.

4. They give before they receive--and often they never receive.

Never think about what you can get. Focus on what you can provide. Giving is the only way to establish a real connection and relationship.

Focus, even in part and even for a moment, on what you can get out of the other person, and you show that the only person who really matters is you.

5. They don't act self-important…

The only people who are impressed by your stuffy, pretentious, self-important self are other stuffy, pretentious, self-important people.

The rest of us aren't impressed. We're irritated, put off, and uncomfortable.

And we hate when you walk in the room.

6. …Because they realize other people are more important.

You already know what you know. You know your opinions. You know your perspectives and points of view.

That stuff isn't important, because it's already yours. You can't learn anything from yourself.

But you don't know what other people know, and everyone, no matter who they are, knows things you don't know.

That makes them a lot more important than you--because they're people you can learn from.

7. They shine the spotlight on others.

No one receives enough praise. No one. Tell people what they did well.

Wait, you say you don't know what they did well?

Shame on you--it's your job to know. It's your job to find out ahead of time.

Not only will people appreciate your praise, they'll appreciate the fact you care enough to pay attention to what they're doing.

Then they'll feel a little more accomplished and a lot more important.

8. They choose their words.

The words you use impact the attitude of others.

For example, you don't have to go to a meeting; you get to go meet with other people. You don't have to create a presentation for a new client; you get to share cool stuff with other people. You don't have to go to the gym; you get to work out and improve your health and fitness.

We all want to associate with happy, enthusiastic, fulfilled people. The words you choose can help other people feel better about themselves--and make you feel better about yourself, too.

9. They don't discuss the failings of others...

Granted, we all like hearing a little gossip. We all like hearing a little dirt.

The problem is, we don't necessarily like--and we definitely don't respect--the people who dish that dirt.

Don't laugh at other people. When you do, the people around you wonder if you sometimes laugh at them.

10. ...But they readily admit their failings.

Incredibly successful people are often assumed to have charisma simply because they're successful. Their success seems to create a halo effect, almost like a glow.

The keyword is seem.

You don't have to be incredibly successful to be remarkably charismatic. Scratch the shiny surface, and many successful people have all the charisma of a rock.

But you do have to be incredibly genuine to be remarkably charismatic.

Be humble. Share your screwups. Admit your mistakes. Be the cautionary tale. And laugh at yourself.

While you should never laugh at other people, you should always laugh at yourself.

People won't laugh at you. People will laugh laugh with you.

They'll like you better for it--and they'll want to be around you a lot more.

Courtesy (except the Italic line): http://smallbusiness.yahoo.com/advisor/the-ten-habits-of-remarkably-charismatic-people.html

The Best Work of Fiction to Date!

2012-07-25T00:54:00.001-07:00

I have been reading a lot of novels lately. Some of them were fine, others were just fine. I can't really remember the last novel that had a lasting impact on me. I know, the mistake might have been on my side because I was committed to complete the 'collection' rather than giving my real attention, perception and imagination to any of those. And tell you what, none of them were themselves not so 'out-of-the-world' to grab my attention as well!
So, coming to what I have in my mind right now, I (the numb gal) finally came across a novel that moved me and when I say moved me, I mean it! It actually brought me to tears! I am referring to an Urdu genre novel published in 2004 by one of the most renowned writers of Pakistan. The novel, without a doubt, is Peer-e-kaamil (S.A.W.W).

Since, my most favorite language to read stuff in is English, so I did not have the courage to read it until it was translated in English. Most recently, I came across a translated version of this book in one of the malls I was visiting. I had heard a lot about it and I knew that one day I will definitely be reading it (in Urdu of course, because I had no idea that Umera herself would be so generous to translate it in English for a non-lexical like me). So there it was, when I found this enchanting book and that too in English, I had every intention to buy it and as soon as I turned the book to see how much did it cost, I was bound to put it back in the shelf from where I had picked it! :( =P

That day, I came home and searched for the same version on the internet and I was relieved and euphoric and excited and flabbergasted to find a PDF version of it and that too 'free-of-cost'! =D

So, I began it.... Oh! and in less than 3 and a half days, I was over and done with it and I was startled to see how much it had touched my heart that my eyes could not get dry for another three days following the completion of the book! It is a master-piece, a real spell-binding, alluring and entrancing book that moved me (the numb gal, as you remember I have mentioned in the beginning). I strongly recommend all my readers to read this novel (which I doubt, if you already haven't).

Hats-off to Umera Ahmed!

Poor Veronika!

2012-05-25T10:55:00.000-07:00

heya!

So I mean, yes! I got addicted to Coelho's writings.

I read another one- Veronika Decides to Die. A young, juvenile, good-looking woman who attempted suicide because her life lacked adventure.

There were very few characters in the novel (except of course the staff of the hospital). The two mad-women that Veronika encounters during her short stay in the hospital, Mari and Zedka. The schizophrenic Eduard, whom Veronika eventually falls in love with and the main character (actually more significant than the girl whose name has been used in the title) Dr. Igor who happened to be the director of the Mental asylum- Vilette. The writer takes you in to the lives of each and everyone named above (including Veronika herself, of course). Half of the time, I kept wondering that what do we have to do with the lives of those with whom the heroine had an encounter, all we- the readers, needed to know was whether or not Veronika made it in the end (although the writer was keeping up the hopes that she had very little to live but being optimists, we still mange to hope for the things that seem unmanageable, unreachable and impossible).

So, never mind if Veronika could or couldn't make it through but what I figured out in the end that the story of Zedka (the depressed), Mari (the one who got panic-attacks), Eduard (the schizophrenic) and Veronika herself (the failed suicidal case) was of little importance as compared to the interesting and completely emotionless plot set up by the director of the asylum- Dr. Igor. I must say, Doc Igor! You're the man!

Brida- the witch.

2012-05-20T03:23:00.000-07:00

Whoa!

Another one by Coelho finished- Brida. Before I discuss about the story of the novel and the way it has been put forth and the character sketch and the impression the novel has left on me, I would like to share a little history associated with this particular novel. The first time I heard about Paulo, I came home, turned the internet on and searched for this author's work. I found all the novels written by him and the only title that attracted me (more than the title that was actually suggested to me for a read) was this- Brida. I have no idea why but when I wrote Brida in the toolbar of the search engine, I discovered this front cover of the novel:

Surprisingly, I found this cover and again, unknowingly, my interest exceeded. I was desperate for this novel. I downloaded many novels by Paulo but Brida was included in my list of the top three (which was neither suggested to me nor was it in the most famous works by Paulo). And so my curiosity led me to finish it in a mere duration of 24 hours.

A spell-binding novel, no doubt! Brida- an ordinary Irish girl with a special Gift for witchcraft set out on a journey to find out answers to her questions about life. The first person she came across (the Magus) was the one she is expected to go with in the end but the end turns out to be even more startling and to some extent- frightening for the ones who are hoping to see the soul-mates together. But the aim of the novel, as far as I figured out, was that not all persons necessarily have 'one' soul-mate. And therefore, we shall always be prepared to never try to 'own' or 'possess' somebody we love because we never know what the fate has in store for us but at the same time, never stop loving too- For when we stop loving, we cease to comprehend the meaning of existence.

The novel was, altogether, a good read :)

Something about Coelho.

2012-05-18T02:00:00.002-07:00

Well, now then, now then...
I couldn't really recollect when was the last time when I actually accomplished 'completing' a novel. I hadn't found any interesting 'fiction', so I really didn't bother finishing any novel that I started. Then, a suggestion came in from more than one sources to read the work by Paulo Coelho. I collected a lot of his work and then I began to wait when my mid-terms would end and I would actually find some spare time to read it. And then that time arrived too and I found myself finishing three novels in three days (one of which was not by Coelho by the way, but never mind)!
The two novels that I read written by the same man were a total contradiction of views (that I thought it was). The first one was 'The Alchemist', which I am sure many people have read by now and certainly I had to enter in the fan-following of Alchemist as well because it is so close to the phenomena such as philosophy, soul searching, raison d'etre, and of course alchemy itself. The second one was 'Eleven Minutes' and OMG! I could only say- what a daring novel! Personally, I learned a lot of history from that novel (and I am glad that I did not learn anything else) but really, I completely disagreed with the writer's approach of the way of putting a dream into reality. Although, at the end it was mentioned that the novel was partly based on a real story but so what?! When someone has such great a number of people following him, he should at least be a little bit cautious. I did not feel weary of lauding the way Alchemist had been written and I still feel its one of the best efforts made by a writer, in fact any writer! But I think it was my own mistake that I chose such a daring novel written on such a bold subject (which doesn't really matter as far as the right is encouraged and the wrong is discouraged) and in that too, such absurdity of scene description has been made. Eleven Minutes was a novel that might be appreciated by the masses but it really makes one feel as if life has no other aim but sex. The fan, refrigerator, air conditioner, television, telephone, airplane, sophisticated watches and mobile phones and all this advancement in science- isn't it all an outcome of the brilliance of human mind? Okay, keeping science apart- the philosophy, psychology, economics, politics, warfare, sociology, civilization, history... even the invention of a small hairpin, the recipe of making a bread loaf out of wheat, the ability to make larger buildings each day- aren't all these aims of humans necessary too except 'that' one (and which is considered to be the most important topic of discussion as well) aim??
I am not making a review of 'Eleven Minutes' the way I made a review of 'The Alchemist' (how well written it is), but still, my only aim was to bring all those important and significant stuff into consideration that has played a pivotal role in differentiating man from other animals- as simple as this.

Equilibrium

2012-01-24T07:50:00.000-08:00

Dear readers!
I had been thinking for a while now, what exactly are the conditions that bring us to sorrow even though we are so cautious at times not to make things go worse and handle the present situation more sensibly than we last did.

But there's always a force that drives us to crazy decisions. At the very moment, it may makes us feel that the decision we made was a catastrophic one! We must had not been in our right mind to decide that, but let me assure you, 90% of all the decisions taken in extreme conditions turn out to be beneficial for us or for our future. But there's one very important thing to remember: even if we have taken a decision that we ourselves do not approve of at that particular time, we need to be determined and stand by our own selves when nobody else is willing to support us. And that is when that driving force comes from within us and helps us stand by what we have done. This force can be named a whim, a rage or simply the strength to believe in ourselves!

This is to strike a balance/ an equilibrium in our life because we can not always be happy and satisfied even if we are provided with the finest of things in our life. We need to experience each and every extreme sentiment so that we can enjoy leisure after hectic tasks, pleasure after melancholy and solace after ambiguity.

So the same thing happened to me today, I was really outrageous at first when I decided on to something really significant in my life (up until now, at least) and then became regretful at the decision too. I knew this one was the hardest amongst all the decisions in my life as yet. I also knew that there would be no looking back from where I am going to stand after making this particular decision but I did (actually, without shedding a drop of tear) yupppee, bravo! ;) But yes, I did feel sad, really really sad! Here, I must mention that decisions taken in an emotional situation are more likely to make one sad than those taken in other situations but when you become the master of your emotions, you give a damn to what you feel! Because feelings makes you go irrational (if exceeded from a certain point/level, of course). And so today, I had a feeling of maturity.

Getting rid of insensible feelings, emotions, believes, stereo-types and people in your life does help you move toward a better position in your life. This is a step toward spiritual satisfaction. Of course, materialistically, you are not getting anything whilst getting rid of such absurdities but spiritually, you are! And that is more important too!

The Silhouette of Quarry- Part (2)

2011-12-24T01:25:00.000-08:00

[NOTE: To enjoy the post below, you better relive (re-read) the previous post with the same name :)]

Oh God! It was still after me [at least I felt it]! I experienced things that made me realize I ought to contact a counsellor. Days went by ... I had to lose things that my personality was made of- my smile, my confidence, my esteem, my self. Traumas and dilemmas took over. Stress was there too. I was a freshman and I had no idea that my academic results too were going to let me down [by the way, I should have known that ;)], but that's how it went. I was flabbergasted at my loss after so inferior a thing such as Silhouette. To describe my feelings at that time in a better way, I must suggest you give a listen to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EfRLmk7Q_q4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKCek6_dB0M&ob=av3e

A year later, becoming a sophomore was a pleasant experience ... I felt good :) I was returning to be a care-free person I used to be long ago. Oh, I was working really hard to get my grades up and make a good total at the end of the two years of Intermediate. I was sublimating my aggression in the form of creativity. I was the apple of the eye of my teachers [English and English Literature teachers especially, because in English you get to pour all the creativity out in a much classical sense :)] The stress of losing some so-called friends at the end of the first year was also going away, I had new and better ones :) And so the second year gave me good grades, highest marks, appreciation from teachers and everything back that usually the parents need more than the child ;) And the most significant thing to mention here that's exactly in accordance with the title of this post is that I didn't even remember the Silhouette. It wasn't anywhere at least in my conscious or sub-conscious, no idea about unconscious! We might find it out later what made me forget (temporarily) the Silhouette.
So, the third year began, it was this 'sms' that brought the lousy, obscure, cryptic, esoteric and unfathomable past back! To be honest, my reply to the message was- "who cares?" ... may be I didn't know myself, I did.
Back then, I did not have this facility at home that is considered of pivotal importance in making world a global village so I might have had a 1% truth in my response. But I knew, I was going to repudiate. I was not unfaithful after all, at least to my own preferences...

So just then, I was introduced to the second most influential being in my life, the Quarry. Again, in this case, I had it in of front me from the start of that year but it felt like I had been blind-folded. It was introduced to me on the day of perusal and I honestly did not know I was going to get affected by it. Oh, I loved to have a comrade like Quarry. Each day, I waited to have a new and memorable talk with it but it was all fading away in the time being. I couldn't do anything to stop it. I did verbalize my fears and desires to it but all of that went in vain. Bad year that was. I loved, respected, tried, fought and wept again. Altogether, it was again a bad academic year. Quarry was very nice [apparently]. Still is very nice [apparently]. Its very nice to cherish the memories of being asked, being neglected and then finally, being refused. Shame on me, but I still manage to love my inner self ;) And can't manage to forget the past. Still have regrets, bruises but its the way it is now, nothing can be done with the events that came and went away in the teens [the age of fire]. The after effects include- I often go blank in scrutiny, I experience disorganized speech, I forget things quickly and easily, have become a lot more lethargic as well ;)
But I am a very nice person now :) [sorry, I had to say that myself 'cause I can't afford to weaken the sense of self-efficacy now ;)]
Forgetting and decoding everything from the memory isn't easy. I did manage to get over the traumatic events, to love and leave the metaphysical beings (that's what to me they are now) but I had to compromise certain innate abilities- I had a very good memory and you might know it by now because I have so much mess within my mind that keeps irritating me and makes me write ironic posts like these but, going back to the phenomenon of completely forgetting the Silhouette and partially forgetting the memorable events with the Quarry; since I still have to face the latter everyday, I now realize that I must have taken help of a psychological phenomenon known as 'motivational forgetting (repression)'. And from where did I come to know of it? Well, there's at least something that we learn from the course that we study everyday at our educational institutes ;) And may be this procedure of M.F is responsible for the obstacles I face and have mentioned at the end of the above paragraph.
Waiting for the end? ~ No, I did not forget them both permanently, I do have this facility at home that is considered of pivotal importance in making the world a global village. I do care and I do follow the 'sms', nearly everyday. And I do feel repentant when I get to see the Quarry everyday (when its not a holiday). But I think now I have become perfectly:

Mind-Boggling perspective Photos.

2011-11-08T22:15:00.000-08:00

The powerful two chickens!

George Silk photographs swimmer Kathy Flicker in a pool in 1962, and the refraction makes it seem as if her head is separate from her body.

The obligatory "holding up the Leaning Tower of Pisa" photo.

Americans never change!

No Photoshop tricks, just a matter of choosing the right perspective (and an ultra-wide angle works well in this case, too).

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? This bald eagle may look like it is jet propelled - but it's actually been photographed as an airplane flies in the distance. In a once-in-a-lifetime shot, the engines' exhaust trails appear as if they are billowing out of the bird's talons as it soars in the air. The extraordinary moment was captured on camera by Pam Mullins close to her home in Prince Rupert, British Columbia, Canada.

A woman in London snaps a photo in Trafalgar Square -- but her position next to a fountain makes it seem as if water is shooting out of the lens.

Climbing a road! But it sure seems like a wall, doesn't it?

Courtesy: http://news.yahoo.com/photos/mind-boggling-perspective-photos-1319756809-slideshow/1-photo-1319755447.html

9 Healthy Snacks for Dieters

2011-10-29T02:09:00.000-07:00

9 Healthy Snacks for Dieters

yahoo at yahoo! if you actually wanna lose some wight :D

The Silhouette of Quarry.

2011-09-24T00:55:00.000-07:00

For many people, this title might be a little unusual, so before I go on explaining my story, I better clarify the title first. The silhouette is a featureless image of anything that consists of only the outlines. And the part where the features are supposed to appear is filled with a solid color, usually black.

This is how a silhouette may look.

And as for the word quarry, this word actually has miscellaneous meanings but the sense I am using it in is: an object of pursuit.

This has been a highly personal experience for so long but I decided to not keep it within anymore. Its been 7 years since I am trying to find the meanings of the terms soul-mate and soul-sister and any other bond that include the word 'soul' in it. A soul is obviously something invisible but the most queer thing about it is that we all somehow feel the presence of this sprite-like thing inside us.

And so it happened to me in these seven years, I met two most influential persons in my life. One for real and the other -well, it was a character created by my own mind. I found them both influential because I was a teen, I was enthusiastic, I was ambitious, I was attracted toward the people who shared my interests or at least possessed those attributes that I myself lacked and wanted to have. Last but not the least, I also had a germ to get everything that I feel like getting. I thought it was possible and easy because I was determined. But what I didn't realize then was that I am a human (like everybody else is) and humans are impotent (powerless)!

So coming to those two persons (whose names it would be better not to publicize- we better call the first character 'silhouette'), with whom I felt a connection to the soul. The first one 'was' actually a silhouette or may be it had been more closer to me but I never paid enough attention to witness it in 'light'. Here, the 'light' refer to a light of divinity- that guides you what is right or wrong or what should be paid attention to (that can be of your interest in the future) and what should be ignored.

And so as I said earlier, I never paid attention to it in right time but when I realized that this silhouette was attracted towards me and that I better respond to it, it was too late. So, keeping in mind to "never give up", I tried to get acquainted with Silhouette myself. This time, my test had begun. It took me only few months to realize that in life, we ought to better deal and respond to the people that like/love us instead of lamenting for those we lost or could never get but this Silhouette made me come to my knees in the next 3 years proving my theory wrong. I tried to remember what so bad did I do to that Silhouette that it was teasing me like this and I recollected that I had been quite rude once in rolling my eyes on to it. I laughed out loud at this recollection! And so I didn't come to know when exactly did I start to fantasize the Silhouette... I was so in with it. I began to do things that you've only heard maniacs and cynics doing. Laughed while crying, cried while laughing, scratched nails onto skin, dialed only 'a' number while calling anybody without any intention to dial it etc but guess what, I was still being ignored by the Silhouette...

Keep in mind that whilst all this was happening, I was in my early teens. The Silhouette was stone-hearted.

High school was over. And I had a new life to look forward to... But this childish character hadn't left me yet.

(the rest of the spiel would be included in the second part and not to mention - the second influential being is still to come) :}

To Be Continued.

Hulkshare.com Nicole Scherzinger - Say Yes (Prod. By RedOne) ( 2o11 ) [ www.MzHipHop.com ].mp3

2011-09-21T20:49:00.000-07:00

Hulkshare.com Nicole Scherzinger - Say Yes (Prod. By RedOne) ( 2o11 ) [ www.MzHipHop.com ].mp3

honestly ...

I am obsessed with this track nowadays :P

Since I can't help being a philharmonic, so I am sharing it here :D

Enchanting!

2011-09-17T10:22:00.000-07:00

Today, I honestly don't feel like saying anything about the photograph that I am going to share here with all of you.

This is a truly amazing and enchanting photo for which at least I lack vocabulary! But if you people know a better word or statement that can do justice to the beauty of it, you are most welcome :) For I am sure my readers are a class apart! :)

This photograph is by Jack Paulus and it has been shot in Cenotes, Chichen-Itza, Mexico. It had the privilege of being the photo of the day for the official National Geographic Website.

4 Secrets To Making Yourself Irresistible!

2011-09-16T08:48:00.000-07:00

Underneath is an article I read a couple of weeks ago and I found it so closer to reality that I decided to share it with all my readers :) Being irresistible and interesting is what we all desire for so here are a few tips to enjoy life and yet become attractive to the people around you! With a few additions and subtractions, I have brought this article to you. Hope you enjoy the read ;)

Four Secrets to Making yourself irresistible:

1) Confidence, confidence, confidence!

One of the most attractive traits you can have is confidence. We are all naturally drawn to people who are self-assured and confident. Part of the reason for this is because we tend to admire people who have traits we would like to possess ourselves. And confidence is one of those traits so many people lack. Also, if one already possesses a positive trait, we are drawn to others who have it as well.
Confident people are appealing because they act from a position of strength. That is, they don’t give their power away easily, and thus are more in control when it comes to interpersonal situations. A truly confident person usually has high self-esteem. As a result she is typically less “needy” in a relationship, drawing others to her, rather than repelling them like needy people do.
Now you may be thinking to yourself, if I am lacking in confidence how do I get it? Well, there are many things you can do to build your self-confidence which are beyond the scope of this article, but the first thing you can do is to “act as if”. This can actually be quite powerful if you do it consistently.
Practice acting as if you are confident. Standing tall and looking people in the eye when you talk to them are two good places to start. Observe others who appear confident and model their behavior. Smile and say hi to people and initiate conversations. You may be quaking in your boots on the inside, but only you need to know that! Acting “as if” is a great way to begin developing any desirable trait, and the more you do it, the more it will develop.

2) Stop being so nice…

This is a far more crucial aspect of attractiveness than most people realize. First, let me clarify that there is nothing wrong with being a truly nice person, IF you are doing it for the right reasons and if you have a lot of other great qualities to go with it. Unfortunately, some people act nice because a) they need to compensate for a lack other positive qualities; b) they are incredibly insecure and desperate to please; or c) they want something from you. In these three cases, “nice” is not really a good trait and makes a person anything but attractive. Have you ever met someone who you thought was “really nice” at first, and then in time, when they didn’t get what they wanted from you they suddenly turned on you and showed a very dark side? Or, perhaps you've met people who are nice in that they are so desperate to win your approval that they always agree with you, always laugh at your jokes, and will do anything you ask them to. Now, how much respect do you have for people who are like that? Probably very little, if any.

Most people appreciate a woman who is secure enough to stand up for herself, says no, disagree, and express her opinion even when it is the opposite of theirs. Not only is it intriguing, it shows confidence and strength. This isn’t to say you should never agree with them or that you should shove your opinions in their face at every opportunity. Rather you want to show that you don’t need their approval; that you are your own person. And that makes you very attractive and interesting.

3) Never talk about your flaws!

Okay, I need to preface this with saying that when you know a person quite well, it’s okay to share some of your most secret self doubts and insecurities. BUT, early on, don’t whine about your flaws! You want them focusing on your strengths and not your faults, so by all means don’t go pointing them out to the people yourself. Because if you do, they would start wondering that if you don't like yourself, what do they like you for?!

4) Leave them with a desire to know you more...

This is vital, specially when you have succeeded in impressing someone, it is better not to give away your thoughts, aims, desires, secrets, strengths and weaknesses - all at once. leave them to explore you with the passage of time. Because if they would know all about you in no less than one or two meetings, they might get bored of you too quickly. So act wisely and live happily ;)

Courtesy: http://healthyandbeloved.com/?p=71

Similitude!

2011-09-15T20:34:00.000-07:00

Rains are so very much like your memories to me. Have you ever thought why I relate them with you memories?
Because each rain drop is like a single past moment that comes from the high Welkin and dies when it touches the earth ... Like every past moment of ours started with the peak of contentedness and died with a tear that rolled directly from the heart and ended at the bottom of the cheek.
Tears - say raindrops. Oh! tears. Have you ever thought why do they come? Why do we feel like weeping whenever we are vague? They come when patience overs, when we are so filled with emotions that we can take it no more and so we flow our emotions out in the shape of tears.
Tears and raindrops, so many similes to them. let us discover a few more ...
Pearls. Gosh pearls, amazing aren't they?
Excellent pearl comes from the heart of the ocean onto the sea shore. A single pearl comes from a million oysters. Have we ever thought why the oyster with the pearl decides to leave the depths and comes on to the shore? Because it wants to be found out by the ones who are aware of its worth!
More similitude? Of course there are! Dew drops - filled with beauty, absolutely stunning! They are often seen in winter on the leaves, flowers and stems. Why do they ever appear in the dryness of winter? ~ To increase the beauty of everything where they fall. To give a feeling of freshness, care and warmth. Oh dew, lovely it is!
Let us compare all the similes now. Dew express freshness, pearls exhibit beauty, raindrops express the heaviness of welkin and tears ... what do they express? We can not say only woes, they come at happy moments too! All we can say about tears is that they simply express our hearts !!!

Introduction.

2011-09-15T01:23:00.000-07:00

Salaam to everybody who care reading this blog :)
I am glad that finally I am giving up my diaries and those stapled pages that have been my friend for so long and am going to publish my work here. Although some other social websites have had the privilege to make my friends familiar with my writing skills but I must say - a blog is a blog, there's no match to it ;)
Well, introducing you to my interests, likes, dislikes and skills is something really significant to do. I just like expressing myself and the medium that I chose to do so is writing (the best part about my writing is that it covers multiple topics and issues and I hope that you guys would find it unique in every way). I write almost everything - essays, poems, fables (where of course the characters always portray a part of me) ;). So here I am ... getting started ... Wish Me Luck! :)
Hope you'll have a good time in knowing me and the person within me and please, always feel free to express yourself through comments and suggestions :) good luck!